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♪ Last King Christmas
last arrived ♪
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♪ On the Christmas Christmas ♪
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Mmm.
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Jerry, you are really
giving it to this ham.
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Um, Merry Christmas.
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Hello?
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My parents are coming over
for the first time in years.
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Can we stow the
gadgets and look alive?
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Alive?
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For your parents?
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Mm, good one.
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Hey, man! You "Hey, man!"
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This holiday is about humanity.
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You know, I thought it was
about being born half-god or something.
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Whatever.
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All electronic items are going
in the stocking... now.
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Dad, I'm not
giving you my phone.
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Put it in the stocking, Summer,
or I'm joining Facebook.
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A-ho, ho, ho, everybody.
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More like
"Whoa, whoa, whoa."
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What is this?
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My parents are coming!
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Calm down, Jerry.
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This is Reuben, an old friend.
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Pearl Harbor.
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I check in on him once a year
and give him a little
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medical evaluation.
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Aww!
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Dad, that is so sweet!
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Yeah, it is.
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I don't get it.
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Korea.
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Don't worry about your
C-Christmas, Jerry.
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I'll be with Reuben in
my workshop while you guys are
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having another day in
Phil Collins' proverbial paradise.
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Huh.
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You think you know a guy.
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Okay, there's my parents.
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Now, remember...
No TV, no phones, no laptops.
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We are connecting this Christmas,
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like old-school
Jews on a Saturday.
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Hey, hey!
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Merry Christmas, son.
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Uh, hi.
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Can I help you?
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Jerry, this is Jacob.
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Didn't you get our text message?
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No!
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You must be Jerry.
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That's a fine-looking apron.
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Williams-Sonoma?
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I wish!
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But thank you.
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So, you're a...
friend of the family?
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Uh, the way we see it,
he's a part of the family.
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Wow.
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After your father's brush with
cancer and losing your uncle,
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we looked at life and wondered,
how have we spent it,
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and how do we spend
the rest of it?
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What are we going to
be when we die...
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A list of fears and questions
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or a collection
of real experiences?
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Holy crap.
Joyce, that's amazing.
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Then Jacob came into our lives,
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and... we're learning
to live again.
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All three of us.
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Cool.
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Eggnog?
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Now we are talking!
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This man's got the apron
and the eggnog, huh?
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Hi, Joyce. Leonard.
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Hello, there.
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Merry Christmas, man.
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Morty, a moment of your time?
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He's in bad shape, Morty.
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Aw, geez, Rick.
What'd you do?
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Gee, thanks, Morty.
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W-w-what kind of monster
do you think I am?
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I-I-I'm sitting here trying
to save the guy's life.
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I need your help.
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I want you to find
Dr. Xenon Bloom.
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He'll know what's going on.
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Uh, w-w-w-where...
Where do I find Dr. Bloom?
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In Reuben.
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Reuben, Minne... Minnesota?
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Reuben on the table, Morty.
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Look, I-I-I I don't
have time for you to wrap your
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little walnut around everything.
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Just hold your breath
until the process is over
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or your lungs will collapse.
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What proc...
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Hey, Dad, where's Morty?
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He's busy.
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Morty, can you hear me?
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Head north.
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Rick, where am I?
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Depending on my aim,
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you should be just
south of the entrance.
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Entrance to what?
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Welcome, Morty.
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Welcome...
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...to Anatomy Park!
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It's a little business venture
I've been cooking up on the side
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with Dr. Bloom... an amusement
park inside a human body.
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Science isn't ch...
cheap, Morty.
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This should really help
put a dent in the overhead.
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Oh, my God!
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This is insane!
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Spleen Mountain?
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Bladder Falls?
Pirates of the Pancreas?
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You got a problem
with that last one, Morty?
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Huh? No, no.
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I'm just reading 'em out loud in
the order that I'm seeing 'em.
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Okay. All right.
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If I sounded a little defensive,
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it's because Pirates of the
Pancreas was my baby.
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You know, I got...
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I got a lot of pushback
when I pitched it, Morty.
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I guess I'm still
a little defensive.
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Let's just find Dr. Bloom,
all right?
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I-I'm picking up a distress
signal in the liver, Morty.
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Proceed to the liver.
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Arriving at...
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...liver.
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Ow!
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Mind the gap.
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It's really scary in here, Rick.
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The liver's under maintenance.
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Reuben's seen some
rough years, Morty.
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Don't judge.
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You don't agree to have a theme
park built inside you if your
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life's going great.
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Rick! It's a monster!
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No, no, no. Morty.
