1
00:00:16,647 --> 00:00:18,763
They're creepy and they're kooky
2
00:00:18,847 --> 00:00:20,678
Mysterious and spooky
3
00:00:20,767 --> 00:00:22,598
They're altogether ooky
4
00:00:22,687 --> 00:00:24,564
The Addams family
5
00:00:24,647 --> 00:00:26,478
The house is a museum
6
00:00:26,567 --> 00:00:28,444
When people come to see 'em
7
00:00:28,527 --> 00:00:30,324
They really are a scream
8
00:00:30,407 --> 00:00:31,965
The Addams family
9
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:34,402
Neat.
10
00:00:34,847 --> 00:00:35,916
Sweet.
11
00:00:38,887 --> 00:00:39,956
Petite.
12
00:00:40,047 --> 00:00:41,685
So get a witch's shawl on
13
00:00:41,767 --> 00:00:43,598
A broomstick you can crawl on
14
00:00:43,687 --> 00:00:45,518
We're gonna pay a call on
15
00:00:45,607 --> 00:00:48,201
The Addams family
16
00:01:14,207 --> 00:01:15,640
Uncle Fester, what're you doing?
17
00:01:15,727 --> 00:01:17,365
Well, I'm waxing my head.
18
00:01:17,807 --> 00:01:20,640
It's all part
of the national beautification program.
19
00:01:20,887 --> 00:01:22,957
The national beautification program?
20
00:01:23,047 --> 00:01:24,685
Yes, it was on TV.
21
00:01:24,767 --> 00:01:27,486
You see, the White House
wants everybody to join
22
00:01:27,567 --> 00:01:30,479
in making everything in the country
more beautiful.
23
00:01:30,567 --> 00:01:33,639
And did you ever see
my head look more beautiful?
24
00:01:34,287 --> 00:01:35,720
Oh, yes, it is lovely.
25
00:01:35,807 --> 00:01:37,604
Yeah, it's that hard coat.
26
00:01:39,127 --> 00:01:41,516
That's very patriotic of you, Uncle Fester.
27
00:01:41,847 --> 00:01:44,566
I think Gomez and I should join
in the program, too.
28
00:01:45,127 --> 00:01:48,915
Besides, there are a lot of lovely things
I've been wanting to buy.
29
00:01:57,607 --> 00:02:00,405
- Three oranges!
- Oh, what did you get, dear?
30
00:02:01,207 --> 00:02:02,401
Three oranges!
31
00:02:04,247 --> 00:02:05,965
How's the unpacking coming?
32
00:02:08,087 --> 00:02:10,681
These shopping sprees are so exhausting.
33
00:02:11,287 --> 00:02:13,118
What's in this alligator case?
34
00:02:14,967 --> 00:02:16,116
An alligator.
35
00:02:16,807 --> 00:02:18,286
Nice pet for Pugsley.
36
00:02:18,647 --> 00:02:21,844
No. I'm thinking of doing
this room over, dear,
37
00:02:22,287 --> 00:02:24,403
in sort of Early Zoo.
38
00:02:24,487 --> 00:02:26,205
That sounds wonderful.
39
00:02:26,287 --> 00:02:29,643
We do have a good start,
but tampering with perfection?
40
00:02:31,287 --> 00:02:34,484
It's all part of
the national beautification program, dear.
41
00:02:34,887 --> 00:02:37,037
I think everyone should do their bit.
42
00:02:39,967 --> 00:02:43,960
But I would like to bring beauty
into the lives and homes of others as well.
43
00:02:44,647 --> 00:02:48,765
Who better than you, cara mia,
with your exquisite taste, to do that.
44
00:02:48,847 --> 00:02:50,075
Darling.
45
00:02:50,167 --> 00:02:55,366
But in order to inspire confidence,
I need a showplace, a model home.
46
00:02:55,447 --> 00:02:57,517
Querida, you've got one right here.
47
00:02:57,687 --> 00:02:59,405
No, darling.
48
00:02:59,487 --> 00:03:03,275
This house is a tribute
to generations of Addams taste.
49
00:03:03,367 --> 00:03:05,927
It took years to achieve its rare beauty.
50
00:03:06,287 --> 00:03:08,005
I should start from scratch.
51
00:03:10,647 --> 00:03:12,558
Just arrived.
52
00:03:12,647 --> 00:03:16,242
Yes, thank you, Lurch. Let's see.
Put it over there, please.
53
00:03:16,567 --> 00:03:19,559
Carefully. Carefully, don't bump it now.
