1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:03,568 --> 00:00:06,069 ( theme music playing ) 2 00:00:21,420 --> 00:00:23,153 THINGS HAVE GONE FROM BAD TO WORSE 3 00:00:23,155 --> 00:00:24,355 HERE IN NOUVION. 4 00:00:24,357 --> 00:00:26,324 WE WERE JUST ABOUT TO SEND THE AIRMEN 5 00:00:26,326 --> 00:00:28,292 OUT TO SEA IN TWO WINE BARRELS 6 00:00:28,294 --> 00:00:30,227 WHICH WERE HIDDEN IN MY CELLAR, 7 00:00:30,229 --> 00:00:31,829 WHEN GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN 8 00:00:31,831 --> 00:00:32,996 CONFISCATED THE BARRELS 9 00:00:32,998 --> 00:00:35,032 BECAUSE HE THOUGHT THAT THEY CONTAINED 10 00:00:35,034 --> 00:00:37,134 A RATHER GOOD '26 CLARET. 11 00:00:37,136 --> 00:00:38,836 NEEDLESS TO SAY, THE AIRMEN ARE NOW 12 00:00:38,838 --> 00:00:40,738 IN HIS CELLAR AT THE CHATEAU. 13 00:00:40,740 --> 00:00:43,040 IF HE DECIDES TO SAMPLE THE CLARET, 14 00:00:43,042 --> 00:00:44,775 I AM A DEAD MAN. 15 00:00:44,777 --> 00:00:47,177 SEE, MY HANDS ARE SHAKING. 16 00:00:47,179 --> 00:00:48,679 IN THE ABSENCE OF-- 17 00:00:48,681 --> 00:00:49,714 OF TRANQUILIZERS, 18 00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:54,251 I AM MIXING GIN WITH ACORN COFFEE. 19 00:00:54,253 --> 00:00:56,220 I FIND THAT IT HELPS TO CALM ME DOWN. 20 00:00:56,222 --> 00:00:57,421 Edith: RENE. 21 00:01:01,226 --> 00:01:02,460 LOOK. 22 00:01:02,462 --> 00:01:04,795 THE FIRST EDITION OF THE NEW NOUVION NEWSPAPER 23 00:01:04,797 --> 00:01:06,230 IS ON THE STREETS. 24 00:01:06,232 --> 00:01:08,766 I DO KNOW, EDITH. I AM THE EDITOR. 25 00:01:08,768 --> 00:01:11,268 YOU ARE VERY NAUGHTY, RENE. 26 00:01:11,270 --> 00:01:13,437 YOU DID NOT TELL ME I HAD BEEN CHOSEN 27 00:01:13,439 --> 00:01:15,038 AS THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION. 28 00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:16,374 WELL, AFTER ALL YOUR NAGGING, 29 00:01:16,376 --> 00:01:17,508 WHAT ELSE COULD I DO? 30 00:01:17,510 --> 00:01:19,643 LOOK AT MY PICTURE. 31 00:01:19,645 --> 00:01:21,178 TO THINK OF MY FACE STARING OUT 32 00:01:21,180 --> 00:01:22,813 OF ALL THE NEWSSTANDS. 33 00:01:22,815 --> 00:01:24,047 AND UNDER THE TITLE, 34 00:01:24,049 --> 00:01:26,784 "THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION REPRESENTS STRENGTH, 35 00:01:26,786 --> 00:01:28,719 VIRTUE AND BEAUTY." 36 00:01:28,721 --> 00:01:31,121 YOU MUST REMEMBER, EDITH, 37 00:01:31,123 --> 00:01:33,257 IT IS A PROPAGANDA PAPER. 38 00:01:35,193 --> 00:01:36,694 - RENE. - HMM? 39 00:01:36,696 --> 00:01:39,730 IS THERE NOT SOME WAY I CAN SHOW MY APPRECIATION? 40 00:01:39,732 --> 00:01:41,098 AFTER ALL, 41 00:01:41,100 --> 00:01:42,566 THE CAFE IS EMPTY. 42 00:01:42,568 --> 00:01:44,334 YES, OF COURSE, EDITH. 43 00:01:44,336 --> 00:01:46,871 THE SINK BEHIND THE BAR IS BUNGED UP. 44 00:01:46,873 --> 00:01:49,206 GO AND SEE IF YOU CAN CLEAR IT OUT, WILL YOU? 45 00:01:49,208 --> 00:01:51,308 PSST. 46 00:01:51,310 --> 00:01:53,043 IF I AM PUT UNDER ANY MORE STRAIN 47 00:01:53,045 --> 00:01:54,845 I AM GOING TO BE OUT OF GIN. 48 00:01:56,681 --> 00:01:58,215 LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY, 49 00:01:58,217 --> 00:02:00,284 I SHALL SAY THIS ONLY ONCE. 50 00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:01,452 I HAVE HAD THE PAINTING 51 00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:03,320 OF THE FALLEN MADONNA WITH THE BIG BOOBIES 52 00:02:03,322 --> 00:02:04,688 WE STOLE FROM HERR FLICK'S SAFE 53 00:02:04,690 --> 00:02:05,989 VALUED BY AN EXPERT. 54 00:02:05,991 --> 00:02:07,124 IT IS A FORGERY. 55 00:02:07,126 --> 00:02:08,626 NO. 56 00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:09,794 BUT HOW DO YOU TELL? 57 00:02:13,131 --> 00:02:15,566 HER BOOBIES ARE NOT BIG ENOUGH. 58 00:02:18,002 --> 00:02:19,837 THEY LOOK ALL RIGHT TO ME. 59 00:02:21,506 --> 00:02:23,741 I ALSO FOUND OUT THAT SOMEHOW, 60 00:02:23,743 --> 00:02:25,576 THE ORIGINAL IS IN THE POSSESSION 61 00:02:25,578 --> 00:02:27,812 OF GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN AT THE CHATEAU. 62 00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:28,946 WE MUST GET IT. 63 00:02:28,948 --> 00:02:31,114 WE NEED THE FUNDS FOR THE RESISTANCE. 64 00:02:31,116 --> 00:02:33,818 I AM MORE CONCERNED ABOUT THE AIRMEN THAN THIS PAINTING. 65 00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:35,185 IF THEY ARE FOUND IN BARRELS 66 00:02:35,187 --> 00:02:37,054 THAT CAME FROM MY CELLAR, WE WILL BE SHOT. 67 00:02:37,056 --> 00:02:38,288 HE IS RIGHT. 68 00:02:38,290 --> 00:02:40,223 THE PAINTING IS OF SECONDARY IMPORTANCE. 69 00:02:40,225 --> 00:02:41,425 I AGREE. 70 00:02:41,427 --> 00:02:43,761 I WILL PUT THE BEST BRAINS OF THE RESISTANCE 71 00:02:43,763 --> 00:02:45,529 ONTO THE PROBLEM OF RESCUING THE AIRMEN. 72 00:02:45,531 --> 00:02:48,732 HOWEVER, THE RESISTANCE IS STILL VERY SHORT OF FUNDS. 73 00:02:50,635 --> 00:02:52,235 ( register rings ) 74 00:02:55,139 --> 00:02:57,174 WHEN THE PAINTING IS RECOVERED AND SOLD, 75 00:02:57,176 --> 00:02:58,709 YOU WILL BE REIMBURSED. 76 00:02:58,711 --> 00:03:00,578 BUT NOW, I MUST VANISH LIKE A PHANTOM 77 00:03:00,580 --> 00:03:02,580 TO THE HAIRDRESSER'S. 78 00:03:05,283 --> 00:03:07,618 OH, RENE, YOU LOOK SO WORRIED. 79 00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:10,020 WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO GET YOU SOME MORE GIN? 80 00:03:10,022 --> 00:03:11,789 BOLS. 81 00:03:15,126 --> 00:03:17,928 I WILL GET YOU SOME ANYWAY. 82 00:03:19,965 --> 00:03:22,299 Colonel: I MUST SAY, GRUBER, 83 00:03:22,301 --> 00:03:25,836 THIS FIRST EDITION IS NOT AT ALL BAD. 84 00:03:25,838 --> 00:03:27,404 CONGRATULATIONS. 