1
00:00:02,936 --> 00:00:04,303
[godzilla roars]
2
00:00:04,337 --> 00:00:04,937
Man: now, it--
3
00:00:04,971 --> 00:00:07,206
[click, click, click]
4
00:00:07,240 --> 00:00:09,641
Ooh, look!
It's super nanny!
5
00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:12,711
[music playing]
6
00:00:12,746 --> 00:00:14,513
Did you ssuper nanny?
7
00:00:14,547 --> 00:00:16,915
Who is this
so-called "super nanny"?
8
00:00:16,950 --> 00:00:18,851
It's nobody,
captain hero.
9
00:00:18,885 --> 00:00:20,285
Don't worry
about it.
10
00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:24,490
Why has no one informed
me of this super nanny?
11
00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:27,459
Oh, lord. Here go
captain tardo again.
12
00:00:27,494 --> 00:00:30,996
Every time he hears about
something else being super,
13
00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:32,431
He goes a little bit nuts,
14
00:00:32,465 --> 00:00:34,733
Like when he first heard
of a supermarket.
15
00:00:34,768 --> 00:00:37,603
You're not
so super now! Hah!
16
00:00:37,637 --> 00:00:39,638
[people screaming]
17
00:00:39,673 --> 00:00:41,173
And super glue.
18
00:00:41,207 --> 00:00:44,410
Damn you, super glue!
Hyah! Hyah!
19
00:00:44,444 --> 00:00:47,546
And of course, that incident
with the soup or salad.
20
00:00:47,580 --> 00:00:50,416
Show yourself,
super salad! Hyah! Wah!
21
00:00:50,450 --> 00:00:54,086
Sir, I was just
asking you if you
want soor salad.
22
00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:55,788
I'm giving you
a choice between
the tw--
23
00:00:55,822 --> 00:00:57,456
Uhh! Hyah!
24
00:00:57,490 --> 00:01:00,125
Super nanny
is just a tv show
25
00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:02,728
About some unruly kids
in need of a good ass-beating.
26
00:01:02,762 --> 00:01:06,331
That is exactly what
she wants you to think.
27
00:01:06,366 --> 00:01:07,599
Hyah!
28
00:01:07,634 --> 00:01:09,201
[crash]
29
00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:11,470
Ah, this ought to be
entertaining.
30
00:01:11,504 --> 00:01:13,739
Hey, ling-ling,
get us some beer!
31
00:01:13,773 --> 00:01:14,707
[speaking japanese]
32
00:01:18,878 --> 00:01:22,614
You don't have
a driver's license?
33
00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:24,917
Spanky: since
the dawn of time,
34
00:01:24,951 --> 00:01:27,853
I've dreamed of escorting
an asian to the dmv
35
00:01:27,887 --> 00:01:30,756
To watch him
take a driver's test.
36
00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:33,258
Finally, that day has come!
37
00:01:33,293 --> 00:01:35,761
Saddle up,
my lo mein man!
38
00:01:35,795 --> 00:01:40,032
We goin' on
a field trip!
Yee-haw!
39
00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:49,341
Captain hero:
just the thought of this
super nanny made me sick.
40
00:01:49,376 --> 00:01:54,813
I needed to confront her
and find out how super
she really was.
41
00:01:54,848 --> 00:01:57,916
Computer, where
is this super nanny?
42
00:01:57,951 --> 00:02:00,586
[silence]
43
00:02:00,620 --> 00:02:03,989
Computer, where
is this super nanny?
44
00:02:04,024 --> 00:02:06,658
[silence]
45
00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:09,962
Cuisinart, why isn't
computer talking to me?
46
00:02:09,996 --> 00:02:13,432
Oh, god! Why isn't
anybody answering me?
47
00:02:13,466 --> 00:02:14,967
Plug-in air freshener?
48
00:02:15,001 --> 00:02:17,736
3-prong to 2-prong adapter?
49
00:02:17,771 --> 00:02:18,737
You, too?
50
00:02:18,772 --> 00:02:21,807
Noooooo!
51
00:02:21,841 --> 00:02:24,610
And then I realized
that there was one way
52
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:27,646
I could make super nanny
come to me.
53
00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:30,649
I want chocolate milk!
I want chocolate milk!
54
00:02:30,684 --> 00:02:32,818
What the heck?
55
00:02:32,852 --> 00:02:36,221
Just give him some
chocolate milk,
for christmas' sake!
