1
00:00:08,634 --> 00:00:10,928
Oh, hey, Diane,
do me a favor, will you?

2
00:00:11,094 --> 00:00:12,554
Pour Mischa there a real quick beer.

3
00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:15,057
Coming right up, Mischa.

4
00:00:21,813 --> 00:00:23,023
There you go.

5
00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:31,281
Sam, what is he doing with his hand?

6
00:00:32,407 --> 00:00:34,493
He's a cymbals player
for the symphony,

7
00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:37,496
and they're in the middle of a concert.
He's counting out a long rest,

8
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:40,832
so he'll know exactly
when to get back for the big finish.

9
00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:45,254
Fascinating.

10
00:00:45,420 --> 00:00:47,130
Okay, that's 1.25 out of 20.

11
00:00:47,297 --> 00:00:51,760
That's 1.50, 1.75,
2, 3, 4, 5, 10 and 20.

12
00:00:56,473 --> 00:00:58,559
Musicians are very temperamental.

13
00:02:17,846 --> 00:02:20,390
- Afternoon, everybody.
- Norm!

14
00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:22,225
- Norman.
- How's life, Norm?

15
00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:24,061
Not for the squeamish, Coach.

16
00:02:25,896 --> 00:02:27,439
Norm, what's the matter?
You're shaking there

17
00:02:27,606 --> 00:02:29,358
like a meringue in an earthquake.

18
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:31,860
My whole career as an accountant,

19
00:02:32,027 --> 00:02:34,613
I just sat in my cubicle,
kept my mouth shut, right?

20
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:37,366
Today I made the mistake
of volunteering for something.

21
00:02:37,532 --> 00:02:38,450
Oh, what?

22
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:41,578
Every year the firm has
a company party.

23
00:02:41,745 --> 00:02:43,997
- Yeah.
- Guess who's party director this year.

24
00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:46,416
Wait, wait. Let me guess.
Let me guess. I'm good at guessing.

25
00:02:47,209 --> 00:02:48,585
Julius LaRosa.

26
00:02:50,295 --> 00:02:53,006
Warm, Coach. Me.

27
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,258
Gee, I should have taken
more time, huh, Sam?

28
00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:57,260
Probably.

29
00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:00,806
So how come you volunteered, Norm?

30
00:03:00,972 --> 00:03:02,516
Chance to make points
with the big boss.

31
00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:06,603
Last year some nobody named Jensen
threw a luau in the parking lot.

32
00:03:07,312 --> 00:03:10,732
It was a big hit.
You know where that man is today?

33
00:03:10,899 --> 00:03:13,151
Leaning over my shoulder
saying, "Add faster."

34
00:03:15,404 --> 00:03:18,198
Norman, I don't know
what you're so upset about.

35
00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:20,242
Sounds like a great opportunity to me.

36
00:03:20,409 --> 00:03:21,660
That's what I thought.

37
00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,746
After I volunteered,
I realized I never threw a party.

38
00:03:25,497 --> 00:03:26,415
I killed a few.

39
00:03:31,002 --> 00:03:33,714
Hey, what's the big deal, huh?
You want some excitement,

40
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:36,007
you pay a sexy chick
to jump out of a cake.

41
00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:38,677
Or if you wanna save a little money,
you could get Carla to do it.

42
00:03:38,844 --> 00:03:41,221
- Couldn't resist.
- Carla! Carla!

43
00:03:41,888 --> 00:03:43,932
Diane, strippers aren't enough here.

44
00:03:44,099 --> 00:03:46,643
All right, Norm. Will you relax?
Life's too short.

45
00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:50,814
Cliff, you don't understand.
We're talking about 100 accountants.

46
00:03:50,981 --> 00:03:53,525
Their lives are incredibly dull
all week long.

47
00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:54,943
You gotta do something special

48
00:03:55,110 --> 00:03:57,195
to turn those guys on,
wake them up, you know?

49
00:03:57,362 --> 00:04:00,365
Norm, the best party I was ever at
was in a locker room, right?