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The only monster here is
alco......holism.
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That is an animatronic werewolf.
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Who are you?!
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Answer me!
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Where'd you come from?
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My... my... my
grandpa Rick sent me!
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Poncho!
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That's quite enough.
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Morty, that's Poncho.
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This is Roger and Annie.
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And I am Dr. Xenon Bloom.
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Hey, Bloom, it's Rick.
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What the hell's going on here?
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I don't know why, but the entire
security system has shut down,
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and I'm afraid...
the exhibits are unlocked.
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Exhibits?
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Anatomy Park's greatest
attraction, young man,
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isn't the music
or the food or the...
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Pirates of the Pancreas.
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Watch it.
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It is, first and foremost, a
living museum of humanity's most
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noble and ferocious diseases.
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Diseases?
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Hey, doc.
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I got news for you.
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Your living museum is
officially a wild safari!
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Hepatitis A!
Run!
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Oh, the food goes
in your mouth, girl.
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Oh, Jacob.
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I-I'm sorry, Jacob.
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I-I guess I'm still confused
about the precise nature and
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origin of your relationship
with my parents.
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Are you, like, uh... are you,
like, their caretaker?
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Is that what it is?
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We can go into
detail later, son.
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Now, wait.
Th-there's no point to secrecy.
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Let's all live and die honestly.
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Your mother and I have shared
40 years of each other, mind,
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body, and soul, and when
minds and souls are joined
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for eternity and when eternity
is at the door,
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it's an invitation to let go of
the body and an opportunity
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to share and experiment.
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Dad, please.
What are you saying?
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Whatever it is, it's beautiful,
Leonard, and we support you.
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Hey, speak for yourself,
because it
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Sounds like you're about
to say Jacob is your lover.
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No, no, no, no, no, no.
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Jacob is your mother's lover.
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I watch them...
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Sometimes from a chair and
sometimes from a closet,
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almost always dressed
as Superman.
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Oh.
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Jerry, this ham has got
to be all you, right?
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It's incredible.
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Happy human holiday, Dad.
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Aah!
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Hepatitis won't follow us
into the respiratory system.
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That's strange.
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Airflow is down 20%.
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So, the brain isn't
getting enough oxygen.
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That's why security's offline.
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Well, I guess we
better check it out.
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Hey! Wait for me!
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Put that back on!
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If we got up to the
Bronchial Catwalk,
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we could look for a blockage.
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I'll go.
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00:07:18,689 --> 00:07:19,899
Don't be a hero, kid.
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I'm not.
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I'm doing it because it's fun.
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We shouldn't be here.
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Whatever you do, do not
fire that thing in here.
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We must save Reuben.
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This is my life's work.
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It's all right, my dear.
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Nearly all human lungs contain a
strain of these bacteria,
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but the scar tissue
keeps them...
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dormant.
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00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:42,672
Morty, get down!
214
00:07:42,755 --> 00:07:43,756
Whoa-ho-ho!
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00:07:43,840 --> 00:07:45,007
Whoa!
216
00:07:46,217 --> 00:07:47,343
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
217
00:07:50,263 --> 00:07:52,306
Oh, what are those things?
218
00:07:52,390 --> 00:07:54,684
Tuberculosis...
Coming in fast!
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00:07:54,767 --> 00:07:56,227
Not faster than a bullet!
220
00:07:56,310 --> 00:07:57,520
Aah!
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00:07:57,603 --> 00:07:58,521
No!
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00:07:58,604 --> 00:07:59,897
Do you know what you've done?!
223
00:08:01,149 --> 00:08:03,484
Whoa!
224
00:08:05,194 --> 00:08:06,529
Get to the digestive tract!
225
00:08:06,612 --> 00:08:07,613
He's coughing!
226
00:08:09,031 --> 00:08:10,533
Whoaaaa!
227
00:08:10,616 --> 00:08:11,993
Don't let me die!
228
00:08:12,076 --> 00:08:13,411
Just take a deep breath, Reuben.
229
00:08:14,662 --> 00:08:15,662
You're not gonna die!
230
00:08:15,705 --> 00:08:16,705
What's your name?
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00:08:16,747 --> 00:08:17,790
My name is...
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00:08:18,916 --> 00:08:20,209
Alexand...
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00:08:24,255 --> 00:08:26,090
Rick... R-R-Reuben's got
tuberculosis!
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00:08:26,174 --> 00:08:27,258
Oh, great work, Morty.
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00:08:27,341 --> 00:08:29,010
Okay, I'll just
cure it and then...
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Okay.
