1
00:00:02,858 --> 00:00:04,313
Burbank Airport, please.
2
00:00:04,314 --> 00:00:05,730
Vegas, here we come!
3
00:00:05,732 --> 00:00:06,731
No husbands,
4
00:00:06,733 --> 00:00:08,617
no boyfriends, no rules.
5
00:00:08,619 --> 00:00:10,018
No rules?
6
00:00:10,020 --> 00:00:12,153
We're not gonna get drunk
and have a six-way
7
00:00:12,155 --> 00:00:14,406
with the Blue Man Group, are we?
8
00:00:14,408 --> 00:00:16,107
No.
9
00:00:16,109 --> 00:00:17,525
So there are some rules.
10
00:00:17,527 --> 00:00:18,610
Fine.
11
00:00:18,612 --> 00:00:21,913
No husbands, no boyfriends,
some rules.
12
00:00:21,915 --> 00:00:22,697
Thank you.
13
00:00:22,699 --> 00:00:25,700
Vegas!
14
00:00:25,702 --> 00:00:28,787
The ladies are away,
the boys will play.
15
00:00:28,789 --> 00:00:30,071
Anything can happen.
16
00:00:30,073 --> 00:00:31,740
It's gonna get crazy.
17
00:00:31,742 --> 00:00:33,441
Dungeons & Dragons!
18
00:00:35,094 --> 00:00:36,344
I got a brand-new bikini,
19
00:00:36,346 --> 00:00:40,081
so drinks at the pool
are on these.
20
00:00:40,083 --> 00:00:43,435
I got a sexy new tube top
that says "Come hither"
21
00:00:43,437 --> 00:00:47,255
and a can of pepper spray
that says "Close enough, Jack."
22
00:00:47,257 --> 00:00:49,941
I got some old underwear
I'm gonna throw on stage
23
00:00:49,943 --> 00:00:52,394
at the Garth Brooks concert.
24
00:00:52,396 --> 00:00:54,696
I'm sorry, why old?
25
00:00:54,698 --> 00:00:56,764
'Cause last time I saw him,
I threw new ones
26
00:00:56,766 --> 00:00:58,116
and it got me nothing.
27
00:00:59,485 --> 00:01:01,620
I've got a brand-new
seven piece set
28
00:01:01,622 --> 00:01:03,238
of polyhedral dice.
29
00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:06,074
Hello, new dice smell.
30
00:01:07,276 --> 00:01:08,609
I've got my helm
of lordly might,
31
00:01:08,611 --> 00:01:10,962
my boots of speed,
and if things get too exciting,
32
00:01:10,964 --> 00:01:13,614
my inhaler of asthma.
33
00:01:13,616 --> 00:01:16,635
I got my new bloodthirsty
savage warrior
34
00:01:16,637 --> 00:01:19,454
who will lay waste to all
who stand before him.
35
00:01:19,456 --> 00:01:21,172
And I had a sensible salad
for lunch,
36
00:01:21,174 --> 00:01:23,291
so I can eat
all the pizza I want.
37
00:01:23,293 --> 00:01:25,060
Come on, are we
gonna sit around
38
00:01:25,062 --> 00:01:26,794
chatting like a bunch
of teenage girls,
39
00:01:26,796 --> 00:01:29,481
or are we gonna play D & D
like a bunch of teenage boys
40
00:01:29,483 --> 00:01:32,133
who are never gonna have sex
with those teenage girls?!
41
00:01:33,802 --> 00:01:36,154
Vegas! Vegas! Vegas!
42
00:01:36,156 --> 00:01:38,023
The Dungeon
of Mofooskay-Heeko!
43
00:01:38,025 --> 00:01:39,307
The Dungeon of
Mofooskay-Heeko!
44
00:01:39,309 --> 00:01:41,743
The Dungeon
of Mofooskay-Heeko!
45
00:01:45,031 --> 00:01:48,667
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
46
00:01:48,669 --> 00:01:52,003
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
47
00:01:52,005 --> 00:01:53,672
♪ The Earth began to cool
48
00:01:53,674 --> 00:01:56,224
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
49
00:01:56,226 --> 00:01:58,860
♪ We built the Wall
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
50
00:01:58,862 --> 00:02:01,563
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
51
00:02:01,565 --> 00:02:03,465
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
52
00:02:03,467 --> 00:02:05,265
♪ Bang! ♪
53
00:02:05,266 --> 00:02:09,266
♪ The Big Bang Theory 6x23 ♪
The Love Spell Potential
Original Air Date on May 9, 2013
54
00:02:09,267 --> 00:02:14,267
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
55
00:02:14,270 --> 00:02:16,455
I'm actually glad
Lucy had to work tonight.
