1 00:00:02,460 --> 00:00:06,423 [ WIND WHISTLES ] 2 00:00:06,506 --> 00:00:09,759 Dean: [ GROANS ] 3 00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:10,427 HUH? 4 00:00:10,510 --> 00:00:11,970 GOOD MORNING. 5 00:00:12,053 --> 00:00:14,931 LAST NIGHT I DRUGGED YOU BOYS AND HAD H.E.L.P.eR. TAKE YOU TO 6 00:00:15,014 --> 00:00:16,307 YOUR NEW HOMES. 7 00:00:16,391 --> 00:00:19,018 AS YOUR BODYGUARD, I MUST PREPARE YOU FOR THE WORST. 8 00:00:19,102 --> 00:00:21,104 YOUR FATHER IS MOST LIKELY DEAD. 9 00:00:21,187 --> 00:00:24,649 HE WAS CRUSHED TO DEATH BY A DISCO BALL, AND HIS LIFELESS 10 00:00:24,733 --> 00:00:26,860 HUSK WAS TAKEN BY THE MONARCH. 11 00:00:26,943 --> 00:00:29,696 YOUR GODFATHERS HAVE THE REST OF THE INFO. 12 00:00:29,779 --> 00:00:31,114 GET IN, SON. 13 00:00:31,197 --> 00:00:32,866 WELCOME TO TANGIER. 14 00:00:32,949 --> 00:00:36,119 THEY WILL RAISE YOU AS THEIR OWN SONS FROM HERE ON OUT. 15 00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:39,247 AFTER I WRITE THESE NOTES, I PLAN ON SHOOTING MYSELF, THEN 16 00:00:39,330 --> 00:00:41,458 BURNING THE VENTURE ESTATE DOWN. 17 00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:44,794 NOT REALLY, BUT, AGAIN, THAT WOULD BE THE WORST, AND I WANT 18 00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:47,797 TO PREPARE YOU FOR THE WORST, 'CAUSE I LOVE YOU BOTH. 19 00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:49,424 UNCLE VATRED. 20 00:00:49,507 --> 00:00:50,175 OH, GOOD. 21 00:00:50,258 --> 00:00:51,092 YOU'RE UP. HERE. 22 00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:53,595 PUT THIS ON AND MEET ME OUT BACK. 23 00:00:53,678 --> 00:00:56,306 OH, AND, UH, WELCOME TO BOCA RATON. 24 00:00:56,389 --> 00:01:01,352 [ CHUCKLES ] SON. 25 00:01:01,436 --> 00:01:02,562 POOR LITTLE GUY. 26 00:01:02,645 --> 00:01:04,522 Hank: IS THAT YOUR...PET? 27 00:01:04,606 --> 00:01:05,899 BLACKIE DIED 15 YEARS AGO. 28 00:01:05,982 --> 00:01:08,860 THAT'S ENTMANN -- FIRST OF TEAM VENTURE TO GO. 29 00:01:08,943 --> 00:01:10,945 Hank: GOSH, I'M AWFUL SORRY. 30 00:01:11,029 --> 00:01:13,865 "YOU ARE MY PAL, AND YOU ARE MY FRIEND. 31 00:01:13,948 --> 00:01:16,618 AND YOUR WEIRD BODY, TO HEAVEN, I SEND. 32 00:01:16,701 --> 00:01:20,163 WHEN YOU WERE MASSIVE AND FULL OF SIZE, YOU GAVE ME COUNCIL, 33 00:01:20,246 --> 00:01:21,831 BECAUSE YOU WERE WISE. 34 00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:24,125 SAYING, 'ACTION MAN, TAKE IT DOWN A NOTCH. 35 00:01:24,209 --> 00:01:27,420 STOP JUST THINKING WITH YOUR ACTION CROTCH.' 36 00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:31,216 AND WHEN YOU WERE SHRUNK DOWN TO A LITTLE MOLE, YOU WERE ABLE TO 37 00:01:31,299 --> 00:01:32,926 SWIM LAPS IN A LITTLE BOWL. 38 00:01:33,009 --> 00:01:36,179 NOW YOU ARE DEAD 'CAUSE OF MY CHAIR. 39 00:01:36,262 --> 00:01:38,681 I HAD NO IDEA THAT YOU WERE THERE. 40 00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:43,645 WHEN I ROCKED BACK IN REPOSE, YOU DIED AND BEGAN TO 41 00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:45,021 DECOMPOSE." 42 00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:48,358 [ SNIFFLES ] [ ZIP ] 43 00:01:48,441 --> 00:01:49,275 Hank: DUDE! 44 00:01:49,359 --> 00:01:50,527 WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! 45 00:01:50,610 --> 00:01:51,986 VENTURE TRADITION, SON. 46 00:01:52,070 --> 00:01:53,696 [ ZIP ] Hank: OH. UH, SHOULD I -- 47 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:54,447 NOPE. 48 00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:55,740 YOU'RE THE YOUNGEST HERE. 49 00:01:55,824 --> 00:01:57,867 YOU GOT TO FERTILIZE THE GROUND TO REPRESENT NEW LIFE. 50 00:01:57,951 --> 00:02:00,036 DROP 'EM AND SQUAT. 51 00:02:00,119 --> 00:02:00,912 NOW, NOW, SON. 52 00:02:00,995 --> 00:02:02,789 THAT'S NOT A NAPKIN, THAT'S BREAD. 53 00:02:02,872 --> 00:02:04,624 YOU SCOOP UP YOUR COUSCOUS WITH IT. 54 00:02:04,707 --> 00:02:05,542 Dean: SORRY. 55 00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:06,668 I'M USED TO BREAD-SHAPED BREAD. 56 00:02:06,751 --> 00:02:07,585 DON'T DRINK THAT. 57 00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:08,920 DYSENTERY. 58 00:02:09,003 --> 00:02:11,506 YOU'LL BE CRAPPING YOUR BRAINS OUT ALL OVER MY ANTIQUES. 59 00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:13,216 YOU'LL LEARN THE CUSTOMS HERE IN NO TIME. 60 00:02:13,299 --> 00:02:14,968 Dean: I HOPE I DON'T HAVE TO. 61 00:02:15,051 --> 00:02:17,220 I REALLY THINK MY DAD'S OKAY, MR. GENTLEMAN. 62 00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:18,721 "MR. GENTLEMAN"? 63 00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:19,722 YOU CALL ME POP-POP. 64 00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:22,559 REBUILDING TEAM VENTURE, OLD MAN? 65 00:02:22,642 --> 00:02:24,727 OR JUST FOUND YOURSELF A NEW PLAYTHING? 66 00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:26,813 HEY, YOU REMEMBER ME, DO YOU, LADDIE? 67 00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:29,566 SO, YOU MIGHT WANT TO SHOW ME A LITTLE MORE RESPECT. 68 00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:30,942 RESPECT? 69 00:02:31,025 --> 00:02:33,736 YOU CLOWNS WERE A JOKE EVEN BEFORE THE ACTION MAN WENT TO 70 00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:34,237 REHAB. 71 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:35,238 SORRY. 72 00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:36,823 THE OLD EARS DON'T HEAR SO GOOD ANYMORE. 73 00:02:36,906 --> 00:02:37,699 WHAT WAS THAT? 74 00:02:37,782 --> 00:02:38,992 YOU HEARD ME. 75 00:02:39,075 --> 00:02:41,911 DEAN, BE A GOOD BOY AND GO PICK A SONG ON THE JUKEBOX. 76 00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,497 THIS MAN WANTS TO DANCE WITH YOUR POP-POP. 77 00:02:44,581 --> 00:02:45,582 Dean: OKAY. 78 00:02:45,665 --> 00:02:47,834 HE'S A LITTLE YOUNG...EVEN FOR YOU. 79 00:02:47,917 --> 00:02:49,961 ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO HAVE A FIGHT? 80 00:02:50,044 --> 00:02:51,880 'CAUSE I'M ONLY GO USE A THUMB. 81 00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:52,881 UH...THE LEFT ONE. 82 00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:55,216 THE RIGHT ONE'S TOO POWERFUL FOR YOU. 83 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:58,595 I'D LOVE TO SEE THAT. 84 00:02:58,678 --> 00:03:02,599 [ YELLS ] [ BREATHING SHAKILY ] 85 00:03:02,682 --> 00:03:05,268 I DIDN'T SPECIFY MY THUMB. 86 00:03:06,936 --> 00:03:10,648 [ RUSTLING ] #21: I KNOW YOU'RE THERE. 