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00:00:00,847 --> 00:00:02,631
Previously on
The Big Bang Theory...
2
00:00:02,737 --> 00:00:05,738
We now pronounce you
husband and wife!
3
00:00:08,937 --> 00:00:11,189
I love this part!
4
00:00:11,191 --> 00:00:12,774
Me, too!
5
00:00:12,776 --> 00:00:16,244
I have strongly mixed feelings!
6
00:00:18,013 --> 00:00:20,998
So, Howard's really
in space, huh?
7
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:22,900
Mm-hmm, International
Space Station.
8
00:00:22,902 --> 00:00:25,002
250 miles that way.
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00:00:25,004 --> 00:00:27,789
Right now, Howard's
staring down at our planet
10
00:00:27,791 --> 00:00:31,342
like a tiny Jewish Greek god.
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00:00:31,344 --> 00:00:34,412
Zeusowitz.
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00:00:34,414 --> 00:00:35,697
I must admit,
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00:00:35,699 --> 00:00:38,249
I can't help
but feel a twinge of envy.
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He can look out the window and
see the majesty of the universe
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unfolding before his eyes.
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His dim, uncomprehending eyes.
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It's like a cat
in an airport carrying case.
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00:00:53,867 --> 00:00:56,951
You know, it's not exactly
glamorous up there.
19
00:00:56,953 --> 00:00:58,986
The water that
the astronauts drink
20
00:00:58,988 --> 00:01:01,539
is made from each other's
recycled urine.
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Must be nice.
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00:01:04,227 --> 00:01:07,128
Nobody wants anything
that comes out of me.
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I wonder what he's
doing right this very second.
24
00:01:14,921 --> 00:01:17,805
Mm, conducting experiments
in zero gravity.
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Peering through his telescope
at the birth of the cosmos.
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Whatever it is, we know his
life will never be the same.
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Howard! Can you hear me?!
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I can hear you
without the phone!
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Don't be snippy.
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I'm just excited to talk
to my baby!
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I'm excited to talk to you, too.
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So, what's this mishegas
about you moving out
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00:01:40,997 --> 00:01:44,165
to go live with
the little Polish girl?!
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00:01:44,167 --> 00:01:46,868
How about calling her my wife?
35
00:01:46,870 --> 00:01:49,670
Wives don't take boys
from their mothers.
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They do.
That's why we marry them!
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I just hope I'm not dead
from a broken heart
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before you get back.
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Ma, please. Everyone from NASA
is listening to this phone call.
40
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Good. They should know
what a horrible son you are!
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00:02:06,689 --> 00:02:09,891
Okay, Ma, great talking to you!
Gotta go!
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♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
45
00:02:25,341 --> 00:02:26,908
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
46
00:02:26,910 --> 00:02:29,527
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
47
00:02:29,529 --> 00:02:32,146
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
48
00:02:32,148 --> 00:02:34,832
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
49
00:02:34,834 --> 00:02:36,751
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
50
00:02:36,753 --> 00:02:38,719
♪ Bang! ♪
51
00:02:38,744 --> 00:02:42,744
♪ The Big Bang Theory 6x01 ♪
The Date Night Variable
Original Air Date on September 27, 2012
52
00:02:42,745 --> 00:02:46,745
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
53
00:02:51,741 --> 00:02:54,576
This is so exciting.
54
00:02:54,578 --> 00:02:57,329
Soon, my upper lip will
be the same fake blonde
55
00:02:57,331 --> 00:02:59,414
as my beautiful
best friend.
56
00:03:00,249 --> 00:03:02,634
Hey, this is
my natural hair color.
57
00:03:04,354 --> 00:03:06,972
Now.
58
00:03:06,974 --> 00:03:09,141
So, does Sheldon have
anything special
59
00:03:09,143 --> 00:03:10,926
planned for you
tomorrow night?
60
00:03:10,928 --> 00:03:13,595
Oh, yes. According to the
Relationship Agreement,
61
00:03:13,597 --> 00:03:15,447
on the anniversary
of our first date,
62
00:03:15,449 --> 00:03:18,617
he must take me to a nice
dinner, ask about my day
63
00:03:18,619 --> 00:03:20,569
and engage in casual
physical contact
64
00:03:20,571 --> 00:03:24,039
that a disinterested onlooker
might mistake for intimacy.
