1 00:00:01,525 --> 00:00:02,587 You're wrong. 2 00:00:02,712 --> 00:00:05,203 Wolverine was not born with bone claws. 3 00:00:05,965 --> 00:00:07,517 You know me to be a very smart man. 4 00:00:07,642 --> 00:00:10,388 Don't you think if I were wrong, I'd know it? 5 00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:13,343 - First of all... - Give it up, dude. 6 00:00:13,468 --> 00:00:15,295 You're arguing with a crazy person. 7 00:00:16,274 --> 00:00:18,935 I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested. 8 00:00:21,565 --> 00:00:24,273 - What are you doing here? - What? It's new comic book night. 9 00:00:24,442 --> 00:00:26,074 Since you and Penny finally hooked up, 10 00:00:26,199 --> 00:00:29,599 we thought you two would be having bouncy naked yum-yum night. 11 00:00:30,987 --> 00:00:32,782 There's more to life than sex, Raj. 12 00:00:32,951 --> 00:00:35,275 Who had "Leonard flames out with Penny in less than 24 hours"? 13 00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:36,400 I did. 14 00:00:37,589 --> 00:00:38,836 Nothing flamed out. 15 00:00:38,961 --> 00:00:40,873 We don't have to have sex every night, you know. 16 00:00:41,043 --> 00:00:43,887 You don't have to, but it's highly recommended. 17 00:00:44,965 --> 00:00:47,140 Yeah, take advantage of that window of opportunity 18 00:00:47,265 --> 00:00:49,612 before it slams shut on your little dinky. 19 00:00:50,884 --> 00:00:52,412 It's not a matter of opportunity. 20 00:00:52,537 --> 00:00:55,304 We're getting to know each other. There's a learning curve. 21 00:00:55,473 --> 00:00:57,903 What's there to learn? You get naked, do nasty things, 22 00:00:58,028 --> 00:00:59,913 then somebody makes scrambled eggs and salami. 23 00:01:00,038 --> 00:01:01,060 Easy peasy. 24 00:01:01,901 --> 00:01:04,105 Perhaps what Leonard is oblique referring to 25 00:01:04,230 --> 00:01:06,482 is the occurrence of some sort of sexual dysfunction. 26 00:01:07,030 --> 00:01:09,280 Who had "Leonard gets a floppy disk"? 27 00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,440 A clever... albeit obsolete, euphemism 28 00:01:12,565 --> 00:01:15,108 for insufficient blood flow the male sex organ. 29 00:01:17,594 --> 00:01:19,399 Nothing like that happened, all right? 30 00:01:19,524 --> 00:01:21,539 The sex was... just fine. 31 00:01:22,157 --> 00:01:23,502 Just fine? 32 00:01:23,780 --> 00:01:26,750 Dude, the fourth Harry Potter movie was "just fine. " 33 00:01:28,154 --> 00:01:29,530 I'm not saying it was bad. 34 00:01:29,655 --> 00:01:32,206 I'm just saying it... wasn't great. 35 00:01:32,510 --> 00:01:34,133 Do you mean for both of you? 36 00:01:34,258 --> 00:01:36,354 Because we can totally see it not being great for her. 37 00:01:36,479 --> 00:01:37,479 Oh, yeah. 38 00:01:38,718 --> 00:01:42,017 To tell you the truth, I think we were both... I don't know... 39 00:01:42,187 --> 00:01:43,413 Disappointed? Let down? 40 00:01:43,538 --> 00:01:45,246 Ashamed? Horrified? Repulsed? 41 00:01:46,157 --> 00:01:48,816 All I know is, it wasn't the way I dreamed it would be. 42 00:01:49,656 --> 00:01:52,356 Sex is never the way I dream it's gonna be. 43 00:01:54,656 --> 00:01:57,557 That's because in your dreams, you're a horse from the waist down. 44 00:01:59,789 --> 00:02:02,288 Excuse me, Wolverine: Origin. 