56
00:02:36,256 --> 00:02:38,390
We don't have any more!
57
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,727
I hate you, I hate you,
I hate you, I hate you!
58
00:02:41,761 --> 00:02:43,028
[wailing]
59
00:02:43,063 --> 00:02:44,530
Don't leave me again!
60
00:02:44,564 --> 00:02:46,165
Quick! What
are we gonna do?
61
00:02:46,199 --> 00:02:47,633
We need a professional.
62
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:51,437
We're going to have to
call super nanny.
63
00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:55,541
Oh, yes. Call
your super nanny.
64
00:02:58,144 --> 00:03:00,346
[chatter]
65
00:03:00,380 --> 00:03:03,215
[silence]
66
00:03:03,249 --> 00:03:07,286
I'm here to help
my little friend get
himself a driver's license.
67
00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:08,687
Are you trying
to get us killed?
68
00:03:08,722 --> 00:03:09,855
Don't you
realize he's--
69
00:03:09,889 --> 00:03:12,191
Asian? Yeah. I know.
70
00:03:12,225 --> 00:03:14,126
Now let's get to it.
71
00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:16,628
Spanky: naturally,
ling-ling aced
the written test,
72
00:03:16,663 --> 00:03:17,963
And coincidentally,
73
00:03:17,997 --> 00:03:20,733
So did all the
retarded white people
sitting around him.
74
00:03:22,435 --> 00:03:24,670
And he narrowly passed
the eye exam.
75
00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:26,872
"r," "r,"
76
00:03:26,906 --> 00:03:29,375
"r," "r."
77
00:03:30,944 --> 00:03:34,346
Martin luther king had
a dream, and so did I.
78
00:03:34,381 --> 00:03:38,684
But unlike martin
luther king, my dream
was about to come true.
79
00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:41,954
All right. Fasten
your seat belt and--
80
00:03:41,988 --> 00:03:44,690
Holy fucking crap!
81
00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:45,391
[speaking japanese]
82
00:03:48,661 --> 00:03:50,662
[engine starts]
83
00:03:50,697 --> 00:03:53,265
[horns blaring]
84
00:03:53,299 --> 00:03:56,802
[spanky laughing]
85
00:03:56,836 --> 00:03:59,138
[ling-ling crying]
86
00:03:59,172 --> 00:04:01,640
Spanky:
ling-ling? Uh-oh.
87
00:04:02,709 --> 00:04:04,543
Rrrr! Crrrssssh!
88
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,380
Please stop.
89
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:10,315
[knocks]
90
00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:14,153
Oh! Thank jesus
you're here,
super nanny!
91
00:04:14,187 --> 00:04:17,756
Captain hero: my plan
to lure the super nanny
to me had worked!
92
00:04:17,791 --> 00:04:20,025
At last we meet,
super nanny!
93
00:04:20,060 --> 00:04:21,994
So, what you got,
toots?
94
00:04:22,028 --> 00:04:23,696
A little x-ray vision,
heat vision,
95
00:04:23,730 --> 00:04:26,298
Or like our president,
no vision at all?
96
00:04:26,332 --> 00:04:28,267
Ha ha ha ha ha!
97
00:04:28,301 --> 00:04:30,135
That's super satire.
98
00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:33,305
This kind of backtalk
is totally unacceptable.
99
00:04:33,340 --> 00:04:36,175
You don't
have any powers,
do you poopie-head?
100
00:04:36,209 --> 00:04:37,543
Pbbbt!
101
00:04:37,577 --> 00:04:38,944
All right, captain hero.
102
00:04:38,978 --> 00:04:40,979
You're going to sit
on this naughty stool
103
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:42,881
Till I tell you
to get off.
104
00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:45,084
You don't actually
expect me to get--
105
00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:47,286
I said naughty stool!
[gasps]
106
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:53,592
Oh, she's good.
A little too good.
107
00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:55,260
Can I get off now?
108
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:58,330
Come on! I don't want
to be on the naughty stool.
109
00:04:58,365 --> 00:05:00,499
No, no, no!
110
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:06,305
Now apologize,
and you can get off
the naughty stool.
111
00:05:06,339 --> 00:05:10,976
Oh, fine. I'm sorry.
112
00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:15,447
Captain hero: I had
totally underestimated
the super nanny.
113
00:05:15,482 --> 00:05:18,217
I'm not eating this crap!
114
00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:20,285
Unacceptable.
Naughty stool.
