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Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
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Okay, folks,
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just to help you
pass the time away
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while you're waiting
for your table upstairs,
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I'm gonna show you a little trick
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that never fails to leave people
with their mouths wide open.
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I'm gonna guess your correct age
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by asking you
three simple questions, okay?
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- Sounds like fun.
- Good.
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Okay, first question.
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What year were you born?
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You gotta be kidding.
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Please, bear with me, will you?
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Nineteen forty-nine.
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Nineteen forty-nine, okay.
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Second question.
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How much you weigh?
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About 185 pounds.
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One hundred
and eighty-five pounds.
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Okay, third and last question.
What do you do for a living?
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I'm a carpet salesman.
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Carpet salesman. All right.
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Okay, I should have an answer for you
right after dinner, huh?
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After dinner?
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Yeah, I didn't realize
I had to carry a number.
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Four, six and seven...
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- Afternoon, everybody.
- Norm!
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Hey, Normie, what would you like?
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I don't know.
You got anything pale and cold?
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Yeah, but it's Diane's day off.
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I'll have a beer then, I guess.
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You're looking a little glum there,
buddy. You got a problem?
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Yeah, new boss
just chewed me out.
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Says I lack enthusiasm.
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Well, is that true?
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I don't know.
Maybe, I guess, who cares?
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Well, here it is, Dr. Ludlow.
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Remember, it was Diane's idea
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to expose you to
Boston's seamy underbelly.
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Oh, Frasier, come on.
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Dr. Ludlow will enjoy
a quaint little Boston pub.
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I wonder who the guy is
with Frasier and Diane.
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Talent scout for a geek show.
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Well, I do wish that I'd worn
a heavier overcoat.
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I had no idea it would be
so chilly up here.
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Yes, I apologize for that.
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You're apologizing for the weather?
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Well, yes, and also the fact
that I've had this toasty garment
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while you've been chilled. Why don't
you wear it on the way home?
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Well, we're not exactly
the same size, Frasier.
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- Right, I'm sorry.
- And you don't need
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- to keep apologizing!
- Oh, that's all right, sir, I don't mind.
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Frasier.
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I'm sorry. It's just that I turn to jelly
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when I'm in the presence
of my mentor, Dr. Bennett Ludlow.
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Frasier, this attitude of yours
was perfectly all right
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when you were in my graduate program,
but we are peers now.
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Did you hear that, Diane? Peers.
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Ludlow, get us some brandies.
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No, no, I'm just kidding.
I'll get them.
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Diane, could you give me a hand?
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Oh, certainly. Excuse me.
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You noticed, didn't you?
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Of course I noticed.
What are we going to do about it?
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Well, the only thing we can do,
ignore it.
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Ignore it? That's like telling me
to ignore your fly being open.
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Yes, very good point.
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It isn't, is it?
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What seems to be
the problem here, folks?
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Well, Sam, my colleague
has dropped a crumb during dinner,
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and in the intervening hours
it has become encrusted on his tie.
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So what? You can take
Norm's tie here,
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put it in a kettle and make soup.
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Incidentally, it's a little-known fact
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that the tie was invented
in ancient times to be used as a bib.
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You know, wipe your chin.
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You mean they're thinking
of changing that?
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Why don't you just tell the guy
that he's got a spot?
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Gee, that's an idea.
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Why didn't we just come to Sam
in the first place?
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Sam, you just don't say,
"There's a spot on your tie"
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to a man the stature
of Dr. Bennett Ludlow.
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The Bennett Ludlow?
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You've heard of him, Coach?
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No.
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Coach, he's only one
of the true giants of psychiatry.
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Author, innovator, educator,
and I'm not ashamed to say,
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my idol and inspiration.
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All right, you lean over, you pretend
you're admiring his tie tack,
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and you just nibble the morsel off
real quick.
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Who's the wiser?
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Sam is right. We have to tell him.
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Of course you're right.
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Oh, Sam, may we have
three brandies, please?
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I guess I'm the one
who should tell him.
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After all, I'm the one
who suggested beef Wellington.
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Beef Wellington, you say?
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Where's that tie? Show me.
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I just have to find a way to tell him
in a subtle and tactful way
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that will allow him
to preserve his dignity.
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Hey, Pigpen.
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What's that thing?
What, are you trying to catch pigeons?
