(Seagulls)
Look, Roger. Corfu.
(Horn)
(Horse neighs)
(Speaking Greek)
- Oh, stop coughing, Gerry, son. - I have catarrh, actually, Larry.
No longer. Nobody contracts or keeps catarrh on Corfu. Not even you.
- Catarrh is Bournemouth. - Roger.
You really are the sorriest looking specimen I've ever seen.
- (Boat horn hoots) - Oh, no, no. You are, Leslie.
Oh, no. No, you are, Margo.
You'll all be clapped into quarantine and sent back to Bournemouth and I wouldn't blame them.
Come on.
(Roger barks)
- Thank you. Thank you very much. - Mind…
Gerry with his catarrh, Margo with her drippy nose.
Oh, Mother, take those winter wrappings off. We're here for our health.
Don't keep on, dear. I'm sure we'll all feel much better very soon.
There's no need to rush into health.
(Shouting)
(Greek accent) What you got, Christaki?
You got some Englis?
(Speaks Greek)
It's for spots.
Bots.
Bang, bang.
Bam, bam?
They're caterpillars. Very soon they're going to be chrysalids.
How long do you stay here at Corfu, madame?
Oh, for ever.
Well, un, un, at least until Larry, erm,
my eldest son, he's a writer…
Well, until he decides that we move again.
- English? - Bournemouth.
Bonmouth.
Well, we've sold the house.
House.
(Roger barks)
Roger, Roger, come here.
Oh, Leslie, shoot that damn dog.
(Shouting)
A-ya. Hey.
(Laughs) You should get someone who speaks Englis.
I am Spiro Agiapoulos.
(Kiss)
(Horn)
They alls here calls me Spiro Americano.
I haves beens to Chicago.
Which is a spot in America.
For eight years in this place.
I makes moneys.
You want bathrooms?
Oh, yes. Yes, indeed.
- All Englis always want bathrooms. - (Sneezes)
Every time I drives Englis, they ask for bathrooms.
You gots the sneezes?
Oh, I'm afraid we've all been suffering rather from the weather.
Leslie's developed dreadful ear trouble. Something to do with bangs. He shoots.
- And Margo, Margo's covered in spots. - Mother.
- Gerry's been all right, haven't you, dear? - Yes.
Bit sniffly, but then he never minds anything as long as he can put it in a jam jar.
Oh-ho.
We stops.
- (Man chants in Greek) - We must be respectfuls.
Excuse me, Mrs Durrells.
Moment.
Very sorrowfuls.
(Chanting continues)
- (Leslie) What on earth's going on? - Must be an epidemic.
There's so many of them. It's unnatural.
- People do it all the time, don't they? - What?
- Die. - Not in bunches, they don't.
Perhaps they save them up until they've got enough to make it worthwhile.
- What is this? Out. - (Yelps)
Out. Who are you?
- Out. Out. - (Barking)
Off. Shoo.
- Shoo. - (Barking continues)
OK. We go.
(Engine starts)
(Horn)
(Spiro) Oh, the dogs. Get away, you mangy pack.
Get away. Go on.
There you ares.
There is the villa with the bathrooms.
Come on.
- Do we think yes? - Oh, we do think yes.
- Yes. - Oh, yes.
(Cicadas chirrup)
Come on, Roger.
Gerry?
- I'm here. - Have you had enough breakfast?
- Honey and things? - Yes, thank you.
We're going to get the baggage out of customs.
- Don't touch that. - It's my duty, Spiro.
Don't give me duties. I know your duties.
You, Christaki, were fined 12,000 drachma for dynamitings fis.
You is the criminal, not these innocent foreigners.
- You tell them, Spiro. - Yes. I tell him. Yes.
Out. Out. Out.
Ha, ha. Well done, Spiro.
- (Spiro) I tell him. - You told him.
(Donkey braying)
Oh.
(Gunshot)
- (Donkey brays) - Put it back on the wall, Gerry.