115
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:22,087
Ohhhh.
116
00:05:22,122 --> 00:05:23,455
[slurping]
117
00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:25,257
I said, give me the remote!
118
00:05:25,291 --> 00:05:26,258
[rip]
119
00:05:26,292 --> 00:05:28,260
Unacceptable.
Naughty stool.
120
00:05:28,294 --> 00:05:29,628
Ohhhh.
121
00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:33,699
[gasps] unacceptable.
Naughty stool.
122
00:05:33,733 --> 00:05:34,833
Ohhhh.
123
00:05:34,868 --> 00:05:38,504
Something had to be done.
I had to find a way
124
00:05:38,538 --> 00:05:41,640
To defeat her
and her naughty stool.
125
00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:42,941
But how?
126
00:05:42,976 --> 00:05:47,513
But...How?
127
00:05:47,547 --> 00:05:50,382
You know, if you just
keep the camera rolling,
128
00:05:50,417 --> 00:05:52,685
It's not nearly as dramatic.
129
00:05:58,992 --> 00:06:01,760
Aw, jerkoff assholes.
130
00:06:01,795 --> 00:06:04,096
[moans]
131
00:06:05,298 --> 00:06:07,433
I got ling-ling's
test results back.
132
00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:08,901
[snap]
133
00:06:08,935 --> 00:06:11,103
He has suffered
a mild concussion.
134
00:06:11,137 --> 00:06:13,672
The best thing
for him now is
to get some rest...
135
00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:16,008
In bed.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
136
00:06:16,042 --> 00:06:18,344
Simpler time. Ahh!
137
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:22,014
Spanky, this is
all your fault!
138
00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:24,350
It's not spanky's fault
ling-ling was injured.
139
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:26,018
There is a simple
biological reason
140
00:06:26,052 --> 00:06:28,287
Why he can't drive
no good. Observe!
141
00:06:28,321 --> 00:06:29,955
[whir]
142
00:06:29,989 --> 00:06:33,726
This helmet
simulates the way
asians see the world.
143
00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:34,793
Step in!
144
00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:37,229
Wooldoor, this is some
retarded racist crap!
145
00:06:37,263 --> 00:06:39,498
Asians don't see the world
any differently than we do.
146
00:06:39,532 --> 00:06:43,402
[whir]
147
00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:48,140
[speaking japanese]
148
00:06:48,174 --> 00:06:50,142
Clara, tell me
what you see.
149
00:06:50,176 --> 00:06:52,578
Hmm...
Beef and broccoli.
150
00:06:53,646 --> 00:06:56,548
2 guys who look
completely different.
151
00:06:57,650 --> 00:06:59,018
7.
152
00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:01,220
Now take a look at this.
153
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,788
[gasps]
[horns blaring]
154
00:07:02,822 --> 00:07:04,023
Aah! Watch out!
155
00:07:04,057 --> 00:07:05,157
Turn without signaling!
156
00:07:05,191 --> 00:07:06,392
Hit the brakes suddenly!
157
00:07:06,426 --> 00:07:07,893
Drive in the wrong lane!
158
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:08,894
Uhh!
159
00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:10,029
Uhh!
160
00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:12,698
Still think
being asian is cool?
161
00:07:12,732 --> 00:07:14,800
Wooldoor, if you
could fix my arm,
162
00:07:14,834 --> 00:07:17,603
I'm sure you could
fix ling-ling's
vision, right?
163
00:07:17,637 --> 00:07:18,837
[tweet tweet]
164
00:07:18,872 --> 00:07:19,872
[hollow thud]
165
00:07:19,906 --> 00:07:22,107
Hmm...
166
00:07:22,142 --> 00:07:26,145
Wooldoor:
this expression
means I am thinking.
167
00:07:26,179 --> 00:07:28,414
That british nanny
has really shaken me up.
168
00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:31,550
I must find a way
to defeat her and
her stupid naughty stool.
169
00:07:31,584 --> 00:07:33,385
It's just not fair!
170
00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:36,388
Um...If you don't
want to be sent to
the naughty stool,
171
00:07:36,423 --> 00:07:38,390
Why don't you
just behave yourself?
172
00:07:38,425 --> 00:07:41,660
How dare you!
Why, I'll show you...
173
00:07:41,695 --> 00:07:44,730
How monkeys
groom each other.
174
00:07:44,764 --> 00:07:47,966
Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
175
00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:51,270
Good, captain hero.
That is acceptable.
