1
00:00:01,920 --> 00:00:07,880
'I'm heading east for the Wash on
the Fossdyke and Witham
Navigations.'

2
00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:13,360
'After weeks of chugging along
inland waters,
I can't wait for the sea!'

3
00:00:13,400 --> 00:00:16,680
'Right now, I'm feeling a bit flat.'

4
00:00:16,720 --> 00:00:21,160
'The canal has become a rut,
and I'm stuck in it.'

5
00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:26,160
'It's so completely pancake here
that a molehill is a landmark...

6
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:30,440
..and a trip through a lock
a white-knuckle ride.'

7
00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:37,120
'At three miles an hour,
umbilically attached to the wheel,
I need distraction.'

8
00:00:37,160 --> 00:00:42,640
'Something to eat would be good,
someone to eat with, even better.'

9
00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:21,440
All right if I pull in here? Yes.

10
00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:29,880
I don't want to smash your jetty.

11
00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:40,480
Good landing!

12
00:01:42,480 --> 00:01:50,920
There's a syndrome in the Fens that
leads to depression. It's so flat
and there's not a lot to look at.

13
00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:54,400
So everyone looks miserable?
You look miserable.

14
00:01:54,440 --> 00:01:58,760
I've lived here a long time.
I've had plenty of practice.

15
00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:01,400
Presumably you know the cure?

16
00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:05,400
Distractions, exercise...
Hard work. Hard work?

17
00:02:05,440 --> 00:02:09,400
Hard work, as well, yeah.

18
00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:10,880
That's why you're so smiley.

19
00:02:10,920 --> 00:02:13,360
Let's work.

20
00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:14,840
You're putting me to work?!

21
00:02:14,880 --> 00:02:16,840
Yeah, cheer you up.

22
00:02:16,880 --> 00:02:21,040
'Willow coppices were once
harvested for striplings...

23
00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:26,240
..to make everything from eel traps
to wattle-and-daub Fenland houses.'

24
00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:30,240
What is it about willow?
Is it a special wood?

25
00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:32,720
It takes root very easily.

26
00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:37,720
All you need to start a plant is
a piece of stick about that long -

27
00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:40,280
..nine inches or so long.

28
00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:45,400
And each stick
will grow into a willow tree?

29
00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:49,040
Yes, it will, usually.
They don't all take.

30
00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:51,680
There you go - hold those.

31
00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:54,160
So I'm holding a miniature coppice?

32
00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:55,640
Yeah.

33
00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:58,160
Can I make my own baby coppice?

34
00:02:58,200 --> 00:02:59,640
Absolutely.

35
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:05,120
'Dave, Richard and Chalky spend
spare weekends restoring this willow
bed -

36
00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:12,000
..a labour of love to create a treat
for eyes tired of the Fenland
flats.'

37
00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:16,640
So that's a baby willow tree?
Nothing to do with birds and bees?

38
00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:20,480
No, it's as easy as that.

39
00:03:20,520 --> 00:03:25,760
'But willow coppicing isn't just
about waiting for sticks to grow.'

40
00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:31,400
'There's the hard graft of dredging
and clearing drainage channels...

41
00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:35,920
..that have clogged up
over 100 unmanaged years.'

42
00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:43,440
'My arrival gave the new managers
a chance to get to grips
with the art of delegation.'

43
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:50,320
'And I was put in charge
of the coppice canteen.'

44
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:54,320
I've never seen
such an abundant crop of nettles.

45
00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:57,400
These are absolutely in their prime.

46
00:03:57,440 --> 00:04:04,120
The sprouting tops are full of iron,
natural histamines and formic acid.

47
00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:06,920
They energise the whole system.

48
00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:13,400
Had Popeye known about nettles,
he wouldn't have wasted money
on tinned spinach.

49
00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:18,480
If the Fenlanders knew about them,
they might not be so depressed!

50
00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:25,760
'Wild chives, a chopped onion
and a small potato
are a good basis for any soup.'

51
00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:31,520
Normally, I'd make nettle soup with
a lovely home-made chicken stock.

52
00:04:31,560 --> 00:04:37,480
But with limited resources, I've had
to make stock with the carcasses...

53
00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:39,600
..of my smoked zander.

54
00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:44,040
Anyway, what could be grander
than stock made with zander?

55
00:04:44,080 --> 00:04:48,520
We just pile in
a couple of fields of nettles...

56
00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:52,000
..so they're bulging out of the top.

57
00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:54,040
Pack 'em down.

58
00:04:57,040 --> 00:05:03,080
Squish the rest in with the lid...
and come back in about 20 minutes.