65
00:03:24,041 --> 00:03:25,991
That's hot.
66
00:03:27,293 --> 00:03:29,628
You kids better use protection.
67
00:03:29,630 --> 00:03:32,247
How long does
this stay on?
68
00:03:32,249 --> 00:03:33,382
Just a couple of minutes.
69
00:03:33,384 --> 00:03:34,666
You've really never
done this before?
70
00:03:34,668 --> 00:03:37,219
Once in high school,
but I dozed off
71
00:03:37,221 --> 00:03:40,439
and woke up with second-degree
chemical burns on my face.
72
00:03:40,441 --> 00:03:42,257
Oh, my gosh,
that's awful.
73
00:03:42,259 --> 00:03:43,842
The other kids
make fun of you?
74
00:03:43,844 --> 00:03:47,146
No, I had a cover story;
I told everyone it was herpes.
75
00:03:48,565 --> 00:03:50,849
So, how's everything going
with you and Leonard?
76
00:03:50,851 --> 00:03:52,968
I don't know,
it's still kind of weird.
77
00:03:52,970 --> 00:03:55,254
We haven't really recovered
since he proposed to me
78
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in the middle of sex.
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00:03:56,624 --> 00:03:59,241
Oh. Boo-hoo.
80
00:03:59,243 --> 00:04:01,143
If Sheldon proposed
to me during sex,
81
00:04:01,145 --> 00:04:04,913
my ovaries would grab on to him
and never let go.
82
00:04:09,335 --> 00:04:13,839
Leonard, where do you stand
on the anthropic principle?
83
00:04:13,841 --> 00:04:16,542
Interesting question. On the
one hand, I always thought...
84
00:04:16,544 --> 00:04:19,828
You don't even know
what it is, do you?
85
00:04:19,830 --> 00:04:23,048
The anthropic principle states
that if we wish to explain
86
00:04:23,050 --> 00:04:25,551
why our universe exists
the way it does,
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00:04:25,553 --> 00:04:28,503
the answer is that
it must have qualities
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00:04:28,505 --> 00:04:30,889
that allow intelligent
creatures to arise
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00:04:30,891 --> 00:04:33,058
who are capable of
asking the question.
90
00:04:33,060 --> 00:04:36,528
As I am doing
so eloquently right now.
91
00:04:36,530 --> 00:04:39,565
I know what
the anthropic principle is.
92
00:04:39,567 --> 00:04:41,950
Of course.
I just explained it to you.
93
00:04:41,952 --> 00:04:45,520
Now, where do you
stand on it?
94
00:04:45,522 --> 00:04:47,656
Where do you stand on it?
Strongly pro.
95
00:04:47,658 --> 00:04:50,425
Then I believe that God
created the world in six days,
96
00:04:50,427 --> 00:04:53,128
and on the seventh,
he made you to annoy me.
97
00:04:56,916 --> 00:04:58,500
Hey, guys.
Hey.
98
00:04:58,502 --> 00:05:00,419
Yeah, wait, Raj,
where do you stand
99
00:05:00,421 --> 00:05:02,054
on the anthropic
principle?
100
00:05:02,056 --> 00:05:04,206
I'm all for it.
Attaboy!
101
00:05:04,208 --> 00:05:05,540
Well, hang on.
Why do you believe
102
00:05:05,542 --> 00:05:07,259
that he knows
what it is and I don't?
103
00:05:07,261 --> 00:05:09,978
Oh, Leonard.
Let's not take a saw
104
00:05:09,980 --> 00:05:12,547
to the branch
we're sitting on, shall we?
105
00:05:12,549 --> 00:05:14,099
Hey, uh,
if you guys
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00:05:14,101 --> 00:05:17,186
are free tonight, I heard about
a spa where you soak your feet
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00:05:17,188 --> 00:05:18,737
in a pool full of little fish
108
00:05:18,739 --> 00:05:20,772
that eat all the dead skin
right off them.
109
00:05:20,774 --> 00:05:22,557
I don't need
to tell you,
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in Los Angeles, sandal
season is year round.
111
00:05:26,580 --> 00:05:29,031
Actually, I'm hanging
out with Penny.
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00:05:29,033 --> 00:05:32,417
Oh, okay. Sounds like
it's me and you, Sheldon.
113
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How about we sic some guppies
on those puppies?