176
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:53,605
Here. Have a lolly.
177
00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:55,941
Hah! See that?
I told you so!
178
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:56,942
[monkey screeches]
179
00:07:56,976 --> 00:07:59,712
Hmm. No naughty stool.
180
00:07:59,746 --> 00:08:02,614
Maybe, just maybe,
if I play along,
181
00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:04,550
Eat my veggies,
go to bed on time,
182
00:08:04,584 --> 00:08:06,985
And stop hunting
male prostitutes
with a crossbow,
183
00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:09,555
I will render
super nanny powerless!
184
00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,826
Wooldoor: I had accepted
my roommate's challenge
185
00:08:13,860 --> 00:08:17,262
To give ling-ling
a round eye
for the asian guy.
186
00:08:17,297 --> 00:08:20,699
To help ling-ling,
I've used the most
sophisticated technology
187
00:08:20,734 --> 00:08:22,735
That modern medicine
can provide.
188
00:08:22,769 --> 00:08:25,337
Household tape.
¶ alleluia ¶
189
00:08:28,241 --> 00:08:31,410
Easy ling-ling, easy.
190
00:08:31,444 --> 00:08:33,846
Behold!
191
00:08:36,049 --> 00:08:38,717
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
192
00:08:38,752 --> 00:08:39,685
[thud]
193
00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:45,057
Oh, my god!
Everything look different!
194
00:08:45,091 --> 00:08:48,293
What?! I speak
english now, too?
195
00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:49,895
Wooldoor
fixed your eyes.
196
00:08:49,929 --> 00:08:52,031
Now you're just
like the rest of us.
197
00:08:52,065 --> 00:08:56,335
It's true. You're
finally seeing things
the way we see them.
198
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:57,603
Normal people.
199
00:08:57,637 --> 00:09:01,340
Whoa. This a lot to handle.
200
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:06,311
Everything be ok as
long as ling-ling still
have humongous penis.
201
00:09:07,647 --> 00:09:10,315
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
202
00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:13,786
Ling-ling want old eyes
back or I kill you all!
203
00:09:13,820 --> 00:09:17,990
Relax, ling-ling,
and take a look at this.
204
00:09:18,024 --> 00:09:22,728
Ooh. That look like
a road, but much calmer.
205
00:09:22,762 --> 00:09:24,663
I bet I can drive on that.
206
00:09:24,698 --> 00:09:27,333
Ling-ling have chance
to redeem himself.
207
00:09:27,367 --> 00:09:30,869
Honorable pig demon,
we must return to
the place of shame.
208
00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:33,105
Oh, you mean the
shower at the y?
209
00:09:33,139 --> 00:09:38,944
No. The department
of motor vehicles.
210
00:09:40,947 --> 00:09:44,350
Captain hero: so I started
acting like a good boy,
211
00:09:44,384 --> 00:09:46,618
Which rendered super nanny
and the naughty stool
212
00:09:46,653 --> 00:09:50,789
As powerless as a midget
in a getting-stuff-off-
a-high-shelf contest.
213
00:09:50,824 --> 00:09:53,258
Ooh, lookie-lookie,
all gone-gone.
214
00:09:53,293 --> 00:09:55,361
Peas go bye-bye
into my tummy.
215
00:09:55,395 --> 00:09:59,298
See? Ahhhhhhhhh.
216
00:09:59,332 --> 00:10:03,335
Shall I bring me dishes
to the sink before I go
off to me bed, milady?
217
00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:04,436
You may.
218
00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:05,804
Captain hero: and that's
when I realized
219
00:10:05,839 --> 00:10:07,606
That since
super nanny was here,
220
00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:09,575
I was well-rested,
less grumpy,
221
00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:13,345
And I hadn't made
oopsy-daisies in my bed
for 3 nights in a row.
222
00:10:13,380 --> 00:10:16,648
2 more nights, and it's
hello, big-boy pants.
223
00:10:19,185 --> 00:10:21,086
Good night,
captain hero.
224
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:23,789
Uh, super nanny,
I just wanted to say,
225
00:10:23,823 --> 00:10:26,992
Well, you know,
at first, I thought
you were, like,
226
00:10:27,027 --> 00:10:29,128
Trying to be more super
than me and stuff.
227
00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:32,498
Now I realize
you were just trying
to help and junk.
228
00:10:32,532 --> 00:10:35,634
I guess what I'm trying
to say is, thank you.
