ÿþ1 00:00:00,300 --> 00:00:03,580 Now, you were an MP before you were convicted of having sex 2 00:00:03,580 --> 00:00:05,571 with an under-aged girl, 3 00:00:05,660 --> 00:00:08,333 you were disgraced and went to prison for two years. 4 00:00:08,420 --> 00:00:11,139 It was a... desperate, desperate time. 5 00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:14,530 In prison you found God and you wrote Emerging From The Dark. 6 00:00:14,620 --> 00:00:18,613 But now you're saying that that trial, the sentence, finding God, 7 00:00:18,700 --> 00:00:20,620 everything was a bunch of lies, 8 00:00:20,620 --> 00:00:23,692 an elaborate scam just to get you back into the media spotlight. 9 00:00:23,780 --> 00:00:26,578 There was no cocaine, no girl at my penthouse flat, 10 00:00:26,660 --> 00:00:31,370 no under-age sex. It was all engineered to sell my first book. 11 00:00:31,460 --> 00:00:34,179 Now you're saying that you've genuinely found God 12 00:00:34,260 --> 00:00:37,252 and you're putting the record straight in Into Light. 13 00:00:37,340 --> 00:00:41,777 Absolutely. I am mortified that I allowed myself to be cajoled 14 00:00:41,860 --> 00:00:44,220 into that first pernicious scenario 15 00:00:44,220 --> 00:00:48,293 and I now feel it's my Christian duty to finally tell the truth. 16 00:00:48,380 --> 00:00:51,338 Well, I have to say, it is obvious from this second book 17 00:00:51,420 --> 00:00:53,854 that someone engineered that sex scam for you, 18 00:00:53,940 --> 00:00:56,613 but you don't name him. So, come on, tell us who it was. 19 00:00:56,700 --> 00:00:58,531 No, I can't. We won't tell anybody. 20 00:00:58,620 --> 00:01:00,860 Get Dawson on the phone before Max Clifford gets in. 21 00:01:00,860 --> 00:01:03,010 He won't come to us. 22 00:01:03,100 --> 00:01:05,455 We were his people before Dawsongate, 23 00:01:05,540 --> 00:01:08,620 but as soon as the pious old fart came blinking into daylight, 24 00:01:08,620 --> 00:01:10,451 he debunked to Freuds. 25 00:01:10,540 --> 00:01:14,772 Oh, God, hasn't the public had enough of Anthony "the zealot" Dawson 26 00:01:14,860 --> 00:01:18,330 and his regurgitated mumbo jumbo? 27 00:01:18,420 --> 00:01:20,740 Cat, where are the viewing figures for Ms Loos' debut 28 00:01:20,740 --> 00:01:22,412 on Footballers' Wives? 29 00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:24,820 Is that because there may be an investigation 30 00:01:24,820 --> 00:01:26,890 into your allegations about the case? 31 00:01:26,980 --> 00:01:29,540 Well, I understand the wheels are turning 32 00:01:29,620 --> 00:01:32,578 and it is my hope that a proper judicial procedure 33 00:01:32,660 --> 00:01:35,732 would be a chance for this person to repent, as I've done. 34 00:01:35,820 --> 00:01:38,334 Do you really think that's likely? 35 00:01:38,420 --> 00:01:40,420 In the land of the fatuous fraudster, 36 00:01:40,420 --> 00:01:42,536 the biggest two-eyed lying git is king, eh? 37 00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:45,817 Charles, there are three gentlemen downstairs to see you. 38 00:01:45,900 --> 00:01:49,859 I think you'll find in my organiser it says I'm having dinner with Cat Deeley. 39 00:01:49,940 --> 00:01:52,500 Or Tess Daly - one of the blonde sticks, anyway. 40 00:01:52,580 --> 00:01:54,172 They said it was official. 41 00:01:54,260 --> 00:01:56,410 ...see the error, as you have done? 42 00:01:56,500 --> 00:01:59,776 Well, as this person so succinctly put it to me at the time, 43 00:01:59,860 --> 00:02:03,011 "Confess, confess, confess, don the sackcloth and ashes 44 00:02:03,100 --> 00:02:07,093 "and always remember, everyone loves a grovelling proselyte." 45 00:02:07,180 --> 00:02:08,659 But hang on, you're saying... 46 00:02:14,540 --> 00:02:15,859 Oh, shit. 47 00:02:21,820 --> 00:02:26,018 This farrago is a grotesque attempt by Dawson 48 00:02:26,100 --> 00:02:30,298 to gain publicity for his latest fifth-rate outpouring. 49 00:02:30,380 --> 00:02:35,818 I can assure you, Martin, that I am wholly innocent of all charges. 50 00:02:35,900 --> 00:02:40,018 Well, that's a relief, not that I thought for a moment that, um... 51 00:02:40,100 --> 00:02:42,978 Have we got a clear strategy, Helena? 52 00:02:43,060 --> 00:02:44,539 Why did you hire me, Martin? 53 00:02:44,620 --> 00:02:46,975 Cos you were the most expensive QC he found. 54 00:02:47,060 --> 00:02:52,373 And with that outstanding financial outlay comes an outstanding barrister. 55 00:02:52,460 --> 00:02:56,089 Look, everybody knows that Anthony Dawson is a serial liar, 56 00:02:56,180 --> 00:02:59,252 whereas Charles... 57 00:02:59,340 --> 00:03:02,855 Well, Charles is, um... 58 00:03:05,740 --> 00:03:08,698 An acknowledged master of presentation. Exactly. 59 00:03:08,780 --> 00:03:11,580 Which means that if I had been responsible 60 00:03:11,580 --> 00:03:14,140 for orchestrating this inept burlesque, 61 00:03:14,220 --> 00:03:16,940 I should at least gone for someone high profile in the role 62 00:03:16,940 --> 00:03:18,578 of deflowered schoolgirl - 63 00:03:18,660 --> 00:03:22,255 someone like Charlotte Church or a member of Tatu. 64 00:03:22,340 --> 00:03:25,340 Surely we simply say that he feigned discovering God 65 00:03:25,340 --> 00:03:27,729 in order to sell his first diffusion 66 00:03:27,820 --> 00:03:31,608 and now he's claiming actually to have found him to sell his second. 