1
00:00:02,602 --> 00:00:04,169
That's not right.
2
00:00:04,204 --> 00:00:05,804
That's so unreasonable.
3
00:00:05,839 --> 00:00:07,806
Yeah, well, if you're going
to be like this,
4
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:10,142
then I don't want to talk
to you right now, either.
5
00:00:10,177 --> 00:00:12,944
Okay. I love you. Bye.
6
00:00:12,979 --> 00:00:15,781
Amazon customer support?
7
00:00:15,816 --> 00:00:17,849
No, my mother.
8
00:00:17,884 --> 00:00:21,019
Guess who she's insisting
we invite to our wedding.
9
00:00:21,054 --> 00:00:22,754
Jesus?
10
00:00:22,789 --> 00:00:24,723
If only.
11
00:00:24,758 --> 00:00:26,525
My brother.
12
00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:28,827
Wait a minute.
You didn't invite your brother
13
00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:30,228
to your own wedding?
14
00:00:30,263 --> 00:00:32,597
He tormented me
my whole childhood.
15
00:00:32,632 --> 00:00:33,832
I don't think
I should reward
16
00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:35,167
that type of behavior
17
00:00:35,202 --> 00:00:36,701
with a slice of wedding cake
in the shape
18
00:00:36,736 --> 00:00:38,537
of the Millennium Falcon.
19
00:00:38,572 --> 00:00:40,338
Try again.
20
00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:43,242
A slice of wedding cake
in the shape of a cake.
21
00:00:44,644 --> 00:00:47,312
Look, he may have been mean
to you when you were kids,
22
00:00:47,347 --> 00:00:49,414
but you're both grown men now.
23
00:00:49,449 --> 00:00:51,149
That's right.
I'm a grown-up,
24
00:00:51,184 --> 00:00:53,952
and if I don't want to invite
him to my wedding, then I won't.
25
00:00:53,987 --> 00:00:55,487
Okay.
26
00:00:55,522 --> 00:00:58,924
Except I have to 'cause
my mommy's making me.
27
00:00:58,959 --> 00:01:02,627
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
28
00:01:02,662 --> 00:01:06,064
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
29
00:01:06,099 --> 00:01:07,599
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
30
00:01:07,634 --> 00:01:10,168
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
31
00:01:10,203 --> 00:01:12,771
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
32
00:01:12,806 --> 00:01:15,507
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
33
00:01:15,542 --> 00:01:17,442
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
34
00:01:17,477 --> 00:01:19,311
♪ Bang! ♪
35
00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:27,219
Okay, so each welcome bag
gets a schedule of events,
36
00:01:27,254 --> 00:01:29,254
a map, and
chocolate from me.
37
00:01:29,289 --> 00:01:33,592
And from Sheldon,
a bottle of Purell...
38
00:01:33,627 --> 00:01:36,061
...the number for Poison
Control in case someone
39
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:37,662
accidentally drinks the Purell,
40
00:01:37,697 --> 00:01:39,531
and a laminated
41
00:01:39,566 --> 00:01:42,167
table of elements because
the American school system
42
00:01:42,202 --> 00:01:44,302
is a failure.
43
00:01:44,337 --> 00:01:47,005
How many out-of-town guests
are there gonna be?
44
00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:48,240
I'm actually not sure.
45
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:50,175
Turns out Sheldon
didn't invite his brother.
46
00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:52,944
Mm. Now it's starting
to sound like a wedding.
47
00:01:52,979 --> 00:01:55,814
And his mom said she won't come
if his brother's not there.
48
00:01:55,849 --> 00:01:58,550
Ooh, now it's starting to sound
like a good wedding.
49
00:02:00,053 --> 00:02:01,253
WOLOWITZ:
Hey, Bernie. Hey.
50
00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:04,055
How do you know
if someone has pink eye?
51
00:02:04,090 --> 00:02:07,759
Um, their eye would be red,
swollen and probably oozy.
52
00:02:07,794 --> 00:02:09,461
Okay, thanks.
53
00:02:09,496 --> 00:02:11,496
Both kids have pink eye.
54
00:02:11,531 --> 00:02:12,430
Oh, no.
55
00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:13,965
You stop right there.
56
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:15,433
I'm getting married in a week;
57
00:02:15,468 --> 00:02:17,169
you are not giving me pink eye.
58
00:02:17,204 --> 00:02:18,637
I don't have pink eye.
