1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:00,820 (siren wailing) 2 00:00:00,917 --> 00:00:04,157 (mellow melodic music) 3 00:00:18,840 --> 00:00:20,420 - One move and it's your brains 4 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:22,620 all over the SteriWipes, Loz. 5 00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:24,720 - I don't want no trouble, ma'am. 6 00:00:25,401 --> 00:00:28,921 I just want a suction tube, some cloth tape and... 7 00:00:30,842 --> 00:00:32,502 Some saline solution. 8 00:00:32,602 --> 00:00:34,502 (Jo imitating gunshot) Ah! 9 00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:36,542 (Jo imitating gunshot) 10 00:00:36,643 --> 00:00:38,823 Why? 11 00:00:38,923 --> 00:00:41,823 (Jo imitating gunshot) 12 00:00:41,923 --> 00:00:42,903 You just shot yourself. - Yeah, 13 00:00:43,004 --> 00:00:44,984 I'm not doing time for you, Loz. 14 00:00:45,084 --> 00:00:46,824 - Ow! (groaning softly) 15 00:00:46,924 --> 00:00:47,944 - Oh, Loz, are you alright? 16 00:00:48,044 --> 00:00:51,154 - Yeah, just a little posterior thigh strain. 17 00:00:51,245 --> 00:00:51,985 - Oh. 18 00:00:52,085 --> 00:00:54,465 - June's into pony play, she spent the evening 19 00:00:54,566 --> 00:00:57,146 mounting me as a palomino horse called Mr. Major. 20 00:00:57,246 --> 00:00:59,346 My fault, 'cause I didn't properly brace for impact. 21 00:00:59,446 --> 00:01:01,346 - Jesus, that's messed up. - Not as messed up 22 00:01:01,447 --> 00:01:05,587 as you're gonna be, Little Missy Lady. 23 00:01:05,687 --> 00:01:07,787 - It's not even loaded. 24 00:01:07,888 --> 00:01:09,748 - Oh, really? (tongue clicking) 25 00:01:09,848 --> 00:01:11,988 Never turn your back on the Lozenge of Doom. 26 00:01:12,088 --> 00:01:13,388 (door clicking) 27 00:01:13,489 --> 00:01:14,989 - Well, hello, Lawrence. 28 00:01:15,089 --> 00:01:17,229 - Oh, hi, George. 29 00:01:17,329 --> 00:01:19,329 See you, Jo. 30 00:01:22,090 --> 00:01:24,290 - So REACT training? 31 00:01:25,251 --> 00:01:27,751 - Reactions like this, I don't need training, George. 32 00:01:27,851 --> 00:01:28,911 - Or I could just tell your boss 33 00:01:29,011 --> 00:01:30,831 that you're refusing a mandated mental health scheme. 34 00:01:30,932 --> 00:01:32,792 - Fortunately, George, I've got some real training to do 35 00:01:32,892 --> 00:01:35,792 with the new re-stocker, so I don't have time. 36 00:01:35,892 --> 00:01:37,952 (door thudding) (door locking) 37 00:01:38,053 --> 00:01:43,053 ♪ Oh, ooh ♪ 38 00:01:43,654 --> 00:01:47,154 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 39 00:01:47,254 --> 00:01:48,484 ♪ Yeah ♪ 40 00:01:48,575 --> 00:01:51,915 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 41 00:01:52,015 --> 00:01:53,555 ♪ Yeah ♪ 42 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:56,995 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 43 00:01:57,096 --> 00:01:58,396 ♪ Yeah ♪ 44 00:01:58,496 --> 00:01:59,996 - Oh, allow it, Jo, man. 45 00:02:00,096 --> 00:02:01,476 - You're not taking an ambulance 46 00:02:01,577 --> 00:02:03,517 to a knife crime workshop, they're too valuable. 47 00:02:03,617 --> 00:02:05,197 - And we are not? - Exactly. 48 00:02:05,297 --> 00:02:08,397 Now don't take all day, but try to inspire these young minds 49 00:02:08,498 --> 00:02:09,638 to stop knifing each other 50 00:02:09,738 --> 00:02:11,638 and get me some new paramedic recruits. 51 00:02:11,738 --> 00:02:14,518 - Wendy, this is the whitest car ever made, blood, 52 00:02:14,619 --> 00:02:16,599 I can't go to no hood school in this. 53 00:02:16,699 --> 00:02:18,159 You are proper violating me, man 54 00:02:18,259 --> 00:02:20,519 and I'm too hungover for this. - Oh good night? 55 00:02:20,620 --> 00:02:22,880 - Worst, yesterday would've been my dad's birthday. 56 00:02:22,980 --> 00:02:26,000 - Oh, you never said, you haven't spoken about him in ages. 57 00:02:26,101 --> 00:02:28,161 - It's not that deep, bruv. 58 00:02:28,261 --> 00:02:30,721 I did this little thing for him at the pub for his mates, 59 00:02:30,821 --> 00:02:32,121 but they just kept rinsing me out, 60 00:02:32,222 --> 00:02:33,842 because I still live at home with my mother. 61 00:02:33,942 --> 00:02:36,562 They're like, "Puff Puff, you are a blight 62 00:02:36,662 --> 00:02:38,682 on the hallowed memory of your father." 