1
00:00:20,583 --> 00:00:23,296
Who took my Lemoy CD
2
00:00:34,589 --> 00:00:37,560
NATURE VS. NURTURE
3
00:00:42,668 --> 00:00:44,146
Surrender, Chode!
4
00:00:44,220 --> 00:00:47,250
And I will spare the lives of you
and your crew!
5
00:00:47,348 --> 00:00:48,335
You will?
6
00:00:48,365 --> 00:00:49,846
Of course not!
7
00:00:53,281 --> 00:00:54,196
By the way,
8
00:00:54,274 --> 00:00:56,653
what do you people think of that evil laugh?
9
00:00:56,731 --> 00:00:59,816
I've been working on it
but I'm not sure it's there yet.
10
00:00:59,834 --> 00:01:01,625
Frankly it stinks!
11
00:01:02,362 --> 00:01:06,018
- I didn't buy it.
- It sounded forced. Amateurish.
12
00:01:06,092 --> 00:01:06,951
Pretty hokey.
13
00:01:06,989 --> 00:01:08,682
I told you I wasn't ready!
14
00:01:08,707 --> 00:01:11,946
You people are a useless bunch of sycophants!
15
00:01:11,986 --> 00:01:15,495
And I'm sick! Sick of it I tell you!
16
00:01:15,558 --> 00:01:17,619
Hello?! Mr. Hissy fit?
17
00:01:17,668 --> 00:01:19,116
Could we just finish up here?
18
00:01:19,239 --> 00:01:22,012
Oh, you're finished alright.
19
00:01:22,128 --> 00:01:23,639
Before you blow up my ship,
20
00:01:23,683 --> 00:01:26,661
at least let me release
my precious cargo to you.
21
00:01:26,750 --> 00:01:29,105
Precious cargo? What is it?
22
00:01:29,173 --> 00:01:31,818
You know how you love ice cream...
23
00:01:31,929 --> 00:01:34,884
Oooh! Gimme it! Gimme it! Gimme it!
24
00:01:34,951 --> 00:01:37,640
Well, this ice cream is photon-torpedo flavored.
25
00:01:41,702 --> 00:01:44,013
I'll get you Chode...
26
00:01:49,518 --> 00:01:51,140
Captain, we've only winged them.
27
00:01:51,207 --> 00:01:52,985
As soon as they recover, they'll come after us.
28
00:01:53,038 --> 00:01:55,104
Right. Warp speed, Bob!
29
00:01:55,142 --> 00:01:58,297
Does anyone hear my
"something's horribly wrong" alarm?
30
00:01:58,319 --> 00:02:00,373
Or has everyone gone deaf?
31
00:02:00,595 --> 00:02:02,329
We have damage to the warp drive,
32
00:02:02,351 --> 00:02:05,240
we're going to have to head
for the nearest planet for repairs.
33
00:02:05,306 --> 00:02:06,951
The closest planet is Muldavia 5.
34
00:02:06,995 --> 00:02:10,730
Is that the planet where the women
are insatiable nymphomaniacs?!
35
00:02:10,841 --> 00:02:13,508
- No.
- Damn! Where is that planet?!
36
00:02:22,117 --> 00:02:23,784
Wow! So this is Muldavia.
37
00:02:23,860 --> 00:02:26,637
This is the kind of place
I've always dreamed about living in.
38
00:02:26,660 --> 00:02:29,104
One of my sisters lived in Muldavia once.
39
00:02:29,193 --> 00:02:30,038
Which one?
40
00:02:30,103 --> 00:02:31,493
The one I can't stand.
41
00:02:31,566 --> 00:02:34,225
She's pushy, she's loud, and she's a slut...
42
00:02:34,236 --> 00:02:35,821
the exact opposite of me!
43
00:02:35,870 --> 00:02:36,846
Really?
44
00:02:36,968 --> 00:02:39,407
Zip right into that spaceport there, Bob.
45
00:02:39,504 --> 00:02:43,163
Zip? If any one cares,
I can't feel my landing gear.
46
00:03:03,915 --> 00:03:06,476
Don't shoot.
I can explain everything.
47
00:03:08,661 --> 00:03:10,051
What are they doing?
48
00:03:10,100 --> 00:03:12,198
For some reason
they're looking at their shoes.
49
00:03:12,240 --> 00:03:14,232
Maybe it's the way they greet each other.