114
00:05:36,289 --> 00:05:38,840
As I've stated before
on numerous occasions,
115
00:05:38,842 --> 00:05:41,843
the only sea creature I would
even consider being eaten by
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00:05:41,845 --> 00:05:45,047
is the Kraken, because
the last words I would hear are:
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"Release the Kraken."
118
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That never gets old.
119
00:05:49,186 --> 00:05:52,587
"Release the Kraken!"
Oh, chills.
120
00:05:52,589 --> 00:05:55,440
Besides, I'm having
dinner with Amy.
121
00:05:55,442 --> 00:05:58,277
Oh, okay. I'll just go home
and be alone.
122
00:05:58,279 --> 00:05:59,427
W-Which is cool.
123
00:05:59,429 --> 00:06:03,148
I eat alone, I sleep alone,
I cry alone, so...
124
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Cool.
125
00:06:06,819 --> 00:06:10,872
Darn. If you weren't busy,
I'd ask you to join us.
126
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Really? I can
come? Thanks!
127
00:06:13,961 --> 00:06:16,461
Sheldon, are you sure
you want to be bringing Raj
128
00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:18,080
on your date night
with Amy?
129
00:06:18,082 --> 00:06:19,831
Oh, absolutely.
130
00:06:19,833 --> 00:06:24,452
I have a contractual obligation
to provide Amy with conversation
131
00:06:24,454 --> 00:06:26,338
and casual
physical contact,
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00:06:26,340 --> 00:06:28,006
but nowhere is it specified
133
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that I can't outsource that
to an Indian.
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Howie?
135
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Howie?
136
00:06:39,186 --> 00:06:42,271
Hey, there's my beautiful bride!
137
00:06:42,273 --> 00:06:43,572
Can you see me?
138
00:06:43,574 --> 00:06:45,907
I can.
How are you?
139
00:06:45,909 --> 00:06:47,075
I'm amazing.
140
00:06:47,077 --> 00:06:49,528
I mean, this is
even better than I dreamed.
141
00:06:49,530 --> 00:06:54,249
I look out the window, and...
it's all so unbelievable.
142
00:06:54,251 --> 00:06:55,617
Good for you.
143
00:06:55,619 --> 00:07:00,088
I just had a seemingly endless
dinner with your mom.
144
00:07:00,923 --> 00:07:03,258
Oh, yeah? That's nice.
145
00:07:03,260 --> 00:07:05,961
It was. Until I found out
you never told her
146
00:07:05,963 --> 00:07:07,446
we're not gonna live with her.
147
00:07:07,448 --> 00:07:10,882
Let's talk about that
for a minute.
148
00:07:11,768 --> 00:07:15,003
Hey, look, this pen is floating.
149
00:07:15,005 --> 00:07:18,056
How crazy is that?
150
00:07:21,227 --> 00:07:23,695
You said you told her,
but you never did!
151
00:07:23,697 --> 00:07:27,182
Okay, okay, I know
you're upset, but...
152
00:07:27,184 --> 00:07:31,620
let me share something
I've learned since I got here.
153
00:07:31,622 --> 00:07:33,455
You realize
154
00:07:33,457 --> 00:07:35,857
how small your problems are
155
00:07:35,859 --> 00:07:38,710
when you're looking down
on them from space.
156
00:07:39,963 --> 00:07:42,180
Now, come on, that's got
to make you feel better.
157
00:07:42,182 --> 00:07:45,350
How clear is the image
of me on that screen?
158
00:07:45,352 --> 00:07:46,885
Pretty clear.
159
00:07:46,887 --> 00:07:49,688
Do I look like I feel better?
160
00:07:49,690 --> 00:07:54,476
I mean, it's not, like,
HD quality.
161
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Listen, mister, you're
gonna talk to your mother
162
00:07:56,230 --> 00:07:58,463
and you're gonna fix this,
or that thing I said
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I was gonna do to you
the minute you got home,
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00:08:00,868 --> 00:08:03,819
you can do to yourself.
165
00:08:05,888 --> 00:08:08,774
Like he's been
doing since he got here.
166
00:08:13,896 --> 00:08:17,416
Sheldon, this place
is so romantic.
167
00:08:17,418 --> 00:08:19,034
Oh, I'm glad you like it.
168
00:08:19,036 --> 00:08:20,419
Raj picked it out.
169
00:08:20,421 --> 00:08:24,456
Well, when you see him,
tell him I say thank you.
