1 00:00:16,967 --> 00:00:18,878 They're creepy and they're kooky 2 00:00:18,967 --> 00:00:20,844 Mysterious and spooky 3 00:00:20,927 --> 00:00:22,758 They're altogether ooky 4 00:00:22,847 --> 00:00:24,724 The Addams family 5 00:00:24,807 --> 00:00:26,638 The house is a museum 6 00:00:26,727 --> 00:00:28,445 When people come to see 'em 7 00:00:28,527 --> 00:00:30,404 They really are a scream 8 00:00:30,487 --> 00:00:32,159 The Addams family 9 00:00:33,407 --> 00:00:34,442 Neat. 10 00:00:35,167 --> 00:00:36,202 Sweet. 11 00:00:38,807 --> 00:00:39,796 Petite. 12 00:00:40,007 --> 00:00:41,884 So get a witch's shawl on 13 00:00:41,967 --> 00:00:43,798 A broomstick you can crawl on 14 00:00:43,887 --> 00:00:45,639 We're gonna pay a call on 15 00:00:45,727 --> 00:00:48,400 The Addams family 16 00:01:06,407 --> 00:01:09,046 It's no use. Nothing seems to calm my nerves. 17 00:01:09,127 --> 00:01:10,480 Mine either. 18 00:01:10,767 --> 00:01:13,679 I couldn't believe my eyes when we drove past and saw them 19 00:01:13,767 --> 00:01:16,565 holding the charity bazaar without even calling on us, 20 00:01:16,687 --> 00:01:18,006 or even informing us. 21 00:01:18,087 --> 00:01:20,078 Darling, it was probably an oversight. 22 00:01:20,167 --> 00:01:22,078 Maybe they called and we weren't home. 23 00:01:22,167 --> 00:01:23,964 Impossible. Watch this. 24 00:01:28,727 --> 00:01:31,525 Thing never misses a phone call. Sorry, Thing. False alarm. 25 00:01:34,887 --> 00:01:38,243 What reason could they possibly have for not letting us know? 26 00:01:38,327 --> 00:01:40,477 We've always donated more than our share. 27 00:01:40,567 --> 00:01:44,401 Who else would give them a beautiful stuffed python crushing a water buffalo? 28 00:01:44,527 --> 00:01:49,157 Or the chopping block of Ivan the Terrible, with the original nick still in it? 29 00:01:49,247 --> 00:01:51,761 I even threw in the henchmen's ax that made those nicks. 30 00:01:51,847 --> 00:01:53,041 You didn't. 31 00:01:53,127 --> 00:01:54,685 Well, I got carried away. 32 00:01:54,767 --> 00:01:57,156 Darling, you're generous to a fault. 33 00:01:57,327 --> 00:02:00,524 That's true. Did you see some of the junk the other people gave? 34 00:02:00,607 --> 00:02:03,963 It certainly takes no imagination to donate an original Van Gogh. 35 00:02:04,047 --> 00:02:06,083 Right. Now, if someone donated his ear... 36 00:02:07,887 --> 00:02:10,685 The trouble is it's for such a worthy cause, 37 00:02:10,967 --> 00:02:12,958 a new home for the aged. 38 00:02:13,047 --> 00:02:14,878 I feel we should do our share. 39 00:02:15,127 --> 00:02:18,085 Well, if that's all that's worrying you, forget it. It's all taken care of. 40 00:02:18,167 --> 00:02:20,965 I'm building a home for the aged of our own. 41 00:02:21,327 --> 00:02:23,158 Darling, how wonderful. 42 00:02:23,607 --> 00:02:25,279 There'll be a special ramp just for skateboarding. 43 00:02:25,367 --> 00:02:26,436 What about tennis courts? 44 00:02:26,527 --> 00:02:28,597 Tennis courts and a polo field. 45 00:02:28,687 --> 00:02:30,439 Darling, you're wonderful. 46 00:02:30,527 --> 00:02:32,836 You'll put that other home right out of business. 47 00:02:32,927 --> 00:02:34,679 Why didn't you tell me? 48 00:02:34,767 --> 00:02:36,166 I wanted to surprise you. 49 00:02:40,087 --> 00:02:41,361 - Mother. Father. - Mother. Father. 50 00:02:41,447 --> 00:02:42,675 Darling, the children. 51 00:02:47,327 --> 00:02:49,841 - What's that for? - For later. I don't want to lose my place. 