1
00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:25,359
Okay, shot of bourbon, beer chaser,

2
00:00:25,526 --> 00:00:29,279
bloody Mary without Tabasco,
bloody Mary with extra Tabasco,

3
00:00:29,488 --> 00:00:32,699
coffee, cream, sugar,
Sweet'N Low,

4
00:00:32,908 --> 00:00:35,869
CC, water back, pretzels,

5
00:00:36,078 --> 00:00:40,082
pitcher of water
with three glasses.

6
00:00:42,251 --> 00:00:44,044
Those are our drinks.

7
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:51,134
I'm terribly sorry.

8
00:00:53,136 --> 00:00:56,056
I don't suppose I could impose
upon you people

9
00:00:56,223 --> 00:00:57,975
to save me a few steps and...

10
00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,606
This is great. Thank you.

11
00:01:04,815 --> 00:01:09,444
Really, thanks so much.
Free pretzels for everybody.

12
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,819
- Afternoon, everybody.
- Norm!

13
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:34,571
Norman.

14
00:02:34,738 --> 00:02:37,115
- Beer, Norm?
- Yeah, I've heard of that stuff.

15
00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:39,534
Better give me a tall one
in case I like it.

16
00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:43,455
Another day, another dollar,
huh, Norm?

17
00:02:43,664 --> 00:02:45,582
Fifty cents after taxes.

18
00:02:45,791 --> 00:02:48,585
- Hey, Norm.
- Hey, girl. How's the kids?

19
00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:51,797
Two of them are ugly, one's
obnoxious, and one's just stupid.

20
00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:53,632
He's my favorite.

21
00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:02,808
- Get me Gus.
- Oh, yes, sir, right away.

22
00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:06,561
- Gus who?
- Listen, don't be a wise guy.

23
00:03:06,728 --> 00:03:09,815
- Just get him.
- All right. Yes, sir.

24
00:03:09,981 --> 00:03:11,441
Norm,

25
00:03:11,608 --> 00:03:13,443
- do you know a Gus?
- Gus who?

26
00:03:14,653 --> 00:03:16,530
He hates that question.

27
00:03:20,075 --> 00:03:24,454
- Gus, the owner of this bar.
- Oh, I know who you mean.

28
00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:27,124
Yeah, that was two owners ago.

29
00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:30,877
Never forget that guy because
he had such a great name: Gus.

30
00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:34,631
I came all the way from Seattle
just to talk to him.

31
00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,426
Gus is the man. You got troubles,
you take them to Gus.

32
00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:39,261
He straightens you up just like that.

33
00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:42,639
I gotta be back in Seattle Thursday
night. What am I gonna do?

34
00:03:42,848 --> 00:03:44,933
Take it easy, will you, huh?

35
00:03:45,142 --> 00:03:50,731
Listen, I managed in the minors,
I coached in the majors.

36
00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:53,150
I've been a bartender for five years.

37
00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:55,819
I've had my share of people
with problems.

38
00:03:56,027 --> 00:03:58,238
Why don't you give me a try?

39
00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:03,702
Last semester, my son comes home
from college with his new fiancé,

40
00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:07,247
- who's black.
- And your son's not?

41
00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,045
Yo, Coach.

42
00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:15,589
Get Gus.

43
00:04:17,716 --> 00:04:18,800
I'll make a few calls.

44
00:04:19,134 --> 00:04:21,303
Good idea. Give me a Scotch.
I'll be right back.

45
00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:25,056
Holy...

46
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:26,349
- What's the matter?
- Norm?

47
00:04:26,558 --> 00:04:28,977
Somebody pinch me.
I gotta be hallucinating.

48
00:04:29,186 --> 00:04:30,395
Look at those legs.

49
00:04:30,687 --> 00:04:33,732
If those legs are attached to anything,
even a truck, I'm gonna marry it.

50
00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:38,779
Oh, please come down here.
Please come-- She's coming down!

51
00:04:40,322 --> 00:04:42,908
All right, everybody,
just act natural.

52
00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:44,910
This I gotta see.

53
00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:47,454
I don't believe this.

54
00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:52,584
I feel like I've been transported in time
back to a fraternity house in the '50s.