59
00:02:18,672 --> 00:02:20,839
Hey! Hey. Hey.
60
00:02:20,874 --> 00:02:22,407
Step away from the bride.
61
00:02:22,442 --> 00:02:25,510
(chuckles): Okay.
I'll go back upstairs.
62
00:02:25,545 --> 00:02:27,312
Get in the shower and then take
those clothes and burn them.
63
00:02:27,347 --> 00:02:29,715
Yeah, and all the rest
of your clothes!
64
00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:33,185
Ah, worth a shot.
65
00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:39,691
So am I gonna be, like, the only
single guy at Sheldon's wedding?
66
00:02:39,726 --> 00:02:40,725
No.
67
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:42,327
There-There'll be a lot
of single people there.
68
00:02:42,362 --> 00:02:45,463
Stuart, Amy's great-aunt...
69
00:02:45,498 --> 00:02:48,099
Although, Stuart's already
friended her on Facebook,
70
00:02:48,134 --> 00:02:50,769
so, better move quick.
71
00:02:50,804 --> 00:02:52,437
I got to find a date.
72
00:02:52,472 --> 00:02:54,339
I don't want to be
that sad single friend
73
00:02:54,374 --> 00:02:55,674
that everyone looks at
with pity.
74
00:02:55,709 --> 00:02:59,578
Uh, I'm-I'm afraid
that ship may have sailed.
75
00:03:01,248 --> 00:03:02,447
Leonard,
76
00:03:02,482 --> 00:03:04,449
you have a brother,
right?
77
00:03:04,484 --> 00:03:05,317
Yes.
78
00:03:05,352 --> 00:03:06,451
Is he the worst?
79
00:03:06,486 --> 00:03:08,086
Is he an unspeakable
abomination?
80
00:03:08,121 --> 00:03:11,089
Does the very thought of him
make your skin crawl?
81
00:03:11,124 --> 00:03:13,258
Well, he laughs
at his own jokes,
82
00:03:13,293 --> 00:03:15,093
but otherwise he's okay.
83
00:03:15,128 --> 00:03:16,695
Sheldon, what's going on?
84
00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:19,497
I'm trying to invite
my stupid brother to my wedding
85
00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:20,899
and he's avoiding my calls.
86
00:03:20,934 --> 00:03:23,302
You don't know he's
avoiding your calls.
87
00:03:25,739 --> 00:03:27,339
(line ringing)
88
00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,974
GEORGE JR.: Hey, you've reached
George Cooper.
89
00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:31,042
Please leave a message,
unless this is Sheldon again,
90
00:03:31,077 --> 00:03:33,745
in which case, please try me
on my other number,
91
00:03:33,780 --> 00:03:36,882
1-800-suck-it.
92
00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:40,385
See?
93
00:03:40,420 --> 00:03:42,220
And I know that's not
a real number
94
00:03:42,255 --> 00:03:43,989
because why would it be
toll-free?
95
00:03:45,292 --> 00:03:46,725
Sheldon, you tried.
96
00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:48,026
What more could you have done?
97
00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:49,861
Hey, why didn't you invite
him in the first place?
98
00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:52,530
You don't know what it was like
growing up with him.
99
00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:55,533
I get it; I grew up
with lots of brothers.
100
00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,502
My brother Adoot was
especially mean.
101
00:03:57,537 --> 00:03:59,304
Really? I've never
heard you mention Adoot.
102
00:03:59,339 --> 00:04:00,805
Yeah, sure I have.
103
00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,141
He's the one who left the door
open when we were kids,
104
00:04:03,176 --> 00:04:04,876
and my pet mongoose ran away.
105
00:04:06,046 --> 00:04:09,014
Stupid Adoot.
106
00:04:09,049 --> 00:04:11,850
Look, uh, short of getting
on a plane and flying there,
107
00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:13,819
what does your mother
expect you to do?
108
00:04:17,290 --> 00:04:18,490
I kept saying no.
109
00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:21,593
H-H-How am I here?
110
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:23,828
Hey, did I tell you?
111
00:04:23,863 --> 00:04:25,230
I found a date.
To the wedding?
112
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:26,598
Uh, to coffee.
113
00:04:26,633 --> 00:04:29,534
But if things go well,
Sheldon and Amy's wedding.
114
00:04:29,569 --> 00:04:31,670
Aren't you worried
it's a little intense
115
00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:34,306
to ask someone you just met
to go to a wedding?