59
00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:34,080
Soup's up! Come and get it!

60
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:37,520
Well, move!

61
00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:48,960
Thank you.
I feel like Mother Teresa.

62
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:53,440
Look like her, too.
Must be the long hair.

63
00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:57,440
Welcome to the soup kitchen!
You'll be needing a spoon.

64
00:05:57,480 --> 00:05:59,640
Looks wonderful.

65
00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:03,280
Have you worked hard for this,
Chalky?

66
00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:06,760
Indeed.
Hope it's worth waiting for.

67
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:08,560
That's for you to decide.

68
00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:10,800
Indeed. Thank you.

69
00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:19,120
So nobody's been stung yet?

70
00:06:19,160 --> 00:06:23,240
Nice flavour.
It's got a kick to it. Very nice.

71
00:06:23,280 --> 00:06:27,240
Yeah?
Yes, indeed. Energising?

72
00:06:27,280 --> 00:06:30,040
Mmm. Does it lift the depression?

73
00:06:30,080 --> 00:06:32,160
'You tell me.'

74
00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:37,920
'The combination of willow energy,
nettles and Dave's penny whistle...

75
00:06:37,960 --> 00:06:41,920
..built mountains of joy
among the Fenland flats.'

76
00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:46,560
'My spirits are high again...
and Chalky's are even higher!'

77
00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:54,080
'Dawn brings me to Boston
and the last mechanical barrier...

78
00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:56,720
..between fresh and salt water.'

79
00:06:56,760 --> 00:07:01,200
'The Bain Marie is about to lose
her saline virginity.'

80
00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:06,760
'She's pretty excited about that.
I'm excited about the saline
larder.'

81
00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:12,480
'Salivating for seafood and hoping
to find something a bit
different...

82
00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:15,120
..I head straight for the beach.'

83
00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:18,160
CLOCK STRIKES HOUR

84
00:07:36,680 --> 00:07:41,880
Anyone who's been beachcombing will
probably have found one of these.

85
00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:45,640
It's called a razor clam
for obvious reasons.

86
00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:49,280
Not many people have seen them
alive.

87
00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:54,760
'They live by the very low tidemark,
a few inches under the sand.'

88
00:07:54,800 --> 00:08:01,080
'Hardly anyone,
except a few industrious sea birds,
bothers to dig them up.'

89
00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:04,640
'One exception
is bait digger Tim Venner.'

90
00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:12,440
'He has invented an ingenious method
of inducing razor clams from their
burrows with a garden spray can.'

91
00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:18,600
You look quite odd from further
down the beach -
weedkilling at low tide!

92
00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:22,320
It seems like an act
of supreme optimism...

93
00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:27,800
..to be strolling down the beach
squirting holes full of salty water.

94
00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:29,280
What's going to happen?

95
00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:32,120
Hopefully, they'll pop out.

96
00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:38,480
'Too much salt
is an irritant for razor clams.'

97
00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:40,480
Will they dive back down?

98
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:43,640
If you leave them long enough.

99
00:08:43,680 --> 00:08:49,640
That must be 30 holes we've filled
in. Shall we see what's popped up?

100
00:08:49,680 --> 00:08:52,320
See if any have come, yeah.

101
00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:56,480
It's a double!
Yeah, you've got two.

102
00:08:56,520 --> 00:08:59,480
Amazing! Wow!

103
00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:01,520
That fleshy white bit...

104
00:09:01,560 --> 00:09:05,600
That's what you eat,
the bit poking out.

105
00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:08,920
That looks like good meat.
Yeah, right through.

106
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,680
Tasty stuff.
There's another.

107
00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:20,120
Got him by the foot. I have a
feeling this is the kind of
shellfish...

108
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:22,880
..that the Japanese would eat raw.

109
00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:27,520
And with that in mind -
always prepared -

110
00:09:27,560 --> 00:09:29,160
..I brought some soy sauce.

111
00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:30,840
Mad!

112
00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:34,000
A little dressing...

113
00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:35,800
Perhaps you'd like to sample it?

114
00:09:35,840 --> 00:09:39,960
Nah, I like mine cooked with butter.

115
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,560
I'll certainly tempt myself.

116
00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:46,320
I hope that was nice!

117
00:09:46,360 --> 00:09:51,000
I promise you, Tim...
Mmm, it was very sweet.

118
00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:55,480
That rates among the finest raw fish
I've ever had.

119
00:09:55,520 --> 00:09:57,680
You're missing out there, I tell
you.

120
00:09:57,720 --> 00:09:59,960
Nah!

121
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:03,960
'We harvested as long as
the racing tide permitted.'

