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Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
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00:00:04,588 --> 00:00:07,090
Move it, you deadbeats!
We're closing early.
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00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:08,717
Woody, our bartender,
is getting married,
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00:00:08,884 --> 00:00:10,344
and we're all going
to the wedding,
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Go on.
Get the hell out of here.
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If you're still thirsty,
go on over to Bob's.
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Gee, it's nice to
see my cousins again.
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00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:23,065
You know, sitting here
in my dinner jacket,
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00:00:23,232 --> 00:00:25,025
I feel I should
be tossing off
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00:00:25,192 --> 00:00:27,611
brittle Noel Coward
bon mots.
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00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:32,616
Do you know any brittle
Noel Coward bon mots?
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As a matter of fact,
I do. It seems that
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after being told that a very
boring acquaintance of his
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had put a bullet
through his brain,
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Coward said,
"He must have been a remarkable shot."
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Ha ha ha ha!
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Did he often find humor
in the tragedy of others?
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Darling, you're missing
the humor, dear.
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He got his jollies
from massive head trauma?
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You're missing
the whimsy.
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For God's sake Frasier, can you
imagine the state of mind
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that would drive a man
to do something like that?
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Can you picture the
despair he must have felt,
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facing a future in which
any hope or joy
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00:01:04,856 --> 00:01:06,441
seemed utterly impossible?
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I think I can
picture that, dear.
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So what did you clowns
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get the happy couple?
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Well, you know, Carla,
recent surveys show
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there's a lot of wasteful
duplication in wedding gifts.
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Yeah. Everybody gets, like,
you know,
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four toasters,
and four-dozen fondue forks
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They all wind up
sitting in a closet somewhere.
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-So we went for the practical.
- Yeah.
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Ta-da!
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Hey, wait a minute.
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Is that a new
garbage can?
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Yeah.
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Like hell it is.
You just took that
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out of your kitchen
and brought it here.
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00:02:57,844 --> 00:03:00,555
This is a seasoned
receptacle, okay?
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They got some fetish
to look at a brand-new garbage can,
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they can come over
to my kitchen.
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Darling, what's
taking you so long
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00:03:08,939 --> 00:03:10,691
just to write
a simple card?
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00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:12,984
We're the most articulate couple
Woody and Kelly know.
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I'd like to leave them
with some words
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they can re-read and cherish
20 years from now.
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If they're still married then.
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Forgive me if I seem
unduly cynical,
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00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:26,331
but I've treated so many emotionally
scarred husbands and wives,
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it's hard for me
to get sentimental
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over a simple
greeting card.
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What did you write?
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"May you never forget the
way your hearts leapt up
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when first you gazed
into each other's eyes."
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Oh, God, Lilith!
I still remember.
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Whoa, guys,
this is going to be
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some kind of
wedding reception.
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I tell ya, it was pretty nice
of Mr. Gaines
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to buy all his
liquor from us.
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I think I'm going
to throw in
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that special case of
wine I got in here.
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00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:54,192
Sam, you might as well
leave on your apron.
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You're going down
to the cellar.
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Oh, yeah. You're right.
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00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,327
It's all cobwebby
down there.
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00:04:06,288 --> 00:04:08,248
It's a perfectly
sensible precaution.
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00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:11,752
After all, it's not as though
he slept in a shower cap.
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00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:13,253
Well, so what if he did?
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00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:19,676
I mean, like any guy might.
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You know, to keep
the spiders off his head.
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Do you realize
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00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:28,435
when I publish my book
on borderline psychosis,
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every penny I ever spent
in this bar will be deductible?
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I just hope it's a short wedding.
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I can't wait to get to that cake.
I'm starving.
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I gather the preparations for this event
have been somewhat lavish.
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Somewhat?
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We are talking about
the wedding of the year.
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Look at
this guest list--
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Tycoons, Philanthropists,
European royalty.
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The kind of wonderful crowd
that I could be mingling with right now
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if Robin and I
had stayed together,
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which, of course,
we didn't.
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He went his way,
and I went mine,
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00:04:58,423 --> 00:05:00,550
and the dream ended,
and that was that.
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00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,553
And now I've got to go over there
and schlep booze
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00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:06,556
so those rich pigs
can pour it down their ugly throats.
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00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:09,351
Life sucks.
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00:05:10,644 --> 00:05:13,271
Okay to call on you
for a wedding toast?
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00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:20,487
Hey! Here's the
blushing bridegroom now.
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How you doing, Woody?
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Fine. Fine.
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00:05:24,366 --> 00:05:26,493
What you smiling
about there?
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00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,203
Am I smiling, Sam?
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Okay, I'll stop.
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00:05:33,708 --> 00:05:36,211
Well, you're acting all weird.
What's going on?
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00:05:36,378 --> 00:05:39,840
Am I acting weird, Sam?
Okay, I'll stop.
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Yeah.
You're spacing out.
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00:05:42,092 --> 00:05:43,927
You've got that goofy
look on your face
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and that look in your eyes
that that I always get right after--
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Aww... Don't tell me.