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Thank you very much.
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Don't mention it. I like a man
who wears his dinner with pride.
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Here we are.
Sir, in spite of the fact
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that it may cause you
some personal embarrassment,
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I have to tell you, you have a spot...
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...in my heart.
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Always have, always will.
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Thank you.
Thank you very much, Frasier,
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but if you'll excuse me,
I've got a telephone call to make.
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Believe me, I am not the sort of man
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who approaches young,
unfamiliar ladies in a bar
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and tries to become more familiar
by the use of some smooth line.
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Your secret is safe with me.
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Pardon me.
Pardon me for saying this,
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but there is something about you
that is so strikingly attractive.
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While you're staring
at my zoomers,
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let's see if we can figure out
what that is.
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What would it take
to get your telephone number?
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A phone book.
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Would you tell me your name,
or shall I just check in the yellow pages
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under "Hot Babe"?
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The name is Carla Tortelli,
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and I'm starting to like you.
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- Oh, say, Norm?
- Yes, Cliff?
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You seem to have a spot
there on your tie.
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So I do, so I do. Thank you,
Cliff ie, for pointing that out.
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You know, if more people
were as conscientious as you are,
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I think we could wipe out
social embarrassment in our time.
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Well, don't thank me, Norm.
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Periodic tie checks are the duty
of every American citizen.
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- Did he look at his tie?
- No.
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So much for subtlety.
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All right, you just start
a fire for diversion.
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I'll hose him down.
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Boy, am I exhausted.
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What, not much sleep, huh?
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No, Normie, I slept like a baby.
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It's just that I dreamed
I had insomnia all night.
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You know, someday
that man's head is gonna open up,
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and a prize will pop out.
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Hi, everybody.
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Oh, hey, Carla,
I got some flowers here for you.
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Oh, for me?
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Yeah, very cute, Carla.
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You've gotten flowers every day
for the last two weeks.
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Yeah, I guess I ought to be
feeling a little guilty.
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I mean, I'm getting
all these flowers,
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and there are bees
going to bed hungry.
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Yeah, we're kind of curious here.
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Who's your secret admirer?
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None of your damn business.
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Thank you, Carla.
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Sam.
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- So, what did she say?
- "None of your damn business."
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Well, excuse me for living.
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What if I said that to you
when you asked me to
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show you how to throw
a knuckle ball?
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You did.
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Oh, so we're even.
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Oh, Frasier, you're early.
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Is something wrong?
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Well, of course
something's wrong.
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Dr. Ludlow cancelled out on us again.
Surprise, surprise.
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What excuse did he give this time?
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- Something came up.
- Something came up.
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Something's been coming up
every night for the last two months.
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Well, Frasier,
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maybe we just have to admit
that he doesn't want to see us socially.
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Well, yes, I guess we've been
trying too hard. We've been too eager.
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Sam, can I get a beer
or something, please?
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Especially that first night when
we made such buffoons of ourselves.
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"We," Frasier?
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All right, you.
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Me?
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Yes. The way you fawned over him
was nothing less than criminal.
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If you had taken off your clothes
and writhed on the floor in front of him,
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it would have been
a refreshing note of subtlety.
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No wonder the man's
been shunning us.
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00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:18,827
Frasier, you were so obsequious,
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if he had asked you to cluck
like a chicken and lay an egg,
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you would have squatted
and asked, "What color?"
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Well, he didn't ask me to,
so it's a moot point at best, Diane.
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I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
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Hey, Diane, while I'm thinking about it,
I need tonight off.
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Could you switch with me?
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- Well...
- Why not?
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There's nothing going on
in our lives.
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That'll be fine, Carla.
You're in luck again.
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It seems every time
you want to trade nights with me,
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my plans get cancelled.
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Yeah, go figure.
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00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:51,818
Hey, Diane.
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00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,321
You know, I've been thinking.
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Have you?
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The oddsmakers
take a beating again.
198
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,873
No, listen, listen.
Is it possible that your--?
199
00:11:05,039 --> 00:11:07,458
This Ludlow fella hasn't been
seeing the two of you,
200
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:09,919
because he's been spending
all his time with Carla?
201
00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:11,462
Yes, Sam.
202
00:11:11,629 --> 00:11:14,340
Either that, or he had to
finish his paper route on Mars.