122
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:10,320
'I promised to serve Tim
a more extravagant preparation
of razor clams.'

123
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:13,040
'I needed some classy vegetables.'

124
00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:18,680
It's at times like these that you
feel nature is really on your side.

125
00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:25,120
There's greenery
all around the coastal path,
so many things I could eat.

126
00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:30,600
One of the things I'm excited about
is this - sea beet or sea spinach.

127
00:10:30,640 --> 00:10:35,080
It's easy to see that it's a member
of the spinach family.

128
00:10:35,120 --> 00:10:40,880
It's considered the genetic ancestor
of almost all cultivated spinach -

129
00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:44,520
..the mother of all spinach,
if you like!

130
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:47,280
As if that's not enough...

131
00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:53,000
..one shelf further down my private
greengrocer is another amazing veg.

132
00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:55,800
These are alexanders.

133
00:10:55,840 --> 00:10:58,880
They're named after a Greek hero...

134
00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:04,480
..but the Romans brought them here
to feed their horses and themselves.

135
00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:09,680
It's the stems we're looking for.
You can peel them like rhubarb.

136
00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:14,720
They have a succulent stem that
makes a delicious green vegetable.

137
00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:22,120
My larder's getting so full
I can hardly wait to get cooking!

138
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:26,600
'For a comforting side dish
of creamed sea spinach...

139
00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:30,200
..steam a handful of leaves
for a few minutes.'

140
00:11:30,240 --> 00:11:34,320
'Then whip up
a creamy white sauce...

141
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:38,840
..chop up the drained spinach
and stir it in.'

142
00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:44,360
The alexanders
are cooked with the razor clams.

143
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:48,560
They're started first,
as they need a little longer.

144
00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:54,560
We may have a grain or two of sand,
but that's beach cooking for you.

145
00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:57,560
This is all so quick and easy -

146
00:11:57,600 --> 00:12:02,920
..from the beach to your belly
in a matter of minutes.

147
00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:06,560
In this case, I think,
about two minutes.

148
00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:19,480
'I assembled my dish to tempt Tim,
who, since the sushi episode...

149
00:12:19,520 --> 00:12:24,280
..was still a bit sceptical
of my culinary motives.'

150
00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:30,960
I've come to make amends
for my sushi surprise.

151
00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:36,040
You said you liked it
with garlic and butter.

152
00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:39,840
I trust a bit of wine and cream
won't hurt, as well.

153
00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:42,880
No, it'll be nice. Cheers.

154
00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:50,720
Apart from a bit of milk, flour and
butter, everything was picked wild.

155
00:12:50,760 --> 00:12:55,040
It's all for free, all within about
half a mile of here.

156
00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:58,240
What do you think?
Yeah, I like it.

157
00:12:58,280 --> 00:13:00,240
You're forgiven for the soy sauce.

158
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,760
Really? Yeah.

159
00:13:04,040 --> 00:13:07,000
I could grow quite attached to
these,

160
00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:09,480
if there was less sand in
them.

161
00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:11,000
Have you finished already?

162
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,480
Yeah.

163
00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:15,000
If I was your mother,
I'd say "Eat your greens."

164
00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:17,840
And I'd say "Sod off!"

165
00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:32,840
'After the interminable Fens,
the hills of southern Yorkshire
are an inspiration.'

166
00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:35,840
'The canal is a place of joy again.'

167
00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:38,360
JAUNTY ACCORDION TUNE PLAYS

168
00:13:49,560 --> 00:13:52,600
'Hills mean locks.'

169
00:13:52,640 --> 00:14:00,480
'Though no contender for eighth
wonder of the world, a canal lock
is an ingenious bit of engineering.'

170
00:14:00,520 --> 00:14:04,000
'It deserves a little celebration.'

171
00:14:04,040 --> 00:14:09,080
'In journey time, a lock
is reckoned as good as a mile.'

172
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:16,960
'But if they slow down progress,
they do concentrate the mind
and quicken the pulse a little.'

173
00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:29,280
'The last thing on my mind at this
time of year ought to be mushrooms.'

174
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:34,920
'The main harvest of forest fungi
doesn't start for four more months.'

175
00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:40,840
'But one highly prized mushroom,
like many good things, appears in
spring.'

176
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:48,120
'I'm meeting mycophile Peter Jordan,
who has his mushroom hat on
even in the spring sunshine!'

177
00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:49,600
Hi, Hugh. How are you?

178
00:14:49,640 --> 00:14:51,600
I'm very well.

179
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:56,920
You look exceedingly ready for
a mushroom safari, or for anything!