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You and Kelly couldn't wait
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00:05:51,142 --> 00:05:53,770
for your wedding night,
could you? Oh!
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Ooh! It's given me a whole
new perspective, Sam.
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Suddenly I understand
all those jokes
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you guys have been
telling me.
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And by the way,
ha ha, Mr. Peterson,
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00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:09,077
and ha ha ha,
Mr. Clavin,
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00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:12,956
and ho ho, shame on you,
Dr. Crane.
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00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:18,503
But tell me, Woody,
Why, after three years of chastity
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and just hours
before the wedding?
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Well, Kelly was modeling
her trousseau,
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and she just
looked so good,
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and we couldn't
help ourselves.
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We figured it's okay.
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As long as we're
getting married today, you know.
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You still respect me,
right, Sam?
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Oh, come on.
You'd still respect me, wouldn't you?
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Let's not open up
that can of worms.
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Ha ha ha!
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Woody, I understand
completely.
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You know, forbidden fruit
is often the sweetest.
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Many men look back
on premarital sex
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as the last real thrill they had
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before the cold,
dead hand of matrimony
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turned what was
once exciting
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into predictable routine.
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According to this
idiotic book I read.
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00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:05,342
I just worry
about Kelly's father.
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He's pretty traditional
about those things.
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- I wouldn't want him finding out.
- Hi, lover.
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Gee, I don't know what
would tip him off.
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Shouldn't you be home
getting dressed?
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Uh-huh, but I missed you.
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Oh, I missed you, too.
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You know, no matter how
often I see it,
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the sight of young lovers
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never fails to make me sick.
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Kelly? Kelly.
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Kelly!
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Look, I gotta
ask you something.
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I'm making you guys
an astrological marriage chart
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for a wedding present,
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and I got to get
some information.
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Oh, gee, I...
I don't know my sign.
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But I know
I'm not a Virgo.
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I know your date of birth
and where you were born,
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00:07:52,555 --> 00:07:55,433
but what I got to know is what time
you were born, exactly.
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It was eight in the morning.
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I weighed seven pounds,
three ounces.
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00:08:00,563 --> 00:08:02,273
I had very fine hair
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00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:04,943
and a tiny little birthmark
on my shoulder.
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00:08:05,110 --> 00:08:07,696
Daddy said it was
the sweetest thing you've ever seen.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Can you believe that sweet,
innocent baby girl
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grew up and got it on
with the Woodman this morning?
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8:00 a.m. Got it. Okay.
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00:08:28,174 --> 00:08:30,510
Kelly, who's performing
the ceremony?
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Don't you have an uncle
who's a minister?
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Yes, Uncle Roger,
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but it didn't seem
right to ask him.
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He's going through
a terrible divorce right now.
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Apparently, he got
tired of coming home
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and finding his wife
in bed with hives.
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That's pretty
insensitive of him.
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- Hives was their butler.
- Oh.
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Oh!
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Oh, bad news, guys.
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The wedding's off.
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What are you talking
about, Carla?
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Well, according to my chart,
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this is the worst possible day
for you guys to get married.
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00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:04,669
If you do, the wedding
will be a disaster.
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00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:07,881
For crying out loud, Carla,
you ought to know by now
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00:09:08,048 --> 00:09:09,591
horoscopes are for suckers.
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00:09:09,758 --> 00:09:11,885
Oh, they're for suckers,
huh, Clavin?
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00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:14,262
Sure. I was reading
an article debunking them
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00:09:14,429 --> 00:09:17,140
in last month's
UFO Spotter's Guide.
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You know, kids,
astrology's bad enough,
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00:09:23,938 --> 00:09:25,899
but she's also a Cassandra
into the bargain,
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always prophesying doom.
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00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,069
You know, when Lilith
and I got married,
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00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:30,653
she predicted
that our marriage
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00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:34,032
would descend
into a life of endless bickering.
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That's not exactly
what she said, Frasier.
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Yes, it is,
word for word.
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00:09:37,368 --> 00:09:39,662
No. You're
misremembering, as usual.
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00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:42,457
It's my story. Why can't
you keep your oar out?
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00:09:42,624 --> 00:09:44,834
Because inaccuracy is a mark
of sloppy thinking.
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00:09:45,001 --> 00:09:46,628
And what is butting in
a mark of?
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00:09:50,381 --> 00:09:52,592
I'm telling you.
Woody, you got to call this thing off.
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00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,928
Just reschedule it for
any other day but this.
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00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:57,597
That's out of the question.
After what happened this morning,
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00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:00,350
Kelly and I have to get married,
or she'll be a fallen woman,
197
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,811
and I'll have brought
disgrace on my whole family,
198
00:10:02,977 --> 00:10:05,522
just like Uncle Orlo when he
got caught checking into a motel
199
00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:08,608
with a cream
separating machine.
200
00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:11,361
It may not seem shocking now,
but in the early sixties,
201
00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:13,363
that was considered
pretty weird.
202
00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:17,826
Nope.
