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Previously on
The Big Bang Theory...
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We conclusively proved
super-asymmetry,
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00:00:04,259 --> 00:00:07,406
and yet somehow
we-we still feel like imposters.
4
00:00:07,407 --> 00:00:09,173
Yeah, there should be
a term for that.
5
00:00:09,242 --> 00:00:11,909
Oh, for crying out loud,
there is a term for that!
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It's called
"imposter syndrome,"
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00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:16,080
and you don't have it,
because you can't have it
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if you are imposters,
and you are!
9
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We're the ones who discovered
super-asymmetry,
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so if anyone's gonna feel like
they have imposter syndrome,
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it's us because we're
not imposters, they are!
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You're imposters
and you're frauds!
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I think what President Siebert
is trying to say is that
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this is a setback and we should
adopt a different strategy.
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I-I'm sorry.
I-I just-- I-I snapped.
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Oh, you're sorry.
It's all better, then.
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Listen up, you have shot
to win a Nobel Prize,
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and you're blowing it.
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I think what President Siebert
is trying to say
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is that you have a shot
to win a Nobel Prize,
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and you're blowing it.
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Uh, that's exactly
what he said.
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Yes, but I said it
in my calming HR voice.
24
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So, obviously,
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I'm really sorry
about my outburst.
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Calling you frauds
was unacceptable.
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I feel terrible
about it.
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It has caused her
a lot of stress.
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She chewed through
her night guard
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like it was a
piece of jerky.
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What you said was
really hurtful,
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especially because I
thought we were friends.
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Why would you think that?
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Ouch.
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Ignore them;
they're just mean people.
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Uh, not mean, just sorry.
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Seem mean, are sorry.
Happens all the time.
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It's okay.
I talked to my therapist,
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and she made me realize
that what you said
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was really more about
your own insecurities.
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I'm sorry, what?
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There you go, she's sorry.
We all heard it. Moving on.
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Yes, obviously,
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you're angry at all
the attention we're getting
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for our discovery
and you're lashing out.
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Well, uh, technically,
she lashed out.
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I contained myself,
which I don't think
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I'm getting
enough credit for.
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The point is we should
take it as a compliment
50
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that even you guys think
we will win the Nobel Prize.
51
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Uh, no, we-we certainly
do not think that.
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The Nobel Committee
will realize
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that we came up
with this theory.
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But we proved it.
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By accident.
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All breakthroughs
happen by accident.
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No, they don't!
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Look, the Nobel Committee
doesn't like infighting,
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so if the four of you don't stop
sniping at each other,
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the award's gonna go
to someone else entirely.
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He's right.
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You know, like it or not,
we can't avoid each other.
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Let's at least
try to be civil.
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Agreed.
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You know, when you
think about it,
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we're linked together the
same way that super-asymmetry
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links together every atom
in the universe.
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Hmm.
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That's not
what it does at all!
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Well, that's the great thing
about science.
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We all get to have
our own opinions.
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I'm still not talking.
That's impressive, right?
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♪ The Big Bang Theory 12x21 ♪
The Plagiarism Schism
Original Air Date o
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♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
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♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
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♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
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♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
78
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♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
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♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
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♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
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♪ Bang! ♪
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== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
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You-- No, no, no, no.
Your money's no good here.
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Well, I'm glad that
we hashed all that out,
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and moving forward,
may the best team win.
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I couldn't agree more.
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We're the best team.
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Greg Pemberton,
you old so-and-so.
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Very good to see you.
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Uh, let me introduce you
to my colleague, Dr. Campbell.
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Uh, Kevin, this is Barry Kripke.
We went to college together.
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Great to meet you.
Well, you have my number.
93
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We should hit up the
buffet at the strip club
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while you're in town.
95
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Nothing beats a lap dance
and a baked potato bar, huh?
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You can come, too.
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That's a hard pass.
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I'll walk you out.
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Good to see you, Barry.