50
00:03:14,275 --> 00:03:16,362
Everybody, look at your shoes!
51
00:03:19,729 --> 00:03:20,868
Greetings.
52
00:03:20,927 --> 00:03:22,847
Sorry about the cock-eyed landing,
53
00:03:22,848 --> 00:03:24,413
but my ship's on the fritz and..
54
00:03:24,484 --> 00:03:26,618
we will repair it immediately!
55
00:03:32,507 --> 00:03:33,859
Nice try buddy,
56
00:03:33,912 --> 00:03:36,758
but how 'bout a couple of estimates,
I wasn't born yesterday.
57
00:03:36,829 --> 00:03:38,300
There is no charge for the work.
58
00:03:38,359 --> 00:03:41,063
We are honored to have you visit our spacedock.
59
00:03:41,134 --> 00:03:42,865
Honored? To have Chode?
60
00:03:42,936 --> 00:03:45,000
They mustn't get many visitors way out here.
61
00:03:45,059 --> 00:03:46,885
Their behavior is odd.
62
00:03:46,956 --> 00:03:49,232
In the meantime, may we escort you
63
00:03:49,233 --> 00:03:50,798
and your entourage into the city?
64
00:03:50,869 --> 00:03:52,315
By all means.
65
00:03:52,394 --> 00:03:55,809
Maybe we should stay with the ship
in case it's a trick.
66
00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:58,299
Good idea. That's smart.
67
00:03:58,347 --> 00:03:59,841
I meant all of us.
68
00:03:59,900 --> 00:04:03,565
Not me, I wanna find out
what else is free on this planet.
69
00:04:03,873 --> 00:04:06,482
Lead the way, my good man.
70
00:04:12,873 --> 00:04:15,079
What a nice friendly place.
71
00:04:15,180 --> 00:04:17,030
They treat you like a king!
72
00:04:27,655 --> 00:04:29,457
Ok, watch the tentacles.
73
00:04:29,523 --> 00:04:31,207
I'm not gonna steal nothin',
74
00:04:31,254 --> 00:04:33,697
you can check my pockets on the way out.
75
00:04:59,401 --> 00:05:01,583
Hey, what kind of screwy mirror is this?
76
00:05:01,643 --> 00:05:04,251
Brother! At last I've found you!
77
00:05:04,323 --> 00:05:05,817
Whoa! Stay where you are.
78
00:05:05,888 --> 00:05:08,663
You may be good looking,
but I'm not afraid to mess you up.
79
00:05:08,770 --> 00:05:09,955
Don't you see?
80
00:05:10,003 --> 00:05:11,971
You are my long lost twin!
81
00:05:12,037 --> 00:05:16,140
I'm King Regis Philbrick,
ruler of all of Muldavia.
82
00:05:16,211 --> 00:05:17,254
And you are?
83
00:05:17,355 --> 00:05:19,561
Chode.
Commander of jupiter 42.
84
00:05:19,632 --> 00:05:22,312
But to tell you the truth,
I don't see any resemblance.
85
00:05:22,419 --> 00:05:24,482
How bout if I slump like this,
86
00:05:24,529 --> 00:05:26,830
make my eyes shifty like that,
87
00:05:26,890 --> 00:05:30,399
and put a wise-ass smirk on my face like so!
88
00:05:30,969 --> 00:05:33,411
You are my twin! But how?!
89
00:05:33,537 --> 00:05:35,458
I think I can explain.
90
00:05:35,553 --> 00:05:39,062
My father,
the late King Donald Pumpus the 27th
91
00:05:39,169 --> 00:05:40,569
told me I was adopted
92
00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:43,675
and that I had a twin
somewhere in the universe.
93
00:05:43,759 --> 00:05:45,395
You mean we're brothers?
94
00:05:45,466 --> 00:05:48,763
Yes, identical in every way.
95
00:05:48,810 --> 00:05:51,964
I guess our real parents
couldn't afford to raise two children,
96
00:05:52,018 --> 00:05:54,105
so they gave me up.
97
00:05:54,199 --> 00:05:56,476
It must have been heart wrenching.
98
00:05:59,227 --> 00:06:02,981
I wonder if we were both blessed
with the same happy childhoods.
99
00:06:03,142 --> 00:06:05,364
I wouldn't bet on it.
100
00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:08,726
on my fifth birthday,
I got a supercomputer
101
00:06:08,727 --> 00:06:12,226
programmed with every video game
on the planet.
