'I'm heading east for the Wash on the Fossdyke and Witham Navigations.'
'After weeks of chugging along inland waters, I can't wait for the sea!'
'Right now, I'm feeling a bit flat.'
'The canal has become a rut, and I'm stuck in it.'
'It's so completely pancake here that a molehill is a landmark...
..and a trip through a lock a white-knuckle ride.'
'At three miles an hour, umbilically attached to the wheel, I need distraction.'
'Something to eat would be good, someone to eat with, even better.'
All right if I pull in here? Yes.
I don't want to smash your jetty.
Good landing!
There's a syndrome in the Fens that leads to depression. It's so flat and there's not a lot to look at.
So everyone looks miserable? You look miserable.
I've lived here a long time. I've had plenty of practice.
Presumably you know the cure?
Distractions, exercise... Hard work. Hard work?
Hard work, as well, yeah.
That's why you're so smiley.
Let's work.
You're putting me to work?!
Yeah, cheer you up.
'Willow coppices were once harvested for striplings...
..to make everything from eel traps to wattle-and-daub Fenland houses.'
What is it about willow? Is it a special wood?
It takes root very easily.
All you need to start a plant is a piece of stick about that long -
..nine inches or so long.
And each stick will grow into a willow tree?
Yes, it will, usually. They don't all take.
There you go - hold those.
So I'm holding a miniature coppice?
Yeah.
Can I make my own baby coppice?
Absolutely.
'Dave, Richard and Chalky spend spare weekends restoring this willow bed -
..a labour of love to create a treat for eyes tired of the Fenland flats.'
So that's a baby willow tree? Nothing to do with birds and bees?
No, it's as easy as that.
'But willow coppicing isn't just about waiting for sticks to grow.'
'There's the hard graft of dredging and clearing drainage channels...
..that have clogged up over 100 unmanaged years.'
'My arrival gave the new managers a chance to get to grips with the art of delegation.'
'And I was put in charge of the coppice canteen.'
I've never seen such an abundant crop of nettles.
These are absolutely in their prime.
The sprouting tops are full of iron, natural histamines and formic acid.
They energise the whole system.
Had Popeye known about nettles, he wouldn't have wasted money on tinned spinach.
If the Fenlanders knew about them, they might not be so depressed!
'Wild chives, a chopped onion and a small potato are a good basis for any soup.'
Normally, I'd make nettle soup with a lovely home-made chicken stock.
But with limited resources, I've had to make stock with the carcasses...
..of my smoked zander.
Anyway, what could be grander than stock made with zander?
We just pile in a couple of fields of nettles...
..so they're bulging out of the top.
Pack 'em down.
Squish the rest in with the lid... and come back in about 20 minutes.
Soup's up! Come and get it!
Well, move!
Thank you. I feel like Mother Teresa.
Look like her, too. Must be the long hair.
Welcome to the soup kitchen! You'll be needing a spoon.
Looks wonderful.
Have you worked hard for this, Chalky?
Indeed. Hope it's worth waiting for.
That's for you to decide.
Indeed. Thank you.
So nobody's been stung yet?
Nice flavour. It's got a kick to it. Very nice.
Yeah? Yes, indeed. Energising?
Mmm. Does it lift the depression?
'You tell me.'
'The combination of willow energy, nettles and Dave's penny whistle...
..built mountains of joy among the Fenland flats.'
'My spirits are high again... and Chalky's are even higher!'
'Dawn brings me to Boston and the last mechanical barrier...
..between fresh and salt water.'
'The Bain Marie is about to lose her saline virginity.'
'She's pretty excited about that. I'm excited about the saline larder.'
'Salivating for seafood and hoping to find something a bit different...
..I head straight for the beach.'
CLOCK STRIKES HOUR
Anyone who's been beachcombing will probably have found one of these.
It's called a razor clam for obvious reasons.
Not many people have seen them alive.
'They live by the very low tidemark, a few inches under the sand.'
'Hardly anyone, except a few industrious sea birds, bothers to dig them up.'
'One exception is bait digger Tim Venner.'
'He has invented an ingenious method of inducing razor clams from their burrows with a garden spray can.'
You look quite odd from further down the beach - weedkilling at low tide!
It seems like an act of supreme optimism...
..to be strolling down the beach squirting holes full of salty water.
What's going to happen?
Hopefully, they'll pop out.
'Too much salt is an irritant for razor clams.'