203
00:11:17,385 --> 00:11:19,971
I'm sorry, Sam, that you had to feel
the sting of my wit,
204
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,139
but it's a ludicrous question.
205
00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:22,974
Now, wait a minute,
wait a minute.
206
00:11:23,141 --> 00:11:25,435
There are two mysteries
going on here.
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00:11:25,602 --> 00:11:29,439
First, Carla's been seeing
this obviously very classy guy,
208
00:11:29,606 --> 00:11:32,775
and second, your pal's been avoiding
the two of you like the plague.
209
00:11:33,610 --> 00:11:36,404
Of course, that's the lesser
of the two mysteries.
210
00:11:41,075 --> 00:11:43,494
Sam, you're talking about
one of the most distinguished
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00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:45,747
and accomplished
men of letters I know
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00:11:45,914 --> 00:11:47,540
dating a common barmaid.
213
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:50,210
- You're dating a barmaid.
- She wasn't a barmaid when I met her.
214
00:11:50,376 --> 00:11:53,004
Oh, that's right, that's right,
she was a lunatic.
215
00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:57,467
No, it's true, Coach.
216
00:11:57,926 --> 00:12:01,179
See, many scientists believe
that the little finger,
217
00:12:01,346 --> 00:12:02,972
that's the pinkie in the legerdemain,
218
00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:05,767
will one day, like the tail, disappear.
219
00:12:05,934 --> 00:12:07,227
You know, because it serves
no useful purpose.
220
00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:11,439
Well, people couldn't go swimming
without their little finger.
221
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:15,443
Why do you need a little finger
to swim, Coach?
222
00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:18,655
When you come out of the water,
you can't do this...
223
00:12:20,448 --> 00:12:21,491
I stand corrected.
224
00:12:22,825 --> 00:12:25,536
Sam, may I speak to you
for a moment?
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00:12:25,703 --> 00:12:28,289
Okay, okay, a cute lunatic. All right?
226
00:12:30,041 --> 00:12:33,294
Frasier is in a very fragile
state of mind.
227
00:12:34,629 --> 00:12:36,172
Your asinine theories,
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00:12:36,339 --> 00:12:40,260
while suitable fodder
for inane bar conversation,
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00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,762
do nothing to ease his fit of pique.
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00:12:42,929 --> 00:12:45,807
Wait a minute here.
The one word I understood in that
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00:12:45,974 --> 00:12:47,809
I don't exactly care for.
232
00:12:49,143 --> 00:12:50,353
My theory's not asinine.
233
00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:53,106
You're right. It's a lot worse.
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00:12:53,898 --> 00:12:56,067
Think of the two of them together.
235
00:12:56,234 --> 00:12:58,319
Bennett Ludlow and Carla?
236
00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,113
It's harebrained.
237
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,824
Just imagine it.
238
00:13:02,991 --> 00:13:05,201
Well, you don't have to imagine it.
There it is now. Have you ever seen--?
239
00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:08,538
No, I guess I haven't.
240
00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:10,164
Diane, what's--?
241
00:13:17,380 --> 00:13:19,465
You know, Benny here
may look like a stiff,
242
00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:21,551
but he's really out for a good time.
243
00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:27,473
I was drawn to Carla
right from the start.
244
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:31,811
Why, there's something so sensual,
something so earthy about her.
245
00:13:31,978 --> 00:13:34,355
By the way, didn't any of you
suspect anything?
246
00:13:34,522 --> 00:13:36,858
No, no, I think you would've
had to be a real brain
247
00:13:37,025 --> 00:13:38,860
to figure this one out,
don't you think, Frasier?
248
00:13:40,695 --> 00:13:43,573
Yeah, how come you kept
this relationship such a secret, huh?
249
00:13:43,740 --> 00:13:46,659
Well, that's the way me
and Big Ben wanted it.
250
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:49,912
Our backgrounds are a little different,
which is a slight problem.
251
00:13:50,079 --> 00:13:53,333
I mean, word starts getting around
you're seeing a guy
252
00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:55,752
who tucks his T-shirt
in his undershorts
253
00:13:55,918 --> 00:13:58,254
and your reputation is shot to hell.
254
00:13:59,589 --> 00:14:02,258
And I had similar reasons
to be discreet.
255
00:14:02,425 --> 00:14:05,303
Yeah, well,
cat's out of the bag now, huh?