63 00:02:38,783 --> 00:02:40,603 - Puff Puff, why do they call you that? 64 00:02:40,703 --> 00:02:42,243 - I didn't say Puff Puff. (Wendy laughing) 65 00:02:42,343 --> 00:02:43,683 I said Puff Puff. - Ooh! 66 00:02:43,784 --> 00:02:45,884 - They're calling me a fried dumpling, blood. 67 00:02:45,984 --> 00:02:48,644 They think 'cause I don't have enough money, I ain't shit. 68 00:02:48,744 --> 00:02:50,534 - Well, I hope you told them where to flipping go. 69 00:02:50,625 --> 00:02:54,405 - Are you mad? I'm Nigerian and they're my elders. 70 00:02:54,505 --> 00:02:57,085 I paid the bill, bowed my head and asked for their blessing. 71 00:02:57,186 --> 00:02:59,646 But it's cool, 'cause today I'm gonna smash it 72 00:02:59,746 --> 00:03:01,646 and I might even ask Jo for a promotion. 73 00:03:01,747 --> 00:03:03,767 - [Wendy] Right, well, get in the car, Puff Puff. 74 00:03:03,867 --> 00:03:05,807 - Look, I beg you take the back roads, man, 75 00:03:05,907 --> 00:03:06,667 (car door thudding) this car is crap. 76 00:03:06,747 --> 00:03:09,487 - Oh, come on, get in, it's gonna be great. 77 00:03:09,588 --> 00:03:12,328 (melodic upbeat music) 78 00:03:12,428 --> 00:03:14,628 ♪ What up ♪ 79 00:03:15,949 --> 00:03:18,009 - Tasha's had her bone marrow transplant, 80 00:03:18,109 --> 00:03:20,809 apparently her pick line's a bit dodge. 81 00:03:20,910 --> 00:03:23,270 - Okay, so we go in, 82 00:03:24,310 --> 00:03:26,690 no eye contact, no sudden movements 83 00:03:26,791 --> 00:03:28,211 and I know this is gonna be hard for you, 84 00:03:28,311 --> 00:03:30,611 but please give her no reason to attack. 85 00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:33,171 (ambulance doors clicking) 86 00:03:33,272 --> 00:03:34,892 - Thank God you're here. 87 00:03:34,992 --> 00:03:36,492 (ambulance doors thudding) 88 00:03:36,592 --> 00:03:38,212 - I thought you'd be cross, 89 00:03:38,313 --> 00:03:41,933 seeing as we flambed Tasha's comics on our last visit. 90 00:03:42,033 --> 00:03:44,013 - I don't care who they send, 91 00:03:44,114 --> 00:03:46,934 it's just nice to have someone, anyone else here. 92 00:03:47,034 --> 00:03:51,024 We've been stuck in isolation together since the transplant. 93 00:03:51,115 --> 00:03:53,975 (Claire sobbing) 94 00:03:54,075 --> 00:03:55,215 She hates me. 95 00:03:55,315 --> 00:03:59,255 - It happens, she's just lashing out at the caregiver. 96 00:03:59,356 --> 00:04:01,496 She doesn't hate you. - Oi! 97 00:04:01,597 --> 00:04:03,737 They're here for me, why are you leaving them out there? 98 00:04:03,837 --> 00:04:05,937 I could be literally dying up here. 99 00:04:06,037 --> 00:04:07,817 What's wrong with you? 100 00:04:07,918 --> 00:04:08,858 (window thudding) 101 00:04:08,958 --> 00:04:10,958 - Well, she definitely hates you. 102 00:04:12,678 --> 00:04:15,018 (melodic orchestral music) 103 00:04:15,119 --> 00:04:18,839 - Oh, it looks gorgeous, wowser, so posh. 104 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:24,100 Wake up, Puff Puff, we're here. 105 00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:25,820 - Hm. 106 00:04:25,921 --> 00:04:27,981 - Oh, I can't wait to do my rap. 107 00:04:28,081 --> 00:04:30,461 - Oh God, no please, please. 108 00:04:30,561 --> 00:04:31,781 These young brothers are going through 109 00:04:31,882 --> 00:04:34,462 a knife crime epidemic, they've suffered enough. 110 00:04:34,562 --> 00:04:36,562 - There's no brothers here. 111 00:04:39,203 --> 00:04:42,623 - What, away, are you sure this is the right place? 112 00:04:42,723 --> 00:04:44,503 - It's lovely, isn't it? 113 00:04:44,604 --> 00:04:47,144 Oh, can you imagine me in a place like this 114 00:04:47,244 --> 00:04:49,344 fumbling about in Hugh Bonneville's breeches? 115 00:04:49,444 --> 00:04:50,874 - Ugh! - I haven't had a good fumble 116 00:04:50,965 --> 00:04:53,945 since Spencer got here, not even with myself. 117 00:04:54,045 --> 00:04:54,985 - Hey, please. 118 00:04:55,085 --> 00:04:57,705 - No one's been down my abbey for a long time, 119 00:04:57,806 --> 00:04:59,066 I can tell you that. - No, do not tell me, 120 00:04:59,166 --> 00:05:00,386 I don't wanna know. 121 00:05:00,486 --> 00:05:02,106 Why are we even doing a workshop here? 122 00:05:02,207 --> 00:05:03,267 Posh people get everything, man, 123 00:05:03,367 --> 00:05:04,507 we can't even have our own crime 124 00:05:04,607 --> 00:05:05,627 without them taking that too. 125 00:05:05,727 --> 00:05:07,787 - We treat without judgement , remember? 