52 00:02:50,687 --> 00:02:52,996 Yes, children, it is a lovely day. 53 00:02:53,087 --> 00:02:54,679 Hello, Mother. Hello, Father. 54 00:02:54,767 --> 00:02:56,086 - Hello. - Hello, darlings. 55 00:02:56,167 --> 00:02:58,840 We found a picture, but we don't know whose it is. 56 00:02:58,927 --> 00:03:00,246 Sure is a slick looker. 57 00:03:00,327 --> 00:03:02,318 - Well, probably me. - It's a she. 58 00:03:03,047 --> 00:03:06,278 Here she is, Mother. Isn't she beautiful? 59 00:03:07,287 --> 00:03:08,766 Sure has pretty hair. 60 00:03:08,847 --> 00:03:10,485 And a nice smile. 61 00:03:11,647 --> 00:03:12,921 Why, that's my mother. 62 00:03:14,367 --> 00:03:15,641 Your Granny Frump. 63 00:03:16,127 --> 00:03:17,845 That's Granny Frump? 64 00:03:17,927 --> 00:03:19,360 When she was a teenager. 65 00:03:19,447 --> 00:03:21,403 - Sure is pretty. - A dazzler. 66 00:03:21,487 --> 00:03:23,159 Sure has changed. 67 00:03:23,247 --> 00:03:26,364 Well, darling, you have to remember, she's a lot older now. 68 00:03:26,447 --> 00:03:28,563 I wish she was still as pretty. 69 00:03:28,647 --> 00:03:31,605 She is. Except now, it's on the inside. 70 00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:33,759 On the inside? 71 00:03:34,167 --> 00:03:36,806 I'll show you. There. 72 00:03:37,327 --> 00:03:40,046 Ever see anything more beautiful than that? 73 00:03:43,367 --> 00:03:47,440 I have a lovely idea. Next week is my mother's birthday, 74 00:03:47,527 --> 00:03:50,758 and with Grandmama Addams vacationing on Devil's Island, 75 00:03:50,847 --> 00:03:54,078 why don't I call on Granny Frump and have her spend a few days with us? 76 00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:55,566 By all means. 77 00:03:55,687 --> 00:04:01,159 And for her birthday, we could send her to Barbara Benson's Beauty Farm. 78 00:04:01,287 --> 00:04:02,561 Perhaps in a week or two, 79 00:04:02,647 --> 00:04:06,640 they could bring some of her beauty back and put it on the outside. 80 00:04:06,727 --> 00:04:09,002 It would probably be more like a year or two. 81 00:04:09,527 --> 00:04:11,040 Why quibble about time? 82 00:04:11,127 --> 00:04:14,961 It's only money, and besides, nothing's too good for your mother. 83 00:04:15,567 --> 00:04:18,161 It'd be worth anything to see her look like that again. 84 00:04:18,247 --> 00:04:20,363 Well, you can't expect miracles, darling. 85 00:04:20,447 --> 00:04:23,564 I'll call Granny and ask her to come and stay with us. 86 00:04:23,647 --> 00:04:27,401 But I want her birthday present to be a surprise until her birthday. 87 00:04:27,487 --> 00:04:28,556 - Okay. - Okay. 88 00:04:28,647 --> 00:04:31,161 - You promise? - Cross my heart. 89 00:04:31,247 --> 00:04:33,761 - Me, too. - That's wonderful, children. 90 00:04:33,847 --> 00:04:36,202 Now, run out into the kitchen and get a snack. 91 00:04:36,287 --> 00:04:39,404 Lurch has baked a lovely soufflé of aardvark. 92 00:04:39,487 --> 00:04:43,082 Couldn't I just have a little bowl of sea slug? 93 00:04:43,167 --> 00:04:45,442 For dessert, darling, for dessert. 94 00:04:49,127 --> 00:04:50,879 Now to find my place. 95 00:05:02,407 --> 00:05:04,318 Mrs. Frump. 96 00:05:04,407 --> 00:05:06,125 Lurch, you sure look terrible. 97 00:05:06,207 --> 00:05:07,879 - Mother! - Morticia. 98 00:05:08,967 --> 00:05:10,116 Mother. 99 00:05:11,327 --> 00:05:14,956 You look terrible, too. Well, don't just stand there, take the bags. 100 00:05:19,687 --> 00:05:22,326 Oh, Mother, I told you not to. 101 00:05:22,407 --> 00:05:24,716 Well, I had to buy something for the children. 