56
00:02:16,457 --> 00:02:19,091
Saved me the awkward
conversation about how I was
57
00:02:19,093 --> 00:02:21,877
gonna be hanging with my bros.
58
00:02:21,879 --> 00:02:24,513
Isn't every conversation
you two have awkward?
59
00:02:24,515 --> 00:02:25,931
Eh?
60
00:02:25,933 --> 00:02:27,215
Painfully so.
61
00:02:27,217 --> 00:02:29,684
We have this rule on the phone
that if no one talks
62
00:02:29,686 --> 00:02:32,220
for three minutes,
you can just hang up.
63
00:02:33,756 --> 00:02:35,974
So into her.
64
00:02:35,976 --> 00:02:38,143
Ready whenever
you guys are.
65
00:02:38,145 --> 00:02:40,095
Yeah, yeah, we'll
be right there.
66
00:02:40,097 --> 00:02:41,329
Yeah, Leonard...
Yeah?
67
00:02:41,331 --> 00:02:42,647
I'm not sure how I feel
68
00:02:42,649 --> 00:02:45,901
about Howard being
dungeon master instead of you.
69
00:02:45,903 --> 00:02:46,935
Oh, that's nice.
70
00:02:46,937 --> 00:02:49,121
But relax,
sometimes change is good.
71
00:02:49,123 --> 00:02:51,323
Uh, you were worried
about Zachary Quinto
72
00:02:51,325 --> 00:02:53,742
being the new Spock,
but you wound up liking him.
73
00:02:53,744 --> 00:02:54,776
Oh, please.
74
00:02:54,778 --> 00:02:56,411
Every time the topic
of change comes up,
75
00:02:56,413 --> 00:02:58,163
you throw Zachary
Quinto in my face.
76
00:02:59,132 --> 00:03:00,949
I'm upset the mailman
has a new haircut:
77
00:03:00,951 --> 00:03:02,334
Zachary Quinto.
78
00:03:02,336 --> 00:03:04,252
I'm upset that daylight
saving time started:
79
00:03:04,254 --> 00:03:05,670
Zachary Quinto.
80
00:03:05,672 --> 00:03:07,956
I'm upset daylight saving time
ended: Zachary Quinto.
81
00:03:07,958 --> 00:03:09,141
I'm saying this
82
00:03:09,143 --> 00:03:10,926
for the last time:
Zachary Quinto was
83
00:03:10,928 --> 00:03:12,811
a weird, wonderful,
unrepeatable event.
84
00:03:12,813 --> 00:03:14,763
So stop using
him against me.
85
00:03:15,598 --> 00:03:17,849
Okay, here we go.
86
00:03:17,851 --> 00:03:20,018
You find yourselves in
87
00:03:20,020 --> 00:03:22,521
an overgrown old forest.
88
00:03:22,523 --> 00:03:25,857
Before you is a giant oak tree
89
00:03:25,859 --> 00:03:30,028
with a face on it that looks
a lot like Nicolas Cage.
90
00:03:30,030 --> 00:03:32,581
He says,
91
00:03:32,583 --> 00:03:35,750
"Travel with caution.
92
00:03:37,003 --> 00:03:40,755
"These woods are home
to the bones
93
00:03:40,757 --> 00:03:42,657
"of many a fallen...
94
00:03:42,659 --> 00:03:44,876
hero!"
95
00:03:47,597 --> 00:03:51,516
See, Howard's just as good
a dungeon master as I am.
96
00:03:51,518 --> 00:03:52,767
As good?
97
00:03:52,769 --> 00:03:55,387
You just got pantsed
in the schoolyard, four-eyes.
98
00:03:55,389 --> 00:03:57,439
Hey, come on, guys, focus.
99
00:03:57,441 --> 00:03:59,374
Um, uh...
100
00:03:59,376 --> 00:04:02,144
Oh, mighty Nicolas Cage tree,
101
00:04:02,146 --> 00:04:03,528
we thank you
for your warning,
102
00:04:03,530 --> 00:04:05,480
but we are brave warriors,
103
00:04:05,482 --> 00:04:08,817
and nothing short of death
will keep us from our goal.
104
00:04:12,705 --> 00:04:14,406
Oh, Lucy's free after all.
105
00:04:14,408 --> 00:04:16,158
See ya.
106
00:04:17,026 --> 00:04:18,660
Hey, hey, hey,
you can't leave.