237
00:08:31,679 --> 00:08:32,889
Well, I can't cure death.
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00:08:32,972 --> 00:08:34,015
This is bad, Morty.
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00:08:34,098 --> 00:08:35,200
You're trapped in a dead man.
240
00:08:35,224 --> 00:08:36,743
Listen, if the situation
keeps darkening,
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00:08:36,767 --> 00:08:39,520
do yourself a favor and pop by
Pirates of the Pancreas.
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00:08:39,604 --> 00:08:41,856
Obviously I'm biased,
but I think it's great, Morty.
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It's a bunch of
pirates running around a
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pancreas.
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00:08:46,235 --> 00:08:47,629
We don't whitewash it,
either, Morty.
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00:08:47,653 --> 00:08:49,155
I mean, the pirates
are really rapey.
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The top priority is to get,
you know, you guys out of there,
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00:08:52,158 --> 00:08:54,261
but I'm just saying, if that
becomes impossible, please,
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00:08:54,285 --> 00:08:55,828
you gotta treat yourself.
250
00:08:56,162 --> 00:08:57,162
Oh, man.
251
00:08:57,205 --> 00:08:58,956
W-w-w-what is
that horrible smell?
252
00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:00,166
You mean the Panda Express?
253
00:09:01,417 --> 00:09:03,085
Kidding. I-I'm kidding.
254
00:09:03,169 --> 00:09:06,422
The body is beginning to
constrict and fill with gas.
255
00:09:06,505 --> 00:09:08,132
We're inside a corpse, my boy.
256
00:09:08,216 --> 00:09:10,259
Anatomy Park is doomed.
257
00:09:10,343 --> 00:09:11,594
Forget about the park, doctor!
258
00:09:11,677 --> 00:09:12,803
How do we get out?
259
00:09:12,887 --> 00:09:14,889
The digestive tract is the
evacuation route.
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00:09:14,972 --> 00:09:16,390
Get it?
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00:09:16,474 --> 00:09:18,660
There's an emergency station in
the colon with a ray that can
262
00:09:18,684 --> 00:09:20,061
enlarge us all.
263
00:09:20,144 --> 00:09:21,562
Everybody, head for the colon!
264
00:09:21,646 --> 00:09:24,690
Now I'm taking orders
from a 12-year-old boy?
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00:09:24,774 --> 00:09:29,403
Morty, the scar sacs containing
the tuberculosis were sabotaged.
266
00:09:29,487 --> 00:09:31,572
This disaster was an inside job.
267
00:09:31,656 --> 00:09:33,574
Keep your eye on Annie.
268
00:09:33,658 --> 00:09:35,743
She was written up several times
269
00:09:35,826 --> 00:09:38,871
by her manager
at the Churro Stand.
270
00:09:38,955 --> 00:09:40,766
Intestines are ahead to the
left, then to the right,
271
00:09:40,790 --> 00:09:43,251
then left, et cetera.
272
00:09:45,002 --> 00:09:47,755
Hey, just so you know,
I-I-I'm actually 14.
273
00:09:47,838 --> 00:09:49,215
So, you know...
what?
274
00:09:49,298 --> 00:09:50,758
Not 12.
275
00:09:50,841 --> 00:09:52,218
Okay.
276
00:09:52,301 --> 00:09:54,845
You know, because
he just said I was 12.
277
00:09:54,929 --> 00:09:56,222
Oh.
278
00:09:56,305 --> 00:09:57,807
Good for you.
279
00:09:57,890 --> 00:09:59,558
Oof. Ugh. Morty.
280
00:09:59,642 --> 00:10:00,893
Strike one.
281
00:10:03,646 --> 00:10:05,398
♪ It's a road of wonder ♪
282
00:10:05,481 --> 00:10:07,108
♪ A trail of food ♪
283
00:10:07,191 --> 00:10:10,987
♪ It's a pathway to break
up the bad and good ♪
284
00:10:11,070 --> 00:10:15,032
♪ It's a tube that digests
and then sends out the rest ♪
285
00:10:15,116 --> 00:10:19,120
♪ It's a small,
small intestine ♪
286
00:10:19,203 --> 00:10:21,789
It goes on like this for miles.
287
00:10:21,872 --> 00:10:24,208
Then we get to the
large intestine!
288
00:10:25,543 --> 00:10:27,336
Shh!
I hear something.
289
00:10:31,173 --> 00:10:32,383
Don't move.
290
00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:36,220
Gonorrhea can't see
us if we don't move.
291
00:10:38,764 --> 00:10:39,640
Wait, I was wrong.