(Muttering)
Please tell your friends not to tether their donkeys outside my window, Margo.
(Gunshot)
- They're not my friends. - (Men muttering)
I think your sunbathing might be a little unwise, Margo.
Why?
It's attracting young men and their donkeys from all over the island.
- Really? - I can't see why.
Well, your costume doesn't cover an awful lot.
Oh, Mother, you're frightfully old-fashioned.
I mean, after all, you only die once.
(Whimpering)
Roger found some wild bees.
Do you have to shoot your gun so near the house, Leslie?
Er, yes.
It's all your fault.
Mine?
- They're all selfish, your children. - He tried smelling them.
You brought them up to be selfish.
l like that! l never did anything of the sort.
We wouldn't be so selfish without guidance.
They stung him and I don't blame them.
- (Donkey brays) - God, I won't be able to write a thing.
(Gerry) Crab spiders change colour.
Did you know that, Mother?
(Mrs Durrell) What, dea… No. No. No, I didn't.
Not all at once but if you come back a day later,
you can see it all happening.
(Buzzing)
(Chirping)
(Gramophone) ♪ When the deep purple falls
♪ Over sleepy garden walls ♪
♪ And the stars begin to flicker
♪ In the sky
♪ Through the mist of a memory
♪ You wander back to me
♪ Breathing my name with a sigh
(Muffled) ♪ In the still
♪ Of the night
♪ Once again I hold you tight ♪
(Rattling)
♪ Though you're gone, your love lives on
♪ When moonlight beams
♪ And as long as my heart will beat
♪ Lover, we'll always meet ♪
(Dog barks)
Spiders.
I intend to work all day.
I think Gerry should do something useful.
I think he should.
What do you do?
Most things. He needs to be educated.
Well, he can read.
I'll teach him to shoot and sail and then he can face the world.
Only if he joins the merchant navy, dear.
He should be taught to dance.
Do you know, there is not one person on this island can tango.
Literature. The rest will follow.
I've given him a few books.
Rabelais, Lady Chatterley.
Don't you think that Rabelais is a little old for him, dear?
If he gets sex in the right perspective now, the rest'll follow.
You always drag sex into it, Larry. No matter what.
We could talk about eggs, toast and you drag sex in.
Really, Margo.
Where is Gerry?
Look, Roger. The swallows are back.
- (Tweeting) - They're repairing their nest.
Hey. You boys, you ought to be more careful up ladders.
- I'm all right. - You don't want to worry your poor mothers.
(Larry) Why not? (Spiro) Why nots?
Why nots?
Well, she's never done anything for us. Why should we start to consider her?
Oh, no, no, no, no. You must not joke about such things, Master Lorrys.
- Well, he's quite right, Spiro. - No, no. Gollies, no.
Yes. She isn't really much good as a mother, you know.
(Larry) All that woman ever thinks about is cooking.
- (Spiro) Don't say that. - They won't do anything to their nest
- with you lot shouting and arguing. - We'll shoot them.
(Laughs) Shoots thems.
The lacewing fly lay eggs, all on stilts. Then she goes off and leaves them.
- Just like Mother. - (Spiro) No, no, no, no, no.
Come, come, come, boys.
Honest to Gods. If I had a mother like yours,
I'd go down every mornings and kisses her feets.
Her feets.
What is Greek for eggs, Spiro?
You don't need to know that, Master Gerrys. You don't need to speak Greeks
when I speak such perfect Englis.
(Cock crows)
Egg. What is the Greek for egg, Agathi?
Ellinika, Agathi?
(Speaks Greek)
(Speaking Greek)
Thank you. (Speaks Greek)
(Speaks Greek) Thank you. Thank you.
(Speaks Greek)
I'd better go now, Agathi. (Speaks Greek)
(Speaks Greek)
- (Girl) Gerry. Gerry. - (Gerry speaks Greek)
Gerald, these awful wriggly things, what are they? Caterpillars?
