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Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
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This never gets old.
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Dr. Crane, can you
help me with something?
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Of course, Woody.
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You know, yesterday
was mine and Kelly's
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third anniversary
of going steady,
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00:02:02,039 --> 00:02:04,916
and I gave her
a dinky key chain,
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00:02:05,083 --> 00:02:08,503
so she goes and gives me
this $300 camera.
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So my problem is--
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Say no more
about it, Woody.
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If I were you,
I wouldn't let Kelly's fine present
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cause you any guilt.
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I mean, after all,
she comes from
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a very privileged background,
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while you're an unsophisticated
working man
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with nary two dimes to rub together.
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You know, these kinds of relationships
rarely make it through a third year.
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Actually, I just wanted to know
how to work the automatic flash.
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Now I just want
to go someplace and cry.
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Frasier,
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I've got to run.
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I'm having my photograph taken
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for a new ID badge at the lab.
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Are you going to get
your hair done for that?
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Why on earth should I?
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Well, at least get the tension
on that bun checked.
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I mean, if that baby goes,
we're all dead.
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That hardly seems just,
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coming from a woman
whose hair has never seen
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a greasy pot
it couldn't scrub clean.
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- My turn.
- I'm out of here.
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Now, now. Girls, girls...
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There's no reason
to insult each other,
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no matter how on the nose
either of you might be.
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00:03:20,158 --> 00:03:21,535
Frasier,
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do you think I should
change my hair?
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You're asking me?
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Just a second, dear.
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Uh-oh.
I'm in big trouble.
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If I tell her to change,
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she'll assume that I'm disappointed
with the way she looks.
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On the other hand,
if I say it's fine as it is,
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she'll think I don't care.
You know, Lilith,
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you should do with those
raven tresses
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whatever pleases you,
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because, my angel, if you're happy,
I'm happy.
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- You're chicken.
- But happy.
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For heaven's sake,
take a stand.
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Just a second, dear.
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She's going to the mat
on this one.
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Why don't you just tell her
to get her hair changed.
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Perhaps you're right.
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You know, she probably wants
to change herself in some way,
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but doesn't have
the confidence to just let go.
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Lilith, I think
you should restyle.
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You know, tell the truth,
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there is a part of me
that would like to see
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a little change
in your appearance.
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Why?
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Because you've secretly hated
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the way I've looked
all these years,
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and haven't had
the guts to tell me?
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Just a second, dear.
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Taxi!
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That's exactly why
I never got married.
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Oh, is that why, Cliff?
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Yeah, that's why.
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Morning, everybody.
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00:04:43,742 --> 00:04:45,869
- Norm!
- Hey, what's going on, Normie?
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It's my birthday, Sammy.
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Give me a beer,
stick a candle in it,
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and I'll blow out my liver.
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Hey, it's his birthday!
Did you hear that?
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Happy birthday!
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I just wanted the day
to come and go like any other day.
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I think you can
pull that off.
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Well, now, I mean,
despite the fact that
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you don't want to make
a big fuss out of it,
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we all chipped in
and got you something.
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Now what is it that you want
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more than anything else
in the world?
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Another beer.
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Close your eyes there,
Mr. Peterson.
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Hey, hey.
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Oh, God.
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What could it be?
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Let me see...
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It's a beer!
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Thanks, you guys.
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Thank you.
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Hey, I got you
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a very, very special gift,
my friend.
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More special
than a free beer?
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- Yeah, come here.
- Is it a keg and a snorkel?
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Stand right here.
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Now I know what a big fan
of the Celtics you are, so...
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here's your present.
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Kevin McHale?
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00:05:56,565 --> 00:05:58,733
Sammy, I love the guy,
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00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:00,819
but I know where to draw the line.
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No, no, no, no.
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He's just delivering it.
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00:06:03,822 --> 00:06:05,365
Come on, Kevin.