229
00:10:35,669 --> 00:10:39,638
Captain hero,
you are acceptable.
Mwah!
230
00:10:39,673 --> 00:10:43,275
Oh! Could you please
check under the bed
for monster-monsters?
231
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:44,843
No monsters, honey.
232
00:10:44,878 --> 00:10:46,378
Just some
wadded up tissues
233
00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:48,547
And a book of
crime scene photos.
234
00:10:48,581 --> 00:10:49,515
[click]
235
00:10:54,754 --> 00:10:55,721
Aah!
236
00:10:55,755 --> 00:10:57,156
Not today.
237
00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:58,357
[engine starts]
238
00:10:58,391 --> 00:11:00,159
Aah! Aaaaaah!
239
00:11:00,193 --> 00:11:02,561
Oh! We're alive!
240
00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:07,766
¶ who's that guy? ¶
241
00:11:07,801 --> 00:11:09,735
¶ where did he
come from? ¶
242
00:11:09,769 --> 00:11:11,103
¶ who's that guy? ¶
243
00:11:11,137 --> 00:11:12,971
¶ where can I
get one? ¶
244
00:11:13,006 --> 00:11:16,508
¶ seems to me
that he can really ¶
245
00:11:16,543 --> 00:11:18,143
¶ drive ¶
¶ drive ¶
¶ drive ¶
246
00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,746
¶ won't somebody
tell me? ¶
247
00:11:20,780 --> 00:11:21,747
Who's that guy?
248
00:11:21,781 --> 00:11:22,748
Who's that guy?
249
00:11:22,782 --> 00:11:24,249
Who's that guy?
Who's that guy?
250
00:11:24,284 --> 00:11:25,884
Why don't I let him
tell you?
251
00:11:25,919 --> 00:11:30,089
[tires squeal]
252
00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:35,160
[cheering]
253
00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:36,428
[flashbulbs popping]
254
00:11:39,632 --> 00:11:42,468
[maniac playing on tv]
255
00:11:43,737 --> 00:11:45,804
Hey, is that my barrette?
256
00:11:45,839 --> 00:11:47,373
No, it is not!
257
00:11:47,407 --> 00:11:48,374
Let me see!
Let me see!
258
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:50,009
What's
going on here?
259
00:11:50,043 --> 00:11:53,746
Oh, nothing.
Captain "shero" was just
trying to take my barrette!
260
00:11:53,780 --> 00:11:56,281
It's pronounced
captain hero,
261
00:11:56,316 --> 00:11:59,184
The "s" is silent,
you hit-head.
262
00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:02,021
Captain hero,
enough! To the naughty
stool with you!
263
00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:03,389
But--but I--I--
264
00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:06,225
I said, naughty stool!
Oh!
265
00:12:06,259 --> 00:12:10,829
Super nanny had always been
so fair, but now, she was
being super not-fair!
266
00:12:10,864 --> 00:12:12,398
Why would she--wait!
267
00:12:12,432 --> 00:12:14,466
Oh, no! No!
I'm out of quarters!
268
00:12:14,501 --> 00:12:15,567
I've got more to say!
269
00:12:15,602 --> 00:12:16,568
[clank]
270
00:12:16,603 --> 00:12:18,337
Aw, jerkoff assholes!
271
00:12:19,506 --> 00:12:23,776
[cheering]
272
00:12:23,810 --> 00:12:24,910
[flashbulbs popping]
273
00:12:24,944 --> 00:12:28,681
There he goes--
the greatest asian ever.
274
00:12:28,715 --> 00:12:30,082
[flashbulb pops]
275
00:12:30,116 --> 00:12:33,018
Spanky: word quickly
spread about ling-ling
and his new eyes.
276
00:12:33,053 --> 00:12:35,754
Soon, he was the
shrimp toast of the town.
277
00:12:35,789 --> 00:12:39,425
Across the globe,
asians everywhere wanted
to be like ling-ling
278
00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,293
And had the
wide-eye procedure.
279
00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:43,796
Oh, no wonder I get
robbed all the time!
280
00:12:43,830 --> 00:12:46,398
I open store
in terrible part
of the city.
281
00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:47,766
Thank you,
ling-ling!
282
00:12:47,801 --> 00:12:50,302
Oh, wow! My pants
have a zipper!
283
00:12:50,337 --> 00:12:53,772
No need to have pants
and underwear down around
ankles to make pee-pee.
284
00:12:53,807 --> 00:12:55,507
Thank you, ling-ling!