292
00:10:39,724 --> 00:10:40,804
I was thinking of a T. Rex.
293
00:10:42,893 --> 00:10:44,353
Move!
294
00:10:47,857 --> 00:10:49,233
We're sitting ducks!
295
00:10:49,317 --> 00:10:51,295
Doc, didn't you say that the
body was filling with gas?
296
00:10:51,319 --> 00:10:52,611
Yes. Why?
297
00:10:52,695 --> 00:10:54,572
Kid, you're a genius.
298
00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:55,656
Are you mad?!
299
00:10:55,740 --> 00:10:56,949
Everybody, in here!
300
00:10:58,242 --> 00:10:59,368
Hey, Gonorrhea!
301
00:10:59,452 --> 00:11:01,912
How's this for a
burning sensation?
302
00:11:08,836 --> 00:11:10,046
Huh.
303
00:11:11,881 --> 00:11:14,216
♪ Drummer drum drum
drum drum drum ♪
304
00:11:14,300 --> 00:11:16,260
♪ Drum drum drum
drum drum drum ♪
305
00:11:16,344 --> 00:11:17,261
♪ Christmas drums ♪
306
00:11:17,345 --> 00:11:18,512
Oh, sing it, Summer.
307
00:11:18,596 --> 00:11:20,723
♪ Christmas drums being played
by a b-o-o-o-y ♪
308
00:11:20,806 --> 00:11:22,016
Oh, I love to hear you sing.
309
00:11:24,935 --> 00:11:26,062
Jerry, come on.
310
00:11:26,145 --> 00:11:27,271
This is what you wanted.
311
00:11:27,355 --> 00:11:28,355
I get it, Beth.
312
00:11:28,397 --> 00:11:29,557
Be careful what you wish for.
313
00:11:29,607 --> 00:11:31,233
I'm being punished
for taking your iPad.
314
00:11:31,317 --> 00:11:32,193
What?
315
00:11:32,276 --> 00:11:33,694
Jerry, let that stuff go, okay?
316
00:11:33,778 --> 00:11:35,237
I'm sorry I was a bitch earlier.
317
00:11:35,321 --> 00:11:37,281
Let's just be here.
318
00:11:37,365 --> 00:11:39,283
Summer!
319
00:11:39,367 --> 00:11:40,284
Ethan?
320
00:11:40,368 --> 00:11:41,368
What are you doing here?
321
00:11:41,410 --> 00:11:42,471
I've been texting you for hours!
322
00:11:42,495 --> 00:11:43,621
What the hell?!
323
00:11:43,704 --> 00:11:44,622
I don't have my phone!
324
00:11:44,705 --> 00:11:46,165
I'm doing a human holiday!
325
00:11:46,248 --> 00:11:48,959
Well, did you even consider
how that might make me feel?!
326
00:11:49,043 --> 00:11:50,211
How you feel?!
327
00:11:50,294 --> 00:11:52,546
Why is everything always
happening to you?!
328
00:11:52,630 --> 00:11:54,465
Summer, do you have a boyfriend?
329
00:11:54,548 --> 00:11:56,008
Yeah, do you, Summer?
330
00:11:56,092 --> 00:11:56,884
I don't know, Ethan.
331
00:11:56,967 --> 00:11:58,094
Do I?!
332
00:11:58,177 --> 00:12:00,971
Jerry, no disrespect,
but you really need to
333
00:12:01,055 --> 00:12:02,973
connect more with
your family, man.
334
00:12:04,517 --> 00:12:06,370
I should be able to access the
backup generator to get the
335
00:12:06,394 --> 00:12:07,686
growth ray online.
336
00:12:07,770 --> 00:12:09,790
If it works, we'll be
regular-sized in a few minutes.
337
00:12:09,814 --> 00:12:11,894
I just hope Reuben's not in a
room with white carpets
338
00:12:11,941 --> 00:12:12,941
or upholstery.
339
00:12:13,984 --> 00:12:15,361
What the hell is that?
340
00:12:15,444 --> 00:12:16,570
The Sphincter Dam.
341
00:12:16,654 --> 00:12:18,406
We built it when Reuben became
incontinent,
342
00:12:18,489 --> 00:12:21,283
but it was not designed
to hold a corpse load.
343
00:12:22,368 --> 00:12:23,285
I've almost got it.
344
00:12:23,369 --> 00:12:25,121
Everybody, move
inside the circle.
345
00:12:26,455 --> 00:12:27,331
Poncho?
346
00:12:27,415 --> 00:12:28,624
What is this in your backpack?