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00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:07,367
Norm, Sammy tells me
what a big fan you are of the team,
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so on behalf of myself
and the Celtics,
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I'd like you to have
this team jacket.
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Happy birthday.
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Thanks, man, all right.
Look at this.
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Hey, hey.
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Hey, hey...
Smile.
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Sam, how do you work
the flash on this thing?
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I got my hands full
here, what do you--
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Oh!
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All right.
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What a birthday, huh?
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A free beer,
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a Celtics jacket
from Kevin McHale,
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and Sammy wiping out my bar tab.
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Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.
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I didn't say anything
about wiping out a bar tab.
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Well, happy birthday to me.
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Hey, Sammy, I came through
with that jacket for Norm.
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Where's that autographed
Red Sox baseball you got for me?
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Oh, right, right, right,
I'll be right back.
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Is it almost ready?
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Yeah. How many G's in Boggs?
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Two.
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Is that all?
It doesn't look right.
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Hey.
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Hey. Thank you, Sammy.
I'm going to use the phone,
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- all right?
- Yeah, anytime, anytime.
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- Normie.
- Yeah?
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Even though I chipped in
for the beer with the guys,
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I also got you another
special little gift.
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Yeah? What's that?
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Well, I did some research
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on the historical
significance of birthdays.
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Uncovered a lot
of interesting facts,
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and...
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...I'm not going
to share them with you.
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Happy birthday, big guy.
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Say, Kevin...
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00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:36,873
You know, my birthday's
coming up pretty soon.
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Maybe you can come back
and deliver something for me.
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Would you like
a jacket, too?
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Yeah, right-- A jacket.
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Well, guys...
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I feel like I own
a little bit of Celtic history.
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Some of my fondest
memories as a boy
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are going down to the Garden,
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00:07:53,515 --> 00:07:56,101
being in the same building
as all my heroes,
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sitting there next to my dad
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as he ordered beer after beer
rom the vendor,
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saying to myself,
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"Someday, someday."
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That's great.
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Ah, the Garden--
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00:08:08,863 --> 00:08:10,782
The Garden's
perhaps the most famous
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00:08:10,949 --> 00:08:12,575
playing surface in all of sports.
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- Yeah?
- Well, you know,
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00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:15,620
it's a little known fact
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that that parquet floor is comprised
of 240 individual squares
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held down by 2,860 bolts.
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Ah, you're wrong
there.
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It's 2,880 bolts.
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And I got that
from a member of the bull gang,
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the crew that works the floor.
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Well, I'm very sorry, Norm,
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but my source
is unimpeachable.
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Yeah, who's that?
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My ma.
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Why don't we settle this
right now?
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I'll call the Garden
and find out, huh?
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Oh, yeah,
who are we supposed to talk to--
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The guy in charge of bolts?
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We got McHale here.
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Why don't we just
ask him?
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- Kevin?
- Yeah.
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Tell this guy
how many bolts
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there are in floor of the Garden,
please.
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Well, I've never noticed any bolts
in that floor.
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You know,
come to think of it,
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I bet bird, parish--
I bet nobody knows
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00:08:58,955 --> 00:09:00,582
How many bolts
are in that floor, huh?
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00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:02,459
There's a game for you.
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00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:03,752
Hey, stop, stop,
stop, stop it!
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00:09:03,918 --> 00:09:05,628
Just turn around
and run the other way.
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00:09:05,795 --> 00:09:07,255
Well, what are you
talking about?
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00:09:07,422 --> 00:09:09,424
Oh, Kevin, I am warning you
because I love you.
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00:09:09,591 --> 00:09:11,551
Don't get caught up
in one of those conversations.
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00:09:11,718 --> 00:09:13,053
You'll end up
like those guys.
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They never leave
their stools.
193
00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:17,849
It's a disease,
and they're trying to hook you.
194
00:09:18,016 --> 00:09:21,102
I knew this guy once
who was a respected psychiatrist.
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00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:24,481
It's too late for him.
196
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But you can
still save yourself.