55
00:04:52,751 --> 00:04:54,920
Come on, guys. In this day and age,

56
00:04:55,086 --> 00:04:57,506
aren't we a little beyond
ogling women?

57
00:04:59,049 --> 00:05:00,008
Holy...

58
00:05:02,719 --> 00:05:04,554
Norm, is that the one?

59
00:05:08,725 --> 00:05:10,060
- Hi.
- Hi.

60
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,188
Excuse me, miss.

61
00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:14,981
The gentleman at the other end
of the bar

62
00:05:15,232 --> 00:05:16,817
would like to buy you an automobile.

63
00:05:23,615 --> 00:05:26,326
- May I help you?
- White wine, please.

64
00:05:26,535 --> 00:05:27,911
White wine.

65
00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:30,789
Allow me. Hey, I got it,
I got it, I got it.

66
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:39,047
- Thank you very much.
- Very welcome.

67
00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:44,678
Don't get your hopes up, boys.

68
00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:49,099
As soon as Sam comes out here,
it's dinner for two at his place.

69
00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:51,476
Oh, come on.

70
00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:55,480
I hardly think that's the sort of woman
Sam would go out with.

71
00:05:55,647 --> 00:05:58,650
Hey, listen, she may not
be flashy enough for Sammy.

72
00:06:00,443 --> 00:06:03,071
They had Sammy in mind
when they built her.

73
00:06:04,030 --> 00:06:05,031
Really?

74
00:06:05,907 --> 00:06:07,242
Oh, I don't buy that.

75
00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:09,619
Now, I know I've only worked here
a short time,

76
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:12,706
but it seems to me Sam
has more depth than that.

77
00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:15,917
Follow me.

78
00:06:22,966 --> 00:06:24,926
Sam, would you come out here
for a second?

79
00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:28,054
Carla, never disturb me--
Unless there's a customer.

80
00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:32,851
No, no, no, don't drink that.

81
00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:35,645
Got something much better.

82
00:06:36,855 --> 00:06:40,775
I think you're gonna like this.
It's an amusing little wine.

83
00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:41,985
You like to laugh?

84
00:06:43,445 --> 00:06:46,573
- I love to laugh. How did you know?
- Call it a hunch.

85
00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:50,118
The great ones make it look so easy.

86
00:06:52,287 --> 00:06:53,747
You think there's a chance
that you and I

87
00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:56,124
could go someplace
and laugh together?

88
00:06:58,543 --> 00:07:00,879
My mother told me to watch out
for guys in bars.

89
00:07:01,046 --> 00:07:03,381
Well, then, let's get out of this bar
so you don't have to worry.

90
00:07:06,051 --> 00:07:07,427
I do feel like a movie tonight.

91
00:07:08,553 --> 00:07:12,349
You know, I've been in the mood
for a movie all day long.

92
00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:15,977
- What kind of movie shall we see?
- Something short.

93
00:07:25,153 --> 00:07:27,197
Could you be a little more specific?

94
00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:29,491
Does anybody know
any good movies?

95
00:07:29,658 --> 00:07:31,743
Yeah, yeah, what's the name of that
new Australian film

96
00:07:31,910 --> 00:07:34,537
- that's supposed to be so good?
- No, no Australian films.

97
00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:35,914
I hate subtitles.

98
00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:42,253
This one's no problem. It's dubbed.

99
00:07:45,173 --> 00:07:46,424
Will you excuse me
just for a minute?

100
00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:49,135
Diane, can I talk to you
in the poolroom, please?

101
00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:52,722
- Sure.
- I'll be right back.

102
00:07:52,889 --> 00:07:53,974
What's your name?

103
00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:56,184
Brandee.

104
00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:58,645
With two E's.

105
00:08:07,612 --> 00:08:08,863
Brandee with two E's?

106
00:08:09,906 --> 00:08:12,367
Big company like this,
they spelled it wrong.

107
00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:21,835
- Okay, what was that all about?
- What was what all about?

108
00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:24,087
All that laughing and stuff.

109
00:08:24,713 --> 00:08:26,548
- 'I love to laugh."
- Hey...

110
00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:31,011
- Diane, can we have a couple of beers here?
- Oh, coming right up.

111
00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:34,347
- No, not right now.
- Sam, we're thirsty.