85 00:03:27,406 --> 00:03:31,074 I SUPERVISED RENE TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY, 86 00:03:31,076 --> 00:03:33,043 MAKING SURE HE ONLY PUT IN THE PAPER 87 00:03:33,045 --> 00:03:34,145 WHAT I TOLD HIM. 88 00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:35,912 WHY YOU HAVE SO MANY ARTICLES 89 00:03:35,914 --> 00:03:39,283 ABOUT GENERAL VON KINKYHOFFEN? 90 00:03:40,285 --> 00:03:42,853 BECAUSE HE IS THE GARRISON COMMANDER. 91 00:03:42,855 --> 00:03:45,389 AND HE HAS A BIG HEAD. 92 00:03:45,391 --> 00:03:46,490 LOOK. 93 00:03:46,492 --> 00:03:48,192 HE INSISTED ON HAVING HIS PICTURE 94 00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:49,693 ON THE FRONT PAGE. 95 00:03:49,695 --> 00:03:53,364 WHAT AN IDIOT HE LOOKS. 96 00:03:53,366 --> 00:03:56,066 GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN! 97 00:03:58,002 --> 00:04:00,237 AH, I SEE YOU ARE ALL READING THE PAPER. 98 00:04:00,239 --> 00:04:02,540 THE COLONEL, HE WAS JUST SAYING 99 00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:05,509 HOW HANDSOME YOU LOOK ON THE FRONT PAGE. 100 00:04:05,511 --> 00:04:07,911 YES, I DO LOOK RATHER DASHING, DON'T I? 101 00:04:07,913 --> 00:04:09,647 THAT IS AN EXCELLENT ARTICLE, GRUBER. 102 00:04:09,649 --> 00:04:11,515 YOU WROTE ABOUT HOW WE ARE WINNING THE WAR. 103 00:04:11,517 --> 00:04:15,519 I MERELY TOOK DOWN YOUR DICTATION, GENERAL. 104 00:04:15,521 --> 00:04:17,221 WHY YOU NO PRINT HOW THE ITALIANS 105 00:04:17,223 --> 00:04:18,522 ARE WINNING THE WAR? 106 00:04:18,524 --> 00:04:20,624 WHEN YOU START, WE WILL. 107 00:04:22,594 --> 00:04:25,496 NOW, COLONEL, I'VE HAD ANOTHER IDEA FOR CEMENTING RELATIONSHIPS 108 00:04:25,498 --> 00:04:27,097 WITH THE CONQUERED FRENCH PEASANTS. 109 00:04:27,099 --> 00:04:28,765 I AM ALL EARS. 110 00:04:28,767 --> 00:04:30,133 A MARRIAGE BETWEEN AN OFFICER 111 00:04:30,135 --> 00:04:32,769 OF THE OCCUPYING FORCES AND A FRENCH PEASANT WOMAN 112 00:04:32,771 --> 00:04:35,038 WOULD BE AN EXCELLENT PROPAGANDA COUP. 113 00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:37,040 I AM NOT SURE THAT THE PEASANTS 114 00:04:37,042 --> 00:04:38,609 ARE TOO KEEN ON MARRYING MEMBERS 115 00:04:38,611 --> 00:04:40,244 OF THE OCCUPYING FORCES. 116 00:04:40,246 --> 00:04:42,346 THE PROSPECTIVE HUSBAND MUST PERSUADE HER 117 00:04:42,348 --> 00:04:43,447 THAT IT IS A GOOD IDEA. 118 00:04:43,449 --> 00:04:45,382 I'VE ALREADY SELECTED THE WOMAN. 119 00:04:46,384 --> 00:04:49,853 THIS ONE. THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION. 120 00:04:49,855 --> 00:04:51,922 BUT THAT'S MADAME EDITH FROM THE CAFE. 121 00:04:51,924 --> 00:04:54,592 AS I UNDERSTAND IT, ALWAYS VERY FRIENDLY TOWARDS YOU. 122 00:04:54,594 --> 00:04:57,094 I DON'T FANCY CEMENTING RELATIONS 123 00:04:57,096 --> 00:04:58,895 WITH MADAM EDITH. 124 00:04:58,897 --> 00:05:00,931 YOU WON'T HAVE TO. YOU'RE ALREADY MARRIED. 125 00:05:00,933 --> 00:05:04,101 OH, YES. SO, I AM. 126 00:05:04,103 --> 00:05:06,237 THANK HEAVENS. 127 00:05:06,239 --> 00:05:08,105 LIEUTENANT GRUBER AND CAPTAIN BERTORELLI 128 00:05:08,107 --> 00:05:09,506 WILL DRAW STRAWS FOR THE HONOR 129 00:05:09,508 --> 00:05:10,841 OF PROPOSING TO HER. 130 00:05:10,843 --> 00:05:12,876 BUT WE DON'T HAVE ANY STRAWS, 131 00:05:12,878 --> 00:05:15,246 AND I AM NOT OF THE MARRYING KIND. 132 00:05:15,248 --> 00:05:16,913 I AM MORE THE LOVE 'EM AND LEAVE 'EM. 133 00:05:17,915 --> 00:05:19,082 SILENCE. 134 00:05:20,552 --> 00:05:23,153 YOU WILL DRAW PENCILS. 135 00:05:23,155 --> 00:05:24,788 WHOEVER GETS THE SHORTER ONE, 136 00:05:24,790 --> 00:05:27,057 WILL MARRY THE PEASANT. 137 00:05:27,059 --> 00:05:28,925 AND THEN, OF COURSE, WHEN THE WAR IS OVER, 138 00:05:28,927 --> 00:05:30,327 WE CAN HAVE IT CANCELED. 139 00:05:33,331 --> 00:05:34,831 HEH HEH HEH. BAD LUCK. 140 00:05:38,637 --> 00:05:40,804 GENERAL, I CANNOT DO IT. 141 00:05:40,806 --> 00:05:41,838 WHAT? 142 00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:44,541 WELL, MY MOTHER HAS ALWAYS HOPED 143 00:05:44,543 --> 00:05:48,845 THAT I WOULD MARRY A NICE BLONDE GERMAN. 144 00:05:48,847 --> 00:05:52,149 A GIRL, THAT IS. 145 00:05:52,151 --> 00:05:54,385 HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN VERY RETICENT 146 00:05:54,387 --> 00:05:56,086 WHERE WOMEN OF THE OPPOSITE SEX 147 00:05:56,088 --> 00:05:57,354 ARE CONCERNED. 148 00:05:57,356 --> 00:05:58,989 THIS IS TRUE. 149 00:05:58,991 --> 00:06:01,425 ON THE OTHER HAND, CAPTAIN BERTORELLI HERE 150 00:06:01,427 --> 00:06:03,894 IS ALWAYS TELLING US HE'S IRRESISTIBLE, 151 00:06:03,896 --> 00:06:06,563 TO WOMEN OF THE OPPOSITE SEX. 152 00:06:06,565 --> 00:06:07,564 REALLY? 153 00:06:07,566 --> 00:06:08,599 HE NEVER FAILS. 154 00:06:08,601 --> 00:06:10,601 THEN CAPTAIN BERTORELLI WILL MARRY 155 00:06:10,603 --> 00:06:11,635 THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION. 156 00:06:11,637 --> 00:06:12,636 BUT, GENERAL-- 157 00:06:12,638 --> 00:06:14,338 QUIET! THAT IS AN ORDER. 158 00:06:14,340 --> 00:06:16,072 WHY CAN'T I MARRY ONE OF THE WAITRESSES? 159 00:06:16,074 --> 00:06:18,676 THE TALL ONE WITH THE NICE BUM? 160 00:06:19,811 --> 00:06:21,578 YOU WILL DO AS YOU'RE TOLD. 161 00:06:21,580 --> 00:06:23,180 IF, HOWEVER, SHE REFUSES YOU, 162 00:06:23,182 --> 00:06:25,115 THEN YOU CAN HAVE A GO AT THE WAITRESS. 163 00:06:25,117 --> 00:06:26,983 I AM SUDDENLY DEPRESSED. 164 00:06:26,985 --> 00:06:30,053 LOOK, MY FEATHERS-- THEY DROOP. 165 00:06:30,055 --> 00:06:31,855 CAPTAIN BERTORELLI, REMEMBER, 166 00:06:31,857 --> 00:06:34,525 THE MONEY FROM THE CAFE WILL KEEP YOU IN COMFORT. 167 00:06:34,527 --> 00:06:37,194 AND YOU CAN CHASE THE WAITRESSES ALL NIGHT, 168 00:06:37,196 --> 00:06:40,230 WHILST THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION IS ASLEEP. 169 00:06:40,232 --> 00:06:41,932 YOU'RE RIGHT. 