1
00:00:02,503 --> 00:00:05,937
Hey! Look what I got everybody.
2
00:00:05,972 --> 00:00:09,908
Newspapers? Did you find
a portal back to the 1990s?
3
00:00:11,511 --> 00:00:13,712
No. If he had that,
he'd be trying to prevent NSYNC
4
00:00:13,747 --> 00:00:15,380
from breaking up.
5
00:00:15,415 --> 00:00:17,082
Oh, please.
I'm glad they broke up.
6
00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:19,485
Otherwise, Justin would
never have brought sexy back.
7
00:00:20,987 --> 00:00:23,388
One thing you can't get
on an iPad,
8
00:00:23,423 --> 00:00:25,924
(inhales)
the smell of ink and paper.
9
00:00:25,959 --> 00:00:28,027
One more reason
iPads are better.
10
00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:31,463
They reviewed
my planetarium show.
11
00:00:31,498 --> 00:00:34,133
Yeah. It's on page three
of the Arts and Leisure section.
12
00:00:42,375 --> 00:00:44,910
Oh, look, they still
have Far Side.
13
00:00:44,945 --> 00:00:46,812
Oh, I don't
get that one.
14
00:00:46,847 --> 00:00:49,748
Oh, he's pushing
when he should be pulling.
15
00:00:49,783 --> 00:00:54,086
Hmm. I don't think he belongs
in that gifted school, then.
16
00:00:54,121 --> 00:00:55,921
What are you doing?
Making a boat.
17
00:00:55,956 --> 00:00:57,956
When I was a kid,
my dad showed me how.
18
00:00:57,991 --> 00:01:00,526
Boy, you'll do anything
to avoid reading.
19
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:04,162
Guys, it's under
"Things to do this weekend."
20
00:01:04,197 --> 00:01:05,997
I can't find it.
What does it say?
21
00:01:06,032 --> 00:01:09,201
That it's a thing
to do this weekend.
22
00:01:09,236 --> 00:01:11,970
That's great, Raj.
Congratulations.
23
00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:13,271
You know, while we're bragging,
24
00:01:13,306 --> 00:01:14,873
The Journal
of Prosthetic Medicine
25
00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:17,109
just wrote up the project that
Howard and I are working on.
26
00:01:17,144 --> 00:01:19,277
Well, you didn't
tell me that.
27
00:01:19,312 --> 00:01:21,446
Oh, it just came out.
It's just a little blurb.
28
00:01:21,481 --> 00:01:23,548
Oh, well, good for you.
29
00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:25,784
You know, Bert and I have
started isolating zircons
30
00:01:25,819 --> 00:01:28,186
from meteorites
for our dark matter search.
31
00:01:28,221 --> 00:01:29,554
Oh. Well, how nice.
32
00:01:29,589 --> 00:01:31,056
Everyone's doing
impressive work.
33
00:01:31,091 --> 00:01:32,791
What have you been
working on these days?
34
00:01:32,826 --> 00:01:35,560
Whoa, whoa. Where'd
that come from?
35
00:01:35,595 --> 00:01:37,629
Where did what come from?
(stammers)
36
00:01:37,664 --> 00:01:38,964
I try to be supportive,
37
00:01:38,999 --> 00:01:42,367
and you break out the hot
lights and the rubber hose.
38
00:01:42,402 --> 00:01:43,969
I just asked
what you've been working on.
39
00:01:44,004 --> 00:01:45,904
Oh, my God, let it go.
40
00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:47,405
Do you believe this guy?
41
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:49,942
I did it!
42
00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:54,413
See? It's a... it's a boat.
43
00:01:56,383 --> 00:02:00,185
It's also a hat.
44
00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:03,822
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
45
00:02:03,857 --> 00:02:07,092
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago, expansion started-- Wait! ♪
46
00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:08,760
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
47
00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:11,496
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
48
00:02:11,531 --> 00:02:13,999
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
49
00:02:14,034 --> 00:02:16,668
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
50
00:02:16,703 --> 00:02:18,570
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
51
00:02:18,605 --> 00:02:20,139
♪ Bang! ♪
52
00:02:27,247 --> 00:02:29,581
Okay, how do you want
to play this?
53
00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:30,849
Do you want to pretend like
nothing's bothering you
54
00:02:30,884 --> 00:02:32,784
and blow up later,
or do you just want to be
55
00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:34,686
a maniac right now?