87 00:03:10,732 --> 00:03:12,609 YOU MOVE, AND I SHOOT. 88 00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:13,818 OH, NO, GARY. 89 00:03:13,902 --> 00:03:16,029 PLEASE DON'T SHOOT ME WITH YOUR STICK. 90 00:03:16,112 --> 00:03:17,906 #21: EH, IT'S ALL I -- YEAH, BLAH, BLAH. 91 00:03:17,989 --> 00:03:18,781 LOOK, I NEED YOUR HELP. 92 00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:19,824 #21: HOW'D YOU FIND ME? 93 00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:22,118 IDIOT, YOU'RE CAMPING ON OUR PROPERTY. 94 00:03:22,201 --> 00:03:23,328 HOW DUMB DO YOU THINK I AM? 95 00:03:23,411 --> 00:03:24,704 #21: UH, VERY? 96 00:03:24,787 --> 00:03:26,748 YEAH, I'D LOVE TO KEEP PLAYING THIS GAME WITH YOU, BUT 97 00:03:26,831 --> 00:03:28,124 WE GOT PROBLEMS. 98 00:03:28,207 --> 00:03:29,459 THE MONARCH HAS DOC. 99 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:31,002 #21: HOW DID THAT HAPPEN? 100 00:03:31,085 --> 00:03:33,087 DOC CRASHED A PARTY AT DON HELL'S. 101 00:03:33,171 --> 00:03:33,922 #21: WHOA! 102 00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:34,547 NOT SMART. 103 00:03:34,631 --> 00:03:35,673 VILLAIN NIGHTCLUB. 104 00:03:35,757 --> 00:03:36,633 BAD PEOPLE IN THERE. 105 00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:38,092 SO, ARE YOU IN? 106 00:03:38,176 --> 00:03:41,012 I KNOW IT'S TOUCHY FOR YOU, AND YOU'LL PROBABLY BABY OUT ON ME, 107 00:03:41,095 --> 00:03:43,556 BUT I ALSO KNOW THAT YOU'RE A GOOD MAN...UNDER ALL THAT PUDGE. 108 00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,016 #21: YEAH, I'M PUDGY. 109 00:03:45,099 --> 00:03:47,810 AND YOU'RE WEARING A BULLETPROOF VEST YOU MADE FROM AN OLD COUCH, 110 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:48,728 I ASSUME. 111 00:03:48,811 --> 00:03:49,687 YEAH, I'M IN. 112 00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:51,272 LET'S BRING HIM HOME. 113 00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,942 [ MIMICS GUN COCK ] DID YOU JUST COCK YOUR STICK? 114 00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:54,943 #21: YEAH. WHATEVER. 115 00:03:55,026 --> 00:03:56,069 SO, I JUST -- SO, WHAT? 116 00:03:56,152 --> 00:03:57,153 Monarch: SO, YOU READY? 117 00:03:57,236 --> 00:03:59,030 I AM GONNA WET MYSELF. 118 00:03:59,113 --> 00:04:00,156 CALM DOWN! 119 00:04:00,239 --> 00:04:01,449 I'M ALMOST DONE. 120 00:04:01,532 --> 00:04:03,076 Monarch: HEY, WHAT ABOUT PUTTING HIM IN THE ONE WITH A 121 00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:05,370 HUNGRY RAT IN A CAGE THAT HE WEARS AS A MASK? 122 00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:06,829 IT'LL EAT HIS NOSE. 123 00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:10,041 I TOLD YOU, RATS, PIRANHAS, SHARKS, AND BADGERS ARE TOO MUCH 124 00:04:10,124 --> 00:04:10,583 HASSLE. 125 00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:11,334 NO ANIMALS. 126 00:04:11,417 --> 00:04:12,502 Monarch: OKAY! 127 00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:15,922 HEY, WHAT ABOUT JUST STRAIGHT-UP FLAYING, HUH? 128 00:04:16,005 --> 00:04:18,633 BUT AS A SINISTER TWIST -- ICE KNIFE? 129 00:04:18,716 --> 00:04:19,926 OH, PUT THAT ONE DOWN. 130 00:04:20,009 --> 00:04:21,511 JUST WAIT FOR ME TO FINISH. 131 00:04:21,594 --> 00:04:22,512 Monarch: I CAN'T WAIT. 132 00:04:22,595 --> 00:04:24,222 I'M SO EXCITED! 133 00:04:24,305 --> 00:04:24,931 ALL RIGHT. 134 00:04:25,014 --> 00:04:25,932 ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. 135 00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:26,724 CALM DOWN, NOW. 136 00:04:26,808 --> 00:04:28,601 WORK ON THE OLD LIST. 137 00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:30,603 NIFTY, NIFTY LITTLE LISTY. 138 00:04:30,687 --> 00:04:32,939 NUMBER 15 -- ICE KNIFE. 139 00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:35,566 [ SIGHS ] OKAY, I'M CALM NOW. 140 00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:36,526 EVERYTHING'S COOL. 141 00:04:36,609 --> 00:04:37,694 GOOD. 142 00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:41,781 Monarch: BROKEN GLASS IN EARS, QUESTION MARK. 143 00:04:41,864 --> 00:04:42,740 I JUST PEED MYSELF A LITTLE. 144 00:04:42,824 --> 00:04:44,117 SWEETIE, PLEASE, RELAX. 145 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:45,827 Dr. Venture: I REALLY APPRECIATE THIS. 146 00:04:45,910 --> 00:04:48,538 I'M ONLY DOING IT 'CAUSE IT'S AGAINST GUILD REGULATIONS TO 147 00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:50,498 TORTURE SOMEBODY WITH AN UNATTENDED INJURY. 148 00:04:50,581 --> 00:04:52,166 Dr. Venture: YEAH, NOT BUYING IT. 149 00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,127 I KNOW YOU'RE THE SOFTIE HERE. 150 00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:55,753 NOT MY FIRST TIME AT THE RODEO. 151 00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:56,713 RODEO'S OVER, BALDY. 152 00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:58,214 YOU'RE HOG-TIED. 153 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,591 I'M JUST WAITING FOR MY HUSBAND TO PICK OUT A BARBECUE SAUCE TO 154 00:05:00,675 --> 00:05:01,259 SPREAD ON YOU. 155 00:05:01,342 --> 00:05:02,093 Dr. Venture: OW! 156 00:05:02,176 --> 00:05:04,220 YEAH, DISLOCATED. FIGURED. 157 00:05:04,303 --> 00:05:06,764 Dr. Venture: [ SIGHS ] I KNOW YOU CLOWNS AREN'T GONNA 158 00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:07,348 DO ANYTHING. 159 00:05:07,432 --> 00:05:08,808 YOU NEVER DO. 160 00:05:08,891 --> 00:05:11,394 YEAH, HE MAY NOT BE VERY GOOD AT IT, BUT HE LOVES IT, AND I 161 00:05:11,477 --> 00:05:13,062 LOVE HIM, SO YOU BETTER PLAY ALONG. 162 00:05:13,146 --> 00:05:15,565 Dr. Venture: HOW ABOUT YOU POP MY HIP BACK IN PLACE, AND I 163 00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:17,066 SEND YOU A LITTLE TAX-FREE DONATION? 164 00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,861 YOU ARE GONNA CRY IN AGONY IF MY HUSBAND TICKLES YOU. 165 00:05:19,944 --> 00:05:22,905 YOU WILL PLEA FOR YOUR LIFE IF HE GIVES YOU A BACK RUB. 166 00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:26,534 YOU WILL TRY TO ESCAPE JUST SO HE CAN CATCH YOU. 167 00:05:26,617 --> 00:05:28,077 Dr. Venture: WHY...WOULD I DO THAT? 168 00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:31,581 BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T, I WILL STRAIGHT-UP JUST SLIT YOUR 169 00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:32,957 THROAT. 