102 00:05:24,807 --> 00:05:28,356 You spoil them dreadfully. Lurch, put that up in the guest room. 103 00:05:29,727 --> 00:05:34,517 I'll show it to the children later. They get such a thrill out of your gifts. 104 00:05:35,167 --> 00:05:37,635 Granny Frump, I thought I heard you. 105 00:05:38,207 --> 00:05:41,995 Stop slobbering. Let me look at you. You look worst of all. 106 00:05:42,207 --> 00:05:44,516 - It's this light. - Nothing wrong with the light. 107 00:05:44,647 --> 00:05:46,603 - That's the trouble. - I'll call the children. 108 00:05:46,687 --> 00:05:50,475 No, no. I'll go up and surprise them. Maybe scare them a little. 109 00:05:54,647 --> 00:06:00,358 424, 425, 110 00:06:01,367 --> 00:06:03,722 426. 111 00:06:04,847 --> 00:06:07,600 All right, Agent Double-000, 112 00:06:07,687 --> 00:06:09,803 are you going to tell me what I want to know? 113 00:06:09,887 --> 00:06:10,876 No. 114 00:06:12,487 --> 00:06:13,681 Surprise. 115 00:06:14,007 --> 00:06:15,235 Granny! 116 00:06:17,287 --> 00:06:19,755 Say, you kids look like a couple of ghosts. 117 00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:20,996 Gosh, thanks, Granny. 118 00:06:21,087 --> 00:06:22,156 What're you doing? 119 00:06:22,247 --> 00:06:24,317 Playing Chinese water torture. 120 00:06:24,407 --> 00:06:26,238 Nice game. Clean, too. 121 00:06:26,327 --> 00:06:28,887 Granny, are you in for a big surprise. 122 00:06:28,967 --> 00:06:30,002 I am? 123 00:06:31,127 --> 00:06:34,358 Remember, Pugsley, you crossed your heart. 124 00:06:34,447 --> 00:06:35,926 I wasn't going to tell her anything, 125 00:06:36,007 --> 00:06:38,760 except that Mother and Father are going to send her away. 126 00:06:38,847 --> 00:06:40,803 Send me away? Where to? 127 00:06:40,887 --> 00:06:42,445 That's the secret. 128 00:06:42,767 --> 00:06:45,804 I bet it's the jungle. That hot, steaming jungle. 129 00:06:45,887 --> 00:06:48,276 Great for my sinuses. Well, gotta unpack. 130 00:06:49,407 --> 00:06:53,002 Wait till you kids see what I brought you. Really kill you. 131 00:06:59,327 --> 00:07:00,362 Hi, Granny. 132 00:07:00,447 --> 00:07:01,562 What're you doing? 133 00:07:01,647 --> 00:07:03,603 I'm manicuring my fingernails. 134 00:07:03,807 --> 00:07:06,321 Fear I have a little too much iron in my blood. 135 00:07:07,247 --> 00:07:11,081 Gomez and Morticia are planning to send me away. Happen to know where? 136 00:07:11,327 --> 00:07:12,806 I didn't hear anything. 137 00:07:12,887 --> 00:07:14,081 Not even a hint? 138 00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:17,876 Well, let's see, yesterday they were talking about a bazaar 139 00:07:17,967 --> 00:07:20,003 and a home for the aged. 140 00:07:20,087 --> 00:07:21,566 Oh, no. 141 00:07:22,087 --> 00:07:24,806 They're not planning to send me away, they're planning to put me away. 142 00:07:24,887 --> 00:07:27,276 Well, what's the difference? Send or put? 143 00:07:28,847 --> 00:07:32,044 When Morticia wanted to go to work at the age of 10, did I stop her? No. 144 00:07:32,127 --> 00:07:34,163 When she had pneumonia and wanted to run out in the snow and play, 145 00:07:34,247 --> 00:07:35,839 did I stop her? No. 146 00:07:35,927 --> 00:07:38,760 When she tried to run away from home, did I stop her? No. 147 00:07:38,847 --> 00:07:41,236 And what's my reward? An old folk's home. 148 00:07:41,327 --> 00:07:45,445 Well, that's it. A perfect gift for a person who has everything. 