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You're the best!
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Oh...
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God, I hate that guy.
103
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That's strange; you
seem quite fond of him.
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I was only being polite.
Pemberton is a grade A weasel.
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How do I know you're
not just being polite
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when you say it's
nice to see me?
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I have literally
never said that to you.
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Why do you say he's a weasel?
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Pemberton's whole M.O.
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was to take other people's ideas
and turn them in as his own.
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That's exactly what
he's doing to us.
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I'm not surprised. I heard the
only work he did on his thesis
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was googling,
"Where can I buy a thesis?"
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Well, plagiarism is a pretty
serious charge. Are you sure?
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You want proof?
I can make some calls.
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You'd do that for us?
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I really don't want to see
that guy win a Nobel.
118
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I also don't want
to see you win a Nobel.
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Ooh, this is tricky.
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I don't know, Barry.
It sounds a little sleazy.
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Well, let me know
if you change your mind.
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Sleazy is where I thrive.
123
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So I was talking
to my mom
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about our Pemberton
and Campbell situation.
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Really? What'd she say?
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Apparently, Old Testament God
would bring down his wrath
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on them for being deceitful,
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but New Testament God
would forgive them.
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So couldn't we just
bring down our wrath
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and ask the New Testament God
to forgive us?
131
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You know, I asked her
that very question.
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And?
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She said I was full
of California sass.
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Oh, good, you're all here.
Uh, we're wrestling
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with an ethical question,
and perhaps you could help.
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- Sure, what's up? - Yeah.
- Fire away.
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If we have damaging
and embarrassing information
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about someone, should we keep it
to ourselves or expose them?
139
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Quick question: Does it happen
to do with online tastes
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that might or might not reflect
their real-life tastes?
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I know all about your
tall girl website.
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It goes on our
credit card.
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It's Dr. Pemberton.
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Kripke says
he plagiarized his thesis,
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and that he can prove it.
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Wow. Well, that's not gonna sit
well with the Nobel Committee.
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Hang on. I don't think
it's fair to use something
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someone did in school
against them.
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Relax, he said
it's not you.
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I don't know.
If someone's a cheater,
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they should be held accountable
no matter how long ago it was.
152
00:06:38,321 --> 00:06:42,156
Okay, now
you just sound crazy.
153
00:06:42,225 --> 00:06:44,258
So you really think
they should do this?
154
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It wouldn't
just knock Pemberton
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out of Nobel contention, it
would blow up his whole career.
156
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To that, I say kaboom!
157
00:06:53,570 --> 00:06:56,170
No, I meant
it's a bad thing.
158
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No, no, I agree
with Bernadette.
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00:06:57,674 --> 00:06:58,906
If Pemberton cheated,
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00:06:58,975 --> 00:07:01,015
maybe he shouldn't have a career
in the first place.
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00:07:01,044 --> 00:07:02,922
There's plenty of people
that didn't plagiarize.
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00:07:02,946 --> 00:07:05,146
And a few of us who did,
but it's only 'cause
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The Scarlet Letter
was so boring.
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00:07:09,085 --> 00:07:11,252
Aw, I love
The Scarlet Letter.
165
00:07:11,321 --> 00:07:14,021
Th-That's where I got
my taste for bad girls.
166
00:07:15,758 --> 00:07:20,328
Ugh, why is this
decision so hard?
167
00:07:20,396 --> 00:07:21,996
Maybe because
you want to win,
168
00:07:22,065 --> 00:07:24,732
but deep down you know it's not
the honorable way to do it.
169
00:07:24,801 --> 00:07:26,312
Otherwise, you would've
done it already.
170
00:07:26,336 --> 00:07:27,969
That's really wise.
171
00:07:28,037 --> 00:07:31,872
Yes, but it may just be
the Indian accent.
172
00:07:35,778 --> 00:07:38,212
Do you think
by not exposing Pemberton
173
00:07:38,248 --> 00:07:40,548
we're doing
the right thing?