No, they're not, as a matter of fact. They become ladybirds, actually.
I don't want them becoming ladybirds near me.
They don't look like ladybirds.
- Well, they're going to be. - (Mrs Durrell) Oh, I mean, I'm sure.
How about that bee you put in my cigarette box?
Why are you afflicted with this urge to fill things with animals?
It could be very dangerous.
- Do try not to. - I forgot it was there.
- I could have been stung. - I know.
He's got to do something.
- I think it's a healthy interest. - (Gerry) I'm sorry.
I don't want wriggly things everywhere. Suppose I have friends to stay?
- Well, stamp on 'em. That's what I do. - I'm worried about his education.
I'm worried about him turning the house into a menagerie. I intend to have people to stay.
Aren't you worried about his education?
- I can speak lots of Greek now. - (Larry) Yes.
I suppose it won't lead anywhere, this putting animals into things.
I wouldn't mind a bee attack if it led anywhere.
I think he's going through a phase.
He's been going through it since he was two.
I'll think of something. If you want him stuffed with useless information,
- I'll try to find someone. - (Roger whines)
- Come on, Roger. - (Roger barks)
- Where are you going? - Earwigs.
(Roger barks)
Ah. It's a nest.
A nest of an earwig.
See the eggs?
(Cock crows)
It's no good. I've given this villa every chance. It's just not big enough.
- Well, it's big enough for me. - And for me.
Yeah, well, you can't even spell.
(Gramophone) ♪ Whispering so no one near can hear me
♪ Each little whisper seems to cheer me
♪ I know it's true ♪
(Banging)
(Hens clucking)
Oh. I wanted to see.
- See it happen. Didn't you, Roger? - (Roger barks)
Your young mans, they adores you.
But you do not whips them enough, Mrs Durrells.
- Whips them? - Yes, trusses them.
The young Master Gerrys, he's ignorants.
He is, er, talking to the peasants in Greeks.
He must be educates or he will speak only Greeks
and be an ignorants man.
and nobodys in this whole world who speaks Greeks is anybodys.
Become a wilds boy.
(Speaks Greek)
(♪ Singing in Greek)
(Speaks Greek)
(Roger barks)
Good afternoon. You are one of the foreigners inhabit the villa.
- The small English milord. - I am but I'm not a milord.
What you must not do, and this is a fact,
is sleep under the cypress.
- I wasn't sleeping. - (Laughs) Excellent, excellent.
What you must not do is doze off
because black cypresses are dangerous.
You may sit under them but not sleep.
You tempted. The shadow, a good shade, longer, sleep,
but never for any reason.
And here, I give you facts.
Never sleep under a cypress.
You ask why? Because, when you wake,
you are gone to the air like crazy.
Your brains. (Whistles)
Black cypresses have roots
which wriggle into your brains as you sleep, then…
(Whistles) Gone, your brains.
Your head will be empty as a whistle
until breath is blown into it.
ls that true of all trees, all cypresses?
(Laughs) Not all.
Only the black cypress.
Only the black cypress steals your brains.
(Speaks Greek)
(Groans)
(Gerry) Beware the black cypress.
- George. - Larry.
He's just been left to run wild but, don't break his spirit altogether.
Beware the black cypress.
(Mrs Durrell) Do you like crawly things? (Larry) Oh, yes. Do watch out for those.
- Beware the black cypress. - (Mrs Durrell) I hope you can teach him
before he goes completely native.
George is a friend of Larry's.
And he has kindly consented to become your tutor.
Oh, yes, Gerry. It had to come.
Oh.
(Mrs Durrell) How does he do?
How do you do?
How do you do, Gerald?
Will tomorrow morning at nine suit you?
(Mrs Durrell) Have a cup of tea, Gerry. (Larry) Well, don't look so glum.
No, thank you, Mother.
I'll just go and say goodbye to everything.
What does he think we're going to do to him?
That's it, I suppose. Tomorrow at nine.
That's that, I suppose, Roger.