112
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:35,640
Drink chalk.

113
00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:42,647
Sam, I didn't mean anything by that.
I laughed.

114
00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:44,232
Life is funny.

115
00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:46,776
Correct me if I'm wrong,
but I get the impression

116
00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:48,319
that you don't approve of Brandee.

117
00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:52,741
Is that Brandy with a Y or two E's?

118
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:57,370
You know, I may just be
the dim ex-baseball player,

119
00:08:57,537 --> 00:08:59,706
and you're the postgraduate,
but I'm the boss,

120
00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:02,333
and I didn't hire you as a critic,
I hired you as a waitress.

121
00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:04,586
You'd never know it by me.

122
00:09:06,629 --> 00:09:09,049
Beer. With two E's.

123
00:09:10,425 --> 00:09:11,342
Hey, hey, hey.

124
00:09:12,761 --> 00:09:15,430
Will you guys just sit down
for a minute, please?

125
00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:19,434
Thank you.

126
00:09:20,310 --> 00:09:22,437
Now, come on, why don't you
just be honest with me?

127
00:09:22,604 --> 00:09:24,022
You think Brandee's dumb.

128
00:09:24,189 --> 00:09:27,067
- I never said that.
- Yeah, but you think she's dumb.

129
00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:31,154
- I don't know that I think that.
- Oh, Diane, she's a tree stump.

130
00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:32,989
Come on.

131
00:09:33,156 --> 00:09:36,242
Well, I guess she'll have to do
till dumb comes along.

132
00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:39,829
Well, thank you. Thank you very much.
The truth comes out.

133
00:09:39,996 --> 00:09:43,249
She's a total airhead.
incredible body, no mind. Right?

134
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:44,501
Who?

135
00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:48,421
- I don't think anything of the kind.
- Oh, come on.

136
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:52,342
To you, Brandee's just a one-night
woman, built for cheap laughs,

137
00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:55,470
- wild times and easy sex.
- Where? Where?

138
00:09:55,678 --> 00:09:59,140
- Will you just admit it? Come on.
- Hey, Sam, I got a message for you.

139
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:01,601
Your date, Miss Big Buckets,

140
00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:05,146
she told me to tell you
she's getting a little "ootsy."

141
00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:08,233
Get her out of there, Sam.

142
00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:11,069
The customers are warping the wood
with their drool.

143
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,238
Hear that?

144
00:10:16,157 --> 00:10:18,868
- Diane, come here. Listen.
- Sam, wait a minute.

145
00:10:19,077 --> 00:10:21,746
Now, I don't mean to criticize.

146
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:25,333
In a way, I was complimenting you.
I think you can do better.

147
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:27,001
I don't want to do better.

148
00:10:27,168 --> 00:10:30,630
You see, Diane, there's certain things
in this life that I really like,

149
00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:33,007
and nobody is gonna
change my mind about them.

150
00:10:33,174 --> 00:10:37,929
You see, I like fun women,
hot dogs, game shows.

151
00:10:38,096 --> 00:10:39,347
And I don't care
what anybody says about them.

152
00:10:39,556 --> 00:10:42,183
Did you read where they found
rat parts in hot dogs?

153
00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:45,436
I like rat parts.
It's my favorite part of the hot dog.

154
00:10:46,437 --> 00:10:48,273
Okay.

155
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,026
I'll tell you one more thing I like.
I like Brandee.

156
00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:55,029
You know, I sensed something
very special going on there,

157
00:10:55,196 --> 00:11:00,076
so if you'll excuse me, that very
special somebody's waiting for me.

158
00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:01,911
Fine.

159
00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:08,418
- Coach?
- Yeah.

160
00:11:09,210 --> 00:11:12,130
- Where's Brandee?
- She just left with some guy.

161
00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:15,967
- She what?
- Looked like the real thing, Sam.

162
00:11:19,137 --> 00:11:22,932
If I see one sign that you're
enjoying this, you're in a lot of trouble.

163
00:11:25,268 --> 00:11:28,146
How about a couple of beers
for the boys in the poolroom?

164
00:11:29,939 --> 00:11:31,232
Okay.

165
00:11:50,793 --> 00:11:52,212
Another beer, Norm?

