1
00:00:16,887 --> 00:00:18,843
They're creepy and they're kooky
2
00:00:18,927 --> 00:00:20,679
Mysterious and spooky
3
00:00:20,767 --> 00:00:22,564
They're altogether ooky
4
00:00:22,647 --> 00:00:24,524
The Addams family
5
00:00:24,607 --> 00:00:26,404
The house is a museum
6
00:00:26,487 --> 00:00:28,398
When people come to see 'em
7
00:00:28,487 --> 00:00:30,318
They really are a scream
8
00:00:30,407 --> 00:00:31,920
The Addams family
9
00:00:33,327 --> 00:00:34,316
Neat.
10
00:00:35,047 --> 00:00:36,036
Sweet.
11
00:00:38,847 --> 00:00:39,836
Petite.
12
00:00:39,927 --> 00:00:41,679
So get a witch's shawl on
13
00:00:41,767 --> 00:00:43,644
A broomstick you can crawl on
14
00:00:43,727 --> 00:00:45,479
We're gonna pay a call on
15
00:00:45,567 --> 00:00:48,400
The Addams family
16
00:01:09,887 --> 00:01:12,162
Tish! That sets my Spanish blood aflame.
17
00:01:12,767 --> 00:01:14,086
Bubele, please.
18
00:01:14,167 --> 00:01:16,601
Bubele.
That sets the rest of my blood aflame.
19
00:01:17,127 --> 00:01:19,687
One, two, fat go away.
20
00:01:19,767 --> 00:01:21,917
Three, four, muscles stay.
21
00:01:22,487 --> 00:01:23,966
Pugsley, darling, what are you doing?
22
00:01:24,047 --> 00:01:26,277
Exercising. She called me fatso.
23
00:01:26,487 --> 00:01:27,636
She?
24
00:01:27,727 --> 00:01:29,001
My girl, Marie.
25
00:01:29,087 --> 00:01:31,237
She said she wasn't going to go
with me anymore
26
00:01:31,327 --> 00:01:32,646
unless I got some muscles.
27
00:01:32,767 --> 00:01:35,042
Muscles? Oh, how vulgar.
28
00:01:35,127 --> 00:01:37,163
Morticia, Gomez.
29
00:01:37,967 --> 00:01:39,639
Hey, Morticia, Gomez.
30
00:01:40,007 --> 00:01:42,885
What do you know, I just got a letter
from my French pen pal, Yvette.
31
00:01:42,967 --> 00:01:44,559
- And she says...
- Uncle Fester.
32
00:01:44,647 --> 00:01:46,717
Please, dear, not now. Later.
33
00:01:46,807 --> 00:01:47,922
We have a little problem.
34
00:01:48,007 --> 00:01:49,679
We caught the boy exercising.
35
00:01:49,927 --> 00:01:51,440
Well, what's wrong with that?
36
00:01:51,647 --> 00:01:53,603
Girls like guys with V-figures.
37
00:01:54,847 --> 00:01:57,156
The only trouble is, mine's upside-down.
38
00:01:58,967 --> 00:02:00,320
Now, Pugsley, dear,
39
00:02:00,647 --> 00:02:03,161
a man's charm comes from inner strength.
40
00:02:03,487 --> 00:02:05,045
Not from outer bulges.
41
00:02:05,767 --> 00:02:06,961
Look at your father,
42
00:02:07,527 --> 00:02:09,438
did you ever see a better example
43
00:02:09,527 --> 00:02:10,960
of inner strength?
44
00:02:11,207 --> 00:02:13,437
And the whole thing
without a single push-up,
45
00:02:13,687 --> 00:02:15,757
pull-up, sit-up, sweat-up.
46
00:02:16,167 --> 00:02:17,282
The entire thing accomplished
47
00:02:17,367 --> 00:02:20,120
through the sheer glory of Zen-Yogi.
48
00:02:24,127 --> 00:02:26,595
Zen-Yogi has made your father
what he is today.
49
00:02:27,407 --> 00:02:29,921
That plus the sheer beauty of his soul.
50
00:02:32,447 --> 00:02:34,085
Darling.
51
00:02:34,247 --> 00:02:36,807
Let's have no more talk
of biceps and triceps.
52
00:02:37,487 --> 00:02:39,318
If you want to be a really attractive man,
53
00:02:39,607 --> 00:02:40,801
do as your father does.
54
00:02:41,167 --> 00:02:42,805
Okay, Mother, I'll try.
55
00:02:43,047 --> 00:02:44,321
Darling.
56
00:02:46,407 --> 00:02:47,886
Oh, just look at him.