170 00:06:41,934 --> 00:06:43,434 IN THE DAY I MAKE THE MONEY. 171 00:06:43,436 --> 00:06:45,836 IN THE NIGHT I MAKE THE PASS. 172 00:06:45,838 --> 00:06:48,171 MADAM EDITH, SHE WILL NOT RESIST ME. 173 00:06:48,173 --> 00:06:50,741 I GO TO THE CAFE TODAY TO ASK FOR HER HAND. 174 00:06:50,743 --> 00:06:53,009 GOOD, AND WE WILL HAVE A RECEPTION AT THE CHATEAU 175 00:06:53,011 --> 00:06:54,845 TO MAKE THE OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT. 176 00:06:54,847 --> 00:06:57,581 COLONEL, YOU CAN INVITE ALL THE LOCAL DIGNITARIES. 177 00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:58,582 HEIL HITLER. 178 00:06:58,584 --> 00:06:59,650 HEIL HITLER. 179 00:06:59,652 --> 00:07:00,851 HEIL MUSSOLINI. 180 00:07:02,654 --> 00:07:03,920 ( chuckles ) 181 00:07:05,189 --> 00:07:06,824 WHAT IF SHE SAYS NO? 182 00:07:06,826 --> 00:07:08,058 NONSENSE. 183 00:07:08,060 --> 00:07:10,193 YOU ARE THE MOST HANDSOME MAN IN NOUVION. 184 00:07:11,329 --> 00:07:13,263 YOU'LL GET THE CAFE AND THE GIRLS. 185 00:07:13,265 --> 00:07:15,466 YES, IT'S CALLED HAVING YOUR CAKE AND EATING IT. 186 00:07:15,468 --> 00:07:17,768 THE CAFE IS OKAY, 187 00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:21,004 BUT THE CRUMBLY OLD CAKE I COULD DO WITHOUT. 188 00:07:23,675 --> 00:07:25,743 YOU WANTED TO SEE ME, HERR FLICK? 189 00:07:25,745 --> 00:07:27,511 YES, VON SMALLHAUSEN. 190 00:07:27,513 --> 00:07:30,213 MY INFORMANTS TELL ME THAT THE PAINTING 191 00:07:30,215 --> 00:07:32,416 OF THE FALLEN MADONNA WITH THE BIG BOOBIES, 192 00:07:32,418 --> 00:07:34,485 WHICH WAS STOLEN FROM UNDER MY NOSE 193 00:07:34,487 --> 00:07:35,886 WHILE MY BACK WAS TURNED, 194 00:07:35,888 --> 00:07:39,022 IS ON DISPLAY IN GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN'S 195 00:07:39,024 --> 00:07:40,824 QUARTERS AT THE CHATEAU. 196 00:07:40,826 --> 00:07:43,394 CURSE! IT IS BEYOND OUR REACH. 197 00:07:43,396 --> 00:07:46,296 NOTHING IS BEYOND THE REACH OF THE GESTAPO. 198 00:07:46,298 --> 00:07:48,532 BUT THE CHATEAU IS HEAVILY GUARDED 199 00:07:48,534 --> 00:07:49,767 IN FRONT, HERR FLICK, 200 00:07:49,769 --> 00:07:51,635 AND THERE IS A MOAT AT THE REAR. 201 00:07:51,637 --> 00:07:53,737 HOW WILL WE GET IN? 202 00:07:53,739 --> 00:07:56,407 WE WILL SWIM ACROSS THE MOAT 203 00:07:56,409 --> 00:07:57,474 IN THESE... 204 00:07:59,477 --> 00:08:02,479 ...SPECIAL GESTAPO FROGMEN SUITS. 205 00:08:03,481 --> 00:08:05,416 WE WILL THEN SCALE THE WALL 206 00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:08,485 WITH THE AID OF THIS COMPRESSED AIR MECHANISM, 207 00:08:08,487 --> 00:08:10,754 WHICH WILL FIRE THIS GRAPPLING IRON 208 00:08:10,756 --> 00:08:13,189 ONTO THE ROOF OF THE CASTLE. 209 00:08:13,191 --> 00:08:14,825 WE WILL THEN CREATE A DIVERSION, 210 00:08:14,827 --> 00:08:16,393 AND STEAL THE PAINTING. 211 00:08:16,395 --> 00:08:19,296 THERE IS ONE PROBLEM WITH YOUR PLAN, HERR FLICK. 212 00:08:19,298 --> 00:08:20,397 AND WHAT IS THIS? 213 00:08:20,399 --> 00:08:21,732 I CANNOT SWIM. 214 00:08:21,734 --> 00:08:24,501 CLIMB ONTO THE TABLE, VON SMALLHAUSEN, 215 00:08:24,503 --> 00:08:25,836 AND LIE UPON YOUR FACE. 216 00:08:27,371 --> 00:08:29,139 YES, HERR FLICK. 217 00:08:31,142 --> 00:08:32,509 I HAVE HERE... 218 00:08:32,511 --> 00:08:35,011 ... THE GESTAPO MANUAL ENTITLED, 219 00:08:35,013 --> 00:08:38,415 "LEARNING TO SWIM VERY VERY QUICKLY." 220 00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:40,984 WE WILL START WITH THE BREAST STROKE. 221 00:08:44,055 --> 00:08:47,190 FASTER, VON SMALLHAUSEN. IT IS A VERY WIDE MOAT. 222 00:08:52,163 --> 00:08:54,164 YOU MUST HELP ME. IT IS URGENT. 223 00:08:54,166 --> 00:08:57,100 I HAVE TAKEN ENOUGH RISKS ALREADY. 224 00:08:57,102 --> 00:08:58,835 WHAT IS SO URGENT THAT YOU COME HERE 225 00:08:58,837 --> 00:09:00,537 IN DAYLIGHT, THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR? 226 00:09:00,539 --> 00:09:03,407 WELL, AS YOU KNOW, I AM CONSTANTLY ON THE MOVE. 227 00:09:03,409 --> 00:09:06,042 I'VE HAD NO TIME TO DO MY WASHING. 228 00:09:06,044 --> 00:09:07,645 PLEASE KEEP THE WHITES SEPARATE, 229 00:09:07,647 --> 00:09:09,980 TWO DRYS, AND TRY NOT TO SHRINK THE UNDERWEAR. 230 00:09:09,982 --> 00:09:12,783 I NEED TO BE ABLE TO MOVE QUICKLY IN AN EMERGENCY. 231 00:09:14,018 --> 00:09:16,687 RENE, LIEUTENANT GRUBER IS HEADING THIS WAY. 232 00:09:16,689 --> 00:09:18,555 I WAS AT THE BUTCHER'S. I CAME TO WARN YOU. 233 00:09:18,557 --> 00:09:20,223 TAKE THE WASHING INTO THE KITCHEN. 234 00:09:20,225 --> 00:09:21,425 MICHELLE, QUICK. 235 00:09:21,427 --> 00:09:23,093 COME WITH ME INTO THE BACK ROOM. 236 00:09:23,095 --> 00:09:24,094 QUICK, QUICK, QUICK. 237 00:09:26,230 --> 00:09:28,832 RENE, I'M SO GLAD I FOUND YOU ALONE. 238 00:09:28,834 --> 00:09:30,534 ONLY JUST. 239 00:09:31,803 --> 00:09:34,104 I HAVE COME TO WARN YOU. 240 00:09:34,106 --> 00:09:35,939 GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN, 241 00:09:35,941 --> 00:09:38,208 IN THE INTERESTS OF IMPROVING RELATIONS 242 00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:40,611 WITH THE PEASANTS, HAS ORDERED CAPTAIN BERTORELLI 243 00:09:40,613 --> 00:09:42,145 TO MARRY MADAM EDITH. 244 00:09:42,147 --> 00:09:43,414 NO. 245 00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:44,881 YES. 246 00:09:44,883 --> 00:09:47,718 BUT WHY DID HE PICK ON HER? 247 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:50,987 AND THEN AGAIN, WHY PICK ON HIM? 248 00:09:50,989 --> 00:09:54,692 SHE IS THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION. 249 00:09:54,694 --> 00:09:56,460 WHAT BETTER CHOICE COULD THERE BE? 250 00:09:56,462 --> 00:09:57,894 OH MY GOD. 251 00:09:57,896 --> 00:10:00,597 SO, CONFIDENT IS THE GENERAL OF THE OUTCOME, 252 00:10:00,599 --> 00:10:02,633 THAT HE HAS ORGANIZED A RECEPTION 253 00:10:02,635 --> 00:10:04,635 FOR THE VILLAGE DIGNITARIES AT THE CHATEAU, 254 00:10:04,637 --> 00:10:06,069 TO ANNOUNCE THE ENGAGEMENT. 