1
00:00:01,627 --> 00:00:04,338
Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
2
00:00:07,716 --> 00:00:10,177
Hi, this is Cheers.
Leave a message at the beep.
3
00:00:11,803 --> 00:00:15,557
Norm, this is Vera.
Please pick up.
4
00:00:16,934 --> 00:00:17,976
Norm.
5
00:00:18,435 --> 00:00:19,603
Norm.
6
00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:27,945
Hi, this is Cheers.
Leave a message at the beep.
7
00:00:29,613 --> 00:00:31,990
Norm, I know you're there.
8
00:00:33,075 --> 00:00:34,993
Pick up the phone, Norm.
9
00:00:35,577 --> 00:00:37,788
It's 3:00 in the morning.
10
00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:40,165
I want you to come home.
11
00:00:40,332 --> 00:00:41,375
Norm.
12
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:43,377
Norm.
13
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:52,803
Hi, this is Cheers.
Leave a message at the beep.
14
00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:57,808
Hi, Sam. This is Vera Peterson again.
15
00:00:58,642 --> 00:01:01,061
Listen,
ignore those messages.
16
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:05,816
It turns out Norm was here in bed
next to me the whole time.
17
00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:10,404
And I thought
that big lump was our dog.
18
00:01:11,488 --> 00:01:12,489
Who knew?
19
00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:30,317
That's it.
The furnace is definitely out.
20
00:02:30,734 --> 00:02:32,778
Any luck trying to get through
to the repairman?
21
00:02:32,944 --> 00:02:34,655
No. it's still busy.
22
00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:36,406
Well, why don't you try
calling someone else?
23
00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:39,618
What kind of manager are you
if you can't handle a simple problem like that?
24
00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,995
Sam, this is the only people in Boston
who can service
25
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:44,539
that Guatemalan furnace
you bought on sale.
26
00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:46,208
Well, keep trying.
27
00:02:48,877 --> 00:02:50,921
It's ringing.
Hello? Hi there.
28
00:02:51,088 --> 00:02:53,382
Yes, our furnace is on the blink.
29
00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:57,010
Um, it's the little Diablo model,
the gray one.
30
00:02:58,303 --> 00:03:01,264
It's a full-duct forced-air model.
Huh?
31
00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:05,852
Um, let's see, 55,000 BTUs.
32
00:03:06,937 --> 00:03:08,855
BTUs.
33
00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:12,984
How do I know what that stands for?
You're the Guatemalan.
34
00:03:14,403 --> 00:03:18,073
Carla, good news.
I've given it a lot of thought,
35
00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:21,743
and I've decided to offer my employees
a group medical plan.
36
00:03:22,494 --> 00:03:25,288
Oh, that's great, Sammy.
What changed your mind?
37
00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:28,709
It's the right thing to do.
You guys need it, you deserve it.
38
00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:30,961
It's important to you.
39
00:03:31,128 --> 00:03:33,672
Plus they passed some kind of law.
40
00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:37,509
All right, the thing is,
fellas, listen up.
41
00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:42,347
To qualify for the group rate,
I need one more person to sign on.
42
00:03:42,514 --> 00:03:46,143
Thank God, Sammy. You don't know
what it's like to walk around uninsured,
43
00:03:46,309 --> 00:03:49,104
knowing you might get hit by a bus,
or need an operation,
44
00:03:49,271 --> 00:03:52,733
and hey take your house and your savings,
and that might not even be enough.
45
00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:54,317
You saved my life, Sam.
46
00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:57,571
Actually, Paul, I was kind of thinking
of offering it to Norm.
47
00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:01,867
Hey,
congratulations, Norm.
48
00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:08,331
Woody, why do I have to have
this bag on my hand?
49
00:04:08,498 --> 00:04:10,083
It's for the grand unveiling.
50
00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:12,961
Hi, Kelly. Why do you have
that bag on your hand?
51
00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:16,465
It's to cover up the beautiful engagement ring
that Woody just bought me.
52
00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:19,468
Oh, way to be anticlimactic, Kelly.
53
00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:23,013
There. Ta-da.
54
00:04:23,180 --> 00:04:26,141
Wow, what a beauty.
55
00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:29,311
So, what's going on
over here, you guys?
56
00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:32,481
We saw Kelly coming in
with a bag on her hand.