57
00:02:48,327 --> 00:02:49,680
Gaining inner strength.
58
00:02:50,087 --> 00:02:52,078
Inner strength and a flat head.
59
00:02:53,407 --> 00:02:54,760
Fester, don't knock anything
60
00:02:54,847 --> 00:02:56,041
until you've really tried it.
61
00:02:56,127 --> 00:02:57,162
How true, darling.
62
00:02:58,407 --> 00:03:00,762
Now, Uncle Fester,
your letter from Yvette.
63
00:03:01,127 --> 00:03:02,560
Oh, forget it.
64
00:03:27,687 --> 00:03:29,325
Gomez, darling, did you hear something?
65
00:03:29,647 --> 00:03:31,046
Just a thump.
66
00:03:34,247 --> 00:03:36,238
Seems to be coming from Fester's room.
67
00:03:36,607 --> 00:03:38,006
I wonder what he's up to.
68
00:03:38,367 --> 00:03:39,800
He'll be coming through the ceiling
in a minute,
69
00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:41,081
we can ask him.
70
00:03:41,167 --> 00:03:42,759
I have a better idea.
71
00:03:45,567 --> 00:03:47,319
You rang?
72
00:03:47,847 --> 00:03:48,996
Yes, Lurch.
73
00:03:49,087 --> 00:03:51,157
Would you go upstairs
and check on Uncle Fester?
74
00:03:51,807 --> 00:03:54,241
There seems to be
a lot of thumping going on up there.
75
00:03:54,487 --> 00:03:56,284
Yes, Mrs. Addams.
76
00:04:01,967 --> 00:04:03,366
You thumped.
77
00:04:05,687 --> 00:04:07,086
Oh, Lurch.
78
00:04:07,647 --> 00:04:09,205
I'm in terrible shape.
79
00:04:10,447 --> 00:04:12,039
So I see.
80
00:04:14,287 --> 00:04:16,357
Remember my French pen pal, Yvette?
81
00:04:17,207 --> 00:04:18,879
Folies-Bergere.
82
00:04:19,327 --> 00:04:20,760
She's coming here to visit me.
83
00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:27,320
You can say that again.
84
00:04:27,407 --> 00:04:29,443
She thinks that I'm 6'3"
85
00:04:29,527 --> 00:04:31,597
and built like Cary Grant.
86
00:04:34,887 --> 00:04:36,639
Well, it's not that bad.
87
00:04:36,727 --> 00:04:38,797
I've got a couple of days to get in shape.
88
00:04:39,527 --> 00:04:42,564
But Zen-Yogi isn't gonna do it.
89
00:04:43,527 --> 00:04:44,676
Corset?
90
00:04:44,767 --> 00:04:46,644
Corset! 'Course not.
91
00:04:47,047 --> 00:04:48,036
No.
92
00:04:48,287 --> 00:04:50,243
I'm gonna go on a crash program
93
00:04:50,447 --> 00:04:52,085
of diet and exercise,
94
00:04:52,967 --> 00:04:54,195
but secret.
95
00:04:55,247 --> 00:04:56,805
- Secret?
- Yeah.
96
00:04:57,327 --> 00:05:00,239
You know how Gomez and Morticia
feel about exercise.
97
00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:01,356
They think it's silly.
98
00:05:01,967 --> 00:05:03,605
I'll have to do it early in the morning.
99
00:05:04,727 --> 00:05:08,436
Hey, I'll do it with that guy on TV,
100
00:05:08,727 --> 00:05:09,876
Jack La Lanne.
101
00:05:09,967 --> 00:05:10,956
The muscle man.
102
00:05:11,407 --> 00:05:13,125
He's on at 6:50 in the morning.
103
00:05:17,047 --> 00:05:18,639
What are you moaning about?
104
00:05:18,727 --> 00:05:20,524
I'm the one that's gotta get up
105
00:05:21,327 --> 00:05:22,806
and do it!
106
00:05:23,807 --> 00:05:25,081
One, two, three, four.
107
00:05:25,207 --> 00:05:26,845
One, two, three, four.
108
00:05:27,007 --> 00:05:30,522
Come on, ladies, hit it.
One, two, three, four. One...
109
00:05:30,687 --> 00:05:31,676
Tummies in.
110
00:05:32,487 --> 00:05:34,921
Shoulders back, squat.
111
00:05:35,087 --> 00:05:37,043
Hit it. One, two, three, four.
112
00:05:37,127 --> 00:05:40,324
One, two, three, four. Come on, one, two,
113
00:05:40,407 --> 00:05:41,840
- three, four...