102
00:06:12,227 --> 00:06:14,211
What did you get?
103
00:06:14,351 --> 00:06:16,129
A pack of cigarettes.
104
00:06:16,211 --> 00:06:20,071
When I was 16,
they gave me my own arabian stallion
105
00:06:20,141 --> 00:06:21,896
and private riding lessons.
106
00:06:21,971 --> 00:06:24,356
I had to drop out of school at 16
107
00:06:24,357 --> 00:06:27,281
to help support our dear old mom and dad.
108
00:06:27,386 --> 00:06:30,357
I received the best education money can buy,
109
00:06:30,427 --> 00:06:33,398
you were forced to support our parents.
110
00:06:33,462 --> 00:06:35,509
I like to think it gave me character.
111
00:06:35,596 --> 00:06:36,883
You want a date?
112
00:06:36,941 --> 00:06:39,427
With you!? I'd rather get puked on.
113
00:06:39,544 --> 00:06:42,000
That'll cost you fifty.
114
00:06:42,194 --> 00:06:45,615
I'd sure hate to be the loser our parents kept.
115
00:06:45,732 --> 00:06:47,603
You are the loser they kept.
116
00:06:48,743 --> 00:06:50,936
but now, fate has brought us together.
117
00:06:51,126 --> 00:06:52,646
Yeah, so you can gloat.
118
00:06:52,793 --> 00:06:54,021
Well, forget about it.
119
00:06:54,079 --> 00:06:55,892
You might have had a perfect childhood,
120
00:06:56,038 --> 00:06:58,407
you might be rich,
you might be powerful,
121
00:06:58,465 --> 00:07:01,886
you might have women at your beck and call...
122
00:07:02,109 --> 00:07:04,244
.. man, I got screwed.
123
00:07:04,334 --> 00:07:05,714
But look at you now.
124
00:07:05,861 --> 00:07:08,728
You're the captain of a star ship
125
00:07:08,784 --> 00:07:10,292
or some kind of sleazy ship.
126
00:07:10,356 --> 00:07:11,948
Free to roam the universe,
127
00:07:12,012 --> 00:07:14,391
with not a care in the world.
128
00:07:14,455 --> 00:07:16,642
Danger! Excitement! Adventure!
129
00:07:16,739 --> 00:07:18,672
I'm actually quite envious.
130
00:07:18,757 --> 00:07:21,816
You mean you would rather have had
my childhood instead of yours?
131
00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:23,361
What are you, stupid?
132
00:07:23,411 --> 00:07:24,667
Of course not.
133
00:07:24,741 --> 00:07:26,785
But recently, the bureaucratic burden
134
00:07:26,786 --> 00:07:29,916
of ruling an entire planet has grown very heavy.
135
00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:31,921
I wish I could just get on a star ship
136
00:07:31,922 --> 00:07:34,312
and take off into who knows where!
137
00:07:34,391 --> 00:07:36,732
Hey, it's not as exciting as it sounds.
138
00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:38,379
You got it pretty good here bro.
139
00:07:39,708 --> 00:07:42,310
Chode, what if we switched places?
140
00:07:42,396 --> 00:07:45,113
I'll take your ship
and be free to do as I please.
141
00:07:45,213 --> 00:07:48,710
And you can rule here
and live in the lap of luxury.
142
00:07:49,693 --> 00:07:51,803
Let me think abou... yes!
143
00:07:54,276 --> 00:07:55,866
What of your crew?
144
00:07:55,952 --> 00:07:58,004
Do you think they will notice the switch?
145
00:07:58,100 --> 00:08:01,221
Just pretend you're an arrogant bastard
who thinks only of himself.
146
00:08:01,308 --> 00:08:02,493
Who needs to pretend?
147
00:08:12,081 --> 00:08:15,347
I'm King Philbrick,
I'm King Philbrick,
148
00:08:15,433 --> 00:08:18,439
not Chode but King Philbrick.
149
00:08:18,597 --> 00:08:20,648
Does his majesty, King Philbrick
150
00:08:20,649 --> 00:08:23,424
wish anything before he starts the day?
151
00:08:24,169 --> 00:08:25,857
Your majesty?
152
00:08:26,343 --> 00:08:27,568
King Philbrick?
153
00:08:28,239 --> 00:08:30,412
King Philbrick, are you all right?
154
00:08:32,590 --> 00:08:35,295
Oh me, heh, right, King Philbrick.