107
00:04:18,662 --> 00:04:19,845
We just started.
108
00:04:19,847 --> 00:04:21,379
You're right,
I should finish the game.
109
00:04:21,381 --> 00:04:24,466
I take my plus-one long sword,
stab myself in the face with it.
110
00:04:24,468 --> 00:04:26,501
I'm dead, I've got
a date with a girl.
111
00:04:26,503 --> 00:04:28,136
Bye.
112
00:04:29,889 --> 00:04:30,922
We'll be fine, watch.
113
00:04:30,924 --> 00:04:33,758
Suddenly, a spectral shape
114
00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:37,512
rises from Koothrappali's
bloody corpse, and says,
115
00:04:37,514 --> 00:04:39,064
"Don't worry, buddies,
116
00:04:39,066 --> 00:04:41,066
"Ghost Raj will help
117
00:04:41,068 --> 00:04:42,934
guide you through the forest."
118
00:04:42,936 --> 00:04:45,386
"Well, I'm just
119
00:04:45,388 --> 00:04:47,822
"a tree, but if I were you,
I'd listen to your
120
00:04:47,824 --> 00:04:49,691
ghost friend!"
121
00:04:53,079 --> 00:04:56,031
Go on, give him
your lunch money.
122
00:05:00,169 --> 00:05:03,121
I'm very happy you were able
to hang out tonight.
123
00:05:03,123 --> 00:05:04,372
Me, too.
124
00:05:04,374 --> 00:05:06,458
Not that it's up to you
to make me happy.
125
00:05:06,460 --> 00:05:08,009
Uh, well, unless
you find neediness sexy.
126
00:05:08,011 --> 00:05:09,711
In which case,
you're about to have dinner
127
00:05:09,713 --> 00:05:12,097
with the hottest man
on the planet.
128
00:05:13,799 --> 00:05:15,467
Can I tell you something?
129
00:05:15,469 --> 00:05:17,219
I was so nervous
about seeing you,
130
00:05:17,221 --> 00:05:19,638
before I left my apartment,
I put roll-on antiperspirant
131
00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:21,890
all over my body.
132
00:05:21,892 --> 00:05:23,424
Really?
Yeah.
133
00:05:23,426 --> 00:05:25,610
If sweat starts squirting
out the top of my head,
134
00:05:25,612 --> 00:05:27,646
you'll know why.
135
00:05:27,648 --> 00:05:29,531
I, uh, I'm sorry
to put you through that.
136
00:05:29,533 --> 00:05:31,449
Oh, it's okay.
137
00:05:31,451 --> 00:05:32,600
I've been trying
to force myself
138
00:05:32,602 --> 00:05:34,286
to do things that
make me scared.
139
00:05:34,288 --> 00:05:36,538
What else have you been
thinking about doing?
140
00:05:36,540 --> 00:05:38,073
Well, let's see.
141
00:05:38,075 --> 00:05:40,575
I'd love to be able to tell
the lady who cuts my hair
142
00:05:40,577 --> 00:05:42,460
that I don't like bangs.
143
00:05:42,462 --> 00:05:44,913
I like your bangs.
144
00:05:44,915 --> 00:05:46,715
Oh, thanks, I
like 'em, too.
145
00:05:55,641 --> 00:05:56,841
What else?
146
00:05:56,843 --> 00:05:58,176
Mm...
147
00:05:58,178 --> 00:06:00,061
it's kind of a tie
between sending food back
148
00:06:00,063 --> 00:06:01,980
in a restaurant and
saying no to those kids
149
00:06:01,982 --> 00:06:03,464
who sell magazines
door-to-door.
150
00:06:03,466 --> 00:06:04,683
Mm, yeah.
151
00:06:04,685 --> 00:06:06,601
Those are both toughies.
I know.
152
00:06:06,603 --> 00:06:08,937
I have a two-year
subscription to Guns & Ammo.
153
00:06:12,008 --> 00:06:14,642
I push my shoulder
against the secret door
154
00:06:14,644 --> 00:06:16,194
to see if it gives way.
155
00:06:16,196 --> 00:06:17,312
Uh...
156
00:06:17,314 --> 00:06:18,446
it does.
157
00:06:21,251 --> 00:06:23,918
He does sound
effects, too!
158
00:06:25,037 --> 00:06:27,372
Hey, I always did sound effects.
159
00:06:27,374 --> 00:06:30,675
A-A swarm of bloodthirsty bats
fly through the dungeon.
160
00:06:34,096 --> 00:06:36,765
Uh, uh, they attack
a nearby unicorn.