56
00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:37,789
Nothing is bothering me.
57
00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:39,858
Fine. Be that way.
58
00:02:39,893 --> 00:02:43,929
If you want to talk,
I'll be flushing my sinuses.
59
00:02:43,964 --> 00:02:45,764
Wait.
60
00:02:45,799 --> 00:02:47,432
I have a confession.
61
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:50,235
When I berated Leonard,
62
00:02:50,270 --> 00:02:53,104
it was a clever ruse
to conceal the fact
63
00:02:53,139 --> 00:02:55,307
that I'm not
working on anything.
64
00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:57,809
Well, I think
I speak for everyone
65
00:02:57,844 --> 00:03:01,046
when I say, "No!"
66
00:03:01,081 --> 00:03:05,150
The truth is I have
nothing of interest to pursue.
67
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:07,419
Well, maybe this is
the perfect opportunity
68
00:03:07,454 --> 00:03:10,255
to take some time
for yourself and refocus.
69
00:03:10,290 --> 00:03:13,225
I'm sure you'll find something
you're excited about.
70
00:03:13,260 --> 00:03:14,960
Thank you, Amy.
71
00:03:14,995 --> 00:03:18,463
I don't know what I'd do
without you.
72
00:03:18,498 --> 00:03:21,099
Hey, can I stay here?
Sheldon kicked me out.
73
00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:23,268
Well, is everything okay?
74
00:03:23,303 --> 00:03:25,937
Yeah. He just wants
some alone time to work.
75
00:03:25,972 --> 00:03:27,105
Fine.
Make yourself at home.
76
00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:28,673
Yeah. We were just about
to watch a little TV.
77
00:03:28,708 --> 00:03:29,674
You're welcome
to join us.
78
00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:31,009
Thanks. I'll be right with you.
79
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,111
I just have to, uh,
do my neti pot.
80
00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:45,524
So what are you guys
gonna watch?
81
00:03:48,361 --> 00:03:49,995
Okay.
82
00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:52,631
Hey, uh, what do you think
we should open our show with?
83
00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:57,435
Uh, "Thor and Doctor Jones"
or "Let's Get Astrophysical"?
84
00:03:57,470 --> 00:03:59,371
I don't know. I think
we should start with something
85
00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:00,972
that gets them up on their feet.
86
00:04:01,007 --> 00:04:03,642
Maybe
"Sherlock Around the Clock."
87
00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:05,944
Great, yeah.
Uh, let's give it a try.
88
00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:08,947
(playing rock music)
89
00:04:08,982 --> 00:04:11,349
BERNADETTE (over monitor):
Halley's napping! Keep it down!
90
00:04:11,384 --> 00:04:13,118
Oh. Right. Sorry.
91
00:04:13,153 --> 00:04:16,454
It's cool.
We don't need volume to rock.
92
00:04:16,489 --> 00:04:18,623
Instead of blowing
the roof off this place,
93
00:04:18,658 --> 00:04:20,325
we can gently lift it off
94
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,728
and set it quietly down
in the backyard.
95
00:04:23,997 --> 00:04:25,163
(whispering):
Okay.
96
00:04:25,198 --> 00:04:26,731
One, two, three, four.
97
00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:28,733
(playing quietly)
98
00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:30,635
(quietly):
♪ Holmes said to Watson ♪
99
00:04:30,670 --> 00:04:32,203
♪ On Baker Street ♪
100
00:04:32,238 --> 00:04:33,838
♪ Come on, Doctor ♪
101
00:04:33,873 --> 00:04:35,707
♪ Time to move them feet ♪
102
00:04:35,742 --> 00:04:37,676
(whispers):
Sing it with us.
103
00:04:37,711 --> 00:04:39,678
♪ Sherlock, Sherlock ♪
104
00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:41,413
♪ Sherlock around the clock ♪
105
00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:42,881
(whispers):
We can't hear you.
106
00:04:42,916 --> 00:04:44,683
♪ Sherlock, Sherlock ♪
107
00:04:44,718 --> 00:04:46,818
♪ Sherlock around the clock ♪
108
00:04:46,853 --> 00:04:49,054
(Halley crying)
109
00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:51,189
BERNADETTE:
Nice going.
110
00:04:51,224 --> 00:04:53,158
Sorry. Sorry. I'll get her.
111
00:04:53,193 --> 00:04:55,060
One sec.