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00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:28,443
Come on.
Okay, yeah, yeah.
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00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,111
I got a game in an hour. I'd like
to talk about those bolts, you guys,
199
00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:31,821
But I got to run.
Take care.
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00:09:31,988 --> 00:09:33,698
Thank God.
201
00:09:33,865 --> 00:09:36,367
Hey, I tell you what, though,
if you multiply the number of bolts
202
00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:38,578
by the number of squares
in that thing,
203
00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:40,371
you'd be able to find out
how many bolts there were.
204
00:09:40,538 --> 00:09:42,624
Oh, Lord,
take him now.
205
00:09:48,505 --> 00:09:49,923
One minute to go
in the game...
206
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:51,299
Here we go!
207
00:09:51,466 --> 00:09:53,134
Come on, guys.
208
00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:55,053
Frasier...
209
00:09:57,514 --> 00:10:00,391
I've just come
from the beauty salon.
210
00:10:00,558 --> 00:10:03,394
I asked them to do something
a little different with my hair.
211
00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:05,063
Then you actually
went through with it?
212
00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,524
Oh, my darling,
I'm all anticipation.
213
00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:11,569
I've never seen you out
without your by now trademark chignon.
214
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:14,531
Thus the change.
215
00:10:20,328 --> 00:10:22,205
What do you think,
Frasier?
216
00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:24,290
It's hard to say.
217
00:10:37,887 --> 00:10:40,140
You're laughing.
218
00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:43,184
I'm sorry, dear.
You're taking it all the wrong way.
219
00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:45,395
You see, it was just the initial reaction
of seeing you different.
220
00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:48,940
You know, now that I look
at it again, it's-- Ha ha ha!
221
00:10:49,107 --> 00:10:51,151
Stop laughing.
222
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:52,277
You're hurting my feelings.
223
00:10:52,443 --> 00:10:54,779
I'm sorry. Your what?
224
00:10:54,946 --> 00:10:56,906
No, darling,
please, please.
225
00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:58,408
Give me another chance.
226
00:10:58,575 --> 00:11:00,451
Please. Another chance.
227
00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:02,620
Please.
228
00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:05,415
Ha ha ha ha!
229
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:09,669
Ten seconds to go.
The Celtics down by two.
230
00:11:09,836 --> 00:11:12,005
McHale's got the ball.
231
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:13,548
He goes up!
232
00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:15,049
He's in the clear!
233
00:11:15,216 --> 00:11:17,510
Oh, no!
McHale blows the lay-up.
234
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:20,597
And that's the game,
and the Celtics lose.
235
00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:23,224
Cleveland 102, Boston 100.
236
00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:26,352
I've never seen Kevin
play that poorly before in my life.
237
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:27,645
What was he
doing out there?
238
00:11:27,812 --> 00:11:30,190
I don't know, I mean, he wasn't
even looking at the other players.
239
00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,483
He was just staring at the floor
and moving his lips.
240
00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:36,321
I think he was counting
the bolts on the floor.
241
00:11:36,487 --> 00:11:38,781
Oh, come on. He wouldn't do that
in the middle of a game.
242
00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:40,867
Hey, look, they're going
to interview Kevin.
243
00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:42,452
This is Glenn Ordway
on the floor of the Garden.
244
00:11:42,619 --> 00:11:44,996
We're going to see
if we can catch Kevin McHale,
245
00:11:45,163 --> 00:11:46,456
ask him a couple of questions
246
00:11:46,623 --> 00:11:48,291
and find out exactly
what went wrong
247
00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:50,210
out on the floor here tonight.
248
00:11:50,376 --> 00:11:51,836
Here he comes right now.
249
00:11:52,003 --> 00:11:53,504
Kevin, can I ask you
a couple of questions?
250
00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:57,634
109, 110, 111, 112...
251
00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,261
Now look
at what you've done.
252
00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:03,806
You have ruined him.
You have ruined Kevin McHale!