50
00:04:00,532 --> 00:04:02,576
We're all standing around
in our underwear,

51
00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:04,453
pouring champagne on each other,

52
00:04:04,619 --> 00:04:08,248
guys flinging guys into showers.
It was terrific, Norm.

53
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:11,251
Coach, that was after we'd won
the division championship.

54
00:04:11,418 --> 00:04:13,879
That's right. That's why we were
all in Cleveland.

55
00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:14,963
Right.

56
00:04:17,632 --> 00:04:19,843
Hey, Norm, I got a great idea.

57
00:04:21,136 --> 00:04:23,346
- Have yourself a hot-tub party.
- What?

58
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:25,640
Yeah, it's the latest craze
out there in California.

59
00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:28,226
- You know, your weirdo central.
- Yeah?

60
00:04:28,393 --> 00:04:30,604
Yeah. You get a bunch
of people in a hot tub,

61
00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:32,063
you never can tell
what's gonna happen.

62
00:04:32,230 --> 00:04:36,359
I mean, just today I was delivering
two copies of <i>Star Parade</i> magazine.

63
00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:38,320
Guess who's on the cover in a hot tub.

64
00:04:38,487 --> 00:04:39,863
Julius LaRosa.

65
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,991
No, it was Burt Reynolds, Coach.

66
00:04:43,158 --> 00:04:45,577
Boy, I used to be so good at this game.

67
00:04:45,744 --> 00:04:47,329
I did think of one little icebreaker.

68
00:04:47,496 --> 00:04:50,499
You know, I go through
this year's audits,

69
00:04:50,665 --> 00:04:53,794
find the biggest mistakes
and xerox them, pass them around.

70
00:04:55,253 --> 00:04:57,380
We're talking monster laughs.

71
00:04:59,424 --> 00:05:01,760
You're a maniac, Normie.

72
00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:06,681
Norman, perhaps I can give you
an idea that you could actually use.

73
00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:11,061
I think parties are the most fun
when you can shed

74
00:05:11,228 --> 00:05:14,189
your everyday, mundane identity
and come as someone else.

75
00:05:14,815 --> 00:05:16,983
Back in college, I held a party
where everyone came

76
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,152
as their favorite Elizabethan poet.

77
00:05:19,778 --> 00:05:20,821
I remember...

78
00:05:22,364 --> 00:05:25,200
...it was so great.
I chose Christopher Marlowe

79
00:05:25,367 --> 00:05:27,994
because I was deeply into
<i>Doctor Faustus</i> at the time.

80
00:05:28,578 --> 00:05:33,333
But I still get letters from people
who loved it, Norman. Loved it.

81
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:37,754
Say, didn't we used to have a weekly
Elizabethan Poet Night here?

82
00:05:37,921 --> 00:05:40,549
- Yeah, it started getting too rowdy.
- Oh, yeah, yeah.

83
00:05:41,216 --> 00:05:42,801
Yeah, I remember the night
you were charged

84
00:05:42,968 --> 00:05:45,846
with practicing iambic pentameter
without a license there.

85
00:05:47,973 --> 00:05:52,519
You know, Sam, if I'm to serve both
as a waitress and the butt of jokes,

86
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:54,312
I think I should make more money.

87
00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:57,107
Yeah, what does a good butt
make in this town?

88
00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:05,615
Okay, Norman, in keeping with the spirit
of this establishment and its patrons,

89
00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:09,870
I suggest you get totally down
in the mud and throw a toga party.

90
00:06:10,871 --> 00:06:13,790
Toga party? You mean, like,
where they dress up in sheets?

91
00:06:13,957 --> 00:06:17,085
Oh, I'm sure you'd love it.
It's a stupid fraternity tradition

92
00:06:17,252 --> 00:06:21,506
where a bunch of borderline humans
stand around swilling beer

93
00:06:21,673 --> 00:06:23,466
and vomiting on themselves.

94
00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:26,636
Until the inevitable denouement
when they raise their robes

95
00:06:26,803 --> 00:06:29,472
to reveal the depths
of their personalities.