54
00:03:20,287 --> 00:03:21,276
Oh, yes.
55
00:03:21,687 --> 00:03:23,757
Gently, Lurch, gently.
56
00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:28,525
Thank you. That'll be all.
57
00:03:28,607 --> 00:03:30,279
- Darling, look.
- What is it?
58
00:03:30,807 --> 00:03:32,081
Can't you guess?
59
00:03:32,647 --> 00:03:35,366
We've never seen
a canary that size before.
60
00:03:35,607 --> 00:03:37,086
I'll give you a hint.
61
00:03:38,967 --> 00:03:42,084
Tish, that sound sets my blood afire.
62
00:03:43,847 --> 00:03:46,122
Mating cry of the Transylvanian vulture.
63
00:03:52,087 --> 00:03:55,443
It is a Transylvanian vulture.
We should get a pair.
64
00:03:57,327 --> 00:03:58,646
Oh, but I ordered two.
65
00:04:01,247 --> 00:04:02,646
You naughty bird.
66
00:04:04,367 --> 00:04:07,120
Morticia, you have impeccable taste.
67
00:04:07,207 --> 00:04:09,960
Well, of course. I married you, didn't I?
68
00:04:11,567 --> 00:04:15,480
You know, sometimes I think
it's wrong of me to keep you all to myself
69
00:04:15,567 --> 00:04:17,444
in a world starved for beauty.
70
00:04:18,087 --> 00:04:19,315
I know what you mean.
71
00:04:19,407 --> 00:04:23,241
For instance, our next-door neighbor,
Mrs. Digby?
72
00:04:23,687 --> 00:04:27,202
Every time she passes this house,
she stares at it
73
00:04:27,287 --> 00:04:30,484
with that expression on her face
that I've come to know so well.
74
00:04:30,567 --> 00:04:31,602
Raw envy.
75
00:04:33,167 --> 00:04:35,556
We certainly are surrounded
by great beauty.
76
00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:38,205
We should insure it.
77
00:04:38,607 --> 00:04:41,440
That reminds me, isn't what's-his-name,
Digby, our next door neighbor,
78
00:04:41,527 --> 00:04:43,404
isn't he an insurance man?
79
00:04:43,487 --> 00:04:45,159
Let's give him the business.
80
00:04:45,247 --> 00:04:47,841
- You mean, our good neighbor policy?
- Exactly.
81
00:04:48,247 --> 00:04:53,002
But first, let me hear
that wild music of the vulture's cry.
82
00:04:53,287 --> 00:04:56,040
Darling, you promise
you'll try to control yourself?
83
00:04:56,687 --> 00:04:57,676
I'll try.
84
00:05:01,887 --> 00:05:04,196
- They're at it again.
- Take it easy, honey.
85
00:05:04,287 --> 00:05:05,481
After all, we never see them.
86
00:05:05,567 --> 00:05:07,683
Well, it's almost worse this way,
just hearing them.
87
00:05:07,767 --> 00:05:09,917
We won't live next door to them forever.
88
00:05:10,007 --> 00:05:12,202
Joe, we've been living next door to them
for three weeks now
89
00:05:12,287 --> 00:05:14,403
and it seems like forever already.
90
00:05:14,727 --> 00:05:16,877
We have got to get away. Now!
91
00:05:17,647 --> 00:05:18,716
Joe, please.
92
00:05:18,807 --> 00:05:20,240
- Look, honey.
- Please.
93
00:05:21,207 --> 00:05:22,276
Well, okay.
94
00:05:22,927 --> 00:05:26,158
But if I don't get some business soon,
we'll have to move again.
95
00:05:26,727 --> 00:05:27,716
Into the street.
96
00:05:27,807 --> 00:05:29,877
Well, even that would be
an improvement.
97
00:05:30,687 --> 00:05:33,281
- I think I'm gonna go lie down. I just...
- Yeah.
98
00:05:48,607 --> 00:05:50,279
Come in, the door is open.
99
00:05:51,167 --> 00:05:52,680
Aha there, Digby!
100
00:05:52,767 --> 00:05:55,679
Gomez Addams here.
My wife, Morticia, there.
101
00:05:55,767 --> 00:05:57,883
How do you do, Mr. Digby?
102
00:05:58,607 --> 00:06:02,122
- Won't you sit down, Mrs. Addams?
- No, thank you, Mr. Digby.
103
00:06:02,207 --> 00:06:03,845
We'll come right to the point.
104
00:06:03,927 --> 00:06:06,999
We'd like for you to insure our collection
of objets d'art.