347
00:12:28,707 --> 00:12:30,960
That's Bubonic plague!
348
00:12:31,043 --> 00:12:32,483
What are you doing
with that, Poncho?
349
00:12:33,421 --> 00:12:34,421
Everybody, get back!
350
00:12:34,463 --> 00:12:35,881
Poncho, you son of a bitch!
351
00:12:35,965 --> 00:12:39,260
You released the tuberculosis
so you could steal from me?
352
00:12:39,343 --> 00:12:40,678
That's right, baby.
353
00:12:40,761 --> 00:12:42,888
A lot of people
would pay top dollar
354
00:12:42,972 --> 00:12:44,849
to decimate the population.
355
00:12:44,932 --> 00:12:46,267
I'll take the highest bidder...
356
00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:48,102
Al-Qaeda, North Korea,
357
00:12:48,185 --> 00:12:51,313
Republicans, Shriners, balding
men that work out,
358
00:12:51,397 --> 00:12:54,316
people on the internet that are
only turned on by cartoons
359
00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:56,026
of Japanese teenagers...
360
00:12:56,110 --> 00:13:00,531
Anything is better than working
for you, you pompous, negligent,
361
00:13:00,614 --> 00:13:04,827
iTunes-gift-card-as-a-holiday-
bonus-giving mother...
362
00:13:07,329 --> 00:13:08,581
Come on!
363
00:13:11,876 --> 00:13:12,710
Aah!
364
00:13:12,793 --> 00:13:13,586
Get off!
365
00:13:17,423 --> 00:13:18,257
You guys!
366
00:13:18,340 --> 00:13:19,592
It's gonna burst! Go!
367
00:13:19,675 --> 00:13:20,551
Go, go, go!
368
00:13:23,345 --> 00:13:24,180
My foot is stuck.
369
00:13:24,263 --> 00:13:25,723
No! It's okay!
370
00:13:25,806 --> 00:13:27,808
It's okay. Just go.
Tell my family I love them.
371
00:13:27,892 --> 00:13:29,911
They may be hard to find 'cause
my wife kept her last name and
372
00:13:29,935 --> 00:13:32,375
she made the kids take it, too,
so, I-I don't know, you can...
373
00:13:32,438 --> 00:13:33,856
No!
374
00:13:37,526 --> 00:13:39,528
Let me ask you a question,
Ethan.
375
00:13:39,612 --> 00:13:41,405
Where's the anger
coming from, man?
376
00:13:41,489 --> 00:13:44,158
From Summer being a total bitch!
377
00:13:44,241 --> 00:13:49,079
Where's the anger coming from?
378
00:13:49,163 --> 00:13:52,666
My brother... took me fishing
once... in the bushes...
379
00:13:54,084 --> 00:13:55,353
I can't... I can't...
380
00:13:56,420 --> 00:13:58,005
He made me feel like a girl!
381
00:13:58,088 --> 00:14:00,382
I... he made me a girl!
382
00:14:01,634 --> 00:14:03,552
He didn't make
you anything, man.
383
00:14:03,636 --> 00:14:05,429
You are who you are.
384
00:14:05,513 --> 00:14:07,181
She is who she is.
385
00:14:07,264 --> 00:14:09,517
Now, you go to her... brand-new.
386
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:10,601
Come here, right now.
387
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:11,560
Oh, my God.
388
00:14:11,644 --> 00:14:12,895
I'm so sorry, Ethan!
389
00:14:12,978 --> 00:14:14,021
I love you!
390
00:14:14,104 --> 00:14:14,939
I love you so much.
391
00:14:16,649 --> 00:14:17,983
Um...
392
00:14:18,067 --> 00:14:19,818
You did it again, cubbie.
393
00:14:19,902 --> 00:14:20,986
Come here.
394
00:14:25,533 --> 00:14:27,743
No! Stop! I hate this!
395
00:14:27,826 --> 00:14:30,788
Well, Christmas doesn't revolve
around what you hate, son.
396
00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:32,122
Well, then I hate Christmas!
397
00:14:32,206 --> 00:14:33,541
Enjoy being human!
398
00:14:33,624 --> 00:14:35,251
You guys are gross and lame.
399
00:14:35,334 --> 00:14:37,419
My name's Reuben Ridley.
400
00:14:37,503 --> 00:14:40,548
You're inside me right now, but
by the end of this journey...
401
00:14:40,631 --> 00:14:41,631
Whoopsie.
402
00:14:41,674 --> 00:14:43,926
I'll be inside all of you.