155
00:08:35,388 --> 00:08:37,885
Let's see, just a quick trip to the throne
156
00:08:37,931 --> 00:08:39,781
and I'll be good to go.
157
00:08:43,663 --> 00:08:46,437
How am I supposed to take a crap on that?
158
00:08:46,438 --> 00:08:47,640
There's no hole!
159
00:08:56,094 --> 00:08:58,499
Greetings! My loyal subjects!
160
00:08:58,545 --> 00:09:00,722
My god, would you look at that starry sky!
161
00:09:00,740 --> 00:09:03,289
Think of the infinite possibilities.
162
00:09:03,353 --> 00:09:05,156
Somebody's had too much coffee.
163
00:09:05,226 --> 00:09:06,613
Did you sleep well, Chode?
164
00:09:06,983 --> 00:09:08,994
Who? Oh yes, yes I did.
165
00:09:09,064 --> 00:09:10,983
Not a care in the world!
166
00:09:11,195 --> 00:09:12,559
What's on the agenda today?
167
00:09:12,651 --> 00:09:15,125
Are we going to steal something?
Or con somebody?
168
00:09:15,275 --> 00:09:17,101
We're trying to lay low.
169
00:09:17,171 --> 00:09:18,951
The Dark Clowns are still in the area.
170
00:09:19,321 --> 00:09:22,743
Oh yes, the dark clowns. What fun!
171
00:09:29,153 --> 00:09:32,043
This is the third damn building
I've dedicated today.
172
00:09:32,110 --> 00:09:33,590
When do I get to have some fun?
173
00:09:33,682 --> 00:09:37,611
Well, after this you're giving a speech
at the Ministry of Finance,
174
00:09:37,694 --> 00:09:41,000
then you're scheduled to tour
the Ministry of the Interior
175
00:09:41,086 --> 00:09:43,444
and then the Ministry of Defence.
176
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:46,658
Where the hell's the Ministry of Booze and Sex?
177
00:09:51,217 --> 00:09:52,026
Sorry,
178
00:09:52,118 --> 00:09:53,367
didn't see your finger there.
179
00:09:53,436 --> 00:09:55,771
Slip that guy a couple of bucks would ya.
180
00:09:57,117 --> 00:09:58,597
Oh look, time for lunch.
181
00:09:58,643 --> 00:10:00,794
What should I have... cornish game hen?
182
00:10:00,909 --> 00:10:03,476
Pheasant under glass?
Duck l'orange?
183
00:10:07,665 --> 00:10:08,706
What's this?!
184
00:10:08,825 --> 00:10:11,253
I don't know.
But it was dead, so I cooked it.
185
00:10:14,097 --> 00:10:17,172
Computer, scan the area immediately!
186
00:10:17,269 --> 00:10:19,096
Oh, that sounded good.
187
00:10:19,235 --> 00:10:21,824
A Dark Clown battle cruiser
has us in a tractor beam!
188
00:10:21,894 --> 00:10:25,732
I'm... trying... to resist but I can't...
189
00:10:25,805 --> 00:10:27,978
It's Darph Bobo! He's found us.
190
00:10:28,094 --> 00:10:29,458
Don't worry, loyal crew,
191
00:10:29,551 --> 00:10:31,470
I'll handle this.
Screen on!
192
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:33,435
Screen on. I love this.
193
00:10:34,221 --> 00:10:36,140
Hello, Chode.
194
00:10:36,231 --> 00:10:39,445
Or should I just call you dead meat.
195
00:10:39,526 --> 00:10:41,767
Quiet, insolent knave and be gone!
196
00:10:41,768 --> 00:10:44,196
You are interrupting my lunch.
197
00:10:44,265 --> 00:10:46,554
Oh, is that so?!
198
00:10:46,613 --> 00:10:49,549
Well I'm about to interrupt
your rotten little life
199
00:10:49,550 --> 00:10:50,950
permanently!
200
00:10:51,019 --> 00:10:54,162
Keep it up and I will be forced
to send the royal guard after you
201
00:10:54,183 --> 00:10:56,179
and have you thrown into the dungeon!
202
00:10:56,225 --> 00:10:58,061
Would now be a good time to remind you
203
00:10:58,106 --> 00:11:00,126
that we don't have a royal guard?
204
00:11:01,479 --> 00:11:03,911
Activate the laser shredder!
205
00:11:07,992 --> 00:11:10,057
I think my phone's ringing...