149 00:07:52,927 --> 00:07:55,316 There you are, Gomez, darling. 150 00:07:55,407 --> 00:07:58,843 I wanted you to send a check to Barbara Benson's Beauty Farm. 151 00:07:58,927 --> 00:08:01,725 I've arranged for my mother to stay there for two weeks. 152 00:08:01,807 --> 00:08:04,799 I know it's the best birthday present we can possibly give her. 153 00:08:05,367 --> 00:08:07,801 I'll make a memo so I don't forget. 154 00:08:07,967 --> 00:08:10,003 What's all this other paperwork, dear? 155 00:08:10,087 --> 00:08:12,920 Some notes and plans for my home for the aged. 156 00:08:13,407 --> 00:08:17,525 I've added an ice skating rink and a ski jump for winter sports. 157 00:08:17,607 --> 00:08:19,006 How thoughtful. 158 00:08:19,087 --> 00:08:21,965 Here's the combination kitchen and garage, 159 00:08:22,047 --> 00:08:23,924 and there's the recreation room and discotheque. 160 00:08:24,007 --> 00:08:25,884 - For men or women? - Both. 161 00:08:26,007 --> 00:08:27,918 - Together? - Querida, you're forgetting, 162 00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:29,838 this is a home for the aged. 163 00:08:30,087 --> 00:08:31,600 You wicked man. 164 00:08:37,007 --> 00:08:38,838 Fester, I just know I'm right. 165 00:08:38,927 --> 00:08:41,521 I just know they're planning to put me out to pasture. 166 00:08:41,607 --> 00:08:44,440 Well, you are the outdoor type. 167 00:08:45,327 --> 00:08:46,396 Look. 168 00:08:48,087 --> 00:08:50,806 "Home for the aged"! Look at this. 169 00:08:50,887 --> 00:08:53,560 "Send check to cover Granny's reservation." 170 00:08:54,287 --> 00:08:57,324 You see, you were afraid they were gonna put you out to pasture. 171 00:08:57,407 --> 00:08:59,159 They're just going to send you to a reservation. 172 00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:01,966 No, no. They're going to send me to a home for the aged, 173 00:09:02,047 --> 00:09:03,878 and I don't want to go. 174 00:09:08,447 --> 00:09:12,725 Hey, maybe if you show them how much pep you still got, 175 00:09:12,807 --> 00:09:15,275 you know, make yourself useful around the house. 176 00:09:15,367 --> 00:09:17,642 Oh, Fester, I could just kiss you. 177 00:09:18,407 --> 00:09:20,079 I was only trying to help. 178 00:09:35,047 --> 00:09:36,639 Are you all right, deary? 179 00:09:36,727 --> 00:09:38,718 If there's anything you want, let me get it for you. 180 00:09:38,807 --> 00:09:40,684 - Just fine, Mother. - That's just your imagination. 181 00:09:40,767 --> 00:09:41,882 I'll fix you a little snack. 182 00:09:41,967 --> 00:09:44,197 Some porcupine cookies, a bit of mongoose broth. 183 00:09:44,287 --> 00:09:45,322 I just had lunch, dear. 184 00:09:45,407 --> 00:09:48,001 Well, how about an ottoman for your feet? Shall I open the window? 185 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:49,805 - But the window is open. - Then I'll close it. 186 00:09:49,887 --> 00:09:54,563 Well, of course, it's chilly in here. I'll get you a blanket, too. A nice itchy one. 187 00:09:57,807 --> 00:09:58,922 Gomez. 188 00:10:00,447 --> 00:10:01,926 Gomez, darling. 189 00:10:07,087 --> 00:10:11,080 That name. It drives me wild. Especially when I'm shaving. 190 00:10:13,727 --> 00:10:16,799 I'm sorry. I didn't see you, Gomez. I'll get a double blanket for you. 191 00:10:19,727 --> 00:10:21,080 What's the matter with her? 192 00:10:21,167 --> 00:10:22,566 I was just going to ask you that. 193 00:10:22,647 --> 00:10:24,205 Glad I asked first. 