96
00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:33,226
- Hallelujah, I am saved!
- No!

97
00:06:34,311 --> 00:06:36,271
Yes, sir, I can see it!

98
00:06:36,438 --> 00:06:38,189
This is gonna make
that luau look like a pig roast.

99
00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:40,358
- Easily, easily.
- Sammy, can I use Cheers?

100
00:06:40,525 --> 00:06:42,110
I'll pay you half
what you think it's worth.

101
00:06:42,277 --> 00:06:45,405
- How can I pass that up?
- Come on. I got a lot to do here.

102
00:06:46,281 --> 00:06:48,658
I should just go home
and close myself off

103
00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:50,368
and work out all the details.

104
00:06:50,535 --> 00:06:52,329
- Great. Good luck, Norm.
- No, I can do that in the bathroom.

105
00:07:14,309 --> 00:07:15,226
Sam.

106
00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:20,690
These people aren't dressed
in togas, are they?

107
00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:22,067
No, Coach.

108
00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:24,402
I thought it was supposed to be
a toga party.

109
00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:26,321
- It is.
- Well...

110
00:07:26,488 --> 00:07:29,532
I must be getting my spells again.
I thought I had them licked.

111
00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:31,576
- No, you're all right, Coach.
- You sure?

112
00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:33,787
Yes. You're all right.
These people just...

113
00:07:34,329 --> 00:07:36,539
...haven't gotten into the spirit
of the party yet.

114
00:07:36,706 --> 00:07:38,208
Oh, thanks, Sam.

115
00:07:40,335 --> 00:07:41,294
But here comes Diane.

116
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:43,838
Gang in the back's ready
for another order, huh?

117
00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:46,216
- Not yet.
- It's been an hour and a half.

118
00:07:46,383 --> 00:07:48,468
What are they doing,
watching their ice melt?

119
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:50,428
Actually, Sam, things
are quite peppy back there.

120
00:07:50,595 --> 00:07:52,305
There's one fellow who,
believe it or not,

121
00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:55,058
can recite every area code in the country.

122
00:07:55,225 --> 00:07:57,602
We're talking dazzling
entertainment here.

123
00:07:58,353 --> 00:08:01,773
Sam, can you spring me
for a few minutes? I gotta see this.

124
00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:05,527
Enjoy, Coach.

125
00:08:05,694 --> 00:08:08,613
Listen, if this guy knows
Laramie, Wyoming, I'll croak.

126
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:12,742
Boy, this party stinks.

127
00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:18,498
Well, maybe we should do something
to help pick it up, huh?

128
00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:20,166
I got an idea. Listen...

129
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:23,128
Why don't you go back to my office,
top drawer of my desk,

130
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:26,381
you'll find two tassels and a G-string,
I'll hum "Night Train."

131
00:08:27,298 --> 00:08:29,134
- No, come on, it might work.
- Get out.

132
00:08:31,428 --> 00:08:33,054
Let the games begin!

133
00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:37,058
Holy...

134
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:49,863
Well, you all got the date right,
so I know you can read.

135
00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:53,491
You. How come you're not in a toga?

136
00:08:54,325 --> 00:08:56,703
I was afraid everybody else would
chicken out, and I'd be the only one,

137
00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:58,413
look like a ridiculous fool.

138
00:09:00,123 --> 00:09:01,082
Good point.

139
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:04,544
Jensen, nice suit.

140
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:08,298
Hello there.

141
00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:14,929
Why did I volunteer?
I'm a dead man.

142
00:09:17,599 --> 00:09:20,268
Sammy, you got somebody
lying in state in the back room?

143
00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:25,648
Nobody's moved
for an hour and a half.

144
00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:27,692
Hey, Normie, I like it.

145
00:09:27,859 --> 00:09:30,195
You look like
the Pillsbury Doughmonster.

146
00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:35,116
- How come you're late?
- I had car trouble.

147
00:09:35,283 --> 00:09:37,410
You try flagging down help
dressed like this.

148
00:09:41,790 --> 00:09:44,584
Where...? Where's your wife?
Why isn't she at the party?