170
00:08:24,458 --> 00:08:26,174
Tell him yourself.
171
00:08:26,176 --> 00:08:28,009
Yoo-hoo!
172
00:08:28,011 --> 00:08:29,678
Over here!
173
00:08:31,431 --> 00:08:34,066
I don't understand.
What's he doing here?
174
00:08:34,068 --> 00:08:35,133
I invited him.
175
00:08:35,135 --> 00:08:37,302
On our date?
176
00:08:37,304 --> 00:08:39,137
Sheldon, that's not okay.
177
00:08:39,139 --> 00:08:40,689
Yes, it is.
178
00:08:40,691 --> 00:08:43,825
There's a loophole
in the Relationship Agreement.
179
00:08:43,827 --> 00:08:45,594
You found a loophole?
180
00:08:47,780 --> 00:08:50,682
Sorry I started without you.
I'm a little nervous.
181
00:08:50,684 --> 00:08:53,452
It's been a long time
since I've been on a date.
182
00:08:53,454 --> 00:08:57,906
I can't believe I bleached
my mustache for this.
183
00:08:57,908 --> 00:08:59,157
You should go
to my girl.
184
00:08:59,159 --> 00:09:01,293
She'll knock out
those sideburns for free.
185
00:09:11,375 --> 00:09:13,441
You know, Amy,
I don't even think
186
00:09:13,443 --> 00:09:15,710
you and I have had
a real conversation.
187
00:09:15,712 --> 00:09:18,830
Let's use tonight to get to know
each other a little better.
188
00:09:18,832 --> 00:09:20,532
You start.
189
00:09:23,402 --> 00:09:25,320
Go home.
190
00:09:25,322 --> 00:09:27,505
I don't understand.
191
00:09:27,507 --> 00:09:30,375
Sheldon, how could you do this?
It's our second anniversary.
192
00:09:30,377 --> 00:09:32,110
It's your anniversary?!
193
00:09:32,112 --> 00:09:35,113
Oh, my God, I had no idea.
194
00:09:35,115 --> 00:09:37,632
Amy, please,
let me make this right.
195
00:09:37,634 --> 00:09:38,783
Thank you.
196
00:09:38,785 --> 00:09:40,118
My pleasure.
Waiter?
197
00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:42,721
A bottle of champagne
and three glasses.
198
00:09:43,589 --> 00:09:44,789
Oh, boy,
199
00:09:44,791 --> 00:09:47,258
isn't this romantic?
200
00:09:47,260 --> 00:09:49,461
Oh, I hope that's
a rhetorical question,
201
00:09:49,463 --> 00:09:51,629
because I have no clue.
202
00:09:53,649 --> 00:09:55,934
This is great.
What's the occasion?
203
00:09:55,936 --> 00:09:57,769
No occasion. You know,
things have been
204
00:09:57,771 --> 00:10:00,605
a little weird between us,
so I wanted to throw together
205
00:10:00,607 --> 00:10:01,940
a fun night
just for you.
206
00:10:01,942 --> 00:10:04,192
That is so sweet.
I got all your favorites.
207
00:10:04,194 --> 00:10:05,360
Beer, wings, sliders.
208
00:10:05,362 --> 00:10:06,995
We can watch the
football game.
209
00:10:06,997 --> 00:10:09,197
I even painted my stomach.
210
00:10:10,833 --> 00:10:12,984
"Go sports"?
Well...
211
00:10:12,986 --> 00:10:15,003
in case you were in
the mood for baseball,
212
00:10:15,005 --> 00:10:17,922
I didn't want to
look ridiculous.
213
00:10:17,924 --> 00:10:19,323
This is awesome.
I love it!
214
00:10:19,325 --> 00:10:20,324
Good, I'm glad.
215
00:10:20,326 --> 00:10:21,910
Gosh, I worked
my ass off today.
216
00:10:21,912 --> 00:10:23,344
This is exactly
what I needed.
217
00:10:23,346 --> 00:10:25,096
Great. Just relax and enjoy.
218
00:10:25,098 --> 00:10:26,581
Tonight is all about you.
219
00:10:26,583 --> 00:10:28,216
Ah, thank you!
220
00:10:30,821 --> 00:10:34,606
So, where exactly are we
in this relationship?
221
00:10:35,441 --> 00:10:36,641
Oh, come on!