112
00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:56,528
(Halley continues crying)
113
00:04:56,563 --> 00:04:58,964
BERNADETTE:
You bought diapers, right?
114
00:05:00,433 --> 00:05:02,567
Be right back.
115
00:05:02,602 --> 00:05:04,569
(whispers):
Rock and roll!
116
00:05:07,574 --> 00:05:10,408
Okay. Scratch paper, check.
117
00:05:10,443 --> 00:05:12,444
Whiteboard, check.
118
00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:15,847
Chex Mix, check.
119
00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:18,950
And here we go.
(grunts)
120
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:20,352
(ringtone playing)
121
00:05:20,387 --> 00:05:22,954
Oh, dang it.
122
00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:24,556
Hello, Mother.
123
00:05:24,591 --> 00:05:26,524
Hi there, Shelly.
You will never believe
124
00:05:26,559 --> 00:05:29,361
who I ran into
at the barbecue festival.
125
00:05:29,396 --> 00:05:31,963
I am right in the middle
of some very important work.
126
00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:33,932
I don't have time for this
right now.
127
00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:36,201
Then why did you
answer the phone?
128
00:05:36,236 --> 00:05:38,269
Because you raised me
to be polite.
129
00:05:38,304 --> 00:05:39,805
Now stop bothering me.
130
00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:12,070
Hello again.
131
00:06:12,105 --> 00:06:15,073
Who did you see
at the barbecue festival?
132
00:06:15,108 --> 00:06:17,008
Mr. Watkins.
133
00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,410
Really?
134
00:06:18,445 --> 00:06:20,779
You called me and interrupted
my work to tell me
135
00:06:20,814 --> 00:06:23,515
that you ran into somebody
you could plausibly run into?
136
00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:25,817
I'm sorry, Mother,
I really need to focus here.
137
00:06:25,852 --> 00:06:27,519
I will speak to you next week.
138
00:06:27,554 --> 00:06:29,621
Okay, sweetheart.
I'll talk to you then.
139
00:06:29,656 --> 00:06:31,056
(sighs)
140
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:42,267
I thought Mr. Watkins
moved to Florida.
141
00:06:42,302 --> 00:06:45,804
He did.
He was back visiting his son.
142
00:06:45,839 --> 00:06:47,939
Oh, gosh darn it,
that is interesting.
143
00:06:47,974 --> 00:06:49,774
Was it Tommy or Joe?
144
00:06:49,809 --> 00:06:52,177
I bet it was Joe, 'cause
he and Tommy had a falling out
145
00:06:52,212 --> 00:06:54,079
over that time-share.
146
00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:58,116
You guys do anything
fun after dinner?
147
00:06:58,151 --> 00:07:00,618
Well, actually Amy came
back over and we hung out.
148
00:07:00,653 --> 00:07:02,787
Did you know that we're both
spelling bee champs?
149
00:07:02,822 --> 00:07:06,291
We stayed up for hours
trying to stump each other.
150
00:07:06,326 --> 00:07:08,126
Who won?
151
00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:10,495
Oh, she thought she had me
with "appoggiatura,"
152
00:07:10,530 --> 00:07:13,698
but I shut that down
expeditiously.
153
00:07:13,733 --> 00:07:16,301
E-X-P-E-D-I-T-I-O-U-S-L-Y.
154
00:07:16,336 --> 00:07:18,503
Expeditiously.
155
00:07:18,538 --> 00:07:22,507
Wow. I bet that made Penny
take off all of her clothes.
156
00:07:24,244 --> 00:07:27,245
Put her pajamas on and
then go to bed early.
157
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,247
At, like, 9:00.
Yeah.
158
00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:31,749
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
159
00:07:31,784 --> 00:07:33,685
Oh, are we still on
for band practice this evening?
160
00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:35,220
Oh, shoot.
161
00:07:35,255 --> 00:07:38,323
I promised I would take Halley
over to Bernadette's parents.
162
00:07:38,358 --> 00:07:40,925
Dude, the gig is,
like, next weekend.
I know.
163
00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:43,094
I'm sorry. (sighs)
I really want to do this,
164
00:07:43,129 --> 00:07:45,597
but I just don't think
I have the time.
165
00:07:45,632 --> 00:07:48,333
Okay. I-I guess
I'll have to cancel.
166
00:07:48,368 --> 00:07:51,669
Toby Greenbaum will have to
become a man without us.