57
00:04:32,647 --> 00:04:34,483
It's for the grand unveiling
of her engagement ring.
58
00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:37,694
Damn. We thought there was going to be
a puppet show.
59
00:04:38,987 --> 00:04:40,989
Well, I've got to get going, Woody.
60
00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:44,242
I'm meeting my lawyer
about the prenuptial agreement. Bye.
61
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:48,705
You guys have a prenuptial agreement?
62
00:04:48,914 --> 00:04:51,875
Sure. Oh, I love her,
but I'm not stupid.
63
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:55,754
God forbid things don't work out,
64
00:04:55,921 --> 00:04:57,547
I don't want to lose
half my stuff.
65
00:04:59,341 --> 00:05:01,134
Good thinking, Woody.
66
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,303
So, uh, Wood, that's a nice ring.
67
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:04,679
Have her parents seen it yet?
68
00:05:04,846 --> 00:05:07,682
No, they will in a couple days.
They're gonna throw us an engagement party.
69
00:05:07,849 --> 00:05:09,309
A party? Cool.
70
00:05:09,518 --> 00:05:11,937
Her grandmother's even coming
all the way from Florida.
71
00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:15,398
She's kind of the head of the family.
From what I hear, she's pretty scary.
72
00:05:15,607 --> 00:05:18,860
She's bossy, mean, and tough as nails.
You wouldn't want to mess with her.
73
00:05:19,027 --> 00:05:20,946
Oh, yeah? Bet you my ma
could take her.
74
00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:24,157
Gloves or bare fists,
open hand, closed hand, I don't care.
75
00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:28,036
Well, I've drawn up
a list of names
76
00:05:28,203 --> 00:05:30,121
of the people I want
to invite to the party.
77
00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:32,374
The only problems is I only
get to invite a few.
78
00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:34,000
Where do you draw the line?
79
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:36,336
Well, Woody, something that
Lilith and I find helpful
80
00:05:36,503 --> 00:05:39,548
when we plan a party is to simply
start at the bottom of the list
81
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:41,550
and eliminate the least desirable.
82
00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,719
Okay, Cranes are out.
83
00:05:47,764 --> 00:05:50,517
Thanks, Dr. Crane, that was helpful.
84
00:05:54,938 --> 00:05:57,649
So, uh, Woodso,
how much the ring set you back?
85
00:05:57,858 --> 00:05:59,943
Well, they say when you buy
an engagement ring,
86
00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:02,821
you're supposed to spend
the equivalent of six months' salary,
87
00:06:02,988 --> 00:06:06,700
but it looked kind of naked
without a diamond in it.
88
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,327
So how much are we talking,
over a grand or what?
89
00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:11,621
Well, the salesman said
that it's bad luck
90
00:06:11,788 --> 00:06:14,249
for the couple to know
how much the ring cost.
91
00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:17,627
Woody,
92
00:06:18,086 --> 00:06:20,297
how are you going
to afford that on your salary?
93
00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:22,257
Don't worry, Sam,
I'm getting a night job.
94
00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:25,051
You're going to go do another job
95
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,887
after you leave here
at 2:30 in the morning?
96
00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:29,347
Yup. Graveyard shift.
97
00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:31,099
Where?
98
00:06:32,100 --> 00:06:33,685
Graveyard, Sam.
99
00:06:35,604 --> 00:06:38,189
Gee whiz, say good night, Gracie.
100
00:06:39,858 --> 00:06:41,443
The maintenance sticker?
101
00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,863
I don't know.
It's pretty dark in there.
102
00:06:45,030 --> 00:06:47,032
All right, hold on a second.
103
00:06:52,621 --> 00:06:54,039
Carla, hand me the phone.
104
00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:57,959
- Here you go.
- Thank you.
105
00:06:58,126 --> 00:07:01,379
All right, I'm wiping off
the maintenance sticker now.
106
00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:06,092
Well, according to this,
the heater was last serviced...
107
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,470
This heater has
never been serviced.
108
00:07:08,845 --> 00:07:11,723
I guess you don't need--
Carla, what are you doing?
109
00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:13,016
Carla, what is that noise?
110
00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:16,061
Well, I'm putting
this grate back on.
111
00:07:16,227 --> 00:07:19,314
You know, it's a little dangerous
to have it lying around out here.