170 00:05:33,041 --> 00:05:35,126 Dr. Venture: [ CHUCKLES ] NO, NO. YOU WOULDN'T DO THAT. 171 00:05:35,209 --> 00:05:38,629 DON'T UNDERESTIMATE A WOMAN IN LOVE, DR. VENTURE. 172 00:05:38,713 --> 00:05:40,506 SO, YOU ALLERGIC TO EPINEPHRINE? 173 00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:42,717 Dr. Venture: NO, I'M NOT ALLERGIC TO ANY ANESTHETICS. 174 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:46,554 AND I'M NOT ALLERGIC TO HAND LOTION, IF YOU, UH, WANT TO GIVE 175 00:05:46,637 --> 00:05:48,264 ME A HAPPY ENDING. 176 00:05:48,347 --> 00:05:49,432 NAH. 177 00:05:49,515 --> 00:05:51,100 [ CRACK ] Dr. Venture: [ SCREAMS ] 178 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:52,643 Monarch: DON'T START WITHOUT ME! 179 00:05:52,727 --> 00:05:53,603 ALL RIGHT. 180 00:05:53,686 --> 00:05:55,605 NOW, JUST LIKE WE REHEARSED, OKAY? 181 00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:56,814 THAT'S HER. 182 00:05:56,898 --> 00:05:59,609 THAT DELICIOUS PIECE OF RANDY CANDY OVER THERE. 183 00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:01,611 Hank: CHECK. 184 00:06:01,694 --> 00:06:02,987 HELLO, ROSE. 185 00:06:03,071 --> 00:06:06,115 UH, MIND IF I -- YES, I WAS JUST LEAVING 186 00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:06,824 ANYWAY. 187 00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:09,494 [ SIGHS ] OKAY. 188 00:06:09,577 --> 00:06:10,119 OH, DEAR. 189 00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:11,788 WHAT IS THE MATTER? 190 00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:13,748 OH, IT'S BEEN A HECK OF A YEAR, ROSE. 191 00:06:13,831 --> 00:06:17,835 I-I LOST MY WIFE, MY BEST FRIEND, AND NOW MY -- MY SON IS 192 00:06:17,919 --> 00:06:19,712 HOOKED ON ROCK 'N' ROLL. 193 00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:20,797 ROCK 'N' ROLL?! 194 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:22,632 RODNEY, THAT'S THE DEVIL'S MUSIC. 195 00:06:22,715 --> 00:06:24,008 Hank: HEY, OLD MAN. 196 00:06:24,092 --> 00:06:27,136 I WAS JUST PLAYING MY BASS AT A VOLUME THAT'S UNREASONABLE. 197 00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:29,764 CAN YOU GIVE ME SOME MONEY TO BUY RECORDS WITH CLEAR WARNING 198 00:06:29,847 --> 00:06:30,515 LABELS? 199 00:06:30,598 --> 00:06:31,474 OH, ROSE. 200 00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:33,142 YOU GOT TO HELP ME STRAIGHTEN HIM OUT. 201 00:06:33,226 --> 00:06:35,978 Hank: YOU AIN'T NEVER GONNA STOP ME FROM OVERLY SEXUALIZED 202 00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:38,147 DANCING AND DRESSING LIKE AN INDIGENT. 203 00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:39,607 LOUD ROCK MUSIC! 204 00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:41,734 THE DEVIL HAS A GRIP ON YOU. 205 00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:44,028 YOU'VE GOT TO FIGHT HIM, SWEETIE. 206 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,822 YOU HAVE TO FIGHT HIM WITH SHOW TUNES. 207 00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:47,198 Hank: SHOW TUNES? 208 00:06:47,281 --> 00:06:49,909 IF I PLAY THEM BACKWARDS, WILL THEY MAKE ME WANT TO TRY REEFER 209 00:06:49,992 --> 00:06:51,119 CIGARETTE MARIJUANAS? 210 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:52,411 OH, HEAVEN'S NO. 211 00:06:52,495 --> 00:06:54,789 THEY WILL MAKE YOU WANT TO SOLVE PROBLEMS IN SONG. 212 00:06:54,872 --> 00:06:56,165 AND WITH DANCING. 213 00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:59,669 Hank: GOSH, I THINK I'D LIKE TO GET HOOKED ON SHOW TUNES NOW. 214 00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:01,671 I'VE BEEN SO WRONG ABOUT EVERYTHING. 215 00:07:01,754 --> 00:07:03,714 YOU'RE THE BEST FATHER IN THE WORLD! 216 00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:04,841 AW, SHUCKS, SON. 217 00:07:04,924 --> 00:07:07,093 I COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT ROSE, HERE. 218 00:07:07,176 --> 00:07:09,095 Hank: YOU SURE DO MAKE A GREAT TEAM. 219 00:07:09,178 --> 00:07:11,931 HEY, POP, MAYBE SHE'D LIKE TO HAVE DINNER WITH US? 220 00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:13,141 OH, DON'T BE SILLY. 221 00:07:13,224 --> 00:07:15,685 I'M SURE ROSE IS VERY -- OH, YES, YOUNG MAN. 222 00:07:15,768 --> 00:07:17,979 I WOULD LOVE TO DINE WITH YOU. 223 00:07:18,062 --> 00:07:21,649 SO, YOU START THE WATCH WHEN SALEM COMES ON SCREEN, THEN STOP 224 00:07:21,732 --> 00:07:23,025 IT WHEN HE'S OFF. 225 00:07:23,109 --> 00:07:25,695 THEN YOU WRITE THE TIME DOWN AND INDICATE WHETHER IT WAS THAT 226 00:07:25,778 --> 00:07:27,405 CRAPPY PUPPET OR AN ACTUAL CAT. 227 00:07:27,488 --> 00:07:31,033 Dean: ARE ALL THESE TAPES "SABRINA, THE TEENAGE WITCH"? 228 00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:32,201 WELL, OBVIOUSLY, SON. 229 00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:34,579 IT'S THE ONLY SHOW THAT STARRED SALEM THE CAT. 230 00:07:34,662 --> 00:07:37,290 NOW, ONCE YOU FINISH THAT, YOU GET TO TAKE DICTATION FOR 231 00:07:37,373 --> 00:07:39,917 "I GENTLEMAN," THE THIRD INSTALLMENT OF MY 232 00:07:40,001 --> 00:07:43,462 AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL THRILLOGY. 233 00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:44,797 #21: OH, LOOK AT THIS PLACE. 234 00:07:44,881 --> 00:07:45,673 NOTHING CHANGED. 235 00:07:45,756 --> 00:07:46,799 KEPT IT JUST THE WAY I LEFT IT. 236 00:07:46,883 --> 00:07:48,968 HEY, HOW FAR IS THE FLOOR FROM MY FEET? 237 00:07:49,051 --> 00:07:50,428 #21: OH, LIKE A YARD. 238 00:07:50,511 --> 00:07:52,972 AW, THEY GOT ME A GUILD CALAMITY CONFERENCE SHIRT. 239 00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:53,931 [ THUD ] [ GRUNTS ] 240 00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:55,558 YARD. THAT WAS LIKE 5 FEET. 241 00:07:55,641 --> 00:07:57,894 #21: AWW, IT SAYS I'M HIS BEST HENCHMAN. 242 00:07:57,977 --> 00:07:59,103 IT'S A T-SHIRT. SO WHAT? 243 00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:00,146 YOU GOT ANY WEAPONS? 244 00:08:00,229 --> 00:08:01,439 #21: UNDER THE BED. 245 00:08:01,522 --> 00:08:03,649 THE VENTURES NEVER GAVE ME A T-SHIRT. 246 00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:05,067 BOO-HOO. 247 00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:07,904 I TATTOOED A "V" ON MY FACE, AND I STILL GOT TO PAY FOR MY OWN 248 00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:08,571 FOOD. 249 00:08:08,654 --> 00:08:09,739 WHERE'S YOUR COSTUME? 