105
00:06:07,087 --> 00:06:08,315
That's French.
106
00:06:08,687 --> 00:06:11,724
Gomez, darling, please.
107
00:06:11,807 --> 00:06:13,479
Darling, please.
108
00:06:13,847 --> 00:06:16,361
Insurance now, objets later.
109
00:06:18,727 --> 00:06:20,524
You want to insure something?
110
00:06:21,167 --> 00:06:23,158
Yes, indeed. How about 1,000,000?
111
00:06:23,567 --> 00:06:24,682
1,000,000?
112
00:06:27,127 --> 00:06:28,196
Dollars?
113
00:06:33,647 --> 00:06:35,444
That's very interesting.
114
00:06:35,527 --> 00:06:37,882
How often
do you have to water that table?
115
00:06:39,687 --> 00:06:41,359
I'll draw up the papers immediately.
116
00:06:41,447 --> 00:06:43,403
No hurry.
Just bring them by the house tomorrow.
117
00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:45,159
And bring Mrs. Digby with you.
118
00:06:47,087 --> 00:06:48,679
She's very shy.
119
00:06:49,447 --> 00:06:52,519
Yes, I can tell that
by the way she rushes past our house.
120
00:06:53,767 --> 00:06:57,646
Besides, she's busy on our new home,
working with decorators, you know.
121
00:06:57,727 --> 00:07:01,117
Then you'll have to bring her.
Mrs. Addams is a superb decorator.
122
00:07:01,407 --> 00:07:03,318
I'd be delighted to help.
123
00:07:03,407 --> 00:07:04,965
- Help?
- Yes.
124
00:07:05,047 --> 00:07:09,359
I'd not only feel I was helping a neighbor,
but I'd be serving my country as well.
125
00:07:11,287 --> 00:07:13,005
Oh, yes. Sure.
126
00:07:13,647 --> 00:07:16,957
If I know my wife, you'll get much more
than you bargained for.
127
00:07:17,407 --> 00:07:18,726
Darling.
128
00:07:22,087 --> 00:07:23,520
Good day, Mr. Digby.
129
00:07:23,687 --> 00:07:25,484
Digby, until tomorrow.
130
00:07:37,087 --> 00:07:38,805
- All right now, Fester, you ready?
- Yeah.
131
00:07:38,887 --> 00:07:42,766
One, two, three, heave!
132
00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:48,605
Came out nice and clean.
133
00:07:49,287 --> 00:07:50,959
I don't understand.
134
00:07:51,047 --> 00:07:54,244
Delilah here gave the room such a lift.
135
00:07:54,327 --> 00:07:56,158
- But Morticia needs her.
- What for?
136
00:07:56,247 --> 00:07:58,283
Housewarming gift for our neighbors,
the Digbys.
137
00:07:58,367 --> 00:08:01,245
The Digbys!
Well, what about asking me first?
138
00:08:01,327 --> 00:08:03,887
After all, blood is thicker than water.
139
00:08:03,967 --> 00:08:07,596
Who said anything about giving blood?
After all, we don't know them that well.
140
00:08:07,687 --> 00:08:10,804
The Digbys,
that's all that Morticia thinks about now.
141
00:08:11,367 --> 00:08:13,835
Well, Morticia always does give
too much of herself.
142
00:08:13,927 --> 00:08:16,600
She does? Maybe she will give blood.
143
00:08:17,407 --> 00:08:18,396
No.
144
00:08:19,287 --> 00:08:21,721
Here it is, Morticia. Isn't that beautiful?
145
00:08:22,247 --> 00:08:25,557
I'm glad you're not giving them
our live vulture, that'd be too much.
146
00:08:25,647 --> 00:08:28,719
Even parting with Delilah leaves
a hole in my life.
147
00:08:28,807 --> 00:08:30,399
You should see the wall.
148
00:08:31,687 --> 00:08:33,325
That must be the Digbys.
149
00:08:33,767 --> 00:08:35,678
I'm almost afraid
to let them see the house.
150
00:08:35,767 --> 00:08:36,756
Might discourage them.
151
00:08:36,847 --> 00:08:39,236
Darling, they're just going
to have to be realistic.
152
00:08:39,327 --> 00:08:43,798
After all, when we first moved in here,
this house was bleak and gloomy.
153
00:08:44,487 --> 00:08:46,876
Not everyone can start
with that advantage.
154
00:08:50,247 --> 00:08:52,238
The Digbys.
155
00:08:57,487 --> 00:08:59,796
Welcome, welcome, welcome.