126 00:05:07,888 --> 00:05:09,108 - These lot don't need me. 127 00:05:09,208 --> 00:05:12,388 Ain't no duke shanking up some next duke in a postcode war. 128 00:05:12,488 --> 00:05:14,188 - [Girls] Good afternoon. 129 00:05:14,289 --> 00:05:15,429 - Afternoon. 130 00:05:15,529 --> 00:05:20,529 ♪♪ 131 00:05:22,810 --> 00:05:23,870 ♪♪ 132 00:05:23,970 --> 00:05:28,390 - Okay, Jo, as I said before, REACT, 133 00:05:28,491 --> 00:05:31,671 recognise, engage, actively listen, 134 00:05:31,771 --> 00:05:34,271 check risk and talk are a framework 135 00:05:34,372 --> 00:05:36,752 for a mental wellness conversation with your staff, 136 00:05:36,852 --> 00:05:38,632 which is why I think it's so important, 137 00:05:38,733 --> 00:05:40,633 that you've added words of your own. 138 00:05:40,733 --> 00:05:42,033 - Got it, George. 139 00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:44,133 - Okay. 140 00:05:46,054 --> 00:05:46,754 Great, Jo. 141 00:05:46,854 --> 00:05:48,114 - Thanks, George. - Really mature. 142 00:05:48,214 --> 00:05:49,234 - Sorry I'm late or whatever. 143 00:05:49,334 --> 00:05:51,684 No one would give up their seat for me on the bus. 144 00:05:51,775 --> 00:05:54,315 Pensioners can be so entitled, don't you think? 145 00:05:54,415 --> 00:05:56,475 (Spencer clears throat) 146 00:05:56,576 --> 00:05:58,916 I'll be fine, I just, I just need somewhere to decompress. 147 00:05:59,016 --> 00:06:00,516 - How about the stock cupboard, 148 00:06:00,616 --> 00:06:03,956 where you should've been hours ago? 149 00:06:04,057 --> 00:06:05,397 - Indoor voice please, I'm an HSP. 150 00:06:05,497 --> 00:06:07,877 - What the fuck's an HSP? 151 00:06:07,977 --> 00:06:09,957 - Highly sensitive person. - That's not a thing. 152 00:06:10,058 --> 00:06:11,118 - I self-identify as one. 153 00:06:11,218 --> 00:06:13,078 - Yes, we will happily make reasonable adjustments 154 00:06:13,178 --> 00:06:14,438 to accommodate your needs. 155 00:06:14,539 --> 00:06:16,539 - Needs? I don't do needs. 156 00:06:19,739 --> 00:06:22,359 So get off my udders, let's get to work, you melt. 157 00:06:22,460 --> 00:06:25,720 (Spencer sighing) 158 00:06:25,820 --> 00:06:27,160 Christ! 159 00:06:27,261 --> 00:06:28,841 (mellow upbeat music) 160 00:06:28,941 --> 00:06:30,761 ♪ Ooh ♪ 161 00:06:30,861 --> 00:06:33,281 ♪ Oh ♪ 162 00:06:33,382 --> 00:06:36,682 - If she gets violent, I'm throwing this over her head. 163 00:06:36,782 --> 00:06:37,962 (Gary knocking) 164 00:06:38,062 --> 00:06:41,122 - We're just gonna take a look at your pick line, alright? 165 00:06:41,223 --> 00:06:43,403 (door clicking) 166 00:06:43,503 --> 00:06:44,883 - Hi, guys, ready to go? 167 00:06:44,984 --> 00:06:46,884 - It's not the Tasha I was expecting. 168 00:06:46,984 --> 00:06:48,204 - What are you doing here? 169 00:06:48,304 --> 00:06:53,174 I'm entitled to confidential medical care, so go away! 170 00:06:53,265 --> 00:06:54,045 - There she is. 171 00:06:54,145 --> 00:06:57,245 - Well, we can't have this, can we? 172 00:06:57,346 --> 00:06:59,886 Stop all your lovely meds coming through. 173 00:06:59,986 --> 00:07:03,846 Kareshma, I might need a hand here. 174 00:07:03,947 --> 00:07:07,627 Oh, I think we might need a doodah from the van. 175 00:07:08,748 --> 00:07:09,808 (door thudding) 176 00:07:09,908 --> 00:07:11,608 There are no doodahs. 177 00:07:11,708 --> 00:07:14,048 - No shit, you're literally couldn't have made it more 178 00:07:14,148 --> 00:07:15,368 obvious we're speaking about her? 179 00:07:15,469 --> 00:07:17,089 - I don't know, I'm quite good at subterfuge. 180 00:07:17,189 --> 00:07:19,249 - Okay, okay, okay. 181 00:07:19,349 --> 00:07:21,129 She knows how much she needs that line, 182 00:07:21,230 --> 00:07:23,290 but she's obviously pulled it out herself. 183 00:07:23,390 --> 00:07:24,330 The question is why? (door clicking) 184 00:07:24,430 --> 00:07:26,490 - Hey, you guys ready to go 185 00:07:26,590 --> 00:07:28,790 or do you need more time to talk about me? 186 00:07:30,311 --> 00:07:31,251 (melodic upbeat music) 187 00:07:31,351 --> 00:07:36,031 ♪ Get it, get it, get it wherever I can ♪ 188 00:07:37,592 --> 00:07:39,372 - Wait, sorry, can you just show me again? 