250 00:08:09,822 --> 00:08:10,740 #21: WHY DO YOU DO IT? 251 00:08:10,823 --> 00:08:11,866 WHAT? BODYGUARD? 252 00:08:11,949 --> 00:08:13,242 IT'S ALL THE SAME. 253 00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:16,787 SERGEANT HATRED, UNCLE VATRED -- SAME OLD WAR HORSE FIGHTING FOR 254 00:08:16,871 --> 00:08:17,914 WHAT HE CARES ABOUT. 255 00:08:17,997 --> 00:08:19,540 #21: WELL, WHAT DO YOU CARE ABOUT? 256 00:08:19,624 --> 00:08:20,833 FIGHTING. 257 00:08:20,917 --> 00:08:22,668 YEAH, JUST POINT ME AT A CAUSE, AND I'LL DO THE REST. 258 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:24,629 #21: YOU KNOW, I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE SO SIMILAR. 259 00:08:24,712 --> 00:08:25,963 HOW COME WE NEVER GOT CLOSE? 260 00:08:26,047 --> 00:08:28,591 'CAUSE I DON'T TRUST YOU, AND 'CAUSE YOU'RE A DORK. 261 00:08:28,674 --> 00:08:30,009 AND THIS IS A TOY CHEST. 262 00:08:30,092 --> 00:08:32,845 #21: THAT'S A DISPLAY CABINET FOR COLLECTIBLES, MY FRIEND. 263 00:08:32,929 --> 00:08:33,930 IT'S AT THE BOTTOM. 264 00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:35,223 THAT'S MY OLD ONE. 265 00:08:35,306 --> 00:08:36,807 IT MIGHT STILL SMELL LIKE SOUP. 266 00:08:36,891 --> 00:08:37,975 [ GRUNTS ] THAT'S HORRIBLE. 267 00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:38,809 WHAT IS THAT? 268 00:08:38,893 --> 00:08:39,936 #21: SOUP. 269 00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:40,811 Monarch: OKAY. 270 00:08:40,895 --> 00:08:41,771 I'M SO READY. 271 00:08:41,854 --> 00:08:42,605 LET'S DO THIS. 272 00:08:42,688 --> 00:08:43,731 YOU WANT TO REHEARSE AGAIN? 273 00:08:43,814 --> 00:08:45,524 Monarch: NO, I GOT THIS ONE DOWN. 274 00:08:45,608 --> 00:08:47,777 YOU JUST GOT TO REMEMBER THAT AFTER I DO THE SINISTER LAUGH, 275 00:08:47,860 --> 00:08:49,946 YOU HAVE TO CROSS YOUR ARMS AND LOOK AT ME LIKE I'M THE SHIT. 276 00:08:50,029 --> 00:08:51,948 YOU WANT ME TO DO THE, UH... 277 00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:52,990 Monarch: NO, NO. 278 00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:53,866 THAT'S TOO "KING AND I." 279 00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:55,117 KEEP IT BELIEVABLE. 280 00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:57,912 [ BUZZING LIPS ] HE FIGHTS THE ZEITGEIST WITH 281 00:08:57,995 --> 00:08:59,038 POLITE MIGHT. 282 00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:01,040 [ BUZZING LIPS ] [ INHALES ] 283 00:09:01,123 --> 00:09:01,832 OKAY. 284 00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:03,376 SHOWTIME. 285 00:09:03,459 --> 00:09:07,129 [ CLANK ] HELLO, DR. VENTURE. 286 00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,798 ARE YOU PREPARED TO DIE?! 287 00:09:08,881 --> 00:09:09,715 Dr. Venture: WHO'S THERE? 288 00:09:09,799 --> 00:09:10,466 Monarch: OH. 289 00:09:10,549 --> 00:09:11,717 WHY DID YOU BLINDFOLD HIM?! 290 00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:13,594 I'M ALL DRESSED UP! 291 00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:19,892 WE SIMPLY NAIL A MAN'S BALLS TO A CHAIR. 292 00:09:19,976 --> 00:09:21,602 WHERE IS THE POETRY? 293 00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:25,147 AH, IN THE EAST, THEY KNOW THE EXQUISITE BEAUTY OF TORTURE. 294 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:28,150 THERE THEY'VE TURNED A SOUND THAT MAKES VIRGINS WEEP INTO A 295 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:30,820 SOUND THAT MAKES A MAN ROAR WITH SUFFERING. 296 00:09:30,903 --> 00:09:32,071 Dr. Venture: WHAT? 297 00:09:32,154 --> 00:09:33,656 CAN'T HEAR SQUAT IN HERE. 298 00:09:33,739 --> 00:09:34,448 WHERE AM I? 299 00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:35,700 Monarch: THE BELL! 300 00:09:35,783 --> 00:09:38,703 [ LAUGHS MANIACALLY ] Dr. Venture: LaBELLE? 301 00:09:38,786 --> 00:09:39,370 PATTI LaBELLE? 302 00:09:39,453 --> 00:09:40,705 Monarch: A BELL! 303 00:09:40,788 --> 00:09:43,708 WHEN RUNG AT FULL PEAL, THE VIBRATIONS PIERCE THE BODY LIKE 304 00:09:43,791 --> 00:09:47,545 SHARP KNIVES THAT PULL AT THE MUSCLES AND BURST THE VEINS. 305 00:09:47,628 --> 00:09:50,881 THE BONES TWIST AND CRACK IN RELATIVE SILENCE TO THE CRIES 306 00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:52,883 OF...THE BELL! 307 00:09:52,967 --> 00:09:58,264 [ LAUGHS MANIACALLY ] [ BELL RINGING ] 308 00:09:58,347 --> 00:09:59,598 RIGHT THERE. 309 00:09:59,682 --> 00:10:01,517 I PAY HOW MUCH TO LIVE IN A GATED NEIGHBORHOOD, AND SOME 310 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,894 LOSER CRANKS A MIKE OLDFIELD ALBUM? 311 00:10:03,978 --> 00:10:05,146 WHAT'S NEXT -- PINK FLOYD?! 312 00:10:05,229 --> 00:10:10,943 [ RINGING CONTINUES ] HAVE ANOTHER TOKE, HIPPIE. 313 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:11,944 Monarch: WHAT? NOTHING?! 314 00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:12,945 ARE YOU SERIOUS? 315 00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:14,196 Dr. Venture: WHAT CAN I TELL YOU? 316 00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:16,574 I SPENT MOST OF MY CHILDHOOD IN A SUPERSONIC JET. 317 00:10:16,657 --> 00:10:19,035 [ CLEARS THROAT ] Dr. Venture: OH, I MEAN, OH! 318 00:10:19,118 --> 00:10:20,786 I THINK MY KIDNEYS BURST! 319 00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:23,581 PLEASE, NO MORE BURSTING OF MY...KIDNEYS. 320 00:10:23,664 --> 00:10:27,043 Monarch: [ SIGHS ] THE BELL, DOT, DOT, DOT, SUCKS. 321 00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:30,087 THREE EXCLAMATION POINTS. 322 00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:31,964 YOU'RE FINISHED, BRAINULO! 323 00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:34,717 BY NOW, JONAS AND OTTO HAVE REALIGNED THE MISSILE. 324 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:36,093 IT'S OVER. 325 00:10:36,177 --> 00:10:38,888 YOU MAY HAVE BESTED MY JUDO LIZARDS, BUT YOU WON'T FARE 326 00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:40,931 AS WELL WITH YOUR NEXT OPPONENTS. 327 00:10:41,015 --> 00:10:43,017 WE WON'T FIGHT EACH OTHER, BRAINULO! 328 00:10:43,100 --> 00:10:44,352 E-EACH OTHER? 329 00:10:44,435 --> 00:10:46,062 OH...I WISH I THOUGHT OF THAT. 330 00:10:46,145 --> 00:10:48,606 OH, IT REALLY SEEMS OBVIOUS NOW, DOESN'T IT? 331 00:10:48,689 --> 00:10:50,524 IT'S ALL BUT A CLICHé, YOU IDIOT. 332 00:10:50,608 --> 00:10:51,734 HOW DID YOU MISS THAT? 333 00:10:51,817 --> 00:10:53,027 I DON'T KNOW. 334 00:10:53,110 --> 00:10:55,738 BUT I DID COME UP WITH SOMETHING MORE SINISTER. 