206
00:11:11,159 --> 00:11:12,558
I don't hear anything.
207
00:11:13,280 --> 00:11:16,446
In Muldavia.
I'll just take the shuttle and go answer it.
208
00:11:24,295 --> 00:11:26,598
come on, come on, come on!
209
00:11:27,729 --> 00:11:28,829
May I remind you,
210
00:11:28,830 --> 00:11:31,492
the captain is supposed to go down with the ship.
211
00:11:31,572 --> 00:11:32,995
I'm not the captain!
212
00:11:33,027 --> 00:11:34,748
I suspected it for some time.
213
00:11:34,817 --> 00:11:36,767
Who are you and where is captain Chode?
214
00:11:36,859 --> 00:11:38,327
Where I should be!
215
00:11:38,396 --> 00:11:40,645
In the lap of luxury having the time of his life.
216
00:11:42,484 --> 00:11:44,365
I've never shaken so many hands
217
00:11:44,366 --> 00:11:47,394
or kissed so many snot-nosed babies in my life.
218
00:11:47,452 --> 00:11:50,618
What a miserable racket this turned out to be.
219
00:11:50,695 --> 00:11:53,242
Ooh, a hot bath, that's what I need.
220
00:11:55,445 --> 00:11:57,441
You rang, your highness.
221
00:11:57,510 --> 00:11:59,483
A hot bubble bath and hurry.
222
00:11:59,550 --> 00:12:00,881
I'm sorry sir,
223
00:12:00,949 --> 00:12:03,290
all of the servants quit today.
224
00:12:03,336 --> 00:12:05,837
- Why?
- The royal coffers are empty.
225
00:12:05,905 --> 00:12:07,626
You're flat broke.
226
00:12:08,089 --> 00:12:09,558
When did this happen?
227
00:12:09,626 --> 00:12:11,623
I've been telling you this for years,
228
00:12:11,668 --> 00:12:14,101
but you just kept spending all our money
229
00:12:14,169 --> 00:12:16,579
on booze and phone sex.
230
00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:20,292
How am I supposed to pay for booze
and phone sex now?!
231
00:12:20,384 --> 00:12:22,725
Why, that no good Philbrick should rot in hell!
232
00:12:22,770 --> 00:12:24,422
That's my line.
233
00:12:25,478 --> 00:12:28,071
Draw your own tub, fatso!
234
00:12:33,300 --> 00:12:35,457
Being king sucks the big one.
235
00:12:35,851 --> 00:12:37,090
We can't break free.
236
00:12:37,136 --> 00:12:39,843
We'll need some kind of devious trick to get away.
237
00:12:39,945 --> 00:12:43,708
Only the mind of a sneaky,
twisted weasel of a man can save us!
238
00:12:43,799 --> 00:12:46,094
Chode, what are you waiting for?!
239
00:12:46,140 --> 00:12:47,356
He's not Chode.
240
00:12:47,429 --> 00:12:50,343
No, but I am a sneaky,
twisted weasel of a man.
241
00:12:50,457 --> 00:12:52,017
It runs in the family.
242
00:12:52,086 --> 00:12:53,761
Chode's my twin brother.
243
00:12:57,941 --> 00:12:59,272
I hope you don't mind,
244
00:12:59,364 --> 00:13:02,691
but I thought it would be fun
if I televised your death.
245
00:13:02,831 --> 00:13:06,053
The networks are always looking for
the next cheap reality show.
246
00:13:06,117 --> 00:13:08,962
You have five minutes to live!
247
00:13:09,076 --> 00:13:12,380
But it will be painfully stretched over 10 episodes.
248
00:13:12,472 --> 00:13:14,261
Screen off!
249
00:13:14,364 --> 00:13:15,420
How did I sound?
250
00:13:15,488 --> 00:13:17,921
I don't want to be totally unsympathetic.
251
00:13:17,989 --> 00:13:20,009
Try totally pathetic.
252
00:13:20,054 --> 00:13:23,037
I said screen off!
253
00:13:23,087 --> 00:13:25,611
Is that so hard?
254
00:13:25,657 --> 00:13:29,282
I just can't work under these conditions.
255
00:13:30,134 --> 00:13:32,635
Maybe we can contact Chode
before it's too late.
256
00:13:32,727 --> 00:13:35,434
Good idea.
Two dirty minds are better than one!