166
00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:56,257
Yeah. One quick one,
then it's <i>adiós</i> for sure.

167
00:11:57,884 --> 00:12:02,305
Hey, oh... Here we go. Nope.
No, it's a guy.

168
00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:06,476
Hey, Coach.

169
00:12:07,268 --> 00:12:09,729
- Any word from Gus yet?
- Yeah, Leo.

170
00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:12,815
He can't drop by tonight. He's dead.

171
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:18,029
- Oh, no.
- Leo, it happens.

172
00:12:18,821 --> 00:12:20,823
I can't believe it. Gus is gone?

173
00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:26,663
Nobody can replace Gus.
Gus had all the answers.

174
00:12:26,829 --> 00:12:28,122
All but one.

175
00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:33,836
What am I gonna do without Gus?

176
00:12:34,003 --> 00:12:36,130
Now, Leo, will you stop it?

177
00:12:36,339 --> 00:12:40,760
I mean, ever since you came through
that door, it's been "Gus, Gus, Gus."

178
00:12:40,927 --> 00:12:45,181
I mean, it's been "Gus" this and
"Gus" that, and I'm fed up with it.

179
00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:47,976
I'm taking you on, Leo.
You and all your problems.

180
00:12:48,184 --> 00:12:50,186
- Now, come on, sit down.
- Oh, hey, I don't know--

181
00:12:50,395 --> 00:12:51,604
Sit, Leo!

182
00:12:53,439 --> 00:12:54,732
Sit!

183
00:12:58,861 --> 00:13:01,030
Lay your problems on the bar.
Come on.

184
00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:03,116
Try it, Leo. Come on,
give him a chance.

185
00:13:03,324 --> 00:13:06,077
- Come on, he's ready for you, huh?
- Nothing to be afraid of.

186
00:13:06,828 --> 00:13:10,707
Last semester, my son comes home
from college with his new fiancé,

187
00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:12,959
- who's black.
- I've been thinking about that,

188
00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:15,378
and it's a tough one,
but I think I got it.

189
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:16,879
Wait a minute,
because there's more--

190
00:13:17,088 --> 00:13:19,215
No, no, Leo-- Leo-- Well, hold it, Leo.

191
00:13:19,424 --> 00:13:22,885
Leo, it's a problem
of communication.

192
00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:25,805
Here's what you do.
When you get home,

193
00:13:25,972 --> 00:13:29,017
you sit the kids down,
and you say to your boy--

194
00:13:29,225 --> 00:13:30,393
What's your boy's name?

195
00:13:30,935 --> 00:13:31,978
Ron.

196
00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:34,522
Ron. What's Ron's fiancé's name?

197
00:13:34,689 --> 00:13:36,899
- Rick.
- Rick.

198
00:13:37,066 --> 00:13:38,943
So you say...

199
00:13:39,944 --> 00:13:42,405
You say, "Rick, Ron..."

200
00:13:43,906 --> 00:13:45,116
Rick and Ron?

201
00:13:50,580 --> 00:13:52,957
Suck it up, Coachie.
Hang tough in there.

202
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:55,752
Come on, neck up. Come on.

203
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:57,045
Well, Leo...

204
00:13:58,588 --> 00:14:03,343
Leo, if you're that unhappy
about it, just throw him out

205
00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:05,553
and tell him you never wanna
see him again.

206
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:07,889
I can't do that. I love the kid.

207
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:12,727
- Oh, I see what you're saying.
- You do? What?

208
00:14:14,062 --> 00:14:16,564
If I can't accept the kid
the way he is, I'll lose him.

209
00:14:17,607 --> 00:14:18,816
Boy, that's good.

210
00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:23,821
Well, when you put it that way,
what choice do I have?

211
00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:27,283
Thanks, Coach. You know,
you're not Gus, but you're not bad.

212
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:31,162
Leo, even Gus isn't Gus anymore.

213
00:14:32,747 --> 00:14:35,458
- Yeah. Thanks, Coach.
- All right, Coach.

214
00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:38,920
All right, Coach.

215
00:14:39,462 --> 00:14:41,923
You got him, huh, Coach?
You really took him, huh?

216
00:14:42,090 --> 00:14:45,343
Took him? I had him for breakfast.