- What is he doing?
114
00:05:42,287 --> 00:05:44,482
He's either dancing to The Late Late Show
115
00:05:44,567 --> 00:05:46,717
or exercising to The Early Early Show.
116
00:05:47,847 --> 00:05:49,917
One, two, three, four.
117
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:51,756
Hi.
118
00:05:52,007 --> 00:05:53,565
Isn't that Jack La Lanne,
119
00:05:53,647 --> 00:05:55,046
the physical culture fellow?
120
00:05:55,127 --> 00:05:56,845
Never heard of him.
121
00:05:59,247 --> 00:06:00,282
Gomez.
122
00:06:00,647 --> 00:06:03,241
That television set goes back
to the junk man.
123
00:06:03,527 --> 00:06:05,006
Good thinking.
124
00:06:22,567 --> 00:06:23,556
Hey.
125
00:06:24,567 --> 00:06:26,762
I can't get you on TV anymore,
126
00:06:26,847 --> 00:06:29,361
so I decided on a personal approach.
127
00:06:29,767 --> 00:06:30,995
I need help.
128
00:06:32,687 --> 00:06:35,247
You know, you said it was an emergency
and it certainly is.
129
00:06:35,567 --> 00:06:37,842
You know, I've seen
people let themselves go.
130
00:06:37,967 --> 00:06:39,366
But you're almost gone.
131
00:06:40,927 --> 00:06:42,121
Touché!
132
00:06:46,087 --> 00:06:47,236
Morticia.
133
00:06:49,847 --> 00:06:52,122
Isn't that that television fellow
with Uncle Fester?
134
00:06:52,767 --> 00:06:54,086
I do believe it is.
135
00:06:54,167 --> 00:06:57,523
That's odd having him here.
Fester's up to something.
136
00:06:57,607 --> 00:07:00,997
Darling, have you ever known Uncle Fester
to be sneaky and underhanded?
137
00:07:01,367 --> 00:07:02,766
Only when he was
up to something shady.
138
00:07:04,647 --> 00:07:05,921
Say, what do you generally eat?
139
00:07:06,447 --> 00:07:08,085
Oh, the usual thing.
140
00:07:08,567 --> 00:07:09,795
Eye of newt.
141
00:07:10,207 --> 00:07:11,526
Purée of aardvark.
142
00:07:11,607 --> 00:07:12,881
Roast yak.
143
00:07:14,047 --> 00:07:15,799
You know, they say we're what we eat.
144
00:07:17,047 --> 00:07:18,560
And, mister, you really are.
145
00:07:19,887 --> 00:07:21,878
Look, it's all in this booklet.
146
00:07:22,167 --> 00:07:23,919
This is the astronaut's guide.
147
00:07:25,167 --> 00:07:27,727
And whatever it calls for in here
goes double for you.
148
00:07:28,927 --> 00:07:29,916
Roger.
149
00:07:30,047 --> 00:07:32,561
Four, three, two, one. Blast off.
150
00:07:37,407 --> 00:07:40,479
Boy, this exercise makes you thirsty.
151
00:07:45,767 --> 00:07:48,042
Turn it off!
152
00:07:54,287 --> 00:07:55,925
Well, now.
153
00:08:00,367 --> 00:08:02,835
A little punching the bag.
154
00:08:09,647 --> 00:08:12,036
Well, I've stopped punching the bag.
155
00:08:12,127 --> 00:08:14,482
Now, what's the next exercise
in that astronaut book
156
00:08:14,567 --> 00:08:16,205
that La Lanne gave me?
157
00:08:16,287 --> 00:08:18,243
Deep knee-bends.
158
00:08:20,087 --> 00:08:21,315
Deep knee-bends.
159
00:08:21,647 --> 00:08:25,037
All right, you count.
We'll start with about 50.
160
00:08:25,967 --> 00:08:27,195
One.
161
00:08:28,367 --> 00:08:29,595
Down.
162
00:08:31,527 --> 00:08:32,755
More.
163
00:08:36,447 --> 00:08:38,438
I got down all right.
164
00:08:40,207 --> 00:08:41,959
You've got to get me up.
165
00:08:46,127 --> 00:08:47,162
Oh, boy.
166
00:08:47,247 --> 00:08:49,203
Listen to those muscles expand.
167
00:08:53,047 --> 00:08:54,036
Well.
168
00:08:54,127 --> 00:08:56,800
That's enough deep knee-bends.
What's the next exercise?
169
00:08:57,127 --> 00:08:59,083
Chest pulley.
170
00:09:00,327 --> 00:09:01,646
That will be a snap.