67 00:03:31,700 --> 00:03:33,611 Samantha? What's the update on Besty? 68 00:03:33,700 --> 00:03:36,737 When will he be back on the cheese and wine circuit? 69 00:03:36,820 --> 00:03:41,689 Charles, Helena is costing precisely £535.68 an hour before VAT, 70 00:03:41,780 --> 00:03:44,738 I think the least we can do is to pay attention. 71 00:03:44,820 --> 00:03:46,500 Oh, I'm sorry, Helena, 72 00:03:46,500 --> 00:03:49,219 I didn't realise QC's needed people to listen in order to talk. 73 00:03:49,300 --> 00:03:51,052 I'll call you back, Samantha. 74 00:03:53,180 --> 00:03:56,331 What's Dawson likely to turn up in at court? 75 00:03:56,420 --> 00:03:58,456 A limo sponsored by the God squad. 76 00:03:58,540 --> 00:04:01,134 Then we get Charles into something humbler. 77 00:04:01,220 --> 00:04:05,099 Also we need off-the-peg suits, keep him away from Jermyn Street. 78 00:04:05,180 --> 00:04:07,057 Shoes... Have you done this before? 79 00:04:07,140 --> 00:04:08,700 John Leslie. 80 00:04:08,700 --> 00:04:11,214 It might be an idea to downgrade Charles' living quarters, 81 00:04:11,300 --> 00:04:14,220 doss him down in a pokey flat in a really crappy suburb. 82 00:04:14,220 --> 00:04:15,209 Like where? 83 00:04:15,300 --> 00:04:18,337 I was thinking... Deptford. 84 00:04:21,380 --> 00:04:22,574 What? 85 00:04:22,700 --> 00:04:25,134 The press will be gathering here where, 86 00:04:25,220 --> 00:04:28,656 in an hour or so, the trial of Charles Prentiss gets under way. 87 00:04:28,740 --> 00:04:32,494 Among prosecution witnesses expected to give evidence is Anthony Dawson 88 00:04:32,580 --> 00:04:34,730 and there's particular press interest 89 00:04:34,820 --> 00:04:38,416 because many people believe public relations is on trial here today. 90 00:04:38,500 --> 00:04:42,175 They'll be ducking PRs in the Thames by the week's end, mark my words. 91 00:04:43,260 --> 00:04:45,410 MACHINE: <i>You have 12 new messages.</i> 92 00:04:45,500 --> 00:04:48,173 PIERS: <i>Hi, Martin, Piers.</i> <i>Not trying to pre-empt anything,</i> 93 00:04:48,260 --> 00:04:50,340 <i>but if Charles does go down,</i> 94 00:04:50,340 --> 00:04:52,570 <i>you're going to be looking</i> <i>for a replacement...</i> 95 00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:54,580 ALISTAIR: <i>It's Alistair, Martin.</i> 96 00:04:54,580 --> 00:04:57,140 <i>Terrible business with Charles,</i> <i>but, if you play with fire...</i> 97 00:04:57,220 --> 00:04:59,180 <i>When you're casting around for fresh...</i> 98 00:04:59,180 --> 00:05:01,091 ANDREW: <i>Andrew Neil here...</i> Shit! 99 00:05:01,460 --> 00:05:03,769 God, his bloody chair's barely cold! 100 00:05:03,860 --> 00:05:08,376 The king is dying, long live the successful early applicant. 101 00:05:08,460 --> 00:05:11,213 Charles wants me to handle Matt Goss's next comeback. 102 00:05:11,300 --> 00:05:14,610 Working title, Shit or Bust. What did he palm off on you? 103 00:05:14,700 --> 00:05:18,420 Promoting Babs Windsor's new book, Gangsters What I Knowed 104 00:05:18,420 --> 00:05:20,058 and Hugh Grant. 105 00:05:20,140 --> 00:05:21,289 Charles gave you Hugh? 106 00:05:21,380 --> 00:05:24,690 CHARLES: If dear Kerry McFadden ever calls again wanting a little chat, 107 00:05:24,780 --> 00:05:27,578 don't, under any circumstances, put her through. 108 00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:29,580 Is that understood? They run on batteries. 109 00:05:29,580 --> 00:05:30,580 Sorry. 110 00:05:30,580 --> 00:05:33,811 Don't say you're sorry, Cat, saying sorry is a sign of weakness. 111 00:05:33,900 --> 00:05:37,210 Show weakness and they'll be on you like rapacious panthers. 112 00:05:37,300 --> 00:05:38,300 I just thought... 113 00:05:38,300 --> 00:05:41,133 What you thought is of absolutely no interest to me. 114 00:05:41,220 --> 00:05:43,814 We have two and a half minutes. Got your assignments? 115 00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:45,380 Watches are synchronised. 116 00:05:45,380 --> 00:05:48,929 Good, I want almost uninterrupted contact via phone and text. 117 00:05:49,020 --> 00:05:51,460 I believe you have four assignments, Jamie. 118 00:05:51,460 --> 00:05:53,849 I trust that won't overtax you unduly. 119 00:05:53,940 --> 00:05:56,249 Alison, you have two. Same concern. 120 00:05:56,340 --> 00:05:58,137 Where's Martin? MARTIN: Car's here. 121 00:05:58,220 --> 00:06:00,051 Right, let us be off. 122 00:06:00,140 --> 00:06:05,260 Martin, you know we're all praying for Charles' safe return to this office, 123 00:06:05,340 --> 00:06:08,900 and I have absolutely no doubt that he'll come out smelling of roses 124 00:06:08,900 --> 00:06:10,856 but, should things go tits up... 125 00:06:10,940 --> 00:06:13,374 Et tu, Jamie? 126 00:06:18,460 --> 00:06:20,815 Good luck, Charles. 