335 00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:57,281 PREPARE YOURSELF TO FIGHT... 336 00:10:57,365 --> 00:11:00,910 YOUR CRUSHES -- TRIPLE THREAT AND JASS. 337 00:11:00,993 --> 00:11:02,411 NOBODY FOR HUMONGOLOID? 338 00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:03,913 BE REALISTIC, BIG GUY. 339 00:11:03,996 --> 00:11:05,790 YOU'RE SWEET ON JASS, REALLY? 340 00:11:05,873 --> 00:11:07,124 LOOK AT HIM. 341 00:11:07,208 --> 00:11:09,919 HE'S LIKE A BLADE OF SEXUAL GRASS SWAYING IN THE BREEZE. 342 00:11:10,002 --> 00:11:11,921 ARROW STRAIGHT, BELIEVE IT OR NOT. 343 00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:13,297 SO, TRIPLE THREAT? 344 00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:14,965 IT'S THAT GOODY-GOODY THING. 345 00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:18,427 I JUST WANT TO GET ALL ANIMAL ON HER AND SHOW HER MY FILTH. 346 00:11:18,511 --> 00:11:20,763 [ DOORBELL RINGS ] WAS THAT THE DOORBELL? 347 00:11:20,846 --> 00:11:21,555 Hank: I THINK SO. 348 00:11:21,639 --> 00:11:22,515 DO YOU WANT TO STOP HERE? 349 00:11:22,598 --> 00:11:23,641 [ DOG BARKING ] MISCHA! 350 00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:24,225 WHO'S THAT, GIRL? 351 00:11:24,308 --> 00:11:25,017 IS THAT KIKI? 352 00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:26,602 IS THAT KIKI? 353 00:11:26,685 --> 00:11:27,978 THAT'S MY PUPPY. 354 00:11:28,062 --> 00:11:29,355 [ DOORBELL RINGS ] THERE'S A GIRL. 355 00:11:29,438 --> 00:11:30,981 [ SNIFFLES ] ALL RIGHT, DEAN. 356 00:11:31,065 --> 00:11:32,149 PUT A PIN IN THAT STORY. 357 00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:33,526 HAVE TO HAVE IT OUT WITH KIKI. 358 00:11:33,609 --> 00:11:36,654 THAT AMBER TRAMP'S BEEN PLAYING ME FOR A FOOL. 359 00:11:36,737 --> 00:11:39,281 I'VE BEEN TRYING TO DRILL ROSE FOR, LIKE, 40 YEARS. 360 00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:40,699 IT'S LIKE A DAMN OBSESSION. 361 00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:43,035 YOU GREASE THOSE GEARS, AND YOU CAN NAME YOUR PRICE. 362 00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:44,370 Hank: ALL RIGHT. 363 00:11:44,453 --> 00:11:47,706 I'M GONNA NEED $50 CASH, StingRay BASS, AND A RIDE HOME, 364 00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:50,584 'CAUSE THIS WHOLE PLACE SMELLS LIKE DINTY MOORE BEEF STEW. 365 00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:52,169 DONE, DONE, AND DONE. 366 00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:53,587 Hank: SUPER SWEAR? 367 00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:56,715 IF YOU CAN GET ME TIME WITH ROSE, I'LL SWEAR ON THE ONLY 368 00:11:56,799 --> 00:11:58,717 THING HOLY TO ME. 369 00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:01,178 Together: GO, TEAM VENTURE. 370 00:12:04,765 --> 00:12:05,808 21? 371 00:12:05,891 --> 00:12:07,893 [ CHUCKLES ] HEY, SO GLAD YOU'RE BACK, MAN. 372 00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:08,686 THIS PLACE SUCKS NOW. 373 00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:09,895 MOPPETS? 374 00:12:09,979 --> 00:12:12,231 DUDE, THEY'RE PRETTY MUCH RUNNING CRAP IN HERE. 375 00:12:12,314 --> 00:12:13,941 [ As #21 ] UH...HELLO. 376 00:12:14,024 --> 00:12:15,484 WHAT'S THAT BLUE STUFF ON YOUR FACE? 377 00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:18,320 IT'S, UH...ICE. ICICLES. 378 00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:20,448 [ GRUNTS ] #21: W-T-FUCK ARE YOU 379 00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:21,532 DOING?! 380 00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:23,159 YOU MADE ME HIT A GUY ON MY SOFTBALL TEAM. 381 00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:25,744 [ Normal voice ] YEAH, THAT WAS -- HEY, YOU SAVED ME. 382 00:12:25,828 --> 00:12:27,163 I DIDN'T THINK YOU WOULD. 383 00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:30,082 #21: OH, DUDE, DON'T GET ALL SARAH McLACHLAN DOG COMMERCIAL 384 00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:31,167 ON ME. 385 00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:32,042 UH, I'M NOT. 386 00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:33,085 I'M JUST... 387 00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:34,253 AWW, GET OVER HERE. 388 00:12:34,336 --> 00:12:35,671 #21: [ SIGHS ] CAN WE HUG LATER? 389 00:12:35,754 --> 00:12:37,840 YOU'VE GOT TO GO TO THE CELL BLOCKS ON THE LOWER LEVEL. 390 00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:38,841 I'M GONNA CHECK THE BRIDGE. 391 00:12:38,924 --> 00:12:39,842 CHECK. 392 00:12:39,925 --> 00:12:41,802 I WON'T LET YOU DOWN... 393 00:12:41,886 --> 00:12:43,262 BUDDY. 394 00:12:45,097 --> 00:12:48,434 WELL, ISN'T THAT INTERESTING. 395 00:12:48,517 --> 00:12:50,561 [ WHIRRING ] Monarch: OH, DON'T WORRY. 396 00:12:50,644 --> 00:12:52,146 I'M NOT GOING INTO THAT CAVITY. 397 00:12:52,229 --> 00:12:53,814 THAT NERVE'S ALREADY DYING. 398 00:12:53,898 --> 00:12:57,359 A LIVE, FRESHLY CUT NERVE IS INFINITELY MORE SENSITIVE. 399 00:12:57,443 --> 00:12:58,527 [ GRUNTS ] Dr. Venture: [ Muffled ] 400 00:12:58,611 --> 00:12:59,528 WHAT? 401 00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:01,572 Monarch: I CAN SMELL YOUR FEAR. 402 00:13:01,655 --> 00:13:04,617 UGH, AND YOUR FEAR SMELLS JUST LIKE CAT FOOD. 403 00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:05,993 UGH! 404 00:13:06,076 --> 00:13:07,578 Dr. Venture: SORRY, I HAD SHRIMP IN GARLIC BUTTER LAST 405 00:13:07,661 --> 00:13:08,412 NIGHT. 406 00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:10,080 Monarch: I-I CAN'T -- UGH. 407 00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:11,790 IT -- IT'S JUST REALLY BAD. 408 00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:14,043 HOW DO YOU EVEN STAND HAVING THAT BE YOUR MOUTH? 409 00:13:14,126 --> 00:13:14,710 UGH. 410 00:13:14,793 --> 00:13:15,669 NO. NO. 411 00:13:15,753 --> 00:13:16,795 WELL, THEN JUST GET OUT, THEN! 412 00:13:16,879 --> 00:13:17,796 I'M TIRED OF IT. 413 00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:19,131 [ Moroccan accent ] WHO THIS ONE? 414 00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:21,133 HIM NEW LOVER FOR MR. GENTLEMAN? 415 00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,218 THAT'S MY SON. 416 00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:24,762 ARE YOU LEAVING, OR SHOULD I THROW YOU OUT? 417 00:13:24,845 --> 00:13:26,055 NO. KIKI LEAVE. 