171
00:09:04,847 --> 00:09:06,485
Thank you.
172
00:09:11,887 --> 00:09:13,240
Must be stuck.
173
00:09:32,287 --> 00:09:34,517
Yeah. I think I got the hang of it now.
174
00:09:35,447 --> 00:09:36,562
Sure.
175
00:09:42,727 --> 00:09:45,082
Well, don't just stand there, help me.
176
00:09:54,567 --> 00:09:55,886
Now I got the idea.
177
00:09:55,967 --> 00:09:57,241
Let me have it.
178
00:10:01,367 --> 00:10:02,800
My, he was in a hurry.
179
00:10:03,607 --> 00:10:05,882
Lurch, we know we can count on you.
180
00:10:06,567 --> 00:10:07,920
What's troubling Fester?
181
00:10:10,767 --> 00:10:12,803
I think he's trying to tell us something.
182
00:10:13,607 --> 00:10:14,926
Is he in trouble?
183
00:10:16,967 --> 00:10:18,764
He's beginning to weaken.
184
00:10:19,287 --> 00:10:20,640
Is it a money matter?
185
00:10:21,927 --> 00:10:23,406
An emotional disturbance?
186
00:10:24,247 --> 00:10:25,236
A health problem?
187
00:10:26,927 --> 00:10:28,838
We're getting warm. A health problem.
188
00:10:30,207 --> 00:10:32,323
Darling, you're right. Uncle Fester's ill.
189
00:10:32,487 --> 00:10:34,079
Of course, that's it.
190
00:10:34,807 --> 00:10:36,604
It's written all over his face.
191
00:10:37,207 --> 00:10:39,084
Just had to keep probing.
192
00:10:39,407 --> 00:10:41,796
Thank you, Lurch.
Thank you for being so helpful.
193
00:10:48,047 --> 00:10:49,844
Uncle Fester, what are you doing?
194
00:10:50,327 --> 00:10:51,476
Relaxing.
195
00:10:51,607 --> 00:10:54,167
Fester, old boy. Your problem is solved.
196
00:10:54,607 --> 00:10:55,596
It is?
197
00:10:55,687 --> 00:10:57,803
Yes, we're going to have
a doctor here for you in an hour.
198
00:11:18,607 --> 00:11:20,996
- This is the Addams house?
- Yep.
199
00:11:21,327 --> 00:11:22,726
You're going in there?
200
00:11:24,007 --> 00:11:25,645
Good luck, Charlie.
201
00:11:39,967 --> 00:11:41,525
I'm Doctor Motley.
202
00:11:42,207 --> 00:11:43,799
Follow me.
203
00:11:50,647 --> 00:11:52,638
Doctor Motley.
204
00:12:00,567 --> 00:12:02,285
Just a moment, Doctor,
where are you going?
205
00:12:02,927 --> 00:12:05,157
I am going to nail up a quarantine sign.
206
00:12:05,247 --> 00:12:08,205
I can tell just by looking at you,
there's an epidemic in this house.
207
00:12:09,487 --> 00:12:12,524
Really, Doctor,
there's no need for hysterics.
208
00:12:12,687 --> 00:12:13,961
Only one of us is sick.
209
00:12:15,167 --> 00:12:17,044
- Which one?
- Uncle Fester, of course.
210
00:12:17,167 --> 00:12:18,486
Just hasn't been himself.
211
00:12:18,607 --> 00:12:19,881
Oh, I'm not sick.
212
00:12:19,967 --> 00:12:22,401
I just had
a complete physical examination.
213
00:12:23,567 --> 00:12:24,682
Blood pressure, perfect.
214
00:12:25,007 --> 00:12:25,996
Pulse, perfect.
215
00:12:26,167 --> 00:12:27,646
Reaction time, perfect.
216
00:12:28,327 --> 00:12:29,726
Liver, so-so.
217
00:12:30,127 --> 00:12:31,401
So-so?
218
00:12:31,687 --> 00:12:33,723
Well, you can't win them all.
219
00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:36,362
Who performed this examination?
220
00:12:36,687 --> 00:12:38,962
I did. It may not be perfect,
221
00:12:39,407 --> 00:12:40,681
but it saves a lot of time.
222
00:12:42,047 --> 00:12:43,560
Fester, where are you going?
223
00:12:43,647 --> 00:12:46,081
Up to my room to sharpen my scalpel.
224
00:12:46,167 --> 00:12:47,885
- Your scalpel?
- Yes.
225
00:12:47,967 --> 00:12:49,639
If my liver count keeps dropping,
226
00:12:49,767 --> 00:12:51,200
I may have to operate.