257
00:13:37,044 --> 00:13:39,063
Chode! Are you there?
258
00:13:39,132 --> 00:13:40,486
Philbrick, is that you?
259
00:13:40,578 --> 00:13:42,390
Yes, I need your help.
260
00:13:42,459 --> 00:13:44,708
I'll say you do, you're dead broke!
261
00:13:44,780 --> 00:13:47,052
Oh, that. Didn't I mention that?
262
00:13:47,121 --> 00:13:49,346
No. You didn't ya skunk.
263
00:13:49,456 --> 00:13:52,660
Well, anyhoo,
Darph Bobo has us in a tractor beam
264
00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:55,798
and is going to kill us on live television!
265
00:13:55,887 --> 00:13:59,916
Oh. Just tell Bobo there's a chest
full of something precious on board.
266
00:14:00,027 --> 00:14:02,834
- Like uh, uh...
- uh... ice cream?!
267
00:14:02,923 --> 00:14:04,966
No I already used that one.
268
00:14:04,999 --> 00:14:07,365
Wow, we really are twins.
269
00:14:07,409 --> 00:14:09,840
Uh, make it chocolate bars this time.
270
00:14:09,900 --> 00:14:12,109
Then, when he demands
the chocolate be sent over,
271
00:14:12,110 --> 00:14:15,050
send a box with a thermo nuclear bomb inside.
272
00:14:15,138 --> 00:14:16,641
There's one under my bed.
273
00:14:16,709 --> 00:14:18,190
But won't we be blown up with him?
274
00:14:18,300 --> 00:14:21,482
Nah, they have to turn off the tractor beam
to beam something over.
275
00:14:21,571 --> 00:14:24,311
Tell Six to have the hyper drive ready and boom!
276
00:14:24,422 --> 00:14:28,849
You're outta there and all that's left of Bobo
is some fried clown fritters.
277
00:14:30,794 --> 00:14:31,877
What the hell is that?
278
00:14:31,981 --> 00:14:35,959
Uh... if history is repeating itself,
I'd say it's an ugly violent peasant revolt
279
00:14:36,048 --> 00:14:40,180
which usually ends in somebody's royal head
getting lopped off and stuck on a stick!
280
00:14:40,233 --> 00:14:41,382
I'm too young to die!
281
00:14:41,471 --> 00:14:44,741
That's what King Trumpus the 27th
said right before they killed him.
282
00:14:45,412 --> 00:14:47,344
Ooops! Gotta go!
283
00:14:47,918 --> 00:14:49,918
Philbrick! Are you in there?!
284
00:14:53,488 --> 00:14:56,488
Come out and take your punishment like a man!
285
00:14:57,687 --> 00:14:59,830
I'm sorry, he's not here!
286
00:14:59,942 --> 00:15:02,041
I think he's on the second floor...
287
00:15:02,107 --> 00:15:03,831
eating cake while you starve.
288
00:15:03,986 --> 00:15:07,986
He's not gonna get away with that! C'mon!!
289
00:15:12,302 --> 00:15:14,136
Greetings, evil one!
290
00:15:14,227 --> 00:15:18,647
Oh, what is it!
I'll have you know begging for mercy won't work.
291
00:15:18,735 --> 00:15:22,801
Please accept a small token in hopes
that we may start a dialogue
292
00:15:22,862 --> 00:15:24,873
and resolve the differences between us.
293
00:15:24,961 --> 00:15:27,724
It better be a hell of a big token.
294
00:15:27,812 --> 00:15:31,149
Would a case of chocolate bars be to your liking?
295
00:15:31,260 --> 00:15:34,686
Exactly how stupid do you think I am?
296
00:15:34,752 --> 00:15:36,608
You beam the chocolate bars over
297
00:15:36,609 --> 00:15:39,923
and there's a thermo nuclear bomb inside instead...
298
00:15:40,001 --> 00:15:42,807
I have no intention of falling for that...
299
00:15:47,712 --> 00:15:50,275
is that milk chocolate or dark chocolate?
300
00:15:52,376 --> 00:15:54,829
- Dark chocolate.
- With nuts?
301
00:15:56,243 --> 00:15:58,586
- Almonds...
- Almonds?!
302
00:15:58,830 --> 00:16:01,725
Did I say almonds? I meant hazelnuts!
303
00:16:01,844 --> 00:16:04,871
Hazelnuts! Prepare to die!