255 00:10:06,071 --> 00:10:07,304 WHAT A NERVE. 256 00:10:07,306 --> 00:10:08,972 OF COURSE, SHE WILL REFUSE. 257 00:10:08,974 --> 00:10:11,675 IT MIGHT BE BETTER IF YOU GOT MADAM EDITH 258 00:10:11,677 --> 00:10:12,843 INTO HIDING, 259 00:10:12,845 --> 00:10:16,413 IN CASE SHE FALLS FOR HIS IRRESISTIBLE CHARM, 260 00:10:16,415 --> 00:10:20,250 WHICH I MUST SAY ESCAPES ME. 261 00:10:20,252 --> 00:10:22,686 I AM GRATEFUL, LIEUTENANT, FOR THE WARNING. 262 00:10:22,688 --> 00:10:25,889 IF I CAN SAVE ANYONE FROM THE TORTURE 263 00:10:25,891 --> 00:10:28,726 OF MATRIMONY, I WILL. 264 00:10:28,728 --> 00:10:31,928 IF ONLY YOU HAD BEEN AROUND 25 YEARS AGO. 265 00:10:33,365 --> 00:10:35,999 IF ONLY I HAD. 266 00:10:40,972 --> 00:10:43,206 WE HEARD EVERY WORD. 267 00:10:43,208 --> 00:10:45,743 RENE, WHY DID YOU NOT TELL THE LIEUTENANT 268 00:10:45,745 --> 00:10:47,578 THAT YOU ARE MARRIED TO ME? 269 00:10:47,580 --> 00:10:49,413 YOU WERE MARRIED TO THE RENE WHO WAS SHOT. 270 00:10:49,415 --> 00:10:50,881 I AM HIS TWIN BROTHER FROM NANCY. 271 00:10:50,883 --> 00:10:53,484 HOW QUICKLY YOU FORGET THE PLOT. 272 00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:55,419 WHEN HE PROPOSES, I SHALL TELL THAT ITAI 273 00:10:55,421 --> 00:10:56,520 TO GET KNOTTED. 274 00:10:56,522 --> 00:10:58,989 OH, NO, LET'S NOT BE HASTY. 275 00:10:58,991 --> 00:11:01,057 EVERY CLOUD HAS A SILVER LINING. 276 00:11:01,059 --> 00:11:03,861 THEY ARE TO HOLD A RECEPTION AT THE CHATEAU, 277 00:11:03,863 --> 00:11:05,529 WHICH GIVES US A SPLENDID CHANCE 278 00:11:05,531 --> 00:11:06,830 TO GET THE BRITISH AIRMEN OUT. 279 00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:09,132 NO, I AM SORRY. IT IS OUT OF THE QUESTION. 280 00:11:09,134 --> 00:11:10,501 BUT, DO YOU NOT SEE? 281 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:12,403 IF THE AIRMEN ARE FOUND IN THE WINE BARRELS 282 00:11:12,405 --> 00:11:14,571 THAT CAME FROM YOUR CELLAR, YOU COULD BE SHOT. 283 00:11:14,573 --> 00:11:16,072 I KNOW THAT. 284 00:11:16,074 --> 00:11:17,741 BUT YOU CANNOT JUST WALK OUT OF THERE 285 00:11:17,743 --> 00:11:19,576 WITH TWO WINE BARRELS. 286 00:11:19,578 --> 00:11:20,744 WE DO NOT HAVE TO. 287 00:11:20,746 --> 00:11:23,814 I HAVE MADE SOME PRELIMINARY NOTES. 288 00:11:26,317 --> 00:11:28,952 BENEATH THE CELLARS IS AN UNDERGROUND STREAM. 289 00:11:28,954 --> 00:11:31,789 WE CAN DROP THE BARRELS WITH THE AIRMEN INTO IT. 290 00:11:31,791 --> 00:11:33,990 THE BARRELS WILL FLOAT DOWN THE RIVER, 291 00:11:33,992 --> 00:11:35,726 AND OUT TO SEA, TO RENDEZVOUS 292 00:11:35,728 --> 00:11:37,728 WITH THE BOAT SQUADRON FROM ENGLAND. 293 00:11:37,730 --> 00:11:40,931 BUT THE CHATEAU WILL BE FULL OF GERMANS. 294 00:11:40,933 --> 00:11:42,666 AND HOW DO WE GET INTO THE CELLAR? 295 00:11:42,668 --> 00:11:43,967 LISTEN. 296 00:11:43,969 --> 00:11:46,102 THERE IS A TUNNEL TO THE CELLARS 297 00:11:46,104 --> 00:11:47,504 FROM THE MONASTERY. 298 00:11:47,506 --> 00:11:50,741 A LOCKED DOOR PREVENTS ENTRY TO THE CELLARS. 299 00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:52,743 YOU MUST OPEN THE DOOR FROM THE INSIDE 300 00:11:52,745 --> 00:11:54,344 DURING THE RECEPTION, AND LET US IN. 301 00:11:54,346 --> 00:11:55,679 IT IS A PERFECT PLAN. 302 00:11:55,681 --> 00:11:58,081 BUT HOW DO WE GET TO THE CELLAR FROM THE RECEPTION? 303 00:11:58,083 --> 00:11:59,650 THE LIVING QUARTERS OF THE GENERAL 304 00:11:59,652 --> 00:12:00,951 ARE AT THE TOP OF THE CHATEAU. 305 00:12:00,953 --> 00:12:03,587 ONE PAIR OF KNICKERS AND THREE POUNDS OF SAUSAGES. 306 00:12:06,057 --> 00:12:07,458 NO, NO, I'M SORRY, 307 00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:10,427 I WILL READ THAT AGAIN, THOSE ARE PERSONAL NOTES. 308 00:12:10,429 --> 00:12:13,464 I'M GLAD TO HEAR IT. 309 00:12:13,466 --> 00:12:15,632 THERE IS A DUMBWAITER OUTSIDE THE ROOM 310 00:12:15,634 --> 00:12:17,468 OF GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN. 311 00:12:17,470 --> 00:12:19,870 YOU WILL PUT IN IT YOUR SMALL WAITRESS, MIMI, 312 00:12:19,872 --> 00:12:21,472 AND WIND HER DOWN TO THE CELLAR. 313 00:12:21,474 --> 00:12:23,640 SHE WILL UNLOCK THE INTERCONNECTING DOOR. 314 00:12:23,642 --> 00:12:24,975 I WILL ENTER WITH MY GIRLS 315 00:12:24,977 --> 00:12:26,443 AND DROP THE BARRELS INTO THE STREAM. 316 00:12:26,445 --> 00:12:27,478 IT IS SIMPLE. 317 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,046 ♪ O SOLE MIO... ♪ 318 00:12:30,048 --> 00:12:32,649 IT IS CAPTAIN BERTORELLI APPROACHING NOW. 319 00:12:32,651 --> 00:12:35,251 YOU WILL BE DOING THIS FOR FRANCE, EDITH. 320 00:12:35,253 --> 00:12:36,920 YOU MUST SAY YES. 321 00:12:36,922 --> 00:12:38,021 BE BRAVE, MADAM EDITH, 322 00:12:38,023 --> 00:12:39,289 AND DON'T WORRY, 323 00:12:39,291 --> 00:12:41,324 WE'LL GET YOU OUT OF IT BEFORE THE WEDDING. 324 00:12:41,326 --> 00:12:43,760 EXCUSE ME WHILE I VANISH INTO THE BACK ROOM. 325 00:12:43,762 --> 00:12:46,262 ( singing in Italian ) 326 00:12:46,264 --> 00:12:50,033 AH, THE BEAUTIFUL LADY. 327 00:12:50,035 --> 00:12:52,603 I BRING YOU THESE BEAUTIFUL FLOWERS. 328 00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,204 THAT IS VERY KIND OF YOU. 329 00:12:54,206 --> 00:12:55,839 ( coughs ) 330 00:12:55,841 --> 00:12:57,774 I DON'T BEAT ABOUT THE BUSH, MADAM EDITH. 331 00:12:57,776 --> 00:12:58,842 I ACCEPT. 332 00:13:00,177 --> 00:13:03,213 I COME HERE TODAY TO ASK FOR YOU HAND IN MARRIAGE. 333 00:13:03,215 --> 00:13:04,247 I ACCEPT. 334 00:13:04,249 --> 00:13:06,416 TOGETHER WE HAVE A WONDERFUL TIME TOGETHER. 