45 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:05,159 Miniseries issue two, page 22. 46 00:02:05,284 --> 00:02:07,378 Retractable bone claws. 47 00:02:07,569 --> 00:02:09,523 If you people spent less time thinking about sex 48 00:02:09,648 --> 00:02:11,572 and more time concentrating on comic books, 49 00:02:11,697 --> 00:02:13,674 we'd have far fewer of these embarrassing moments. 50 00:02:17,179 --> 00:02:19,221 Episode 302: The Jiminy Conjecture 51 00:02:20,805 --> 00:02:22,612 Sync: Jess, Golgi, Loky 52 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,277 www.subbercafe.fr 53 00:02:42,833 --> 00:02:44,341 Sheldon, dinner's here. 54 00:02:44,515 --> 00:02:45,945 Tandoori Palace? 55 00:02:46,070 --> 00:02:47,500 No, we went somewhere new. 56 00:02:51,370 --> 00:02:53,838 You're good naturedly ribbing me, aren't you? 57 00:02:54,439 --> 00:02:55,966 No, look, Mumbai Palace. 58 00:02:56,244 --> 00:02:57,336 Why? 59 00:02:57,461 --> 00:02:58,817 Why would we change? 60 00:02:58,942 --> 00:03:02,397 We had a perfectly good palace. Tandoori Palace is our palace. 61 00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:05,859 Trust me, this will be just fine. 62 00:03:06,273 --> 00:03:08,949 You are the authority on "just fine. " 63 00:03:11,210 --> 00:03:12,828 What's that supposed to mean? 64 00:03:13,620 --> 00:03:16,359 Yeah, exactly. "Not bad, but not great". 65 00:03:19,020 --> 00:03:20,945 - What are they talking about? - I don't know. 66 00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:22,868 I know. As I'm sure you're aware... 67 00:03:25,146 --> 00:03:27,331 If that's Morse code, that's terrible. 68 00:03:28,834 --> 00:03:31,543 As I was saying, you and Leonard had a disappointing sexual encounter. 69 00:03:31,835 --> 00:03:34,835 Earlier this evening, Leonard characterized it as "just fine." 70 00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:38,193 So you're seeing a continuation of the mocking that followed. 71 00:03:41,558 --> 00:03:44,212 Okay, yeah, I'm just gonna go eat my dinner elsewhere. 72 00:03:44,337 --> 00:03:47,087 Maybe an airplane headed for a mountainside. 73 00:03:48,087 --> 00:03:49,187 Penny, wait. 74 00:03:51,214 --> 00:03:52,864 What is wrong with you? 75 00:03:56,651 --> 00:03:59,351 I sense I may have crossed some sort of line. 76 00:04:00,839 --> 00:04:02,989 - Yeah, you... - No, don't tell him. 77 00:04:03,370 --> 00:04:05,540 Let's see if he can figure it out. 78 00:04:11,212 --> 00:04:13,544 - I am so embarrassed! - Please don't be mad. 79 00:04:13,712 --> 00:04:15,709 - What did you tell them? - Nothing bad. 80 00:04:15,834 --> 00:04:17,673 Just that last night was fine. 81 00:04:17,962 --> 00:04:20,050 Fine? You said it was fine? 82 00:04:20,220 --> 00:04:22,028 Yeah, it's a perfectly good word. 83 00:04:22,153 --> 00:04:24,215 You put it in front of "wine" or "dining," 84 00:04:24,340 --> 00:04:26,431 and you've really got something. 85 00:04:30,215 --> 00:04:32,315 Okay, well, let me ask you this: 86 00:04:33,030 --> 00:04:34,565 how was last night for you? 87 00:04:35,447 --> 00:04:38,116 It was... okay. 88 00:04:39,151 --> 00:04:40,151 Okay? 89 00:04:41,027 --> 00:04:42,715 Yeah, it's a perfectly good word. 90 00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:44,777 I mean, you put it in front of "dokay" 91 00:04:44,902 --> 00:04:46,702 and you really got something. 