253
00:12:03,973 --> 00:12:05,350
You took the scoring machine,
254
00:12:05,516 --> 00:12:08,770
one of Boston's greatest
living sports legends,
255
00:12:08,937 --> 00:12:10,104
and turned him into...
256
00:12:10,271 --> 00:12:12,899
...one of you.
257
00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:19,530
Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin!
258
00:12:29,791 --> 00:12:31,501
Cheers.
259
00:12:31,668 --> 00:12:32,710
Yeah, Sammy, this is Kevin.
260
00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:34,254
Hey, Kevin.
Hey, Kevin McHale.
261
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:35,797
- Kevin.
- Hey, Kevin.
262
00:12:35,964 --> 00:12:38,299
Hey, Sammy,
boy, I'm having a rough night.
263
00:12:38,466 --> 00:12:40,468
Yeah. Ooh, boy.
We caught the game.
264
00:12:40,635 --> 00:12:42,595
Yeah, you really
stunk it up out there, huh?
265
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:44,514
Hey, I saw you pitch.
266
00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:46,474
You're not entitled
to an opinion.
267
00:12:47,183 --> 00:12:49,060
You know what it is, though?
268
00:12:49,227 --> 00:12:52,230
It's those bolts. I tell you,
I can't get 'em out of my mind.
269
00:12:52,397 --> 00:12:53,940
And I've called
the people all over town,
270
00:12:54,107 --> 00:12:55,942
and no two people seem to have
the same answer.
271
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:57,735
Sammy,
it's driving me crazy.
272
00:12:57,902 --> 00:12:59,570
Kevin, you got to take it easy with this.
273
00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:01,572
I mean, bar trivia
can eat you up, pal.
274
00:13:01,739 --> 00:13:04,909
Kevin, it's not too late.
Get help.
275
00:13:05,076 --> 00:13:06,911
Honey, who's that?
276
00:13:07,078 --> 00:13:08,621
Just the guys down at Cheers.
277
00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:22,093
My motive, of course,
was to please Frasier,
278
00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:25,096
but this evening after dinner,
he laughed so hard
279
00:13:25,263 --> 00:13:27,307
cappuccino ran out
of his nose.
280
00:13:29,392 --> 00:13:31,394
Rebecca, you're a friend.
281
00:13:31,561 --> 00:13:35,690
Does this permanent
make my hair look utterly ridiculous?
282
00:13:35,857 --> 00:13:37,650
Oh, not at all.
283
00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:39,444
I think it's a delightful change.
284
00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:40,903
So do I.
285
00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:42,947
Damn that Frasier.
For a moment,
286
00:13:43,114 --> 00:13:45,366
he had me believing
I was a laughing stock.
287
00:13:45,533 --> 00:13:47,243
Thank you.
288
00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:49,787
Don't mention it.
What are friends for?
289
00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:53,666
How can you just
stand there staring at that hairdo
290
00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:55,960
and not bust a gut laughing?
291
00:13:56,127 --> 00:13:58,755
No problem.
292
00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:00,298
Ow.
293
00:14:00,465 --> 00:14:02,925
Hi, everybody.
294
00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:04,177
Hey. Kevin.
295
00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:05,928
How come you're not
in bed, man?
296
00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:08,348
I couldn't sleep.
297
00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:09,724
You got a big game tomorrow.
298
00:14:09,891 --> 00:14:11,309
I don't care.
299
00:14:12,727 --> 00:14:14,896
All I care about
are those bolts,
300
00:14:15,063 --> 00:14:17,231
so I ran out and got a set
of blueprints to the Garden.
301
00:14:17,398 --> 00:14:19,776
Find out how many bolts
there are in that floor right now.
302
00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:20,985
Wait a minute,
now where did you get
303
00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:22,278
blueprints this time of night?
304
00:14:22,445 --> 00:14:23,863
I know somebody
down at City Hall.