335 00:13:06,418 --> 00:13:08,919 WE GO FOR WALKS IN THE MOONLIGHT. 336 00:13:08,921 --> 00:13:10,954 WE KISS WITH PASSION UNDER THE STARS. 337 00:13:10,956 --> 00:13:12,155 I ACCEPT. 338 00:13:12,157 --> 00:13:13,991 THEN WE COME HOME, 339 00:13:13,993 --> 00:13:17,694 AND COUNT THE TAKINGS FROM THE TILL. 340 00:13:17,696 --> 00:13:20,631 I GO ON MY BENDED KNEES, PLEASE SAY YES. 341 00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:23,066 I ALREADY SAID YES. WERE YOU NOT LISTENING? 342 00:13:24,068 --> 00:13:25,235 YOU DID? 343 00:13:25,237 --> 00:13:27,203 OH, MAMMA MIA, THEN IT IS DONE. 344 00:13:27,205 --> 00:13:28,639 TONIGHT WE HAVE A BIG RECEPTION 345 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,073 AT THE CASTLE TO TELL EVERYONE 346 00:13:30,075 --> 00:13:31,474 HOW MUCH WE LOVE EACH OTHER. 347 00:13:31,476 --> 00:13:33,944 NOW I GIVE YOU THE KISS. 348 00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:35,746 JUST A LITTLE ONE. 349 00:14:02,273 --> 00:14:04,207 TONIGHT, WHEN I COME BACK-- 350 00:14:06,611 --> 00:14:09,145 WHEN I COME BACK TO TAKE YOU TO THE RECEPTION, 351 00:14:09,147 --> 00:14:11,314 I BRING YOU THE ENGAGEMENT RING 352 00:14:11,316 --> 00:14:13,050 WITH THE DIAMONDS AND THE SAPPHIRES. 353 00:14:13,052 --> 00:14:16,352 YOU MEAN YOU ARE RICH AS WELL? 354 00:14:16,354 --> 00:14:18,722 DON'T WORRY, I CHARGE IT TO THE BUSINESS. 355 00:14:25,162 --> 00:14:26,730 WELL DONE, MADAM EDITH. 356 00:14:26,732 --> 00:14:28,699 WE SAW AND HEARD EVERYTHING. 357 00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:30,233 OH, RENE, 358 00:14:30,235 --> 00:14:32,335 WHEN HE FORCED HIS LIPS ON MINE 359 00:14:32,337 --> 00:14:34,437 IT MUST HAVE BEEN DIFFICULT FOR YOU 360 00:14:34,439 --> 00:14:36,172 TO CONTROL YOURSELF. 361 00:14:36,174 --> 00:14:38,541 IT WAS. 362 00:14:38,543 --> 00:14:41,011 THERE ARE STILL TEARS IN MY EYES. 363 00:14:41,013 --> 00:14:43,046 AND THEN I REALIZED THAT HE IS MORE INTERESTED 364 00:14:43,048 --> 00:14:45,181 IN THE TAKINGS FROM THE CAFE THAN IN YOU. 365 00:14:45,183 --> 00:14:47,050 OH, RENE. 366 00:14:47,052 --> 00:14:48,284 WHILE YOU STILL LOVE ME, 367 00:14:48,286 --> 00:14:51,154 HIS FINGER WILL NEVER BE ON MY TILL. 368 00:14:54,458 --> 00:14:56,459 THAT IS A GREAT COMFORT. 369 00:14:59,230 --> 00:15:02,132 AH, GOOD, THE SANDWICHES. 370 00:15:02,134 --> 00:15:03,433 YOU THERE? 371 00:15:03,435 --> 00:15:04,501 IS EVERYTHING READY? 372 00:15:04,503 --> 00:15:05,702 YES, GENERAL. 373 00:15:05,704 --> 00:15:07,837 THE GIRLS MUST MAKE SURE THAT EVERYONE'S GLASSES 374 00:15:07,839 --> 00:15:08,905 ARE FILLED AT ALL TIMES. 375 00:15:08,907 --> 00:15:11,641 THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A HAPPY OCCASION. 376 00:15:11,643 --> 00:15:13,310 THE INVITED DIGNITARIES ARE HERE. 377 00:15:13,312 --> 00:15:14,711 OH, ANNOUNCE THEM. 378 00:15:15,713 --> 00:15:18,148 THE HEAD OF THE NOUVION POLICE! 379 00:15:20,784 --> 00:15:22,385 GOOD MOANING. 380 00:15:22,387 --> 00:15:24,988 I AM VIRY PLOSED TO MOOT YOU, 381 00:15:24,990 --> 00:15:26,689 GENERAL VON KLONKERHIFFEN, 382 00:15:26,691 --> 00:15:29,126 LIEUTENANT GREEBER, 383 00:15:30,128 --> 00:15:31,761 COLONEL VON STREAM. 384 00:15:32,763 --> 00:15:34,197 MONSIEUR ALPHONSE, 385 00:15:34,199 --> 00:15:36,032 THE MAYOR, THE UNDERTAKER, 386 00:15:36,034 --> 00:15:37,234 THE HAIRDRESSER, 387 00:15:37,236 --> 00:15:38,668 THE VINEYARD OWNER, 388 00:15:38,670 --> 00:15:39,969 AND THE PHOTOGRAPHER. 389 00:15:41,239 --> 00:15:43,373 WHERE ARE THE OTHER FIVE PEOPLE YOU ANNOUNCED? 390 00:15:43,375 --> 00:15:47,076 PARDON? OH, THEY ARE ALL ME, GENERAL. 391 00:15:47,078 --> 00:15:48,478 ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE MYSELF. 392 00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:50,247 MY CARD. MONSIEUR ALPHONSE, 393 00:15:50,249 --> 00:15:53,450 FUNERALS AND BURIALS, SWIFTLY AND WITH STYLE. 394 00:15:53,452 --> 00:15:55,752 FORTUNATELY, I AM IN GOOD HEALTH. 395 00:15:55,754 --> 00:15:57,720 MONSIEUR AND MADAM LECLERC. 396 00:16:02,793 --> 00:16:06,296 I DO NOT SHAKE HANDS WITH GERMANS. 397 00:16:06,298 --> 00:16:07,930 I SPIT ON THEM. 398 00:16:07,932 --> 00:16:09,966 ( spits ) 399 00:16:09,968 --> 00:16:11,100 EXCUSE ME, GENERAL. 400 00:16:11,102 --> 00:16:12,402 SHE IS A LITTLE BIT-- 401 00:16:12,404 --> 00:16:14,704 NOW SETTLE DOWN, YOU OLD BAT. 402 00:16:14,706 --> 00:16:16,373 HERE, MADAM FANNY, HAVE A DRINK, 403 00:16:16,375 --> 00:16:17,707 IT WILL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER. 404 00:16:17,709 --> 00:16:18,708 ARE YOU MAD? 405 00:16:18,710 --> 00:16:20,177 SHE MUST KEEP OFF THE BOOZE. 406 00:16:20,179 --> 00:16:22,379 AND REMEMBER, YOU HAVE A PART TO PLAY, 407 00:16:22,381 --> 00:16:24,714 TO GET YOUR OLD DAUGHTER OUT OF THIS ENGAGEMENT. 408 00:16:24,716 --> 00:16:27,584 I AM AN OLD TROOPER. 409 00:16:27,586 --> 00:16:29,686 I WILL NOT FAIL. 410 00:16:29,688 --> 00:16:32,489 QUICK, ERNEST, GIVE ME YOUR HIP FLASK. 411 00:16:32,491 --> 00:16:34,224 BE CAREFUL, FANNY. 412 00:16:34,226 --> 00:16:35,525 IT IS VERY STRONG. 413 00:16:35,527 --> 00:16:37,394 DO NOT SPILL IT ON THE FLOOR, 414 00:16:37,396 --> 00:16:40,163 OR IT WILL TAKE OFF THE POLISH. 415 00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:41,898 OOH. HA HA HA. 416 00:16:41,900 --> 00:16:45,134 AH, THAT HIT THE SPOT. 417 00:16:45,136 --> 00:16:47,537 CAPTAIN BERTORELLI AND HIS FIANCEE, 418 00:16:47,539 --> 00:16:49,472 THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION. 419 00:16:49,474 --> 00:16:51,074 MY WORD, 420 00:16:51,076 --> 00:16:53,142 THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE SEEN MUTTON 421 00:16:53,144 --> 00:16:54,844 ACTUALLY DRESSED AS MUTTON. 422 00:16:57,114 --> 00:16:58,615 WERE THERE ANY PROBLEMS? 