156
00:09:00,567 --> 00:09:01,716
This is Mrs. Digby.
157
00:09:01,807 --> 00:09:02,876
- How do you do.
- Mrs. Digby,
158
00:09:02,967 --> 00:09:05,003
we have a little something for you.
159
00:09:10,487 --> 00:09:12,205
Say, that call is catching.
160
00:09:12,607 --> 00:09:14,757
- Won't you sit down?
- Oh, yes.
161
00:09:18,087 --> 00:09:20,043
Poor dear is overcome by it all.
162
00:09:20,807 --> 00:09:24,083
Now, just take a nice, deep breath.
163
00:09:25,447 --> 00:09:26,926
Save a little for me.
164
00:09:27,887 --> 00:09:30,276
- Joe, let's get out of here.
- Yes, dear.
165
00:09:30,367 --> 00:09:32,085
Soon as we sign the papers.
166
00:09:32,167 --> 00:09:35,045
Digby, how can you talk business
at a time like this?
167
00:09:35,127 --> 00:09:38,039
Besides, we haven't had a chance
to get acquainted yet.
168
00:09:39,007 --> 00:09:40,804
Well, you see, I'm a little tired...
169
00:09:40,887 --> 00:09:43,924
You know, moving into a new house
and finding a decorator...
170
00:09:44,007 --> 00:09:45,725
Digby, didn't you tell her?
171
00:09:46,407 --> 00:09:49,205
- Tell me what?
- You've found your decorator.
172
00:09:49,887 --> 00:09:51,718
- I have? Who?
- Me.
173
00:09:53,327 --> 00:09:56,444
Hey, you've got a real fainter there.
Very feminine.
174
00:09:57,487 --> 00:10:00,126
She's such a shy, sensitive soul.
175
00:10:00,207 --> 00:10:02,767
I know we're going to get along famously.
176
00:10:02,847 --> 00:10:05,680
No more smelling salts.
I feel better when I'm under.
177
00:10:06,607 --> 00:10:08,757
Look, there must be some mistake.
178
00:10:09,567 --> 00:10:11,637
It does seem too good to be true,
doesn't it?
179
00:10:11,727 --> 00:10:15,402
At your husband's urging,
I've decided to do your house myself.
180
00:10:15,487 --> 00:10:17,398
My husband's urging?
181
00:10:17,487 --> 00:10:18,522
Surprise!
182
00:10:19,327 --> 00:10:24,162
Well, now, if you ladies will excuse us,
Mr. Digby and I will repair to the gallery.
183
00:10:24,247 --> 00:10:25,999
I'd like to show him our new art objects.
184
00:10:26,087 --> 00:10:27,076
Digby.
185
00:10:28,287 --> 00:10:29,322
Now, dear.
186
00:10:30,287 --> 00:10:33,245
I have some wonderful ideas
for your new house.
187
00:10:35,167 --> 00:10:37,078
And a most unusual color scheme.
188
00:10:37,447 --> 00:10:39,802
- Oh?
- We'll start with the carpet.
189
00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:41,842
Black.
190
00:10:42,727 --> 00:10:44,877
- Black?
- Pitch.
191
00:10:47,967 --> 00:10:49,525
Perhaps as a base...
192
00:10:50,127 --> 00:10:52,118
- I suppose the curtains...
- Black.
193
00:10:53,567 --> 00:10:55,603
- What about the wallpaper?
- Black.
194
00:10:57,127 --> 00:11:00,039
And the furniture coverings? Black?
195
00:11:00,807 --> 00:11:01,796
No.
196
00:11:03,327 --> 00:11:04,442
Off-black.
197
00:11:07,367 --> 00:11:09,562
You must have some contrast, you know.
198
00:11:16,607 --> 00:11:19,075
- Well, Digby, here's our gallery.
- Gallery?
199
00:11:19,767 --> 00:11:21,723
Now, what were you saying
about insurance?
200
00:11:21,807 --> 00:11:26,358
Oh, all you have to do is sign
and I'll have the company issue a floater.
201
00:11:26,447 --> 00:11:27,516
No problem.
202
00:11:33,527 --> 00:11:35,119
You rang?
203
00:11:35,207 --> 00:11:36,640
A pen, please, Lurch.
204
00:11:40,327 --> 00:11:41,555
Oh, thank you.
205
00:11:48,807 --> 00:11:50,365
That'll be all, Lurch.
206
00:11:50,447 --> 00:11:52,563
- There you are, Digby.
- Gee, thanks.