92 00:04:48,155 --> 00:04:49,665 All right, let's not overreact. 93 00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:52,660 For a lot of couples, it takes time to get to know each other's rhythms. 94 00:04:52,785 --> 00:04:54,752 Learn what the other person wants and likes. 95 00:04:55,215 --> 00:04:56,754 So, you've been through this before? 96 00:05:00,279 --> 00:05:01,573 Okay-dokay. 97 00:05:03,779 --> 00:05:05,249 I think it's one of those things 98 00:05:05,374 --> 00:05:07,348 where talking about it isn't gonna make it better. 99 00:05:07,779 --> 00:05:09,777 - Want a glass of wine? - So much. 100 00:05:11,211 --> 00:05:13,260 See, we should've done this last night. 101 00:05:13,385 --> 00:05:15,564 Have a little wine, take the edge off. 102 00:05:15,733 --> 00:05:19,460 Actually, ethyl alcohol inhibits electrical conduction in the nerve cells 103 00:05:19,585 --> 00:05:23,030 and stimulates reuptake receptors of inhibitory neurotramitters 104 00:05:23,199 --> 00:05:25,000 like gamma-aminobutyric acid. 105 00:05:29,282 --> 00:05:31,096 Don't talk, just drink. 106 00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:35,535 No, you're misunderstanding. 107 00:05:35,660 --> 00:05:38,260 A Shiksa Goddess isn't an actual goddess. 108 00:05:40,096 --> 00:05:41,535 And we don't pray to them. 109 00:05:41,660 --> 00:05:42,960 We prey on them. 110 00:05:44,999 --> 00:05:48,106 Whatever, dude. The point is, Leonard's got one and you don't. 111 00:05:49,059 --> 00:05:50,222 Is this it? 112 00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:53,423 It was inappropriate to discuss Leonard and Penny's sex life 113 00:05:53,548 --> 00:05:55,020 in front of Leonard and Penny. 114 00:05:56,648 --> 00:05:57,655 Good! 115 00:06:00,445 --> 00:06:01,763 Now I can eat. 116 00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:09,410 What's that? 117 00:06:09,909 --> 00:06:12,209 - Sounds like a cricket. - Hang on. 118 00:06:16,661 --> 00:06:19,408 Based on the number of chirps per minute and the ambient temperature, 119 00:06:19,533 --> 00:06:21,383 it is a snowy tree cricket. 120 00:06:23,634 --> 00:06:24,971 Give me a freakin' break. 121 00:06:25,096 --> 00:06:27,099 How could you possibly know that? 122 00:06:27,514 --> 00:06:28,929 In 1890, Emile Dolbear 123 00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:30,775 determined that there was a relationship 124 00:06:30,900 --> 00:06:33,319 between the number of chirps per minute of the snowy tree cricket 125 00:06:33,444 --> 00:06:34,623 and the temperature. 126 00:06:34,748 --> 00:06:38,014 A precise relationship that is not present with ordinary field crickets. 127 00:06:38,582 --> 00:06:40,774 How do you know what the exact temperature of the room is? 128 00:06:40,944 --> 00:06:42,676 Under the terms of my roommate agreement, 129 00:06:42,801 --> 00:06:44,665 I've had unilateral control of the thermostat 130 00:06:44,790 --> 00:06:46,660 ever since the sweaty night of '06. 131 00:06:48,753 --> 00:06:51,668 You were right about Wolverine and bone claws, 132 00:06:51,793 --> 00:06:53,633 but you're wrong about the cricket. 