[ROZALLA'S "EVERYBODY'S FREE TO FEEL GOOD" PLAYS]
♪ BROTHER AND SISTER ♪
♪ TOGETHER WE'LL MAKE IT THROUGH ♪
♪ SOME DAY A SPIRIT WILL LIFT YOU ♪
♪ AND TAKE YOU DOWN ♪
♪ I KNOW YOU'VE BEEN HURTING ♪
♪ BUT I'LL BE THE ONE TO BE THERE FOR YOU ♪
♪ AND I'LL BE THERE JUST HELPING YOU OUT ♪
♪ WHENEVER I CAN ♪
♪ OH ♪
♪ EVERYBODY'S FREE ♪
♪ TO FEEL GOOD ♪
♪ EVERYBODY'S FREE ♪
♪ TO FEEL GOOD ♪
♪ EVERYBODY'S FREE ♪
NO! NO!
I DON'T WANNA GO BACK! I'M NOT DONE FINDING MYSELF!
YOU GOTTA.
NO, PLEASE, BROCK, I FEEL AMAZING.
I NEVER WANT THE NIGHT TO END.
YOU CAN'T RUN AWAY FROM YOUR LIFE FOREVER, DOC.
THIS IS MY LIFE NOW, MOM. DEAL WITH IT.
YOU'VE GOT RESPONSIBILITIES AT HOME.
THE BILLS ARE STACKING UP AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL
WITH WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BOYS.
SCREW THE BOYS! I WANT TO STAY HERE WITH MY NEW FAMILY
AND THEIR FEEL-GOOD CANDY.
YOU'VE HAD YOUR FUN, DOC, IT'S TIME.
NO. BROCK, NO!
THIS IS SKY. WE'RE GONNA HAVE A CHILD.
PLEASE.
BUT WE'RE THE VENTURE BROTHERS.
SHOULDN'T WE WORK TOGETHER?
WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO GET RID OF YOU,
YOU PARASITE -- TWEEZERS AND A MATCH?
I GIVE YOU LIFE, I GIVE YOU HALF MY STUFF
I GIVE YOU THE X-2, FOR GOD'S SAKE.
WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT -- MY BLOOD?
HERE! TAKE IT. TAKE MY BLOOD!
OR BETTER YET, JUST CLIMB RIGHT ON BACK INSIDE ME.
GO ON, JUMP BACK IN THERE. COME ON.
FINE, NEVER MIND.
JUST LET ME GET MY STUFF FROM THE LAB, AND I'LL GO.
THE LAB. TRY MY LAB.
MINE, YOURS, WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE?
WE'RE THE VENTURE BROTHERS!
WHAT'S MINE IS YOURS.
YEAH, YEAH, YOU'RE VERY GENEROUS WITH MY THINGS.
LOOK, TWEAKY, I HAVE SOME BITTY, BITTY, BITTY BIG
GOVERNMENT CONTRACTS I'VE GOTTA GET CRACKING ON.
I'M BITTY BITTY BACK IN ACTION,
AND THERE ARE BITTY BITTY BILLS TO PAY!
SUPER! I CAN USE YOUR HELP. I'VE GOT MOST OF THEM COMPLETE.
I THINK THERE ARE TWO LEFT.
A SOUND THAT KILLS, AND A TELEPORTER.
DIBS ON THE KILLING SOUND.
"DIBS"? SCREW YOU! THOSE ARE MY CONTRACTS.
THEY WERE ADDRESSED TO DOCTOR VENTURE,
AND SINCE YOU'VE BEEN GONE, I'VE RECEIVED TWO DOCTORATES.
SO, I'M A DOCTOR VENTURE, TOO.
I WAS ONLY GONE A MONTH.
YOU CAN HAVE THE TELEPORTER.
FINE, I'LL CLEAN UP YOUR MESS.
GREAT, I'M HALF DONE WITH IT.
IT'S IN THE MANUFACTURING WING. I PUT YOUR STAFF ON THE JOB.
WAIT, I HAVE A MANUFACTURING WING?
I HAVE A STAFF?