112
00:07:19,481 --> 00:07:20,815
Carla...
113
00:07:21,191 --> 00:07:24,110
Now, this is not funny.
You let me out of here right now.
114
00:07:25,487 --> 00:07:28,073
Fine. I'm gonna call the police.
115
00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:29,449
Boy, you know,
116
00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:32,661
one of our patrons
could trip on this wire.
117
00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:38,041
Oh, great. Now the phone
doesn't work, either.
118
00:07:43,088 --> 00:07:45,674
All right. It's closing time.
Everybody out.
119
00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,426
Mr. Peterson, Mr. Clavin, come on.
Let's go. I'm already late.
120
00:07:48,593 --> 00:07:53,264
Come on. I mean the bar closes at 2:00.
It's just now... 2:30.
121
00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:58,144
Tonight it's my first night at the graveyard.
I don't want to be late, all right?
122
00:07:58,311 --> 00:08:00,981
Now come on. You guys really got to go.
Let's go. Come on.
123
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:03,191
Woody, Woody, hold it, hold it.
What's the rush?
124
00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:05,777
It's not like your customers
are gonna be going anywhere.
125
00:08:07,612 --> 00:08:09,155
- Huh?
- Yeah.
126
00:08:09,948 --> 00:08:13,660
But, you know, it is going to be
awfully lonely out there, Wood.
127
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:16,454
Oh, no, Norm, don't worry.
You'll have plenty of company.
128
00:08:16,705 --> 00:08:19,749
They won't be too talkative,
what with their lips sewn shut.
129
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:23,503
You don't actually have
to see the bodies, do you?
130
00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:25,130
I mean, they're in the coffins, right?
131
00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:27,757
Oh, yeah, most of them are.
the ones that can afford it.
132
00:08:29,634 --> 00:08:31,594
The rest of them
they put in body bags
133
00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:34,806
Or sometimes just a big roll
of blotting paper.
134
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:39,728
Sometimes they're just laying about
arms and legs akimbo,
135
00:08:40,311 --> 00:08:43,857
their lips drawn in a ghastly rictus.
136
00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:47,193
I don't know what rictus means, Mr. Clavin.
137
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,696
You will by sunup, my lad.
138
00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:52,157
Cut it out, guys.
139
00:08:53,241 --> 00:08:55,952
All right, yeah, come on.
We'd better Toodle along.
140
00:08:56,119 --> 00:08:58,830
I understand there, though, Norm,
that the brain stays alive
141
00:08:58,997 --> 00:09:00,874
long after the body's lying in the coffin.
142
00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:05,420
That poor, desperate soul in there
trying to scream out,
143
00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:07,213
"Don't bury me. I'm not dead yet!"
144
00:09:07,839 --> 00:09:11,468
But all they can muster
is one final frantic gurgle.
145
00:09:11,634 --> 00:09:12,552
Oh, the gurgle.
146
00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:15,555
Listen for that gurgle, Woody.
You listen for that gurgle.
147
00:09:15,764 --> 00:09:18,683
Hey, you guys are just
trying to scare me, all right?
148
00:09:19,601 --> 00:09:22,562
Forget it. I got a job to do.
I got a ring to pay for, get out.
149
00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:25,356
- Arrgh.
- Good night, Woody.
150
00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:27,901
- See ya.
- Good night, Mr. Peterson, Mr. Clavin.
151
00:09:29,277 --> 00:09:31,488
Want to take a cab?
152
00:09:33,615 --> 00:09:34,908
Yeah, oh, man.
153
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,493
Buried alive.
154
00:09:36,659 --> 00:09:38,244
Give me a break.
155
00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:40,080
Woody.
156
00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:43,291
Will someone let me out of here?
157
00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:44,459
Aah!
158
00:09:44,626 --> 00:09:45,585
Mr. Peterson!
159
00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:46,920
Mr. Clavin!
160
00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:01,101
Excuse me, Miss, I've been sent to collect
some specimens.
161
00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:03,978
Oh, they're sitting over there
on the other side of the bar.
162
00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:09,526
No, I'm from the insurance company.
I need to do a blood sample on each employee.
163
00:10:09,692 --> 00:10:12,612
Oh. Well, he works here.
Take him first.