116
00:04:34,341 --> 00:04:36,708
(sighs)
I'm running
out of time.
117
00:04:36,743 --> 00:04:38,443
Wh-Wh-Why can't there be
a service where you can
118
00:04:38,478 --> 00:04:41,880
just pay someone to be
your date for the evening?
119
00:04:44,250 --> 00:04:45,617
Like an escort service?
120
00:04:45,652 --> 00:04:48,320
No, no, no. Y-You wouldn't
be paying for sex.
121
00:04:48,355 --> 00:04:49,621
I mean, obviously if
things went well,
122
00:04:49,656 --> 00:04:52,457
it could lead to sex,
but, but the money is for,
123
00:04:52,492 --> 00:04:54,492
like, you know, her time
and companionship.
124
00:04:54,527 --> 00:04:58,563
Oh, I get it...
an escort service.
125
00:04:58,598 --> 00:05:00,198
Stop saying that.
126
00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:01,566
Stop meaning it.
127
00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:05,270
WOLOWITZ:
Hey, Raj, remember
when you borrowed
128
00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:07,172
my VR goggles the other day?
129
00:05:07,207 --> 00:05:08,606
Yeah.
130
00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:11,310
(sighs)
Probably shouldn't
have done that.
131
00:05:16,950 --> 00:05:20,218
So, wait, y-your
brother is Dr. Tire?
132
00:05:20,253 --> 00:05:21,653
Yes, and, apparently,
133
00:05:21,688 --> 00:05:23,788
it only takes half a semester
of community college
134
00:05:23,823 --> 00:05:26,491
to get that
particular doctorate.
135
00:05:26,526 --> 00:05:28,927
We passed three
of these stores on the way here.
136
00:05:28,962 --> 00:05:32,630
Why did you say he's just
"some loser who sells tires"?
137
00:05:32,665 --> 00:05:34,299
You're right,
that was unfair.
138
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,501
He's a loser who
sells more tires
139
00:05:36,536 --> 00:05:38,670
than anyone in Texas.
140
00:05:41,307 --> 00:05:43,241
Oh, excuse me.
141
00:05:43,276 --> 00:05:44,342
Uh, we're looking
for a Georgie Cooper.
142
00:05:44,377 --> 00:05:47,446
One second, I'll check to see
if the doctor's in.
143
00:05:48,415 --> 00:05:50,115
He is not
a doctor.
144
00:05:50,150 --> 00:05:54,352
(scoffs) There's only
one doctor here and it's me.
145
00:05:54,387 --> 00:05:55,787
I'm also a doctor.
146
00:05:55,822 --> 00:05:57,322
Do you want to wait
in the car?
147
00:05:57,357 --> 00:06:00,492
I wanted to wait
in California.
148
00:06:01,227 --> 00:06:04,329
So, is this Georgie?
149
00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:06,264
Yes.
150
00:06:06,299 --> 00:06:07,699
And what is
he even using
151
00:06:07,734 --> 00:06:09,801
that stethoscope
to listen to?
152
00:06:09,836 --> 00:06:12,404
I don't know, small leak?
153
00:06:12,439 --> 00:06:15,640
All right,
that makes sense.
154
00:06:17,243 --> 00:06:19,911
What the hell
are you doing here?
155
00:06:19,946 --> 00:06:20,645
Hello, Georgie.
156
00:06:20,680 --> 00:06:22,414
It's just George now.
157
00:06:22,449 --> 00:06:24,516
Fine, George.
158
00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:26,718
No, I don't like it-- Georgie.
159
00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:28,686
I see you haven't
changed one bit.
160
00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:31,089
Thank you, that is
a nice thing to say.
161
00:06:32,325 --> 00:06:33,358
Hey, I'm Leonard.
162
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:36,294
I'm here for-for
no reason.
163
00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:38,696
What do you want, Sheldon?
164
00:06:38,731 --> 00:06:40,465
Why aren't you returning
my phone calls?
165
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:42,033
You're supposed to
be the smart one;
166
00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:44,369
you figure it out.
167
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:45,703
He's not that kind
of smart.
168
00:06:45,738 --> 00:06:47,606
You might want
to give him a hint.
169
00:06:48,608 --> 00:06:50,275
We haven't talked
170
00:06:50,310 --> 00:06:52,544
in over ten years, and now
that you need something,
171
00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:54,312
you think you can just
show up at my store?