Will they dive back down?
If you leave them long enough.
That must be 30 holes we've filled in. Shall we see what's popped up?
See if any have come, yeah.
It's a double! Yeah, you've got two.
Amazing! Wow!
That fleshy white bit...
That's what you eat, the bit poking out.
That looks like good meat. Yeah, right through.
Tasty stuff. There's another.
Got him by the foot. I have a feeling this is the kind of shellfish...
..that the Japanese would eat raw.
And with that in mind - always prepared -
..I brought some soy sauce.
Mad!
A little dressing...
Perhaps you'd like to sample it?
Nah, I like mine cooked with butter.
I'll certainly tempt myself.
I hope that was nice!
I promise you, Tim... Mmm, it was very sweet.
That rates among the finest raw fish I've ever had.
You're missing out there, I tell you.
Nah!
'We harvested as long as the racing tide permitted.'
'I promised to serve Tim a more extravagant preparation of razor clams.'
'I needed some classy vegetables.'
It's at times like these that you feel nature is really on your side.
There's greenery all around the coastal path, so many things I could eat.
One of the things I'm excited about is this - sea beet or sea spinach.
It's easy to see that it's a member of the spinach family.
It's considered the genetic ancestor of almost all cultivated spinach -
..the mother of all spinach, if you like!
As if that's not enough...
..one shelf further down my private greengrocer is another amazing veg.
These are alexanders.
They're named after a Greek hero...
..but the Romans brought them here to feed their horses and themselves.
It's the stems we're looking for. You can peel them like rhubarb.
They have a succulent stem that makes a delicious green vegetable.
My larder's getting so full I can hardly wait to get cooking!
'For a comforting side dish of creamed sea spinach...
..steam a handful of leaves for a few minutes.'
'Then whip up a creamy white sauce...
..chop up the drained spinach and stir it in.'
The alexanders are cooked with the razor clams.
They're started first, as they need a little longer.
We may have a grain or two of sand, but that's beach cooking for you.
This is all so quick and easy -
..from the beach to your belly in a matter of minutes.
In this case, I think, about two minutes.
'I assembled my dish to tempt Tim, who, since the sushi episode...
..was still a bit sceptical of my culinary motives.'
I've come to make amends for my sushi surprise.
You said you liked it with garlic and butter.
I trust a bit of wine and cream won't hurt, as well.
No, it'll be nice. Cheers.
Apart from a bit of milk, flour and butter, everything was picked wild.
It's all for free, all within about half a mile of here.
What do you think? Yeah, I like it.
You're forgiven for the soy sauce.
Really? Yeah.
I could grow quite attached to these,
if there was less sand in them.
Have you finished already?
Yeah.
If I was your mother, I'd say "Eat your greens."
And I'd say "Sod off!"
'After the interminable Fens, the hills of southern Yorkshire are an inspiration.'
'The canal is a place of joy again.'
JAUNTY ACCORDION TUNE PLAYS
'Hills mean locks.'
'Though no contender for eighth wonder of the world, a canal lock is an ingenious bit of engineering.'
'It deserves a little celebration.'
'In journey time, a lock is reckoned as good as a mile.'
'But if they slow down progress, they do concentrate the mind and quicken the pulse a little.'
'The last thing on my mind at this time of year ought to be mushrooms.'
'The main harvest of forest fungi doesn't start for four more months.'
'But one highly prized mushroom, like many good things, appears in spring.'
'I'm meeting mycophile Peter Jordan, who has his mushroom hat on even in the spring sunshine!'
Hi, Hugh. How are you?
I'm very well.
You look exceedingly ready for a mushroom safari, or for anything!
I'm quietly optimistic of finding something.
Do your mushroom eyes get rusty?
They do during winter. We haven't done anything since November.
You're terribly excited about finding something and, suddenly...
..you'll spot something.
Stop there. Can you see anything on the ground?
Erm... leaves...
What about that?!
'Peter had spotted his first morel of the season.'
My last morel came in a packet. It was that big and dark brown.
It sort of twangs like a rubber sponge.
How do we find some more?
The spore is carried by the prevailing wind.
In this wood, that's this direction.
We should head over there.
That's the theory.
'Once he finds one morel, Peter gets scientific...
..using hat and stick to mark the spot, and following the wind line.'
Check on the stick. That's your marker.
You follow it from one to the next.
'Morels are rare and well camouflaged.'