207
00:11:53,567 --> 00:11:56,365
Thanks a million. Oh, boy.
208
00:11:59,007 --> 00:12:00,599
Beautiful, beautiful.
209
00:12:01,247 --> 00:12:05,035
You know, I can hardly wait
to see that collection of artworks of yours.
210
00:12:05,127 --> 00:12:07,800
You don't have to wait.
You're surrounded by them.
211
00:12:08,207 --> 00:12:10,960
These things? I mean, these things.
212
00:12:11,807 --> 00:12:13,081
Over here, Digby.
213
00:12:15,607 --> 00:12:17,598
- An original Rembrandt.
- Rembrandt?
214
00:12:18,527 --> 00:12:20,165
This says "Flugelsmith."
215
00:12:24,087 --> 00:12:27,557
By george, it does.
These scribbled signatures.
216
00:12:27,927 --> 00:12:30,043
Well, it's an original Flugelsmith.
217
00:12:30,207 --> 00:12:34,041
Speaking of originals,
feast your eyes on this.
218
00:12:34,567 --> 00:12:36,080
Oh, a Stradivarius?
219
00:12:36,167 --> 00:12:38,522
If it isn't, I'm out $12.50.
220
00:12:39,207 --> 00:12:43,678
And, of course, there's my head of
Tigi-Tigi, the Polynesian war chief.
221
00:12:44,127 --> 00:12:45,719
- Bronze?
- Shrunken.
222
00:12:50,047 --> 00:12:52,641
Now, as to your bedroom,
223
00:12:53,047 --> 00:12:57,643
I was thinking
we might do the walls in salmon.
224
00:12:57,727 --> 00:13:00,082
- Pink?
- No, scales.
225
00:13:00,727 --> 00:13:02,206
How's the distaff side doing?
226
00:13:02,287 --> 00:13:04,323
Oh, never mind about us. Did he sign, Joe?
227
00:13:04,407 --> 00:13:06,363
All signed, sealed and delivered.
228
00:13:06,447 --> 00:13:10,122
- Well, nice to have seen you.
- Oh, but we're not even halfway through.
229
00:13:10,447 --> 00:13:13,678
You haven't seen the lovely material
I have for your new den.
230
00:13:13,887 --> 00:13:16,720
- Hand-woven gunnysack.
- Good thinking, my dear.
231
00:13:16,807 --> 00:13:18,798
Well, Mrs. Addams, you're very kind,
232
00:13:18,887 --> 00:13:21,765
but those lovely ideas of yours
are too rich for my blood.
233
00:13:21,847 --> 00:13:22,836
Blood.
234
00:13:23,567 --> 00:13:26,320
That's exactly the color
I planned for your guestroom.
235
00:13:27,727 --> 00:13:31,163
I've decided to live with the things I have
for a few more years.
236
00:13:32,287 --> 00:13:34,039
Well, arrivederci.
237
00:13:37,927 --> 00:13:39,758
Now, what was that all about?
238
00:13:39,967 --> 00:13:42,242
It's obvious, darling. Money.
239
00:13:42,327 --> 00:13:44,443
Great Caesar's ghost, you're right.
240
00:13:44,927 --> 00:13:47,805
That's why they were so overcome
when they saw our house.
241
00:13:47,887 --> 00:13:50,162
They couldn't afford it
and they were too proud to admit it.
242
00:13:50,247 --> 00:13:51,919
The poor darlings.
243
00:13:52,767 --> 00:13:55,486
They were even too proud
to accept our lovely gift.
244
00:13:56,127 --> 00:13:58,516
That must really have broken their hearts.
245
00:13:58,887 --> 00:14:01,560
Let's send it over to their home.
We'll have Lurch deliver it.
246
00:14:01,647 --> 00:14:04,241
Hey, wait a minute.
Why don't you ask me?
247
00:14:04,927 --> 00:14:07,202
Excellent idea, Fester. You deliver it.
248
00:14:07,607 --> 00:14:11,122
No, I meant, ask me
whether I happen to want it.
249
00:14:11,207 --> 00:14:13,038
Why, of course you do.
250
00:14:13,567 --> 00:14:16,525
But that's the only kind of gift
that's worth giving.
251
00:14:16,967 --> 00:14:19,162
Something that means something to you.
252
00:14:22,527 --> 00:14:25,883
I don't like giving away
precious family heirlooms.
253
00:14:28,127 --> 00:14:30,357
Lurch, get the car.
254
00:14:30,447 --> 00:14:32,961
We'll take something else
over there instead.