172
00:06:54,347 --> 00:06:55,613
Well, let's just
drop everything
173
00:06:55,648 --> 00:06:57,382
to accommodate Sheldon.
174
00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:59,017
Nice try,
175
00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:01,319
but I am not a gullible
little boy anymore.
176
00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:04,255
I can recognize sarcasm.
177
00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:05,590
Okay. You're right.
178
00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:07,091
I'm-I'm-I'm sorry.
179
00:07:07,126 --> 00:07:08,226
Tell me what you need.
180
00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:10,128
Your wish is my command.
181
00:07:10,163 --> 00:07:11,530
That's better, thank you.
182
00:07:15,068 --> 00:07:17,002
(Skype ringing)
183
00:07:19,072 --> 00:07:20,472
Oh, my God.
184
00:07:24,310 --> 00:07:25,476
Yeah, I got it, too.
185
00:07:25,511 --> 00:07:28,847
Wow. You really can't keep
your hands off Howard, can you?
186
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:31,783
I know, I have a problem.
187
00:07:31,818 --> 00:07:34,486
I just wanted to make sure
you and Amy didn't get it.
188
00:07:34,521 --> 00:07:36,855
(quietly):
Well, I didn't get it.
189
00:07:38,157 --> 00:07:41,159
You infected me a week
before my wedding.
190
00:07:42,662 --> 00:07:45,230
What am I supposed
to do about this?
191
00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:47,832
Wear a veil?
192
00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:49,667
(laughs)
193
00:07:49,702 --> 00:07:51,670
It's not funny.
194
00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:54,806
Look at what
you've done to me!
195
00:07:54,841 --> 00:07:56,174
Ah, hey.
196
00:07:56,209 --> 00:07:58,877
Could you just, like,
not touch my computer
197
00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:02,046
or... like, anything
else. I just, ugh,
198
00:08:02,081 --> 00:08:04,583
I don't want to look like that
in your wedding photos.
199
00:08:06,853 --> 00:08:08,486
There aren't gonna be
any wedding photos.
200
00:08:08,521 --> 00:08:10,388
My fiancé's a germophobe.
201
00:08:10,423 --> 00:08:11,656
If he finds out
I'm contagious,
202
00:08:11,691 --> 00:08:13,691
he'll never
come back from Texas.
203
00:08:13,726 --> 00:08:16,728
What if we tell him the theme
of the wedding is Walking Dead
204
00:08:16,763 --> 00:08:19,664
and this is our zombie makeup?
205
00:08:19,699 --> 00:08:21,132
That'll probably work.
206
00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:22,534
We'll call that plan B.
207
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:27,539
Oh, well... (clears throat)
208
00:08:27,574 --> 00:08:29,975
Turns out this is gonna
come in handy after all.
209
00:08:32,946 --> 00:08:34,979
Hold up.
I-I'm confused.
210
00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:36,881
You didn't want me
at your wedding,
211
00:08:36,916 --> 00:08:38,550
but now
that Mom won't come,
212
00:08:38,585 --> 00:08:39,684
you want me there.
213
00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:41,953
I know you don't
hear this a lot,
214
00:08:41,988 --> 00:08:43,955
but that is exactly right.
215
00:08:43,990 --> 00:08:45,624
Good job.
216
00:08:46,893 --> 00:08:48,493
Not helping, Sheldon.
217
00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:50,328
Listen here,
218
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:51,963
you want me at your wedding,
219
00:08:51,998 --> 00:08:54,132
all you got to do is ask nicely.
220
00:08:54,167 --> 00:08:56,234
(sighs)
221
00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:58,336
Georgie.
George.
222
00:08:58,371 --> 00:09:00,305
(groans)
223
00:09:01,474 --> 00:09:05,243
I would like you
at my wedding.
224
00:09:05,278 --> 00:09:06,878
Thank you, Sheldon.
225
00:09:06,913 --> 00:09:09,814
That is so nice to hear.
226
00:09:09,849 --> 00:09:12,183
But I would rather swallow
a pregnant wildcat
227
00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:15,287
and crap out
a litter of kittens.
228
00:09:17,156 --> 00:09:19,991
It is fitting that
you got into tires,
229
00:09:20,026 --> 00:09:22,260
because you are tiresome.
230
00:09:23,363 --> 00:09:25,297
Sheldon, come on.
231
00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:27,599
Was that too mean?
232
00:09:27,634 --> 00:09:30,268
No, not too mean,
not too good either.