127 00:06:20,900 --> 00:06:22,777 Not that you need it 128 00:06:22,860 --> 00:06:26,819 Don't worry, I shall be back in the saddle by this time next week. 129 00:06:26,900 --> 00:06:30,220 Meanwhile, don't let standards drop too far. 130 00:06:30,220 --> 00:06:31,653 We'll do our best. 131 00:06:31,740 --> 00:06:34,334 With me out, you'll have to do better than that. 132 00:06:34,420 --> 00:06:37,059 Can I just say, and I think I speak for everyone here, 133 00:06:37,140 --> 00:06:41,691 things won't be the same without you, Charles, really. You'll be sadly missed. 134 00:06:58,660 --> 00:07:02,573 Who was last in the back of this car, then? Brezhnev? 135 00:07:02,660 --> 00:07:05,015 We needed to lower your profile a little. 136 00:07:05,100 --> 00:07:08,456 We wanted to project an image which wasn't quite so grand. 137 00:07:08,540 --> 00:07:10,770 I draw the line at cycling. 138 00:07:10,860 --> 00:07:13,540 Well, we're agreed you're to have absolutely no contact 139 00:07:13,540 --> 00:07:15,690 with the media, yes? 140 00:07:15,780 --> 00:07:19,136 What, not even a snatched denial for GMTV on the courtroom steps? 141 00:07:19,220 --> 00:07:21,415 No, retain an injured detachment. 142 00:07:21,500 --> 00:07:23,331 You are hurt by the accusations. 143 00:07:23,420 --> 00:07:26,332 But absolutely determined to put the record straight. 144 00:07:26,420 --> 00:07:31,778 Whatever you two say. I'm merely an awestruck observer. Oh, hell. 145 00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:35,934 (REPORTERS CLAMOUR) 146 00:07:39,140 --> 00:07:42,894 Mother, I thought I told you not to come. 147 00:07:42,980 --> 00:07:46,689 This is no place for the terminally ill. 148 00:07:51,020 --> 00:07:54,979 What we intend to show is that not only did Charles Prentiss 149 00:07:55,060 --> 00:07:58,097 take advantage of a desperate man, 150 00:07:58,180 --> 00:08:02,571 giving him a leading role in this wretched drama, 151 00:08:02,660 --> 00:08:07,370 but that he also hired and rehearsed the other players, 152 00:08:07,460 --> 00:08:10,532 paying handsomely for their acquiescence and silence. 153 00:08:10,620 --> 00:08:16,138 This is a man who will stop at nothing 154 00:08:16,220 --> 00:08:20,179 in his manipulation of the media machine. 155 00:08:20,260 --> 00:08:24,094 "It's a toothless onslaught from Sir Jeremy Pike..." 156 00:08:24,180 --> 00:08:25,460 What are you doing? 157 00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:27,371 Dictating Charles' column to the Express. 158 00:08:27,460 --> 00:08:30,099 Five minutes, Damien. 159 00:08:30,180 --> 00:08:31,818 Dinner date with Hugh sorted? 160 00:08:31,900 --> 00:08:35,017 A quiet one-to-one just to get to know each other, obviously. 161 00:08:35,100 --> 00:08:38,536 First up on the agenda, get him the lead in Richard Curtis' new film. 162 00:08:38,620 --> 00:08:39,940 Still confident you can handle it? 163 00:08:39,940 --> 00:08:41,259 Yeah. Great. 164 00:08:41,340 --> 00:08:43,580 I mean, if anyone can deal 165 00:08:43,580 --> 00:08:45,969 with a world famous, multi-millionaire playboy, it's you. 166 00:08:46,060 --> 00:08:49,257 I don't think he'll be interested in me. 167 00:08:49,340 --> 00:08:51,660 Oh... just make sure you don't wear that green number 168 00:08:51,660 --> 00:08:53,491 you had on two weeks ago, 169 00:08:53,580 --> 00:08:57,539 otherwise we'll never see you again. You'll do a great job. 170 00:08:59,660 --> 00:09:02,094 (REPORTERS YELL) 171 00:09:06,580 --> 00:09:08,935 Five and a half hours of vitriolic spite! 172 00:09:09,020 --> 00:09:11,375 Is that a record for an opening statement? 173 00:09:11,460 --> 00:09:14,060 It is a little excessive for a perjury case, 174 00:09:14,060 --> 00:09:16,290 though Archer's took two and a half days. 175 00:09:16,380 --> 00:09:19,019 Where are we going? The flat's in Deptford. 176 00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:21,250 Where?! It's the new Peckham. 177 00:09:21,340 --> 00:09:24,377 Wasn't Peckham the new Hoxton a few years ago? 178 00:09:24,460 --> 00:09:26,212 Sadly, it's now the old Streatham. 179 00:09:26,300 --> 00:09:27,972 Which makes Deptford what? 180 00:09:28,060 --> 00:09:31,052 About an hour's taxi drive. You can drop me at the Garrick. 181 00:09:36,180 --> 00:09:37,700 Are we still in London? 182 00:09:37,700 --> 00:09:39,531 How the hell did they know we'd be here? 183 00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:42,060 Some careless insubordinate 184 00:09:42,060 --> 00:09:45,018 must have inadvertently posted the address on the internet. 185 00:09:52,100 --> 00:09:55,420 Gentlemen, please, I am under strict instructions 186 00:09:55,420 --> 00:09:58,651 to say nothing whatever at this time. 187 00:09:58,740 --> 00:10:02,699 However, suffice to say I am entirely innocent of all charges 188 00:10:02,780 --> 00:10:05,453 and have complete faith in the British legal system. 189 00:10:05,540 --> 00:10:10,170 I feel nothing but pity for my adversary, Mr Anthony Dawson, 190 00:10:10,260 --> 00:10:14,572 who is patently in need of urgent professional assistance. 