I DID THIS. I LET THIS HAPPEN TO THEM.
THE BOYS WERE IN MY CHARGE AND I FAILED!
NOT YOUR FAULT. THESE THINGS HAPPEN.
WHAT IS IT WITH YOU PEOPLE? THOSE CHILDREN WERE
CUT DOWN IN THEIR PRIME, AND MY NEGLIGENCE IS TO BLAME.
HATE ME!
ALL RIGHT, FINE. I HATE YOU.
HEY, YOU HUNGRY? THINKING ABOUT MAKING GRILLED CHEESE.
I ACCEPT YOUR HATRED.
I DON'T WANT TO WORRY YOU WITH THE PARTICULARS,
BUT I AM BY TRADE A NECROMANCER.
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, RIGHT?
YEAH, THAT YOU HAVE SEX WITH DEAD PEOPLE.
PHILE, A NECROPHILE.
A NECROMANCER CAN BRING THE DEAD TO LIFE.
NO. HEY, SWIFTY. SWIFTY, LOOK HERE.
RIGHTY TIGHTY, LEFTY LOOSEY.
COME ON, MAN, EYES DOWN HERE.
WHERE ARE YOU LOOKING?
HOW THE HELL DID THEY GET IN HERE?
I PADLOCKED THIS WING YEARS AGO.
HEY! RUSTY, HOW YOU DOING?
LONG TIME NO SEE.
NOT AGAIN. JUST LET ME TAKE THE I.D.s OUT.
HERE, NOW YOU CAN'T KILL ME. HOBO CODE, RIGHT?
HEY, THIS ONE ALWAYS A KIDDER.
I'VE KNOWN HIM 30 YEARS.
HEY, SWIFTY, SAY HI TO RUSTY.
HE WAS SO FLIPPED UP, TURNED AROUND --
SERIOUSLY, WHOEVER YOU ARE, I DON'T WANT ANY TROUBLE.
JUST PACK UP YOUR LITTLE SHANTY TOWN AND LEAVE.
YOU REALLY DON'T REMEMBER ME? ALL THOSE ADVENTURES WE HAD?
WOW, THAT LITTLE BROWN BOY SAVED YOUR LIFE.
THIS AZTEC CALENDAR SAYS
TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAY.
CAN WE KEEP HIM, PA?
UM...
YEAH, NO. NOT RINGING A BELL.
HEY, HON, YOU READY?
JUST A SEC-- HELLO!
TELL ME SHE WORKS HERE, TOO.
MY RIDE. WELL, I'LL BE SEEING YOU, BIG BROTHER.
YOU'RE LEAVING ME WITH THESE PEOPLE?
YEP, OFF TO SPIDER SKULL ISLAND.
DID YOU BRING THE BAG, HONEY?
ONE FOR ME, AND ONE FOR COLLETTE.
GO TEAM VENTURE.
I USED TO BE PRETTY, BUT NOT NO MORE.
LOOK AT MY NOSE.
[ZIPPER]
HEY, WHAT THE --
ARE YOU RAPING ME?
NO. WELL, I WAS GONNA...
GONNA! WHAT THE [BLEEP], KING?
COULDN'T GET IT UP.
YOU'RE BUILT TOO MUCH LIKE A GIRL.
I COULDN'T GET INTO IT.
WAIT A-- THIS ISN'T EVEN MY CELL!
WHAT -- DID YOU TAKE ME TO YOUR PLACE?
I GOT PORN HERE. IT HELPS.
LA LA LA LA LA LA.
HANK!
DEAN!
HEY, HEAD, ON MY HEAD.
OH, MY APOLOGIES. I DIDN'T SEE YOU --
WAIT, PERHAPS YOU COULD HELP.
FROM YOUR HELMET I CAN JUDGE THAT YOU'VE BEEN HERE LONG ENOUGH --
YES, PILGRIM, I, IN LIFE, WAS
A PERSONAL GUARD TO THE GREAT CAESAR.
NUH-UH, LIAR! YOU CHOKED ON A POPSICLE STICK
AT A HALLOWEEN PARTY.