403
00:14:44,009 --> 00:14:45,928
My story begins during
404
00:14:46,011 --> 00:14:48,347
the dot-com crash
in the early '90s.
405
00:14:49,974 --> 00:14:52,059
You can put your fingers
wherever you want.
406
00:14:52,142 --> 00:14:54,120
Morty, you want to put it
on mute or something?
407
00:14:54,144 --> 00:14:55,479
I'm... I'm trying to
concentrate.
408
00:14:55,563 --> 00:14:56,480
Uh... Rick?
409
00:14:56,564 --> 00:14:57,815
Not now, Jerry.
410
00:14:57,898 --> 00:14:59,584
I've got much,
much smaller fish to fry.
411
00:14:59,608 --> 00:15:01,360
I wanted to say I'm sorry
I ever judged you.
412
00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:03,612
Right now,
you're my sanest relative.
413
00:15:03,696 --> 00:15:05,364
Relative.
414
00:15:05,447 --> 00:15:06,574
R-relative size!
415
00:15:06,657 --> 00:15:08,426
Jerry, hand me a scalpel
and a bundle of dynamite.
416
00:15:08,450 --> 00:15:09,761
Morty, can you get
to the left nipple?
417
00:15:09,785 --> 00:15:11,036
Are you kidding?
418
00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:12,681
I'm hoping I can get
to both of 'em, Rick.
419
00:15:12,705 --> 00:15:14,558
No, Morty, I'm talking about
Reuben's left nipple.
420
00:15:16,959 --> 00:15:18,270
We need to get
to the left nipple!
421
00:15:18,294 --> 00:15:19,962
The body is decaying.
422
00:15:20,045 --> 00:15:22,298
The arterial transit
system is useless.
423
00:15:22,381 --> 00:15:24,174
We can try the service shuttle.
424
00:15:24,258 --> 00:15:25,738
It's connected to
the skeletal system.
425
00:15:25,801 --> 00:15:27,761
That's why we call
it the bone train.
426
00:15:27,845 --> 00:15:30,889
Would you like to ride
the bone train, Miss?
427
00:15:30,973 --> 00:15:32,516
If it'll get us out of here.
428
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:34,101
How about you, Morty?
429
00:15:34,184 --> 00:15:37,062
Would you like to
ride the bone train?
430
00:15:37,146 --> 00:15:38,355
Why are you doing this bit?
431
00:15:38,439 --> 00:15:40,065
We're gonna die! Let's go!
432
00:15:42,151 --> 00:15:45,070
Well... I can see you're busy.
433
00:15:45,154 --> 00:15:46,488
Merry Christmas, Rick.
434
00:15:49,950 --> 00:15:51,368
There's no autopilot.
435
00:15:51,452 --> 00:15:54,580
One of us will have to stay
here and operate it manually.
436
00:15:59,918 --> 00:16:01,798
- Uh, well...
- No, you're... you're right.
437
00:16:01,879 --> 00:16:03,922
I-It was a dick move for me
to even pause like that.
438
00:16:04,006 --> 00:16:05,049
This is all my fault.
439
00:16:05,132 --> 00:16:06,425
You go on.
440
00:16:07,468 --> 00:16:08,468
What the hell is that?
441
00:16:08,510 --> 00:16:09,803
E. Coli outbreak.
442
00:16:09,887 --> 00:16:10,721
Hurry!
443
00:16:13,057 --> 00:16:15,017
Wait, there is an autopilot.
444
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,685
Wait!
445
00:16:16,769 --> 00:16:18,270
It's okay! Never mind!
446
00:16:18,354 --> 00:16:21,148
I wanted to sacrifice
myself anyway!
447
00:16:24,151 --> 00:16:25,911
They're... they're chewing
through the doors!
448
00:16:27,029 --> 00:16:28,405
We're in the areola, Rick...
449
00:16:28,489 --> 00:16:31,700
Almost to the nipple, but we're
also in a really bad situation!
450
00:16:31,784 --> 00:16:33,452
I'm almost there, Morty!
451
00:16:43,671 --> 00:16:45,881
Reports from all over the
country have been coming in
452
00:16:45,964 --> 00:16:48,258
about what appears
to be a giant,
453
00:16:48,342 --> 00:16:51,595
naked man over the
continental United States.
454
00:16:51,679 --> 00:16:54,056
We now go to Tom Randolph
in New York. Tom?
455
00:16:54,139 --> 00:16:57,309
Well, the eyes aren't twinkling
and the dimples aren't merry,
456
00:16:57,393 --> 00:17:01,313
but I'm standing under a
nose like a 70-mile cherry.