217
00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:47,637
Hey, Coach, where's Sammy?

218
00:14:48,346 --> 00:14:50,598
- Where else?
- Oh, again!

219
00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:54,268
He's been out with a different
beautiful dolly every night this week.

220
00:14:54,435 --> 00:14:57,647
He's overcompensating for feelings
of inadequacy

221
00:14:57,855 --> 00:15:01,192
with an ostentatious display
of hormonal activity.

222
00:15:01,359 --> 00:15:02,610
That's our Sammy.

223
00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:06,406
Let me tell you something, Normie.

224
00:15:06,989 --> 00:15:09,367
There are serious drawbacks
to dating beautiful women.

225
00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:10,326
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.

226
00:15:10,493 --> 00:15:11,577
Like what?

227
00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:14,914
Like you can't eat Italian
because they're always on diets.

228
00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:18,584
You can't go outside
because the wind will muss their hair.

229
00:15:19,001 --> 00:15:20,753
And you can't go to hockey games

230
00:15:20,962 --> 00:15:23,631
because they might get hit
in the face with a puck.

231
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:26,259
Where's the fun, huh?

232
00:15:26,884 --> 00:15:29,137
Carla, the fun's in the fun.

233
00:15:29,303 --> 00:15:32,181
Oh, yes, unlimited sex.

234
00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:36,352
The adult male's version
of owning a candy store.

235
00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:41,357
But tell me, once you've consumed
as much sex

236
00:15:41,566 --> 00:15:44,485
for as long as you wanted,
what would you do then?

237
00:15:48,030 --> 00:15:49,282
I'd help the poor.

238
00:15:57,623 --> 00:16:00,001
- You know, I can't stay long.
- One drink.

239
00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:02,378
The man's got a harem.

240
00:16:03,254 --> 00:16:04,130
You all know Debra.

241
00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:06,883
- Hi, Debbie. Hi, honey.
- Hi, Coach. Hi, guys.

242
00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:10,887
Diane, this is Debra.
Debra, this is Diane.

243
00:16:11,053 --> 00:16:12,305
- Hi.
- Hi.

244
00:16:12,513 --> 00:16:13,514
Debra.

245
00:16:15,475 --> 00:16:18,478
- What are you drinking?
- A very dry martini.

246
00:16:18,686 --> 00:16:20,271
Oh, hey, that's a very classy order.

247
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:23,316
Diane, we're gonna have
a very dry martini.

248
00:16:24,150 --> 00:16:25,443
Nothing for me.

249
00:16:26,068 --> 00:16:28,070
We just got back
from Symphony Hall.

250
00:16:28,571 --> 00:16:31,532
Heard Mozart's <i>Symphony No. 41.</i>

251
00:16:32,033 --> 00:16:34,035
Sometimes known
as the <i>Jupiter Symphony.</i>

252
00:16:34,535 --> 00:16:35,328
Debra's idea.

253
00:16:36,454 --> 00:16:40,082
Well, I haven't heard a lot
of classical music, but I like it.

254
00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:43,794
What was that comment
you made at intermission?

255
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:46,506
"Give me a cigarette"?

256
00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:52,512
No, not that one. The smart one.
The one about the music.

257
00:16:53,221 --> 00:16:56,224
Oh, yeah. I said it's hard to believe

258
00:16:56,432 --> 00:16:59,519
that all of that music could come out
of one man's head.

259
00:16:59,727 --> 00:17:02,063
- One man's head.
- I heard.

260
00:17:02,230 --> 00:17:03,981
Where else would it come out of?

261
00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:08,736
You know, I read in the program
that Mozart died when he was 35.

262
00:17:09,111 --> 00:17:12,615
Imagine writing all of that music
before you're 35.

263
00:17:12,823 --> 00:17:14,951
Slow down, Debra, you're giving us
too much to think about.

264
00:17:19,997 --> 00:17:22,542
- I have got to be going somewhere.
- Just as well,

265
00:17:22,750 --> 00:17:24,085
our heads are spinning, huh?

266
00:17:25,336 --> 00:17:27,922
Oh, oh, oh, wait, wait, Debra,
you forgot your program.