149
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:45,835
She didn't hear about it.

150
00:09:49,798 --> 00:09:51,883
This is the worst party yet.

151
00:09:52,050 --> 00:09:54,094
Thanks loads
for the toga idea, Diane.

152
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:58,807
Well, Norman, all you need
is a little icebreaker.

153
00:09:58,973 --> 00:10:00,517
- Yeah?
- Let me help.

154
00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:03,645
Okay, everybody!

155
00:10:03,812 --> 00:10:06,022
How about a round of that
always-enjoyable game,

156
00:10:06,189 --> 00:10:08,608
Charades, huh? I'll start off.

157
00:10:11,861 --> 00:10:12,862
Movie title.

158
00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:15,532
Four words.

159
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:17,826
First word.

160
00:10:23,748 --> 00:10:26,417
<i>"My."</i> Sounds like "eye."

161
00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:28,503
Here, I'll give you the first one
to get you going.

162
00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:31,297
Okay, second word.

163
00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:35,343
What am I doing here?
I'm eating, huh?

164
00:10:35,510 --> 00:10:37,095
Doesn't this look
like eating and drinking?

165
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:38,888
When do we eat and drink?

166
00:10:39,055 --> 00:10:41,141
Dinner. <i>"My Dinner."</i>

167
00:10:41,307 --> 00:10:42,559
Third word.

168
00:10:45,228 --> 00:10:48,565
What is this? It's little, isn't it?
It's a little word.

169
00:10:49,566 --> 00:10:51,693
W, begins with a W,
little word, begins...

170
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:53,653
With. <i>My Dinner with. My...?</i>

171
00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:56,114
<i>My Dinner With Julius LaRosa!</i>

172
00:10:59,242 --> 00:11:00,201
That's it.

173
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:04,998
- Okay, Ogden, Utah.
- 801!

174
00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:09,169
Hold it down, everybody.
It's the phone!

175
00:11:11,462 --> 00:11:13,882
I feel it! I feel that beat.

176
00:11:14,048 --> 00:11:17,594
Get up off your seat and on your feet.
It's limbo time!

177
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:18,928
Yeah!

178
00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,476
Come on, everybody!

179
00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:29,063
Hey, come on, now!

180
00:11:31,107 --> 00:11:34,611
Come on, last year you ate a pig
with your fist! What's going on here?

181
00:11:35,612 --> 00:11:36,946
Come on! Hey!

182
00:11:39,532 --> 00:11:41,159
Pack of nerds.

183
00:11:43,494 --> 00:11:45,705
Norm, Norm, that was
a message for you.

184
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:48,750
Somebody named Ruta
can't make it tonight.

185
00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:52,378
Oh, no. Ruta's the girl I had coming
to entertain the big boss.

186
00:11:54,339 --> 00:11:55,757
This can't be happening.

187
00:11:56,507 --> 00:11:59,594
First I throw the worst party
in the history of mankind.

188
00:11:59,761 --> 00:12:01,471
Now I got no date for the big boss.

189
00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:04,098
You mean, you gotta set
your boss up with a woman?

190
00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:06,601
Yeah, it's one of
the party director's duties.

191
00:12:06,768 --> 00:12:09,270
Why don't you ask
one of the women here?

192
00:12:09,437 --> 00:12:12,357
Or does your boss like live things?

193
00:12:15,526 --> 00:12:17,820
- Carla, do you suppose...?
- Oh, no, no, no, Norm.

194
00:12:17,987 --> 00:12:21,282
Don't look at me. I got four kids,
and I sure ain't looking for any more.

195
00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:24,202
- I didn't say to have sex with the guy.
- That doesn't matter.

196
00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:25,995
I'm what you call a fast breeder.

197
00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,916
A man winks at me,
I'm three months along.

198
00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:34,254
I need a woman!

199
00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:37,340
Does anybody need anything?

200
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,468
Hallelujah!

201
00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:58,069
All right, let me see
if I've got this straight.

202
00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:02,657
You want me to entertain a man
I've never met.