161
00:06:42,855 --> 00:06:45,707
Okay, well, I have a sound
effect for those sound effects.
162
00:06:48,811 --> 00:06:50,979
Guess who!
163
00:06:50,981 --> 00:06:52,280
What are you doing back?
164
00:06:52,282 --> 00:06:55,516
That's an excellent
question. Amy?
165
00:06:55,518 --> 00:06:57,986
Uh, well...
166
00:06:57,988 --> 00:06:59,788
when we were going
through security,
167
00:06:59,790 --> 00:07:02,207
I got pulled
out of line for a pat-down.
168
00:07:02,209 --> 00:07:03,425
The, uh,
169
00:07:03,427 --> 00:07:05,794
TSA agent got
a little handsy...
170
00:07:06,612 --> 00:07:08,129
I may have broken
171
00:07:08,131 --> 00:07:09,864
her nose with my elbow.
172
00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:13,051
Long story short,
she's on the No Fly List
173
00:07:13,053 --> 00:07:16,054
and we might have been
followed here by a drone.
174
00:07:16,056 --> 00:07:17,889
I'm sorry.
175
00:07:17,891 --> 00:07:19,841
I feel like such an idiot.
176
00:07:19,843 --> 00:07:20,875
Oh, it's not so bad.
177
00:07:20,877 --> 00:07:22,310
You lost money, you're
filled with shame
178
00:07:22,312 --> 00:07:23,845
and you got groped
by a stranger.
179
00:07:23,847 --> 00:07:26,314
I mean, that's Vegas,
you nailed it.
180
00:07:26,316 --> 00:07:28,566
You guys enjoy your evening.
181
00:07:28,568 --> 00:07:30,902
I'm gonna go before I ruin
anybody else's weekend.
182
00:07:30,904 --> 00:07:33,388
That's my girl.
183
00:07:33,390 --> 00:07:35,273
No, no.
184
00:07:35,275 --> 00:07:37,275
Amy, wait. Uh, uh,
I know it's not
185
00:07:37,277 --> 00:07:38,443
the night you had in mind,
186
00:07:38,445 --> 00:07:40,195
but why don't you guys stay
and play with us?
187
00:07:40,197 --> 00:07:41,162
It'll be fun.
188
00:07:41,164 --> 00:07:42,364
It would-- fun?
189
00:07:42,366 --> 00:07:43,615
Yeah, okay,
three weeks ago,
190
00:07:43,617 --> 00:07:44,783
you bought crunchy
peanut butter,
191
00:07:44,785 --> 00:07:47,035
but now you want the
girls to play D & D--
192
00:07:47,037 --> 00:07:48,970
do you have a
drug problem?
193
00:07:48,972 --> 00:07:50,588
What's the big deal?
194
00:07:50,590 --> 00:07:53,174
Raj bailed, so we could
use some extra players.
195
00:07:53,176 --> 00:07:54,909
Well, I've just never
played Dungeons & Dragons
196
00:07:54,911 --> 00:07:56,911
with girls before.
197
00:07:56,913 --> 00:07:57,879
Oh, don't worry, sweetie.
198
00:07:57,881 --> 00:08:00,031
No one has.
199
00:08:01,784 --> 00:08:03,885
So, what do you say?
200
00:08:05,554 --> 00:08:07,889
I'll leave it up to
the dungeon master.
201
00:08:09,109 --> 00:08:12,277
Yeah, a... satanic fungus
202
00:08:12,279 --> 00:08:15,280
that looks suspiciously
like Al Pacino
203
00:08:15,282 --> 00:08:18,867
rises from the forest floor
and says,
204
00:08:18,869 --> 00:08:21,236
"You're playing D & D.
205
00:08:21,238 --> 00:08:23,321
"You're playing
D & D.
206
00:08:23,323 --> 00:08:26,241
"This whole apartment...
207
00:08:27,426 --> 00:08:30,128
...is playing D & D."
208
00:08:41,090 --> 00:08:42,957
Okay, who wants a drink?
209
00:08:42,959 --> 00:08:46,260
Yeah, we-- now, Penny,
we don't consume alcohol
210
00:08:46,262 --> 00:08:47,795
during Dungeons & Dragons.
211
00:08:47,797 --> 00:08:50,547
It impairs our judgment.
212
00:08:50,549 --> 00:08:52,433
Oh, this isn't alcohol.
213
00:08:52,435 --> 00:08:55,519
It's a magic potion
that makes me like you.
214
00:08:58,473 --> 00:09:01,358
Double potion, please.
215
00:09:01,360 --> 00:09:02,443
Okay, here we go.