305
00:14:24,030 --> 00:14:25,740
Kind of a sports legend
in this town, huh?
306
00:14:25,907 --> 00:14:27,950
Yeah, right.
307
00:14:28,117 --> 00:14:29,911
Oh, hey. Gee, I'm sorry, kid,
308
00:14:30,078 --> 00:14:31,412
but these are the blueprints
309
00:14:31,579 --> 00:14:33,164
for the new Garden
that they're building.
310
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:35,625
Yeah, yeah, you see,
there should be a mailbox right there.
311
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,294
Oh, no.
312
00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:41,381
Give me that phone. I hope
the mayor's still up. Give me that phone.
313
00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:43,007
No, no, no, I don't think
you should do that, man.
314
00:14:43,174 --> 00:14:44,801
- Don't do that.
- Sammy, I'm telling you right now,
315
00:14:44,967 --> 00:14:46,594
I got to know.
I got to know.
316
00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:49,055
I'm telling you, nothing,
I mean, nothing's going to stop me.
317
00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:50,765
Kevin?
318
00:14:50,932 --> 00:14:52,725
Good night, guys.
319
00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:57,897
You guys should be
ashamed of yourselves.
320
00:14:58,064 --> 00:14:59,524
You're like vampires.
321
00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:03,236
Big-butted,
do-nothing vampires.
322
00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:05,738
And now you're trying
to make Kevin one of your recruits.
323
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:07,407
Well, I say
it's got to stop.
324
00:15:07,573 --> 00:15:09,700
I'm not going to let you
screw up his career.
325
00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:11,786
Oh, come on,
lighten up, will ya?
326
00:15:11,953 --> 00:15:14,163
It's just, Kevin's getting a little
carried away with bolts, that's all.
327
00:15:14,330 --> 00:15:17,083
Yeah, sure, Sammy, today it's
how many bolts are in the floor.
328
00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:18,835
Tomorrow they'll have him onto
329
00:15:19,001 --> 00:15:20,878
"if the Brady Bunch
crashes in the Andes,
330
00:15:21,045 --> 00:15:23,047
who's going to eat who first?"
331
00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:27,760
Well, they'd probably eat the maid,
'cause she ain't kin.
332
00:15:30,805 --> 00:15:32,473
Well, you know,
but if they're smart,
333
00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:35,601
they'll ask her first
how she should best prepare herself.
334
00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:37,395
Stop this!
335
00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:40,648
All right,
so what do we do?
336
00:15:40,815 --> 00:15:42,275
Well, we'll go down
to the Garden
337
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:45,236
and just count the bolts in the floor
so we can settle this thing
338
00:15:45,403 --> 00:15:46,696
and get Kevin back on his game,
all right?
339
00:15:46,863 --> 00:15:48,197
Well, how are we going
to get in there, Sam?
340
00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:51,826
- Don't they lock the Garden at night?
- Woody, don't worry about those locks.
341
00:15:51,993 --> 00:15:54,954
We can get past any one of them
with my trusty Swiss Army Knife.
342
00:15:55,580 --> 00:15:58,875
Yeah, I got the big one
with the tweezer-toothpick combo.
343
00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:00,960
That's a beauty,
Mr. Clavin.
344
00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:03,171
Yeah, thanks, Woody.
345
00:16:03,337 --> 00:16:05,381
Yeah, every soldier
in the Swiss Army owns one of these.
346
00:16:05,548 --> 00:16:08,509
That's why nobody messes
with Switzerland.
347
00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:10,595
Yeah, I'd rather run buck naked
through the neighborhood
348
00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:12,096
than be without this baby.
349
00:16:12,263 --> 00:16:14,515
Why is that always
the other option?
350
00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:27,236
Whoa. Ho ho.
351
00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:28,446
Are they on?
352
00:16:28,613 --> 00:16:30,364
Yeah.
353
00:16:30,531 --> 00:16:33,826
Look at this, huh?
Boston Garden.