189 00:07:39,473 --> 00:07:41,693 - I just showed you a minute ago, you twassock. 190 00:07:41,793 --> 00:07:44,893 - Yeah, but I was texting, so I didn't really listen. 191 00:07:44,994 --> 00:07:46,934 - It's not cryptic, mate. 192 00:07:47,034 --> 00:07:49,574 You're a re-stocker, you grab the medical shit, 193 00:07:49,674 --> 00:07:52,064 you take it to the neenaws, you get the old shit out, 194 00:07:52,155 --> 00:07:53,895 you put the fresh shit in. 195 00:07:53,995 --> 00:07:57,375 - Okay, put the fresh shit in, okay, got it, thank you. 196 00:07:57,476 --> 00:07:59,456 (door thudding) 197 00:07:59,556 --> 00:08:00,776 (camera clicking) 198 00:08:00,876 --> 00:08:04,036 (school bell ringing) 199 00:08:06,037 --> 00:08:08,617 - Please wait here, sir will be with you soon. 200 00:08:08,717 --> 00:08:10,697 - Oh, thanks, duck. 201 00:08:10,798 --> 00:08:13,138 I got my level one BSL on Wowcher. 202 00:08:13,238 --> 00:08:15,538 - Another language for you to beg for innit. 203 00:08:15,639 --> 00:08:18,219 Here, have you seen how much it costs to come here? 204 00:08:18,319 --> 00:08:19,659 I can't inspire these kids, 205 00:08:19,759 --> 00:08:21,499 they're already making more money than me 206 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:22,500 and they're only 12. 207 00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:25,660 - You're a right "Les Misérables" today. 208 00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:27,500 - Yes, this place has got me shook. 209 00:08:27,601 --> 00:08:29,861 They don't usually let men that look like me 210 00:08:29,961 --> 00:08:31,141 in gaffs like this. 211 00:08:31,241 --> 00:08:33,381 - Eric Ubercama, headmaster, 212 00:08:33,482 --> 00:08:37,382 really pleased to meet you both, please follow me. 213 00:08:37,482 --> 00:08:39,802 - Bet no one calls him Puff Puff. 214 00:08:46,444 --> 00:08:48,104 - Just tell us what you did. 215 00:08:48,204 --> 00:08:49,944 - I was having a Zoom disco with my mates 216 00:08:50,044 --> 00:08:52,514 and they got stuck when I was dancing. 217 00:08:52,605 --> 00:08:56,465 - Oh, I love a boogie, my kids are always filming me. 218 00:08:56,565 --> 00:08:58,585 - So that they can put it on the internet 219 00:08:58,686 --> 00:09:00,686 for strangers to laugh at, Gary. 220 00:09:02,286 --> 00:09:04,226 So do you really expect me to believe 221 00:09:04,327 --> 00:09:06,827 you can't keep a pick line in? 222 00:09:06,927 --> 00:09:09,787 - You have to get me out of here, it's my mum, 223 00:09:09,888 --> 00:09:12,268 she's in deep fucking denial 224 00:09:12,368 --> 00:09:15,788 and she's a Keep Calm and Carry On mug in jeggings. 225 00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:20,349 So I'm not calm, I am fucking furious and nobody gets it. 226 00:09:20,449 --> 00:09:22,449 Uh! 227 00:09:22,970 --> 00:09:25,390 - I think I'm starting to. 228 00:09:25,490 --> 00:09:29,170 (melodic suspenseful music) 229 00:09:41,133 --> 00:09:43,033 - You are going to have to speak at some point. 230 00:09:43,133 --> 00:09:43,993 - Will I though? 231 00:09:44,093 --> 00:09:46,093 - You're speaking now. 232 00:09:46,694 --> 00:09:47,874 - Am I though? 233 00:09:47,974 --> 00:09:51,114 - If I were leading a wellness conversation with my team, 234 00:09:51,214 --> 00:09:53,264 I'd start with some personal disclosure. 235 00:09:54,535 --> 00:09:55,995 You'll find your own way with this, 236 00:09:56,095 --> 00:09:58,035 but I'll just model the language for you. 237 00:09:58,136 --> 00:10:00,496 You could start with something like, 238 00:10:02,096 --> 00:10:04,976 I'm George, three years sober, 239 00:10:06,017 --> 00:10:09,557 biggest fear, people find my insights annoying. 240 00:10:09,657 --> 00:10:11,657 - I'm Jo, 241 00:10:12,258 --> 00:10:14,258 got totally rat-arsed last night 242 00:10:15,258 --> 00:10:17,438 and I can confirm you are a total ball ache. 243 00:10:17,539 --> 00:10:18,639 (Darrell knocking) 244 00:10:18,739 --> 00:10:19,479 - I'm busy! 245 00:10:19,579 --> 00:10:21,879 - Lads, come on in. 246 00:10:21,980 --> 00:10:22,720 (door clicking) 247 00:10:22,820 --> 00:10:26,020 - We've got a question for you, well, Darrell does. 248 00:10:26,980 --> 00:10:31,320 - Jo, I need a wife and I couldn't think of anyone lovelier 249 00:10:31,421 --> 00:10:35,461 or more cleverer or more legally British to marry. 