Got to get married today.
203
00:10:17,992 --> 00:10:20,286
Woody's right.
If we don't get married today,
204
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,413
we'll never be able
to face each other.
205
00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:26,292
Okay. Suit yourselves,
but don't blame me.
206
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,253
Come on.
Don't listen to her.
207
00:10:28,419 --> 00:10:29,712
Kelly, we'd better get
you home
208
00:10:29,879 --> 00:10:31,714
so you can get into
that wedding dress.
209
00:10:31,881 --> 00:10:33,383
Come on, you two.
Cut it out.
210
00:10:33,550 --> 00:10:35,718
Otherwise, you're going
to be getting married in
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00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:37,846
nothing but high heels
and a wedding veil,
212
00:10:38,012 --> 00:10:39,597
and how would that look?
213
00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,224
Trust me, Sam.
214
00:10:45,353 --> 00:10:46,980
Oh, that's great.
215
00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:49,232
Okay, Rebecca,
you ready to go?
216
00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:51,234
No, no, no. I want to
get a picture of everybody first
217
00:10:51,401 --> 00:10:52,861
all dressed up.
Come on.
218
00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:54,821
Everybody get over here
on the steps.
219
00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:56,781
It's amazing how
different we all look
220
00:10:56,948 --> 00:10:58,116
when we're dressed up,
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00:10:58,283 --> 00:11:01,202
sort of sophisticated
and debonair.
222
00:11:01,369 --> 00:11:04,664
For crying out loud,
Norm, you stepped on my shoe!
223
00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:06,666
You know how long
it took to get that shine on there?
224
00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:09,627
Did Cliff ie get his
little shoesey wooseys messed up?
225
00:11:09,794 --> 00:11:11,296
Hey! Will you knock it off!
226
00:11:11,462 --> 00:11:14,299
How would you like
a smear on your "triple E's" pal?
227
00:11:14,465 --> 00:11:16,634
Okay, all right.
I've got it set!
228
00:11:16,801 --> 00:11:19,012
In five seconds,
the picture goes off!
229
00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:28,980
Darn it...
I think my eyes were closed.
230
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:48,374
Come on, Carla.
As soon as we're finished setting up,
231
00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:50,210
we can enjoy
the wedding.
232
00:11:50,376 --> 00:11:52,712
I'm telling you, nobody's going to
enjoy this wedding.
233
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:56,257
The stars don't lie.
The day is going to be a disaster.
234
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:59,594
There's going to be carnage,
bloodshed, destruction.
235
00:11:59,761 --> 00:12:02,597
People will be fighting each other
to get on stretchers
236
00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:05,308
and begging to be put
out of their misery.
237
00:12:05,475 --> 00:12:07,769
Carla, if you feel that way,
why didn't you just stay home?
238
00:12:07,936 --> 00:12:09,729
What, and spend the night
with my kids?
239
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:12,607
Whoa!
240
00:12:15,526 --> 00:12:17,362
Whoo! Boy, I tell you,
those are two
241
00:12:17,528 --> 00:12:19,572
of the fiercest guard dogs
I've ever seen.
242
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,574
Mr. Gaines says if you just
call them by name
243
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,743
and speak firmly to them,
they're gentle as lambs.
244
00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:26,079
That's good to know.
What are their names?
245
00:12:26,246 --> 00:12:28,373
Hitler and Attila.
246
00:12:28,539 --> 00:12:31,000
What do you want me
to do with this wine?
247
00:12:31,834 --> 00:12:33,586
Why don't you just put it
over there in the wine closet?
248
00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:34,754
All right.
249
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:36,339
Oh, oh, oh, oh!
250
00:12:36,506 --> 00:12:38,466
Wine closet.
251
00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:45,265
These certainly
look delicious.
252
00:12:46,808 --> 00:12:47,767
Ow!
253
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:49,602
I have told you
again and again,
254
00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:51,062
don't touch the food!
255
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:54,315
I am the caterer.
you are just bar people.
256
00:12:54,482 --> 00:12:56,567
Why are you
being so rude?
257
00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:58,236
We're caterers, too.
258
00:12:58,403 --> 00:12:59,862
Opening a bag
of potato chips
259
00:13:00,029 --> 00:13:01,739
does not make you
a caterer.
260
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:05,451
That is not a bag.
That is a can.
261
00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:06,828
Those are Pringles,
262
00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:09,539
Mr. Big-Time-Know-lt-All Chef.
263
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:13,793
Hey, that's the nicest wine closet
I've ever been in.
264
00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:17,297
Well, Robin and I
were gonna have one too.
265
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,632
It was gonna have stereo,
266
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,968
and hanging plants, and
267
00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:24,762
and two little chairs
and a little table, and
268
00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:28,683
we would sit there late at night
with a very special bottle of wine.
269
00:13:30,018 --> 00:13:32,562
The son-of-a-bitch.
270
00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:35,606
You wanted to talk
to me, Mr. Gaines?