203
00:13:02,824 --> 00:13:05,618
All I'm asking you to do is pour the guy
a few drinks and chat with him.

204
00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,870
You don't have to go home
with him or anything.

205
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:09,872
Although, if you do, I'll drive.

206
00:13:10,832 --> 00:13:12,542
Hey, I'm joking around, Diane. Come on.

207
00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:14,460
Norman, I'm going to walk away from here

208
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:17,380
and pretend that you
never asked me to do this.

209
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:20,341
Hey, Diane, this could work out
for you too, you know.

210
00:13:20,508 --> 00:13:24,220
You might like this guy.
He's intelligent. He's educated.

211
00:13:24,387 --> 00:13:26,097
- He went to Harvard Business School.
- Sam?

212
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:29,559
You know, it's true. I can't believe
that your job depends on

213
00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:31,561
you finding some woman
for this guy.

214
00:13:31,728 --> 00:13:35,356
That's right. What you're doing is
demeaning and dehumanizing,

215
00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:37,066
not just to me, but to yourself.

216
00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:39,527
I get it. You think I'm a kissy, right?

217
00:13:41,112 --> 00:13:42,780
Well, it's easy for you two to talk.

218
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:45,658
Diane's attractive. She's got brains.

219
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:48,786
Sammy, hey, good-looking guy,
a baseball star.

220
00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:50,413
I've got nothing.

221
00:13:50,580 --> 00:13:53,333
My only hope in life is to find
somebody who's got something

222
00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:55,251
- and try to make them like me.
- Norm...

223
00:13:55,418 --> 00:13:58,588
Yes, yes. So long as there are boots
to be licked, apples to be polished

224
00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:01,215
and fannies to be kissed,
I'll be there!

225
00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:06,721
First time I ever saw a man strut
and grovel at the same time.

226
00:14:08,556 --> 00:14:12,393
Hey, you know, Norm is kind of
in a jam here tonight.

227
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:18,149
- Now you want me to do this.
- Well, it wouldn't be so bad, would it?

228
00:14:18,316 --> 00:14:20,151
You are! You're asking me to do this,

229
00:14:20,318 --> 00:14:21,361
- aren't you?
- What's the big deal?

230
00:14:21,527 --> 00:14:23,696
I mean, you sit down,
probably some old guy,

231
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:26,157
you have a couple of drinks,
he'll fall asleep.

232
00:14:26,324 --> 00:14:28,868
- It's the principle.
- Hello, Mr. Sawyer, sir, welcome!

233
00:14:33,539 --> 00:14:35,458
Well, Norman's a friend.

234
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:40,421
I guess I could give the old geezer
a couple minutes of my time.

235
00:14:41,923 --> 00:14:45,218
Sir, we are all terribly honored and
thrilled that you could make it here.

236
00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:47,845
- Yeah, I like your sheet.
- This old thing?

237
00:14:50,264 --> 00:14:52,725
Why don't you just come on down here
and I'll show you a seat.

238
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,394
Why don't you let me do that, Norman?

239
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:55,478
I know the place.

240
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:57,855
I'll never forget this, Diane.

241
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:01,192
Mr. Sawyer, Diane Chambers.
Friend of mine.

242
00:15:01,359 --> 00:15:03,403
- Nice to meet you, Diane.
- Nice to meet you.

243
00:15:04,946 --> 00:15:06,197
Why don't you two sit right here.

244
00:15:06,364 --> 00:15:07,573
You... out.

245
00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:15,289
Well, what would you like to drink?

246
00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:19,293
Scotch rocks.

247
00:15:20,545 --> 00:15:23,339
Barkeep. A little service, please.

248
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:29,762
Mr. Sawyer will have
Scotch rocks and...

249
00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:33,391
- Let's see, what am I in the mood for?
- How about a good beating?

250
00:15:36,644 --> 00:15:38,896
- Perhaps a vermouth cassis.
- Fine.

251
00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,357
If you need anything else,
please just snap your fingers...

252
00:15:41,524 --> 00:15:42,859
...in several places.