133 00:06:53,758 --> 00:06:55,584 Howard, don't embarrass yourself. 134 00:06:55,709 --> 00:06:57,585 The science chirps for itself. 135 00:06:59,146 --> 00:07:00,656 Humorous word play. 136 00:07:02,336 --> 00:07:04,590 No, no, not this time. I know insects, my friend. 137 00:07:04,954 --> 00:07:07,707 I spent many childhood years capturing them with nets, 138 00:07:07,832 --> 00:07:09,947 putting them in glass jars, sticking pins through them, 139 00:07:10,072 --> 00:07:12,514 mounting them on corrugated cardboard with Dymo labels underneath, 140 00:07:12,639 --> 00:07:14,999 identifying the genus and species. 141 00:07:15,980 --> 00:07:16,980 In Latin. 142 00:07:20,072 --> 00:07:22,872 Dude, you are never getting a shiksa goddess. 143 00:07:26,816 --> 00:07:28,585 That is a snowy tree cricket. 144 00:07:28,710 --> 00:07:29,948 Oecanthus fultoni. 145 00:07:30,319 --> 00:07:32,719 I was done with Latin by fifth grade. 146 00:07:33,778 --> 00:07:34,946 Okay, tell you what. 147 00:07:35,071 --> 00:07:38,081 I am willing to bet anything that's an ordinary field cricket. 148 00:07:38,368 --> 00:07:40,165 I can't take your money. 149 00:07:40,877 --> 00:07:41,877 You chicken? 150 00:07:42,334 --> 00:07:44,755 I've always found that an inappropriate slur. 151 00:07:44,923 --> 00:07:46,967 Chickens are not, by nature, at all timid. 152 00:07:47,092 --> 00:07:50,152 In fact, when I was young, my neighbor's chicken got loose 153 00:07:50,277 --> 00:07:53,138 and chased me up the big elm tree in front of our house. 154 00:07:55,844 --> 00:07:58,060 - Chickens can't climb trees. - Thank God. 155 00:08:01,651 --> 00:08:03,482 I believe a chicken made you his bitch. 156 00:08:05,554 --> 00:08:07,820 But the cricket thing, I don't buy. Bet me. 157 00:08:08,883 --> 00:08:09,983 Fair enough. 158 00:08:10,342 --> 00:08:12,374 What stakes do you propose? 159 00:08:13,820 --> 00:08:16,389 I will put up my Fantastic Four number 48, 160 00:08:16,514 --> 00:08:18,466 first appearance of Silver Surfer 161 00:08:18,591 --> 00:08:22,251 against your Flash 123, the classic Flash of two worlds issue. 162 00:08:23,779 --> 00:08:25,379 All right, you have a wager. 163 00:08:27,275 --> 00:08:29,626 Great. Now how are you going to settle it? 164 00:08:29,751 --> 00:08:33,011 There is no way to determine the species of the cricket without examining it. 165 00:08:42,316 --> 00:08:45,148 I wonder what the non-pathetic people are doing tonight. 166 00:08:58,030 --> 00:08:59,480 - More wine? - Hit me. 167 00:09:06,085 --> 00:09:07,635 I don't see anything. 168 00:09:14,294 --> 00:09:15,294 Hallway. 169 00:09:20,074 --> 00:09:21,274 One at a time. 170 00:09:34,346 --> 00:09:35,546 What was that? 171 00:09:36,032 --> 00:09:37,032 My stomach. 172 00:09:38,375 --> 00:09:39,870 Indian food doesn't agree with me. 173 00:09:43,137 --> 00:09:44,291 Ironic, isn't it? 174 00:09:48,888 --> 00:09:50,138 Elevator shaft. 175 00:09:54,700 --> 00:09:55,928 Help me open it. 176 00:09:56,282 --> 00:09:59,473 Are you crazy? We can't go down an empty elevator shaft. 