457
00:17:01,397 --> 00:17:02,523
Thank you, Tom.
458
00:17:02,606 --> 00:17:05,192
Let's go now to Eric McMahan
in Los Angeles.
459
00:17:05,275 --> 00:17:07,194
We've got feet here on
the West Coast, Bill...
460
00:17:07,277 --> 00:17:08,654
Giant feet,
461
00:17:08,737 --> 00:17:10,698
even relative to the
giant man's size,
462
00:17:10,781 --> 00:17:13,450
and you know what
they say about that.
463
00:17:13,534 --> 00:17:15,536
Well, if the old adage is true,
464
00:17:15,619 --> 00:17:20,708
one can only wonder what's going
down in the Rocky Mountains.
465
00:17:21,834 --> 00:17:22,835
Wha?
466
00:17:32,845 --> 00:17:34,263
Oh my God, the track!
467
00:17:34,346 --> 00:17:35,639
It's Hepatitis A!
468
00:17:35,723 --> 00:17:37,182
Aaaah!
469
00:17:52,573 --> 00:17:54,116
The nipple hole.
470
00:17:54,199 --> 00:17:56,368
It's beautiful.
471
00:18:03,208 --> 00:18:04,126
Oh, no!
472
00:18:04,209 --> 00:18:05,711
Holy crap!
473
00:18:08,338 --> 00:18:10,090
Whoa! It's Hepatitis C!
474
00:18:15,137 --> 00:18:16,221
Um... wait...
475
00:18:16,305 --> 00:18:18,766
Did we have some sort of
relationship with him?
476
00:18:18,849 --> 00:18:20,267
I think they're just like that?
477
00:18:20,350 --> 00:18:22,144
I think they're just good guys.
478
00:18:22,227 --> 00:18:24,646
Oh. Huh.
479
00:18:24,730 --> 00:18:26,064
Where's Dr. Bloom?
480
00:18:26,148 --> 00:18:27,691
I'm sorry, Rick, but he's dead.
481
00:18:27,775 --> 00:18:28,817
God damn it, Morty.
482
00:18:28,901 --> 00:18:30,652
I ask you to do one thing!
483
00:18:40,913 --> 00:18:42,348
Jerry doesn't know
what he's missing.
484
00:18:42,372 --> 00:18:43,707
He'll come around, Beth.
485
00:18:43,791 --> 00:18:45,292
Christmas is a special time.
486
00:18:45,375 --> 00:18:47,419
It has funny ways of
bringing families together.
487
00:18:47,503 --> 00:18:48,837
I don't know, Jacob.
488
00:18:48,921 --> 00:18:51,965
Jerry got an invitation to be
alive today, and he rejected it.
489
00:18:52,049 --> 00:18:54,510
I don't know if
our marriage will...
490
00:18:58,639 --> 00:18:59,681
It's raining blood!
491
00:18:59,765 --> 00:19:00,891
Oh, shit. Find Jerry.
492
00:19:00,974 --> 00:19:01,892
Oh, God.
493
00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:03,727
Jerry!
It's all right.
494
00:19:03,811 --> 00:19:05,729
The TV says there's
nothing to worry about.
495
00:19:05,813 --> 00:19:08,649
The giant, naked sky
Santa has exploded.
496
00:19:08,732 --> 00:19:12,194
Blood and chunks of viscera are
raining down on the country.
497
00:19:12,277 --> 00:19:14,196
Everything should be fine.
498
00:19:15,322 --> 00:19:16,323
Oh, yes.
499
00:19:16,406 --> 00:19:17,699
Dad, can I have my phone back?
500
00:19:17,783 --> 00:19:19,201
A sure, sweetie. Here.
501
00:19:19,284 --> 00:19:21,620
Everybody, take a device.
502
00:19:21,703 --> 00:19:23,247
It'll help you relax.
503
00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:24,331
This is nice.
504
00:19:24,414 --> 00:19:25,707
Yeah.
505
00:19:25,791 --> 00:19:28,585
Look, I guess we really learned
something this Christmas, Jacob.
506
00:19:28,669 --> 00:19:29,753
No, we didn't, Dad.
507
00:19:29,837 --> 00:19:31,672
No, we didn't.
508
00:19:33,423 --> 00:19:34,716
Too bad about Dr. Bloom.
509
00:19:34,800 --> 00:19:35,968
He was a genius...
510
00:19:36,051 --> 00:19:38,303
The only man capable of
creating a new Anatomy Park.
511
00:19:38,387 --> 00:19:40,889
Actually, I studied
Dr. Bloom's work.