267
00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:30,299
- Oh, thank you.
- Yeah, I love Mozart too. I--

268
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,262
This program's two years old.

269
00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:36,055
Is it?

270
00:17:37,390 --> 00:17:38,140
Yes.

271
00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:45,606
Well, then, Mozart must have been
37 years old when he died.

272
00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:50,611
I didn't say we came straight
from the concert.

273
00:17:53,155 --> 00:17:56,742
Okay, okay, we went to see
<i>Star Wars</i> again, and I'm glad.

274
00:18:00,538 --> 00:18:01,497
How'd I do?

275
00:18:02,164 --> 00:18:04,792
Well, just-- Thank you.
Thank you very much.

276
00:18:04,959 --> 00:18:05,793
Thanks.

277
00:18:11,966 --> 00:18:13,551
- Don't.
- Fine.

278
00:18:14,260 --> 00:18:15,344
I'm gonna play pool.

279
00:18:23,185 --> 00:18:24,979
Carla...

280
00:18:25,313 --> 00:18:27,398
...you've known Sam a long time.

281
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:30,860
Has he ever had a lasting relationship
with a really intelligent woman?

282
00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:33,237
That's the best I've seen.

283
00:18:34,238 --> 00:18:35,531
What about his ex-wife?

284
00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:38,701
That was his ex-wife.

285
00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,541
I'm gonna go back there
and talk to him.

286
00:18:49,378 --> 00:18:52,381
"Blond Chick Dies
in Billiard Accident."

287
00:18:56,427 --> 00:19:00,389
- Sam?
- Go away. I'm reading Plato.

288
00:19:02,558 --> 00:19:04,810
May I speak with you for a moment?

289
00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:06,646
No.

290
00:19:07,813 --> 00:19:10,274
I came in to cheer you up a little.

291
00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:14,111
Look, I think I know why
you brought Debra here.

292
00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:16,656
You're trying to prove
you date smart women.

293
00:19:16,822 --> 00:19:20,076
No, I brought Debra here for a drink.
This is a bar.

294
00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:23,162
- Oh, come on--
- No, it's a bar. Is this a bar?

295
00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:27,833
Excuse me.

296
00:19:31,379 --> 00:19:33,881
I sense that you're
a little unhappy right now.

297
00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:35,675
Unhappy? I'm not unhappy.

298
00:19:35,841 --> 00:19:38,678
Hey, I'm on top of the world.
What a life I lead.

299
00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:42,848
Tomorrow night, I'm going out
with a girl who wears a pinwheel hat.

300
00:19:44,725 --> 00:19:47,395
Would you stop making jokes
and talk to me?

301
00:19:49,313 --> 00:19:52,650
Okay, I'm all cheered up now.
You can leave. Thanks.

302
00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:56,612
Why are you so upset?

303
00:20:00,157 --> 00:20:03,452
You know, this week I have gone out
with all the women I know.

304
00:20:03,661 --> 00:20:06,372
I mean, all the women
I really enjoyed.

305
00:20:06,580 --> 00:20:10,167
And all of a sudden, all I can
think about is how stupid they are.

306
00:20:10,876 --> 00:20:12,962
I mean, my life isn't fun anymore.

307
00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:15,172
And it's because of you.

308
00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:18,634
Because of me?

309
00:20:18,801 --> 00:20:21,137
Yeah. You're a snob.

310
00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:26,308
- A snob?
- Yeah, that's right.

311
00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:31,230
Well, you're a
rapidly aging adolescent.

312
00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:34,984
Well, I would rather be that
than a snob.

313
00:20:35,192 --> 00:20:39,113
- And I would rather be a snob.
- Well, good, because you are.

314
00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:43,951
Sam, do yourself a favor. Go back
to your tootsies and your rat parts.

315
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:47,496
I'd hate to see the bowling alleys
close on my account.

316
00:20:47,705 --> 00:20:49,290
Hey, hey, wait. Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

317
00:20:49,540 --> 00:20:52,585
Are you saying that I'm too dumb
to date smart women?

318
00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:56,464
I'm saying that it would be
very difficult for you.

319
00:20:56,672 --> 00:21:00,885
A really intelligent woman would see
your line of B.S. a mile away.

320
00:21:01,051 --> 00:21:02,970
You think so, huh?