227
00:12:51,927 --> 00:12:52,996
Uncle Fester.
228
00:12:53,287 --> 00:12:55,118
As long as Doctor Motley is here,
229
00:12:55,607 --> 00:12:57,006
how about an examination?
230
00:12:57,087 --> 00:12:58,076
Oh.
231
00:12:58,287 --> 00:12:59,845
Need the practice, hey, Doc?
232
00:13:00,567 --> 00:13:02,000
If it weren't for my Hippocratic oath,
233
00:13:02,087 --> 00:13:04,647
I'd turn in my satchel.
234
00:13:18,847 --> 00:13:20,246
You see anything, Doctor?
235
00:13:20,487 --> 00:13:23,843
Yes, I see a face with pince-nez glasses.
236
00:13:25,287 --> 00:13:26,481
Fester's head?
237
00:13:26,767 --> 00:13:28,041
Either in or...
238
00:13:29,527 --> 00:13:31,199
Let's try it from another angle.
239
00:13:35,127 --> 00:13:36,765
Do you still see that face, Doctor?
240
00:13:36,847 --> 00:13:38,963
No, now I see a moose's head.
241
00:13:40,007 --> 00:13:43,283
By george, Fester always did like
to keep an open mind.
242
00:13:45,447 --> 00:13:46,436
You know what I think?
243
00:13:47,007 --> 00:13:49,157
Don't tell me you think
he has holes in his head.
244
00:13:51,447 --> 00:13:53,324
I think you all have holes in your head.
245
00:13:55,087 --> 00:13:56,679
And that includes me.
246
00:13:59,407 --> 00:14:00,886
Poor fellow.
247
00:14:00,967 --> 00:14:03,720
Those long internships do take their toll.
248
00:14:11,727 --> 00:14:13,240
Poor Uncle Fester.
249
00:14:14,247 --> 00:14:17,000
How a man can go to pieces
right before your very eyes.
250
00:14:18,407 --> 00:14:20,557
Not only did he pass up lunch and dinner,
but look at him.
251
00:14:21,367 --> 00:14:22,925
Staring at the full moon
252
00:14:23,007 --> 00:14:24,838
and doing deep knee-bends.
253
00:14:25,807 --> 00:14:27,638
Oh, dear, he is sick.
254
00:14:28,007 --> 00:14:30,237
Usually when the moon is full,
he howls at it.
255
00:14:32,127 --> 00:14:33,446
Darling.
256
00:14:33,607 --> 00:14:35,404
You don't suppose
his problem could be mental.
257
00:14:35,847 --> 00:14:36,836
Possible.
258
00:14:37,407 --> 00:14:39,284
Greater minds than his
have been known to crack.
259
00:14:40,487 --> 00:14:42,364
Remember Cousin Slump?
260
00:14:42,527 --> 00:14:44,040
Yes.
261
00:14:45,367 --> 00:14:48,040
One moment, a brilliant nuclear physicist.
262
00:14:48,487 --> 00:14:51,047
The next, he was running
around Los Alamos
263
00:14:51,247 --> 00:14:53,602
in a three-cornered hat
and a powdered wig.
264
00:14:54,327 --> 00:14:55,362
Dear.
265
00:14:55,927 --> 00:14:57,883
Darling, perhaps I should call
a psychiatrist?
266
00:14:58,247 --> 00:15:01,000
Querida, after our experience
with Dr. Motley?
267
00:15:01,447 --> 00:15:02,641
You're right.
268
00:15:03,367 --> 00:15:05,005
I'll handle this myself.
269
00:15:05,927 --> 00:15:08,646
Do you remember how much I helped you
with your sleepwalking?
270
00:15:09,607 --> 00:15:11,040
You mean to analyze him?
271
00:15:11,127 --> 00:15:13,118
We must reach his subconscious.
272
00:15:13,207 --> 00:15:15,038
Be lucky to reach his conscious.
273
00:15:15,167 --> 00:15:17,556
Darling, we have to try and help him.
274
00:15:17,647 --> 00:15:18,875
But how?
275
00:15:19,927 --> 00:15:21,326
There are ways.
276
00:15:23,127 --> 00:15:24,560
Now, Uncle Fester.
277
00:15:25,007 --> 00:15:26,565
I want you to concentrate.
278
00:15:28,367 --> 00:15:29,686
Concentrate.
279
00:15:30,567 --> 00:15:31,841
Concentrate.
280
00:15:32,367 --> 00:15:34,517
Morticia, you're just wasting your time.