256
00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:08,848
Well, excuse me, Benny,
I have to go see my customers.
257
00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:11,309
Well, I think this
calls for somebody
258
00:14:11,476 --> 00:14:13,853
- to buy the house a round of drinks.
- Oh, well, I'll do that.
259
00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:16,105
Oh, hey, you beat me to it.
I get the next one.
260
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:20,151
Diane. Excuse me.
261
00:14:22,111 --> 00:14:25,031
Now that I'm gonna be
running in egghead circles,
262
00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:28,534
looks like you and I are gonna be
bumping into each other at parties.
263
00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:31,287
You with your boyfriend
and me with my boyfriend.
264
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:33,247
His hero.
265
00:14:35,750 --> 00:14:38,544
Okay, I think
I've come to terms with this.
266
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:41,130
Dr. Ludlow...
267
00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:43,925
...you came here
more or less on vacation.
268
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:46,302
You've had your walk
on the wild side.
269
00:14:47,637 --> 00:14:50,306
Now you can return
to your proper sphere,
270
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:52,809
refreshed and a better man for it.
271
00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:56,145
Well, frankly, Frasier,
it's a bit more complicated than that.
272
00:14:56,604 --> 00:14:58,648
I'm going to take
a short trip out of town,
273
00:14:58,815 --> 00:15:03,736
and when I come back, I think I'm
going to ask Ms. Tortelli to marry me.
274
00:15:04,153 --> 00:15:05,613
How wonderful.
275
00:15:15,123 --> 00:15:16,666
Damn it, Sam, where is she?
276
00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:19,001
Dr. Ludlow, I don't know.
She's almost never late.
277
00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:21,170
- Coach, did Carla call?
- Yeah, she did.
278
00:15:21,337 --> 00:15:24,048
- Well, what did she say?
- None of your damn business.
279
00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:28,511
How's your knuckle ball?
280
00:15:29,679 --> 00:15:31,931
Come on, Coach, we've been
over this again and again.
281
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:33,307
Give me a break, will you?
282
00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:38,479
Dr. Ludlow,
283
00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:42,275
we're all so happy that Carla's
getting the first break of her life.
284
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,861
- Hear, hear, huh?
- Thank you. Thank you.
285
00:15:45,027 --> 00:15:48,197
All this talk about romance
gives me a warm spot right here.
286
00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:50,450
- Yeah.
- Or was it that meal
287
00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:52,118
I had at the Hungry Heifer?
288
00:15:53,077 --> 00:15:56,289
Yes, yes, yes. I went back
for their special chicken dinner.
289
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:58,374
- What was it?
- A bowl of pellets
290
00:15:58,541 --> 00:15:59,667
and a handful of grain.
291
00:16:01,586 --> 00:16:02,712
Well, here she is.
292
00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:08,551
- What's going on?
- Dr. Ludlow has something
293
00:16:08,718 --> 00:16:09,844
he wants to talk to you about, Carla.
294
00:16:18,561 --> 00:16:21,439
Well, of course, I had not expected
this to be a spectator sport.
295
00:16:21,606 --> 00:16:23,399
Perhaps you'd like
to step over here?
296
00:16:31,532 --> 00:16:34,202
Benny, is this what I think it is?
297
00:16:34,368 --> 00:16:37,830
Yes, Carla, I want you to marry me.
298
00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:41,667
Wow, what a day.
299
00:16:42,877 --> 00:16:43,794
Well, will you?
300
00:16:47,048 --> 00:16:48,382
I guess I'd be crazy to say no.
301
00:16:48,549 --> 00:16:50,885
Champagne, please, for everybody.
302
00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:52,887
All right!
303
00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:58,434
- Way to go, doc.
- That's just great, doc.
304
00:16:58,601 --> 00:17:00,353
- Thank you, thank you.
- Congratulations.
305
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:01,395
It happened right here.
306
00:17:03,231 --> 00:17:05,191
- Congratulations, doc.
- Thank you. Thank you.
307
00:17:05,358 --> 00:17:07,026
- Champagne for everybody.
- Coming up. Coming up.
308
00:17:07,610 --> 00:17:08,736
That is just...
309
00:17:10,112 --> 00:17:12,031
- Come on, pay this window.
- Gentlemen.
310
00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:16,661
Carla?