177 00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:02,433 Fine, if you don't want to proceed, then you forfeit the bet, 178 00:10:02,558 --> 00:10:04,561 and I'll take possession of your Fantastic Four. 179 00:10:06,389 --> 00:10:07,789 Let's open her up. 180 00:10:09,366 --> 00:10:12,210 Are you bothered that I can so easily manipulate you? 181 00:10:12,335 --> 00:10:13,445 Don't push me. 182 00:10:14,475 --> 00:10:17,207 I may be small, but I took kung fu when I was 13, 183 00:10:17,332 --> 00:10:19,482 and I remember a good deal of it. 184 00:10:20,116 --> 00:10:21,207 Oh, really? 185 00:10:21,332 --> 00:10:24,415 I grew up with an older brother and a very contentious twin sister. 186 00:10:24,583 --> 00:10:27,497 And I believe I could easily best you in any physical confrontation... 187 00:10:27,622 --> 00:10:31,213 be it noogies, swirlies or the classic "Why are you hitting yourself?" 188 00:10:34,270 --> 00:10:37,511 Big talk from a man who was once treed by a chicken. 189 00:10:46,895 --> 00:10:48,439 What are we drinking now? 190 00:10:48,834 --> 00:10:50,334 Peppermint schnapps. 191 00:10:52,559 --> 00:10:54,611 Why would you buy peppermint schnapps? 192 00:10:54,831 --> 00:10:56,631 Because I like peppermint, 193 00:10:56,771 --> 00:10:58,721 and it's fun to say schnapps. 194 00:11:03,009 --> 00:11:04,496 - Hey, Leonard? - What? 195 00:11:04,824 --> 00:11:05,960 Schnapps. 196 00:11:08,335 --> 00:11:09,335 Schnapps. 197 00:11:09,981 --> 00:11:11,781 You're right, that is fun. 198 00:11:15,022 --> 00:11:16,118 Be careful. 199 00:11:16,525 --> 00:11:18,147 If I were not being careful, 200 00:11:18,272 --> 00:11:20,888 your telling me to be careful would not make me careful. 201 00:11:26,148 --> 00:11:27,148 Stairwell. 202 00:11:29,213 --> 00:11:31,913 Flashlight went out. I need some batteries. 203 00:11:33,460 --> 00:11:34,460 Fellas? 204 00:11:37,027 --> 00:11:38,027 Hello? 205 00:11:40,898 --> 00:11:42,748 It's really dark down here. 206 00:11:47,774 --> 00:11:49,533 Oh, sweetie. 207 00:11:49,658 --> 00:11:53,056 You really can't hold your liquor, can you? 208 00:11:54,258 --> 00:11:55,340 I'm okay. 209 00:11:55,527 --> 00:11:59,361 Just a little mouthwash, and then I'm gonna rock your world. 210 00:12:06,343 --> 00:12:07,493 Are you okay? 211 00:12:15,807 --> 00:12:19,787 Toby, what did you do in a past life to be so disgusting now? 212 00:12:21,255 --> 00:12:22,782 His name isn't Toby. 213 00:12:23,129 --> 00:12:25,076 Toby is an absurd name for a cricket. 214 00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:27,916 - What would you name him? - An appropriate cricket name. 215 00:12:28,041 --> 00:12:29,541 For example, Jiminy. 216 00:12:31,669 --> 00:12:33,044 All right, here we go. 217 00:12:33,169 --> 00:12:35,504 Kleingast's Field Guide to North American Insects. 218 00:12:38,589 --> 00:12:40,759 Right here. See it? 219 00:12:41,051 --> 00:12:43,164 The common field cricket, AKA Gryllus assimilis, 220 00:12:43,289 --> 00:12:45,839 which is Latin for "suck it, you lose. " 221 00:12:46,165 --> 00:12:47,165 Hang on. 222 00:12:48,603 --> 00:12:49,419 Voilą. 223 00:12:49,544 --> 00:12:52,791 The snowy tree cricket. AKA Oecanthus fultoni, 224 00:12:52,916 --> 00:12:55,023 which is Latin for I'll suck nothing. 225 00:12:55,810 --> 00:12:59,027 Of course I'm joking because the Latin for that is nihil exsorbibo. 