423 00:16:58,617 --> 00:17:01,351 APPARENTLY SHE ACCEPTED WITHOUT HESITATION. 424 00:17:01,353 --> 00:17:02,652 I'M NOT A BIT SURPRISED. 425 00:17:02,654 --> 00:17:05,555 THIS IS MY BRIDE TO BE. 426 00:17:05,557 --> 00:17:07,290 MAY I SAY, MADAM EDITH, 427 00:17:07,292 --> 00:17:10,159 YOU HAVE NEVER LOOKED MORE BEAUTIFUL. 428 00:17:10,161 --> 00:17:12,429 THANK YOU, LIEUTENANT. 429 00:17:12,431 --> 00:17:14,097 HERE, I PAY THE COMPLIMENTS, 430 00:17:14,099 --> 00:17:15,565 NOT YOU. 431 00:17:15,567 --> 00:17:17,500 LOOK AT HER. WHAT A BEAUTY. 432 00:17:17,502 --> 00:17:19,001 I AM BLINDED BY LOVE. 433 00:17:19,003 --> 00:17:22,672 THAT'S QUITE OBVIOUS. 434 00:17:22,674 --> 00:17:24,107 OVER HERE. 435 00:17:28,346 --> 00:17:30,547 I MUST CONGRATULATE YOU 436 00:17:30,549 --> 00:17:32,148 ON HELPING WITH OUR WAR EFFORT. 437 00:17:32,150 --> 00:17:34,284 MY CHEST, IT SWELL WITH PRIDE. 438 00:17:34,286 --> 00:17:36,319 DO I GET A MEDALLION? 439 00:17:36,321 --> 00:17:39,389 NO, BUT YOU CERTAINLY DESERVE ONE. 440 00:17:39,391 --> 00:17:42,225 OH, MADAM EDITH. 441 00:17:42,227 --> 00:17:43,627 IF YOU MARRY THIS MAN, 442 00:17:43,629 --> 00:17:45,495 YOU WILL BREAK MY TICKER, 443 00:17:45,497 --> 00:17:47,764 WHICH IS ALREADY DICKY. 444 00:17:47,766 --> 00:17:49,399 DON'T WORRY, MONSIEUR ALPHONSE. 445 00:17:49,401 --> 00:17:51,801 I AM ONLY GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS. 446 00:17:51,803 --> 00:17:54,137 I SHUDDER TO THINK 447 00:17:54,139 --> 00:17:55,705 OF YOU GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS 448 00:17:55,707 --> 00:17:58,642 WITH THIS FEATHERED WOP. 449 00:17:58,644 --> 00:18:01,444 I GNASH SOME OF MY TEETH. 450 00:18:01,446 --> 00:18:03,413 PLEASE, CONTROL YOURSELF. 451 00:18:03,415 --> 00:18:04,514 I CANNOT. 452 00:18:04,516 --> 00:18:05,749 AS A MATTER OF PRINCIPLE, 453 00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:08,918 I MUST CHALLENGE MY RIVAL TO A DUEL. 454 00:18:10,254 --> 00:18:12,322 IT IS EXPECTED. 455 00:18:14,858 --> 00:18:16,693 A WORD WITH YOU, MONSIEUR. 456 00:18:16,695 --> 00:18:17,927 WHAT'S UP? 457 00:18:17,929 --> 00:18:20,263 YOU HAVE TAKEN THE HAND OF THE WOMAN I LOVE. 458 00:18:20,265 --> 00:18:22,965 I DEMAND SATISFACTION. IT IS A LOCAL CUSTOM. 459 00:18:22,967 --> 00:18:27,704 IN ITALY THE HUSBAND GETS THE SATISFACTION. 460 00:18:27,706 --> 00:18:30,707 THE LOCALS DON'T GET A LOOK IN. 461 00:18:30,709 --> 00:18:33,376 I DEMAND THE SATISFACTION 462 00:18:33,378 --> 00:18:35,712 OF A DUEL TO THE DEATH. 463 00:18:35,714 --> 00:18:38,080 NAME YOUR TIME AND PLACE. 464 00:18:38,082 --> 00:18:39,849 AAH. 465 00:18:39,851 --> 00:18:42,251 AAH. 466 00:18:42,253 --> 00:18:43,520 WHAT'S THAT FOR? 467 00:18:43,522 --> 00:18:46,022 IT IS ALSO PART OF THE LOCAL CUSTOM. 468 00:18:46,024 --> 00:18:48,891 OKEY-DOKEY, DAWN TOMORROW, IN THE WOODS. 469 00:18:48,893 --> 00:18:52,429 WELL, I HAVE DONE WHAT IS EXPECTED OF ME. 470 00:18:52,431 --> 00:18:53,830 I MUST INFORM YOU THAT I AM 471 00:18:53,832 --> 00:18:55,498 THE BEST SHOT IN THE ITALIAN ARMY. 472 00:18:55,500 --> 00:18:57,967 IN THAT CASE, I MUST INFORM YOU 473 00:18:57,969 --> 00:19:00,102 THAT I HAVE A PRIOR ENGAGEMENT, 474 00:19:00,104 --> 00:19:03,072 OTHERWISE, I WOULD GO AND EMBALM MYSELF IMMEDIATELY. 475 00:19:04,274 --> 00:19:06,509 - CHEERS. - CHEERS. 476 00:19:13,150 --> 00:19:14,985 ( owl hoots ) 477 00:19:22,493 --> 00:19:25,294 Flick: THAT IS THE WINDOW OF THE GENERAL'S QUARTERS. 478 00:19:25,296 --> 00:19:27,097 IT IS VERY HIGH. 479 00:19:27,099 --> 00:19:30,466 DO NOT BE A WIMP, VON SMALLHAUSEN. 480 00:19:30,468 --> 00:19:31,835 WE CROSS THE MOAT, 481 00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:33,737 FIRE THE GRAPPLING IRON, 482 00:19:33,739 --> 00:19:36,740 CLIMB THE ALMOST INSURMOUNTABLE WALL. 483 00:19:36,742 --> 00:19:38,474 AFTER CREATING A DIVERSION, 484 00:19:38,476 --> 00:19:39,976 WE STEAL THE PAINTING, 485 00:19:39,978 --> 00:19:42,112 AND RETURN TO OUR QUARTERS. 486 00:19:42,114 --> 00:19:43,780 I MUST POINT OUT, HERR FLICK, 487 00:19:43,782 --> 00:19:45,649 I HAVE NOT YET FULLY MASTERED 488 00:19:45,651 --> 00:19:47,651 THE TECHNIQUE OF SWIMMING. 489 00:19:47,653 --> 00:19:50,553 WHAT IF I GET INTO DIFFICULTIES? 490 00:19:50,555 --> 00:19:53,023 YOU WILL CONTINUE WALKING UNDERWATER 491 00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:55,625 FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN. 492 00:19:58,395 --> 00:20:00,429 ARE YOU READY TO GO DOWN INTO THE CELLAR, 493 00:20:00,431 --> 00:20:01,531 MY BRAVE LITTLE MIMI? 494 00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:02,532 FOR YOU, RENE, 495 00:20:02,534 --> 00:20:04,034 I'M ALWAYS READY. 496 00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:05,735 YVETTE WILL LOWER YOU DOWN. 497 00:20:05,737 --> 00:20:07,270 WHY CANNOT I GO? 498 00:20:07,272 --> 00:20:08,772 BECAUSE I AM BRAVER THAN YOU, 499 00:20:08,774 --> 00:20:10,439 AND YOU ARE FATTER THAN ME. 500 00:20:10,441 --> 00:20:12,909 OH, HOW DARE YOU? SHORTY. 501 00:20:12,911 --> 00:20:13,910 FATTY. 502 00:20:13,912 --> 00:20:15,145 - SHORTY. - FATTY. 503 00:20:15,147 --> 00:20:16,746 - SHORTY SHORTY-- - FATTY FATTY-- 504 00:20:16,748 --> 00:20:18,882 STOP THAT, STOP IT YOU TWO. YOU ARE BOTH BRAVE. 505 00:20:18,884 --> 00:20:19,949 NOW COME ALONG, MIMI. 506 00:20:19,951 --> 00:20:20,950 CLIMB IN. 507 00:20:24,889 --> 00:20:26,255 GOOD LUCK, MIMI. 508 00:20:26,257 --> 00:20:27,991 I MUST GET BACK TO THE FESTIVITIES. 