271
00:13:35,773 --> 00:13:38,651
Yes, Woody. Now that
we're almost family,
272
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:41,779
Mr. Gaines sounds
pretty cold and formal.
273
00:13:41,946 --> 00:13:43,156
Dad?
274
00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:46,659
But better than that.
Have a seat here, Woody.
275
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,828
Now, Woody, I don't think
I've ever tried
276
00:13:48,995 --> 00:13:51,497
to hide the fact that
I dislike you intensely.
277
00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:55,960
I appreciate that, sir.
278
00:13:56,127 --> 00:13:58,963
The only reason
I've accepted this union
279
00:13:59,130 --> 00:14:01,924
is that my daughter
loves you so very much.
280
00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:05,803
I know she's had other suitors
with better backgrounds,
281
00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:07,847
but they all had one
thing on their minds.
282
00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:10,892
They couldn't keep their hands off
my little girl, and I hate that.
283
00:14:11,059 --> 00:14:12,477
But you,
on the other hand,
284
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:15,146
have always seemed to respect
and love my daughter.
285
00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:17,648
Believe me, if I thought
for one moment
286
00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:20,401
you didn't respect my Kelly,
I'd call off this wedding
287
00:14:20,651 --> 00:14:23,279
and have those dogs
of mine eat you alive.
288
00:14:24,238 --> 00:14:25,823
Do I make myself clear?
289
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:27,200
Oh, yes, sir.
290
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:29,911
Now, Woody,
I know this sounds
291
00:14:30,078 --> 00:14:32,163
like a meddlesome
father-in-law giving advice,
292
00:14:32,330 --> 00:14:33,164
But it isn't.
293
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:34,791
It's a threat.
294
00:14:38,336 --> 00:14:40,546
I think he's starting
to like me.
295
00:14:41,964 --> 00:14:43,466
Hey, Woody.
296
00:14:43,633 --> 00:14:46,719
Hey. Ah! There's a
good shot right there.
297
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,554
Hey, Rebecca?
298
00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:50,098
Say cheese.
299
00:14:50,264 --> 00:14:51,974
- Oh, man!
- Oh!
300
00:14:52,141 --> 00:14:54,727
Think you got enough wattage
in that thing?
301
00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:56,479
Oh!
302
00:14:56,646 --> 00:14:58,481
Sammy, you're missing
quite a party out there.
303
00:14:58,648 --> 00:14:59,565
What are you talking about?
304
00:14:59,732 --> 00:15:01,359
I thought the reception
was after the wedding.
305
00:15:01,526 --> 00:15:03,194
I know. As soon as he
met Woody's relatives,
306
00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:05,780
Mr. Gaines opened
the bar right away.
307
00:15:07,657 --> 00:15:09,826
We better take some
hors d'oeuvres out there.
308
00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:12,161
I'm not going to
tell you again,
309
00:15:12,328 --> 00:15:14,622
keep your hands
off my savories!
310
00:15:14,789 --> 00:15:18,626
Oh, my. I haven't heard
that since high school.
311
00:15:18,793 --> 00:15:21,421
You have
a real attitude problem,
312
00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:23,339
you know that, you little creep?
313
00:15:24,132 --> 00:15:27,135
Now you're taking me back
to high school.
314
00:15:29,137 --> 00:15:31,806
Yeah...
Teachers, huh?
315
00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:35,101
As long as you two guys
are out here,
316
00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:37,270
why don't you
give me a hand?
317
00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:39,188
Hilarious!
318
00:15:39,355 --> 00:15:41,315
Cliff, dry off
those glasses,
319
00:15:41,482 --> 00:15:43,359
and, Norm, open up
those wine bottles.
320
00:15:43,526 --> 00:15:45,653
Hey, does anybody
have a plunger?
321
00:15:45,820 --> 00:15:47,488
Why? Something happen
to the toilet?
322
00:15:47,655 --> 00:15:49,991
No. My Uncle Elroy
left his leg on the bus,
323
00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:51,909
and he wants to dance.
324
00:15:56,747 --> 00:16:00,042
Yeah, well, if I see it,
I'll send it out there.
325
00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:03,004
Woody. Woody,
for the last time,
326
00:16:03,171 --> 00:16:04,755
will you call this thing off
327
00:16:04,922 --> 00:16:06,048
before disaster strikes?
328
00:16:06,215 --> 00:16:08,009
Carla, I couldn't
even if I wanted to,
329
00:16:08,176 --> 00:16:10,011
now that Kelly's
in a family way.
330
00:16:10,178 --> 00:16:12,013
Family way?
Just from this morning?
331
00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:13,973
Wouldn't surprise me.
332
00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:15,641
Farm boys
know these things.
333
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:17,268
She's got that same glow
334
00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:18,895
we use to see on
the brood sow's snout
335
00:16:19,061 --> 00:16:21,147
after we fed the hogs
fermented swill.
336
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,609
Pretty soon, she'll be
grunting, squealing,
337
00:16:24,775 --> 00:16:26,861
and cranking out
piglets.
338
00:16:27,028 --> 00:16:29,197
Never lose those stars
in your eyes, Wood.