216
00:09:02,445 --> 00:09:03,944
You find yourselves
217
00:09:03,946 --> 00:09:08,115
face-to-face
with two hulking ogres.
218
00:09:08,117 --> 00:09:10,150
"What are you doing
219
00:09:10,152 --> 00:09:11,902
"in our dungeon?
220
00:09:13,855 --> 00:09:16,924
You shall die!"
221
00:09:16,926 --> 00:09:19,126
Okay, literal
goose bumps.
222
00:09:19,128 --> 00:09:21,295
Look.
223
00:09:21,297 --> 00:09:22,746
What do you do?
224
00:09:22,748 --> 00:09:24,197
I draw my broadsword.
225
00:09:24,199 --> 00:09:25,365
I ready my
quarter-staff.
226
00:09:25,367 --> 00:09:28,201
I drink my potion.
227
00:09:29,838 --> 00:09:31,872
- I say we attack the big one.
- You know what?
228
00:09:31,874 --> 00:09:33,090
Give me the dice,
I want to roll.
229
00:09:33,092 --> 00:09:34,141
Well, the dungeon master's
230
00:09:34,143 --> 00:09:35,208
supposed to roll.
231
00:09:35,210 --> 00:09:36,560
Yeah, well I'm supposed
to be in Vegas
232
00:09:36,562 --> 00:09:38,545
throwing up on a shrimp buffet.
Now give it.
233
00:09:40,765 --> 00:09:42,399
All right,
what do I need?
234
00:09:42,401 --> 00:09:44,985
Uh, 15 or higher.
235
00:09:44,987 --> 00:09:46,820
15's the point, the point is 15.
236
00:09:46,822 --> 00:09:50,574
Give the little lady some room,
here it is, coming out.
237
00:09:50,576 --> 00:09:51,558
Sixteen!
238
00:09:51,560 --> 00:09:54,078
Yes!
239
00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:56,730
Oh, please tell me
we're playing for money.
240
00:09:56,732 --> 00:09:58,248
Oh, even better than money.
241
00:09:58,250 --> 00:10:01,001
You gained experience points.
242
00:10:01,003 --> 00:10:03,337
More potion, please.
243
00:10:03,339 --> 00:10:04,755
Yeah.
244
00:10:05,924 --> 00:10:08,125
How are
your crab cakes?
245
00:10:08,127 --> 00:10:09,543
Kind of funky.
246
00:10:09,545 --> 00:10:10,344
That's great.
247
00:10:10,346 --> 00:10:11,545
It is?
248
00:10:11,547 --> 00:10:14,932
Does "funky" mean
something different in India?
249
00:10:14,934 --> 00:10:17,434
No, no. Uh, you've always
wanted to send your food back
250
00:10:17,436 --> 00:10:19,019
in a restaurant;
here's your chance.
251
00:10:19,044 --> 00:10:19,888
Mm.
252
00:10:19,889 --> 00:10:21,438
It's okay. I just won't eat 'em.
253
00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:23,524
Don't be ridiculous. Waiter?
254
00:10:24,359 --> 00:10:26,110
Everything all right?
255
00:10:26,112 --> 00:10:28,696
Uh... yeah.
256
00:10:28,698 --> 00:10:31,098
Everything all right with you?
257
00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:32,449
Yes.
258
00:10:33,267 --> 00:10:34,735
'Kay, thanks, bye.
259
00:10:34,737 --> 00:10:36,904
Hold on.
260
00:10:36,906 --> 00:10:39,039
Isn't there something else
you wanted to tell him?
261
00:10:39,941 --> 00:10:42,292
N-No, it-it's fine. Uh...
262
00:10:42,294 --> 00:10:45,946
He's from a different country;
he doesn't understand our ways.
263
00:10:47,799 --> 00:10:49,950
Don't be silly. Just tell him.
264
00:10:50,785 --> 00:10:52,803
I have to go to the bathroom.
265
00:10:52,805 --> 00:10:53,971
And it's not because
266
00:10:53,973 --> 00:10:55,339
the crab cakes are funky.
267
00:10:57,142 --> 00:10:58,425
So you're okay here?
268
00:10:58,427 --> 00:10:59,626
Uh, yeah, sorry.
269
00:10:59,628 --> 00:11:01,645
She's just a little shy.
270
00:11:01,647 --> 00:11:04,014
The-the first time we met,
she was so nervous,
271
00:11:04,016 --> 00:11:06,984
she climbed out a bathroom
window to get away from me.
272
00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:23,650
Uh-oh.