164
00:10:12,779 --> 00:10:13,780
Fine.
165
00:10:15,490 --> 00:10:16,491
Shall we go?
166
00:10:16,658 --> 00:10:19,035
Yeah, what part of the body
do you need to take blood from?
167
00:10:19,202 --> 00:10:22,205
- Any part that's soft and fleshy.
- Well, have I got a treat for you.
168
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:28,419
Hi, guys.
Sorry I'm late.
169
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,925
Woody, you look terrible.
170
00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:36,261
Yeah, I came straight
from the graveyard.
171
00:10:36,427 --> 00:10:38,346
This is the worst night yet.
172
00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:39,848
Why was that, Wood?
173
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:41,850
Well, a couple of guys called in sick.
174
00:10:42,016 --> 00:10:44,185
And then,
we couldn't seem to bury
175
00:10:44,352 --> 00:10:47,021
old Mrs. Jane Vanderhooven,
beloved wife and mother.
176
00:10:47,188 --> 00:10:48,815
It's like she didn't want to go down.
177
00:10:50,233 --> 00:10:52,235
First the backhoe broke,
178
00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:54,320
and we had to dig the hole by hand,
179
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,364
and then ground was frozen
180
00:10:56,531 --> 00:10:59,367
and broke the handle on the shovel.
181
00:10:59,534 --> 00:11:02,412
And then the coffin kept popping open.
182
00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:05,874
You never get used to that, Sam.
183
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,835
Don't suppose you do.
184
00:11:09,544 --> 00:11:12,755
And then when we finally buried
old Mrs. Jane Vanderhooven,
185
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,257
beloved wife and mother,
186
00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:19,220
there was this strange
gurgling sound. And...
187
00:11:19,387 --> 00:11:22,515
I knew it was probably just
old Gus finishing his shake,
188
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:25,852
but, well, you don't
want to take chances
189
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:27,228
on something like that,
190
00:11:27,395 --> 00:11:30,523
so I had to dig her up and check it.
191
00:11:33,651 --> 00:11:34,986
What a night.
192
00:11:35,153 --> 00:11:37,822
I don't think you're gonna make it, man.
This job's gonna kill you.
193
00:11:38,031 --> 00:11:41,492
Oh, Sam, I gotta earn enough money
to pay for the ring.
194
00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:49,876
It helps to do that
every now and then.
195
00:11:56,341 --> 00:11:58,176
Thank you, Mr. Peterson.
196
00:11:58,593 --> 00:11:59,594
Who's next?
197
00:12:01,095 --> 00:12:02,096
How about you?
198
00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:04,307
No. Actually, I don't work here.
199
00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:07,352
I'm just one of the moms in the neighborhood
who comes in to help out.
200
00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:10,104
Take him.
201
00:12:10,855 --> 00:12:13,274
Woody, wake up.
The man's waiting for you.
202
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:14,567
Do you work here?
203
00:12:14,859 --> 00:12:16,861
Yeah. I'm sorry I'm late.
204
00:12:17,028 --> 00:12:18,446
Let's go take some blood.
205
00:12:18,613 --> 00:12:19,697
Just for being late?
206
00:12:21,032 --> 00:12:23,076
This is the toughest job I ever had.
207
00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:26,913
Man, no way I'm going
to let that quack jab me.
208
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:30,458
Carla, there's really nothing to be afraid of.
It's a very simple process.
209
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:31,751
Here, let me show you.
210
00:12:31,918 --> 00:12:32,961
Darling, may I?
211
00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:34,879
They'll simply take your arm.
212
00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:36,839
They'll have you make a fist.
213
00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:40,301
Then they'll place a tourniquet here,
exposing a vein.
214
00:12:41,427 --> 00:12:43,096
Exposing a vein.
215
00:12:47,225 --> 00:12:50,144
Lilith... exactly how do you work?
216
00:12:55,066 --> 00:12:57,402
- All right, where's my money?
- What?
217
00:12:57,568 --> 00:12:59,612
Come on, come on.
You know the routine.
218
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:02,448
I did this earlier. I give you blood,
you give me money.
219
00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:03,908
You gave blood already today?
220
00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:07,620
I didn't give it, I sold it.
I got a ring to pay for, damn you.
221
00:13:08,955 --> 00:13:12,166
Woody, are you saying that after
four days of virtually no sleep at all,
222
00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:13,584
you gave blood today, twice?