339
00:16:30,114 --> 00:16:31,157
Woody?
340
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:35,036
Oh, Kelly, do you
ever look gorgeous!
341
00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:37,246
Daddy would kill you
if he saw us together
342
00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:38,748
before the wedding.
343
00:16:38,915 --> 00:16:41,042
Oh. Okay, I'll see you later.
344
00:16:41,209 --> 00:16:43,252
See you later, Woody.
345
00:16:44,921 --> 00:16:46,506
Boy, oh, boy, huh?
346
00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:48,508
Looking at those two,
it's hard to believe that
347
00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:50,468
one out of every
two-and-two-thirds of marriages
348
00:16:50,635 --> 00:16:52,720
in this country
ends in divorce.
349
00:16:52,887 --> 00:16:54,847
Where do they get
those stupid statistics?
350
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:56,891
What is tow-thirds of a marriage?
351
00:16:57,058 --> 00:16:58,643
Plenty, believe me.
352
00:17:01,229 --> 00:17:02,730
Hey, come on,
you guys.
353
00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:04,190
You heard Mr. Gaines, Woody.
354
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,025
If he sees you and Kelly
smooching like that,
355
00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:08,069
he's going to throw a fit.
356
00:17:08,236 --> 00:17:09,445
Kelly, where are you?
357
00:17:09,612 --> 00:17:10,947
Carla, give me a
hand here, will you?
358
00:17:11,113 --> 00:17:12,907
I told you disaster
was going to strike.
359
00:17:13,074 --> 00:17:14,408
Woody, out here.
360
00:17:16,202 --> 00:17:18,162
Kelly, you're not
downstairs, are you?
361
00:17:18,329 --> 00:17:19,956
You have to hide her!
362
00:17:20,122 --> 00:17:23,251
Yeah. Out through
the swinging doors.
363
00:17:23,417 --> 00:17:25,378
No, no. Nobody can see her
until she walks down the aisle!
364
00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:26,921
How about the oven?
365
00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:28,381
Carla!
366
00:17:30,258 --> 00:17:31,801
How about
the dumbwaiter?
367
00:17:31,968 --> 00:17:34,971
My cousin and I used to hide
in here when we were little.
368
00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:39,100
Ooh, it's cozy in here.
369
00:17:39,267 --> 00:17:40,268
Woody.
370
00:17:40,434 --> 00:17:42,603
- No. Don't even think about it.
- Kelly?
371
00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:43,521
Kelly?
372
00:17:43,688 --> 00:17:47,191
- Hi, Mr. Gaines.
- Hi, Woody. I can't seem to find Kelly.
373
00:17:55,950 --> 00:17:58,160
She didn't go
out there, did she?
374
00:17:58,327 --> 00:18:00,580
I think she's around
here somewhere.
375
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:04,208
Woody, you haven't
seen Kelly, have you?
376
00:18:04,375 --> 00:18:05,960
No. No, sir.
No, not me.
377
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:07,295
Not before the wedding.
378
00:18:07,461 --> 00:18:09,630
I wouldn't want
to see Kelly naked.
379
00:18:12,008 --> 00:18:13,634
I mean, married.
380
00:18:13,801 --> 00:18:16,345
I mean, I don't believe in seeing--
Or naked marriages--
381
00:18:16,512 --> 00:18:19,390
Or being naked
when you see a marriage...
382
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:22,852
Or any of that stuff,
not even with a veil.
383
00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:26,647
More bourbon, Sam.
384
00:18:27,064 --> 00:18:28,983
- Lots more bourbon.
- Yes, sir.
385
00:18:29,150 --> 00:18:30,484
The big bottles.
386
00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:36,157
Ooh! I couldn't have held
onto that rope much longer.
387
00:18:36,324 --> 00:18:37,700
I don't want to take
any more chances.
388
00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:39,160
You go up to your room, Kelly.
389
00:18:39,327 --> 00:18:40,995
Would you two stop that!
Now, come on!
390
00:18:41,162 --> 00:18:42,330
Woody, Woody, Woody,
get out there,
391
00:18:42,496 --> 00:18:44,498
and mingle with your guests.
392
00:18:44,665 --> 00:18:45,583
See you later, Woody.
393
00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:46,876
Love you.
394
00:18:47,043 --> 00:18:48,169
Love you, too.
395
00:18:48,336 --> 00:18:49,253
Love you more.
396
00:18:49,420 --> 00:18:50,254
No, you don't.
397
00:18:50,421 --> 00:18:51,922
Yes, I do, too.
398
00:18:52,089 --> 00:18:53,924
Love you more than
anything in the whole world.
399
00:18:54,091 --> 00:18:55,468
Wuv you--
400
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:57,219
- I wuv you,
- Wuv you, too, Woody.
401
00:18:57,386 --> 00:19:01,015
Now, you go out there
and mingle with your new in-laws, huh?
402
00:19:03,017 --> 00:19:04,894
Are you a history buff, Sam?