255
00:14:33,047 --> 00:14:35,800
Some of that junky furniture
we got up in the attic.
256
00:14:37,047 --> 00:14:40,084
Antique Sheraton sideboard
they stuck up there.
257
00:14:42,207 --> 00:14:45,404
I know it's awful, but, you know,
beggars can't be choosers.
258
00:14:46,207 --> 00:14:50,359
And the first one that blabs anything
about this to Morticia is a rotten egg.
259
00:14:51,167 --> 00:14:53,556
No, better make that a spoilsport.
260
00:14:54,407 --> 00:14:55,806
I like rotten eggs.
261
00:15:05,407 --> 00:15:06,522
- Hi.
- Wow.
262
00:15:07,167 --> 00:15:08,998
Watch it, Lurch. Narrow there.
263
00:15:09,687 --> 00:15:10,802
What's this?
264
00:15:10,887 --> 00:15:13,606
Just a little housewarming present.
265
00:15:14,367 --> 00:15:18,519
Mrs. Addams thought
you might prefer this to a stuffed vulture.
266
00:15:19,087 --> 00:15:20,645
Prefer it?
267
00:15:21,407 --> 00:15:24,319
Why, isn't that an authentic Sheraton?
268
00:15:25,247 --> 00:15:27,477
- Well...
- Why, that must be priceless!
269
00:15:27,967 --> 00:15:29,605
Well, I think it's worth something.
270
00:15:29,687 --> 00:15:32,440
I must telephone
Mrs. Addams immediately.
271
00:15:32,527 --> 00:15:33,960
No.
272
00:15:34,487 --> 00:15:36,284
He's right. I wouldn't do it.
273
00:15:36,367 --> 00:15:37,880
- Why not?
- Well...
274
00:15:37,967 --> 00:15:42,324
Morticia hates expressions of gratitude.
We'll just give her your message.
275
00:15:42,407 --> 00:15:43,396
Bye!
276
00:15:44,807 --> 00:15:47,640
Thank you. Thank you very much.
277
00:15:56,127 --> 00:15:57,116
Hello?
278
00:15:57,447 --> 00:16:02,123
Mrs. Addams,
your beautiful gift just arrived.
279
00:16:02,727 --> 00:16:05,639
I wanted to fill your home
with things of equal beauty.
280
00:16:06,727 --> 00:16:11,164
Nothing could make me happier,
but we just don't have that kind of money.
281
00:16:11,247 --> 00:16:13,556
Oh, think nothing of the expense, dear.
282
00:16:13,927 --> 00:16:15,997
I have more things than I can use.
283
00:16:17,047 --> 00:16:18,844
How can I ever thank you?
284
00:16:19,207 --> 00:16:21,243
It's I who should be thanking you
285
00:16:21,327 --> 00:16:24,797
for letting me do my part
in the national beautification program.
286
00:16:26,287 --> 00:16:27,959
Well, whatever you say.
287
00:16:28,047 --> 00:16:29,878
Joe and I are gonna be gone for a month
288
00:16:29,967 --> 00:16:32,845
and we won't be in your way,
the whole house is yours.
289
00:16:32,927 --> 00:16:37,079
Oh, I know after that lovely gift
you sent over, you're gonna surprise me.
290
00:16:37,167 --> 00:16:39,476
Oh, I will. I will.
291
00:16:40,487 --> 00:16:43,399
- Have a good trip, dear.
- Thank you. Thank you.
292
00:16:48,087 --> 00:16:52,239
Darling, I have decided to let
Mrs. Addams do our new house after all.
293
00:16:56,127 --> 00:16:57,446
Who are you calling?
294
00:16:57,527 --> 00:17:01,406
Either a divorce lawyer or a psychiatrist,
whichever one can get here first.
295
00:17:02,767 --> 00:17:05,600
Mrs. Addams was just having
her little joke.
296
00:17:05,687 --> 00:17:08,042
Little joke, eh? What makes you think so?
297
00:17:10,527 --> 00:17:13,644
- That's what makes me think so.
- Oh.
298
00:17:15,007 --> 00:17:17,999
- A housewarming gift from the Addams.
- Well...
299
00:17:23,407 --> 00:17:24,965
Gomez, darling.
300
00:17:25,887 --> 00:17:28,879
I've had an inspiration
for the new Digby house.
301
00:17:29,367 --> 00:17:31,005
Those lucky devils.
302
00:17:32,247 --> 00:17:33,726
What is it this time?
303
00:17:34,127 --> 00:17:37,278
I want to bring the garden
right into the living room.