174
00:07:40,617 --> 00:07:42,183
Of course.
175
00:07:42,252 --> 00:07:45,453
Unless you think we're not
doing the right thing.
176
00:07:45,521 --> 00:07:47,288
Why would you think
that I don't think
177
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we're doing the right thing?
178
00:07:48,691 --> 00:07:52,293
You might think that if
good people hold themselves
179
00:07:52,362 --> 00:07:54,295
to unrealistically high
ethical standards,
180
00:07:54,364 --> 00:07:57,365
then they might lose out to
their unscrupulous competitors.
181
00:07:57,433 --> 00:07:58,532
Is that what you think?
182
00:07:58,601 --> 00:07:59,800
No.
183
00:07:59,869 --> 00:08:01,636
No, I just thought
if you thought we weren't
184
00:08:01,704 --> 00:08:04,572
doing the right thing,
that's why you might think that.
185
00:08:04,641 --> 00:08:06,841
Well, if I did think that,
186
00:08:06,909 --> 00:08:09,176
you might point out
that people who claim
187
00:08:09,245 --> 00:08:11,612
it's okay to do
bad things to win
188
00:08:11,681 --> 00:08:14,248
are bad people no matter
what they tell themselves.
189
00:08:14,317 --> 00:08:15,983
And I'd be right
190
00:08:16,052 --> 00:08:17,251
to point that out.
191
00:08:17,320 --> 00:08:18,986
Because you're a good person.
192
00:08:20,823 --> 00:08:23,391
I love talking
to you.
193
00:08:23,459 --> 00:08:25,926
It's like talking to me,
but with a girl voice.
194
00:08:29,365 --> 00:08:32,266
I'm just saying, Sheldon
and Amy deserve to win,
195
00:08:32,335 --> 00:08:34,502
and sometimes that means
doing what you got to do.
196
00:08:34,570 --> 00:08:37,204
Don't you think it's better
to take the high road?
197
00:08:37,273 --> 00:08:38,572
Yeah, and instead of guns,
198
00:08:38,641 --> 00:08:42,810
armies should carry
candy canes that shoot wishes.
199
00:08:42,879 --> 00:08:44,490
So what's the worst thing
you've ever done
200
00:08:44,514 --> 00:08:46,063
to get something
you wanted?
201
00:08:46,132 --> 00:08:47,665
I'm not gonna
tell you that.
202
00:08:47,734 --> 00:08:50,051
Oh, come on.
I'll tell you mine.
203
00:08:50,119 --> 00:08:52,820
Right,
'cause yours is gonna be
204
00:08:52,889 --> 00:08:55,423
as bad as mine. Okay.
205
00:08:55,491 --> 00:08:57,925
Come on, just tell me.
206
00:08:57,994 --> 00:08:59,860
Okay, fine.
207
00:08:59,929 --> 00:09:02,296
When we first met,
there was another waitress
208
00:09:02,365 --> 00:09:04,376
at The Cheesecake Factory
who thought you were cute,
209
00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:09,170
so I told her you had all
the hepatitises, A through Z.
210
00:09:09,238 --> 00:09:11,806
There aren't
26 hepatitises.
211
00:09:11,874 --> 00:09:13,674
Well, if she was smart
enough to know that,
212
00:09:13,743 --> 00:09:16,077
she wouldn't still be working
at a Cheesecake Factory.
213
00:09:16,145 --> 00:09:17,878
Oh, she still works there?
Who was it?
214
00:09:17,947 --> 00:09:19,413
Why does it matter?
215
00:09:19,482 --> 00:09:23,417
You're right, it doesn't matter
'cause I got the best one.
216
00:09:25,288 --> 00:09:26,954
Was it Susan?
217
00:09:27,023 --> 00:09:28,389
Why? Because she's tall?
218
00:09:28,458 --> 00:09:30,591
Good night.