285
00:12:55,542 --> 00:12:56,909
Wait a minute.
286
00:12:56,943 --> 00:12:59,812
That not a sore
shoulder muscle
hanging between your leg.
287
00:12:59,846 --> 00:13:02,848
I not touch that
for all the tea in china.
288
00:13:02,882 --> 00:13:04,016
Thank you, ling-ling!
289
00:13:06,219 --> 00:13:10,055
Oh, this all we got?
That not so much tea.
290
00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:12,024
Thank you, ling-ling!
291
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:14,493
[cheering and
flashbulbs popping]
292
00:13:14,527 --> 00:13:17,463
Ling-ling,
you got mail.
293
00:13:17,497 --> 00:13:19,832
It's from the naayp.
294
00:13:19,866 --> 00:13:21,667
Holy egg roll-y!
295
00:13:21,701 --> 00:13:25,537
I am being awarded
the prestigious
asian image award!
296
00:13:25,572 --> 00:13:27,072
What am I going to wear,
297
00:13:27,107 --> 00:13:31,377
Now that I can see hawaiian
shirt not appropriate
for formal event?
298
00:13:31,411 --> 00:13:34,747
¶ you got in trouble,
you got in trouble ¶
299
00:13:34,781 --> 00:13:36,949
Aw, zip your
fudge-hole, orca!
300
00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:38,684
Aw, sucks to be you!
301
00:13:38,718 --> 00:13:40,753
Hey, hero, want to
go in the hot tub?
302
00:13:40,787 --> 00:13:42,721
Oh, I forgot!
You can't!
303
00:13:42,756 --> 00:13:45,190
You're on
the naughty stool.
Hee hee hee!
304
00:13:45,225 --> 00:13:47,326
Hey, hero,
want to watch tv?
305
00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:50,262
Oops! I forgot.
You can't.
306
00:13:50,296 --> 00:13:52,498
You're on
the naughty stool!
307
00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:57,202
I knew what was going on.
Toot wasn't forgetting
I was on the naughty stool.
308
00:13:57,237 --> 00:13:59,938
She was trying
to make me jealous.
309
00:13:59,973 --> 00:14:01,473
Toot:
¶ I'm watching tv ¶
310
00:14:01,508 --> 00:14:04,009
God damn it! Stupid
breaking news!
311
00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:06,545
[gasps]
breaking news?
312
00:14:09,115 --> 00:14:12,217
A scary scene took
place today in front
of the white house.
313
00:14:12,252 --> 00:14:14,420
It's unclear what
the mini-troopers want
314
00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:16,722
Or if the president
is still alive.
315
00:14:16,756 --> 00:14:18,557
Captain hero,
where are you?
316
00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:20,325
Jesús cristo!
317
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,761
Super nanny! Super nanny,
where are you?
318
00:14:22,796 --> 00:14:26,098
You've got to let me
off the naughty stool
so I can save the day!
319
00:14:26,132 --> 00:14:27,599
Super nanny!
320
00:14:32,405 --> 00:14:35,174
Ling-ling:
ling-ling arrived
to accept great honor,
321
00:14:35,208 --> 00:14:38,577
But some huge asshole
decide to be buzz-kill.
322
00:14:38,611 --> 00:14:39,845
What the hell?!
323
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:43,282
[roaring]
324
00:14:46,953 --> 00:14:48,821
What? Shut up, godzilla.
325
00:14:48,855 --> 00:14:50,389
You're just jealous.
326
00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:53,559
[roaring]
327
00:15:00,433 --> 00:15:03,268
You so full of hot air,
you breathe fire.
328
00:15:03,303 --> 00:15:05,604
Ling-ling pretty
proud of that one.
329
00:15:05,638 --> 00:15:09,208
This was madness!
The white house
was under attack,
330
00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:10,743
And I was
powerless to help.
331
00:15:10,777 --> 00:15:13,412
I needed to call
my super friends
to cover for me
332
00:15:13,446 --> 00:15:14,880
And save the day!
333
00:15:14,914 --> 00:15:16,415
Hey, batman, dude, listen.
334
00:15:16,449 --> 00:15:17,783
The white house
is under attack.
335
00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:20,052
Can you get over there
and--what?
336
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:22,054
You're on the
naughty stool, too?
337
00:15:22,088 --> 00:15:23,589
But why?
338
00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:27,359
Well, that's not
a very nice joke
to play on alfred.