304
00:17:38,687 --> 00:17:41,963
- Glass walls, eh?
- No, dirt floor.
305
00:17:47,407 --> 00:17:49,363
There you are, Gomez.
306
00:17:49,447 --> 00:17:53,884
Darling, I've just had the most
marvelous idea about the Digby house.
307
00:17:53,967 --> 00:17:56,356
You know,
those big bay windows in the library,
308
00:17:56,447 --> 00:17:59,166
I'm going to have them all cemented in,
walled up.
309
00:17:59,247 --> 00:18:00,839
You think they'll like that?
310
00:18:00,927 --> 00:18:03,395
Mrs. Digby will. No window washing.
311
00:18:07,967 --> 00:18:11,960
Gomez, darling,
you're going to be so proud of me.
312
00:18:12,047 --> 00:18:16,120
I have an idea for the Digby house
that will be my piece de résistance.
313
00:18:17,767 --> 00:18:18,756
French.
314
00:18:19,487 --> 00:18:23,082
Darling, please, later.
Let me tell you my idea first.
315
00:18:23,167 --> 00:18:26,204
- Let me tell you mine.
- Mine comes first.
316
00:18:27,087 --> 00:18:28,520
Oh, that idea.
317
00:18:29,167 --> 00:18:32,842
Now, darling, what is
the most wasted space in a house?
318
00:18:34,207 --> 00:18:36,960
- The ceiling.
- No, dear, the cellar.
319
00:18:37,287 --> 00:18:39,482
- Of course.
- I've solved it.
320
00:18:39,567 --> 00:18:42,161
I've had Lurch go over to the Digbys'
and flood it.
321
00:18:42,247 --> 00:18:43,965
- Flood it?
- An indoor swimming pool.
322
00:18:44,047 --> 00:18:47,005
Tish, you've done it!
The model American home.
323
00:18:47,087 --> 00:18:49,157
Not yet. There's still the landscaping.
324
00:18:49,247 --> 00:18:50,441
Yes, the landscaping.
325
00:18:50,527 --> 00:18:52,961
Darling, I want you to see this
with your own eyes.
326
00:18:54,767 --> 00:18:56,246
Would you believe it?
327
00:18:56,327 --> 00:19:02,243
That garden used to be full of roses
and geraniums and unsightly camellias,
328
00:19:02,327 --> 00:19:05,876
and, in just one week, Lurch and I did that.
329
00:19:15,687 --> 00:19:18,485
- That's a miracle.
- Thank you, darling.
330
00:19:18,567 --> 00:19:20,205
Beautiful touch, my dear.
331
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:23,522
Well, when Mrs. Digby sees all this,
332
00:19:24,247 --> 00:19:26,203
I'll have the smelling salts ready.
333
00:19:28,127 --> 00:19:30,846
Darling, there's a car driving up.
It must be the Digbys.
334
00:19:37,527 --> 00:19:38,676
Welcome home.
335
00:19:39,207 --> 00:19:41,198
Digbys! Welcome home.
336
00:19:50,367 --> 00:19:53,518
Well, what do you two think
of your little love nest now?
337
00:19:58,047 --> 00:19:59,480
What did I tell you?
338
00:20:04,967 --> 00:20:06,559
Excellent idea, my dear.
339
00:20:06,647 --> 00:20:10,276
To leave the Digbys in private
to savor the beauty of their new home.
340
00:20:10,527 --> 00:20:13,803
I do hope it didn't take
Mr. Digby too long to revive her.
341
00:20:13,887 --> 00:20:15,957
He must be an old hand at it by now.
342
00:20:18,167 --> 00:20:20,237
- Are you expecting anyone, dear?
- I certainly am.
343
00:20:20,327 --> 00:20:23,239
A whole parade of people
on the Digbys' recommendation.
344
00:20:28,087 --> 00:20:30,043
The Digbys.
345
00:20:35,367 --> 00:20:38,165
- Mrs. Addams...
- Please, say no more.
346
00:20:38,247 --> 00:20:40,078
I can read your feelings on your face.
347
00:20:40,167 --> 00:20:43,637
Mrs. Addams, I can understand
some of the things you did to my house,
348
00:20:43,727 --> 00:20:44,762
but why?
349
00:20:44,847 --> 00:20:48,157
Why a wrecked car right smack
in the middle of the living room?
350
00:20:48,847 --> 00:20:50,565
I knew that would get them.
351
00:20:50,767 --> 00:20:55,477
You see, I feel that a person's home
should reflect their personality.