167
00:07:51,704 --> 00:07:54,105
Too bad, you guys
kill at bar mitzvahs.
168
00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:56,608
And other events that
people can't leave.
169
00:07:58,711 --> 00:08:01,679
I don't want to be the one
who breaks up the band.
170
00:08:01,714 --> 00:08:04,215
You know, maybe you should...
(chuckles)
171
00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:06,050
think about replacing me.
172
00:08:06,085 --> 00:08:08,052
Okay.
I mean,
173
00:08:08,087 --> 00:08:11,189
I know it'll be hard since we...
174
00:08:11,224 --> 00:08:13,124
Oh, I bet Bert could do it.
He plays guitar.
175
00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:14,125
I'm gonna go ask him.
176
00:08:16,396 --> 00:08:20,899
I guess he forgot that
I play the cello.
177
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:24,169
I-I don't think he did.
178
00:08:25,672 --> 00:08:27,639
Okay, I think it's ready.
179
00:08:27,674 --> 00:08:29,440
Should we put on
safety goggles?
180
00:08:29,475 --> 00:08:33,144
Well, the funnest fun
is the safest fun, so yes.
181
00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:34,312
Hey.
182
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:35,313
Hi.
Hello.
183
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:38,383
Oh, Amy, you're here... again.
184
00:08:38,418 --> 00:08:40,285
Yeah, Sheldon said he needed
another night to work,
185
00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,986
so I said I'd give him
some space.
186
00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:43,421
So what's all this?
187
00:08:43,456 --> 00:08:46,090
Well, Amy and I were talking
about old science fair projects,
188
00:08:46,125 --> 00:08:47,759
and how fun it would be
to recreate them.
189
00:08:47,794 --> 00:08:49,294
We're making hot ice.
190
00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:50,562
Mm-hmm. It's pretty cool.
191
00:08:50,597 --> 00:08:52,830
(chuckles)
Nice one.
Yeah.
192
00:08:52,865 --> 00:08:54,165
Turns out we both
193
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:57,001
did this as our science fair
projects in ninth grade.
194
00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:58,736
Do you remember any of
your high school projects?
195
00:08:58,771 --> 00:09:02,307
Uh, well, I remember
telling Jenny Runyon
196
00:09:02,342 --> 00:09:04,509
that I would teach her
how to flirt with boys
197
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,177
if she put my name
on her project.
198
00:09:06,212 --> 00:09:10,415
I got an "A," she got pregnant.
199
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:13,051
Girls like you are why I had to
come straight home after school.
200
00:09:14,687 --> 00:09:17,022
Check this out.
201
00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:21,359
PENNY:
Wow, that's amazing.
202
00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:22,694
LEONARD:
Mm-hmm.
203
00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:24,662
The crystallization is
an exothermic process,
204
00:09:24,697 --> 00:09:26,264
so the ice is actually hot.
205
00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:28,266
I won first place for this.
So did I.
206
00:09:28,301 --> 00:09:30,501
I threw Jenny's baby shower.
207
00:09:30,536 --> 00:09:32,971
Oh, hey, in seventh grade,
208
00:09:33,006 --> 00:09:34,505
I built a cobra wave.
You want to do that?
209
00:09:34,540 --> 00:09:36,941
Oh, we can come up with
a wave speed formula,
210
00:09:36,976 --> 00:09:39,177
and see how accurately
we can predict the amplitude.
211
00:09:39,212 --> 00:09:40,845
Wow, I didn't think
anything could top
212
00:09:40,880 --> 00:09:44,048
last night's spelling bee,
but here comes math.
213
00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:46,718
I'm sorry, we-we don't
have to do more experiments.
214
00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:48,786
Let's do something
we can all enjoy.
215
00:09:48,821 --> 00:09:51,289
Hey, uh, you want to watch
that show you like
216
00:09:51,324 --> 00:09:55,293
where people want to buy a house
and then they do?
217
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:56,527
No, no, you guys do
your experiments.
218
00:09:56,562 --> 00:09:57,528
I'll go pick up dinner.
219
00:09:57,563 --> 00:09:58,463
Are you sure?
220
00:09:58,498 --> 00:09:59,731
Yeah, you're having science fun,
221
00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:03,001
and I don't want to interfere,
or watch you.
222
00:10:11,010 --> 00:10:13,077
Did I actually do it?
223
00:10:13,112 --> 00:10:17,015
I did. I did.