194 00:10:24,527 --> 00:10:27,246 She's probably still a bit upset after her trip. 195 00:10:27,327 --> 00:10:29,158 Two weeks at the beauty farm should help. 196 00:10:29,247 --> 00:10:30,566 Can't hurt. 197 00:10:36,807 --> 00:10:39,162 There, that'll keep you both warm. 198 00:10:43,367 --> 00:10:46,723 Mother, why don't you go downstairs to the playroom 199 00:10:46,807 --> 00:10:48,923 and stretch out on the bed of nails? 200 00:10:49,007 --> 00:10:50,360 You need a little relaxation. 201 00:10:50,447 --> 00:10:53,678 Me, relax? Never. Go, go, go. That's me. 202 00:10:56,527 --> 00:10:59,599 Give me that. Just love to dust and do things around the house. 203 00:10:59,687 --> 00:11:02,281 - Mother. - Just call me busy fingers. 204 00:11:02,367 --> 00:11:04,483 I think I'll dust my way right up to the attic, 205 00:11:04,567 --> 00:11:06,797 and when I finish that, I'll do the yard. 206 00:11:06,887 --> 00:11:09,765 Just gotta keep go, go, going. Go, go, go, go. 207 00:11:10,247 --> 00:11:12,636 Dusting the yard? That's ridiculous. 208 00:11:12,967 --> 00:11:15,845 Of course it is. Lurch has already dusted it. 209 00:11:17,287 --> 00:11:18,515 Yes, Lurch, what is it? 210 00:11:18,607 --> 00:11:20,245 Mrs. Frump, 211 00:11:21,407 --> 00:11:26,356 washed the clothes, polished the silverware. 212 00:11:32,447 --> 00:11:35,200 I think I better have a talk with my mother. 213 00:11:35,527 --> 00:11:38,837 You know, deep inside, she's really a wonderful person. 214 00:11:39,127 --> 00:11:42,039 Of course she is. You can tell by her picture. 215 00:11:52,407 --> 00:11:53,726 - Mother. - Doing dishes. 216 00:11:53,807 --> 00:11:55,923 Yesiree, Bob! That's the life. 217 00:12:11,807 --> 00:12:14,037 I like drying them even better. 218 00:12:39,367 --> 00:12:41,835 Well, that's that. Fixed dinner for tonight, 219 00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:44,600 dinner for tomorrow's cooking, ordered groceries for a month, 220 00:12:44,687 --> 00:12:46,837 set the table and packed the children's lunch. 221 00:12:46,927 --> 00:12:48,883 Well, I heard Lurch say the car's been acting up. 222 00:12:48,967 --> 00:12:50,286 Think I'll give it a good overhauling. 223 00:12:50,367 --> 00:12:51,482 Mother. 224 00:12:51,567 --> 00:12:53,080 - Sorry. Too busy. - Mother, Mother. 225 00:12:53,167 --> 00:12:56,762 Now, listen, you've got to stop trying to do so much. 226 00:12:57,887 --> 00:13:00,606 Think I'm too old? Ridiculous. 227 00:13:00,847 --> 00:13:03,645 Mother, Mother. No, darling, it isn't that. 228 00:13:03,727 --> 00:13:07,356 It's just that this is Lurch's domain and he feels you're invading it. 229 00:13:07,447 --> 00:13:09,677 Besides, you should relax more at your age. 230 00:13:09,767 --> 00:13:15,125 At my age? I never felt better in my life. Until just now. 231 00:13:23,527 --> 00:13:26,678 Don't worry, Granny Frump, I'll cheer you up. 232 00:13:26,927 --> 00:13:27,962 How? 233 00:13:28,727 --> 00:13:31,287 By reciting the poem I wrote. 234 00:13:31,367 --> 00:13:33,562 "I have a gloomy little spider 235 00:13:33,647 --> 00:13:36,241 "I love to sit down close beside her 236 00:13:36,327 --> 00:13:40,639 "She never knows where she has been 'Cause all she does is spin and spin 237 00:13:40,807 --> 00:13:42,877 "My spider's quite a busy roamer 238 00:13:42,967 --> 00:13:45,197 "Which is why I called her Homer 239 00:13:45,287 --> 00:13:47,517 "She loves to work and spin all day 240 00:13:47,607 --> 00:13:49,438 "And then, at night, she likes to play 241 00:13:49,527 --> 00:13:51,597 "Her web is like my mother's hair 242 00:13:51,687 --> 00:13:53,996 "Her eyes have got my father's stare 243 00:13:54,087 --> 00:13:57,762 "She may not jump, or twist, or bend 244 00:13:57,847 --> 00:14:00,520 "But a spider's a girl's best friend" 245 00:14:00,807 --> 00:14:01,922 Did you like it? 246 00:14:02,007 --> 00:14:04,157 It's sweet, but I'm still sad. 247 00:14:09,087 --> 00:14:13,956 This is my favorite picture of you when you were so young and beautiful. 