253
00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:46,988
Well, I guess working in a bar
makes you grumpy.

254
00:15:48,698 --> 00:15:50,241
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen!

255
00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:52,243
We're Eddie Barnett
and the Eddie Barnetters.

256
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:55,663
Okay, it's request time.
Shout them out.

257
00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:05,882
"Chicago"?

258
00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:08,092
One of Eddie's favorites, "Chicago."

259
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:23,774
- Norm, this band is the worst.
- I don't understand it.

260
00:16:23,941 --> 00:16:25,568
They sounded so good
over the phone.

261
00:16:27,195 --> 00:16:29,197
- So you're an art student, huh?
- Yes.

262
00:16:29,363 --> 00:16:31,240
You know, I really always wanted
to be a painter.

263
00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:36,871
I must tell you, it is so refreshing
to meet someone like you.

264
00:16:37,038 --> 00:16:38,372
- Yeah?
- Yes, someone in business

265
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:39,749
who enjoys the finer things.

266
00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:43,169
- Here you go. One for you.
- Thank you.

267
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:44,921
One for your lady of the evening.

268
00:16:51,928 --> 00:16:53,679
Here's to a sparkling conversationalist.

269
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:55,890
Oh, thank you.

270
00:16:58,184 --> 00:16:59,685
You know, I'd normally ask you to go out

271
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:01,812
and find someplace to talk
through the night,

272
00:17:01,979 --> 00:17:04,982
but I don't think we'd find
anyplace as quiet as this.

273
00:17:09,904 --> 00:17:11,405
There something wrong
with your drink?

274
00:17:11,572 --> 00:17:12,990
- It's watered down.
- Let me take it back.

275
00:17:13,157 --> 00:17:14,700
No, that's all right.
I know the bartender.

276
00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:15,743
- I'll take care of it.
- You sure?

277
00:17:15,910 --> 00:17:17,161
Yes, I'll be right back.

278
00:17:22,458 --> 00:17:24,085
Do you have a problem, Mr. Malone?

279
00:17:24,252 --> 00:17:26,587
Listen, I know you're a light drinker,

280
00:17:26,754 --> 00:17:28,464
and I didn't want you to get
carried away tonight

281
00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:30,216
and do something you might regret.

282
00:17:32,635 --> 00:17:35,555
You're not at all bothered
that I'm spending time with Herb?

283
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:37,306
Herb?

284
00:17:38,724 --> 00:17:41,018
No, no. None of my business, really.

285
00:17:41,602 --> 00:17:44,522
Looks a little seamy,
but seaminess has its place.

286
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,526
Well, a moment ago,
you were encouraging it.

287
00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:50,653
A moment ago,
the guy was 85 years old.

288
00:17:53,030 --> 00:17:54,407
Oh, I see.

289
00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:58,828
An old man is fine, but one whose
kidneys are still functioning is taboo.

290
00:17:58,995 --> 00:18:01,914
Look. Look, look, like I said,
it's none of my business,

291
00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:04,375
but this guy expects you
to be his for the evening.

292
00:18:04,542 --> 00:18:06,210
The whole evening,
know what I mean?

293
00:18:06,377 --> 00:18:11,591
Sam, we are having a harmless
conversation about art.

294
00:18:11,757 --> 00:18:13,342
- Do you know what I think?
- What?

295
00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:16,387
I think you're a little bothered
by the fact that he's so good-looking.

296
00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:19,307
That's what you consider good-looking?

297
00:18:19,473 --> 00:18:21,350
- Well...
- The guy's got padded shoulders,

298
00:18:21,517 --> 00:18:23,185
and I bet that's not even his real lips.

299
00:18:25,563 --> 00:18:27,690
He's gorgeous,
and it's driving you crazy.

300
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:29,483
- No, it's not.
- Yeah, it's killing you

301
00:18:29,650 --> 00:18:32,069
that there's another
attractive man in your bar.

302
00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:34,447
Another rooster in your henhouse.

303
00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:38,701
The day goes so much easier
for me now that we've got

304
00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:40,870
those little Cup-a-Soups
in the office, sir.