273
00:11:27,622 --> 00:11:29,623
Hey, Raj.
274
00:11:29,625 --> 00:11:32,492
Funny story.
275
00:11:33,595 --> 00:11:36,847
Come on, mama wants a
pair of dead ogres!
276
00:11:37,682 --> 00:11:39,683
17! The larger ogre is dead!
277
00:11:41,554 --> 00:11:43,103
The-the other ogre says,
278
00:11:43,105 --> 00:11:46,356
"You killed my brother.
279
00:11:46,358 --> 00:11:49,843
Now Ogre Thanksgiving
is ruined."
280
00:11:50,695 --> 00:11:52,646
That is amazing.
281
00:11:52,648 --> 00:11:55,199
He made me care
about the ogre!
282
00:11:56,117 --> 00:11:57,895
All right, Amy,
there's one ogre left.
283
00:11:57,896 --> 00:11:59,479
Take him out!
Okay.
284
00:11:59,481 --> 00:12:01,731
Pretend he's that
TSA agent. Come on.
285
00:12:03,734 --> 00:12:04,634
Nineteen!
286
00:12:06,471 --> 00:12:08,104
Yes!
287
00:12:08,106 --> 00:12:10,490
This is turning out to be
even better than Vegas!
288
00:12:10,492 --> 00:12:13,109
No, it's not!
289
00:12:16,247 --> 00:12:17,364
Lucy?
290
00:12:17,366 --> 00:12:18,748
Oh, hey.
291
00:12:18,750 --> 00:12:20,700
Long time no see.
292
00:12:23,671 --> 00:12:24,821
You don't know me very well,
293
00:12:24,823 --> 00:12:26,756
but each time you crawl out
a bathroom window
294
00:12:26,758 --> 00:12:30,293
to escape my company,
it chips away at my masculinity.
295
00:12:30,295 --> 00:12:32,045
I'm sorry.
296
00:12:32,047 --> 00:12:33,680
Why would you leave like that?
297
00:12:33,682 --> 00:12:35,331
You were pushing me;
I clearly didn't want
298
00:12:35,333 --> 00:12:38,268
to send my food back, and you
tried to make me do it anyway.
299
00:12:38,270 --> 00:12:41,855
Okay, if I upset you, then why
didn't you just say something?
300
00:12:41,857 --> 00:12:44,441
Well, how can I tell you I'm
upset if I can't tell the woman
301
00:12:44,443 --> 00:12:47,277
at Supercuts that my forehead's
my best feature?
302
00:12:48,779 --> 00:12:49,896
It's scary.
303
00:12:49,898 --> 00:12:51,698
Yeah, well, I like you a lot,
304
00:12:51,700 --> 00:12:53,566
and that's scary for me.
305
00:12:53,568 --> 00:12:57,287
Mostly because
you're a proven flight risk.
306
00:12:57,289 --> 00:13:00,490
How could you like me a lot?
307
00:13:00,492 --> 00:13:03,243
Well, uh, for one thing,
308
00:13:03,245 --> 00:13:05,378
you have bigger
emotional problems than I do,
309
00:13:05,380 --> 00:13:08,298
and I find that
very attractive in a woman!
310
00:13:09,634 --> 00:13:13,086
I-I don't know. I just...
311
00:13:13,088 --> 00:13:15,255
I think you're wonderful.
312
00:13:22,013 --> 00:13:24,431
I'm sweating out of my head.
313
00:13:28,352 --> 00:13:33,273
The dragon falls from the sky,
crashing into the volcano!
314
00:13:34,493 --> 00:13:36,026
But wait!
315
00:13:36,028 --> 00:13:37,243
He's not dead.
316
00:13:37,245 --> 00:13:38,695
He crawls out,
317
00:13:38,697 --> 00:13:43,416
spreads his wings
and prepares to attack.
318
00:13:43,418 --> 00:13:44,451
Yeah, uh, wait!
319
00:13:46,203 --> 00:13:48,571
Doesn't he say
something first?
320
00:13:48,573 --> 00:13:52,559
You know, maybe in the voice
of a beloved celebrity?
321
00:13:52,561 --> 00:13:54,377
Fine.
322
00:13:54,379 --> 00:13:58,214
"You'd think, after all these years,
323
00:13:58,216 --> 00:14:03,770
"I'd know not to fly
over volcanoes.
324
00:14:03,772 --> 00:14:06,106
I'm a freaking idiot."
325
00:14:08,309 --> 00:14:10,143
The dragon's
Christopher Walken!
326
00:14:10,145 --> 00:14:12,645
That's perfect.