248 00:14:14,047 --> 00:14:16,038 Were? I still am. 249 00:14:16,487 --> 00:14:20,002 Oh, sure, but now it's only on the inside. 250 00:14:20,087 --> 00:14:21,645 Inside, huh? 251 00:14:21,727 --> 00:14:24,287 Well, I'm gonna put it on the outside. 252 00:14:44,127 --> 00:14:45,196 Hi. 253 00:14:57,607 --> 00:14:59,245 I don't believe it. 254 00:14:59,447 --> 00:15:02,200 - You don't believe what? - See for yourself. 255 00:15:04,527 --> 00:15:06,438 I don't believe it. 256 00:15:22,327 --> 00:15:23,362 Yes. 257 00:15:24,047 --> 00:15:25,958 Yes, we appreciate that. 258 00:15:26,207 --> 00:15:28,482 Then we'll expect you right after dinner? 259 00:15:28,767 --> 00:15:30,166 Thank you very much. 260 00:15:30,447 --> 00:15:31,800 Goodbye. 261 00:15:35,287 --> 00:15:37,642 That's the hardest phone call I've ever had to make. 262 00:15:37,727 --> 00:15:41,766 Yes, a far cry from making reservations for your mother at Barbara Benson's 263 00:15:41,847 --> 00:15:44,680 to making them at the Happy Valley Institute. 264 00:15:45,327 --> 00:15:47,636 I just hope we did the right thing. 265 00:15:47,727 --> 00:15:51,356 Well, you saw for yourself. Pogo sticks, jump rope. 266 00:15:51,447 --> 00:15:53,517 Right now, she's upstairs playing cops and robbers. 267 00:15:53,607 --> 00:15:55,006 Stick 'em up! 268 00:15:57,967 --> 00:16:01,323 Don't worry, querida, Dr. Jonley has a fine reputation. 269 00:16:01,407 --> 00:16:04,365 One look at Granny, and he'll know exactly what to do for her. 270 00:16:04,447 --> 00:16:05,766 Oh, Gomez, 271 00:16:05,847 --> 00:16:08,839 I don't know what would've become of me if I hadn't met you. 272 00:16:08,927 --> 00:16:11,077 You were fortunate, my dear. 273 00:16:11,807 --> 00:16:14,605 How about a go at the trains, just to relax? 274 00:16:14,847 --> 00:16:16,360 Splendid idea. 275 00:16:17,487 --> 00:16:19,443 I'll operate the switches. You can blow up the train. 276 00:16:19,527 --> 00:16:23,884 Oh, no, darling, you blow up the trains. I know how you love those wrecks. 277 00:16:23,967 --> 00:16:26,640 Naturally. I had one go through the ceiling yesterday. 278 00:16:26,727 --> 00:16:27,762 - You didn't. - Oh, yeah. 279 00:16:27,847 --> 00:16:29,485 Shower of plaster and everything. 280 00:16:29,567 --> 00:16:31,205 You've been practicing. 281 00:16:31,287 --> 00:16:33,118 Used some of Pugsley's TNT. 282 00:16:33,207 --> 00:16:35,402 Young fellow really knows how to mix an explosive. 283 00:16:35,487 --> 00:16:37,000 Makes a mother proud. 284 00:16:37,087 --> 00:16:40,762 All right, my dear, as soon as the last car clears this tunnel, 285 00:16:40,847 --> 00:16:42,485 count three and... 286 00:16:43,047 --> 00:16:45,607 - Wonderful. - All right, start them up. 287 00:16:47,607 --> 00:16:49,279 Faster. Faster. 288 00:16:49,527 --> 00:16:50,801 Let them go wild. 289 00:16:50,887 --> 00:16:52,445 Maybe one of them will fly off the track. 290 00:16:52,527 --> 00:16:55,837 Yes, darling, yes. I love runaway trains. 291 00:16:56,247 --> 00:16:58,636 All right, now, as soon as the train clears the tunnel... 