226 00:12:59,524 --> 00:13:01,211 That is not Toby, 227 00:13:01,698 --> 00:13:02,656 this is Toby. 228 00:13:02,967 --> 00:13:04,366 Raj, what do you think? 229 00:13:05,418 --> 00:13:07,202 I really don't care anymore. 230 00:13:09,709 --> 00:13:12,624 - God, I had the most horrible night. - What happened? 231 00:13:12,909 --> 00:13:16,019 Obviously another carnal fiasco with the shiksi goddess. 232 00:13:17,363 --> 00:13:18,463 Shiksa. Shik-sa. 233 00:13:19,086 --> 00:13:22,086 Forgive me. Yiddish was not spoken in east Texas. 234 00:13:23,082 --> 00:13:25,682 And if it was, it wasn't spoken for long. 235 00:13:26,435 --> 00:13:29,182 Yeah, fine, whatever. The point is, you're wrong again. 236 00:13:29,461 --> 00:13:31,643 We haven't established that I'm wrong once. All right. 237 00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,525 Let's go down to the Entomology Department 238 00:13:34,650 --> 00:13:37,607 and let Professor Crawley tell us what kind of cricket Toby is. 239 00:13:37,777 --> 00:13:40,568 He's a snowy tree cricket, and his name is Jiminy. 240 00:13:42,198 --> 00:13:46,074 I bet I could throw a rock in this room and come up with three better friends. 241 00:13:54,181 --> 00:13:55,502 Holy crap. 242 00:14:00,409 --> 00:14:03,159 It's like The silence of the lambsdown here. 243 00:14:08,603 --> 00:14:09,806 Don't do that! 244 00:14:11,128 --> 00:14:12,892 You're such a girl. They're just bugs. 245 00:14:13,350 --> 00:14:15,685 Well, I don't like bugs, okay? They freak me out. 246 00:14:15,810 --> 00:14:19,190 Interesting. You're afraid of insects and women. 247 00:14:19,534 --> 00:14:21,784 Ladybugs must render you catatonic. 248 00:14:25,066 --> 00:14:26,266 It was a joke. 249 00:14:27,721 --> 00:14:29,784 I made it to lessen your discomfort. 250 00:14:31,308 --> 00:14:32,412 You're welcome. 251 00:14:38,310 --> 00:14:40,282 Don't knock. Just walk in. 252 00:14:40,407 --> 00:14:44,107 Why be polite to the world's leading expert on the dung beetle? 253 00:14:45,766 --> 00:14:48,428 Excuse me, are you professor Crawley? 254 00:14:49,159 --> 00:14:50,513 Who wants to know? 255 00:14:51,845 --> 00:14:53,975 I'm Dr. Cooper from the physics department. 256 00:14:54,283 --> 00:14:55,518 Couldn't wait, huh? 257 00:14:55,754 --> 00:14:58,241 - I'm sorry? - I haven't even packed yet, 258 00:14:58,366 --> 00:15:00,643 and you're already measuring my lab 259 00:15:00,768 --> 00:15:03,268 for one of your godless laser machines. 260 00:15:05,208 --> 00:15:08,156 No, you don't understand. We just want to ask you a question. 261 00:15:09,306 --> 00:15:11,056 Let me ask you one first. 262 00:15:11,409 --> 00:15:14,345 What's a world renowned entomologist with a doctorate 263 00:15:14,470 --> 00:15:17,439 and 20 years of experience to do with his life 264 00:15:17,564 --> 00:15:20,960 when the university cuts off the funding for his lab, huh? 265 00:15:21,799 --> 00:15:24,822 Ask rhetorical questions that make people uncomfortable? 266 00:15:29,163 --> 00:15:30,345 What's your deal? 267 00:15:30,596 --> 00:15:34,006 Are they planning to outsource my job to Bangalore? 268 00:15:36,719 --> 00:15:38,103 I'm from New Delhi. 269 00:15:38,906 --> 00:15:41,934 - You should find another entomologist. - No. We're here. Let's settle this. 270 00:15:42,059 --> 00:15:44,693 Professor, can you identify our cricket? 