339
00:15:27,394 --> 00:15:29,461
He needs those pills
to live.
340
00:15:30,897 --> 00:15:33,532
Hey, spidey, brougham,
could you do me a solid?
341
00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:37,336
What? The naughty stool?
You, too?
342
00:15:37,370 --> 00:15:39,238
It turned out
all my super friends
343
00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:40,839
Had been sent to
the naughty stool.
344
00:15:40,874 --> 00:15:43,909
Green lantern, the hulk,
even ethan hawkman!
345
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:46,979
It didn't make any
sense at all until...
346
00:15:47,013 --> 00:15:48,414
[alarm]
347
00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:51,583
Super nanny! My god!
She's done this to
all the superheroes
348
00:15:51,618 --> 00:15:53,585
So she can
take over the world.
349
00:15:53,620 --> 00:15:55,120
Oh, she's super, all right.
350
00:15:55,155 --> 00:15:57,456
[clatter]
351
00:16:03,296 --> 00:16:07,700
Super evil!
352
00:16:07,734 --> 00:16:08,701
Super evil!
353
00:16:11,771 --> 00:16:13,238
[music playing]
354
00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:16,041
Ling-ling: ling-ling
was excited about
receiving award,
355
00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:20,045
But something
in the back of his head
kept nagging him.
356
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:25,117
[roars]
357
00:16:25,151 --> 00:16:27,052
Godzilla was all wrong!
358
00:16:27,087 --> 00:16:29,621
Ling-ling not stripping
asians of our culture!
359
00:16:29,656 --> 00:16:33,459
My people would never become
fat, lazy, and bad at math.
360
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:39,965
And you're on in 5,
7, p--ah, forget it.
361
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,901
Announcer: ladies and
gentlemen, ling-ling!
362
00:16:42,936 --> 00:16:45,971
[cheering and applause]
363
00:16:49,743 --> 00:16:52,177
Ling-ling thank you
all for award.
364
00:16:52,212 --> 00:16:55,447
This...Great...Honor.
365
00:16:57,000 --> 00:17:03,074
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366
00:17:04,124 --> 00:17:05,457
[sighs]
367
00:17:05,492 --> 00:17:08,060
But ling-ling
no deserve this honor.
368
00:17:08,094 --> 00:17:11,296
He turn his back
on culture, and for that,
369
00:17:11,331 --> 00:17:14,667
Ling-ling is so very sorry.
370
00:17:14,701 --> 00:17:18,337
[crowd murmuring]
371
00:17:19,806 --> 00:17:23,342
[speaking japanese]
372
00:17:42,462 --> 00:17:44,997
[roars]
373
00:17:45,031 --> 00:17:46,131
[crash]
374
00:17:46,166 --> 00:17:47,499
[crash]
[crash]
375
00:17:47,534 --> 00:17:54,306
[crash]
376
00:17:54,341 --> 00:17:56,508
Get off
the damn stool, fool!
377
00:17:56,543 --> 00:17:57,976
You need to
save the world!
378
00:17:58,011 --> 00:18:00,012
I can't get off
the naughty stool.
379
00:18:00,046 --> 00:18:01,914
I'm not allowed.
380
00:18:01,948 --> 00:18:04,550
Well, what if you
just take the fucking
naughty stool with you?
381
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:05,951
Oh, don't be crazy!
382
00:18:05,985 --> 00:18:09,221
I can't carry a stool
and flap my arms
at the same time!
383
00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:10,989
Oh, yeah. That is
a pretty good point.
384
00:18:11,024 --> 00:18:13,792
Shut up, xandir!
Stupid, stupid,
stupid!
385
00:18:13,827 --> 00:18:16,562
Well, that's what
you get for trying to
take my barrette!
386
00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:19,898
Hold it. If this
is your barrette,
387
00:18:19,933 --> 00:18:23,035
Then why do it have
the captain hero
symbol on it?
388
00:18:23,069 --> 00:18:24,470
Told you
it was mine.
389
00:18:24,504 --> 00:18:26,238
Everyone thinks I'm a liar!
390
00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:28,741
Well, I'm a lot of things.
I'm an astronaut,
391
00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:30,242
I'm a basketball player,
392
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:33,278
I'm the president
of the universe
with a 14-inch cock,
393
00:18:33,313 --> 00:18:35,080
But I'm not a liar.
394
00:18:35,115 --> 00:18:37,516
Now, toot, give me
my barrette.