233
00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:37,241
No, Mother.
That's not fair.
234
00:09:37,276 --> 00:09:39,043
But he told...
235
00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:41,145
Yes, ma'am.
236
00:09:41,180 --> 00:09:42,780
But I said...
237
00:09:42,815 --> 00:09:45,049
Yes, ma'am.
238
00:09:45,084 --> 00:09:46,751
Good-bye.
239
00:09:46,786 --> 00:09:48,753
What'd she say?
240
00:09:48,788 --> 00:09:50,888
She's not getting
in the middle of it because
241
00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:53,691
we "boys need
to work it out ourselves."
242
00:09:53,726 --> 00:09:55,493
Oh, maybe it's fine if
243
00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:57,161
she doesn't come to the wedding.
244
00:09:57,196 --> 00:09:58,363
I've got Amy now,
245
00:09:58,398 --> 00:10:02,000
and she can do everything
a mom can do and more.
246
00:10:02,035 --> 00:10:04,302
Say that to her
on the wedding night.
247
00:10:04,337 --> 00:10:06,371
Really spice things up.
248
00:10:06,406 --> 00:10:08,940
This is all Georgie's fault.
249
00:10:08,975 --> 00:10:11,376
My whole childhood,
he was mean to me.
250
00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:14,278
Sorry. I know what it's like
to live with a bully.
251
00:10:14,313 --> 00:10:16,381
Your brother bullied you?
252
00:10:16,416 --> 00:10:19,584
Oh, I was talking about Penny,
but sure, yeah.
253
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,152
Once, when I was eight,
254
00:10:21,187 --> 00:10:22,887
I was going to dress
as my favorite scientist
255
00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:25,923
for Halloween, and
Georgie threw my costume away.
256
00:10:25,958 --> 00:10:27,258
I had to wear a sheet
257
00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:29,060
and go as a ghost.
258
00:10:29,095 --> 00:10:30,962
Scared myself all night long.
259
00:10:32,899 --> 00:10:35,199
Well, look, we don't fly
out until the morning.
260
00:10:35,234 --> 00:10:38,336
Why don't I try and talk to him,
give it one more shot?
261
00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:41,139
All right.
262
00:10:41,174 --> 00:10:42,940
But if he says,
263
00:10:42,975 --> 00:10:45,777
"Nerd says what,"
don't answer him.
What?
264
00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,679
You are a lamb to the slaughter.
265
00:10:50,850 --> 00:10:52,751
So, how was
your date?
266
00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:59,424
It was going well until my eye
dripped in her latte.
267
00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:04,095
We're so sorry
we ruined your date.
268
00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:05,964
Oh, boo-hoo.
269
00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:08,332
His date got ruined.
270
00:11:08,367 --> 00:11:11,235
I'm about to get married,
and look at me.
271
00:11:11,270 --> 00:11:13,438
It looks like it's
getting better.
272
00:11:13,473 --> 00:11:14,506
Oh, does it?
273
00:11:14,541 --> 00:11:18,143
Does it look like that
with your two clear eyes?
274
00:11:20,012 --> 00:11:22,280
I'm sorry. Are you mad
that I don't have pink eye?
275
00:11:22,315 --> 00:11:24,015
What do you think?
BOTH:
Yes!
276
00:11:26,953 --> 00:11:28,853
Uh-huh. Okay.
(knocking)
277
00:11:28,888 --> 00:11:32,090
Okay. Uh, uh,
listen, I hear you.
278
00:11:32,125 --> 00:11:35,827
I know they're pricey,
but these are the Dallas Cowboys
279
00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:37,729
of tires, okay?
280
00:11:37,764 --> 00:11:39,197
And we're talking
the Troy Aikman Cowboys,
281
00:11:39,232 --> 00:11:41,366
not that pretty boy Tony Romo.
282
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:44,268
All right. Good call.
283
00:11:44,303 --> 00:11:45,870
You won't regret it.
284
00:11:45,905 --> 00:11:48,139
Boom!
(laughs)
285
00:11:48,174 --> 00:11:49,774
Wow. That was impressive.
Yeah.
286
00:11:49,809 --> 00:11:51,876
Well, it's easy
when you love your product
287
00:11:51,911 --> 00:11:54,145
and hate Tony Romo.
288
00:11:54,180 --> 00:11:55,546
(laughs)
289
00:11:55,581 --> 00:11:57,181
Yeah, that guy's the...