403
00:19:05,061 --> 00:19:06,896
No, sir, I'm not, actually. Why?
404
00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:08,356
I was thinking
about Mussolini.
405
00:19:08,522 --> 00:19:11,567
I know you hear a lot of negative
things about him,
406
00:19:11,734 --> 00:19:14,236
but any man that had
his own son-in-law shot
407
00:19:14,403 --> 00:19:16,030
couldn't have been
all bad.
408
00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:19,450
All right. I think
everything's okay here.
409
00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:22,328
I'll just make sure that
Woody's behaving himself.
410
00:19:24,747 --> 00:19:26,832
Well, hello there.
411
00:19:28,584 --> 00:19:30,086
Can I help you?
412
00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:32,046
I'm cousin Monika.
413
00:19:32,213 --> 00:19:34,757
Oh, well, I'm Uncle Sam.
414
00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:37,635
I need a paper towel.
415
00:19:37,802 --> 00:19:39,762
I'm afraid I spilled
a bit of wine...
416
00:19:39,929 --> 00:19:41,305
Right here.
417
00:19:41,472 --> 00:19:43,015
Oh, really?
It doesn't show.
418
00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,726
It does if you look
closely enough.
419
00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:47,687
Oh, yes. You're right.
That's a beauty.
420
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:50,773
It's too bad you had
to get a stain on it.
421
00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:52,942
Let me have something--
Thank you very much.
422
00:19:53,109 --> 00:19:55,403
Let me get this for you.
423
00:19:55,569 --> 00:19:58,739
You're as gallant
as you are attractive.
424
00:19:58,906 --> 00:20:00,616
Well, I try for an even mix.
425
00:20:00,783 --> 00:20:03,244
Are you part of
the groom's family?
426
00:20:03,411 --> 00:20:04,954
Actually,
I'm the best man.
427
00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:07,665
I'd enjoy being
the judge of that.
428
00:20:10,626 --> 00:20:12,461
This is hardly the time or place.
429
00:20:12,628 --> 00:20:14,088
Of course, under the gift table
430
00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:15,548
in about half an hour
would be all right.
431
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:18,008
There you go. Good as new.
432
00:20:18,175 --> 00:20:19,552
Thank you.
433
00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:24,598
Whoa, w-w-wait a second.
What's your rush?
434
00:20:24,765 --> 00:20:26,976
My husband will be
looking for me.
435
00:20:28,936 --> 00:20:31,188
Can you believe that?
She's married.
436
00:20:31,355 --> 00:20:34,066
She didn't seem to be
a fanatic about it.
437
00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:39,613
Oh, hello, Father.
Can I help you?
438
00:20:39,780 --> 00:20:42,658
I'm Dr. Chatfield.
I'm performing the ceremony.
439
00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,785
I've been retired
so long, I'd forgotten
440
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:46,704
how tiring the preliminaries
can be,
441
00:20:46,871 --> 00:20:49,457
all that handshaking
and yak, yak, yak.
442
00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:50,833
Is there somewhere
I could just sit
443
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,752
and put my feet up
until it's time?
444
00:20:52,918 --> 00:20:54,462
Sure. How about
right over here?
445
00:20:54,628 --> 00:20:56,505
Just keep him out of
my part of the kitchen.
446
00:20:56,672 --> 00:20:58,716
I still have the whole
cake to decorate.
447
00:20:58,883 --> 00:21:00,843
I wish you'd hurry up.
I'm starving to death.
448
00:21:01,010 --> 00:21:02,303
I haven't had a thing
to eat all morning
449
00:21:02,470 --> 00:21:05,556
- except one of those little candies.
- What little candies?
450
00:21:05,723 --> 00:21:07,850
Those little candies shaped like
brides and grooms.
451
00:21:08,976 --> 00:21:11,353
I made these for
the top of the cake!
452
00:21:12,354 --> 00:21:15,441
You bit the head
off my groom.
453
00:21:15,608 --> 00:21:18,319
I'm sorry. I didn't
have any idea that--
454
00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:20,571
This is the last straw.
455
00:21:20,738 --> 00:21:23,073
You've been an irritation
ever since you walked in.
456
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:26,160
Now, I want you
out of here.
457
00:21:27,620 --> 00:21:29,455
No!
458
00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:31,165
I can stay here, too.
459
00:21:31,332 --> 00:21:33,000
I've been working
very hard.
460
00:21:33,167 --> 00:21:36,212
And except for eating the groom,
I've done a damn good job.
461
00:21:38,172 --> 00:21:40,758
If you don't like it,
why don't you just leave?
462
00:21:40,925 --> 00:21:42,718
Very well.
463
00:21:42,885 --> 00:21:44,136
We shall.
464
00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:45,387
Allons-y!
465
00:21:53,687 --> 00:21:55,773
Probably not
the smartest move
466
00:21:55,940 --> 00:21:59,401
for a bunch of guys who've
been handling liver all day.
467
00:22:01,487 --> 00:22:02,905
He left!
468
00:22:03,072 --> 00:22:04,990
Well, you told him to!