395
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:38,851
It's my favorite.
396
00:18:38,885 --> 00:18:40,919
No offense,
rhinestone kitty.
397
00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:44,957
Fine, ok?! I stole it
from hero's room, ok?
398
00:18:44,991 --> 00:18:47,760
See, hero, you have
no business being
on that stool.
399
00:18:47,794 --> 00:18:49,461
It was your barrette
all along.
400
00:18:49,496 --> 00:18:52,031
Now get
off the stool
and say the word!
401
00:18:52,065 --> 00:18:54,400
You're right.
I'm off! Hyah!
402
00:18:54,434 --> 00:18:57,369
[panting]
403
00:18:59,072 --> 00:19:01,840
America, allow me
to introduce myself.
404
00:19:01,875 --> 00:19:05,778
I am super nanny,
and I am your new leader.
405
00:19:05,812 --> 00:19:06,779
[splat]
406
00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:08,881
Not today,
super nanny!
[gasps]
407
00:19:08,915 --> 00:19:10,182
Captain hero?!
408
00:19:10,216 --> 00:19:12,584
Time to send your
ass back to méxico.
409
00:19:12,619 --> 00:19:14,253
Auf wiedersehen,
frenchie!
410
00:19:14,287 --> 00:19:17,189
I don't know how you
got off that bloody stool,
411
00:19:17,223 --> 00:19:18,957
But you're too late
to stop me!
412
00:19:18,992 --> 00:19:23,595
My army of
super-disciplined children
obey my every command!
413
00:19:23,630 --> 00:19:25,097
Isn't that true, billy?
414
00:19:25,131 --> 00:19:29,668
Go ahead. Show
mr. Hero the power
of british discipline.
415
00:19:30,837 --> 00:19:31,937
[crack]
416
00:19:31,971 --> 00:19:35,941
Ooh! There's nothing
you can do to stop me.
417
00:19:35,975 --> 00:19:36,942
Oh, really?
418
00:19:36,976 --> 00:19:37,943
[crunch]
[gasps]
419
00:19:37,977 --> 00:19:40,946
Holy mother fucking shit!
That hurts!
420
00:19:40,980 --> 00:19:42,214
Oops. Sorry.
421
00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:44,917
Do you think
you can stop me
by stomping on my foot?
422
00:19:44,951 --> 00:19:47,119
Well,
unless I'm mistaken,
423
00:19:47,153 --> 00:19:50,155
Naughty language
like that will get
a certain potty-mouth
424
00:19:50,190 --> 00:19:54,126
Some serious time
on the naughty stool.
425
00:19:54,160 --> 00:19:56,128
Oh, wait!
Wait! You can't!
426
00:19:56,162 --> 00:19:58,564
To the
naughty stool!
427
00:19:58,598 --> 00:20:00,966
Ohhh!
428
00:20:02,002 --> 00:20:04,636
[power down]
429
00:20:04,671 --> 00:20:07,106
Kids: we're free,
we're free!
430
00:20:07,140 --> 00:20:09,341
Super nanny used us!
Get her!
431
00:20:09,376 --> 00:20:11,210
Take that! And that!
432
00:20:11,244 --> 00:20:14,446
Captain hero: as the
mini-troopers tore super
nanny limb from limb,
433
00:20:14,481 --> 00:20:18,317
I couldn't help but think
that there was very little
point to this nonsense,
434
00:20:18,351 --> 00:20:21,186
But if there's any
semblance of a lesson here,
435
00:20:21,221 --> 00:20:24,790
It's that just because
someone has the word "super"
in front of their name,
436
00:20:24,824 --> 00:20:27,026
That doesn't
make them super.
437
00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:29,728
On the other hand,
if you put "le"
in front of a word,
438
00:20:29,763 --> 00:20:31,397
It does make it classy.
439
00:20:31,431 --> 00:20:34,767
Like lesbian,
the classiest women
of them all.
440
00:20:34,801 --> 00:20:37,302
Looks like you kids
have this under control.
441
00:20:37,337 --> 00:20:38,303
Hyah!
442
00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:40,706
[crash]
443
00:20:40,740 --> 00:20:43,842
I'm off to defeat
the evil supercuts!
444
00:20:47,947 --> 00:20:51,283
You win this time,
supercuts!
445
00:20:51,317 --> 00:20:54,253
Captioned by the national
captioning institute
--www.Ncicap.Org--
446
00:20:55,305 --> 00:21:55,173
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