281
00:15:34,927 --> 00:15:36,838
The only one that can hypnotize me
282
00:15:37,127 --> 00:15:38,526
is me. Now, watch.
283
00:15:39,647 --> 00:15:40,796
Sleep.
284
00:15:43,287 --> 00:15:45,596
Certainly doesn't waste time
on preliminaries.
285
00:15:46,727 --> 00:15:49,605
Yes, but I think we ought to make sure
he's really out.
286
00:15:50,327 --> 00:15:51,726
Test his reflexes.
287
00:15:51,807 --> 00:15:53,604
- Reflexes?
- Yeah. With a hammer, you know.
288
00:15:53,687 --> 00:15:54,722
Oh! Oh, of course.
289
00:16:02,327 --> 00:16:04,158
By george, he's really under.
290
00:16:04,607 --> 00:16:05,881
Now, Uncle Fester.
291
00:16:06,007 --> 00:16:07,838
I want you to listen very carefully.
292
00:16:09,247 --> 00:16:10,236
First question.
293
00:16:10,967 --> 00:16:13,435
You've been up to something lately,
haven't you?
294
00:16:13,527 --> 00:16:14,516
Yes.
295
00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:16,916
- Would you care to tell us about it?
- No.
296
00:16:17,447 --> 00:16:19,199
Uncle Fester. Tell us.
297
00:16:19,287 --> 00:16:21,960
What's going through
your poor tortured mind
298
00:16:22,047 --> 00:16:23,196
at this very moment?
299
00:16:23,287 --> 00:16:26,324
Four, three, two, one.
300
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:27,801
Blast off!
301
00:16:29,367 --> 00:16:30,356
So that's it.
302
00:16:31,207 --> 00:16:32,242
What's it?
303
00:16:32,327 --> 00:16:33,840
We know now
why Uncle Fester has been doing
304
00:16:33,927 --> 00:16:36,964
- all this ridiculous exercising and dieting.
- We do?
305
00:16:37,607 --> 00:16:39,916
Of course.
He wants to become an astronaut.
306
00:16:40,407 --> 00:16:42,762
That's wonderful,
the first Addams in space.
307
00:16:43,167 --> 00:16:45,283
A proud moment, isn't it?
308
00:16:45,407 --> 00:16:47,284
No, it isn't. We can't let him go.
309
00:16:47,367 --> 00:16:48,846
- Why not?
- He's DC.
310
00:16:49,527 --> 00:16:51,245
District of Columbia?
311
00:16:51,407 --> 00:16:52,726
Direct current.
312
00:16:52,807 --> 00:16:54,559
Put DC Fester
313
00:16:54,647 --> 00:16:57,764
in the AC space capsule, and...
314
00:16:58,047 --> 00:17:00,481
Nothing left of Fester
but a plump asteroid.
315
00:17:00,967 --> 00:17:02,400
How courageous.
316
00:17:02,487 --> 00:17:04,637
Willing to blow himself for science.
317
00:17:04,967 --> 00:17:06,082
A true Addams.
318
00:17:06,607 --> 00:17:08,438
He'd set the space program back 20 years.
319
00:17:08,967 --> 00:17:10,844
We must save him from his brave folly.
320
00:17:10,927 --> 00:17:12,645
- But first we better wake him up.
- Oh, yes.
321
00:17:15,647 --> 00:17:17,080
Uncle Fester?
322
00:17:19,367 --> 00:17:20,482
Uncle Fester.
323
00:17:21,767 --> 00:17:23,359
Oh, what we do now?
324
00:17:27,247 --> 00:17:30,000
- You're gonna hit him with that?
- Most certainly not, dear.
325
00:17:38,767 --> 00:17:39,836
Oh, how horrible.
326
00:17:40,287 --> 00:17:42,357
I dreamed I was swimming
the English Channel
327
00:17:42,447 --> 00:17:44,278
and halfway across I sank.
328
00:17:45,047 --> 00:17:46,685
No use trying to conceal it.
329
00:17:46,767 --> 00:17:48,280
I need more exercises.
330
00:17:51,447 --> 00:17:52,960
Hello, Houston?
331
00:17:53,047 --> 00:17:54,526
This is Morticia Addams
332
00:17:54,807 --> 00:17:58,356
and I'd like to speak
to the head of your astronaut program.
333
00:17:59,327 --> 00:18:00,601
He's asleep?
334
00:18:00,727 --> 00:18:02,524
Well, wake him, wake him.
335
00:18:02,647 --> 00:18:04,285
This is a citizen calling.
336
00:18:04,607 --> 00:18:06,325
If he could see you in all your loveliness,
337
00:18:06,407 --> 00:18:09,160
he'd pop out of bed in a minute.