191 00:10:14,660 --> 00:10:17,780 Now, I humbly beg that you will respect my privacy 192 00:10:17,780 --> 00:10:20,055 at this very difficult time for me. 193 00:10:20,140 --> 00:10:25,737 So, in the words of the great Boris Johnson, hop it and bog off. 194 00:10:25,820 --> 00:10:28,700 It's just a crash pad, really, somewhere to grab a few hours 195 00:10:28,700 --> 00:10:30,418 between clubbing and work. 196 00:10:34,540 --> 00:10:39,978 There's a corner shop to the right and a great kebab place next door. 197 00:10:40,060 --> 00:10:41,812 There's a bus route into town... 198 00:10:41,900 --> 00:10:44,698 We've all died and gone to our own particular hell. 199 00:10:44,780 --> 00:10:48,136 MARTIN: You assured us it was homely and spacious. 200 00:10:48,220 --> 00:10:51,690 Yes, and while we're on the subject of ghastly misrepresentations, 201 00:10:51,780 --> 00:10:54,374 can someone have a word with the courtroom artist? 202 00:10:54,460 --> 00:10:56,820 The drawing that appeared of me on the news 203 00:10:56,820 --> 00:10:58,856 made me look like a dyspeptic Mr Punch. 204 00:11:01,100 --> 00:11:04,012 WOMAN: Mr Prentiss, could you not answer some questions? 205 00:11:04,100 --> 00:11:08,298 Ah, well... as long as the full horror of my lowly existence here 206 00:11:08,380 --> 00:11:11,736 is faithfully recorded, I suppose it's worthwhile. 207 00:11:11,820 --> 00:11:14,778 Can someone arrange for a delivery of pizzas twice a day? 208 00:11:14,860 --> 00:11:17,579 I hope you'll be relatively comfortable here, Charles. 209 00:11:17,660 --> 00:11:21,448 Well, let's not pin everything to hope, eh? Let's push for ideals. 210 00:11:21,540 --> 00:11:25,215 A few suitable additions, I think this could be almost habitable. 211 00:11:30,300 --> 00:11:32,740 You don't believe this trial will have any adverse affect 212 00:11:32,740 --> 00:11:34,492 on your profession? 213 00:11:34,580 --> 00:11:36,740 Well, of course, Kirsty, 214 00:11:36,740 --> 00:11:39,700 as you know, I can't talk about any specific case 215 00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:43,375 but I think, for the sake of argument, 216 00:11:43,460 --> 00:11:46,500 if we take an entirely hypothetical situation 217 00:11:46,500 --> 00:11:49,492 where a serial liar makes outlandish accusations 218 00:11:49,580 --> 00:11:52,617 against a perfectly respectable professional man, 219 00:11:52,700 --> 00:11:55,373 then I think it behoves us to examine 220 00:11:55,460 --> 00:11:59,419 the testimony of this serial liar quite scrupulously 221 00:11:59,500 --> 00:12:01,252 before we jump to any conclusions. 222 00:12:01,340 --> 00:12:05,777 I think that once we begin to question this rather flimsy evidence... 223 00:12:05,860 --> 00:12:08,818 Well, I think we shall find ourselves, broadly speaking, 224 00:12:08,900 --> 00:12:11,460 looking with far more sympathy 225 00:12:11,540 --> 00:12:15,374 on this conceivably very badly wronged professional man 226 00:12:15,460 --> 00:12:17,974 and his certainly entirely innocent company. 227 00:12:18,060 --> 00:12:22,099 Er... in this, er... 228 00:12:22,180 --> 00:12:27,049 purely hypothetical and indeed non-existent case. 229 00:12:34,980 --> 00:12:36,620 <i>First message.</i> 230 00:12:36,620 --> 00:12:38,531 JEFFREY: <i>Martin, Jeffrey.</i> <i>Send all my very best to Charles.</i> 231 00:12:38,620 --> 00:12:40,850 <i>Been there,</i> <i>got the T-shirt and all that.</i> 232 00:12:40,940 --> 00:12:43,020 <i>Chances are that he is buggered,</i> 233 00:12:43,020 --> 00:12:45,773 <i>so I thought I'd test the water</i> <i>regarding his position.</i> 234 00:12:45,860 --> 00:12:48,055 Predacious vultures. 235 00:12:52,260 --> 00:12:55,889 Good morning, Jamie, Cat, Alison, Nick, Charles. 236 00:12:55,980 --> 00:12:57,698 CHARLES: Traffic bad this morning, Martin? 237 00:12:57,780 --> 00:12:59,780 Some of us have been sitting here twiddling our thumbs 238 00:12:59,780 --> 00:13:01,213 for nearly 15 minutes. 239 00:13:01,300 --> 00:13:03,052 MARTIN: Yes, got up late, rushed here, 240 00:13:03,140 --> 00:13:06,257 I didn't even have a chance to have any... breakfast. 241 00:13:06,340 --> 00:13:09,776 Well, now the whole team's assembled, let's press on, shall we? 242 00:13:09,860 --> 00:13:11,976 Some of us have a court hearing to attend. 243 00:13:22,140 --> 00:13:24,813 CHARLES: Number one, call Richard Curtis 244 00:13:24,900 --> 00:13:28,495 and secure Hugh's part before the dinner. 245 00:13:28,580 --> 00:13:31,300 It's always good to arrive at a meeting with something 246 00:13:31,300 --> 00:13:33,256 to slap triumphantly on the table. 247 00:13:33,340 --> 00:13:35,180 Do you want me to mention... 248 00:13:35,180 --> 00:13:37,899 Look, if you're gonna speak too, it'll take a lot longer. 249 00:13:37,980 --> 00:13:40,972 Dresswise, don't stint on the flesh. 250 00:13:41,060 --> 00:13:44,450 Check in the mirror and if you look like a cheap street-walker, 251 00:13:44,540 --> 00:13:46,735 then you're in the right ball park with Hugh. 252 00:13:46,820 --> 00:13:51,211 That little green number you wore the other week should be perfect. Ow! 253 00:13:51,300 --> 00:13:53,939 Oh! Sorry. 254 00:13:54,020 --> 00:13:58,730 Charles Prentiss assured me that he could rehabilitate my public image. 