'Even experienced mushroomers despair.'
'But Peter's technique was paying off. He was getting excited.'
I'm impressed by your wind line.
It's not failed... Ah, oh, ah, ah!
Can you see it? And another!
You've got a blood lust for them.
I really have.
Salivating as you slide the knife in.
There's one! Well done!
'Soon we had enough to justify firing up the gastrobike.'
We could've done some sophisticated,
Michelin-style cooking with these...
..but I thought we'd be decadent and just fry the lot up in butter...
..in the middle of the woods.
Wonderful - not masked by other flavours.
Are they as good as they're cracked up to be?
Do they taste like a brain on a stalk?
BOTH: Mmm.
Absolutely wonderful.
They are good, Peter.
It's worth all that work - sticks, knives, tramping.
It's a lot, Hugh, but I think they're wonderful.
I'm not sure where the flavour is. I think they're a bit elusive.
They're rated because they're rare...
..but what is rare is not always worth paying a lot for.
In fact, they're not bad mushrooms, and they dry well...
..which improves the flavour.
All kinds of strange creatures have been crawling out of the holes.
It reminds me of a favourite and inspiring book -
.."Why Not Eat Insects?"
Well, why not indeed?
'I wanted to recruit some fellow creepy-crawly enthusiasts. I knew the adult population would refuse.'
'My neighbours included a young trio who might not yet have succumbed...
..to social prejudice against insects as food.'
Bugs, grubs - fat, juicy things with lots of legs.
If it looks tasty, or even if not, put it in your jar.
You two go that way. Fill your jars. Imran and I will go over here.
If in doubt, stick it in your jar!
Let's have a look under here. Woodlice! Pick 'em up.
Why have you got fat gloves on?
I don't like touching them with my bare hands. In there!
Put your jar down there. Oop! In it goes!
Oh, he's not in, is he? Yes, he is. Yeah!
Nice juicy slug!
'The good book suggested woodlice would be the best bet.'
'They are plentiful...
..and have been compared to the edible marine crustaceans...
..to which they are related.'
I hoped they'd turn pink to help the analogy.
They're still grey, but never mind.
They smell fishy.
Before I inflict them on my precious ingredients, I'll taste a couple.
That is so weird.
They are very close to their crustacean cousins, the shrimps.
Quite sweet...with a sort of dusky, slightly earthy note.
Woody.
'I decided to make forest fritters.'
'Into a basic mixture of puree'd lentils, egg and flour, I stirred a pan of morels...
..and my briefly blanched woodlice.'
Well, it's just about frying time.
At this point, I could use a little assistance.
Come on, you lot!
I'm afraid you missed the gory bit. They're already dead.
Lovely.
This is what we've made with them.
Who wants to be cook?
Take the bowl. I want you to drop blobs...
..into my fat - little cakes, we want to make little patties.
Mmm. It should drop off. I'll give you a hand.
I'll never think of woodlice again!
A few more.
I'll never kill woodlices as long as I live.
Pangs of guilt, eh, Imran?
You were very bloodthirsty in the forest.
Ugh, you're touching it! Touching it? You'll be eating it in a minute.
They should be nice and crispy. Stand back while I turn them over.
What a colour! Doesn't it look good?
'Together we cooked up a good batch, but they might not be to all tastes.'
'So, as an extra contribution to the family picnic...
..I rustled up a vegetarian option - a tart of morels and wild garlic.'
Hi!
Hi. I hope everybody's very hungry.
They're gonna have to be.
That looks delicious.
Before you try that, try what your children have been cooking.
No, I don't want to!
Do you know what that is?
Woodlouse, woodlouse! I don't want to!
Don't you think Mum should eat it?
No, thank you! Please!
SHE SQUEALS
Come on, someone's got to taste your kids' cooking.
SHE GROANS Just a little one.
I can't stand this!
David, what do you think? You cooked 'em.
You couldn't open a restaurant.
Well, actually...
..it's pretty bad!
LAUGHTER
'Well, I enjoyed them...almost as much as Bibi's onion bhajis.'
'And I scored more of a hit with the morel tart.'
I take your word for it.
There's a snail.
Is that all right?
Now you'll tell her what's inside.
Just mushrooms and slugs.
Ugh!
LAUGHTER
No, I promise you, it's a bona fide...
..morel mushroom and wild garlic tart.
Subtitles by Red Bee Media