219
00:09:31,994 --> 00:09:34,128
Can't believe it.
220
00:09:34,197 --> 00:09:36,630
Sheldon loves telling on people
when they break the rules.
221
00:09:36,699 --> 00:09:38,733
Yeah, well, maybe he's changed.
222
00:09:38,801 --> 00:09:40,846
He hasn't changed. Last week,
when the vending machine
223
00:09:40,870 --> 00:09:43,971
gave me two bags of chips,
he called my mom.
224
00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:45,873
Well, that didn't
ruin your life.
225
00:09:45,942 --> 00:09:47,141
Well, it ruined my day.
226
00:09:47,210 --> 00:09:49,944
I had to talk to my mom,
who, by the way,
227
00:09:50,012 --> 00:09:54,482
is-is polyamorous now,
so that's fun to think about.
228
00:09:54,550 --> 00:09:56,617
Look, I'm proud
of Sheldon and Amy.
229
00:09:56,686 --> 00:09:58,931
You know? They want to win
this thing on their own merits,
230
00:09:58,955 --> 00:10:00,988
not by knocking out
the competition.
231
00:10:01,057 --> 00:10:02,456
Yeah, but what if
they don't win?
232
00:10:02,525 --> 00:10:04,625
Uh, Pemberton and Campbell
have done an amazing job
233
00:10:04,694 --> 00:10:06,794
of associating their names
with super-asymmetry.
234
00:10:06,863 --> 00:10:08,896
They have all
the momentum right now.
235
00:10:08,965 --> 00:10:10,609
I don't like the idea
of them losing either,
236
00:10:10,633 --> 00:10:13,167
but this is their decision
to make, not ours.
237
00:10:14,670 --> 00:10:16,203
Maybe it is ours.
238
00:10:16,272 --> 00:10:17,705
What do you mean?
239
00:10:17,774 --> 00:10:20,875
Well, i-if Sheldon and Amy
don't want to expose Pemberton,
240
00:10:20,943 --> 00:10:23,411
that doesn't mean someone else
can't do it for them.
241
00:10:23,479 --> 00:10:25,146
They'd never have to know.
242
00:10:25,214 --> 00:10:27,014
Really? You'd do that?
243
00:10:27,083 --> 00:10:28,349
They deserve the Nobel.
244
00:10:28,418 --> 00:10:30,851
I'm not gonna let two frauds
steal it from them.
245
00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:33,554
And if that means getting
my hands dirty, so be it.
246
00:10:33,623 --> 00:10:36,957
What's so funny?
247
00:10:37,026 --> 00:10:41,529
Just realized I've never
actually seen your hands dirty.
248
00:10:43,049 --> 00:10:45,983
All right, Hofstadter, here's
all the proof you need.
249
00:10:46,052 --> 00:10:47,818
- Great, thanks.
- Just remember,
250
00:10:47,887 --> 00:10:51,605
once you take this envelope,
there's no turning back.
251
00:10:51,674 --> 00:10:54,275
What if I look at it
and decide not to use it?
252
00:10:57,847 --> 00:10:59,780
I had not considered that.
253
00:11:00,883 --> 00:11:02,082
Got to hand it to you,
254
00:11:02,151 --> 00:11:03,962
you got a real talent
for making things boring.
255
00:11:03,986 --> 00:11:05,986
Thanks.
256
00:11:06,055 --> 00:11:08,189
Hey, look at that,
you did it again.
257
00:11:10,326 --> 00:11:11,459
Hi, Leonard.
258
00:11:11,527 --> 00:11:13,294
What? Nothing.
259
00:11:13,362 --> 00:11:15,196
You okay?
260
00:11:15,264 --> 00:11:16,564
Uh, no, you are.
261
00:11:22,994 --> 00:11:25,462
So guess what.
There was a waitress
262
00:11:25,463 --> 00:11:27,396
at The Cheesecake Factory
back in the day
263
00:11:27,465 --> 00:11:29,498
who kind of had a thing for me.