OH, TELL EVERYONE, WHY DON'T YA?
EVERYBODY KNOWS.
WHY DO YOU THINK YOU'RE IN HELL --
'CAUSE YOU'RE A [BLEEP] LIAR.
WELL, I'M TRYING TO FIND THE SOULS OF TWO INNOCENTS.
ONE -- DEAN -- HAS RUST COLORED HAIR.
THE OTHER -- HANK -- IS TOW HEADED.
AND I HAD I SAID TO HER...
TELEPORTER.
SO THIS BABY'S ALMOST FINISHED, RIGHT?
DON'T QUOTE ME ON THIS,
BUT I BELIEVE THERE WAS A RING
THAT LEFT THE RADIO.
WHAT THE HELL IS HE TALKING ABOUT?
OH, SWIFTY'S JUST A LITTLE BIT PUNCHY.
HE USED TO BE A MIDDLEWEIGHT PRIZE FIGHTER.
BUT AFTER HIS BRAIN WENT SOFT, HIS WIFE LEFT HIM
AND YOUR FATHER PUT HIM TO WORK HERE.
MY DAD'S DEAD. SO, SWIFTY, YOU'RE FIRED.
YOUR FATHER DIED?
LIKE, 20 YEARS AGO. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
HERE. 20 YEARS?
I'M 40...5?
I HAVEN'T EVEN KISSED A GIRL YET.
MY GOD, THAT'S SAD. WELL, YOU'RE FIRED, TOO.
SO, WE JUST LEAVE?
UH, YES.
UH...HUH.
WHERE'S THE, UH,
WHERE'S THE DOOR OUT?
OH, THOSE UNIFORMS ARE VENTURE PROPERTY.
YOU MAY LEAVE THEM IN THE BATHROOM HAMPER.
HALF DONE, MY ASS. LOOKS GOOD TO ME.
I'LL TART IT UP WITH A COAT OF BABY BLUE ENAMEL
AND SHIP HER OFF TO THE GOVERNMENT.
AW, COME ON.
NO WONDER MY POWER BILL'S BEEN THROUGH THE ROOF.
OH, WHAT NOW?
I GOT THE STUFF.
HOW ARE YOU DOING WITH PHASE TWO?
JUST FINISHING UP.
ALL RIGHT, HERE.
YOU KNOW, THEY DON'T HAND WRITE MICRODOTS ON THE OUTSIDE.
THEY USE LIKE COMPUTERS.
YEAH, WELL THEY DON'T USE PHOTOS OF MACAULAY CULKIN
AS MONEY ON THE OUTSIDE EITHER.
AND THEY DON'T HAVE TINY MEN IN THEIR EMPLOY.
CAN'T BELIEVE THEY LET YOU KEEP THOSE IN HERE.
YEAH, THEY THINK A HOBBY AIDS IN REHABILITATION.
IT'S ONLY FAIR.
CAT BABY GETS TO KEEP HER CATS, BEETLE BUM HIS BEETLES.
KING GORILLA'S GOT ALL THOSE TARZANS.
THERE.
FLY! FLY, MY PET!
LET THE BEATING OF YOUR WINGS
IGNITE THE HURRICANE OF MY GLORIOUS SECOND COMING!
TELL THE WORLD!
THE MONARCH SHALL RETURN -- OW!
EAGLE ONE TO GILL BASE FIVE.
HAVE INTERCEPTED MESSAGE FROM BUTTERFLY TO COCOON.
READY TO TRANSMIT DATA.
COPY EAGLE. READY TO RECEIVE.
"HELLO, FRIEND, GOOD NEWS.
FANTASTIC CARIBBEAN GETAWAY."
IDIOT. IT'S PRINTING FROM MEMORY.
WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU PUT PAPER IN THAT THING?
I TOLD YOU YOU CAN'T RUN THE MICROWAVE
AND THE BLOW-DRYER AT THE SAME TIME.
THEY'RE ON THE SAME CIRCUIT.
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? HOW DID YOU EVEN DO THAT?