509 00:20:27,993 --> 00:20:29,392 AND IF I AM ASKED ABOUT THIS, 510 00:20:29,394 --> 00:20:31,161 OF COURSE I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT IT. 511 00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:32,162 TRUST US. 512 00:20:32,164 --> 00:20:33,396 GOOD, YES. 513 00:20:33,398 --> 00:20:34,964 BE CAREFUL HOW YOU LOWER ME DOWN. 514 00:20:34,966 --> 00:20:36,232 IT IS A LONG DROP. 515 00:20:36,234 --> 00:20:38,735 DO NOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO. 516 00:20:42,740 --> 00:20:44,340 AREN'T YOU ONE OF THE WAITRESSES 517 00:20:44,342 --> 00:20:45,608 FROM THE CAFE? 518 00:20:45,610 --> 00:20:46,843 WHAT IF I AM? 519 00:20:46,845 --> 00:20:49,079 YOU GAVE ME A LITTLE KISS THE OTHER NIGHT, 520 00:20:49,081 --> 00:20:51,480 AND PROMISED ANOTHER THE NEXT TIME WE MET. 521 00:20:51,482 --> 00:20:54,017 I DON'T REMEMBER. 522 00:20:54,019 --> 00:20:55,451 OH! AH! 523 00:20:55,453 --> 00:20:59,989 OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, AH! 524 00:20:59,991 --> 00:21:01,891 I SEE IT'S ALL COMING BACK TO YOU. 525 00:21:01,893 --> 00:21:03,326 OH, OH-- 526 00:21:06,030 --> 00:21:07,864 QUICK, MIMI. 527 00:21:07,866 --> 00:21:10,834 IT IS I, MICHELLE. OPEN THE DOOR. 528 00:21:10,836 --> 00:21:12,535 THE KEY IS BIG AND OLD, 529 00:21:12,537 --> 00:21:14,137 BUT I AM STRONG. 530 00:21:14,139 --> 00:21:15,404 THERE. 531 00:21:15,406 --> 00:21:17,173 WELL DONE. 532 00:21:17,175 --> 00:21:19,042 AH, THERE ARE THE BARRELS. 533 00:21:20,544 --> 00:21:23,312 FAIRFAX? CARSTAIRS? CAN YOU HEAR ME? 534 00:21:25,382 --> 00:21:26,616 - HELLO. - HELLO. 535 00:21:26,618 --> 00:21:27,784 WE'VE COME-- 536 00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:29,018 WE'VE COME TO GET YOU OUT. 537 00:21:29,020 --> 00:21:30,253 ABOUT TIME. 538 00:21:30,255 --> 00:21:32,822 THE RATS HAVE BEEN GNAWING AT MY BUM. 539 00:21:32,824 --> 00:21:34,624 WELL, POP BACK IN, CHAPS. 540 00:21:34,626 --> 00:21:35,959 WE'RE GOING TO DROP YOU IN THE RIVER 541 00:21:35,961 --> 00:21:37,093 AND START YOUR JOURNEY. 542 00:21:37,095 --> 00:21:38,928 JOLLY GOOD. CHEERIO. 543 00:21:38,930 --> 00:21:41,164 MICHELLE, I HOPE THIS PLAN WORKS. 544 00:21:41,166 --> 00:21:42,698 MY SUBSCRIPTION TO WENTWORTH 545 00:21:42,700 --> 00:21:44,634 RUNS OUT NEXT WEEK. 546 00:21:44,636 --> 00:21:46,102 OH, WELL, THAT'S TOO BAD. 547 00:21:46,104 --> 00:21:47,303 CHEERIO. 548 00:21:49,273 --> 00:21:51,274 Michelle: OPEN THE TRAP DOOR. 549 00:21:58,783 --> 00:22:01,284 - ( loud splash ) - AAH! 550 00:22:01,286 --> 00:22:05,288 OOH, OOH, OH, OH, WAAAAH! 551 00:22:06,791 --> 00:22:08,191 ( loud splash ) 552 00:22:11,195 --> 00:22:13,429 QUICK, MIMI. GET BACK BEFORE YOU ARE MISSED. 553 00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:25,574 IS SHE NOT BACK YET? 554 00:22:25,576 --> 00:22:27,243 OH, SHE IS VERY HEAVY. 555 00:22:27,245 --> 00:22:28,344 OH, I WILL DO IT. 556 00:22:28,346 --> 00:22:30,613 - GO AND SERVE THE DRINKS. - ALL RIGHT. 557 00:22:32,416 --> 00:22:35,384 RENE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT HERE? 558 00:22:35,386 --> 00:22:37,586 YOU ARE MISSING ALL THE FUN. 559 00:22:37,588 --> 00:22:39,789 JUST RUNNING OUT OF WINE, LIEUTENANT. 560 00:22:39,791 --> 00:22:41,891 I SENT MIMI DOWN TO GET SOME MORE. 561 00:22:41,893 --> 00:22:43,659 THAT LOOKS LIKE HEAVY WORK. 562 00:22:43,661 --> 00:22:45,061 LET ME GIVE YOU A HAND. 563 00:22:46,396 --> 00:22:48,564 IT IS-- IT IS ALL RIGHT, LIEUTENANT. 564 00:22:48,566 --> 00:22:49,799 I CAN MANAGE. 565 00:22:49,801 --> 00:22:51,000 NONSENSE. 566 00:22:52,336 --> 00:22:56,139 LOOK, I AM TERRIBLY SORRY ABOUT MADAM EDITH. 567 00:22:56,141 --> 00:22:57,941 I WISH I COULD HAVE PREVENTED 568 00:22:57,943 --> 00:23:00,076 THIS DREADFUL ENGAGEMENT. 569 00:23:00,078 --> 00:23:02,545 WELL, THANK YOU FOR TRYING. 570 00:23:02,547 --> 00:23:03,546 DON'T WORRY. 571 00:23:03,548 --> 00:23:05,114 IF YOUR NIGHTS BECOME LONELY, 572 00:23:05,116 --> 00:23:07,984 WE CAN ALWAYS CHAT BY THE BAR. 573 00:23:07,986 --> 00:23:10,153 THAT WOULD BE A GREAT COMFORT. 574 00:23:10,155 --> 00:23:13,156 OH, AH. HERE IS MIMI NOW. 575 00:23:13,158 --> 00:23:15,225 GRUBER, RENE, COME AT ONCE. 576 00:23:15,227 --> 00:23:16,960 THE GENERAL'S ABOUT TO MAKE A SPEECH. 577 00:23:20,064 --> 00:23:21,064 AH. 578 00:23:22,632 --> 00:23:24,700 WELL DONE, MIMI. 579 00:23:25,702 --> 00:23:28,771 I HAVE OVERCOME GREAT DANGER. 580 00:23:28,773 --> 00:23:30,240 HOLD ME AND KISS ME. 581 00:23:30,242 --> 00:23:31,908 YOU WILL JUST HAVE TO SETTLE 582 00:23:31,910 --> 00:23:33,509 FOR A "WELL DONE, MIMI." 583 00:23:38,181 --> 00:23:40,550 SILENCE! 584 00:23:40,552 --> 00:23:43,185 I HAVE INVITED ALL YOU LOCAL PEASANTS 585 00:23:43,187 --> 00:23:44,654 HERE TONIGHT TO HEAR 586 00:23:44,656 --> 00:23:46,155 AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT. 587 00:23:46,157 --> 00:23:48,725 TO CEMENT THE FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN THE OCCUPYING FORCES 588 00:23:48,727 --> 00:23:49,792 AND THE PEASANTS, 589 00:23:49,794 --> 00:23:51,394 I HAVE DECIDED TO GIVE MY PERMISSION 590 00:23:51,396 --> 00:23:52,729 FOR A MARRIAGE TO TAKE PLACE 591 00:23:52,731 --> 00:23:54,196 BETWEEN CAPTAIN BERTORELLI 592 00:23:54,198 --> 00:23:57,400 AND THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION, FROM THE CAFE RENE. 593 00:23:57,402 --> 00:23:58,735 HAVE YOU GOT THE RING? 594 00:24:02,373 --> 00:24:04,374 WHAT A WHOPPER! 595 00:24:06,209 --> 00:24:08,511 IT WILL BE YOURS TONIGHT. 596 00:24:11,114 --> 00:24:13,616 CAPTAIN BERTORELLI IS, OF COURSE, AN ITALIAN, 597 00:24:13,618 --> 00:24:14,950 AND NOT A TRUE ARYAN, 598 00:24:14,952 --> 00:24:17,119 BUT IT'S THE SPIRIT OF THE OCCASION THAT COUNTS. 599 00:24:17,121 --> 00:24:18,488 WHERE IS THE PHOTOGRAPHER? 600 00:24:18,490 --> 00:24:20,122 I AM HERE, GENERAL. 601 00:24:20,124 --> 00:24:21,858 MY EQUIPMENT IS AT THE READY. 