224
00:10:20,586 --> 00:10:22,854
The answer is one in 18 million.
225
00:10:22,889 --> 00:10:24,822
What is?
226
00:10:24,857 --> 00:10:28,159
The odds of you
running into Mr. Watkins.
227
00:10:28,194 --> 00:10:30,495
Oh, Shelly.
I have bad news.
228
00:10:30,530 --> 00:10:32,930
Mr. Watkins passed this morning.
229
00:10:32,965 --> 00:10:34,832
Oh.
230
00:10:34,867 --> 00:10:37,001
Oh, I'm-I'm sorry.
231
00:10:37,036 --> 00:10:39,370
I know.
What are the odds of that?
232
00:10:39,405 --> 00:10:41,406
Call you back.
233
00:10:48,047 --> 00:10:49,947
LEONARD: Now let's
calculate the amplitude!
234
00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:51,916
AMY:
All right!
235
00:10:57,757 --> 00:11:00,725
Sheldon? Sheldon? Sheldon?
236
00:11:03,730 --> 00:11:06,197
It's annoying
when you do it.
237
00:11:06,232 --> 00:11:08,299
I brought pizza.
238
00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:09,867
Oh, thank you.
239
00:11:09,902 --> 00:11:11,903
I have been working
pretty hard.
240
00:11:11,938 --> 00:11:13,204
I-I could use a break.
241
00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:14,639
What's that?
242
00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,774
Oh, yeah, that is an experiment
243
00:11:16,809 --> 00:11:19,243
to see how many parallelograms
I could draw
244
00:11:19,278 --> 00:11:20,979
while holding my breath.
245
00:11:22,415 --> 00:11:25,049
Is that where you blacked out?
246
00:11:25,084 --> 00:11:26,651
No, actually,
247
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:29,654
that's where
I blacked out.
248
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:31,089
And this?
249
00:11:31,124 --> 00:11:32,557
That is a list
250
00:11:32,592 --> 00:11:35,760
of all the different types
of natural disasters.
251
00:11:35,795 --> 00:11:37,395
"Fire-quake"?
252
00:11:37,430 --> 00:11:39,964
I made that one up.
253
00:11:39,999 --> 00:11:43,568
Which I shouldn't have,
because now I'm scared of it.
254
00:11:43,603 --> 00:11:46,237
Hey, I thought you were
working on actual science.
255
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:47,739
I am.
256
00:11:47,774 --> 00:11:50,174
I'm trying to come up with
a new approach to dark matter,
257
00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:51,976
but people keep
distracting me.
258
00:11:52,011 --> 00:11:54,579
First, my mother kept answering
the phone when I called,
259
00:11:54,614 --> 00:11:56,247
even though she knew I was busy.
260
00:11:56,282 --> 00:11:59,117
And now you show up
with my favorite shape of food--
261
00:11:59,152 --> 00:12:03,421
a circle made of triangles
served in a square box.
262
00:12:03,456 --> 00:12:05,156
Maybe I'll just eat this
in the laundry room.
263
00:12:05,191 --> 00:12:06,424
No, no. Wait.
264
00:12:06,459 --> 00:12:07,759
You don't have to go,
265
00:12:07,794 --> 00:12:10,094
as long as you sit quietly
and don't say anything.
266
00:12:10,129 --> 00:12:12,030
Fine.
(clears throat)
267
00:12:17,503 --> 00:12:19,036
Mmm.
268
00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:21,238
Good.
Mmm.
269
00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:26,344
Are you mocking me?
270
00:12:31,651 --> 00:12:35,219
Hey, you want to hear
one of my geology songs?
271
00:12:35,254 --> 00:12:37,288
So it's about rocks?
272
00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:39,957
Better. It's about a boulder.
273
00:12:39,992 --> 00:12:41,859
Isn't that the same thing?
274
00:12:41,894 --> 00:12:43,327
Far from it.
275
00:12:43,362 --> 00:12:47,398
A boulder has a diameter
greater than 25.6 centimeters.
276
00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:49,333
Is that fact in the song?
277
00:12:49,368 --> 00:12:50,235
No.
278
00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:52,737
Yes.
279
00:12:54,674 --> 00:12:56,574
It's sung from the viewpoint
of the boulder
280
00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:58,409
that chases Indiana Jones.
281
00:12:58,444 --> 00:13:00,678
That's right up our alley.
Let's hear it.
282
00:13:00,713 --> 00:13:01,679
Okay.