OW! DON'T DO THAT!
DOC?
DOC.
MY [BLEEP] BROTHER IS AN IDIOT.
SHOULD I ASK?
TELEPORTED. THIS IS ALL I NEED.
YOUR LEGS ARE STICKING OUT OF THE TV.
WHERE'S THE REST OF YOU?
I CAN'T TELL. HOLD ON.
DID YOU HEAR THAT? I JUST THREW SOMETHING.
WAIT, DO IT AGAIN.
NO.
OKAY, JUST A SEC-- OH!
OH, I JUST PUT MY HAND IN SLUDGE.
OH, DON'T TELL ME.
I THINK THE REST OF ME IS IN THE BATHROOM.
MY CLOCK IS BLINKING 12:00.
I THINK THE POWER WENT OUT.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I LIKE DIGGING. CAN'T A MAN LEAVE HIS HOME
WITH A SHOVEL WITHOUT AND INQUISITION?
UM, NO, DAD, YOU HAVE TO LET THEM GO.
I CAN'T. SWEETIE, I CAN FEEL THEM.
THEY ARE BETWEEN WORLDS.
THEY CAN BE RAISED!
IT'S SO SIMPLE. I JUST NEED THEIR BODIES AND THEIR SOULS.
BUT I CAN'T FIND THEIR SOULS.
HOW DO YOU LOSE A SOUL? THEY'RE NOT LIKE CAR KEYS.
YOU DON'T SIMPLY MISPLACE THEM
STOP IT!
I DON'T EVEN WANNA THINK ABOUT THEM AS ZOMBIES.
THAT'S GROSS!
NO, SWEETIE, ZOMBIES ARE ANIMATED BODIES WITHOUT SOULS.
THIS IS A REGULAR RESURRECTION.
STOP CRYING, PUMPKIN.
I'VE DONE THIS HUNDREDS OF TIMES --
DAVID BLAINE, EVEL KNIEVEL -- BOTH DADDY'S CLIENTS.
AS WAS RONALD REAGAN UNTIL HE BOUNCED A CHECK.
I'M GONNA THROW UP.
OH, PUMPKIN, THIS IS ROUTINE.
I JUST RAISE THIS SWORD AND GO
[ANCIENT LANGUAGE]
RISE AND BE ONE WITH THE LIVING.
IT'S ALL VERY HUMDRUM.
[DOORBELL RINGS] LET ME GET THE DOOR.
NOW DON'T TOUCH ANY OF THIS.
YOU COULD ACCIDENTALLY MAKE THE CAT HUGE OR SOMETHING.
YES, I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME.
MILKSHAKE.
IT'S NOT REALLY FIXING ANYTHING.
I DON'T KNOW, DOC. I'M JUST TRYING TO HELP.
I THOUGHT IF WE PUT ALL YOUR PARTS BACK IN THE MACHINE --
RIGHT, LIKE IN THAT JEFF GOLDBLUM MOVIE.
YEAH, SEE.
WELL, WE STILL CAN'T FIND MY RIGHT SIDE,
WHICH I AM NOW CERTAIN IS OUTDOORS.
HOW COME?
BECAUSE IT'S RAINING ON A THIRD OF ME, I'M FREEZING.
HEY, I JUST DISCOVERED THAT MY NIPPLES WORK AS A TEAM.
COME HERE, FEEL IS THIS I GOT GOING.
I BELIEVE YOU.
NO, REALLY, FEEL IT. IT'S LIKE A PENCIL ERASER.
WE HAVE A DOOR, ORPHEUS.
OH, NO! YOU, TOO, ARE TRAPPED BETWEEN WORLDS.
WHAT HAVE I DONE?
RELAX, DOC DID THAT TO HIMSELF.
MY STUPID BROTHER DID THIS.
I HAVE DESTROYED YOUR LIFE.
I HAVE BROUGHT YOUR SONS BACK
AS SOULLESS ZOMBIES.
SO, IS EVERYONE CLEAR
ON WHAT HIS OR HER JOB IS?
TIGERIFIC, YOU LOOK PENSIVE.