222
00:10:36,643 --> 00:10:38,810
I just told you
I had a hard day.
223
00:10:38,812 --> 00:10:40,562
You're right, I'm sorry.
Let's watch the game.
224
00:10:40,564 --> 00:10:41,913
Great.
225
00:10:43,250 --> 00:10:46,117
I just know the longer
we wait to talk about it,
226
00:10:46,119 --> 00:10:48,186
the weirder it gets.
227
00:10:48,188 --> 00:10:51,873
Sweetie, can I just be
the girl tonight?
228
00:10:51,875 --> 00:10:53,875
Absolutely.
You're the girl, I'm the guy.
229
00:10:53,877 --> 00:10:55,393
Now, you watch
your football game
230
00:10:55,395 --> 00:10:57,395
while I make you a
little plate here.
231
00:10:57,397 --> 00:10:59,230
Thank you!
232
00:11:01,468 --> 00:11:02,634
Oh, I'll get it.
233
00:11:02,636 --> 00:11:04,886
Go sports!
234
00:11:06,422 --> 00:11:08,840
Hello-lo-lo.
235
00:11:08,842 --> 00:11:09,974
What are you doing here?
236
00:11:09,976 --> 00:11:11,760
I thought you were out
with Sheldon and Amy.
237
00:11:11,762 --> 00:11:12,894
I was, but it's
their anniversary
238
00:11:12,896 --> 00:11:14,779
and I didn't want
to be a third wheel,
239
00:11:14,781 --> 00:11:16,064
so I figured I'd come over here
240
00:11:16,066 --> 00:11:18,382
and hang out with you
and Penny on your date.
241
00:11:18,384 --> 00:11:20,769
Well, it's not really
a great time.
242
00:11:20,771 --> 00:11:22,654
Penny and I have some things
we need to talk about.
243
00:11:22,656 --> 00:11:24,439
No, we don't!
Come on in!
244
00:11:24,441 --> 00:11:26,224
Sweet!
245
00:11:26,226 --> 00:11:30,612
I can't believe
I shaved my stomach for this.
246
00:11:36,051 --> 00:11:38,336
Hey, Froot Loops.
247
00:11:41,423 --> 00:11:43,458
You got a phone call.
248
00:11:43,460 --> 00:11:44,609
Who is it?
249
00:11:44,611 --> 00:11:46,594
A woman who says
she's your mother
250
00:11:46,596 --> 00:11:49,013
but sounds like
your father.
251
00:11:52,685 --> 00:11:54,752
Hey, Ma.
252
00:11:54,754 --> 00:11:56,855
You know, we could
see each other
253
00:11:56,857 --> 00:11:58,773
if you turn on the computer.
254
00:11:58,775 --> 00:12:01,109
I'm not going near
that fakakta thing.
255
00:12:01,111 --> 00:12:04,028
I'll catch a computer virus!
256
00:12:04,864 --> 00:12:08,116
You can't catch
a computer virus.
257
00:12:08,118 --> 00:12:12,954
Oh, so now you're an astronaut
and a doctor?
258
00:12:12,956 --> 00:12:16,241
What do you want, Ma?
259
00:12:16,243 --> 00:12:20,044
Your wife says you have
something important to tell me.
260
00:12:20,830 --> 00:12:23,882
Okay, here it is.
261
00:12:23,884 --> 00:12:28,336
Bernadette and I are starting
a life together and...
262
00:12:28,338 --> 00:12:31,289
Oh, God!
You are gonna leave me!
263
00:12:31,291 --> 00:12:32,456
Ma...
264
00:12:32,458 --> 00:12:33,791
It's okay.
265
00:12:33,793 --> 00:12:36,261
Your father left me,
you left me--
266
00:12:36,263 --> 00:12:39,814
I guess I'm just the kind
of person people like to leave.
267
00:12:41,433 --> 00:12:44,235
It's not... definite.
268
00:12:44,237 --> 00:12:46,404
I'll talk to Bernadette.
269
00:12:46,406 --> 00:12:47,572
Don't bother.
270
00:12:47,574 --> 00:12:49,858
I'll just go sit in a hole
in the ground
271
00:12:49,860 --> 00:12:52,643
so I'm no trouble when I die.
272
00:12:53,529 --> 00:12:55,246
Stop it, Ma.