305
00:18:41,037 --> 00:18:43,873
If that was your idea, Mr. Sawyer,
you are a genius.

306
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,250
- Norm, how about I buy you a drink?
- Well, thank you.

307
00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:48,294
Why don't you just set sail
for the bar over there

308
00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:51,881
- and have yourself a good time.
- That's wonderful, sir.

309
00:18:52,423 --> 00:18:54,550
Diane, I understand there's
a pool table in the back room.

310
00:18:54,717 --> 00:18:56,260
How about a game?

311
00:18:56,427 --> 00:18:58,888
Okay. I've never played before,

312
00:18:59,055 --> 00:19:01,766
- but why should that stop us, huh?
- Right.

313
00:19:01,932 --> 00:19:05,603
Thank you for that conversation, sir.
I know I'm the better for it.

314
00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:09,148
- Hi there.
- Hello.

315
00:19:11,025 --> 00:19:12,818
That is a good-looking guy.

316
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:15,946
I felt something kick.

317
00:19:26,749 --> 00:19:29,752
Well, now you know why
I never go to these things.

318
00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:32,672
It must be strange getting
that reaction from people, huh?

319
00:19:32,838 --> 00:19:36,258
I like to think it's the money
and position and not me.

320
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:38,552
Oh, I can assure you it's not you.

321
00:19:40,471 --> 00:19:44,475
I think Sawyer likes Diane.
I'm on my way, big guy.

322
00:19:44,642 --> 00:19:46,560
Norm, you know,
you're really sickening tonight.

323
00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:49,021
Yeah, I know, Sam.

324
00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:51,816
I'm not proud of myself,
but, then, I never am.

325
00:19:58,698 --> 00:19:59,573
Yeah.

326
00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:02,952
Well, Simon Says is my game.

327
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:04,745
- Yeah.
- I'm great at that.

328
00:20:04,912 --> 00:20:09,041
Well, maybe I can help you out here.
I can teach you in a couple of minutes.

329
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:10,835
- Oh, all right.
- Why don't you just

330
00:20:11,001 --> 00:20:14,171
- put your left hand down like that.
- Yeah.

331
00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:16,841
And grab the end
with your other hand.

332
00:20:17,007 --> 00:20:20,428
- I'm not in the way here, am I?
- Diane, you smell wonderful. What is it?

333
00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,346
Thank you. Dandruff shampoo.

334
00:20:26,016 --> 00:20:27,977
- I like it.
- I don't flake for hours.

335
00:20:29,437 --> 00:20:32,356
- Herb, wait a minute. No.
- Diane, you're beautiful.

336
00:20:32,523 --> 00:20:35,943
Well, you know, I don't really believe
in mauling on the first date.

337
00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:38,362
I didn't come down
to hear the band.

338
00:20:38,529 --> 00:20:40,531
I thought we were having
a nice conversation.

339
00:20:40,698 --> 00:20:43,284
- We were. That part's over.
- So how is everything back here?

340
00:20:43,451 --> 00:20:44,410
Whoops!

341
00:20:45,202 --> 00:20:47,496
- Norman!
- He'll stop in a minute, Diane.

342
00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:49,749
- No, really, Norman, it's...
- Mr. Sawyer...

343
00:20:49,915 --> 00:20:51,542
- Get lost, Norm!
- Fine, sir.

344
00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:54,670
- Look, this is not my idea of...
- Oh, come on, Diane.

345
00:20:54,837 --> 00:20:56,380
- No! Wait a minute!
- Mr. Sawyer...

346
00:20:56,547 --> 00:20:59,341
- I told you to leave.
- Mr. Sawyer, get off!

347
00:20:59,508 --> 00:21:02,344
- Norm, this is a big mistake.
- I'm sorry, sir. I know. I'm sorry.

348
00:21:02,511 --> 00:21:04,263
Nice cologne, sir.
Excellent cologne.

349
00:21:04,430 --> 00:21:07,683
You're crazy! You set me up
with this girl, and then you do this?