321
00:21:03,929 --> 00:21:07,266
Yeah, well, you know,
I've never met an intelligent woman

322
00:21:07,475 --> 00:21:08,601
that I'd wanna date.

323
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,855
On behalf of the intelligent women
around the world,

324
00:21:13,022 --> 00:21:14,482
may I just say:

325
00:21:20,946 --> 00:21:23,324
- Well, come on, come on.
- Oh, well, wait, wait, wait.

326
00:21:23,532 --> 00:21:25,367
It all depends what kind
we're talking about here.

327
00:21:25,576 --> 00:21:26,952
- Just the average kind.
- Any kind.

328
00:21:27,161 --> 00:21:28,496
All right. Okay.

329
00:21:28,704 --> 00:21:32,166
You take your average whale's
intestines and stretch them out,

330
00:21:32,374 --> 00:21:35,252
you're looking at three miles
and change.

331
00:21:36,378 --> 00:21:40,508
You win again, Coach.
This man knows his animal kingdom.

332
00:21:43,594 --> 00:21:44,887
Getting late.

333
00:21:46,472 --> 00:21:49,725
Just about time this old cowpoke
moseyed off to the bathroom.

334
00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:01,737
Black Label over,
bloody Mary, shot of vodka.

335
00:22:02,863 --> 00:22:04,114
Hey...

336
00:22:04,824 --> 00:22:06,450
Look, I am sorry.

337
00:22:06,659 --> 00:22:09,078
I said a lot of stupid things
I shouldn't have.

338
00:22:09,328 --> 00:22:10,538
I apologize.

339
00:22:11,247 --> 00:22:12,998
I was kind of upset.

340
00:22:18,212 --> 00:22:20,130
Okay, I'm sorry too.

341
00:22:21,799 --> 00:22:23,425
We both got a little carried away.

342
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:25,553
Especially you.

343
00:22:31,100 --> 00:22:32,226
Well, I'll be darned.

344
00:22:33,936 --> 00:22:37,022
- What?
- Nothing. I just noticed something.

345
00:22:38,399 --> 00:22:40,860
- What?
- Well, I guess I've--

346
00:22:41,026 --> 00:22:43,195
I've never looked into your eyes.

347
00:22:44,405 --> 00:22:45,656
Something wrong with them?

348
00:22:46,532 --> 00:22:47,575
No, I...

349
00:22:48,993 --> 00:22:51,412
...just don't think I've ever
seen eyes that color before.

350
00:22:52,746 --> 00:22:56,125
Matter of fact, I don't think
I've ever seen that color before.

351
00:22:57,710 --> 00:22:59,253
Yes, I have. Yes, I have.

352
00:23:02,047 --> 00:23:03,215
Where?

353
00:23:04,216 --> 00:23:05,593
I was...

354
00:23:05,801 --> 00:23:08,846
I was on a ski weekend up at Stowe.

355
00:23:10,055 --> 00:23:11,724
I was coming in late one day.

356
00:23:12,516 --> 00:23:15,936
Last person off the slope.
The sun had just gone down.

357
00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:20,024
And the sky became
this incredible color.

358
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:22,902
I usually don't notice things like that,

359
00:23:23,068 --> 00:23:26,614
and I found myself kind of
walking around in the cold...

360
00:23:27,740 --> 00:23:29,283
...hoping that it wouldn't change,

361
00:23:30,075 --> 00:23:32,828
wishing that I had somebody there
to share it with me.

362
00:23:33,746 --> 00:23:37,791
Afterwards, I tried to convince myself
that I had imagined that color.

363
00:23:39,084 --> 00:23:40,085
That I hadn't really seen it.

364
00:23:40,252 --> 00:23:43,172
That nothing on this earth
could be that beautiful.

365
00:23:45,007 --> 00:23:46,383
Now I see I was wrong.

366
00:23:52,681 --> 00:23:54,099
Wouldn't work, huh?

367
00:23:57,478 --> 00:23:58,437
What?

368
00:23:59,813 --> 00:24:02,316
An intelligent woman
would see right through that?

369
00:24:08,113 --> 00:24:09,365
In a minute.

370
00:24:10,783 --> 00:24:11,659
Damn.