255 00:13:58,820 --> 00:14:02,940 He saw it as a challenge, likening it to restoring Hitler's reputation 256 00:14:02,940 --> 00:14:05,454 in Poland or Barrymore's at ITV. 257 00:14:06,540 --> 00:14:10,738 I wonder you expect us to believe anything you say, Mr Dawson. 258 00:14:10,820 --> 00:14:12,651 I take exception to that. 259 00:14:12,740 --> 00:14:18,053 Your life has been a catalogue of half-truths and lies, has it not? 260 00:14:18,140 --> 00:14:23,089 You claim that you served in both the Falkland and Gulf wars 261 00:14:23,180 --> 00:14:25,569 and you were among the wounded at Bluff Cove. 262 00:14:25,660 --> 00:14:27,810 I did serve and was wounded. 263 00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:31,336 You were in the catering corps for both conflicts, were you not? 264 00:14:31,420 --> 00:14:34,298 And the wound you received was in fact caused 265 00:14:34,380 --> 00:14:38,737 by a particularly stubborn pressure-cooker lid, wasn't it? 266 00:14:38,820 --> 00:14:42,893 The fact is, Mr Dawson, you never told the whole truth in your life. 267 00:14:42,980 --> 00:14:44,652 And you're not telling it now. 268 00:14:44,740 --> 00:14:48,733 I suggest that the person who should be under scrutiny here is Mr Dawson 269 00:14:48,820 --> 00:14:53,655 and not Charles Prentiss, who is simply an innocent victim 270 00:14:53,740 --> 00:14:57,335 of the Walter Mitty-like imaginings of the man in the witness box. 271 00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:01,580 Well, this is all pretty damning stuff, 272 00:15:01,580 --> 00:15:04,333 and I have to say that it's something which I, 273 00:15:04,420 --> 00:15:07,776 as prosecuting counsel, would have to take very seriously indeed, 274 00:15:07,860 --> 00:15:11,170 were it not for the tape 275 00:15:11,260 --> 00:15:14,457 recorded on that night four years ago, 276 00:15:14,540 --> 00:15:17,498 in the Groucho Club, where Miss... 277 00:15:17,580 --> 00:15:21,095 Billie Piper, a minor pop sensation, 278 00:15:21,180 --> 00:15:25,890 was conducting an interview at a neighbouring table. 279 00:15:25,980 --> 00:15:29,495 Objection. This evidence has not been admitted. 280 00:15:29,580 --> 00:15:32,180 The tape only came to light late last night 281 00:15:32,180 --> 00:15:34,694 and was admitted by the judge early this morning. 282 00:15:34,780 --> 00:15:39,296 In between the inane questions, we can hear quite clearly 283 00:15:39,380 --> 00:15:44,613 the voices of Charles Prentiss and Anthony Dawson. 284 00:15:44,700 --> 00:15:50,855 We've had an expert enhance the tape, leaving us with this. 285 00:15:50,940 --> 00:15:53,140 CHARLES ON TAPE: <i>Don't be</i> <i>such a dribbling wimp, Tony.</i> 286 00:15:53,140 --> 00:15:56,291 <i>A few months in choky will</i> <i>give you time to write your opus.</i> 287 00:15:56,380 --> 00:15:58,735 TONY: <i>But does it have</i> <i>to be teenage sex?</i> 288 00:15:58,820 --> 00:16:01,740 WOMAN: <i>Well, you know, I've had</i> <i>a few guys try and hit on me,</i> 289 00:16:01,740 --> 00:16:03,332 <i>but they're all sad old farts.</i> 290 00:16:03,420 --> 00:16:05,820 CHARLES: <i>What better springboard</i> <i>for total redemption</i> 291 00:16:05,820 --> 00:16:08,653 <i>than to have plumbed</i> <i>the depths of sexual depravity?</i> 292 00:16:08,740 --> 00:16:10,860 TONY: <i>Yes, but what</i> <i>if someone rumbles us?</i> 293 00:16:10,860 --> 00:16:12,771 CHARLES: <i>Who's going to rumble us?</i> 294 00:16:12,860 --> 00:16:19,379 <i>The woefully inept police force or...</i> <i>or the creaking, geriatric legal system?!</i> 295 00:16:19,460 --> 00:16:21,980 WOMAN: <i>It's true, I go for boys</i> <i>who are just nice.</i> 296 00:16:21,980 --> 00:16:24,448 <i>They don't have</i> <i>to have pots of money or anything.</i> 297 00:16:24,540 --> 00:16:27,896 CHARLES: <i>We stick together</i> <i>and no-one will be any the wiser.</i> 298 00:16:27,980 --> 00:16:32,178 <i>Lf, however, you do vomit forth</i> <i>in a moment of drunken catharsis,</i> 299 00:16:32,260 --> 00:16:36,094 <i>I'll deny everything and you,</i> <i>my friend, will plummet alone.</i> 300 00:16:36,180 --> 00:16:39,740 <i>I may enjoy dancing on the edge</i> <i>of the abyss,</i> 301 00:16:39,740 --> 00:16:42,538 <i>but I will never,</i> <i>ever topple in, comprende?</i> 302 00:16:45,340 --> 00:16:47,780 Well, it rather looks as if our hero 303 00:16:47,780 --> 00:16:50,453 has gone and landed himself squarely in the poo. 304 00:16:50,540 --> 00:16:53,213 I can't believe you lied to us. It's unforgivable. 305 00:16:53,300 --> 00:16:56,770 One always lies to one's defence, it's the one place it's expected. 306 00:16:56,860 --> 00:16:59,420 What about me? I even went on TV and stuck up for you. 307 00:16:59,500 --> 00:17:01,855 I even lied to Kirsty Wark, for God's sake! 308 00:17:01,940 --> 00:17:06,172 What we need now is a complete overhaul. 309 00:17:06,260 --> 00:17:09,300 I suggest we start with a change in personnel. 310 00:17:09,300 --> 00:17:12,610 So, thank you, Helena, your services are no longer required. 311 00:17:12,700 --> 00:17:15,294 What? You're sacked. 