271 00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:46,132 Of course I can. 272 00:15:46,257 --> 00:15:49,823 I can identify every insect and arachnid on the planet. 273 00:15:50,437 --> 00:15:54,441 Not that that's going to keep me from moving in with my daughter in Oxnard. 274 00:15:54,789 --> 00:15:58,623 And we're not talking Oxnard at the beach. No! 275 00:15:59,006 --> 00:16:02,060 We're talking Oxnard in the onion fields. 276 00:16:06,889 --> 00:16:08,174 Could you look at Toby? 277 00:16:08,634 --> 00:16:09,634 Toby? 278 00:16:11,388 --> 00:16:13,538 What a stupid name for a cricket. 279 00:16:15,304 --> 00:16:16,307 Told ya. 280 00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:21,604 - It's a field cricket. - No, wait. Dr. Crawley, are you sure? 281 00:16:21,874 --> 00:16:25,400 Young man, I've been studying insects since I was eight years old. 282 00:16:25,936 --> 00:16:28,193 You know what they used to call me in school? 283 00:16:28,750 --> 00:16:30,000 Creepy Crawley. 284 00:16:31,453 --> 00:16:34,242 Cruel as that may be, that is not in itself a credential. 285 00:16:36,376 --> 00:16:38,176 Let me show you something. 286 00:16:38,688 --> 00:16:41,458 See that? That's a Crawley's dung beetle. 287 00:16:41,812 --> 00:16:44,312 I discovered it after spending six months slogging 288 00:16:44,437 --> 00:16:46,129 through the Bornean rain forest, 289 00:16:46,875 --> 00:16:48,673 while my wife was back home 290 00:16:48,843 --> 00:16:51,405 shacking up with a two-bit ornithologist 291 00:16:51,530 --> 00:16:53,180 who lives on a sailboat 292 00:16:53,438 --> 00:16:55,638 and likes to wear boot-cut jeans! 293 00:16:57,505 --> 00:16:59,153 So, when I tell you 294 00:16:59,278 --> 00:17:01,903 that that's a common field cricket, 295 00:17:02,028 --> 00:17:04,272 you can take that to the damn bank! 296 00:17:04,620 --> 00:17:06,065 Cause God knows I can't! 297 00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:08,818 That tramp took me for everything! 298 00:17:15,064 --> 00:17:17,064 Well, apparently, I was wrong. 299 00:17:18,410 --> 00:17:19,710 Congratulations. 300 00:17:26,089 --> 00:17:27,128 Enjoy Oxnard. 301 00:17:29,090 --> 00:17:31,549 I'm sure your daughter's looking forward to having you. 302 00:17:40,254 --> 00:17:41,810 What you got? A new comic book? 303 00:17:41,983 --> 00:17:43,356 Old comic book. 304 00:17:44,309 --> 00:17:47,109 I just retrieved it from my safe deposit box. 305 00:17:48,070 --> 00:17:49,985 What do you have a safe deposit box for? 306 00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:52,370 Old comic books. 307 00:17:53,877 --> 00:17:57,377 I lost this to Wolowitz in an ill-considered cricket wager. 308 00:17:58,445 --> 00:18:00,745 What, do they have Wii cricket now? 309 00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:04,265 That can't be very popular. 310 00:18:05,201 --> 00:18:06,585 I'd rather not talk about it. 311 00:18:06,895 --> 00:18:09,713 Well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm not feeling so hot either. 312 00:18:11,443 --> 00:18:13,341 Why would that make me feel better? 313 00:18:14,632 --> 00:18:15,886 I don't know, empathy? 