311
00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:20,331
I couldn't help noticing
you're not exactly leaping for joy.
312
00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:25,920
Bennett Ludlow
is a wonderful catch.
313
00:17:26,087 --> 00:17:27,129
Yeah, well...
314
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:29,882
...there's some things
he doesn't know about me.
315
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:33,052
Well, a little mystery
is good for a marriage.
316
00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:35,304
What haven't you told him?
317
00:17:36,597 --> 00:17:39,809
Well, I haven't been
completely honest about my kids.
318
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:41,894
What haven't you told him
about your kids?
319
00:17:43,145 --> 00:17:44,188
That they live.
320
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:48,401
He doesn't know you have children?
321
00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:52,780
Carla, I think you'd better tell him.
He's going to wonder
322
00:17:52,947 --> 00:17:55,116
who those little people are
running around your place.
323
00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:57,910
I was hoping
he'd be too polite to ask.
324
00:17:59,662 --> 00:18:01,080
Look, I didn't want to scare him off.
325
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:03,833
Well, I think it's only fair
326
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:06,210
that you tell him immediately
you have five children.
327
00:18:06,377 --> 00:18:07,295
Six.
328
00:18:07,461 --> 00:18:10,298
Okay, six, but don't wait. if you--
329
00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:11,841
- I thought it was five.
- It was.
330
00:18:12,008 --> 00:18:14,385
I just came from the doctor's.
331
00:18:18,222 --> 00:18:20,224
Oh, Carla.
332
00:18:20,391 --> 00:18:24,061
When you were in high school
and you took hygiene...
333
00:18:26,439 --> 00:18:29,108
...did you cut
the how-not-to lecture?
334
00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:31,777
I had to. I was pregnant.
335
00:18:32,695 --> 00:18:35,573
I tell you, I'm the most fertile woman
that ever lived.
336
00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:39,327
For me there's only one absolutely
foolproof method of birth control,
337
00:18:39,493 --> 00:18:41,370
and it makes me
sick to my stomach.
338
00:18:41,537 --> 00:18:43,456
- What's that?
- Saying no.
339
00:18:45,082 --> 00:18:46,667
Carla, are you all right?
340
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:50,796
Well, I'll just go celebrate
with the others.
341
00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:52,757
We're like a big family
here at Cheers.
342
00:18:52,923 --> 00:18:55,009
You know what they say
about a big family. More to love.
343
00:18:55,509 --> 00:18:58,054
I always say,
if you want to be in a big fam--
344
00:18:58,220 --> 00:18:59,805
- Beat it.
- Bye.
345
00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:07,146
Carla, my proposal was not exactly met
with the enthusiasm that I expected,
346
00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:10,983
and it suddenly occurred to me
that I never heard the word "yes."
347
00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:13,611
Yeah, I know.
348
00:19:14,862 --> 00:19:17,531
Look, Benny, I gotta tell you
some things about myself.
349
00:19:17,740 --> 00:19:18,783
Would you sit down for a minute?
350
00:19:18,949 --> 00:19:22,536
- Oh, this sounds serious.
- It is. It is.
351
00:19:26,874 --> 00:19:28,626
Have you seen The Brady Bunch?
352
00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:33,297
Yes, I think so.
353
00:19:33,464 --> 00:19:35,716
Well, picture them with knives.
354
00:19:39,762 --> 00:19:40,846
I don't understand.
355
00:19:42,890 --> 00:19:44,183
I have five kids.
356
00:19:46,477 --> 00:19:47,269
Five?
357
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:50,815
Well, five and counting.
358
00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:53,526
You're gonna be a daddy.
359
00:19:57,321 --> 00:19:59,281
This is quite a day.
360
00:20:00,408 --> 00:20:03,411
You now have my permission
to withdraw your proposal.
361
00:20:03,577 --> 00:20:05,871
Carla, do you want me
to withdraw my proposal?
362
00:20:07,540 --> 00:20:09,250
Well, I want you to do
what you wanna do.
363
00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:15,297
I want you to marry me.
364
00:20:17,425 --> 00:20:18,426
You're kidding.
365
00:20:20,678 --> 00:20:22,138
Wow, what class.
366
00:20:24,348 --> 00:20:26,434
I still haven't heard the word "yes."
367
00:20:29,019 --> 00:20:30,062
I know.