292 00:17:09,847 --> 00:17:11,678 Now, that's what I call a real mystery. 293 00:17:11,767 --> 00:17:13,280 Fester must have been fooling around with this. 294 00:17:13,367 --> 00:17:16,404 Something like this always happens when he does. 295 00:17:26,327 --> 00:17:27,726 Beautiful. 296 00:17:29,167 --> 00:17:31,123 Didn't hit the ceiling. 297 00:17:31,207 --> 00:17:33,516 Darling, you can't win them all. 298 00:17:45,527 --> 00:17:47,563 How do you do, Mrs. Addams? I'm Dr. Jonley. 299 00:17:47,647 --> 00:17:50,081 I'm Mr. Addams. This is Mrs. Addams. 300 00:17:50,167 --> 00:17:53,125 Oh, I'm so sorry. It must be the light, or maybe it's my glasses. 301 00:17:53,207 --> 00:17:55,846 It is my glasses. I'm not wearing them. I'm so sorry. I'm Dr. Jonley. 302 00:17:55,927 --> 00:17:58,282 - How do you do, Mrs. Addams? - How do you do? 303 00:17:58,367 --> 00:18:00,198 - Won't you come in? - Thank you. 304 00:18:08,807 --> 00:18:10,638 Doctor, we asked you to stop by 305 00:18:10,727 --> 00:18:14,959 because a member of our family has been behaving, well, strangely. 306 00:18:15,447 --> 00:18:16,516 I understand. 307 00:18:16,607 --> 00:18:18,279 And we thought perhaps by your talking... 308 00:18:20,247 --> 00:18:21,282 Hi! 309 00:18:22,527 --> 00:18:24,836 Oh, he should be put away immediately. 310 00:18:24,927 --> 00:18:26,963 Oh, no, he's not the one. 311 00:18:27,927 --> 00:18:28,962 Fester, this is the head... 312 00:18:29,047 --> 00:18:30,480 Oh, I'm sorry, I got no time now. 313 00:18:30,567 --> 00:18:32,285 Big news. Gotta see Granny. 314 00:18:32,367 --> 00:18:34,039 Well, nice talking to you. 315 00:18:34,127 --> 00:18:36,766 Dear, would you tell Granny we'd like to see her? 316 00:18:36,847 --> 00:18:38,200 Roger. Bye! 317 00:18:40,567 --> 00:18:42,762 Are you sure he's not the one? 318 00:18:47,927 --> 00:18:49,599 Just a minute. 319 00:18:54,527 --> 00:18:55,755 Come in. 320 00:18:57,247 --> 00:18:59,636 Okay, you can forget the kid stuff. 321 00:18:59,727 --> 00:19:03,003 I wish I could. It's making me old fast. 322 00:19:03,087 --> 00:19:05,237 Well, I got big news for you. 323 00:19:05,847 --> 00:19:07,997 You mean they're gonna send me away anyway? 324 00:19:08,087 --> 00:19:11,159 Yep, but not to the home for the aged. 325 00:19:11,247 --> 00:19:13,317 That's something that Gomez is building. 326 00:19:13,407 --> 00:19:15,238 They're sending you to a beauty farm. 327 00:19:15,327 --> 00:19:16,555 A beauty farm? 328 00:19:16,647 --> 00:19:20,162 Yeah, it was a surprise, but I got Pugsley and Wednesday to tell me. 329 00:19:20,247 --> 00:19:21,521 What a relief. 330 00:19:21,607 --> 00:19:23,438 Yeah, they wanna see you downstairs. 331 00:19:23,527 --> 00:19:25,722 There's some fella there. I think he runs the place. 332 00:19:25,807 --> 00:19:27,240 Just a minute. 333 00:19:27,327 --> 00:19:29,397 One thing I don't understand. 334 00:19:29,487 --> 00:19:31,159 What's that? 335 00:19:31,247 --> 00:19:33,841 Why they wanna send me to a beauty farm. 336 00:19:39,447 --> 00:19:40,846 Pogo stick. 337 00:19:40,927 --> 00:19:42,485 The jumping rope. 338 00:19:43,247 --> 00:19:45,636 They're typical regressions to a second childhood. 339 00:19:45,727 --> 00:19:48,878 Yes, yes, yes, these things are very difficult to handle at the home level. 340 00:19:48,967 --> 00:19:50,286 But at Happy Valley, 341 00:19:50,367 --> 00:19:53,643 there's something wrong with a patient who isn't jumping rope 342 00:19:53,727 --> 00:19:55,797 or dancing the Watusi. 