THERE'S NO WAY I CAN TEAR THE GATES DOWN.
I'M NOT EVEN CLOSE TO STRONG ENOUGH.
CAN'T SELL YOURSELF SHORT, MAN.
I ONCE WATCHED YOU CLEAVE AN EYE-WITNESS NEWSMAN IN TWAIN.
ALL COSTUME.
I DON'T HAVE ANY POWERS WITHOUT THAT THING.
NO POWERS? I THOUGHT YOU WERE, LIKE, HALF TIGER OR SOMETHING?
NO!
RAISED BY TIGERS, THEN, LIKE MOOGLI?
MOWGLI, AND THAT WAS WOLVES. BUT STILL, NO.
YO, I COULD, UH, PULL THE GATE OFF.
I'M KINDA WASTED AS LOOKOUT ANYWAY.
YOU SURE? I DON'T WANT YOU COMING BACK HERE
TALKING ABOUT THAT'S A GORILLA SUIT.
I CAN DO IT.
GREAT, THEN TIGERIFIC'S ON LOOKOUT.
OR CAN'T YOU SEE WITHOUT YOUR TIGER HELMET?
SO, IF NO ONE, HAS ANY QUESTIONS...
QUESTION, MR. MONDAY.
WHAT EXACTLY WILL MY TITLE BE
IN THIS NEW CRIMINAL SYNDICATE OF OURS?
TITLE? I DON'T KNOW!
I WANT TO BE PRESIDENT OF CALENDARS.
WHATEVER, CRAZY. OKAY, ANYONE ELSE?
OH, THIS IS GOING TO BE SO MONDAY-LICIOUS.
ANYONE NOT TOTALLY RETARDED?
WHITE NOISE?
THIS ORGANIZATION AIN'T GONNA BE RACIALLY MIXED, IS IT?
I CAN'T ALLOW MY PURE WHITE BLOOD TO BE MUDDIED.
DO YOU EVEN HAVE BLOOD?
YOU'RE, LIKE, MADE OUT OF STATIC. I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU'RE WHITE.
OH, I WAS WHITE ONCE.
BEFORE MY TRAGIC LIVE VOLT
TELEVISION REPAIR INCIDENT.
FINE, IDIOT. CAN WE MOVE ON?
SO, RIGHT AT LOCKDOWN TONIGHT --
CAN'T WE PLEASE WAIT TILL MONDAY?
NO! GOD, YOU'RE WORSE THAN MY OLD HENCHMEN.
Man: FLAMES FILLED THE CROCK PIT.
WE ALL KNOW THE SCORE.
CRIME-O-DILE HITS THE EJECT, SAVING ME.
HE WAS LIKE THAT. HIS HENCHMEN ALWAYS CAME FIRST.
ANYWAY, CAPTAIN SUNSHINE KEPT ON HIS TAIL.
HE KEPT ON HIM. THE SHIP GOES DOWN,
AND CAPTAIN SUNSHINE TAKES OUT ONE MORE EVIL DEALER.
AND I'M OUT OF A JOB, RIGHT?
JUST LIKE THAT. SORRY, CHARLIE.
UH, I THINK WE'VE ALL BEEN THERE.
THANK YOU FOR SHARING THAT, CHARLIE.
DOES ANYONE ELSE HAVE ANYTHING TO --
YEAH, YOU.
YEAH, GARY.
FORMER HENCHMEN SKULLIGAN CLASS.
I CAN TOTALLY RELATE TO CHARLIE'S DEAL.
BUT, CHARLIE, DON'T GIVE UP HOPE, MAN.
I MEAN, ESCAPE PODS. YOU GOT YOUR SECRET PARACHUTES.
I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF YOU GO HOME TONIGHT
AND FIND A MESSAGE ON YOUR MACHINE FROM HIM.
GENTLEMEN, PLEASE. GARY, WHAT IS?
GARY, THE POINT OF THIS GROUP
IS NOT TO ENABLE THE HENCHING HABIT,
BUT TO LEARN HOW TO HENCH FOR OURSELVES.