250 00:10:37,222 --> 00:10:39,002 - Absolutely fuck, no. 251 00:10:39,102 --> 00:10:43,242 - George, I need a wife and I couldn't think of anyone 252 00:10:43,343 --> 00:10:46,223 lovelier or cleverer or more legally British to marry. 253 00:10:47,384 --> 00:10:49,384 - Oh, she's tempted, Darrell. 254 00:10:51,024 --> 00:10:53,274 - Please, it'll help my mental health. 255 00:10:56,385 --> 00:10:59,045 - You know, one knife wound can kill you. 256 00:10:59,146 --> 00:11:01,686 Well, not yous, 'cause you're not really 257 00:11:01,786 --> 00:11:03,286 about that life, innit? (laughs) 258 00:11:03,386 --> 00:11:06,766 - Could you turn on the hearing loop so we can all hear you? 259 00:11:06,867 --> 00:11:09,367 - What, this thing? - Yes. 260 00:11:09,467 --> 00:11:10,347 (switch clicking) (feedback whining) 261 00:11:10,428 --> 00:11:12,428 - Thank you. 262 00:11:12,788 --> 00:11:15,128 - Anyway, as I was saying, people under a- 263 00:11:15,228 --> 00:11:15,928 - Jennifer, 264 00:11:16,028 --> 00:11:18,368 ah, can you put the music on please? 265 00:11:18,469 --> 00:11:19,529 (Jennifer sighing) (switch clicking) 266 00:11:19,629 --> 00:11:21,629 (soft melodic music) Thank you. 267 00:11:22,590 --> 00:11:24,530 ♪ Selector, selector ♪ 268 00:11:24,630 --> 00:11:25,370 - Jesus! 269 00:11:25,470 --> 00:11:26,770 ♪ Into selector ♪ 270 00:11:26,870 --> 00:11:28,770 (audience laughing) 271 00:11:28,871 --> 00:11:32,651 ♪ Man up in the whip with a bally on ♪ 272 00:11:32,751 --> 00:11:33,851 ♪ It takes one ♪ 273 00:11:33,951 --> 00:11:35,371 - [Maleek] What are you doing? 274 00:11:35,472 --> 00:11:36,852 - Rapping, what's it look like? 275 00:11:36,952 --> 00:11:39,412 - That is not rap. - Would you do it then? 276 00:11:39,512 --> 00:11:42,252 - Look, just give me the thing, man. (tuts) 277 00:11:42,353 --> 00:11:44,353 This is shit. 278 00:11:44,993 --> 00:11:47,733 ♪ Yo, if you've got your own, that's three times more ♪ 279 00:11:47,834 --> 00:11:49,414 ♪ More time before the knives get drawn ♪ 280 00:11:49,514 --> 00:11:50,774 ♪ Stay safe, stay in school ♪ 281 00:11:50,874 --> 00:11:52,344 ♪ 'Cause that's what the really real Gs, them do ♪ 282 00:11:52,435 --> 00:11:53,615 ♪ Bread Roman ain't got nish ♪ 283 00:11:53,715 --> 00:11:55,215 ♪ Not nish, but big, bad news ♪ 284 00:11:55,315 --> 00:11:56,415 ♪ Fit in there with your Gs ♪ 285 00:11:56,515 --> 00:11:58,015 ♪ Your only Gs should be your GCSEs ♪ 286 00:11:58,115 --> 00:11:59,495 ♪ So please take this message from me ♪ 287 00:11:59,596 --> 00:12:00,376 ♪ It takes one ♪ 288 00:12:00,476 --> 00:12:01,776 ♪ Yeah, that's right, it takes one ♪ 289 00:12:01,876 --> 00:12:03,296 ♪ Yeah, that's right, it takes one ♪ 290 00:12:03,396 --> 00:12:04,096 - Yeah. 291 00:12:04,196 --> 00:12:07,176 ♪ Yeah, that's right, it takes one ♪ 292 00:12:07,277 --> 00:12:12,037 (audience applauding unenthusiastically) 293 00:12:13,638 --> 00:12:15,578 Questions? 294 00:12:15,678 --> 00:12:16,618 Yeah? 295 00:12:16,719 --> 00:12:19,119 - How much does a paramedic earn? 296 00:12:20,359 --> 00:12:21,659 - 34,000. - 30,000. 297 00:12:21,759 --> 00:12:22,819 What? 298 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:25,420 - I'll pay you 35,000 pounds, 299 00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:27,060 if you promise not to rap again. 300 00:12:27,160 --> 00:12:27,960 (audience laughing) 301 00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:29,820 Sir, are you gonna let her talk to me like that? 302 00:12:29,921 --> 00:12:31,461 - Maddie. - I'm sorry, sir, 303 00:12:31,561 --> 00:12:34,301 but I find it patronising, reductive and try hard. 304 00:12:34,401 --> 00:12:35,861 (audience laughing) 305 00:12:35,962 --> 00:12:37,862 - Your mum's patronising and reductive. 306 00:12:37,962 --> 00:12:38,782 - Ssh! - That's why 307 00:12:38,882 --> 00:12:40,502 they should beat kids in school though. 308 00:12:40,602 --> 00:12:42,902 This is you and this stupid rap. 309 00:12:43,003 --> 00:12:44,863 (mellow upbeat music) 310 00:12:44,963 --> 00:12:47,663 ♪♪ 311 00:12:47,764 --> 00:12:49,224 (Jo humming) 312 00:12:49,324 --> 00:12:50,504 (files thudding) 313 00:12:50,604 --> 00:12:52,544 - There's no point doing this, 314 00:12:52,644 --> 00:12:54,354 I'm never gonna get you on side with this, am I? 315 00:12:54,445 --> 00:12:59,445 - There you go, something we agree on finally. 