304
00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:09,999
What am I thinking? These aren't hazelnuts,
they're macadamia nuts.
305
00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:14,987
Macadamia nuts?!! With dark chocolate?!
Tell me there's a raisin and I'll...
306
00:16:15,076 --> 00:16:16,402
Well, whatdoyaknow.
307
00:16:16,468 --> 00:16:19,562
I just bit down on a big fat juicy raisin.
308
00:16:19,644 --> 00:16:20,992
Lemme think about it!
309
00:16:21,324 --> 00:16:23,512
I thought about it. Send it over!
310
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:27,976
I'm putting the laser shredder in neutral,
but I'm warning you,
311
00:16:28,021 --> 00:16:31,932
one push of a button
and you're all ground beef!
312
00:16:32,021 --> 00:16:34,474
Wow, Uncle Chode, nice going.
313
00:16:34,563 --> 00:16:37,127
He's not Chode, he's Chode's twin.
314
00:16:37,193 --> 00:16:41,348
Allow me to introduce myself:
I'm King Philbrick of Muldavia.
315
00:16:41,414 --> 00:16:42,629
Please, no bowing.
316
00:16:42,719 --> 00:16:46,078
You're as arrogant and full of yourself
for no good reason as Chode.
317
00:16:46,144 --> 00:16:47,757
It's all in the genes.
318
00:16:47,877 --> 00:16:50,330
By the way, where'd you get a chocolate bar?
319
00:16:50,396 --> 00:16:53,225
Oh there's a big case under Chode's bed
next to the bomb.
320
00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:56,915
Bastard! And he knows how much
I crave chocolate when I'm in heat.
321
00:16:57,020 --> 00:17:01,042
And judgin' from the looks of ya,
I'm bettin' that's pretty often, galzilla.
322
00:17:01,108 --> 00:17:05,020
How would you like a size twelve hoof
up your royal ass?
323
00:17:05,065 --> 00:17:07,849
People, our lives are at stake here.
It's important we focus!
324
00:17:07,916 --> 00:17:09,087
She's right!
325
00:17:09,684 --> 00:17:13,772
Do those nipples always stay hard?
Sorry. Focus people!!
326
00:17:15,505 --> 00:17:21,119
My conscience wouldn't allow me to leave
your highness in his hour of need!
327
00:17:21,229 --> 00:17:24,500
I'm guessin' the roads were blocked
and there's no way out of town.
328
00:17:24,655 --> 00:17:25,650
Bingo.
329
00:17:25,805 --> 00:17:27,086
Here's what we're gonna do.
330
00:17:27,153 --> 00:17:29,539
I'm gonna start making some decrees.
331
00:17:29,606 --> 00:17:32,479
From this moment on, prostitution is legal.
332
00:17:32,583 --> 00:17:34,616
The drinking age is lowered to ten.
333
00:17:34,705 --> 00:17:38,926
And we're startin' a lottery
to refill the royal coffers.
334
00:17:39,015 --> 00:17:40,982
What do we use for prize money?
335
00:17:41,026 --> 00:17:44,903
Oh that's simple. It's just a fraction
of what the suckers pay in.
336
00:17:45,278 --> 00:17:50,714
Oh your highness, why did I ever doubt
your low minded treachery?!
337
00:17:50,804 --> 00:17:55,688
And may I add, this silver dress
sets off your eyes beautifully.
338
00:17:55,798 --> 00:17:58,030
Hey, this king's not looking for a queen.
339
00:17:58,097 --> 00:18:00,617
Now get up off your knees and start decreeing,
340
00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:03,777
because I've gotta sneak outta here
to see a clown about a bomb.
341
00:18:03,932 --> 00:18:06,385
But your majesty. We need you.
342
00:18:06,453 --> 00:18:09,768
Oh I'll be back.
Or someone that looks just like me.
343
00:18:12,206 --> 00:18:15,013
Warning!
Muldavian royal super shuttle is docking.
344
00:18:15,079 --> 00:18:17,156
Additional warning,
woman driver at the wheel!
345
00:18:21,842 --> 00:18:25,047
Oh my god!
You could be brother and sister!
346
00:18:25,137 --> 00:18:27,303
What are you doing here, I can handle this.
347
00:18:27,391 --> 00:18:30,441
I wanna make sure I'm on this ship
when it goes into hyperdrive
348
00:18:30,507 --> 00:18:34,176
and you're the chump stuck ruling
that bipolar mob in Muldavia.