283
00:13:01,714 --> 00:13:04,248
(playing rock music)
284
00:13:04,283 --> 00:13:09,654
♪ Alone in my temple
in the middle of Peru ♪
285
00:13:09,689 --> 00:13:12,857
♪ A giant stone ball
with nothing much to do ♪
286
00:13:12,892 --> 00:13:15,993
♪ But if you steal my idol ♪
287
00:13:16,028 --> 00:13:19,330
♪ I will roll right over you ♪
288
00:13:19,365 --> 00:13:23,835
♪ 'Cause I'm six tons of
granite and micaceous schist ♪
289
00:13:23,870 --> 00:13:27,338
♪ Yeah,
I'm six tons of granite and ♪
290
00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:28,940
BOTH:
♪ Micaceous schist ♪
291
00:13:28,975 --> 00:13:33,077
♪ Yeah, I'm six tons of granite
and, uh, micaceous schist ♪
292
00:13:33,112 --> 00:13:35,379
♪ Yeah, I'm six tons
of granite ♪
293
00:13:35,414 --> 00:13:38,015
♪ And, uh, micaceous schist ♪
294
00:13:38,050 --> 00:13:39,350
♪ Yeah, I'm six... ♪
295
00:13:39,385 --> 00:13:41,018
So, I think if we want
296
00:13:41,053 --> 00:13:43,788
to predict the height
of the wave, we need to use
297
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:46,190
elasticity theory
and model the lattice
298
00:13:46,225 --> 00:13:48,192
as one continuous
flexible piece.
299
00:13:48,227 --> 00:13:49,694
This is fun.
Mm-hmm.
300
00:13:49,729 --> 00:13:51,696
Playing with Popsicle sticks,
301
00:13:51,731 --> 00:13:54,065
exploring ways
to store kinetic energy.
302
00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:56,634
It's like preschool
all over again.
303
00:13:56,669 --> 00:13:59,403
Except now if I eat paste,
it's because I want to,
304
00:13:59,438 --> 00:14:02,373
not because
Craig Schultz is making me.
305
00:14:02,408 --> 00:14:04,809
Hey, can I ask you a question?
306
00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:06,377
Is it, "Where was the teacher?"
307
00:14:06,412 --> 00:14:09,380
She was in the bathroom smoking,
that's where.
308
00:14:09,415 --> 00:14:13,718
It wasn't, but I'm glad
to see you've moved on.
309
00:14:13,753 --> 00:14:16,554
I was gonna ask if being married
felt any different.
310
00:14:16,589 --> 00:14:20,124
Oh. Uh... not really.
311
00:14:20,159 --> 00:14:22,927
Sorry. That probably wasn't
the answer you were looking for.
312
00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:24,428
No, actually it is.
313
00:14:24,463 --> 00:14:27,732
I mean, Sheldon and I are in
a really great place right now,
314
00:14:27,767 --> 00:14:30,434
and I just, I don't want
anything to mess that up.
315
00:14:30,469 --> 00:14:32,570
Mm-hmm.
You do remember you're here
316
00:14:32,605 --> 00:14:35,573
because he kicked you
out of your apartment?
317
00:14:35,608 --> 00:14:36,908
Yes.
318
00:14:36,943 --> 00:14:38,910
His work is important to him.
319
00:14:38,945 --> 00:14:40,945
It's one of the
things I find
320
00:14:40,980 --> 00:14:42,413
the sexiest about him.
321
00:14:42,448 --> 00:14:44,682
Well, that and...
Aah!
322
00:14:50,456 --> 00:14:52,190
...his butt.
323
00:14:54,994 --> 00:14:56,527
And then I was
thinking about
324
00:14:56,562 --> 00:14:58,629
inventing a new
dark matter particle
325
00:14:58,664 --> 00:15:00,531
to evade the omega
baryon constraints,
326
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:02,133
but that just seems
like something
327
00:15:02,168 --> 00:15:03,668
anyone could
come up with.
328
00:15:03,703 --> 00:15:05,937
Mm. Agreed.
329
00:15:05,972 --> 00:15:07,438
(clears throat)
330
00:15:07,473 --> 00:15:09,440
You know
what's blowing my mind?
331
00:15:09,475 --> 00:15:14,111
Somebody thought about
putting cheese in this crust.
332
00:15:14,146 --> 00:15:18,549
I just wish I could find
something that excites me.