312 00:17:15,380 --> 00:17:19,214 Watching this case so far has been like watching a pack of whores 313 00:17:19,300 --> 00:17:21,495 and their punters circling before an orgy. 314 00:17:21,580 --> 00:17:24,253 One wishes they'd drop their pants and get on with it. 315 00:17:24,340 --> 00:17:28,219 What we need now is a bit of cut and thrust, hmm? 316 00:17:35,140 --> 00:17:36,540 Give him one from me, eh? 317 00:17:36,540 --> 00:17:38,770 JAMIE: I hope you booked somewhere classy. 318 00:17:38,860 --> 00:17:40,220 Sketch, of course. Of course. 319 00:17:40,220 --> 00:17:44,293 And... I'm running late. Did you talk to Richard Curtis? 320 00:17:44,380 --> 00:17:47,975 Actually, I couldn't get him. Have you checked Pop Bitch recently? 321 00:17:48,060 --> 00:17:51,655 No, I keep in touch with clients via the telephone, Jamie. 322 00:17:51,740 --> 00:17:55,255 Then you won't know the buzz-words regarding his latest film 323 00:17:55,340 --> 00:17:58,889 are authentic, credible and, most worrying of all, gritty. 324 00:17:58,980 --> 00:18:03,212 He's casting unknowns, so no roles for Martine, Emma, Alan or Liam. 325 00:18:03,300 --> 00:18:08,977 Certainly no role for Hugh. I'm more than happy to go and meet him. 326 00:18:09,060 --> 00:18:11,494 First meeting, prestigious client. 327 00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:16,979 Charles gave me this responsibility and I intend to carry it out. 328 00:18:24,060 --> 00:18:26,858 Hugh, slight change of plan. 329 00:18:35,820 --> 00:18:37,340 There was a time 330 00:18:37,340 --> 00:18:40,377 when people stood four square behind their fabrications. 331 00:18:40,460 --> 00:18:43,975 Now the age of public redemption is upon us, 332 00:18:44,060 --> 00:18:48,690 it's people like me, honest liars, who get caught in the crossfire. 333 00:18:48,780 --> 00:18:51,453 I don't know how you can be so calm about all this. 334 00:18:51,540 --> 00:18:53,740 Well, even on the Titanic 335 00:18:53,740 --> 00:18:56,334 the house band played on and cocktails were served. 336 00:18:56,420 --> 00:18:59,300 Not when the ship was vertical and plunging into the bloody depths, 337 00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:00,740 they weren't. 338 00:19:00,740 --> 00:19:02,890 Maybe we should play the ill-health card. 339 00:19:02,980 --> 00:19:05,860 I read that the right amount of pure adrenaline 340 00:19:05,860 --> 00:19:08,693 injected directly into the heart can cause a seizure. 341 00:19:08,780 --> 00:19:10,259 It might be worth a try. 342 00:19:10,340 --> 00:19:14,128 Ignominy or possible death. Which would you choose? 343 00:19:14,220 --> 00:19:18,372 Either way, Prentiss McCabe is up shit creek sans paddle. 344 00:19:18,460 --> 00:19:23,409 Perhaps it's time for Mother finally to shuffle off this mortal coil. 345 00:19:23,500 --> 00:19:25,889 That could buy us a few days. 346 00:19:25,980 --> 00:19:28,096 Perhaps not. 347 00:19:43,700 --> 00:19:46,772 Come on, spill the beans, tell all. 348 00:19:46,860 --> 00:19:48,532 Er... he stood me up. 349 00:19:48,620 --> 00:19:50,060 You're joking! 350 00:19:50,060 --> 00:19:52,369 No, he didn't show, and now I can't get hold of him. 351 00:19:52,460 --> 00:19:55,975 Hmm, bloody movie star tossers, you can't trust any of them. 352 00:19:56,060 --> 00:19:58,813 It's Charles, he wants you in the round room. 353 00:20:11,780 --> 00:20:15,898 Oh, hello, is, er... is Piers there, please? 354 00:20:15,980 --> 00:20:19,450 It's Martin, Martin McCabe. 355 00:20:19,540 --> 00:20:21,258 Piers! 356 00:20:21,340 --> 00:20:24,889 You're asking me to commit perjury in a perjury trial? 357 00:20:24,980 --> 00:20:26,971 The first time is always the hardest. 358 00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:32,453 Clear this little hurdle and your career in PR will blossom. 359 00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:34,178 No... 360 00:20:34,260 --> 00:20:38,378 God knows I've got no right to ask this of you 361 00:20:38,460 --> 00:20:40,780 but I believe this is one of those times 362 00:20:40,780 --> 00:20:43,294 when we've got to put aside our selfish personal qualms 363 00:20:43,380 --> 00:20:45,018 and think of the little people. 364 00:20:45,100 --> 00:20:48,217 I shudder to think of the career prospects 365 00:20:48,300 --> 00:20:51,975 of someone like Nick or Cat if this company folds. 366 00:20:54,140 --> 00:20:57,132 MAN: How would you describe Mr Charles Prentiss? 367 00:20:58,740 --> 00:21:03,973 Er, um... it's something about him being inspiring and exhilarating. 368 00:21:04,060 --> 00:21:06,290 "He's a supportive and generous boss who..." 369 00:21:06,380 --> 00:21:09,053 I would describe as a friend. As a valued colleague. 370 00:21:09,140 --> 00:21:11,940 "Would you say he's been duplicitous in his dealings?" 371 00:21:11,940 --> 00:21:15,012 No, no, um... 372 00:21:15,100 --> 00:21:18,410 He is... inspiring and exhilarating. 373 00:21:18,500 --> 00:21:21,333 Inspiring and exhilarating was his work methods, 374 00:21:21,420 --> 00:21:26,540 this is..."He deals honestly and truthfully with staff and clients." 