418 00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:27,723 KIKI HAVE NEW MAN. 419 00:13:27,806 --> 00:13:29,517 GREAT! HAVE FUN. 420 00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:32,645 MAYBE WHEN HE KICKS HIS COKE HABIT, YOUR NEW MAN WILL KICK 421 00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:36,815 YOU LIKE HE DOES ALL HIS BOYS! 422 00:13:37,858 --> 00:13:41,570 Dean: I...UM...I ARRANGED THE FIRST TWO CHAPTERS FOR YOU AND 423 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:43,405 THEN MADE A CHAPTER FOR YOUR LISTS. 424 00:13:43,489 --> 00:13:44,240 YES. 425 00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:46,617 YES, LET'S GET BACK TO MY LISTS. 426 00:13:46,700 --> 00:13:48,160 Dean: IF YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS -- 427 00:13:48,244 --> 00:13:50,955 COLONEL GENTLEMAN'S LIST OF THINGS NOT TO DO. 428 00:13:51,038 --> 00:13:54,583 NUMBER ONE -- GET INVOLVED WITH A PERSON 1/3 YOUR AGE. 429 00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:55,834 YOU HEAR ME, DEAN? 430 00:13:55,918 --> 00:13:58,295 Dean: UH, I CAN SAFELY PROMISE THAT I WON'T GET 431 00:13:58,379 --> 00:13:59,755 INVOLVED WITH A 6-YEAR-OLD. 432 00:13:59,838 --> 00:14:02,758 NUMBER TWO -- RETIRE TO A COUNTRY WHERE YOUR SEXUAL 433 00:14:02,841 --> 00:14:04,593 PREFERENCE IS A CAPITAL OFFENSE. 434 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:07,555 NUMBER THREE -- STAY PAST YOUR WELCOME. 435 00:14:07,638 --> 00:14:09,682 THIS PLACE USED TO BE A PARADISE. 436 00:14:09,765 --> 00:14:12,393 THAT PRETTY PEACOCK YVES SAINT LAURENT LIVED RIGHT 437 00:14:12,476 --> 00:14:13,602 THERE. 438 00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:17,523 BURROUGHS, CAPOTE, FORBES, KEROUAC, GINSBERG -- AH, 439 00:14:17,606 --> 00:14:20,401 GINSBERG, THAT EAGER LITTLE PUPPY. 440 00:14:20,484 --> 00:14:21,360 I MISS 'EM. 441 00:14:21,443 --> 00:14:23,237 THEY'RE ALL GONE, DEAN. 442 00:14:23,320 --> 00:14:24,446 AND HERE I AM. 443 00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:25,906 Dean: SHOULD I BE WRITING THIS DOWN? 444 00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:27,783 YES, BUT NOT FOR MY MEMOIRS. 445 00:14:27,866 --> 00:14:30,619 FOR ME, SO I CAN LOOK AT MY LIFE. 446 00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:33,622 WHAT AM I DOING HERE? 447 00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:34,540 DOC? 448 00:14:34,623 --> 00:14:36,083 [ GUN COCKS ] PSST. 449 00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:37,042 Doc? 450 00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:38,085 You in here? 451 00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:39,420 [ GUN COCKS ] LOOKING FOR SOMEONE? 452 00:14:39,503 --> 00:14:40,588 WHERE'S DOC? 453 00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:43,632 HE'S BEING TORTURED BY THE MONARCH AND 21. 454 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:46,051 YOU'RE SUCH A SUCKER, MAN. 455 00:14:46,135 --> 00:14:48,596 FAT BOY BEEN PLAYING YOU THE WHOLE TIME. 456 00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:51,015 HE WOULD NEVER -- YOU'RE LYING! 457 00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:52,224 WHATEVER. 458 00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:54,810 SHOW THIS MAN OUT AND TREAT HIM APPROPRIATELY -- 459 00:14:54,893 --> 00:14:56,895 USE THE GARBAGE CHUTE. 460 00:14:56,979 --> 00:14:58,606 [ YELLS ] 461 00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:01,442 SHOW ME THE GARBAGE CHUTE, WILL YOU? 462 00:15:01,525 --> 00:15:02,735 YOU'RE THE GARBAGE HERE! 463 00:15:02,818 --> 00:15:04,403 YOU'RE A BUNCH OF LYING... 464 00:15:04,486 --> 00:15:06,739 GARBAGE PEOPLE. 465 00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:09,992 #21: WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYBODY? 466 00:15:10,075 --> 00:15:12,369 WELL, HELLO, TRAITOR. 467 00:15:12,453 --> 00:15:14,163 SECURITY TO THE THRONE ROOM. 468 00:15:14,246 --> 00:15:15,873 #21: WELL, LOOK WHO IT IS. 469 00:15:15,956 --> 00:15:19,501 YEAH, I WAS TIPPED OFF BY YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND. 470 00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:21,920 I GAVE HIM DR. VENTURE AND HE SOLD YOU OUT LIKE YOU WERE 471 00:15:22,004 --> 00:15:24,840 NOTHING, SO WHY DON'T YOU PUT THESE ON AND WE'LL GO HAVE A 472 00:15:24,923 --> 00:15:26,008 CHAT WITH THE MONARCH? 473 00:15:26,091 --> 00:15:27,051 #21: ALL RIGHT, YEAH. 474 00:15:27,134 --> 00:15:28,344 LET'S. 475 00:15:28,427 --> 00:15:30,346 LET'S SHOW HIM HOW YOU TWO ARE TAKING OVER THE COCOON. 476 00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:31,722 HE'LL NEVER BELIEVE YOU. 477 00:15:31,805 --> 00:15:35,851 #21: OH, HE'LL BELIEVE HIS BEST HENCHMAN OVER A LYING 478 00:15:35,934 --> 00:15:37,102 MURDERER. 479 00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:38,562 I KNOW IT WAS YOU GUYS. 480 00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:41,899 [ DOOR OPENS ] SEIZE THE TRAITOR! 481 00:15:41,982 --> 00:15:43,025 #21: WAIT! 482 00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:45,277 THE MOPPETS HAVE BROKEN OUR MOST SACRED LAW. 483 00:15:45,361 --> 00:15:47,613 THEY KILLED HENCHMAN 24. 484 00:15:47,696 --> 00:15:49,990 HENCH HAS KILLED HENCH. 485 00:15:50,074 --> 00:15:50,824 HENCH HAS KILLED HENCH. 486 00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:52,034 HENCH HAS KILLED HENCH. 487 00:15:52,117 --> 00:15:55,245 All: [ CHANTING ] HENCH HAS KILLED HENCH... 488 00:15:55,329 --> 00:15:55,954 WE DIDN'T! 489 00:15:56,038 --> 00:15:56,872 HE'S A LIAR AND A TRAITOR! 490 00:15:56,955 --> 00:15:57,706 SEIZE HIM! 491 00:15:57,790 --> 00:15:58,874 All: HENCH HAS KILLED HENCH. 492 00:15:58,957 --> 00:16:00,459 I CAN PROVE HE'S LYING. 493 00:16:00,542 --> 00:16:03,796 IDIOTS! HE'S GETTING AWAY! 494 00:16:03,879 --> 00:16:05,631 Monarch: [ SIGHS ] FORGET IT. 495 00:16:05,714 --> 00:16:07,675 WE LOOKED EVERYWHERE 496 00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:09,218 FOR THAT GODDAMN EXTENSION CORD. 497 00:16:09,301 --> 00:16:10,219 I'M DONE. I'M DONE. 498 00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:11,637 Dr. Venture: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 499 00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:13,555 Monarch: I'M UNTYING YOU AND LETTING YOU GO. 500 00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:15,182 Dr. Venture: ABOUT TIME TEAM VENTURE RESCUED ME. 501 00:16:15,265 --> 00:16:16,809 Monarch: NOBODY CAME TO RESCUE YOU. 502 00:16:16,892 --> 00:16:18,394 LOOK, NOBODY EVEN ANSWERED MY RANSOM CALLS. 