333
00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:20,551
You do understand
that crust doesn't normally
334
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,020
come with cheese in it?
335
00:15:23,322 --> 00:15:25,156
Okay, all right, look.
336
00:15:25,191 --> 00:15:27,725
What got you excited about
dark matter in the first place?
337
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:31,329
Well, I left
string theory,
338
00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:33,230
which I'd been working
on for a long time,
339
00:15:33,265 --> 00:15:35,833
and everyone was talking about
how cool dark matter was,
340
00:15:35,868 --> 00:15:38,903
and I thought, "Well, sure,
I'll give that a whirl."
341
00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:42,473
So it's your rebound science?
342
00:15:42,508 --> 00:15:43,975
What's that?
343
00:15:44,010 --> 00:15:47,078
Well, not the science you spend
the rest of your life with,
344
00:15:47,113 --> 00:15:50,415
but the one you use to make
yourself feel pretty again.
345
00:15:52,351 --> 00:15:54,251
Well, if I'm being honest,
346
00:15:54,286 --> 00:15:56,253
I never forgot about
string theory.
347
00:15:56,288 --> 00:15:58,189
It's remarkable.
348
00:15:58,224 --> 00:16:00,591
It's the closest we've come
to a theory of everything,
349
00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:03,160
something even Einstein
couldn't figure out.
350
00:16:03,195 --> 00:16:07,031
Well, if he couldn't figure
it out, maybe it's just wrong.
351
00:16:07,066 --> 00:16:08,766
But it's so elegant.
352
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:12,403
I mean, look,
string theory posits
353
00:16:12,438 --> 00:16:15,006
that the fundamental particles
we see in three dimensions
354
00:16:15,041 --> 00:16:20,511
are actually strings embedded
in multidimensional space-time.
355
00:16:20,546 --> 00:16:24,248
Interesting.
356
00:16:24,283 --> 00:16:26,784
So that would mean...
357
00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,753
that...
358
00:16:30,322 --> 00:16:32,256
Can't do this by myself, buddy.
359
00:16:35,061 --> 00:16:36,961
(keyboard keys clacking rapidly)
360
00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:45,369
What is happening?
361
00:16:45,404 --> 00:16:47,872
I was trying
not to wake you.
362
00:16:47,907 --> 00:16:50,207
Did it work?
363
00:16:50,242 --> 00:16:52,076
Sorry.
364
00:16:52,111 --> 00:16:53,878
I just realized,
365
00:16:53,913 --> 00:16:57,782
now that I'm not in the band,
I can focus on my own music.
366
00:16:57,817 --> 00:17:00,885
You know? Go solo.
367
00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:03,554
You said you were
taking a break from the band
368
00:17:03,589 --> 00:17:05,322
to help with me and the baby.
369
00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:08,926
Yes, and write
an astronaut musical.
370
00:17:08,961 --> 00:17:11,462
Picture this.
The curtain opens.
371
00:17:11,497 --> 00:17:13,564
There's a lone astronaut
floating
372
00:17:13,599 --> 00:17:15,232
in the inky blackness
of space.
373
00:17:15,267 --> 00:17:17,268
Maybe wires, maybe fog.
374
00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:19,570
I'll let the director
figure that out.
375
00:17:19,605 --> 00:17:23,908
♪ I really don't know when ♪
376
00:17:23,943 --> 00:17:29,347
♪ I'll run out of oxy... gen. ♪
377
00:17:31,283 --> 00:17:33,918
Good news!
I'm back in the band!
378
00:17:33,953 --> 00:17:36,253
So, Bernadette doesn't mind?
379
00:17:36,288 --> 00:17:37,989
It was her idea!
380
00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:43,861
So it's sort of like
a guitar string,
381
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:45,930
but instead of making
an actual sound,
382
00:17:45,965 --> 00:17:48,099
each vibration is
a different particle.
383
00:17:48,134 --> 00:17:51,635
Precisely. And when
you express it in 11 dimensions,
384
00:17:51,670 --> 00:17:53,604
Einstein's relativity equations
pop out.
385
00:17:53,639 --> 00:17:55,206
Does that sound
like a coincidence?
386
00:17:55,241 --> 00:17:56,974
It does not.
Yup.
387
00:17:57,009 --> 00:17:59,276
That's what I think.
388
00:17:59,311 --> 00:18:02,480
So, so, did we do it?
Did we just solve string theory?