602 00:24:21,860 --> 00:24:22,992 WE WILL HAVE THE OFFICIAL 603 00:24:22,994 --> 00:24:25,261 ENGAGEMENT PHOTOGRAPH OVER HERE. 604 00:24:25,263 --> 00:24:27,397 I WISH TO TAKE THIS OPPORTUNITY 605 00:24:27,399 --> 00:24:29,465 TO DISPLAY A FABULOUS ART TREASURE 606 00:24:29,467 --> 00:24:31,166 WHICH HAS BEEN ACQUIRED FOR THE GLORY 607 00:24:31,168 --> 00:24:32,301 OF THE THIRD REICH. 608 00:24:35,873 --> 00:24:37,840 AS YOU WILL SEE, 609 00:24:37,842 --> 00:24:41,744 IT IS THE FALLEN MADONNA WITH THE BIG BOOBIES BY VAN CLOMP, 610 00:24:41,746 --> 00:24:44,046 WHICH WILL SOON BE ON ITS WAY TO THE FUHRER. 611 00:24:44,048 --> 00:24:46,348 LET THIS BE A LESSON TO YOU ALL, 612 00:24:46,350 --> 00:24:48,885 WE GERMANS ALWAYS SUCCEED IN THE END! 613 00:24:48,887 --> 00:24:51,186 ( applause ) 614 00:24:52,355 --> 00:24:53,923 THE HAPPY COUPLE MAY JOIN ME. 615 00:24:56,627 --> 00:24:58,994 COME ALONG, YOU OLD BAT. THIS IS THE MOMENT. 616 00:24:58,996 --> 00:24:59,995 WHAT? 617 00:24:59,997 --> 00:25:01,531 IT IS MY PLEASURE TO ANNOUNCE 618 00:25:01,533 --> 00:25:02,899 THIS ENGAGEMENT OFFICIALLY, 619 00:25:02,901 --> 00:25:04,901 AND I TRUST YOU WILL ALL JOIN ME 620 00:25:04,903 --> 00:25:07,036 IN WISHING CAPTAIN BERTORELLI AND HIS BRIDE TO BE 621 00:25:07,038 --> 00:25:08,237 EVERY HAPPINESS. 622 00:25:08,239 --> 00:25:10,272 I DO NOT. 623 00:25:10,274 --> 00:25:11,507 WHO SAID THAT? 624 00:25:11,509 --> 00:25:13,709 MY DAUGHTER EDITH 625 00:25:13,711 --> 00:25:17,513 WILL NEVER MARRY THAT UGLY FEATHERED WOP 626 00:25:17,515 --> 00:25:20,249 AS LONG AS I HAVE A BREATH 627 00:25:20,251 --> 00:25:21,551 LEFT IN M-Y-Y 628 00:25:21,553 --> 00:25:23,853 ( screaming ) BODY-Y-Y-Y-Y! 629 00:25:23,855 --> 00:25:26,722 WHO IS THE NUTCASE? 630 00:25:26,724 --> 00:25:28,791 SHE IS KIPTIN BERTOROLLI'S 631 00:25:28,793 --> 00:25:30,359 FUTURE MOTHER INLOO. 632 00:25:30,361 --> 00:25:32,161 MY MOTHER INLOO? 633 00:25:32,163 --> 00:25:33,930 I WILL CUT YOU OFF 634 00:25:33,932 --> 00:25:36,198 WITHOUT A SOU, YOU TRAITRESS. 635 00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:39,301 YOU WILL NEVER HAVE MY CAFE NOW. 636 00:25:39,303 --> 00:25:40,770 HER CAFE? 637 00:25:40,772 --> 00:25:42,404 BUT I THOUGHT IT WAS YOUR CAFE? 638 00:25:42,406 --> 00:25:43,840 IT IS MAMMA'S. 639 00:25:43,842 --> 00:25:46,442 SHE SHALL NEVER 640 00:25:46,444 --> 00:25:48,578 DISGRACE MY FAMILY 641 00:25:48,580 --> 00:25:50,646 BY MARRYING THAT DAGO. 642 00:25:50,648 --> 00:25:52,882 DAGO? I'M FROM NAPOLI. 643 00:25:52,884 --> 00:25:55,485 THAT'S EVEN WORSE. 644 00:25:55,487 --> 00:25:57,453 I'VE CHANGED MY MIND. THE WEDDING IT'S OFF. 645 00:25:57,455 --> 00:25:59,589 YOU COULD LOSE YOUR RANK AND MEDALS FOR THIS. 646 00:25:59,591 --> 00:26:00,790 YOU CAN KEEP THE MEDALS. 647 00:26:00,792 --> 00:26:03,225 MUSSOLINI, HE MADE ME THE CAPTAIN, NOT YOU. 648 00:26:05,462 --> 00:26:07,229 General: TO HELL WITH MUSSOLINI! 649 00:26:07,231 --> 00:26:08,664 THAT IS THE LAST TIME 650 00:26:08,666 --> 00:26:10,900 I TRUST AN ITAI WITH A SILLY WALK. 651 00:26:12,268 --> 00:26:13,669 I SEE THE PAINTING 652 00:26:13,671 --> 00:26:15,705 OF THE FALLEN MADONNA WITH THE BIG BOOBIES. 653 00:26:15,707 --> 00:26:17,206 IT IS TIME TO ACTIVATE 654 00:26:17,208 --> 00:26:19,542 OUR SPECIAL GESTAPO FIRE ALARM 655 00:26:19,544 --> 00:26:20,943 AS A DIVERSION. 656 00:26:20,945 --> 00:26:22,712 I AM READY, HERR FLICK. 657 00:26:24,180 --> 00:26:26,816 VERY WELL, ACTIVATE YOUR HELMET. 658 00:26:28,418 --> 00:26:30,586 ( fire alarm clanging ) 659 00:26:32,823 --> 00:26:34,490 FIRE ALARM, GENERAL! 660 00:26:34,492 --> 00:26:36,158 QUICK, EVACUATE THE ROOM. QUICK! 661 00:26:47,437 --> 00:26:49,071 DEACTIVATE THE FIRE ALARM, 662 00:26:49,073 --> 00:26:50,105 VON SMALLHAUSEN. 663 00:26:50,107 --> 00:26:52,542 - WHAT? - SWITCH IT OFF. 664 00:26:57,714 --> 00:26:59,715 NOW, JUMP. 665 00:27:01,718 --> 00:27:04,319 HOW DO WE KNOW THE MOAT IS DEEP ENOUGH 666 00:27:04,321 --> 00:27:06,522 TO BREAK OUR FALL, HERR FLICK? 667 00:27:06,524 --> 00:27:08,925 YOU WILL TEST IT. 668 00:27:08,927 --> 00:27:10,225 AAH! 669 00:27:11,227 --> 00:27:12,494 ( thud ) 670 00:27:16,266 --> 00:27:18,233 OBVIOUSLY NOT. 671 00:27:19,302 --> 00:27:21,336 THAT WAS NOT EVEN OUR FIRE ALARM. 672 00:27:21,338 --> 00:27:22,872 THERE MUST BE ANOTHER ONE SOMEWHERE. 673 00:27:22,874 --> 00:27:24,506 THE PICTURE IS GONE. 674 00:27:24,508 --> 00:27:27,409 I'M NOT BLIND. GUARDS, SEARCH FOR INTRUDERS. 675 00:27:27,411 --> 00:27:30,012 IT COULD NOT HAVE BEEN ONE OF THE POSANTS, 676 00:27:30,014 --> 00:27:32,915 AS WE WERE ALL OUTSOD IN THE PISSAGE. 677 00:27:38,589 --> 00:27:40,522 Rene: WHAT AN EVENING. 678 00:27:40,524 --> 00:27:41,958 Edith: BUT A SUCCESSFUL ONE. 679 00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:44,126 I GOT OUT OF MARRYING CAPTAIN BERTORELLI. 680 00:27:44,128 --> 00:27:45,294 ( laughter ) 681 00:27:45,296 --> 00:27:47,496 Mimi: AND MICHELLE GOT THE BRITISH AIRMEN AWAY. 682 00:27:47,498 --> 00:27:48,831 THANK GOODNESS WE WILL NEVER 683 00:27:48,833 --> 00:27:50,733 HAVE TO SEE THOSE TWO BRITISH IDIOTS AGAIN. 684 00:27:50,735 --> 00:27:51,734 ( laughing ) 685 00:27:51,736 --> 00:27:52,868 Fairfax: HELLO? 686 00:27:54,337 --> 00:27:57,239 TELL ME THIS IS A DREAM. 687 00:27:57,241 --> 00:27:58,808 Fairfax: I SAY, 688 00:27:58,810 --> 00:28:00,810 WE SEEM TO HAVE TAKEN THE WRONG PASSAGE 689 00:28:00,812 --> 00:28:02,645 IN THE UNDERGROUND STREAM. 690 00:28:02,647 --> 00:28:05,114 Carstairs: THE GRATING'S JAMMED. 691 00:28:05,116 --> 00:28:06,548 WHAT DID THEY SAY? 692 00:28:07,784 --> 00:28:10,486 THEY HAVE TAKEN THE WRONG PISSAGE. 693 00:28:10,488 --> 00:28:14,056 I'M AFRAID THERE HAS BEEN AN ALMIGHTY KICK-UP. 694 00:28:14,058 --> 00:28:16,692 YOU TOOK THE WEEDS RIGHT OUT OF MY MOOTH. 695 00:28:17,828 --> 00:28:20,262 ( theme music playing )