368
00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:32,815
Why do you think that is?
369
00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:37,903
Well, I think that if you look
into your feelings, you'll know.
370
00:20:39,363 --> 00:20:40,364
Oh, yeah?
371
00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:48,164
Yeah.
372
00:20:49,415 --> 00:20:51,584
Yeah, I think I do.
373
00:20:54,295 --> 00:20:55,588
I'm in love with someone else.
374
00:20:57,256 --> 00:20:58,257
Who is it, Carla?
375
00:20:59,842 --> 00:21:01,093
I don't know his name.
376
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:02,928
I never even met him yet,
377
00:21:03,095 --> 00:21:06,640
but I've had this really
clear picture of him in my mind
378
00:21:06,807 --> 00:21:08,309
for what seems like forever.
379
00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:11,520
But he is gonna walk
into this bar one night.
380
00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:15,649
Well, not walk, really,
more like swagger.
381
00:21:15,816 --> 00:21:18,194
You know, confident but not cocky.
382
00:21:20,362 --> 00:21:23,407
He's okay-looking,
but he's no pretty boy.
383
00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:26,535
He's a swell dresser.
384
00:21:27,787 --> 00:21:31,957
He's got on this
burgundy leather jacket.
385
00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:35,669
He's got cherry
lifesavers in one pocket
386
00:21:36,378 --> 00:21:38,130
and a pack of Camels in the other.
387
00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:40,800
He's trying to quit them both,
but he can't.
388
00:21:42,802 --> 00:21:43,677
His nose...
389
00:21:45,262 --> 00:21:47,348
...is broken in all the right places.
390
00:21:48,516 --> 00:21:51,811
And he's got this scar on his chin
that he won't talk about.
391
00:21:52,770 --> 00:21:54,772
He cracks his knuckles all the time.
392
00:21:54,939 --> 00:21:57,024
Drives me up a wall,
but what are you gonna do?
393
00:21:59,151 --> 00:22:00,402
Doesn't talk much.
394
00:22:01,821 --> 00:22:02,947
Doesn't have to.
395
00:22:03,989 --> 00:22:05,241
He falls for me.
396
00:22:05,658 --> 00:22:06,826
Hard.
397
00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:09,036
I hurt him a few times.
398
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:10,913
He gets over it.
399
00:22:12,206 --> 00:22:13,332
We get married.
400
00:22:18,963 --> 00:22:23,300
So you see, it'd be a little messy
401
00:22:23,884 --> 00:22:25,970
if I was already married
when he got here.
402
00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:30,432
You know, Carla, I sort of
have a dream girl myself.
403
00:22:33,477 --> 00:22:35,312
Oh, well, tell me about her.
404
00:22:35,646 --> 00:22:40,609
Well, she's a spunky, hearty,
curly-haired little spitfire
405
00:22:40,776 --> 00:22:43,445
who doesn't know
what's really good for her.
406
00:22:48,367 --> 00:22:49,785
I hope you find her someday.
407
00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:52,454
Me too.
408
00:22:55,583 --> 00:22:59,128
By the way, I intend to take care
of that child financially.
409
00:22:59,295 --> 00:23:01,797
You bet your buns you will,
Benny, baby.
410
00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:25,821
- Are you okay?
- Hey, would you knock it off?
411
00:23:29,033 --> 00:23:32,411
Okay, okay, you're all
gonna know eventually,
412
00:23:32,578 --> 00:23:34,288
so you might as well know now.
413
00:23:35,289 --> 00:23:38,000
I turned Benny down,
and I'm pregnant again.
414
00:23:39,001 --> 00:23:40,461
So in case your math is bad,
415
00:23:40,628 --> 00:23:44,048
that makes six,
count them, six kids
416
00:23:44,214 --> 00:23:46,967
for an unmarried woman.
I don't want your sappy looks.
417
00:23:47,134 --> 00:23:49,136
I don't want your charity.
I don't want your sympathy.
418
00:23:49,303 --> 00:23:51,889
As a matter of fact, I don't even
want to talk about this anymore.
419
00:23:52,056 --> 00:23:55,100
I just want to be left alone
to live my life. Got it?
420
00:23:55,267 --> 00:23:56,477
Got it.
421
00:24:08,781 --> 00:24:11,450
What are you people
made of, stone?