290
00:11:57,216 --> 00:12:00,218
Actually, I don't,
I don't know who that guy is.
291
00:12:00,253 --> 00:12:03,921
If you are here about
Sheldon's wedding, don't bother.
292
00:12:03,956 --> 00:12:06,824
Come on. I-I know
you two have your differences.
293
00:12:06,859 --> 00:12:08,826
You mean pretty much everything
about us?
294
00:12:08,861 --> 00:12:10,528
Well, not everything.
(laughs)
295
00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:14,499
You're both tall, you
have the same last name.
296
00:12:14,534 --> 00:12:17,935
Maybe I shouldn't have
started this like it was a list.
297
00:12:17,970 --> 00:12:20,905
You have no idea
what you are talking about.
298
00:12:20,940 --> 00:12:23,908
Ooh, there--
that-that was very Sheldon.
299
00:12:25,545 --> 00:12:29,147
Look, I-I'm sure he was not
the easiest brother to have,
300
00:12:29,182 --> 00:12:30,715
but it wasn't easy
for him either,
301
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,650
with you picking on him
all the time.
302
00:12:32,685 --> 00:12:34,185
(laughing)
303
00:12:34,220 --> 00:12:37,088
Picking on him?
Is that what he told you?
304
00:12:37,123 --> 00:12:38,823
Well, what about the time
305
00:12:38,858 --> 00:12:40,758
you threw away
his Halloween costume?
306
00:12:40,793 --> 00:12:45,196
Well, yeah, 'cause he was gonna
dress as some girl scientist.
307
00:12:46,566 --> 00:12:48,500
Madame Curie?
308
00:12:49,869 --> 00:12:52,203
Oh, I didn't know
she was a madam.
309
00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:56,874
Come on. He was still gonna get
beat up for wearing that dress.
310
00:12:56,909 --> 00:12:58,509
Well, didn't you sit on his head
311
00:12:58,544 --> 00:13:00,344
while he tried
to watch Star Trek?
312
00:13:00,379 --> 00:13:03,614
Well, yeah,
but that was hilarious.
313
00:13:03,649 --> 00:13:06,284
That is pretty hilarious, yeah.
314
00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:07,919
Look, I mean,
315
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:09,987
I always looked out
for him at school.
316
00:13:10,022 --> 00:13:11,489
I drove him everywhere.
317
00:13:11,524 --> 00:13:13,891
I apologized to people
when he was rude.
318
00:13:13,926 --> 00:13:15,827
Yeah. I've
done all that.
319
00:13:15,862 --> 00:13:17,728
I've also removed all
320
00:13:17,763 --> 00:13:19,530
the red balloons
from his Lucky Charms
321
00:13:19,565 --> 00:13:22,133
because they weren't
"Irish enough."
All right.
322
00:13:22,168 --> 00:13:23,901
So you know
what I'm talking about.
323
00:13:23,936 --> 00:13:25,469
And has he ever thanked you?
324
00:13:25,504 --> 00:13:27,905
Not in so many words,
325
00:13:27,940 --> 00:13:30,241
or any words.
326
00:13:30,276 --> 00:13:32,911
Would it kill him
to actually say it?
327
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:37,549
No. No, it wouldn't kill him.
328
00:13:38,885 --> 00:13:40,852
Leonard,
329
00:13:40,887 --> 00:13:43,888
you know how
I got the money
330
00:13:43,923 --> 00:13:46,724
to open up my
first store?
331
00:13:46,759 --> 00:13:48,559
I busted my ass for it,
332
00:13:48,594 --> 00:13:51,662
'cause all the extra money
that we had had to go to Sheldon
333
00:13:51,697 --> 00:13:53,865
so he could go to
college and he could go
334
00:13:53,900 --> 00:13:55,867
study in Germany.
335
00:13:55,902 --> 00:13:58,636
And do you know
what he's never said to me?
336
00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:02,139
Danke schön?
337
00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:04,909
It's, uh, "thank you" in German.
338
00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:07,745
Do you need me
to sit on your head?
339
00:14:07,780 --> 00:14:10,147
Nope.
340
00:14:10,182 --> 00:14:12,216
After all my sacrifices,
341
00:14:12,251 --> 00:14:15,420
guess which kid
my mom is the most proud of.
342
00:14:17,323 --> 00:14:19,290
If it makes you feel any better,
343
00:14:19,325 --> 00:14:22,460
my mom's most proud
of Sheldon, too, so...