223
00:13:13,751 --> 00:13:15,461
- Is that bad?
- Yes!
224
00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:17,505
The body can't take
that kind of punishment.
225
00:13:17,672 --> 00:13:19,924
You're suffering from a lack of blood
and a lack of sleep.
226
00:13:20,258 --> 00:13:22,218
I'm surprised
you're not hallucinating.
227
00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:25,054
Don't worry about me, Dr. Crane. I'm fine.
228
00:13:25,221 --> 00:13:28,474
I just need a little sleep
before that party tomorrow night.
229
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:31,144
Huh, hallucinating?
230
00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:38,026
Woody, why aren't you
dressed for the party?
231
00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:39,861
What party?
232
00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:41,279
Who are you?
233
00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:43,573
Why am I covered with ants?
234
00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:49,454
Hey, Kelly, what happened?
I thought the party was tomorrow night.
235
00:13:49,746 --> 00:13:51,414
Oh, Woody,
didn't you tell them?
236
00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:54,500
I called you days ago and told you
there was a change in plans.
237
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:55,835
Don't you remember?
238
00:13:56,252 --> 00:13:58,004
I remember
you called me days ago,
239
00:13:58,171 --> 00:14:00,548
and I remember you said
there was a change in plans,
240
00:14:00,715 --> 00:14:02,592
but I don't know what
you're talking about.
241
00:14:04,093 --> 00:14:05,595
But, okay, let's go.
242
00:14:05,762 --> 00:14:09,932
All right, pal. Pal, pal.
You're not in any condition to go to this party.
243
00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:13,561
I have to go, Sam. I can't disappoint Kelly.
She's the woman I love.
244
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:18,608
Which one is she, Sam?
245
00:14:30,078 --> 00:14:31,287
Sit down here, Woody.
246
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:32,747
Why don't we catch up
with you?
247
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:36,376
It'll give Woody a chance to change his clothes
and pull himself together.
248
00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:38,961
Actually, Sam,
that's probably a good idea.
249
00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:40,838
Woody is acting kind of out of it tonight.
250
00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:43,549
I mean, he's fumbling around
like he doesn't know where he is
251
00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:44,842
or what he's talking about.
252
00:14:45,051 --> 00:14:46,636
Have you two met?
253
00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,264
I'll see you soon,
Woody.
254
00:14:52,016 --> 00:14:53,184
Here you go, Woody.
255
00:14:53,351 --> 00:14:55,103
Whoa, whoa, whoa, here.
Come on. Come on.
256
00:14:55,269 --> 00:14:57,146
Pull yourself together.
Have some coffee.
257
00:14:58,815 --> 00:15:02,193
Boy, it's true what they say.
Caffeine does get you going.
258
00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:06,531
I figure I got about a half hour
to make a good impression
259
00:15:06,697 --> 00:15:08,533
before my skin starts to blister.
260
00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:11,285
No, no. You're just...
261
00:15:14,205 --> 00:15:15,456
Keep your distance.
262
00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:17,875
I'm not afraid to use this thing,
you know?
263
00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:19,335
Oh, for heaven's sake.
264
00:15:19,502 --> 00:15:21,838
Allow me. Perhaps I can be
of some assistance.
265
00:15:22,004 --> 00:15:23,840
Carla. Carla, please.
266
00:15:24,215 --> 00:15:29,095
Now listen, just look into my eyes
and listen very carefully to every word I say.
267
00:15:29,303 --> 00:15:33,433
All he's going to do is plunge this
large-bore needle into your tissue
268
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:37,311
until it reaches a vein.
At which point the beating of your heart
269
00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:39,188
will cause your blood
to gush into this vile,
270
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:43,276
filling it with a viscous crimson syrup.
271
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:44,444
Ohh.
272
00:15:45,695 --> 00:15:47,613
There you go. Top her off.
273
00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:49,532
Thank you.
274
00:15:49,699 --> 00:15:50,741
My pleasure.
275
00:15:55,997 --> 00:15:56,831
How you doing, pal?
276
00:15:56,998 --> 00:15:58,291
Oh, I'm fine, Sam.
277
00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:01,043
That nap in the car
on the way over really helped.