273
00:12:55,248 --> 00:12:58,983
I'm sure I can get
Bernie to come around.
274
00:12:58,985 --> 00:13:00,652
I knew it!
275
00:13:00,654 --> 00:13:02,287
I knew she was behind this!
276
00:13:02,289 --> 00:13:04,923
You listen to me,
if you want to be a man,
277
00:13:04,925 --> 00:13:08,710
you can't let a woman
tell you what to do!
278
00:13:08,712 --> 00:13:09,878
Okay,
279
00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:11,763
okay.
280
00:13:11,765 --> 00:13:15,166
I can't believe these people
won the Cold War.
281
00:13:17,169 --> 00:13:20,471
Now, can we please
change the subject?
282
00:13:20,473 --> 00:13:21,606
Fine.
283
00:13:21,608 --> 00:13:23,741
Explain why
you've been gone so long
284
00:13:23,743 --> 00:13:25,810
and I haven't gotten
a single letter.
285
00:13:25,812 --> 00:13:29,280
Not even a lousy postcard!
286
00:13:33,186 --> 00:13:37,021
You know, I'm growing to like
American football.
287
00:13:37,023 --> 00:13:39,057
Yeah, it's fun, isn't it?
Well...
288
00:13:39,059 --> 00:13:41,910
it's not the balls-to-the-wall
action of badminton or cricket,
289
00:13:41,912 --> 00:13:44,028
but hey...
290
00:13:44,030 --> 00:13:46,264
what is?
291
00:13:47,399 --> 00:13:48,866
All right, who's ready
for another beer?
292
00:13:48,868 --> 00:13:50,435
I'm good.
No, thank you.
293
00:13:50,437 --> 00:13:51,970
Girls.
294
00:13:52,805 --> 00:13:55,573
I am having
the nicest time.
295
00:13:55,575 --> 00:13:57,709
You guys are like
family to me.
296
00:13:57,711 --> 00:13:58,910
You know that, right?
297
00:13:58,912 --> 00:14:00,895
That's great.
Get out.
298
00:14:00,897 --> 00:14:02,430
What? Why?
299
00:14:02,432 --> 00:14:04,682
Penny and I have some issues
we need to talk about.
300
00:14:04,684 --> 00:14:05,650
Oh...
301
00:14:05,652 --> 00:14:07,902
pish on your issues!
302
00:14:08,771 --> 00:14:10,838
You guys are fine.
303
00:14:10,840 --> 00:14:12,890
Yes, you hit some bumps
along the way.
304
00:14:12,892 --> 00:14:14,158
I mean, Penny,
305
00:14:14,160 --> 00:14:17,095
you've always known how this man
has felt about you,
306
00:14:17,097 --> 00:14:19,614
but you made him
grovel for affection.
307
00:14:19,616 --> 00:14:20,748
Okay, hold on...
308
00:14:20,750 --> 00:14:21,950
Now, don't blame yourself.
309
00:14:21,952 --> 00:14:24,252
He was a groveler from way back.
310
00:14:25,671 --> 00:14:29,641
But the point is,
the two of you got past it.
311
00:14:29,643 --> 00:14:31,442
And, Leonard,
you go and propose
312
00:14:31,444 --> 00:14:33,628
to this poor girl
in the middle of sex?
313
00:14:33,630 --> 00:14:36,464
That was some weak tea, dude.
314
00:14:37,299 --> 00:14:39,183
Some people might
say it was romantic.
315
00:14:39,185 --> 00:14:40,918
Yeah, no.
316
00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:45,256
But yet, here you two are,
still together.
317
00:14:45,258 --> 00:14:48,426
And that's even after you and I
had our crazy naked night.
318
00:14:48,428 --> 00:14:49,677
Okay...
That's enough.
319
00:14:49,679 --> 00:14:51,212
I'm just saying
320
00:14:51,214 --> 00:14:52,930
that after everything
you've been through,
321
00:14:52,932 --> 00:14:55,066
you get to look
into each other's eyes
322
00:14:55,068 --> 00:14:57,735
and say "I love you."
323
00:14:57,737 --> 00:14:59,754
And that's beautiful.
324
00:15:02,574 --> 00:15:05,793
Actually, to this day,
she's never really said it.
325
00:15:06,729 --> 00:15:09,263
Oh, Penny!
That's ridiculous!
326
00:15:10,299 --> 00:15:11,265
You know you love him!