344
00:14:23,462 --> 00:14:24,595
Leonard,
345
00:14:24,630 --> 00:14:26,063
you want a beer?
346
00:14:26,098 --> 00:14:28,266
Yeah, I would love a beer.
347
00:14:28,301 --> 00:14:29,700
There you go.
348
00:14:29,735 --> 00:14:32,370
Thanks. Can you open it for me?
No, it's a twist-off.
349
00:14:32,405 --> 00:14:34,205
I know.
350
00:14:43,349 --> 00:14:45,116
Hey!
351
00:14:45,151 --> 00:14:48,319
I got all the beads
to the other side.
352
00:14:49,755 --> 00:14:51,589
It's not a puzzle, Penny.
353
00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:54,458
Do you really want
to be touching that?
354
00:14:54,493 --> 00:14:56,460
Do you know how
many sick kids...?
355
00:14:56,495 --> 00:14:59,430
You know, never mind.
Knock yourself out.
356
00:14:59,465 --> 00:15:00,498
(phone chimes)
357
00:15:00,533 --> 00:15:03,334
Bernadette says
they're checking the kids now.
358
00:15:03,369 --> 00:15:05,469
You know, maybe
we didn't all need to come.
359
00:15:05,504 --> 00:15:08,673
Hey, whatever kind of pink eye
their kids have, I have,
360
00:15:08,708 --> 00:15:10,141
and I need to know.
361
00:15:10,176 --> 00:15:12,543
And if it's viral, I'm screwed.
362
00:15:12,578 --> 00:15:15,947
Maybe not. You know, I know it's
not traditional wedding attire,
363
00:15:15,982 --> 00:15:18,582
but how about
a welder's mask?
364
00:15:18,617 --> 00:15:19,650
KOOTHRAPPALI:
If you know
365
00:15:19,685 --> 00:15:22,120
a welder, that could be
your "something borrowed."
366
00:15:23,656 --> 00:15:24,722
(door opens)
367
00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:26,691
Great news! It's bacterial!
368
00:15:26,726 --> 00:15:27,825
Yeah!
Yeah.
Yes!
369
00:15:27,860 --> 00:15:29,160
Yeah.
Yes.
(whooping)
370
00:15:29,195 --> 00:15:30,828
What are you doing?!
Wash your hands!
371
00:15:30,863 --> 00:15:32,964
Oh.
Not you.
372
00:15:35,901 --> 00:15:37,568
Hello. Room service?
373
00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:41,038
I'm calling about
the club sandwich on your menu.
374
00:15:41,073 --> 00:15:43,407
No, I-I don't want one.
375
00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:45,677
I just want you
to spell it correctly.
376
00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:50,381
Unless the "club"
is the Poor Typing Club.
377
00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:51,983
Okay.
378
00:15:52,018 --> 00:15:57,288
Now let's discuss
this 15% "gratooty"?
379
00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:01,359
Yeah-- well, that was rude.
380
00:16:01,394 --> 00:16:04,328
Someone just lost
their gratooty.
381
00:16:04,363 --> 00:16:05,396
(sighs)
382
00:16:05,431 --> 00:16:08,866
Sheldon, you need
to apologize to your brother.
383
00:16:08,901 --> 00:16:10,868
I'm sorry?
Yes.
384
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:13,170
Like that, but nicer,
and that way.
385
00:16:13,205 --> 00:16:16,107
I have nothing
to apologize for.
386
00:16:16,142 --> 00:16:18,109
(scoffs)
I told you this
was a bad idea.
387
00:16:18,144 --> 00:16:19,944
Sometimes you
can't patch a tire.
388
00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,912
You just got to
buy a new one.
389
00:16:21,947 --> 00:16:23,347
Actually, that's
always the case.
390
00:16:23,382 --> 00:16:26,117
Never patch, buy new.
391
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:29,353
While I appreciate
your folksy tire wisdom,
392
00:16:29,388 --> 00:16:31,956
I don't appreciate what
you're putting Mom through.
393
00:16:31,991 --> 00:16:33,891
What would you know
about what Mom's been through?
394
00:16:33,926 --> 00:16:35,026
You were never home.
395
00:16:35,061 --> 00:16:36,127
Yeah, this is good.
396
00:16:36,162 --> 00:16:38,062
Get it all out.
Not now!
Shut up!
397
00:16:38,097 --> 00:16:40,698
You went away to
college after Dad died.