278
00:16:01,210 --> 00:16:02,462
I got my second wind.
279
00:16:03,004 --> 00:16:05,006
Woody, good to see you.
280
00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:08,009
Ah, good to see you, too, Mr. Gaines, sir.
281
00:16:08,718 --> 00:16:10,219
How do you do, Mr. Gaines?
I'm Sam--
282
00:16:10,386 --> 00:16:13,222
- No. Don't introduce yourself to me.
- That's right. We met.
283
00:16:13,473 --> 00:16:15,892
No. I just don't care who you are.
284
00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,150
Mmm, mmm.
285
00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:27,862
I see you gentlemen are enjoying
the smoked tongue.
286
00:16:31,741 --> 00:16:32,742
Yecchh!
287
00:16:33,451 --> 00:16:34,744
Look at us, Cliff.
288
00:16:35,244 --> 00:16:39,248
All the years of pretzels and potato chips
at the bar have ruined us.
289
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:42,543
We finally get a chance
to broaden our horizons a bit,
290
00:16:42,710 --> 00:16:44,712
educate our palate.
What do we do?
291
00:16:44,879 --> 00:16:47,548
We act like a couple of bar goons
at a rich man's party.
292
00:16:47,715 --> 00:16:48,841
Hey, Norm.
293
00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:54,722
Woody, I'm so glad
you're here.
294
00:16:54,889 --> 00:16:56,516
Grandmother can't wait
to meet you.
295
00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:59,060
And I can't wait to meet her,
Kelly Gaines.
296
00:17:00,311 --> 00:17:01,729
Is he okay?
297
00:17:01,896 --> 00:17:04,732
Yeah, he's fine. He's just been working
24 hours a day
298
00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:06,692
for the past four days.
299
00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:10,404
Is that a lot?
I'm not part of the work force.
300
00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:14,534
Oh, look, there's grandmother now.
301
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:19,121
- Oh, my God! Sam, save me.
- What? what?
302
00:17:19,372 --> 00:17:21,749
It's Mrs. Jane Vanderhooven,
beloved wife and mother.
303
00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:25,461
- Who?
- The dead woman from last night.
304
00:17:25,628 --> 00:17:28,005
- I could never forget her face.
- Oh, come on, Woody.
305
00:17:28,214 --> 00:17:29,757
I should know. I dug her up three times.
306
00:17:29,924 --> 00:17:32,510
Hey, Woody, Woody, Woody.
Stop it, man. You're hallucinating.
307
00:17:32,677 --> 00:17:34,554
Remember what Frasier said
about lack of sleep?
308
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:35,930
That's her, Sam.
309
00:17:36,097 --> 00:17:38,391
No, Woody, it is Kelly's grandmother.
310
00:17:38,641 --> 00:17:40,643
Check her head for a shovel-shaped dent.
311
00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:43,479
I'm not saying we did it,
but, okay, it was late,
312
00:17:43,646 --> 00:17:45,773
and we got a little careless.
Why are you interrogating me?
313
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:47,066
I'm not on trial here!
314
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:51,612
- You're Woody Boyd, aren't you?
- See, Sam? She remembers me.
315
00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:55,700
Kelly's told me so much about you.
316
00:17:55,866 --> 00:17:57,743
So, you're interested in getting married.
317
00:17:57,910 --> 00:18:01,914
Perhaps you and I should
have a little talk, in private.
318
00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:05,001
That's a good idea.
We should sit down and do that sometime.
319
00:18:05,167 --> 00:18:06,752
Well, no time like the present.
320
00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:08,838
Why don't you join me
in the library?
321
00:18:09,505 --> 00:18:10,631
Right in here.
322
00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:17,930
Tell my parents I loved them.
323
00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:22,435
All right, Cliff ie, I got one. I got one.
324
00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:25,187
Little Orphan Annie.
325
00:18:28,441 --> 00:18:30,318
That's a good one, Normie,
but I didn't see it
326
00:18:30,484 --> 00:18:32,403
'Cause I got cataracts.
327
00:18:34,905 --> 00:18:35,990
Hey, guys. Look at this.
328
00:18:37,491 --> 00:18:40,870
Oh, Sammy, come on. Tongue jokes
were funny like a half hour ago.
329
00:18:42,622 --> 00:18:44,790
Don't just stand there,
young man.