264
00:11:29,567 --> 00:11:33,135
Other than Bernadette?
That does not sound right.
265
00:11:33,204 --> 00:11:34,570
Honest to God.
266
00:11:34,639 --> 00:11:35,971
Oh, well, who was it?
267
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:37,518
It doesn't even matter.
I'm happily married.
268
00:11:37,542 --> 00:11:40,976
The point is women-- plural--
find me appealing.
269
00:11:41,045 --> 00:11:43,479
Okay. Okay, well,
well, let's see.
270
00:11:43,548 --> 00:11:45,648
Okay? We-we know
it wasn't Penny,
271
00:11:45,717 --> 00:11:47,983
we know it wasn't Susan...
- Wait.
272
00:11:48,052 --> 00:11:49,385
How do we know it wasn't Susan?
273
00:11:49,454 --> 00:11:51,153
Uh, because she had a type.
274
00:11:51,222 --> 00:11:52,421
What type?
275
00:11:52,490 --> 00:11:55,257
Don't make me say it.
276
00:11:55,326 --> 00:11:58,260
Are you saying
I'm not a handsome guy?
277
00:11:58,329 --> 00:12:01,030
See? It's mean, right?
278
00:12:03,401 --> 00:12:05,334
Hold on, as we've established,
279
00:12:05,403 --> 00:12:08,037
a minimum of two women
think I'm attractive.
280
00:12:08,106 --> 00:12:11,207
Uh, yeah, you're right,
it was totally Susan.
281
00:12:11,275 --> 00:12:14,076
I didn't say it was her.
I said it could've been.
282
00:12:14,145 --> 00:12:17,279
It could've been anybody.
Marta, Gina, Annalise...
283
00:12:17,348 --> 00:12:20,850
It's a little creepy that
you remember all their names.
284
00:12:20,918 --> 00:12:22,351
Not just their names.
285
00:12:22,420 --> 00:12:24,453
The cars they drove,
the color of their eyes,
286
00:12:24,522 --> 00:12:26,555
and whether or not
they had boyfriends.
287
00:12:29,293 --> 00:12:31,560
Your husband was acting
kind of weird today.
288
00:12:31,629 --> 00:12:34,930
You sure you're not thinking
about your husband?
289
00:12:34,966 --> 00:12:37,533
No. He was acting all sketchy.
290
00:12:37,602 --> 00:12:39,401
Almost like he was guilty
or something.
291
00:12:39,437 --> 00:12:40,877
Oh. Well,
that doesn't mean anything.
292
00:12:40,938 --> 00:12:43,873
I mean, Leonard has
resting guilt face.
293
00:12:43,941 --> 00:12:45,919
Yeah, it's-it's like, "What are
you guilty about, Leonard?"
294
00:12:45,943 --> 00:12:48,444
"Nothing." "Well, then,
tell it to your face."
295
00:12:48,513 --> 00:12:50,579
Are you okay?
296
00:12:50,648 --> 00:12:52,381
I'm so okay, yeah.
297
00:12:52,450 --> 00:12:54,617
Then why are you
acting guilty now?
298
00:12:55,720 --> 00:12:57,520
Okay, look, Leonard knows
299
00:12:57,588 --> 00:12:59,989
that you and Sheldon
decided to take the high road,
300
00:13:00,057 --> 00:13:01,457
so he went to
Kripke for you.
301
00:13:01,526 --> 00:13:03,459
But that just means you
didn't do anything wrong,
302
00:13:03,528 --> 00:13:05,328
and now you don't risk
losing to those idiots.
303
00:13:05,396 --> 00:13:07,229
Why did you tell me?
304
00:13:07,298 --> 00:13:09,598
Now that I know, I'm implicated.
305
00:13:09,667 --> 00:13:10,833
But you wanted me to.