469
00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:07,409
Yes, but nobody
ever listens to me.
470
00:22:07,576 --> 00:22:09,328
Why did he have to be
the first one?
471
00:22:10,621 --> 00:22:12,122
Say, is the minister
out here?
472
00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:13,332
They need him
for a photograph.
473
00:22:13,499 --> 00:22:14,333
Right back here.
474
00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:16,794
All the waiters and the chef,
how are we gonna replace them?
475
00:22:16,961 --> 00:22:18,504
Just relax. We can
handle this ourselves.
476
00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:20,256
Oh, really?
How are we going to do that?
477
00:22:20,422 --> 00:22:22,383
We'll just do whatever those clowns
were supposed to do.
478
00:22:22,550 --> 00:22:25,010
Now come on, listen to me.
This is Woody's wedding day.
479
00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:27,555
It's the most important day in his life.
We're not going to spoil it.
480
00:22:27,721 --> 00:22:30,850
Now, we'll just ice the cake
and serve the hors d'oeuvres.
481
00:22:31,016 --> 00:22:32,101
Don't worry about it.
482
00:22:32,268 --> 00:22:34,103
There's no need
to panic.
483
00:22:34,270 --> 00:22:36,355
I think somebody better tell them
to wait on that photograph.
484
00:22:36,522 --> 00:22:37,606
Why is that?
485
00:22:37,773 --> 00:22:39,525
Because the
minister is dead.
486
00:22:47,241 --> 00:22:49,410
Cheers will be back
after these messages.
487
00:23:05,551 --> 00:23:08,762
Dead? He can't be dead.
488
00:23:08,929 --> 00:23:10,431
He just sat down there
to take a little nap.
489
00:23:10,598 --> 00:23:11,682
Frasier, are you sure?
490
00:23:11,849 --> 00:23:12,808
I trained
as a physician.
491
00:23:12,975 --> 00:23:14,018
Believe me, he's dead.
492
00:23:14,184 --> 00:23:15,519
You don't make
that mistake twice.
493
00:23:15,686 --> 00:23:18,314
Oh! The poor old thing.
494
00:23:19,815 --> 00:23:21,483
Would you stop that!
495
00:23:23,277 --> 00:23:24,987
Oh, no. Poor Woody.
496
00:23:25,154 --> 00:23:26,780
There goes the wedding.
497
00:23:26,947 --> 00:23:29,742
Unless one of you
knows an incredible ventriloquist.
498
00:23:29,909 --> 00:23:32,328
Somebody better go tell him.
499
00:23:32,494 --> 00:23:34,455
You're right. Oh, he's just
going to be crushed.
500
00:23:34,622 --> 00:23:37,207
Break it to him
gently, Sam.
501
00:23:37,374 --> 00:23:40,544
Sam? Why am I
the one who's respons--
502
00:23:40,711 --> 00:23:42,838
Hey, Woodrow!
How you doing, man?
503
00:23:43,005 --> 00:23:45,674
Hey, Sam. I just came in
to get my boutonniere.
504
00:23:45,841 --> 00:23:48,218
Ah. He just came
to get his boutonniere.
505
00:23:48,385 --> 00:23:49,720
Oh.
506
00:23:49,887 --> 00:23:51,430
Listen, I didn't get a chance
to thank you guys
507
00:23:51,597 --> 00:23:54,183
for making this
such a wonderful day
508
00:23:54,350 --> 00:23:56,769
and for helping me out
with Kelly's dad.
509
00:23:56,936 --> 00:23:59,438
Aw, well, we'd do anything
we could for you, pal--
510
00:23:59,605 --> 00:24:00,940
Anything humanly possible.
511
00:24:01,106 --> 00:24:03,442
I know you would, Sam.
I knew you all would.
512
00:24:03,609 --> 00:24:06,612
And thank you all.
This is just the...
513
00:24:06,779 --> 00:24:08,864
...greatest day
of my whole life.
514
00:24:09,031 --> 00:24:10,449
Aw... Well, that's terrific.
515
00:24:10,616 --> 00:24:12,660
Say, how would you feel
if we had to cancel it?
516
00:24:12,826 --> 00:24:15,204
What, are you kidding?
517
00:24:15,371 --> 00:24:17,289
No way. Why would we?
518
00:24:17,456 --> 00:24:19,917
I don't know. If, say,
the minister was...
519
00:24:20,084 --> 00:24:20,960
...called away?
520
00:24:21,126 --> 00:24:22,002
Called away.
521
00:24:22,169 --> 00:24:23,629
He's retired, Sam.
522
00:24:23,796 --> 00:24:25,464
That's for sure.
523
00:24:26,006 --> 00:24:28,634
His wife died ten years ago.
He doesn't have any family.
524
00:24:28,801 --> 00:24:30,719
From what I hear, he hardly
has any life at all.
525
00:24:30,886 --> 00:24:32,596
You heard right.
526
00:24:37,643 --> 00:24:40,980
Whereas I have the greatest life
anyone could ask for.