389
00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:03,881
Oh. (laughs)
390
00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:05,649
I appreciate
your enthusiasm,
391
00:18:05,684 --> 00:18:07,518
but this is not
the sort of thing
392
00:18:07,553 --> 00:18:09,153
we can figure
out in a night.
393
00:18:09,188 --> 00:18:11,622
People have been
stuck on this for decades.
394
00:18:11,657 --> 00:18:12,990
Well, decades? Really?
395
00:18:13,025 --> 00:18:15,560
It's-it's a string.
How hard can it be?
396
00:18:16,829 --> 00:18:18,195
It's straight, it's in a loop,
397
00:18:18,230 --> 00:18:20,397
it gets knotted up
with other strings. Uh...
398
00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:22,166
Well, actually
there are no knots
399
00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:23,834
in anything greater
than four dimensions.
400
00:18:23,869 --> 00:18:26,003
Ooh, unless
401
00:18:26,038 --> 00:18:30,741
we get around that by
considering them as sheets.
402
00:18:30,776 --> 00:18:32,643
You know,
topologically speaking,
403
00:18:32,678 --> 00:18:35,746
that has a lot
of interesting possibilities.
404
00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:38,416
See? How long did that take me,
like a minute?
405
00:18:44,190 --> 00:18:45,489
Thought you were
getting us dinner.
406
00:18:45,524 --> 00:18:47,158
Sorry.
I had to stop at Sheldon's
407
00:18:47,193 --> 00:18:49,093
and help him solve
string theory.
408
00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:55,833
What?
409
00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:58,936
Yeah, turns out
the answer's knots.
410
00:18:58,971 --> 00:19:00,838
That's cute,
but you can't have knots
411
00:19:00,873 --> 00:19:02,373
in more than four dimensions.
412
00:19:02,408 --> 00:19:05,543
Mm, you can if
you consider them sheets.
413
00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:06,978
Good night.
414
00:19:17,089 --> 00:19:20,291
What up,
my Hebrews and She-brews?!
415
00:19:22,228 --> 00:19:25,729
We are Footprints
on the Moon.
416
00:19:25,764 --> 00:19:27,565
KOOTHRAPPALI:
Toby, today you are a man,
417
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:30,201
and you will face
many obstacles in life.
418
00:19:30,236 --> 00:19:33,938
And some of those obstacles
are gonna feel like boulders.
419
00:19:35,841 --> 00:19:38,809
This first song is about
the greatest boulder
420
00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:41,145
in the history of cinema.
421
00:19:42,414 --> 00:19:44,481
One, two, three.
422
00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:46,817
(rock music playing)
423
00:19:49,421 --> 00:19:53,824
♪ Alone in my temple
in the middle of Peru ♪
424
00:19:53,859 --> 00:19:58,062
♪ A giant stone ball
with nothing to do ♪
425
00:19:58,097 --> 00:20:01,165
♪ But if you steal my idol ♪
426
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:05,269
♪ I will roll right over you ♪
427
00:20:05,304 --> 00:20:07,838
♪ 'Cause I'm six tons
of granite ♪
428
00:20:07,873 --> 00:20:09,840
♪ And micaceous schist ♪
429
00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:12,676
♪ Yeah, I'm six tons
of granite ♪
430
00:20:12,711 --> 00:20:15,146
♪ And micaceous schist ♪
431
00:20:16,982 --> 00:20:19,817
(shouting):
♪ I'm gonna crush you,
I'm gonna mush you ♪
432
00:20:19,852 --> 00:20:21,785
♪ You took my idol,
I'm homicidal ♪
433
00:20:21,820 --> 00:20:24,355
♪ Gonna roll over you
till your brains come out ♪
434
00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:27,124
♪ And your bones will crunch
and your blood will spout! ♪
435
00:20:28,794 --> 00:20:31,795
I'm not just a rock, baby.
I'm a boulder.
436
00:20:31,830 --> 00:20:33,564
(yelling wildly)
437
00:20:37,636 --> 00:20:40,604
♪ 'Cause I'm six tons
of granite ♪
438
00:20:40,639 --> 00:20:42,139
♪ And micaceous schist ♪
439
00:20:42,174 --> 00:20:44,808
♪ Yeah, I'm six tons
of granite ♪
440
00:20:44,843 --> 00:20:47,044
♪ And micaceous schist ♪
441
00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:49,313
♪ Yeah, I'm six tons
of granite... ♪