354
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:36,662
I wake up this morning
thinking my life has no meaning,
355
00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:39,707
and now
I'm standing here.
356
00:16:39,874 --> 00:16:42,251
Yeah, it really, really kind of
clears things up, doesn't it, Norm?
357
00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:44,378
Well, I'm still pretty sure
my life has no meaning,
358
00:16:44,545 --> 00:16:46,047
but I'm standing here.
359
00:16:48,341 --> 00:16:50,718
Every part of this place
is special to me.
360
00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:53,471
- Yeah?
- Sacred.
361
00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:55,598
It's holy, you know,
like a cathedral.
362
00:16:56,933 --> 00:16:58,476
I'll rip a seat out
363
00:16:58,643 --> 00:16:59,977
and throw it in the back
of my car, huh?
364
00:17:00,144 --> 00:17:01,229
Hey, hey!
365
00:17:01,395 --> 00:17:02,897
Stand back, get back.
366
00:17:03,064 --> 00:17:05,107
Hey, Mr. Clavin,
I have a question.
367
00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:06,943
Yeah, fire away there.
368
00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:08,903
Well, how can they play
hockey in here? There's no ice.
369
00:17:09,070 --> 00:17:11,531
Well, the ice is right
under the floor there, Wood.
370
00:17:11,697 --> 00:17:13,115
It's under the floor right now?
371
00:17:13,282 --> 00:17:14,575
Absolutely.
372
00:17:14,742 --> 00:17:16,118
Why don't you pick one
of these things up.
373
00:17:16,285 --> 00:17:18,955
Have a looksie. Here.
Use my Swiss Army Knife.
374
00:17:19,121 --> 00:17:21,249
I don't know if anyone would mind
if we shot a few hoops.
375
00:17:21,415 --> 00:17:22,333
Hey, where'd you get that?
376
00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:24,377
Been in the trunk of my car
since the last time I was at the gym.
377
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:25,878
Let's run the floor.
378
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,088
All right, here we go.
379
00:17:28,756 --> 00:17:31,759
When was the last time
you were at a gym?
380
00:17:31,926 --> 00:17:33,803
I don't know, I used to go
to that one next door to Cheers.
381
00:17:33,970 --> 00:17:36,138
There's no gym
next door to Cheers.
382
00:17:36,305 --> 00:17:38,182
Yeah, there was. They tore it down,
they put up that bookstore.
383
00:17:38,349 --> 00:17:39,392
There's no bookstore
there, either.
384
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:40,643
Oh, they tore that down,
385
00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:42,103
they put the bank there.
386
00:17:42,270 --> 00:17:43,229
The bank's been there
as long as I remember.
387
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,605
Well, there you go.
388
00:17:46,274 --> 00:17:47,692
Wow.
389
00:17:47,858 --> 00:17:49,652
Well, what have we here?
390
00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:51,070
Looks like plywood.
391
00:17:51,237 --> 00:17:52,863
Oh, great. Hey,
392
00:17:53,030 --> 00:17:54,782
I can use the saw.
393
00:17:56,701 --> 00:17:58,411
Oh, great,
somebody's coming.
394
00:17:58,578 --> 00:18:00,246
Woody, put the floor back.
395
00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:02,331
Come on, let's go.
396
00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:06,294
Woody, come on. Hurry up.
397
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:09,755
What a day!
398
00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:12,300
First Sammy gets me
Kevin McHale's jacket.
399
00:18:12,466 --> 00:18:14,635
Then I get to sneak
around the Garden,
400
00:18:14,802 --> 00:18:16,971
even look at the plywood
under the floor.
401
00:18:17,138 --> 00:18:19,223
Now we're getting chased off
by security guards.
402
00:18:19,390 --> 00:18:21,434
Ha ha!
403
00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:23,019
I'm sorry, guys.
404
00:18:23,185 --> 00:18:25,813
I've never had
a more beautiful day in my life.
405
00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:31,569
Drinking alone?