316 00:13:00,806 --> 00:13:03,366 - I'm going to use some direct language now, Jo. 317 00:13:04,726 --> 00:13:06,386 I underestimated you. - It's alright, George, 318 00:13:06,487 --> 00:13:09,727 so did my army PT, she's twice the bloke you'll ever be. 319 00:13:11,448 --> 00:13:13,468 - If you won't take the mental health 320 00:13:13,568 --> 00:13:15,988 of this depot seriously, then I'm afraid 321 00:13:16,088 --> 00:13:18,288 Regional will find someone who will. 322 00:13:20,529 --> 00:13:22,789 Am I making myself clear? 323 00:13:22,889 --> 00:13:24,589 - Are you saying that I don't have to do 324 00:13:24,690 --> 00:13:26,690 this mental health toss at South Hill? 325 00:13:28,090 --> 00:13:30,090 Result. 326 00:13:33,331 --> 00:13:35,071 (students chattering) 327 00:13:35,172 --> 00:13:35,992 - Bye. 328 00:13:36,092 --> 00:13:37,752 - That was a bit savage, wasn't it? 329 00:13:37,852 --> 00:13:39,392 - I told you this was just a waste of time. 330 00:13:39,492 --> 00:13:41,272 - All the kids, they say stuff, 331 00:13:41,373 --> 00:13:42,673 you don't normally let it get to you. 332 00:13:42,773 --> 00:13:44,833 - Yeah, but that's the hood kids, 333 00:13:44,933 --> 00:13:46,153 it's hood kids, it's different. 334 00:13:46,253 --> 00:13:47,473 You let them cuss you out, 335 00:13:47,574 --> 00:13:49,114 'cause you know you're saving lives there, 336 00:13:49,214 --> 00:13:50,834 but we're just a joke thing to these lot, man, 337 00:13:50,934 --> 00:13:52,994 ain't none of them gonna be paramedics. 338 00:13:53,094 --> 00:13:55,044 Posh pricks, like little dickead, Maddie. 339 00:13:55,135 --> 00:13:57,115 What's she know about rap? 340 00:13:57,215 --> 00:13:59,235 Fool, this is bullshit, man. 341 00:13:59,336 --> 00:14:02,356 (feedback whining) - Maleek, the hearing loop. 342 00:14:02,456 --> 00:14:04,456 - Oh, I'm not stupid, it's off. 343 00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:11,097 - Maybe she won't tell anyone. 344 00:14:14,938 --> 00:14:16,798 - She's gonna snitch. 345 00:14:16,898 --> 00:14:21,358 - I'm not even angry, I'm just really disappointed. 346 00:14:21,459 --> 00:14:24,199 (school bell ringing) 347 00:14:24,300 --> 00:14:26,800 - Look, sir, or sire, whatever, 348 00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:30,640 this whole thing was just a big mistake, yes? 349 00:14:30,741 --> 00:14:33,481 So we're gonna leave you to your marking and that. 350 00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:37,181 - Hold it, the bell doesn't dismiss you, I dismiss you. 351 00:14:40,422 --> 00:14:42,282 Now you're going to finish this little workshop, 352 00:14:42,383 --> 00:14:43,723 because I happen to think it's important 353 00:14:43,823 --> 00:14:46,683 our students are prepared for anything life throws at them. 354 00:14:46,783 --> 00:14:48,983 But first an apology. 355 00:14:50,064 --> 00:14:50,804 Maddie. 356 00:14:50,904 --> 00:14:52,904 (door clicking) - Oh. 357 00:14:53,705 --> 00:14:54,845 (door thudding) Crack on, Maddie, 358 00:14:54,945 --> 00:14:56,365 it's your time you're wasting. 359 00:14:56,465 --> 00:14:59,325 - I think he means you apologise to her. 360 00:14:59,425 --> 00:15:00,965 - But sir. 361 00:15:01,066 --> 00:15:02,806 - Now. 362 00:15:02,906 --> 00:15:04,646 - (tuts) Sorry, Maddie. 363 00:15:04,746 --> 00:15:07,326 - Whatever, just no more rap, yeah. 364 00:15:07,427 --> 00:15:08,407 - Hm. 365 00:15:08,507 --> 00:15:10,047 Can I go now, sir? 366 00:15:10,147 --> 00:15:12,147 - Off you go. 367 00:15:13,108 --> 00:15:15,888 ♪ Give it ♪ 368 00:15:15,988 --> 00:15:18,088 ♪ Oh, ooh ♪ 369 00:15:18,189 --> 00:15:18,929 ♪ Give it ♪ 370 00:15:19,029 --> 00:15:21,249 - It's bit of a dick move taking your anger out 371 00:15:21,349 --> 00:15:23,769 on something you need like a pick line. 372 00:15:23,870 --> 00:15:25,870 - Not my best work obvi. 373 00:15:26,750 --> 00:15:28,690 - And obvi, as an NHS professional, 374 00:15:28,790 --> 00:15:31,690 I would never encourage you to destroy anything 375 00:15:31,791 --> 00:15:33,131 or smash anything up. 376 00:15:33,231 --> 00:15:35,891 - No, no, crikey, no. 377 00:15:35,992 --> 00:15:38,212 - But I wonder what would happen, 378 00:15:38,312 --> 00:15:41,592 if you ripped the literal shit out of this schoolwork. 