327
00:14:12,647 --> 00:14:13,947
All right, Amy,
it's your turn.
328
00:14:13,949 --> 00:14:15,031
We need one more hit.
329
00:14:15,033 --> 00:14:17,033
Finish him off!
Here we go.
330
00:14:17,035 --> 00:14:18,585
Fifteen?
331
00:14:18,587 --> 00:14:20,937
It's a hit. The dragon collapses
to the ground!
332
00:14:20,939 --> 00:14:22,655
Wait.
333
00:14:22,657 --> 00:14:23,990
Wait.
334
00:14:23,992 --> 00:14:26,826
And says...
335
00:14:26,828 --> 00:14:29,162
"Mother?
336
00:14:29,164 --> 00:14:31,664
"Is that you?
337
00:14:32,800 --> 00:14:36,386
Your little boy is coming home."
338
00:14:38,172 --> 00:14:41,141
Oh, I don't know about you
guys, but I have been through
339
00:14:41,143 --> 00:14:43,343
the emotional
wringer tonight.
340
00:14:43,345 --> 00:14:45,562
This may be the potion
talking, but you are
341
00:14:45,564 --> 00:14:48,681
one fine-ass dungeon master.
342
00:14:48,683 --> 00:14:50,233
Oh, yeah?
Well, when we get home,
343
00:14:50,235 --> 00:14:52,102
I'm gonna take you
on a whole different adventure.
344
00:14:52,104 --> 00:14:54,154
Another quest
345
00:14:54,156 --> 00:14:56,906
by Wolowitz?
Count me in.
346
00:14:58,542 --> 00:15:01,027
Sheldon, they're talking
about sex.
347
00:15:01,029 --> 00:15:04,147
Oh, then I'm out.
348
00:15:05,282 --> 00:15:06,983
Ooh! I have an idea.
349
00:15:06,985 --> 00:15:08,918
Since it's not happening
anytime soon,
350
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:11,371
why don't your character
and your character
351
00:15:11,373 --> 00:15:13,339
do it in the game?
352
00:15:13,341 --> 00:15:15,341
Ooh!
353
00:15:16,026 --> 00:15:17,460
Come on, back
me up here.
354
00:15:17,462 --> 00:15:18,428
Oh.
355
00:15:18,430 --> 00:15:20,830
Ooh!
Ooh!
356
00:15:21,999 --> 00:15:26,102
Okay, I cast a love spell
on Sheldon and Amy.
357
00:15:26,104 --> 00:15:29,773
Oo... Sorry, I thought
you were gonna do that...
358
00:15:31,776 --> 00:15:33,977
The love spell takes effect.
359
00:15:33,979 --> 00:15:35,395
When Sheldon looks
360
00:15:35,397 --> 00:15:38,848
at Amy, she is the most
beautiful half-orc
361
00:15:38,850 --> 00:15:40,450
he's ever seen,
362
00:15:40,452 --> 00:15:42,318
and he's overcome
363
00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:44,687
with a desire
to rip her armor off
364
00:15:44,689 --> 00:15:48,575
and gaze fondly
at her four hairy breasts.
365
00:15:49,827 --> 00:15:53,797
When Amy sees Sheldon,
he looks...
366
00:15:53,799 --> 00:15:56,866
well, just like Sheldon, 'cause
apparently she's into that.
367
00:15:58,552 --> 00:15:59,886
What do you do?
368
00:16:01,589 --> 00:16:03,223
I don't like this.
369
00:16:11,165 --> 00:16:14,717
You see what happens
when you let girls play D & D?
370
00:16:17,771 --> 00:16:20,106
Amy.
371
00:16:20,108 --> 00:16:21,658
Amy.
372
00:16:22,661 --> 00:16:24,444
Amy.
373
00:16:24,446 --> 00:16:26,663
What?
374
00:16:28,749 --> 00:16:31,234
I've never knocked
on my own door before.
375
00:16:32,620 --> 00:16:34,954
That was a wild ride.
376
00:16:34,956 --> 00:16:38,091
You don't have to come in here
and cheer me up.
377
00:16:38,093 --> 00:16:39,676
Thank you.
378
00:16:39,678 --> 00:16:41,427
Would you go tell
everyone else that?
379
00:16:41,429 --> 00:16:43,613
Because they sure think
otherwise.
380
00:16:44,515 --> 00:16:46,799
I'll tell you what they think.
381
00:16:46,801 --> 00:16:49,853
They think our relationship
is a joke.
382
00:16:50,971 --> 00:16:53,890
Well, I don't think
our relationship is a joke.