330
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:47,043
Come and sit down
beside me.
331
00:18:56,719 --> 00:18:58,471
Are you cold?
332
00:18:58,638 --> 00:19:00,097
I'm freezing.
333
00:19:00,264 --> 00:19:03,434
I seem to be cold
all the time these days.
334
00:19:04,810 --> 00:19:06,395
Feel my hand.
335
00:19:10,316 --> 00:19:12,026
If you don't mind, I'd rather not.
336
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:16,656
Are you afraid of me,
young man?
337
00:19:17,198 --> 00:19:20,326
What? Me? Scared? You?
338
00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:24,372
Ha ha. Never.
What crazy talk.
339
00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:28,918
Well, I can't think
of any reason
340
00:19:29,085 --> 00:19:32,463
Why a fine young, strong,
healthy young man like you
341
00:19:32,630 --> 00:19:36,175
should be afraid of
a helpless old lady like me,
342
00:19:36,467 --> 00:19:39,553
unless it's because
you tried to bury me alive last night.
343
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:40,846
Aah!
344
00:19:43,015 --> 00:19:44,141
Aah!
345
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:47,561
What are you doing?
346
00:19:47,728 --> 00:19:50,398
I hit her with the shovel,
and she's come back for me.
347
00:19:50,564 --> 00:19:53,567
- What?
- And you fell for it.
348
00:19:55,569 --> 00:19:57,321
Mother, what are you talking about?
349
00:19:58,572 --> 00:20:01,200
I was just having fun
with the young man.
350
00:20:01,367 --> 00:20:04,620
I got the idea when I heard
that he was working in the graveyard.
351
00:20:04,787 --> 00:20:06,580
It was too rich to pass up.
352
00:20:06,747 --> 00:20:09,417
Wait a minute. How did you
find out about that?
353
00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:12,086
Oh, that's the wonderful thing
about a hearing aid.
354
00:20:12,253 --> 00:20:15,464
When you turn it up,
you can hear all kinds of things.
355
00:20:15,631 --> 00:20:18,092
Incidentally, Elliot,
you're out of the will.
356
00:20:20,177 --> 00:20:21,554
Sorry, Elliot.
357
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:26,183
- You mean this is all a joke?
- That's right.
358
00:20:26,350 --> 00:20:28,185
Well, you crazy old--
359
00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:29,520
Woody, what are you doing?
360
00:20:29,687 --> 00:20:31,272
Get him out of here.
361
00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:32,606
Hold it!
362
00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:37,027
This young man...
363
00:20:37,194 --> 00:20:39,363
This young man may be gullible--
364
00:20:39,530 --> 00:20:42,032
Oh, let's be honest, slow.
365
00:20:43,033 --> 00:20:46,078
But he had the backbone
to stand up to me,
366
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:48,706
which no one else in the family
has ever had the courage to do.
367
00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:51,041
I think you're going to be
very good for Kelly.
368
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,461
In fact, I think you're
gonna be good for all of us.
369
00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:57,047
I give you my blessing.
welcome to the family.
370
00:20:57,548 --> 00:20:58,716
Now let's eat.
371
00:21:02,845 --> 00:21:04,305
Can I go to sleep now?
372
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:05,806
Sure.
373
00:21:23,365 --> 00:21:24,825
Say, uh, Rebecca.
374
00:21:25,868 --> 00:21:28,078
For 10 bucks, I'll tell you how to
get even with Carla
375
00:21:28,245 --> 00:21:29,497
for closing you up in the wall.
376
00:21:30,664 --> 00:21:31,665
Okay.
377
00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:36,670
Here's her purse.
378
00:21:36,837 --> 00:21:37,963
Toss it back into the duct.
379
00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:39,340
When she goes in after it,
380
00:21:39,507 --> 00:21:41,050
screw the vent cover back on.
381
00:21:41,217 --> 00:21:42,343
That's a good idea.
382
00:21:43,594 --> 00:21:44,804
Whoo.
383
00:21:45,846 --> 00:21:47,556
Whoa. Wait a minute.
384
00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:49,391
That's my purse.
385
00:21:49,558 --> 00:21:50,559
Oh.
386
00:21:51,185 --> 00:21:52,269
Sorry.
387
00:21:52,770 --> 00:21:53,854
Oh, my God.