SO INSTEAD OF BEING HENCHMEN,
WE SHOULD BECOME SUPER VILLAINS OURSELVES.
YEAH!
THAT'S NOT AT ALL --
IT'S LIKE IN A BEE HIVE WHEN THE QUEEN DIES.
ONE OF THE WORKERS EATS A WHOLE BUNCH OF ROYAL JELLY,
AND HE MORPHS INTO THE NEW QUEEN.
NO, GENTLEMEN, DON'T LISTEN TO --
I EVEN HAVE THE MONARCH'S CROWN SOMEPLACE.
I CAN CALL MYSELF THE VICEROY.
I LIKE THAT.
NO!
THAT'S WHY I HAVE BEEN LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR THEIR SOULS,
BECAUSE I ACCIDENTALLY RESURRECTED THEIR BODIES.
WAIT, YOU SAW THEIR BODIES?
SAW THEM? I MADE THEM A [BLEEP] MILKSHAKE.
NICE! WAY TO GO, BROCK.
MUST HAVE BEEN THAT POWER SURGE.
WHO IS YOUR GRIEF COUNSELOR, MOTHER THERESA?
HOW CAN YOU BE SO NONCHALANT ABOUT THIS?
MY STUPID TALISMANS AND I
HAVE MADE MOVIE MONSTERS OF YOUR SONS.
I DON'T DESERVE TO WEAR THEM.
[gasps] IT GLOWS!
YOUR SONS' SOULS ARE NEAR.
OKAY, ORPHEUS, WHY DON'T YOU GO HOME AND TAKE A SHOWER?
YOU'RE STARTING TO HALLUCINATE.
NO SHOWER FOR BYRON ORPHEUS.
I CAN FEEL THEM, HEAR THEM.
YOUR BOYS' SOULS ARE IN THIS VERY ROOM!
WILL YOU STOP WITH THE SOUL CRAP!
THERE'S A SCIENTIFIC EXPLANATION FOR ALL OF THIS.
THEY ARE SPEAKING TO ME. THEIR VOICE IS LIKE THUNDER.
IT'S DEAN. SPEAK TO ME, SON.
WILL YOU TELL THEM ALREADY?
AND MISS THIS? NO WAY.
YES, I HEAR THEM. DEAN LOVES YOU.
HE UNDERSTANDS AND FORGIVES YOU.
BUT, HANK...
OH, HANK IS QUITE UPSET.
RAGE, I CAN HEAR HIS RAGE.
HE CALLS YOU A CRUMB BUM.
OR MAYBE A CRAMP ON. IT'S HARD TO HEAR HIM.
ISN'T A CRAMP ON A LITTLE HOOK FOR MOUNTAIN CLIMBING?
HE'S DEFINITELY CALLING ME A CRUMB BUM.
HERE, IT COMES FROM THIS MACHINE.
WHAT IS THIS MACHINE?
THAT MACHINE? OH, NOTHING.
IT MAKES ROBOTS OR SOMETHING.
OH, NO! HAVE I MADE SCARY BOY ROBOTS?
OH, I SHOULD NEVER HAVE PLAYED GOD!
DOC, STOP JERKING THE POOR GUY AROUND
AND JUST TELL HIM.
HE'S GETTIN' ECTOPLASM EVERYWHERE.
THIS ISN'T A REQUEST, KING.
YOU AND YOUR GILL CAN GO SCREW.
TEN YEARS OF PAYING DUES AND WHAT DID THEY DO
TO KEEP ME OUT OF HERE WHEN I GOT CAUGHT, HUH?
OH, WHAT COULD WE DO.
YOU EVISCERATED AND SODOMIZED VINCE NEIL
ON NATIONAL TELEVISION.
HEY, I ONLY SODOMIZED HALF OF HIM.
HE WANTED THE SURREAL LIFE, K.G. GAVE IT TO HIM.
I'D JUST HATE FOR YOU TO BE IN THE SHOWER ONE DAY
WHEN OUT OF THE SHADOWS STEPS A MAN
WITH A SMUGGLED-IN MOLECULAR DESTABILIZER,
AND SNAP!