349
00:18:34,243 --> 00:18:36,630
Is that the only reason you came back?
350
00:18:41,132 --> 00:18:44,071
Hey, you're a bunch of misfits and outcasts,
351
00:18:44,116 --> 00:18:46,591
but your my misfits and outcasts.
352
00:18:46,635 --> 00:18:49,309
And well, I've kinda gotten use to ya
353
00:18:50,835 --> 00:18:53,951
Ok, enough mushy stuff. Beat it bro!
354
00:18:54,570 --> 00:18:58,017
You know, in your own way,
you're really a king too.
355
00:18:59,028 --> 00:19:01,811
By the way, do my loyal subjects
still want to kill me?
356
00:19:01,846 --> 00:19:04,729
I fixed all that. At least I think I did.
357
00:19:05,902 --> 00:19:09,216
Where is my chocolate
and why are you wearing a dress?
358
00:19:09,305 --> 00:19:11,692
Your chocolate should be there any minute and
359
00:19:11,736 --> 00:19:14,211
I am wearing a dress because it's laundry day
360
00:19:14,257 --> 00:19:15,937
and I don't have anything else clean.
361
00:19:16,003 --> 00:19:17,461
Well you look ridiculous!
362
00:19:17,550 --> 00:19:18,764
You're just saying that
363
00:19:18,765 --> 00:19:22,456
because you couldn't pull this ensemble off
with your chicken legs!
364
00:19:22,826 --> 00:19:27,312
Enough!! I want my chocolate bars
and I want 'em now!
365
00:19:28,483 --> 00:19:30,141
We're ready for hyperdrive, sir.
366
00:19:30,356 --> 00:19:32,367
Here they come, Bobo.
367
00:19:32,433 --> 00:19:35,925
You're gonna love 'em, they're the bomb!
368
00:19:37,980 --> 00:19:40,124
Oh crap. Not again.
369
00:19:46,187 --> 00:19:47,933
I owe you a great debt.
370
00:19:48,022 --> 00:19:50,276
I've never seen my people so happy.
371
00:19:50,322 --> 00:19:53,769
They've promised to erect
a statue to me as soon as they...
372
00:19:54,587 --> 00:19:55,692
... sober up.
373
00:19:55,758 --> 00:19:57,438
Hey, no thanks is necessary.
374
00:19:57,505 --> 00:20:00,334
Unless it's in the form of
some under the table kickback.
375
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:01,726
I'll see what I can do.
376
00:20:01,792 --> 00:20:05,195
I find it extremely interesting that
two people raised so differently
377
00:20:05,196 --> 00:20:06,610
can turn out so much alike.
378
00:20:06,665 --> 00:20:08,566
Yeah, they're both greedy bastards.
379
00:20:08,609 --> 00:20:10,885
Only difference is one of 'em wears a crown.
380
00:20:10,951 --> 00:20:13,868
Well, in the game of nature versus nurture,
381
00:20:13,890 --> 00:20:18,487
I'd say the score is
Nature: Two, Nurture: Zero.
382
00:20:19,246 --> 00:20:22,450
- Farewell my brother!
- Yeah, see ya around,
383
00:20:22,525 --> 00:20:25,133
but not around Muldavia.
384
00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:28,691
What?
385
00:20:28,818 --> 00:20:31,779
Were you just trying to see
how the other half lives, uncle Chode?
386
00:20:31,890 --> 00:20:34,917
Maybe he just wanted to walk a mile
in somebody else's heels.
387
00:20:35,007 --> 00:20:38,145
All right, that's it!
Everybody back to work.
388
00:20:38,211 --> 00:20:39,559
And I mean now!
389
00:20:39,647 --> 00:20:43,205
- Sheesh, what a grouch.
- P.M.S
390
00:20:47,569 --> 00:20:49,668
This is the thanks I get?
391
00:20:49,999 --> 00:20:53,027
This is the last time
I save this bunch of ingrates.
392
00:20:53,071 --> 00:20:55,812
God, these panties are riding up my crack!
393
00:20:55,879 --> 00:20:58,420
You should do what I do, don't wear any!
394
00:21:00,903 --> 00:21:05,212
Eeeew! Just when I was thinking
it was good to be home.
395
00:21:06,051 --> 00:21:11,542
Sub by C-line: www.forom.com (fixed)
Transcript: www.sadgeezer.com
0
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
www.tvsubtitles.net