306
00:13:10,902 --> 00:13:13,002
I also wanted you
to be my jester
307
00:13:13,070 --> 00:13:15,471
at the Renaissance Fair,
but that didn't happen.
308
00:13:15,540 --> 00:13:18,007
I wanted to be a princess.
309
00:13:18,075 --> 00:13:21,410
There was only one princess,
and it was me!
310
00:13:21,479 --> 00:13:24,580
Fine. I'm sorry I told you.
311
00:13:24,649 --> 00:13:26,549
And I forgive you.
312
00:13:26,617 --> 00:13:29,385
'Cause that's what
a princess would do.
313
00:13:30,822 --> 00:13:32,922
Kudos on the meatballs.
314
00:13:32,990 --> 00:13:34,924
They're nice and round.
315
00:13:36,727 --> 00:13:38,194
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
316
00:13:38,262 --> 00:13:40,196
They're much better
than those prolate spheroids
317
00:13:40,264 --> 00:13:42,698
you used to pass off as balls.
318
00:13:42,767 --> 00:13:44,433
Okay.
319
00:13:44,502 --> 00:13:47,303
Are you all right?
You seem distracted.
320
00:13:47,371 --> 00:13:50,940
Yeah, sorry. I'm just trying
to figure something out.
321
00:13:51,008 --> 00:13:52,808
Is it what to get me
for our anniversary?
322
00:13:52,877 --> 00:13:54,477
'Cause I'll give you
a hint: it's already
323
00:13:54,545 --> 00:13:57,980
in my Amazon basket.
Just click "buy now."
324
00:13:59,183 --> 00:14:00,549
I filled out
the gift card for you.
325
00:14:00,618 --> 00:14:03,786
Apparently,
I'm the light of your life.
326
00:14:03,855 --> 00:14:07,623
Sheldon, if someone
were gonna do something
327
00:14:07,692 --> 00:14:09,859
ethically murky on your behalf,
328
00:14:09,927 --> 00:14:11,694
would you rather
know about it
329
00:14:11,762 --> 00:14:14,997
or not know about it
to retain your innocence?
330
00:14:15,066 --> 00:14:19,134
Well, now that I know there's
a thing to know, I have to know.
331
00:14:19,203 --> 00:14:21,804
Can't help myself;
I'm a fact addict.
332
00:14:21,873 --> 00:14:23,539
That's not a real thing.
333
00:14:23,608 --> 00:14:25,774
And that's a fact.
334
00:14:27,144 --> 00:14:30,312
Leonard, I know
what you're planning to do,
335
00:14:30,381 --> 00:14:31,625
and I said
I didn't want to do it.
336
00:14:31,649 --> 00:14:32,815
What? You told him?
337
00:14:32,884 --> 00:14:34,250
Well, you told me.
338
00:14:34,318 --> 00:14:36,819
Yeah, that's-that's
probably where you heard it.
339
00:14:37,989 --> 00:14:39,588
You're not
doing anything wrong.
340
00:14:39,657 --> 00:14:41,357
That's the point.
I'm doing it.
341
00:14:41,425 --> 00:14:43,158
Yeah, but it's still wrong.
342
00:14:43,227 --> 00:14:44,894
Well, so is
you and Amy not getting
343
00:14:44,962 --> 00:14:46,328
the recognition
for your discovery.
344
00:14:46,397 --> 00:14:48,497
And if that means
I have to do something shady
345
00:14:48,566 --> 00:14:50,766
so you don't have to,
I'm okay with that.
346
00:14:50,835 --> 00:14:52,301
But we're not.
347
00:14:52,370 --> 00:14:55,204
I mean, it's sweet that you want
to help, but we don't want you
348
00:14:55,273 --> 00:14:57,373
compromising your integrity
for us.
349
00:14:57,441 --> 00:14:59,875
Wait, what-- really?
350
00:14:59,944 --> 00:15:02,211
I thought we were just
worried about looking bad.
351
00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:04,346
It could be both.