WHAT WAS ONCE YOUR PENIS IS NOW A TASTEFUL REPRODUCTION
OF A COFFEE TABLE BY HERMAN MILLER.
I DON'T RESPOND TO THREATS, LIMB.
OF COURSE YOU DON'T.
THEY DON'T CALL YOU KING GORILLA
FOR NOTHING, DO THEY?
AND WHAT KING'S COMPLETE WITHOUT A QUEEN?
THAT'S A CAKE.
AH, BUT WHAT'S INSIDE IT, I WONDER?
[sniffs] TARZIPAN?
TARZIPAN.
SLOW DOWN. WHAT ABOUT THE ZOMBIES?
NOW I CALL THOSE CLONE SLUGS.
GREW THOSE YEARS AGO FROM NAIL CLIPPINGS, I THINK.
ANYWAY, AFTER THE SLUGS HAVE BEEN ACTIVATED,
THAT MACHINE -- PURGATORY.
WHATEVER. THAT COMPUTER FEEDS
ALL THEIR NOCTURNALLY RECORDED MEMORY SYNAPSES.
THEIR MEMORIES, HOPES, AND DREAMS --
THEY ARE NOT A SOUL!
YOU'RE KILLING ME WITH THAT CRAP. JUST LET ME FINISH.
THAT COMPUTER FEEDS SYNAPTIC DATA
TO THEIR INCUBATION BEDS.
THAT INFORMATION IS SUPPLEMENTED WITH BASIC KNOWLEDGE
THAT MY DAD RECORDED FOR ME SO I DIDN'T HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL.
AND THAT IS WHY I DIDN'T LOSE MY VIRGINITY
UNTIL I WAS 24. THAT IS AWFUL!
YOU DIDN'T EVEN SEE HER. IT WAS HORRIFIC.
NO, IT WAS AWFUL THAT YOU WOULD DO THIS TO YOUR BOYS.
PLEASE, YOU DID THIS KIND OF CRAP EVERY DAY.
THAT'S DIFFERENT.
WHY? BECAUSE YOU CALL IT BY A DIFFERENT NAME?
CHURCH -- LAB. SOUL -- SYNAPSES.
PURGATORY -- COMPUTER. GET OVER YOURSELF.
I HAVE TO LIE DOWN.
IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL ANY BETTER
THE ONES YOU KNEW WEREN'T THE ORIGINALS.
WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS A LOT, YOU KNOW.
HOW MANY TIMES, BROCK? THIS WILL BE 14.
14 TIMES.
WE HAD A GAS LEAK THAT TIME.
THE SILENT KILLER.
THEN THIS OTHER TIME...
Brock: HA HA HA. I REMEMBER THAT.
THAT WAS WHEN WE BOTH GREW THE, UH...
[laughs] OH, GOD, I KNOW, I KNOW.
WHAT WERE WE THINKING?
OH, THAT WASN'T HALF AS BAD AS WHEN I HAD THOSE HAIR PLUGS.
[both laughing]
WHAT IS THAT? A ROYAL JELLY DOUGHNUT
YOU GOT THERE, YOU BIG QUEEN?
24? GET OUTTA TOWN.
IS THAT YOU? COME HERE, YOU BIG LUG.
ALL RIGHT, NO TOUCHING.
I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT'S WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE
UNDER YOUR COSTUME. HILARIOUS.
YOU LOOK LIKE SEINFELD WITH A UNIBROW. WHO KNEW?
YOU SHOULD TALK, ALL KEVIN SMITH.
AND HERE'S A TIP -- A BEARD IS NOT
A SUBSTITUTE FOR A JAW LINE
NO MATTER HOW YOU TRIM IT.
YOU HAVEN'T CHANGED. SAME OLD 24.
THIS IS WEIRD. TOTALLY.
WHEN IS MONARCH GONNA BUST OUT ALREADY?
282! 283!
OKAY, LOCK DOWN, GENTLEMEN.
CLOSE GATE!