379 00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:46,333 (paper tearing) 380 00:15:46,433 --> 00:15:48,053 There you go. 381 00:15:48,154 --> 00:15:49,534 (paper tearing) 382 00:15:49,634 --> 00:15:53,594 And what about that shit over there, how about that? 383 00:15:54,755 --> 00:15:56,255 - Come on. 384 00:15:56,355 --> 00:15:57,855 (objects clattering) 385 00:15:57,955 --> 00:15:59,855 (Gary laughing) - Yes! 386 00:15:59,956 --> 00:16:02,616 - Tasha, what the heck is going on? 387 00:16:02,716 --> 00:16:05,056 - I'm fucking angry, Mum, 388 00:16:05,156 --> 00:16:09,056 not hacking, really fucking angry. 389 00:16:09,157 --> 00:16:10,937 Aren't you? 390 00:16:11,037 --> 00:16:13,657 - Of course I'm fucking angry. 391 00:16:13,758 --> 00:16:16,138 - It's like good to show it sometimes, 392 00:16:16,238 --> 00:16:18,958 you don't need to act like everything's okay. 393 00:16:21,199 --> 00:16:23,199 - Fine. 394 00:16:23,679 --> 00:16:24,479 (kick thudding) (objects clattering) 395 00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:25,620 - Yes, Mum! 396 00:16:25,720 --> 00:16:26,980 (melodic upbeat music) - Tasha, the bear. 397 00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:28,500 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 398 00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:30,260 (bag tearing) - Aw, poor bear! 399 00:16:30,361 --> 00:16:32,501 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 400 00:16:32,601 --> 00:16:34,461 (Tasha shrieking) (guitar thudding) 401 00:16:34,561 --> 00:16:36,461 - We should leave them to it. 402 00:16:36,562 --> 00:16:37,302 - Hm. 403 00:16:37,402 --> 00:16:38,782 (Tasha shrieking) (guitar thudding) 404 00:16:38,882 --> 00:16:41,062 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 405 00:16:41,162 --> 00:16:43,462 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 406 00:16:43,563 --> 00:16:45,383 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 407 00:16:45,483 --> 00:16:47,063 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 408 00:16:47,163 --> 00:16:49,583 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 409 00:16:49,684 --> 00:16:53,604 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 410 00:16:56,445 --> 00:16:59,605 (audience chattering) 411 00:17:03,206 --> 00:17:05,786 - Can we have some baba baba? 412 00:17:05,886 --> 00:17:07,746 Ah, thanks. 413 00:17:07,847 --> 00:17:10,707 Yo, Jennifer, hit the lights please, my G. 414 00:17:10,807 --> 00:17:12,827 (Jennifer sighing) (switch clicking) 415 00:17:12,928 --> 00:17:16,648 Nice, okay, so remember, guys, BPN. 416 00:17:18,569 --> 00:17:21,749 B, leave the blade in, 417 00:17:21,849 --> 00:17:24,349 P, apply pressure to the wound. 418 00:17:24,449 --> 00:17:27,869 Now you can use anything, clothes if you have them. 419 00:17:27,970 --> 00:17:29,870 And finally N, 420 00:17:29,970 --> 00:17:33,310 call 999. (laughing awkwardly) 421 00:17:33,411 --> 00:17:35,711 This is... Wendy? 422 00:17:35,811 --> 00:17:38,431 - Right, well, these might look like a horror film, 423 00:17:38,532 --> 00:17:40,972 but they're actual photos of knife wounds. 424 00:17:42,492 --> 00:17:45,332 (girls screaming) 425 00:17:46,653 --> 00:17:48,233 - Wendy, what are you doing? 426 00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:50,953 Those aren't school slides, those are surgeon's slides. 427 00:17:51,054 --> 00:17:52,994 - They said they didn't want be patronised. 428 00:17:53,094 --> 00:17:55,124 - Yeah, but they don't want bloody PTSD either. 429 00:17:55,215 --> 00:17:57,755 Look what you've done to the poor kids then. 430 00:17:57,855 --> 00:18:00,715 (girl vomiting) - Oh. 431 00:18:00,816 --> 00:18:04,436 - Oh, she's being sick, uh! 432 00:18:04,536 --> 00:18:07,436 (mellow upbeat music) 433 00:18:07,537 --> 00:18:10,757 ♪♪ 434 00:18:10,857 --> 00:18:12,997 - [Darrell] Ah, Spencer, how was the first day? 435 00:18:13,098 --> 00:18:14,398 - Do you know what, actually amazing. 436 00:18:14,498 --> 00:18:16,958 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was wondering if you knew any chicks 437 00:18:17,058 --> 00:18:19,198 you could set me up with to marry? 438 00:18:19,299 --> 00:18:20,599 - Ugh, heteronormative. 439 00:18:20,699 --> 00:18:22,519 - It's just so Darrell can stay in the country. 