327
00:15:11,267 --> 00:15:12,800
You look him in the eyes
and you say it.
328
00:15:12,802 --> 00:15:13,801
Raj...
Oh, come on,
329
00:15:13,803 --> 00:15:15,887
you know you want to say it.
Say it.
330
00:15:16,555 --> 00:15:18,823
Say you love him.
331
00:15:20,676 --> 00:15:23,127
Say it!
332
00:15:26,815 --> 00:15:29,367
I really thought
she would say it.
333
00:15:36,492 --> 00:15:41,295
Have I ever told you you're
like a sexy praying mantis?
334
00:15:42,147 --> 00:15:45,416
Every time you drink alcohol.
335
00:15:45,418 --> 00:15:48,486
You know what's wonderful
about the praying mantis?
336
00:15:49,288 --> 00:15:52,173
They devour their mate.
337
00:15:52,175 --> 00:15:53,975
Your point being?
338
00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:03,568
Dessert is served.
339
00:16:04,403 --> 00:16:07,105
I just had cobbler.
340
00:16:07,973 --> 00:16:09,607
You know what?
341
00:16:09,609 --> 00:16:11,392
I'm done with this.
342
00:16:12,945 --> 00:16:14,345
W-Where are
you going?
343
00:16:14,347 --> 00:16:15,947
I'm leaving.
344
00:16:15,949 --> 00:16:17,532
You can't leave.
345
00:16:17,534 --> 00:16:18,966
I need you.
346
00:16:20,819 --> 00:16:23,004
You do?
347
00:16:23,006 --> 00:16:24,722
Yes.
348
00:16:24,724 --> 00:16:26,958
You're my ride.
349
00:16:28,327 --> 00:16:31,662
Sheldon, you either say
something meaningful
350
00:16:31,664 --> 00:16:35,183
and from the heart,
or you and I are done.
351
00:16:36,802 --> 00:16:38,252
All right.
352
00:16:39,371 --> 00:16:42,223
Please.
353
00:16:45,094 --> 00:16:47,678
Amy...
354
00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:50,181
when I look in your eyes
355
00:16:50,183 --> 00:16:52,383
and you're looking
back in mine,
356
00:16:52,385 --> 00:16:56,270
everything feels
not quite normal,
357
00:16:56,272 --> 00:16:58,806
because I feel
358
00:16:58,808 --> 00:17:02,660
stronger and weaker
at the same time.
359
00:17:02,662 --> 00:17:08,566
I feel excited and,
at the same time, terrified.
360
00:17:08,568 --> 00:17:10,901
The truth is,
361
00:17:10,903 --> 00:17:13,838
I don't know
what I feel, except...
362
00:17:13,840 --> 00:17:18,009
I know what kind of man
I want to be.
363
00:17:19,511 --> 00:17:21,345
Sheldon...
364
00:17:21,347 --> 00:17:23,181
that was beautiful.
365
00:17:23,183 --> 00:17:24,348
I should hope so.
366
00:17:24,350 --> 00:17:26,734
That's from the first
Spider-Man movie.
367
00:17:31,473 --> 00:17:34,325
I'll take it.
368
00:17:35,144 --> 00:17:36,561
Good.
369
00:17:36,563 --> 00:17:38,946
Now, I assume
we're splitting the check?
370
00:17:43,285 --> 00:17:44,435
Hey, Stuart.
371
00:17:44,437 --> 00:17:47,572
Oh, hey. I was actually
just about to close up.
372
00:17:47,574 --> 00:17:48,906
Oh, I'm sorry. I'll leave.
373
00:17:48,908 --> 00:17:50,491
No, no. It's
okay. Hang out.
374
00:17:50,493 --> 00:17:51,576
You sure?
375
00:17:51,578 --> 00:17:54,045
Yeah, you're
my first customer today.
376
00:17:54,047 --> 00:17:56,197
All right. Great.
377
00:17:56,199 --> 00:17:57,615
I'm, uh, having a nightcap.
378
00:17:57,617 --> 00:17:59,116
You want to join me?
379
00:17:59,118 --> 00:18:00,284
What are you drinking?
380
00:18:00,286 --> 00:18:03,287
Coffee liqueur
in a Chewbacca mug.
381
00:18:03,289 --> 00:18:06,140
I call it a sad-tini.