352
00:15:04,415 --> 00:15:06,015
Okay.
353
00:15:06,083 --> 00:15:09,151
But I'm gonna go with my reason.
Yours is too complicated.
354
00:15:12,757 --> 00:15:14,223
Hey.
355
00:15:14,292 --> 00:15:15,524
Hey.
356
00:15:15,593 --> 00:15:19,128
Listen, I did something
kind of stupid today.
357
00:15:19,196 --> 00:15:21,397
Okay.
358
00:15:21,465 --> 00:15:23,065
I went to The Cheesecake Factory
359
00:15:23,134 --> 00:15:26,435
to try to figure out
who that waitress was.
360
00:15:26,504 --> 00:15:28,437
- Howie.
- Don't worry, I didn't find out,
361
00:15:28,506 --> 00:15:31,373
because I realized
I didn't even care.
362
00:15:31,442 --> 00:15:33,976
W-While I was there,
I started asking myself,
363
00:15:34,045 --> 00:15:35,878
"Why does this mean
anything to me?"
364
00:15:35,947 --> 00:15:41,617
And... I guess the truth is
it was all about my vanity.
365
00:15:41,686 --> 00:15:45,554
And why should I need to be
validated by another woman
366
00:15:45,623 --> 00:15:50,693
liking me when the best woman
in the world already loves me?
367
00:15:52,129 --> 00:15:54,630
And I just wanted
you to know that.
368
00:15:56,367 --> 00:15:57,847
The restaurant manager
already called.
369
00:15:57,902 --> 00:15:59,702
You really creeped
a lot of people out.
370
00:16:01,405 --> 00:16:04,940
And I regret that.
371
00:16:05,009 --> 00:16:07,710
Because the only woman
I want to creep out
372
00:16:07,778 --> 00:16:09,545
is the mother
of my children.
373
00:16:11,949 --> 00:16:14,583
Well, you're off
to a good start.
374
00:16:18,689 --> 00:16:20,522
Thank you for meeting us.
375
00:16:20,591 --> 00:16:21,690
No problem.
376
00:16:21,759 --> 00:16:23,704
We never say no when someone
wants to buy us lunch.
377
00:16:23,728 --> 00:16:26,195
We didn't say we were
going to buy you lunch.
378
00:16:26,263 --> 00:16:28,197
Really? Apologies go down easier
379
00:16:28,265 --> 00:16:30,499
with free
turkey club sandwiches.
380
00:16:31,602 --> 00:16:34,470
This isn't another apology.
381
00:16:34,538 --> 00:16:35,983
There's something
we have to give you.
382
00:16:36,007 --> 00:16:37,606
Yes.
383
00:16:37,675 --> 00:16:41,977
Uh, we have proof that you
plagiarized your thesis.
384
00:16:42,046 --> 00:16:44,480
It's why we invited you
to this lunch.
385
00:16:44,548 --> 00:16:45,981
We invited them.
386
00:16:46,050 --> 00:16:49,551
That's the confusion
over who's paying.
387
00:16:49,620 --> 00:16:51,520
Hold on, are you
blackmailing us?
388
00:16:51,589 --> 00:16:53,255
No, the opposite.
389
00:16:54,358 --> 00:16:56,358
We're blackmailing you?
390
00:16:59,530 --> 00:17:01,797
How are you
up for a Nobel?!
391
00:17:01,866 --> 00:17:03,665
We're giving you this
392
00:17:03,734 --> 00:17:05,834
so that no one can
use it against you,
393
00:17:05,903 --> 00:17:08,337
because we want to win
on our own merits,
394
00:17:08,406 --> 00:17:10,139
not by tearing you down.
395
00:17:10,207 --> 00:17:12,474
So it's true?
You really did this?
396
00:17:12,543 --> 00:17:13,854
It was years ago, and
I was going through
397
00:17:13,878 --> 00:17:15,811
a very hard time.
- What hard time?