440 00:18:22,619 --> 00:18:24,439 The person just needs to have a British passport. 441 00:18:24,539 --> 00:18:25,279 - Wow and racist. 442 00:18:25,380 --> 00:18:27,160 Do you know what, you both disgust me. 443 00:18:27,260 --> 00:18:29,000 - I'm so sorry for being a racist. 444 00:18:29,100 --> 00:18:30,320 - [Darrell] That's it then. 445 00:18:30,420 --> 00:18:31,680 - Only one option left. 446 00:18:31,781 --> 00:18:35,161 - I'm gonna have to marry your mum and become your stepdad. 447 00:18:35,261 --> 00:18:37,321 - Could you teach me how to ride a bike? 448 00:18:37,422 --> 00:18:38,282 - Sure, kiddo. 449 00:18:38,382 --> 00:18:41,722 - Welcome to the family! 450 00:18:41,822 --> 00:18:43,442 (belt clicking) 451 00:18:43,543 --> 00:18:45,203 - Thanks, Kareshma. 452 00:18:45,303 --> 00:18:48,143 - Hm, literally just doing my job. 453 00:19:02,066 --> 00:19:04,206 (ambulance door thudding) 454 00:19:04,306 --> 00:19:05,166 What? 455 00:19:05,266 --> 00:19:07,166 - Nothing, it's just you don't want to get 456 00:19:07,267 --> 00:19:08,767 too close to the patients. 457 00:19:08,867 --> 00:19:10,867 - As if. 458 00:19:12,907 --> 00:19:14,007 (drawer thudding) 459 00:19:14,108 --> 00:19:15,648 (plastic rustling) 460 00:19:15,748 --> 00:19:18,048 - [Lawrence] Alright, Jo. 461 00:19:18,148 --> 00:19:21,088 - Alright, Loz. - How did it go with George? 462 00:19:21,189 --> 00:19:22,689 - All sorted. - Why are you doing this? 463 00:19:22,789 --> 00:19:24,209 Where's the new guy? 464 00:19:24,309 --> 00:19:26,729 - He's taking a daylight break. 465 00:19:26,830 --> 00:19:28,330 - Oh. - What a twat. 466 00:19:28,430 --> 00:19:31,430 - Hm, good, 'cause I don't want any witnesses to this. 467 00:19:34,671 --> 00:19:36,451 (Lawrence imitating gunshot) 468 00:19:36,551 --> 00:19:38,531 .44 to the face, yeah. 469 00:19:38,632 --> 00:19:41,252 - Oh, you'd be out the door, if you shot that in here. 470 00:19:41,352 --> 00:19:43,012 - Not if I stayed soft through the knees 471 00:19:43,112 --> 00:19:44,172 at the point of release. 472 00:19:44,273 --> 00:19:46,173 - [Jo] No, kick like a mule on that. 473 00:19:46,273 --> 00:19:47,293 - [Lawrence] Hm. 474 00:19:47,393 --> 00:19:50,093 (mellow upbeat music) 475 00:19:50,194 --> 00:19:52,354 ♪♪ 476 00:19:53,754 --> 00:19:55,784 - Oh, Spencer, how was your first day? 477 00:19:55,875 --> 00:19:56,895 - Do you know what? 478 00:19:56,995 --> 00:19:58,375 I'm so tired, I can't even talk about it. 479 00:19:58,475 --> 00:19:59,855 There is a long hours culture at this place, 480 00:19:59,955 --> 00:20:01,955 that's very unhealthy. 481 00:20:04,116 --> 00:20:09,016 - Wenders, ah, I thought it was weird a mama bear like you 482 00:20:09,117 --> 00:20:12,977 would walk out on her only son, totally get it now. 483 00:20:13,077 --> 00:20:15,417 - You could do us both a favour and sack him. 484 00:20:15,518 --> 00:20:18,098 - Well, I could, but I'm not a quitter. 485 00:20:18,198 --> 00:20:21,098 I've bested worse grunts than him, I will break him first, 486 00:20:21,199 --> 00:20:23,279 then hand his arse back to you in pieces. 487 00:20:26,360 --> 00:20:27,940 - Right. 488 00:20:28,040 --> 00:20:30,980 (mellow upbeat music) 489 00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:32,020 - [Darryl] I'm scared. 490 00:20:32,121 --> 00:20:34,021 - You're doing really well, son. 491 00:20:34,121 --> 00:20:35,821 - Don't let go. 492 00:20:35,921 --> 00:20:37,021 - I won't. 493 00:20:37,121 --> 00:20:39,141 - Don't let go, 494 00:20:39,242 --> 00:20:41,142 please. (bicycle whirring) 495 00:20:41,242 --> 00:20:43,342 - That's my boy. 496 00:20:43,442 --> 00:20:48,442 ♪ Ooh ooh ♪ 497 00:20:49,483 --> 00:20:52,463 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 498 00:20:52,564 --> 00:20:53,784 ♪ Yeah ♪ 499 00:20:53,884 --> 00:20:57,394 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 500 00:20:57,485 --> 00:20:58,785 ♪ Yeah ♪ 501 00:20:58,885 --> 00:21:02,465 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 502 00:21:02,566 --> 00:21:03,946 ♪ Yeah ♪ 503 00:21:04,046 --> 00:21:06,706 ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 504 00:21:06,806 --> 00:21:07,866 (hammer thudding) 505 00:21:07,967 --> 00:21:09,427 (man thudding to floor) - Uh! 506 00:21:09,527 --> 00:21:12,687 (light melodic music)