180
00:14:56,960 --> 00:15:00,520
I'm quietly optimistic
of finding something.

181
00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:02,520
Do your mushroom eyes get rusty?

182
00:15:02,560 --> 00:15:08,520
They do during winter. We haven't
done anything since November.

183
00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:13,920
You're terribly excited about
finding something and, suddenly...

184
00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:16,560
..you'll spot something.

185
00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:21,200
Stop there.
Can you see anything on the ground?

186
00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:23,440
Erm... leaves...

187
00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:25,440
What about that?!

188
00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:30,680
'Peter had spotted his first morel
of the season.'

189
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:35,600
My last morel came in a packet.
It was that big and dark brown.

190
00:15:35,640 --> 00:15:39,480
It sort of twangs
like a rubber sponge.

191
00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:42,240
How do we find some more?

192
00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:45,880
The spore is carried
by the prevailing wind.

193
00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:47,880
In this wood, that's this direction.

194
00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,240
We should head over there.

195
00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:51,960
That's the theory.

196
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:55,960
'Once he finds one morel,
Peter gets scientific...

197
00:15:56,000 --> 00:16:01,280
..using hat and stick to mark the
spot, and following the wind line.'

198
00:16:01,320 --> 00:16:04,480
Check on the stick.
That's your marker.

199
00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:07,280
You follow it from one to the next.

200
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:11,920
'Morels are rare
and well camouflaged.'

201
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:15,480
'Even experienced mushroomers
despair.'

202
00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:20,080
'But Peter's technique was
paying off. He was getting excited.'

203
00:16:20,120 --> 00:16:21,600
I'm impressed by your wind line.

204
00:16:21,640 --> 00:16:25,240
It's not failed... Ah, oh, ah, ah!

205
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:28,480
Can you see it? And another!

206
00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:30,480
You've got a blood lust for them.

207
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:31,960
I really have.

208
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:34,880
Salivating as you slide the knife
in.

209
00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:37,680
There's one!
Well done!

210
00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:42,200
'Soon we had enough to justify
firing up the gastrobike.'

211
00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:46,720
We could've done some sophisticated,

212
00:16:46,760 --> 00:16:49,800
Michelin-style cooking with
these...

213
00:16:49,840 --> 00:16:55,720
..but I thought we'd be decadent
and just fry the lot up in butter...

214
00:16:55,760 --> 00:16:57,760
..in the middle of the woods.

215
00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:00,720
Wonderful -
not masked by other flavours.

216
00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:04,800
Are they as good as
they're cracked up to be?

217
00:17:04,840 --> 00:17:08,320
Do they taste
like a brain on a stalk?

218
00:17:12,360 --> 00:17:14,320
BOTH: Mmm.

219
00:17:14,360 --> 00:17:16,680
Absolutely wonderful.

220
00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:18,840
They are good, Peter.

221
00:17:18,880 --> 00:17:24,480
It's worth all that work -
sticks, knives, tramping.

222
00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:32,480
It's a lot, Hugh,
but I think they're wonderful.

223
00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:37,520
I'm not sure where the flavour is.
I think they're a bit elusive.

224
00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:53,040
They're rated because they're
rare...

225
00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:57,240
..but what is rare is not always
worth paying a lot for.

226
00:17:57,280 --> 00:18:01,640
In fact, they're not bad mushrooms,
and they dry well...

227
00:18:01,680 --> 00:18:04,280
..which improves the flavour.

228
00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:10,280
All kinds of strange creatures
have been crawling out of the holes.

229
00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:14,240
It reminds me of a favourite
and inspiring book -

230
00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:18,400
.."Why Not Eat Insects?"

231
00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:21,080
Well, why not indeed?

232
00:18:21,120 --> 00:18:29,440
'I wanted to recruit some fellow
creepy-crawly enthusiasts. I knew
the adult population would refuse.'

233
00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:34,920
'My neighbours included a young trio
who might not yet have succumbed...

234
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:38,720
..to social prejudice
against insects as food.'

235
00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:42,720
Bugs, grubs -
fat, juicy things with lots of legs.

236
00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:46,720
If it looks tasty, or even if not,
put it in your jar.

237
00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:52,040
You two go that way. Fill your jars.
Imran and I will go over here.

238
00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:55,120
If in doubt, stick it in
your jar!

239
00:18:56,520 --> 00:19:00,840
Let's have a look under here.
Woodlice! Pick 'em up.

240
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,000
Why have you got fat gloves on?

241
00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:08,960
I don't like touching them
with my bare hands. In there!

242
00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:13,160
Put your jar down there.
Oop! In it goes!