338
00:18:10,527 --> 00:18:12,483
Hello? Hello, General.
339
00:18:12,767 --> 00:18:14,325
This is Morticia Addams.
340
00:18:14,727 --> 00:18:16,399
Now, I don't mean to be critical,
341
00:18:16,727 --> 00:18:19,764
but I do think you're going a bit far
in drafting Uncle Fester
342
00:18:20,007 --> 00:18:21,998
for your next Gemini shot.
343
00:18:22,527 --> 00:18:24,677
Well, not that he isn't
willing to go, of course.
344
00:18:24,847 --> 00:18:26,075
But we do feel...
345
00:18:27,487 --> 00:18:28,476
Yes.
346
00:18:28,967 --> 00:18:31,606
Yes, I do know you have
a moon shot in the morning.
347
00:18:31,687 --> 00:18:33,405
But that's no reason to lure
348
00:18:33,727 --> 00:18:36,844
plump, happy earthlings
like Uncle Fester away.
349
00:18:38,847 --> 00:18:41,077
Now, now, now. General.
350
00:18:41,407 --> 00:18:43,967
That kind of language will not solve
any problem.
351
00:18:44,687 --> 00:18:45,881
I...
352
00:18:46,687 --> 00:18:48,006
General?
353
00:18:50,047 --> 00:18:51,116
What did he say?
354
00:18:51,327 --> 00:18:52,806
I think the phone went dead.
355
00:18:54,927 --> 00:18:56,440
Morticia.
356
00:18:56,687 --> 00:18:58,200
Look.
357
00:19:01,447 --> 00:19:02,721
Good heavens!
358
00:19:03,007 --> 00:19:05,680
The General's language
must have burned up the phone wires.
359
00:19:19,527 --> 00:19:21,085
Things have come to a pretty pass
360
00:19:21,167 --> 00:19:24,603
when a man can't have any privacy
in his own steam cabinet.
361
00:19:24,727 --> 00:19:27,958
Uncle Fester, you can stop
this ridiculous exercising.
362
00:19:28,047 --> 00:19:30,242
You've been released
from the astronaut program.
363
00:19:31,047 --> 00:19:32,400
What astronaut program?
364
00:19:32,487 --> 00:19:33,761
Ours, of course.
365
00:19:34,167 --> 00:19:35,964
Unless you sold out to the Russians.
366
00:19:36,047 --> 00:19:38,003
Boy, are you off-base.
367
00:19:38,367 --> 00:19:40,278
I'm doing this for my pen pal, Yvette.
368
00:19:40,647 --> 00:19:42,478
Exercising for a pen pal?
369
00:19:42,567 --> 00:19:43,556
Sure.
370
00:19:43,767 --> 00:19:45,359
She's from the Folies-Bergere.
371
00:19:45,447 --> 00:19:47,278
And she's gonna come over here
and visit me.
372
00:19:47,367 --> 00:19:50,598
And when she gets here,
I'm gonna be real trim and sexy.
373
00:19:52,327 --> 00:19:54,204
Miss Yvette.
374
00:19:55,287 --> 00:19:57,755
Already? Oh, she can't see me like this.
375
00:19:57,847 --> 00:19:58,882
Nonsense.
376
00:19:58,967 --> 00:20:01,356
Fester, old man, you have to go upstairs
and face the music.
377
00:20:01,447 --> 00:20:02,766
Oh, not with this body.
378
00:20:02,887 --> 00:20:04,718
Perhaps she'll love you for your soul.
379
00:20:04,927 --> 00:20:06,838
Well, that's even fatter.
380
00:20:07,047 --> 00:20:08,196
Come on.
381
00:20:13,887 --> 00:20:16,640
Lurch. Where's our visitor from overseas?
382
00:20:17,007 --> 00:20:19,157
In the conservatory.
383
00:20:19,287 --> 00:20:20,606
Oh, please show her in.
384
00:20:20,927 --> 00:20:22,599
Yes, Mrs. Addams.
385
00:20:23,967 --> 00:20:25,764
You know, Morticia, when she sees me,
386
00:20:25,887 --> 00:20:29,004
a great postal romance is going
right down the drain.
387
00:20:29,767 --> 00:20:31,086
Brace up, Uncle Fester.
388
00:20:31,287 --> 00:20:33,357
She'll love you for what you are.
389
00:20:33,447 --> 00:20:35,039
All of it.
390
00:20:40,167 --> 00:20:41,202
Yvette?
391
00:20:41,927 --> 00:20:44,236
Of course, chéri, and you must be Fester.