NOW! OH, WHAT THE --
HEY, MONARCH, WHAT THE HELL
ARE YOU DOING OUT OF YOUR CELL?
ASSHOLES! TONIGHT!
IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE TONIGHT!
HEY!
WHAT THE -- WHAT IS THIS, LIQUID PLUMBER?
THIS IS THAT ORANGE POWDER WE USE WHEN SOMEONE THROWS UP!
I GOT HIT WITH A TINY LITTLE MAN.
MONDAY!
HEY, THERE'S MY PRESIDENT OF CALENDARS.
WHERE'S THE BIG DEVOTION? HELLO?
WHITE NOISE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
REMEMBER THOSE GUARDS YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO TAKE OUT?
WELL, GUESS WHAT!
KING, KING.
ANYTIME YOU FEEL LIKE MAKING A MOVE, BUDDY.
KING.
ET TU, KING GORILLA?
I'M SORRY, I CAN'T.
IT'S A GILL THING. PHANTOM LIMB SAID --
PHANTOM LIMB? HE'S DOING THIS?
LISTEN TO ME, KING. KING!
THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE GILL.
HE STOLE MY GIRLFRIEND.
HE JUST WANTS ME OUT OF THE PICTURE PERMANENTLY.
KING! KING!
SOME SOLITARY OUGHT TO CHILL YOU OUT.
YOU CHICKEN [BLEEP] BASTARDS!
THIS ISN'T THE END OF THIS!
THE MONARCH WILL RETURN.
YOU WILL --
COME ON. THE REST WILL BE HERE ANY MINUTE.
UH, KING, THIS IS NOT EXACTLY THE TIME --
OH, GOD.
PIPES EMPTY OUT ABOUT A MILE FROM HERE.
WON'T BE ABLE TO HOLD THEM OFF FOR LONG.
WHAT CHANGED YOUR MIND?
BELIEVE IT OR NOT -- LOVE.
IT WAS THERE IN YOUR EYES
WHEN YOU SPOKE OF YOUR GIRLFRIEND.
I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WERE KIND OF A SCHMUCK,
BUT WHAT KIND OF MONSTER WOULD I BE
TO STAND IN THE WAY OF LOVE?
GO, FIND HER! GET HER BACK!
AND WHEN YOU DO, YOU LOVE HER AND YOU NEVER LET GO.
IT'S ALL TOO MUCH.
I-I --
WHAT AM I GOING TO TELL MY DAUGHTER?
WHAT I TELL EVERYBODY WHEN THIS CRAP HAPPENS --
THE BOYS NEVER DIED.
BUT THEY DID, THEY SHED THEIR MORTAL COIL
AS SNAKE SHEDS HIS SKIN.
STOP IT. THEY ARE HANK AND DEAN.
THEY HAVE ALL THE SAME MEMORIES,
SAME ANNOYING TENDENCIES, SAME EVERYTHING.
LOOK, IF YOU HAVE A CLUMSY CHILD,
YOU MAKE HIM WEAR A HELMET.
IF YOU HAVE DEATH PRONE CHILDREN,
YOU KEEP A FEW CLONES OF THEM IN THE LAB.
SPEAK OF THE DEVILS. THEIR HALF-FORMED EARS MUST BE BURNING.
BROCK, YOU SHOULD PUT THEM BACK IN THE OVEN.
UGH. I HATE TOUCHING THEM.
THEY FEEL LIKE GIANT STRETCH ARMSTRONGS.
SPLIT BETWEEN LIFE AND DEATH.
THE UNIVERSE WEEPS FOR THEM.
HANK, YOU ARE NEVER TO CALL YOUR FATHER
A CRUMB BUM IN FRONT OF COMPANY.
AND WHERE ARE YOUR MANNERS? WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO DR. ORPHEUS?
[garbled] GO, TEAM VENTURE!
CAPTIONING PROVIDED BY TURNER STUDIOS
[coughing and spitting]
THANK GOD YOU GUYS ARE HERE.
I THOUGHT THE WHOLE PLAN GOT --
WHAT?