406
00:18:31,736 --> 00:18:35,615
No. Frasier asked
to meet me here today.
407
00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:37,950
He probably wants
a few more boorish laughs
408
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:40,286
at my hair's expense.
409
00:18:40,453 --> 00:18:42,163
Well, if it's any
consolation to you,
410
00:18:42,330 --> 00:18:44,749
I think that look
does something for you.
411
00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:46,500
Thank you.
412
00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:48,252
I didn't say what.
413
00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:53,090
Lilith...
414
00:18:54,425 --> 00:18:56,135
Please don't speak.
415
00:18:56,302 --> 00:18:58,929
I've behaved abominably.
416
00:18:59,096 --> 00:19:01,182
You had the courage
to try something different
417
00:19:01,349 --> 00:19:02,975
in order to please me,
418
00:19:03,142 --> 00:19:04,894
and I've repaid you
with mockery,
419
00:19:05,061 --> 00:19:06,896
which is unforgivable.
420
00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,315
But I-- I hope
you can forgive me,
421
00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:11,776
because I love you,
and I love your hair,
422
00:19:11,942 --> 00:19:15,112
and no matter how you might change
your outer appearance,
423
00:19:15,279 --> 00:19:19,784
you'll always be the most beautiful woman
in the world to me.
424
00:19:19,950 --> 00:19:22,578
Oh, Frasier.
425
00:19:31,295 --> 00:19:34,215
Thanks, Rebecca.
426
00:19:34,382 --> 00:19:36,008
I'd better keep one.
427
00:19:38,219 --> 00:19:40,513
There you go.
428
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,932
Kevin's playing a little
better tonight, huh?
429
00:19:43,099 --> 00:19:44,767
Yeah, of course he is.
As soon as I told him
430
00:19:44,934 --> 00:19:45,976
how many bolts
were in the floor,
431
00:19:46,143 --> 00:19:48,688
- he just settled right into his game.
- Well, how could you tell him that?
432
00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:49,980
We never had a chance
to count 'em.
433
00:19:51,565 --> 00:19:53,275
Well, I just made up
a number, you know?
434
00:19:53,442 --> 00:19:55,236
I figured he'll never
know the difference.
435
00:19:55,403 --> 00:19:57,571
As long as it improves his game,
you know, what's the harm?
436
00:19:57,738 --> 00:19:59,156
Hey.
437
00:19:59,323 --> 00:20:01,367
Sam, I have a question.
438
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,285
Not now, Woody.
I'm watching the game here.
439
00:20:03,452 --> 00:20:04,745
No. it's really important.
440
00:20:04,912 --> 00:20:06,372
What?
441
00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:08,082
Well, say a guy
removed the bolts
442
00:20:08,249 --> 00:20:10,292
from a piece of floor
in a very important building--
443
00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:13,379
Like, I don't know, say,
the Boston Garden.
444
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,464
And say a guard came
and he didn't have time
445
00:20:15,631 --> 00:20:18,300
to put the bolts
back in the floor,
446
00:20:18,467 --> 00:20:20,010
what would happen?
447
00:20:20,177 --> 00:20:22,722
You didn't put the bolts back
in the floor, Woody?
448
00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:24,390
Oh, I knew you'd guess it.
449
00:20:24,557 --> 00:20:26,892
I should have just
been honest with you, Sam.
450
00:20:28,185 --> 00:20:29,437
What should I do?
451
00:20:29,603 --> 00:20:30,855
Ah, relax,
will you, Woody.
452
00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:32,606
For crying out loud,
they got a crew there
453
00:20:32,773 --> 00:20:34,650
to check on everything
before the game.
454
00:20:34,817 --> 00:20:36,235
I'm sure they just found
the missing bolts
455
00:20:36,402 --> 00:20:38,362
and replaced them.
I mean, even if they don't,
456
00:20:38,529 --> 00:20:41,407
I mean, what are the odds of somebody
hitting that spot exactly, huh?