343 00:19:56,727 --> 00:19:58,957 Morticia? Oh, there you are. 344 00:19:59,327 --> 00:20:01,204 Mother, this gentleman is here... 345 00:20:01,287 --> 00:20:02,720 You needn't explain, Morticia. 346 00:20:02,807 --> 00:20:04,957 I know all about the place, and I'm all for it. 347 00:20:05,047 --> 00:20:06,560 You are? 348 00:20:06,887 --> 00:20:08,400 Oh, well, isn't that nice? 349 00:20:08,487 --> 00:20:10,443 Could be a real lifesaver. 350 00:20:10,527 --> 00:20:12,518 Oh, Gomez, I'm not that bad. 351 00:20:12,607 --> 00:20:14,723 - Am I? - No, no, no, not at all. 352 00:20:14,807 --> 00:20:17,116 These cases have to be handled with kid gloves. 353 00:20:17,207 --> 00:20:18,879 Who told you about our place? 354 00:20:18,967 --> 00:20:22,198 Oh, I've heard about it for years. Some of my best friends have been there. 355 00:20:22,287 --> 00:20:25,643 Granny, we don't want you to get the idea that we're trying to get rid of you. 356 00:20:25,727 --> 00:20:28,116 Get rid of me? Why, I want to go. 357 00:20:28,287 --> 00:20:30,847 There's one thing we must insist on, though, 358 00:20:31,007 --> 00:20:32,918 and that's a quiet room. 359 00:20:33,367 --> 00:20:35,676 I do hope your walls are well insulated. 360 00:20:35,767 --> 00:20:37,519 We have a few where the walls are padded. 361 00:20:37,607 --> 00:20:40,246 Oh, Gomez, I don't know how much extra it would cost, 362 00:20:40,327 --> 00:20:42,682 but I would certainly like to have one of those. 363 00:20:43,207 --> 00:20:44,845 One padded room coming up. 364 00:20:44,927 --> 00:20:47,805 Oh, I may never want to leave. Let's go. 365 00:20:47,887 --> 00:20:51,800 You can ship my things, Morticia. Thank you, thank you, thank you. 366 00:20:52,487 --> 00:20:54,842 Looks like we did the right thing. 367 00:20:54,927 --> 00:20:58,158 Oh, the poor dear, she's further gone than I thought. 368 00:20:58,247 --> 00:21:00,681 Well, as long as it makes her happy. 369 00:21:19,647 --> 00:21:22,878 Tokyo, Fujiyama 370 00:21:23,047 --> 00:21:25,242 Osaka 371 00:21:29,087 --> 00:21:32,159 It's a little something I composed, darling. Do you like it? 372 00:21:33,047 --> 00:21:36,323 I don't know about the melody, but I love the words. 373 00:21:36,407 --> 00:21:38,762 Yes, the words are the best part. 374 00:21:40,607 --> 00:21:42,962 Darling, you've been hanging there for three hours. 375 00:21:43,047 --> 00:21:44,719 Aren't you getting a little tired? 376 00:21:45,367 --> 00:21:48,040 Tired? This is the perfect way to relax. 377 00:21:50,087 --> 00:21:51,566 Mail's in. 378 00:21:52,047 --> 00:21:53,685 Thank you, Thing. 379 00:22:00,807 --> 00:22:02,081 It's from my mother. 380 00:22:07,087 --> 00:22:08,520 How's she getting along? 381 00:22:08,607 --> 00:22:11,075 She's doing nicely. Listen to this. 382 00:22:11,487 --> 00:22:15,321 "I really like this place. You meet a very nice class of people. 383 00:22:15,927 --> 00:22:17,519 "Though I'm looking much better, 384 00:22:17,607 --> 00:22:21,395 "Dr. Jonley thinks I might have to stay a lot longer than he thought. 385 00:22:21,487 --> 00:22:22,761 "Love, Mother." 386 00:22:22,847 --> 00:22:25,315 I knew it. It's her kind of place. 387 00:22:29,247 --> 00:22:31,442 Mother, what are you doing here? 388 00:22:31,527 --> 00:22:32,801 Some beauty farm. 389 00:22:32,887 --> 00:22:36,357 There wasn't a person there who could give me a permanent. 390 00:22:41,087 --> 00:22:42,918 Don't worry, darling, 391 00:22:43,007 --> 00:22:46,443 I can tell just by looking at you that you're all well.