503 00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:20,020 Dr. Venture: WELL, MAYBE IF YOU HOLD ME LONGER. 504 00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:22,022 I -- I'M SURE SOMEBODY'S WORKING ON A RESCUE PLAN. 505 00:16:22,106 --> 00:16:22,856 Monarch: FORGET IT. 506 00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:24,983 WE LOSE. WE'RE WASH-UPS. LOSERS. 507 00:16:25,067 --> 00:16:27,152 YOU KNOW MY BEST HENCHMAN LEFT ME? 508 00:16:27,236 --> 00:16:28,112 Dr. Venture: YEAH. 509 00:16:28,195 --> 00:16:29,613 HE'S BEEN HANGING AROUND MY PLACE. 510 00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,407 THAT WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED IF BROCK WAS STILL AROUND. 511 00:16:31,490 --> 00:16:32,991 Monarch: JUST BE HAPPY YOU DON'T HAVE DWARVES TRYING TO 512 00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:34,326 TAKE OVER YOUR LIFE. 513 00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:35,994 Dr. Venture: [ SCOFFS ] YOU HAVEN'T MET MY BROTHER, 514 00:16:36,078 --> 00:16:36,704 APPARENTLY. 515 00:16:36,787 --> 00:16:37,538 Monarch: OH, YEAH. 516 00:16:37,621 --> 00:16:38,580 HE'S REALLY DOING WELL, HUH? 517 00:16:38,664 --> 00:16:39,957 YEAH, I HAVE THAT WITH MY WIFE. 518 00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:42,626 SHE WAS JUST TAPPED FOR THE COUNCIL OF 13, SO MY OLD NUMBER 519 00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:44,712 TWO WILL BE MY BOSS. 520 00:16:44,795 --> 00:16:45,963 Dr. Venture: THAT'S NOTHING. 521 00:16:46,046 --> 00:16:47,756 MY NEW BODYGUARD IS MY OLD ARCHENEMY. 522 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,633 Monarch: [ CHUCKLES ] YEAH, THAT'S MESSED UP. 523 00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:50,759 [ SIGHING ] ALL RIGHT. 524 00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:51,510 WELL... 525 00:16:51,593 --> 00:16:52,553 GUESS YOU SHOULD JUST GO HOME. 526 00:16:52,636 --> 00:16:53,762 CAN YOU EVEN CALL IT A HOME? 527 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:55,472 IS IT JUST A BOX FULL OF MEMORIES? 528 00:16:55,556 --> 00:16:56,932 Dr. Venture: ALL RIGHT. 529 00:16:57,015 --> 00:16:57,891 UM...CAN I GET A RIDE? 530 00:16:57,975 --> 00:16:59,059 Monarch: NO, NO. CAN'T. 531 00:16:59,143 --> 00:17:01,186 I GOT TO TELL THE WIFE YOU ESCAPED AND...WELL, YOU 532 00:17:01,270 --> 00:17:01,937 UNDERSTAND. 533 00:17:02,020 --> 00:17:02,730 Dr. Venture: YEAH, NO. 534 00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:03,731 SO, UH...SHOULD I JUST... 535 00:17:03,814 --> 00:17:05,733 Monarch: YEAH, LET YOURSELF OUT. 536 00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:07,025 UH, BREAK A COUPLE OF THINGS. 537 00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:08,068 MAKE IT LOOK GOOD. 538 00:17:08,152 --> 00:17:09,153 Dr. Venture: GOD. 539 00:17:09,236 --> 00:17:11,572 I LIKED BEING TORTURED MORE THAN THIS HERE. 540 00:17:11,655 --> 00:17:14,616 THIS IS...UGH. 541 00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:17,745 I'M JUST SO DAMN LONELY, ROSE. 542 00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:18,829 LET'S GIVE IT A SHOT. 543 00:17:18,912 --> 00:17:20,914 WE'RE JUST TOO DIFFERENT, RODNEY. 544 00:17:20,998 --> 00:17:22,958 YOU'RE A WOMANIZER AND A JUNKIE. 545 00:17:23,041 --> 00:17:23,751 OH, NO. 546 00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:24,960 THAT ALL ENDED. 547 00:17:25,043 --> 00:17:27,838 I WAS FAITHFUL TO JEANNIE TILL THE DAY SHE DIED. 548 00:17:27,921 --> 00:17:28,714 AND JUNKIE? 549 00:17:28,797 --> 00:17:30,758 I-I WAS A DANG SUPER SOLDIER. 550 00:17:30,841 --> 00:17:33,677 JONAS HAD ME ON JUMP JUICE FOR THE GOOD OF FLAG AND COUNTRY. 551 00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:35,471 I KICKED THAT YEARS AGO. 552 00:17:35,554 --> 00:17:38,515 RODNEY, THAT'S JUST A BUSHEL OF BALONEY. 553 00:17:38,599 --> 00:17:40,809 Hank: [ GASPS ] WAIT A MINUTE. THAT VOICE! 554 00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:43,979 I-I FINALLY FIGURED OUT WHY YOU'RE SO FAMILIAR. 555 00:17:44,062 --> 00:17:45,647 DO YOU HAVE A SON NAMED BILLY? 556 00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:49,443 UH, BIG HEAD, EYE PATCH, METAL HAND, PROBABLY A MIDGET? 557 00:17:49,526 --> 00:17:50,194 YES. 558 00:17:50,277 --> 00:17:52,571 OH, MY LITTLE WATER BABY. 559 00:17:52,654 --> 00:17:54,531 OH, I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM IN YEARS. 560 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:55,824 HE MOVED IN WITH A MAN. 561 00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:58,535 I THINK HE WAS AFRAID I'LL DISAPPROVE OF HIS... 562 00:17:58,619 --> 00:17:59,703 LIFESTYLE CHOICE. 563 00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:01,747 I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE HE IS ANYMORE. 564 00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:02,539 Hank: WELL, I DO. 565 00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:03,916 HE'S MY NEIGHBOR. 566 00:18:03,999 --> 00:18:07,127 HEY, HOW ABOUT YOU TWO COME VISIT ME BACK HOME? 567 00:18:07,211 --> 00:18:11,006 YOU AND UNCLE RODNEY AND MY NEW BASS AND YOUR LITTLE WATER BABY 568 00:18:11,089 --> 00:18:13,050 CAN HAVE A NICE REUNION. 569 00:18:13,133 --> 00:18:13,926 YES. 570 00:18:14,009 --> 00:18:17,137 WELL, THAT SOUNDS JUST ELEGANT. 571 00:18:25,187 --> 00:18:27,022 ALL RIGHT, GARY. 572 00:18:27,105 --> 00:18:29,858 JUDAS. BETRAY ME, WILL YOU? 573 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:32,528 OH, HO, A RECKONING'S COMING, BUDDY. 574 00:18:32,611 --> 00:18:35,197 A RECKONING IS COMING! 575 00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:39,660 SWEETIE, DR. VENTURE ESCAPED! 576 00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:41,411 Monarch: NO, HE DIDN'T. 577 00:18:41,495 --> 00:18:42,204 I LET HIM GO. 578 00:18:42,287 --> 00:18:44,206 WHAT? ARE YOU OKAY? 579 00:18:44,289 --> 00:18:45,749 WHY DID YOU LET HIM GO? 580 00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:47,668 Monarch: BECAUSE I BROKE HIM! 581 00:18:47,751 --> 00:18:49,127 I BROKE HIS WILL! 582 00:18:49,211 --> 00:18:50,546 I BROKE HIS SPIRIT. 583 00:18:50,629 --> 00:18:54,258 OH, MY LOVELY, NAIVE LITTLE GIRL, HOW EASY IT IS TO BREAK A 584 00:18:54,341 --> 00:18:58,512 BONE, BUT TO BREAK A MAN'S HEART -- THAT TAKES GENIUS. 