392
00:20:51,767 --> 00:20:53,325
What an interesting couple.
393
00:20:53,647 --> 00:20:55,524
They're almost an interesting quartet.
394
00:20:57,687 --> 00:21:00,076
But I thought you were
with the Folies-Bergere.
395
00:21:00,167 --> 00:21:01,998
I am, I take care of the costumes.
396
00:21:03,647 --> 00:21:05,956
Oh, no wonder she's putting on weight.
397
00:21:06,407 --> 00:21:08,875
If she takes care of the costumes
at the Folies-Bergere,
398
00:21:08,967 --> 00:21:10,480
she doesn't have much to do.
399
00:21:11,647 --> 00:21:14,559
In your letter to me,
you said to go on a diet.
400
00:21:14,647 --> 00:21:15,921
Of course, chéri.
401
00:21:16,087 --> 00:21:18,237
But to gain weight, not to lose it.
402
00:21:18,967 --> 00:21:20,878
You are nothing but skin and bones.
403
00:21:21,207 --> 00:21:23,004
Not my type at all.
404
00:21:24,887 --> 00:21:26,605
Yvette, you spoke French!
405
00:21:27,287 --> 00:21:28,402
Of course, chéri.
406
00:21:28,487 --> 00:21:31,285
What do you expect
from a French girl, Hungarian?
407
00:21:32,167 --> 00:21:33,486
That's an interesting point.
408
00:21:34,887 --> 00:21:36,525
Well, I must hurry, my cab is waiting.
409
00:21:36,887 --> 00:21:38,559
Keep writing, chéri.
410
00:21:42,207 --> 00:21:45,597
Well, if you can't believe
in the Folies-Bergere,
411
00:21:45,887 --> 00:21:47,286
what's left for a fella?
412
00:21:47,367 --> 00:21:48,766
Well, one good thing, Fester,
413
00:21:48,847 --> 00:21:52,362
now you can stop
all that ridiculous exercise and dieting.
414
00:21:52,807 --> 00:21:55,401
Take my advice.
Put your money on Zen-Yogi.
415
00:22:05,167 --> 00:22:06,964
Hey! I did it.
416
00:22:07,967 --> 00:22:09,958
Well, how handsome you both look.
417
00:22:10,807 --> 00:22:14,277
As Grandpa Squint Addams used to say
about Cousin Blob,
418
00:22:14,967 --> 00:22:17,003
two heads are better than one.
419
00:22:26,567 --> 00:22:28,637
That junk man, really a gem,
420
00:22:29,367 --> 00:22:31,517
offering me money to take the set back.
421
00:22:32,407 --> 00:22:33,681
I'm glad it's back.
422
00:22:33,967 --> 00:22:35,685
These moon shots are so exciting.
423
00:22:36,367 --> 00:22:37,356
Yes.
424
00:22:38,007 --> 00:22:39,884
They do stir up the old corpuscles.
425
00:22:42,647 --> 00:22:44,558
Darling, that missile.
426
00:22:45,127 --> 00:22:47,243
Why is its tail wagging?
427
00:22:50,487 --> 00:22:52,557
Oh, I hate to tell you this, querida,
428
00:22:52,647 --> 00:22:54,558
but you've tuned in on Rin Tin Tin.
429
00:22:59,847 --> 00:23:01,360
There. That's it.
430
00:23:02,407 --> 00:23:03,965
Fester, is anything wrong?
431
00:23:04,047 --> 00:23:05,958
Need a little recharging, that's all.
432
00:23:06,047 --> 00:23:07,526
What's going on?
433
00:23:07,607 --> 00:23:09,040
You're just in time for the moon shot.
434
00:23:09,207 --> 00:23:10,959
Oh, that.
435
00:23:11,287 --> 00:23:12,959
I went through
that whole astronaut booklet
436
00:23:13,047 --> 00:23:14,685
from cover to cover.
437
00:23:14,767 --> 00:23:17,565
I could have gone up in that rocket.
I even volunteered to.
438
00:23:18,287 --> 00:23:21,040
But it's not what you know,
it's who you know.
439
00:23:21,567 --> 00:23:23,444
I think they're getting ready
for the countdown.
440
00:23:23,527 --> 00:23:26,360
- Five. Four. Three.
- Five. Four. Three.
441
00:23:26,887 --> 00:23:30,084
- Two. One...
- Two. One. Blast off.
442
00:23:37,007 --> 00:23:38,838
That's the Addams determination.
443
00:23:38,927 --> 00:23:43,318
If I know Fester, he'll catch up.