457
00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:43,492
Bird passes to McHale.
458
00:20:43,659 --> 00:20:45,327
McHale at mid-court stops short.
459
00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,246
Oh, he's tripped
on something, he's down.
460
00:20:47,413 --> 00:20:50,249
It looks like a piece of the floor
came up.
461
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:53,252
Bird's just looking at it.
462
00:20:53,419 --> 00:20:55,337
Oh, no!
463
00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:57,298
I really did it this time.
464
00:20:57,465 --> 00:20:59,633
No, no, no, don't blame
yourself, Woody.
465
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:02,428
It's my fault.
It was my birthday,
466
00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,805
I'm the one who got him
all interested in the bolts.
467
00:21:04,972 --> 00:21:06,932
It's me who dragged us all out there
468
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:08,392
in the middle of the night
to go count bolts.
469
00:21:08,559 --> 00:21:09,935
I mean, it's my fault.
470
00:21:10,102 --> 00:21:13,439
It never wouldn't have happened
if I didn't have my Swiss Army Knife.
471
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:15,941
Guys, it was my fault.
472
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:17,526
I'm the one who took the bolts
out of the floor.
473
00:21:17,693 --> 00:21:19,820
He's right, you know.
474
00:21:19,987 --> 00:21:21,113
That's true.
475
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:22,615
Why are we being so hard
on ourselves?
476
00:21:22,782 --> 00:21:24,200
Yeah, you heard him admit
that, didn't you?
477
00:21:24,366 --> 00:21:26,076
You guys, you heard it?
478
00:21:35,878 --> 00:21:37,338
Hey, Kevin,
how you feeling?
479
00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:40,508
Not too good, Woody.
I don't know what happened out there.
480
00:21:40,674 --> 00:21:42,009
I must look like an idiot.
481
00:21:42,176 --> 00:21:44,011
It was my fault.
482
00:21:44,178 --> 00:21:45,679
How could it be your fault?
483
00:21:45,846 --> 00:21:48,057
I'm the clown
that slipped and fell.
484
00:21:48,224 --> 00:21:50,726
You're right, you were.
You heard him, guys. Let's get out of here.
485
00:21:50,893 --> 00:21:53,729
Listen, we have
a confession to make, Kevin.
486
00:21:53,896 --> 00:21:56,440
We came over here
the other night to count the bolts.
487
00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:58,025
We kind of got carried away,
488
00:21:58,192 --> 00:22:00,861
and kind of took
some of the bolts out,
489
00:22:01,028 --> 00:22:04,532
and then kind of forgot
to put 'em back in.
490
00:22:04,740 --> 00:22:06,784
You mean to tell me
this really is your fault?
491
00:22:06,951 --> 00:22:08,369
I'm afraid so.
492
00:22:08,577 --> 00:22:12,164
Boy, that figures.
With you guys, that really figures.
493
00:22:14,458 --> 00:22:15,668
Well, tell you what, though,
494
00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:17,378
I just can't stay
too mad at you,
495
00:22:17,545 --> 00:22:19,213
because you finally solved
that bolt question, you know.
496
00:22:19,421 --> 00:22:22,842
We got another
confession to make.
497
00:22:23,050 --> 00:22:25,553
We kind of never
got around to counting the bolts.
498
00:22:25,719 --> 00:22:27,096
Wait a minute, wait,
you're trying to tell me
499
00:22:27,263 --> 00:22:29,056
we still don't know how many bolts
there are in that floor?
500
00:22:29,265 --> 00:22:31,100
Yeah, but what's the difference, man?
You played a great game.
501
00:22:31,267 --> 00:22:32,685
Yeah, but what about
tomorrow's game?
502
00:22:38,649 --> 00:22:42,736
- 1,217.
- No, hold on, I already counted that one.
503
00:22:48,117 --> 00:22:50,244
One...
504
00:22:50,494 --> 00:22:52,746
Two... Three...