585 00:18:58,595 --> 00:18:59,555 PHYSICAL TORTURE? 586 00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:01,139 WOUNDS HEAL. 587 00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:02,683 BUT MENTAL TORTURE? 588 00:19:02,766 --> 00:19:06,019 THOSE WOUNDS ONLY GROW AND FESTER. 589 00:19:06,103 --> 00:19:09,356 I HAVE CRUSHED DR. VENTURE! 590 00:19:09,439 --> 00:19:13,485 [ LAUGHS MANIACALLY ] YOU KNOW I'M THE SHIT! 591 00:19:13,569 --> 00:19:16,071 I AM SO TURNED ON. 592 00:19:16,154 --> 00:19:17,698 YOU HAVE TO DO ME RIGHT NOW. 593 00:19:17,781 --> 00:19:18,699 Monarch: COME. 594 00:19:18,782 --> 00:19:19,908 SERVICE YOUR EVIL GENIUS. 595 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:22,661 [ DOOR OPENS ] #21: OH, UH...HEY, YOU GUYS. 596 00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:24,621 I'M, UH...I'M HOME? 597 00:19:24,705 --> 00:19:26,582 ATTENTION, GARY. 598 00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:29,293 IT'S YOUR OLD PAL, SERGEANT HATRED. 599 00:19:29,376 --> 00:19:32,629 COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP, OR I WILL -- 600 00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:34,506 OH. OH, THAT'S A MISSILE. 601 00:19:34,590 --> 00:19:35,424 OH, BOY. 602 00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:37,217 THAT IS ON ALL KINDS OF FIRE. 603 00:19:37,301 --> 00:19:40,220 IT'S HEADING FOR THE HOUSE AND IT IS ON FIRE. 604 00:19:40,304 --> 00:19:43,348 GARY, I STILL HATE YOU, BUT YOU GOT TO GET OUT OF THERE! 605 00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:46,435 YOU GOT TO EVACUATE, MAN! 606 00:19:48,353 --> 00:19:50,272 OH, THE HUMANITY! 607 00:19:50,355 --> 00:19:54,443 I-I'M JUST GONNA GO NOW AND, UH...WE'LL PICK THIS UP ANOTHER 608 00:19:54,526 --> 00:19:55,319 TIME. 609 00:19:55,402 --> 00:19:58,363 [ COUGHS ] WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? 610 00:19:58,447 --> 00:20:00,282 Monarch: OUR COCOON. 611 00:20:00,365 --> 00:20:02,326 #21: [ COUGHS ] THAT SUCKED. 612 00:20:02,409 --> 00:20:05,287 Monarch: WHO THE FUCK IS GARY? 613 00:20:05,370 --> 00:20:07,289 [ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ] 614 00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:37,361 [ CAR DOORS CLOSE ] OH, IT'S SO ROMANTIC. 615 00:20:37,444 --> 00:20:39,696 WE'RE MOVING INTO THE HOUSE YOU WERE RAISED IN. 616 00:20:39,780 --> 00:20:41,156 IT'S LIKE A FAIRY TALE. 617 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:43,450 Monarch: UH, IT DIDN'T LOOK QUITE THIS BAD WHEN I WAS A KID. 618 00:20:43,533 --> 00:20:46,161 #21: YEAH, IT LOOKS LIKE THE KIND OF PLACE THAT HAS CREEPY, 619 00:20:46,244 --> 00:20:48,246 WET ASIAN KIDS CRAWLING ON THE CEILING. 620 00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:51,667 HE'S A LYING, TWO-TIMING LITTLE SO-AND-SO, AND I BROKE 621 00:20:51,750 --> 00:20:52,668 BREAD WITH HIM! 622 00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:53,835 I EVEN BROKE HEADS WITH HIM. 623 00:20:53,919 --> 00:20:55,712 Dr. Venture: YOU CAN'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY. 624 00:20:55,796 --> 00:20:57,631 OH, JUST WATCH ME! 625 00:20:57,714 --> 00:20:58,340 Quizboy: JUST PLAY ALONG. 626 00:20:58,423 --> 00:20:59,508 IT'S NOT GONNA KILL YOU. 627 00:20:59,591 --> 00:21:01,051 Pete: WHY WOULD YOU TELL YOUR MOM I'M GAY? 628 00:21:01,134 --> 00:21:02,344 Quizboy: I DIDN'T TELL HER. 629 00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:03,428 I JUST DIDN'T DENY IT. 630 00:21:03,512 --> 00:21:05,472 SHE SENT US THAT CHINA AND THE SIDEBOARD. 631 00:21:05,555 --> 00:21:07,224 WHITE, YOU LOVE THAT SIDEBOARD. 632 00:21:07,307 --> 00:21:09,142 SO, THIS IS PETER. 633 00:21:09,226 --> 00:21:11,395 HE'S AS HANDSOME AS YOU SAID HE WAS, BILLY. 634 00:21:11,478 --> 00:21:13,105 Pete: YOU SAID I WAS HANDSOME? 635 00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:15,691 YEAH, IT'S A LITTLE BROWNSTONE ON CHRISTOPHER 636 00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:16,441 STREET. 637 00:21:16,525 --> 00:21:17,275 YOU CAN BRING ROSE. 638 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:18,735 WHAT DO YOU SAY? 639 00:21:18,819 --> 00:21:21,738 IF YOU DON'T MIND THE SOUND OF OLD PEOPLE HAVING SEX, YOU'VE 640 00:21:21,822 --> 00:21:24,032 GOT YOURSELF A ROOMMATE. 641 00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:25,993 Hank: DEAN, YOU LOOK LIKE SOMEONE DIED. 642 00:21:26,076 --> 00:21:27,577 Dean: THIS IS A FUNERAL, HANK. 643 00:21:27,661 --> 00:21:29,579 Hank: NO, I MEAN, LIKE, ALL THE TIME. 644 00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:31,957 YOU'VE BEEN A MESS THIS WHOLE YEAR, MAN. 645 00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:33,875 YOU'VE GOT TO TELL ME WHAT'S EATING YOU. 646 00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:35,335 Dean: YOU WANT TO KNOW, HANK? 647 00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:36,545 OKAY, FINE. 648 00:21:36,628 --> 00:21:38,505 I'M SICK OF KEEPING IT IN, SO I'LL JUST TELL YOU. 649 00:21:38,588 --> 00:21:42,551 [ SIGHS ] WE...ARE...CLONES, HANK. 650 00:21:42,634 --> 00:21:44,386 OUR WHOLE LIVES -- IT'S A LIE. 651 00:21:44,469 --> 00:21:47,139 WE'RE NOT REALLY HANK AND DEAN ANYMORE. 652 00:21:47,222 --> 00:21:51,560 WE'VE DIED LIKE 13 TIMES, AND NOW WE'RE COPIES OF OURSELVES. 653 00:21:51,643 --> 00:21:53,103 WE'RE CLONES. 654 00:21:53,186 --> 00:21:55,063 CLONES. 655 00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:55,731 Hank: DEAN... 656 00:21:55,814 --> 00:21:58,317 THAT IS AWESOME. 657 00:21:58,400 --> 00:21:59,735 Dean: YOU'RE -- YOU'RE NOT UPSET? 658 00:21:59,818 --> 00:22:01,069 Hank: ABOUT WHAT?! 659 00:22:01,153 --> 00:22:03,697 THAT I'M, LIKE, SOME KIND OF SUPER-COOL, PROBABLY MAGIC, 660 00:22:03,780 --> 00:22:05,323 HIGHLANDER CYBORG CLONE?! 661 00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:06,575 UH, NO. 662 00:22:06,658 --> 00:22:12,164 HEY, JUST ONE MORE REASON IT'S GREAT TO BE A VENTURE. 663 00:22:12,247 --> 00:22:13,749 GOODBYE, OLD FRIEND. 664 00:22:13,832 --> 00:22:17,961 HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY IN YOUR NEW RESTING PLACE. 665 00:22:18,045 --> 00:22:19,796 OKAY, WHO'S THE YOUNGEST? 666 00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:21,339 Dr. Venture: DON'T LOOK AT ME. 667 00:22:21,423 --> 00:22:22,591 DEAN, SON! 668 00:22:22,674 --> 00:22:24,051 WE NEED YOU OVER HERE. 669 00:22:24,134 --> 00:22:29,556 Hank: OH, YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THIS.