512
00:19:40,973 --> 00:19:43,183
I-I-I-I believe I have the
knowledge necessary to create
513
00:19:43,267 --> 00:19:44,977
an entirely new,
much safer park.
514
00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:46,060
What about...
515
00:19:46,103 --> 00:19:47,396
Pirates of the Pancreas?
516
00:19:47,479 --> 00:19:49,898
I think it was one of the
most underrated attractions.
517
00:19:49,982 --> 00:19:52,484
Boo-yah!
Hold your breath.
518
00:19:52,568 --> 00:19:54,653
Hey, w-w-what the hell,
Rick?!
519
00:19:54,736 --> 00:19:56,655
What the hell, man! I liked her!
520
00:19:56,738 --> 00:19:58,615
I really had something
going there, Rick!
521
00:19:58,699 --> 00:19:59,950
Yeah, so I heard.
522
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:01,761
you dodged a bullet,
Morty... trust me.
523
00:20:01,785 --> 00:20:03,495
Puffy vagina.
524
00:20:03,579 --> 00:20:04,830
W-what's wrong with that?
525
00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:06,432
That doesn't sound
like a problem to me.
526
00:20:06,456 --> 00:20:07,624
I don't know.
527
00:20:07,708 --> 00:20:08,852
Come on,
let's get some stuffing.
528
00:20:08,876 --> 00:20:10,252
I'm starving.
529
00:20:12,254 --> 00:20:13,547
Oh, unbelievable.
530
00:20:13,630 --> 00:20:15,924
We got... we got a bunch of
robot, computer people,
531
00:20:16,008 --> 00:20:18,677
sitting around with their faces
stuffed into computer screens.
532
00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:20,804
Do you guys realize that
Christ was born today?
533
00:20:20,888 --> 00:20:24,349
Jesus Christ, our savior,
was born today.
534
00:20:24,433 --> 00:20:26,018
Are... are... are
you people even human?
535
00:20:26,101 --> 00:20:28,061
What kind of Christmas is this?
536
00:20:59,051 --> 00:21:00,969
Hey, Rick? Rick, can you hear me?
537
00:21:01,053 --> 00:21:01,845
Loud and clear, Annie.
538
00:21:01,929 --> 00:21:02,846
Great.
539
00:21:02,930 --> 00:21:04,782
We're also on with Alejandro,
our Chief Imaginarian.
540
00:21:04,806 --> 00:21:05,849
Hey, Rick.
541
00:21:05,933 --> 00:21:08,202
Natalie Jacobs and Chris Deseter
from Microscopic Marketing,
542
00:21:08,226 --> 00:21:10,854
Zack from Organ Concepts,
and Jamie from New Media.
543
00:21:10,938 --> 00:21:12,230
Hey, everybody.
544
00:21:12,314 --> 00:21:13,333
Hi, how's it going? Hi, Rick.
545
00:21:13,357 --> 00:21:14,816
So, Pirates of the Pancreas.
546
00:21:14,900 --> 00:21:15,900
Yeah. Talk to me.
547
00:21:15,943 --> 00:21:17,402
Hey, Rick.
It's Alejandro speaking.
548
00:21:17,486 --> 00:21:20,656
Um, so, we asked ourselves,
internally...
549
00:21:20,739 --> 00:21:21,990
We asked ourselves over here,
550
00:21:22,074 --> 00:21:23,992
"Okay, what does
a pancreas do?"
551
00:21:24,076 --> 00:21:26,662
and the answer was,
"Does it make pirates?"
552
00:21:26,745 --> 00:21:28,789
No, it makes insulin, you know?
553
00:21:28,872 --> 00:21:30,540
So, we're starting with a new...
554
00:21:30,624 --> 00:21:33,001
Those guys are inside me, huh?
555
00:21:33,085 --> 00:21:34,753
Like, building a park?
556
00:21:34,836 --> 00:21:36,814
Those guys are inside you
building a piece of shit, Ethan!
557
00:21:36,838 --> 00:21:38,650
They're inside you building
a monument to compromise!
558
00:21:38,674 --> 00:21:40,300
Fuck 'em.
559
00:21:40,384 --> 00:21:41,384
Fuck those people.
560
00:21:41,426 --> 00:21:43,971
Fuck this whole thing, Ethan.
561
00:21:44,054 --> 00:21:45,514
Cool.
562
00:21:45,597 --> 00:21:46,597
And who pays me?
563
00:21:48,433 --> 00:21:49,810
Did you get any of that?
564
00:21:49,893 --> 00:21:51,728
It's a good-a show!