314 00:18:20,662 --> 00:18:21,944 Anyway, I'm just saying, 315 00:18:22,069 --> 00:18:24,368 that you're feeling upset about something with Howard, 316 00:18:24,493 --> 00:18:25,854 and me, with Leonard. 317 00:18:26,180 --> 00:18:28,023 Yes, the disappointing sex. 318 00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:30,761 That's an inexact parallel. 319 00:18:30,886 --> 00:18:33,361 You and Leonard can always return to being friends, 320 00:18:33,694 --> 00:18:35,442 whereas I can never return to a state 321 00:18:35,567 --> 00:18:38,813 in which Wolowitz has not bested me like Mrs. Riley's chicken. 322 00:18:40,260 --> 00:18:41,870 What's Mrs. Riley's chicken? 323 00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:45,539 A chicken that was owned by Mrs. Riley. 324 00:18:46,569 --> 00:18:49,044 - Okay, forget the chicken. - I wish I could. 325 00:18:51,705 --> 00:18:53,673 You may be right about me and Leonard. 326 00:18:53,973 --> 00:18:55,192 Of course I'm right. 327 00:18:55,317 --> 00:18:57,844 What are the odds I'd be wrong twice in one week? 328 00:18:58,473 --> 00:19:00,788 No, I mean, we can always go back to being friends. 329 00:19:00,913 --> 00:19:02,209 I just said that. 330 00:19:02,334 --> 00:19:04,726 This conversation has started to circle. Meeting adjourned. 331 00:19:12,284 --> 00:19:13,584 What's going on? 332 00:19:15,189 --> 00:19:17,929 You'd like to catch up on the events of the day. All right. 333 00:19:18,721 --> 00:19:21,658 There was a half-hour wait at the bank to get into my safe deposit box, 334 00:19:21,783 --> 00:19:24,287 I was forced to talk to Penny about your sexual problems, 335 00:19:24,455 --> 00:19:25,747 and, oh, yes, 336 00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:27,887 in a moment filled with biblical resonance, 337 00:19:28,012 --> 00:19:29,785 pride wenteth before my fall, 338 00:19:29,910 --> 00:19:32,704 causing my Flash 123 to goeth to Wolowitz. 339 00:19:34,383 --> 00:19:37,467 Wait a minute. You talked to Penny about our sex life? 340 00:19:37,712 --> 00:19:39,284 Leonard, it astonishes me 341 00:19:39,409 --> 00:19:41,350 how you continually fixate on the trivial. 342 00:19:41,475 --> 00:19:43,225 I lost a bet to Wolowitz. 343 00:19:45,169 --> 00:19:47,060 Right. You're saying you talked to Penny? 344 00:19:48,674 --> 00:19:50,424 - Interesting. - Hardly. 345 00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:52,229 Excuse me. 346 00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:55,608 - Have I crossed a line again? - Little bit. 347 00:20:03,533 --> 00:20:04,533 Who cares? 348 00:20:11,961 --> 00:20:13,545 What did Sheldon say to you? 349 00:20:13,843 --> 00:20:14,843 Not a lot. 350 00:20:14,968 --> 00:20:17,966 Just that we always have the option of going back to being friends. 351 00:20:19,033 --> 00:20:22,294 - Is that what you want? - I don't know, I mean... 352 00:20:22,641 --> 00:20:25,891 You have to admit things seemed simpler when we were just friends. 353 00:20:26,767 --> 00:20:27,767 I guess. 354 00:20:28,448 --> 00:20:30,063 It would take the pressure off. 355 00:20:30,188 --> 00:20:31,646 It would, wouldn't it? 356 00:20:32,905 --> 00:20:34,705 So, we'll just be friends. 357 00:20:35,481 --> 00:20:36,481 Good. 358 00:20:38,558 --> 00:20:39,558 Come here. 359 00:20:52,783 --> 00:20:53,783 Okay-dokay.