398
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,433
Who do you think took
care of everything?
399
00:16:42,468 --> 00:16:46,303
Mom did. Mom always
took care of everything.
400
00:16:46,338 --> 00:16:48,973
Mom was a mess, Missy
was a dumb teenager.
401
00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:51,075
I had to look
after both of 'em.
402
00:16:51,110 --> 00:16:52,576
I talked to Mom
all the time.
403
00:16:52,611 --> 00:16:54,578
If she was upset,
she would have told me.
404
00:16:54,613 --> 00:16:57,281
She was protecting
you, you idiot,
405
00:16:57,316 --> 00:16:59,083
just like everyone
always does.
406
00:16:59,118 --> 00:17:01,085
If things were bad,
407
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:02,286
then why didn't you tell me?
408
00:17:02,321 --> 00:17:04,755
Because I was
protecting you, too.
409
00:17:04,790 --> 00:17:06,357
(sighs)
410
00:17:07,927 --> 00:17:09,560
You're my baby brother, Sheldon.
411
00:17:09,595 --> 00:17:12,463
I know life has been
hard for you,
412
00:17:12,498 --> 00:17:16,467
but that don't mean it's been
easy for the rest of us.
413
00:17:18,504 --> 00:17:22,373
I suppose I didn't think about
how it was for everyone else.
414
00:17:22,408 --> 00:17:24,575
No, that's all right.
415
00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:27,178
I know you didn't.
416
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:30,314
I'm sorry.
417
00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:33,317
Thank you.
418
00:17:33,352 --> 00:17:36,487
And it would
mean a lot to me
419
00:17:36,522 --> 00:17:39,123
to have my big brother
at my wedding.
420
00:17:42,828 --> 00:17:44,796
I wouldn't miss it.
421
00:17:50,936 --> 00:17:53,771
(voice breaking):
Is it me,
or did we just patch a tire?
422
00:17:56,775 --> 00:18:00,144
He said, "Never patch."
Do you even listen?
423
00:18:06,051 --> 00:18:08,853
(Skype ringing)
424
00:18:08,888 --> 00:18:13,290
Hey, how's it going?
425
00:18:13,325 --> 00:18:14,992
Really good.
426
00:18:15,027 --> 00:18:17,228
Georgie's going to come
to the wedding.
427
00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:18,662
Oh, that's great!
428
00:18:18,697 --> 00:18:20,931
Why aren't you looking
at the camera?
429
00:18:20,966 --> 00:18:25,870
Oh, you know, I'm just working
on my peripheral vision.
430
00:18:25,905 --> 00:18:27,505
Well, that is nonsense.
431
00:18:27,540 --> 00:18:29,907
Your peripheral vision is fine.
432
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:32,143
Are those women's magazines
making you feel bad
433
00:18:32,178 --> 00:18:34,145
about yourself again?
434
00:18:34,180 --> 00:18:38,716
Yup, that is what's happening.
435
00:18:38,751 --> 00:18:41,852
I have told you before,
those women are airbrushed
436
00:18:41,887 --> 00:18:45,422
to make it look like
they have good vision.
437
00:18:45,457 --> 00:18:47,758
Hey, I-I was thinking,
438
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:50,060
now that you and your brother
made up,
439
00:18:50,095 --> 00:18:51,929
there's no reason to rush home.
440
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:53,797
Maybe you and Leonard could,
441
00:18:53,832 --> 00:18:55,733
could stay for, uh...
442
00:18:55,768 --> 00:19:00,337
two to three more
fun-filled days there.
443
00:19:00,372 --> 00:19:03,307
That's a great idea!
444
00:19:03,342 --> 00:19:05,009
Hey, Leonard, good news.
445
00:19:05,044 --> 00:19:09,580
We do have time to visit the
Museum of the American Railroad!
446
00:19:09,615 --> 00:19:12,617
I'd say no,
but what's the point?
447
00:19:18,290 --> 00:19:20,791
Ooh. You might not want
to get too close.
448
00:19:20,826 --> 00:19:22,826
Pink eye.
449
00:19:22,861 --> 00:19:25,863
Me, too!
450
00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:28,699
Bacterial?
Yeah.
451
00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:31,001
Same!
(laughs)
452
00:19:31,036 --> 00:19:33,204
I-I know this is gonna
sound crazy, but...
453
00:19:33,239 --> 00:19:36,440
would you be interested in
going to a wedding with me?