383
00:16:53,892 --> 00:16:55,642
I think
384
00:16:55,644 --> 00:16:57,093
"a horse goes into a bar,
385
00:16:57,095 --> 00:16:58,878
bartender says,
'Why the long face?'"
386
00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:00,914
That's a joke.
387
00:17:02,383 --> 00:17:06,186
It's a good one, too,
because a horse has a long face.
388
00:17:07,021 --> 00:17:09,605
Sheldon,
389
00:17:09,607 --> 00:17:12,825
are we ever going to have
an intimate relationship?
390
00:17:12,827 --> 00:17:14,878
Oh, my.
391
00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:16,880
That's an uncomfortable topic.
392
00:17:19,783 --> 00:17:22,518
Amy...
393
00:17:22,520 --> 00:17:24,721
fore I met you,
394
00:17:24,723 --> 00:17:28,942
I never had any interest
in being intimate with anyone.
395
00:17:29,777 --> 00:17:31,377
And now?
396
00:17:32,980 --> 00:17:35,531
And now what?
397
00:17:37,634 --> 00:17:40,353
Do you have any interest now?
398
00:17:42,106 --> 00:17:43,690
I have not ruled it out.
399
00:17:43,692 --> 00:17:45,091
Wow.
400
00:17:45,093 --> 00:17:47,327
Talk dirty to me.
401
00:17:47,329 --> 00:17:50,813
I know it doesn't seem
like it to you, but,
402
00:17:50,815 --> 00:17:53,199
for me, what we have
403
00:17:53,201 --> 00:17:56,419
is extremely intimate.
404
00:17:57,254 --> 00:17:59,989
I guess I know that.
405
00:17:59,991 --> 00:18:02,292
It's just...
406
00:18:02,294 --> 00:18:04,327
part of me wants more.
407
00:18:04,329 --> 00:18:06,346
More?
408
00:18:06,348 --> 00:18:07,931
I mean, look at us.
409
00:18:07,933 --> 00:18:10,717
It's only been three years;
here we are in bed together.
410
00:18:15,522 --> 00:18:17,924
Come on.
411
00:18:17,926 --> 00:18:19,525
Let's go back out there.
412
00:18:19,527 --> 00:18:22,678
Y... Well, no.
Hold on.
413
00:18:22,680 --> 00:18:27,984
My Elven magic-user
and your half-orc warrior
414
00:18:27,986 --> 00:18:31,020
did have a love spell
cast on them.
415
00:18:32,122 --> 00:18:34,123
We wouldn't really
be playing the game right
416
00:18:34,125 --> 00:18:36,359
if we didn't see that through.
417
00:18:37,177 --> 00:18:39,712
Okay.
418
00:18:41,732 --> 00:18:46,586
I believe that, uh,
we just killed a dragon.
419
00:18:48,422 --> 00:18:51,341
While the others
pillage the corpse,
420
00:18:51,343 --> 00:18:55,345
I lead you
to a secluded area
421
00:18:55,347 --> 00:19:00,549
where I attempt
to remove your leather armor.
422
00:19:05,389 --> 00:19:06,322
It comes off.
423
00:19:06,324 --> 00:19:09,275
Oh.
424
00:19:10,194 --> 00:19:11,744
What do you do?
425
00:19:14,398 --> 00:19:16,565
I...
426
00:19:17,751 --> 00:19:20,586
...kiss you... on the lips.
427
00:19:22,289 --> 00:19:26,459
I kiss you back on the...
428
00:19:28,796 --> 00:19:30,263
...lips as well.
429
00:19:31,882 --> 00:19:34,017
Your turn.
430
00:19:35,719 --> 00:19:38,388
I... remove your armor.
431
00:19:40,257 --> 00:19:42,225
What do you do?
432
00:19:42,227 --> 00:19:46,696
I... erotically caress your...
433
00:19:49,366 --> 00:19:50,400
...nose.
434
00:19:50,402 --> 00:19:51,951
Keep rolling.
435
00:20:04,426 --> 00:20:06,627
Hey, you guys have been
in there for a while.
436
00:20:06,629 --> 00:20:08,629
- You doing okay?
- We're fine, thank you.
437
00:20:08,631 --> 00:20:10,648
Okay, we just want to say,
we feel really bad about...
438
00:20:10,650 --> 00:20:13,768
Go away! Sheldon
is nibbling on my...
439
00:20:13,770 --> 00:20:15,636
14! Yes!
440
00:20:15,638 --> 00:20:20,638
== sync, corrected by elderman ==