375 00:21:26,620 --> 00:21:30,738 It's not going in. It's only the tenth time, stay with it. 376 00:21:30,820 --> 00:21:32,780 "Where was he when Mr Dawson alleges 377 00:21:32,780 --> 00:21:35,135 "Mr Prentiss was at the Groucho Club in London?" 378 00:21:35,220 --> 00:21:39,100 Ah, um... yes, we were in a hotel in Ayrshire. 379 00:21:39,100 --> 00:21:40,055 Argyllshire. 380 00:21:40,140 --> 00:21:42,449 Having a weekend away. On a business trip. 381 00:21:42,540 --> 00:21:44,212 I can't do it. 382 00:21:44,300 --> 00:21:46,097 I can't... do it. 383 00:21:46,180 --> 00:21:48,136 I can't lie, I can't. 384 00:21:53,220 --> 00:21:55,176 CHARLES: Miss Jackman, 385 00:21:55,260 --> 00:22:00,095 as an employee of Prentiss McCabe, you are in a unique position 386 00:22:00,180 --> 00:22:02,340 to witness Mr Prentiss 387 00:22:02,340 --> 00:22:04,410 both at work and at play. 388 00:22:04,500 --> 00:22:05,979 He has always treated me well. 389 00:22:06,060 --> 00:22:09,575 He is a supportive and generous boss who I'd describe as a friend. 390 00:22:09,660 --> 00:22:13,050 No, as a... valued colleague. 391 00:22:13,140 --> 00:22:17,531 That cleverly answers my first question. 392 00:22:17,620 --> 00:22:19,133 Would you say he's ever... 393 00:22:19,220 --> 00:22:20,500 Duplicitous? Never. 394 00:22:20,500 --> 00:22:23,540 He always deals honestly and truthfully 395 00:22:23,540 --> 00:22:25,337 with both staff and clients. 396 00:22:25,420 --> 00:22:28,412 He'd no sooner lie than I would, and I would never lie, ever. 397 00:22:28,500 --> 00:22:32,095 And anyway, the night that he was alleged to have been at the Groucho 398 00:22:32,180 --> 00:22:36,651 with Mr Dawson, we, he and I, were in a hotel in Argyllshire... 399 00:22:36,740 --> 00:22:39,493 on a strictly business trip. 400 00:22:39,580 --> 00:22:41,616 Separate rooms and everything. 401 00:22:41,700 --> 00:22:43,975 Really? 402 00:22:44,060 --> 00:22:45,891 I even have the receipts. 403 00:22:45,980 --> 00:22:49,177 This would appear to throw a new complexion over proceedings. 404 00:22:49,260 --> 00:22:54,015 However, I can tell you all what you've heard from Miss Jackman 405 00:22:54,100 --> 00:22:56,620 is the biggest crock of horse manure 406 00:22:56,620 --> 00:22:59,060 you're ever likely to hear in your entire life. 407 00:22:59,060 --> 00:23:00,015 What? 408 00:23:00,100 --> 00:23:02,330 You may stand down now, Miss Jackman. 409 00:23:07,060 --> 00:23:10,814 I was not in a hotel room in Argyllshire. 410 00:23:10,900 --> 00:23:14,575 I was in the Groucho Club with Mr Dawson. 411 00:23:14,660 --> 00:23:19,495 I said that I would prostrate myself before this court, and I will. 412 00:23:19,580 --> 00:23:24,529 Charles Prentiss, and I speak from bitter personal experience, 413 00:23:24,620 --> 00:23:27,498 is one of the most despicable, unscrupulous 414 00:23:27,580 --> 00:23:30,558 and downright dishonest people it has been my displeasure to know. 415 00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:34,998 JAMIE: Mmm, mmm... 416 00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:39,039 But, Hugh, you did go straight home after the restaurant, didn't you? 417 00:23:39,120 --> 00:23:41,918 No stop-offs on the way home? 418 00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:46,437 I'm joshing, you must get that all the time. 419 00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:49,034 Right, nothing's changed since our meal last night. 420 00:23:49,120 --> 00:23:51,111 I spoke to Curtis first thing. 421 00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:53,440 He knows we feel the part of the social worker 422 00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:56,159 is exactly the direction you should be going in. 423 00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:58,913 Well, he knows all about the early character roles. 424 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,480 Quasimodo in the Park, your Elephant Man at the Old Red Lion, 425 00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:04,596 critically acclaimed. 426 00:24:06,680 --> 00:24:08,193 Can I call you back in five? 427 00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:10,236 Excellent. 428 00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:15,671 Let's get you some chocolate. 429 00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:21,394 Miss Jackman is a person of absolute integrity, 430 00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:25,268 and yet still Charles Prentiss managed to make her 431 00:24:25,360 --> 00:24:28,796 stand before this court of law and lie through her teeth. 432 00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:31,440 Does this make her bad? 433 00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:35,035 Does it make him bad? 434 00:24:35,120 --> 00:24:38,430 Or does it make them both simply human? 435 00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:44,436 Our television schedules are crammed with perjured piers of the realm, 436 00:24:44,520 --> 00:24:47,990 drug-guzzling sportsmen and coughing majors, 437 00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,440 all of them fawned upon 438 00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:53,273 and exalted as some fabulous new form of celebrity. 