382
00:18:06,142 --> 00:18:08,726
Perfect for the night
I'm having. Thank you.
383
00:18:08,728 --> 00:18:11,979
Hmm. Nice not
to drink alone.
384
00:18:11,981 --> 00:18:13,631
Amen to that.
385
00:18:13,633 --> 00:18:15,316
Sometimes I pour
386
00:18:15,318 --> 00:18:18,152
a little chardonnay
into my dog's water bowl.
387
00:18:18,154 --> 00:18:20,321
You're kidding.
388
00:18:20,323 --> 00:18:23,407
She's kind of a mean drunk,
but what are you gonna do?
389
00:18:23,409 --> 00:18:24,692
Cheers.
390
00:18:24,694 --> 00:18:26,143
Cheers.
391
00:18:26,145 --> 00:18:27,912
A little music?
Sure.
392
00:18:31,584 --> 00:18:34,168
Mmm. Bossa nova.
393
00:18:34,170 --> 00:18:37,755
You listen to that with
your hips as well as your ears.
394
00:18:37,757 --> 00:18:39,156
Mmm.
395
00:18:40,542 --> 00:18:42,677
Oh.
396
00:18:42,679 --> 00:18:44,762
Something about...
397
00:18:44,764 --> 00:18:47,181
Latin music just
makes me feel like
398
00:18:47,183 --> 00:18:50,268
I'm on a white sand beach
in Rio.
399
00:18:51,803 --> 00:18:53,137
Yeah.
400
00:18:53,139 --> 00:18:57,225
The sun, the waves,
the beautiful bodies,
401
00:18:57,227 --> 00:19:00,861
tanned and glistening
with sweat.
402
00:19:15,994 --> 00:19:17,695
I should go.
Yeah.
403
00:19:18,530 --> 00:19:20,831
Uh, thank you
for the drink.
404
00:19:20,833 --> 00:19:23,334
No problem.
405
00:19:24,220 --> 00:19:26,170
Hey, Stuart.
Yeah?
406
00:19:26,172 --> 00:19:29,390
Do you want to...
hang out tomorrow night,
407
00:19:29,392 --> 00:19:32,059
maybe grab a bite to eat
or catch a late movie?
408
00:19:32,061 --> 00:19:35,879
Yeah, I-I'd like to,
but I'm a little tight on funds.
409
00:19:35,881 --> 00:19:37,398
No problem. My treat.
410
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:38,983
I'll swing by after work.
411
00:19:38,985 --> 00:19:40,268
Okay.
412
00:19:40,270 --> 00:19:41,902
Okay.
413
00:19:45,724 --> 00:19:48,609
I could do worse.
414
00:19:57,304 --> 00:19:58,840
Aw, that's such
good news, Howie.
415
00:19:58,841 --> 00:20:00,240
Thank you for telling her.
416
00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:03,360
Hey, I'm a grown man;
I'm gonna live with my wife.
417
00:20:03,362 --> 00:20:07,781
My mother's just gonna have
to learn to make do on her own.
418
00:20:07,783 --> 00:20:09,566
Was she upset?
419
00:20:09,568 --> 00:20:12,936
Who can tell?
She yells everything.
420
00:20:14,489 --> 00:20:16,740
She might have been upset.
421
00:20:16,742 --> 00:20:19,376
She might have been hungry.
422
00:20:19,378 --> 00:20:21,829
Thanks for fixing it.
423
00:20:21,831 --> 00:20:23,330
I love you.
424
00:20:23,332 --> 00:20:24,581
I love you, too.
425
00:20:24,583 --> 00:20:26,583
Sweet dreams.
I'll talk to you tomorrow?
426
00:20:26,585 --> 00:20:29,453
Good night, Rocket Man.
427
00:20:29,455 --> 00:20:32,122
To infinity and beyond, baby.
428
00:20:34,692 --> 00:20:36,126
Loops.
429
00:20:36,128 --> 00:20:38,629
You realize you just
lied your ass off
430
00:20:38,631 --> 00:20:40,731
to your wife
and your mother.
431
00:20:40,733 --> 00:20:42,099
I know.
432
00:20:42,101 --> 00:20:44,218
What are you gonna do
when you get back to Earth?
433
00:20:44,220 --> 00:20:45,569
Oh, I'm never going back.
434
00:20:45,571 --> 00:20:49,571
== sync, corrected by elderman ==