398
00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:18,847
I had to write a thesis, and
I wasn't smart enough to do it.
399
00:17:20,985 --> 00:17:23,285
You realize my name
is attached to yours.
400
00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:25,254
If this gets out,
it ruins me, too.
401
00:17:25,322 --> 00:17:27,022
It's not gonna get out.
402
00:17:27,091 --> 00:17:28,435
You know what?
Linda was right.
403
00:17:28,459 --> 00:17:29,992
You're always
looking for shortcuts.
404
00:17:30,061 --> 00:17:33,028
When did you talk
to my ex-wife?
405
00:17:33,097 --> 00:17:34,097
She's not your ex-wife.
406
00:17:34,165 --> 00:17:35,442
You keep dragging your feet
on those papers.
407
00:17:35,466 --> 00:17:38,434
Well, I'm trying to
get the lake house.
408
00:17:38,502 --> 00:17:39,713
You're not getting
the lake house.
409
00:17:39,737 --> 00:17:41,670
You're never
getting the lake house.
410
00:17:41,739 --> 00:17:43,139
She picked it out,
she decorated it.
411
00:17:43,207 --> 00:17:44,740
The lake house is hers.
412
00:17:44,809 --> 00:17:46,508
What is going on here?
413
00:17:46,577 --> 00:17:48,877
I'm in love with Linda!
414
00:17:51,015 --> 00:17:53,549
You son of a bitch!
415
00:18:02,593 --> 00:18:05,027
That was my iced tea.
416
00:18:09,929 --> 00:18:11,729
Dr. Cooper, Dr. Fowler.
417
00:18:11,798 --> 00:18:13,798
Just the guy I want to see.
418
00:18:15,032 --> 00:18:16,389
Are you drunk?
419
00:18:16,390 --> 00:18:19,291
I was, and then I still was.
420
00:18:19,360 --> 00:18:22,094
And now, I still was.
421
00:18:22,162 --> 00:18:24,830
Okay, can we help you?
422
00:18:24,898 --> 00:18:26,798
Pemberton is out.
423
00:18:26,867 --> 00:18:28,333
Someone published
all the information
424
00:18:28,402 --> 00:18:29,835
about his plagiarism.
425
00:18:29,903 --> 00:18:31,303
It was me.
426
00:18:32,911 --> 00:18:36,200
Someone else told Fermilab,
and he lost his job.
427
00:18:36,201 --> 00:18:37,634
Also me.
428
00:18:38,346 --> 00:18:39,243
And someone is
429
00:18:39,244 --> 00:18:43,212
sleeping with his ex-wife
and it's not me.
430
00:18:43,281 --> 00:18:45,481
I thought it was.
431
00:18:45,550 --> 00:18:48,017
Not anymore. Apparently,
just because I'm better
432
00:18:48,086 --> 00:18:51,153
than her husband doesn't mean
I'm as good as her contractor.
433
00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:55,024
Women, huh?
434
00:18:55,093 --> 00:18:56,492
I-I think you
need to go.
435
00:18:56,561 --> 00:18:58,561
No, wait.
Hear me out.
436
00:18:58,630 --> 00:19:00,229
Look, the three of us
could team up.
437
00:19:00,298 --> 00:19:01,364
There's one
small catch.
438
00:19:01,432 --> 00:19:03,132
Dr. Pemberton
has been saying
439
00:19:03,201 --> 00:19:04,934
a lot of bad stuff about me.
440
00:19:05,003 --> 00:19:07,470
But don't worry, I couldn't
possibly have done any of it,
441
00:19:07,505 --> 00:19:09,538
because I was with you guys
the whole time.
442
00:19:09,607 --> 00:19:10,873
I did it.
443
00:19:14,579 --> 00:19:16,278
Frankly,
I don't know what Linda
444
00:19:16,347 --> 00:19:17,813
ever saw in either of them.
445
00:19:18,768 --> 00:19:25,768
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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