439 00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,231 We all lie. 440 00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:58,993 The world would fall apart if we did not. 441 00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:02,868 "Does my bum look big in this?" "Gargantuan, my sweet." 442 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:07,317 "This is my own special recipe, how does it taste?" 443 00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:09,231 "Like viper's vomit." 444 00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:11,515 Result, pandemonium. 445 00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:17,197 Yes, Charles Prentiss has done... some terrible things. 446 00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:21,558 But he's part of a profession that is required, nay, 447 00:25:21,640 --> 00:25:25,110 demanded to be economical with the truth. 448 00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:28,112 If we're to throw a man in jail for lying, 449 00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:31,715 then shouldn't we be imprisoning politicians, 450 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:35,952 businessmen, advertisers, estate agents, journalists, 451 00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:39,077 members of the legal profession? 452 00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:41,913 What I did was wrong 453 00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:47,028 and I accept whatever sentence this court sees fit to bestow upon me 454 00:25:47,120 --> 00:25:49,999 but let us not fool ourselves into thinking that anything I did 455 00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:51,300 was not something that everyone 456 00:25:51,500 --> 00:25:54,292 is capable of doing under extreme circumstances. 457 00:25:54,380 --> 00:25:58,453 And, in the final analysis, who has been hurt? 458 00:25:58,540 --> 00:26:00,900 Certainly no under-age girl 459 00:26:00,900 --> 00:26:03,733 because the whole night in question was pure fabrication. 460 00:26:03,820 --> 00:26:09,770 Certainly not Mr Dawson, who as a result of all this has found God. 461 00:26:09,860 --> 00:26:13,409 What higher function could I have performed for a friend? 462 00:26:14,500 --> 00:26:18,459 And may I thank you for giving me the chance 463 00:26:18,540 --> 00:26:23,375 to have my own personal road to Damascus moment here in court? 464 00:26:24,500 --> 00:26:29,051 Smite me, cast me howling from this room, 465 00:26:29,140 --> 00:26:32,530 but I guarantee you I will return a better, 466 00:26:32,620 --> 00:26:35,737 perhaps sadder, wiser 467 00:26:35,820 --> 00:26:38,539 and certainly humbler man. 468 00:26:57,380 --> 00:26:59,980 After much deliberation, I have decided 469 00:26:59,980 --> 00:27:03,052 the sentence should reflect the seriousness of this offence 470 00:27:03,140 --> 00:27:06,380 and also take into account 471 00:27:06,380 --> 00:27:09,577 the stance taken by the defendant yesterday. 472 00:27:09,660 --> 00:27:13,653 On balance, I feel that the only fair course of action to take is... 473 00:27:13,740 --> 00:27:17,130 (TELEPHONE RINGS) I'm so sorry. 474 00:27:19,540 --> 00:27:22,373 Oh, it's my publisher, somewhat jumping the gun. 475 00:27:22,460 --> 00:27:24,100 Do carry on. 476 00:27:24,100 --> 00:27:25,613 Where was I? Er... 477 00:27:25,700 --> 00:27:28,737 "You felt the only fair course of action you could take..." 478 00:27:28,820 --> 00:27:30,299 Ah, yes, thank you. 479 00:27:30,380 --> 00:27:31,740 Don't mention it. 480 00:27:31,740 --> 00:27:35,699 The only fair course of action to take is... 481 00:27:39,020 --> 00:27:42,460 It was a pretty dull meal, Ali, all "I want, I want." 482 00:27:42,460 --> 00:27:44,974 I was like, "I'll see what we can do." 483 00:27:45,060 --> 00:27:49,258 Then Jemima turns up, "She wants, she wants." Bloody nightmare. 484 00:27:49,340 --> 00:27:51,695 If you do anything like this to me again, 485 00:27:51,780 --> 00:27:55,260 I will personally remove your manhood piece by tiny piece, understand? 486 00:27:55,260 --> 00:27:56,659 Message received. 487 00:27:57,740 --> 00:28:01,050 Ladies and gentlemen, I think it would be churlish 488 00:28:01,140 --> 00:28:03,290 for us not to raise our glasses in a toast 489 00:28:03,380 --> 00:28:06,178 to the great British judicial system, 490 00:28:06,260 --> 00:28:09,297 which has proved as fair and even-handed 491 00:28:09,380 --> 00:28:11,610 as I always suspected it would. 492 00:28:11,700 --> 00:28:14,168 ALL: The great British judicial system. 493 00:28:15,260 --> 00:28:17,455 Ah, so soon. 494 00:28:17,540 --> 00:28:19,292 Well, farewell all. 495 00:28:19,380 --> 00:28:21,450 Good luck, Charles. 496 00:28:21,540 --> 00:28:22,973 Thank you. 497 00:28:24,660 --> 00:28:27,936 Oh, and, Martin, the only cake I like is Madeira. 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net