243
00:19:13,200 --> 00:19:17,880
Oh, he's not in, is he?
Yes, he is. Yeah!

244
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:24,120
Nice juicy slug!

245
00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:40,640
'The good book suggested woodlice
would be the best bet.'

246
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,120
'They are plentiful...

247
00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:47,960
..and have been compared
to the edible marine crustaceans...

248
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:50,480
..to which they are related.'

249
00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:55,720
I hoped they'd turn pink
to help the analogy.

250
00:19:55,760 --> 00:19:58,760
They're still grey, but never mind.

251
00:20:05,840 --> 00:20:08,000
They smell fishy.

252
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:13,880
Before I inflict them on my precious
ingredients, I'll taste a couple.

253
00:20:19,040 --> 00:20:21,480
That is so weird.

254
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:26,480
They are very close to their
crustacean cousins, the shrimps.

255
00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:31,200
Quite sweet...with a sort of dusky,
slightly earthy note.

256
00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:32,840
Woody.

257
00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:37,000
'I decided to make forest fritters.'

258
00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:43,880
'Into a basic mixture
of puree'd lentils, egg and flour,
I stirred a pan of morels...

259
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:46,720
..and my briefly blanched woodlice.'

260
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:04,080
Well, it's just about frying time.

261
00:21:04,120 --> 00:21:07,880
At this point,
I could use a little assistance.

262
00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:10,440
Come on, you lot!

263
00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:14,920
I'm afraid you missed the gory
bit. They're already dead.

264
00:21:14,960 --> 00:21:16,080
Lovely.

265
00:21:16,120 --> 00:21:18,880
This is what we've made with them.

266
00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:21,320
Who wants to be cook?

267
00:21:21,360 --> 00:21:25,280
Take the bowl.
I want you to drop blobs...

268
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:30,280
..into my fat - little cakes,
we want to make little patties.

269
00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:33,760
Mmm. It should drop off.
I'll give you a hand.

270
00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:37,240
I'll never think of woodlice again!

271
00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:39,240
A few more.

272
00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:42,000
I'll never kill woodlices
as long as I live.

273
00:21:42,040 --> 00:21:44,760
Pangs of guilt, eh, Imran?

274
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:48,480
You were very bloodthirsty
in the forest.

275
00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:53,560
Ugh, you're touching it! Touching
it? You'll be eating it in a minute.

276
00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:58,560
They should be nice and crispy.
Stand back while I turn them over.

277
00:21:58,600 --> 00:22:01,760
What a colour!
Doesn't it look good?

278
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:07,760
'Together we cooked up a good batch,
but they might not be to all
tastes.'

279
00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:12,360
'So, as an extra contribution
to the family picnic...

280
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:17,960
..I rustled up a vegetarian option -
a tart of morels and wild garlic.'

281
00:22:27,360 --> 00:22:28,960
Hi!

282
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:32,000
Hi. I hope everybody's very hungry.

283
00:22:33,240 --> 00:22:34,360
They're gonna have to be.

284
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:36,840
That looks delicious.

285
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:41,760
Before you try that, try what
your children have been cooking.

286
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:43,720
No, I don't want to!

287
00:22:43,760 --> 00:22:46,200
Do you know what that is?

288
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:50,000
Woodlouse, woodlouse!
I don't want to!

289
00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:52,000
Don't you think Mum should eat it?

290
00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:55,440
No, thank you! Please!

291
00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:57,080
SHE SQUEALS

292
00:22:57,120 --> 00:23:01,160
Come on, someone's got to taste
your kids' cooking.

293
00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:03,840
SHE GROANS
Just a little one.

294
00:23:03,880 --> 00:23:06,520
I can't stand this!

295
00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:20,440
David, what do you think?
You cooked 'em.

296
00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:23,280
You couldn't open a restaurant.

297
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:25,280
Well, actually...

298
00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:27,640
..it's pretty bad!

299
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:29,880
LAUGHTER

300
00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:35,800
'Well, I enjoyed them...almost
as much as Bibi's onion bhajis.'

301
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:39,800
'And I scored more of a hit
with the morel tart.'

302
00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:41,800
I take your word for it.

303
00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:44,240
There's a snail.

304
00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:54,480
Is that all right?

305
00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:57,520
Now you'll tell her what's inside.

306
00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:00,960
Just mushrooms and slugs.

307
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:02,440
Ugh!

308
00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:04,240
LAUGHTER

309
00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:08,240
No, I promise you,
it's a bona fide...

310
00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:12,360
..morel mushroom
and wild garlic tart.

311
00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:14,880
Subtitles by Red Bee Media