350
00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:11,937
There is no room in my company
for unstable people.

351
00:21:12,104 --> 00:21:14,148
You clean out your desk tonight!
You're fired!

352
00:21:15,357 --> 00:21:16,442
Yeah, I figured.

353
00:21:17,485 --> 00:21:20,571
Norman, I'm...
I'm real sorry you lost your job.

354
00:21:20,738 --> 00:21:22,656
That's exactly what
I was trying to avoid.

355
00:21:22,823 --> 00:21:24,116
That's all right.

356
00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:27,411
What was that all about?
Your boss just stormed out of here.

357
00:21:27,578 --> 00:21:29,580
- He's not my boss anymore.
- What?

358
00:21:29,747 --> 00:21:32,708
He was all over Diane.
I had to get rough with him.

359
00:21:33,751 --> 00:21:34,877
I want a beer.

360
00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:40,257
- You okay?
- Yes.

361
00:21:42,009 --> 00:21:43,928
Well, go ahead, gloat.

362
00:21:45,054 --> 00:21:47,056
Listen, believe it or not, I'm...

363
00:21:47,765 --> 00:21:50,518
I'm really sorry this happened.
I know you must be feeling...

364
00:21:51,477 --> 00:21:53,270
- ...hurt and angry right now.
- No.

365
00:21:53,979 --> 00:21:55,898
No, I'm not feeling hurt and angry.

366
00:21:56,565 --> 00:21:58,067
I brought this on myself.

367
00:21:59,401 --> 00:22:01,946
- Actually, I'm feeling kind of...
- Cheap?

368
00:22:05,324 --> 00:22:07,952
All right, yes. I feel cheap.

369
00:22:09,411 --> 00:22:12,873
I saw an attractive person
with a little glamour,

370
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:16,126
and I wanted to meet him so badly
that I pushed everything aside

371
00:22:16,293 --> 00:22:17,670
and threw myself at him,

372
00:22:18,796 --> 00:22:21,340
totally sacrificing my dignity
and my pride.

373
00:22:22,132 --> 00:22:24,218
What's wrong with that?
I do that all the time.

374
00:22:28,639 --> 00:22:32,101
For one terrible moment,
I actually saw myself through his eyes.

375
00:22:33,227 --> 00:22:34,395
I saw nothing...

376
00:22:35,563 --> 00:22:36,981
...but a cheap harlot.

377
00:22:37,982 --> 00:22:41,318
Come on, we all know
that you'd starve to death

378
00:22:41,485 --> 00:22:43,445
before you made a living
with your body.

379
00:22:47,116 --> 00:22:49,368
- Thanks, Sam.
- You're welcome, Diane.

380
00:22:54,498 --> 00:22:55,958
So he fired you, huh, Norm?

381
00:22:57,585 --> 00:22:58,752
He fired me, Coach.

382
00:23:00,212 --> 00:23:01,213
You know something?

383
00:23:02,715 --> 00:23:04,008
I may not have a job.

384
00:23:05,175 --> 00:23:06,302
I may not have a future.

385
00:23:07,428 --> 00:23:10,848
I may not have anything
except this sheet on my back...

386
00:23:12,474 --> 00:23:13,434
...but you know something?

387
00:23:14,602 --> 00:23:15,978
I feel terrible.

388
00:23:17,438 --> 00:23:19,148
Gee, I'm sorry, Norm.

389
00:23:20,065 --> 00:23:20,983
Got it.

390
00:23:22,067 --> 00:23:24,653
Hey, did you really hit the boss?

391
00:23:24,820 --> 00:23:27,031
No, I just shoved him
around a little bit.

392
00:23:27,197 --> 00:23:31,243
Hey, everybody, it's true!
Norman just punched out the boss!

393
00:23:31,994 --> 00:23:34,496
- I just pushed him around.
- Way to go, Peterson.

394
00:23:35,497 --> 00:23:37,207
All right, Norman!

395
00:23:38,876 --> 00:23:40,836
Norman, our hero!

396
00:23:41,545 --> 00:23:43,339
- Norman!
- Norman!