352
00:20:55,887 --> 00:20:57,161
A wrecked car?
353
00:20:57,247 --> 00:20:59,841
Well, that reflects
your husband's work in insurance.
354
00:21:00,927 --> 00:21:01,996
Pretty clever.
355
00:21:02,087 --> 00:21:04,601
Did you notice the crushed fenders?
356
00:21:05,247 --> 00:21:07,078
That is the original rust on them.
357
00:21:09,087 --> 00:21:11,521
- I think I'm gonna faint again.
- Could you hold it a moment, please?
358
00:21:11,607 --> 00:21:12,722
We have a small favor to ask.
359
00:21:12,807 --> 00:21:15,560
Well, I have a bigger favor.
You can take all that stuff...
360
00:21:15,647 --> 00:21:17,603
But that's just the favor
we were going to ask you.
361
00:21:17,687 --> 00:21:20,121
You can take all that... That...
362
00:21:20,207 --> 00:21:22,038
That was the favor
you were gonna ask us?
363
00:21:22,127 --> 00:21:25,403
Well, it's more in the nature
of a sacrifice for your country.
364
00:21:25,847 --> 00:21:29,522
You see,
we want to make your home a showplace.
365
00:21:29,607 --> 00:21:31,120
Open it to the public.
366
00:21:32,007 --> 00:21:34,840
It's all part
of the national beautification program.
367
00:21:35,767 --> 00:21:38,327
Of course,
we insist on your having a profit.
368
00:21:39,127 --> 00:21:42,358
Please, please, anything you say.
It's a deal.
369
00:21:43,967 --> 00:21:46,037
Real Americans, eh, darling?
370
00:21:47,527 --> 00:21:51,486
And if there's anything you'd like to keep,
why, I'm sure we can replace it.
371
00:21:51,887 --> 00:21:56,915
Oh, well, now, there was just one piece.
I don't know what happened to it.
372
00:21:57,007 --> 00:21:59,475
It was a Sheraton sideboard.
373
00:22:00,567 --> 00:22:01,556
Oh, that.
374
00:22:01,967 --> 00:22:03,605
It was obviously a mistake.
375
00:22:04,687 --> 00:22:05,915
You like that?
376
00:22:06,367 --> 00:22:08,927
I thought it was rather,
you know, amusing.
377
00:22:09,007 --> 00:22:12,079
- Say no more. We have a whole atticful.
- It's all yours.
378
00:22:12,447 --> 00:22:15,678
Now, now we can really get to work
on your new home.
379
00:22:18,607 --> 00:22:19,926
Just a minute.
380
00:22:20,007 --> 00:22:23,158
- You see, we're planning on leaving town.
- Oh, yeah.
381
00:22:23,247 --> 00:22:25,203
Well, perhaps I can be of some assistance.
382
00:22:25,287 --> 00:22:28,245
- Gomez has interests all over the world.
- He has?
383
00:22:29,527 --> 00:22:32,678
Well, there must be one place
he doesn't have any interests.
384
00:22:32,967 --> 00:22:34,958
Come to think of it there is one.
385
00:22:35,127 --> 00:22:36,355
Timbuktu.
386
00:22:38,327 --> 00:22:40,921
Funny thing
you should mention Timbuktu.
387
00:22:41,007 --> 00:22:42,804
That's just where we're going.
388
00:22:43,967 --> 00:22:45,639
Isn't that strange?
389
00:22:58,007 --> 00:22:59,235
Gomez, darling.
390
00:22:59,927 --> 00:23:04,125
Does it strike you as odd that nobody
has been inside my model home?
391
00:23:06,127 --> 00:23:08,482
They just glance in the door and walk on.
392
00:23:08,887 --> 00:23:11,606
Well, the house is obviously
too far ahead of its time.
393
00:23:12,967 --> 00:23:15,276
Frank Lloyd Wright had the same problem.
394
00:23:15,967 --> 00:23:18,481
I don't even think
the Digbys appreciated it.
395
00:23:21,207 --> 00:23:23,323
- Nice people, but a bit crude.
- Yes.
396
00:23:23,927 --> 00:23:26,919
That Sheraton sideboard
was a dead giveaway.
397
00:23:27,007 --> 00:23:30,602
At least they helped us clean
the rest of the stuff out of the attic.
398
00:23:34,967 --> 00:23:37,527
What's the matter, darling?
No more sword swallowing?
399
00:23:37,607 --> 00:23:41,361
The thought of that Digby house
in Timbuktu ruined my appetite.