527
00:24:41,146 --> 00:24:44,566
You know, the greatest friends, and...
528
00:24:44,733 --> 00:24:48,570
And I'm going to marry
Kelly in 30 minutes.
529
00:24:48,737 --> 00:24:51,281
I just feel like the luckiest
guy in the whole world.
530
00:24:51,448 --> 00:24:53,325
You sure are, pal.
Bye-bye.
531
00:24:56,203 --> 00:24:58,205
Oh, great!
What are we going to do?
532
00:24:58,372 --> 00:25:00,457
Well, I suppose I should
call the police.
533
00:25:00,624 --> 00:25:02,626
One of us
better tell Mr. Gaines, too.
534
00:25:02,793 --> 00:25:04,628
That would be great.
What are we supposed to do,
535
00:25:04,795 --> 00:25:06,755
throw rice at the hearse?
536
00:25:07,506 --> 00:25:09,174
I'm telling you,
if we tell anybody,
537
00:25:09,341 --> 00:25:11,301
they're just going to cancel
the whole celebration.
538
00:25:11,468 --> 00:25:12,720
Rebecca's right.
539
00:25:12,886 --> 00:25:16,265
A dead body at a wedding
is a bad idea.
540
00:25:16,432 --> 00:25:19,601
Both times we did that
in my family, we regretted it.
541
00:25:21,645 --> 00:25:23,605
Boy, look at him now.
542
00:25:23,772 --> 00:25:27,026
One minute he's here...
Next minute he's gone.
543
00:25:27,192 --> 00:25:29,194
Really makes you think,
doesn't it?
544
00:25:30,612 --> 00:25:31,947
Friendship.
545
00:25:32,114 --> 00:25:34,116
Mortality.
The afterlife.
546
00:25:34,283 --> 00:25:36,285
What's it all about?
547
00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:39,121
That's a nice watch he's wearing.
548
00:25:43,584 --> 00:25:47,171
- No. No, Cliff. No.
- I'm just saying, that's all.
549
00:25:48,297 --> 00:25:49,006
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute. Wait.
550
00:25:49,173 --> 00:25:50,758
Didn't Woody say
something like
551
00:25:50,924 --> 00:25:52,468
this old man didn't
have any friends left?
552
00:25:52,634 --> 00:25:55,554
What harm would it be if we just
didn't tell anybody for a few hours?
553
00:25:55,721 --> 00:25:57,681
What are we going to
do with Father Bye-bye?
554
00:25:57,848 --> 00:25:59,558
Who's going
to perform the ceremony?
555
00:25:59,725 --> 00:26:02,144
Kelly said something about
having an uncle who's a minister.
556
00:26:02,311 --> 00:26:03,812
Uncle Roger.
557
00:26:03,979 --> 00:26:06,273
Great! Okay, Cliff, go find Uncle Roger
and bring him in here.
558
00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:07,524
Roger.
559
00:26:07,691 --> 00:26:09,068
That's what I just said.
560
00:26:09,234 --> 00:26:10,527
Go, go, go, go.
561
00:26:10,694 --> 00:26:12,738
Frasier, go stall
while I send out more drinks.
562
00:26:12,905 --> 00:26:15,574
Norm, Carla,
get the body in the wine cellar.
563
00:26:15,741 --> 00:26:18,118
Rebecca, ice the cake.
564
00:26:18,285 --> 00:26:21,789
Why do I always
get the hard part?
565
00:26:21,955 --> 00:26:24,333
Just do it,
will you, please?
566
00:26:24,500 --> 00:26:26,043
Come on, come on.
Hurry it up.
567
00:26:27,669 --> 00:26:29,088
Can you believe this, Carla?
568
00:26:29,254 --> 00:26:32,216
We're actually putting
a dead body in a wine closet.
569
00:26:32,382 --> 00:26:34,384
Honey, if I had a nickel...
570
00:26:35,135 --> 00:26:38,138
We're lucky Maurice
already left the icing here.
571
00:26:38,305 --> 00:26:39,848
So maybe I can do
this cake.
572
00:26:40,015 --> 00:26:42,434
What am I going to do
about the little figure for the top?
573
00:26:42,601 --> 00:26:43,977
Can't you repair it?
574
00:26:44,144 --> 00:26:45,729
Here. Yeah. Use this.
575
00:26:45,896 --> 00:26:47,272
Sam, that's paté.
576
00:26:47,439 --> 00:26:48,941
You want me to make the
groom's head out of meat?
577
00:26:49,108 --> 00:26:51,527
Why not? It's supposed
to be Woody.
578
00:26:53,695 --> 00:26:55,656
Sammy. Sam...
579
00:26:55,906 --> 00:26:57,616
Uncle Roger.
580
00:26:57,783 --> 00:26:59,701
Oh! Hello, Uncle Roger.
581
00:26:59,868 --> 00:27:02,037
Very pleased to meet you, Sam.
582
00:27:02,204 --> 00:27:06,083
I've heard wonderful
things about you.
583
00:27:06,250 --> 00:27:08,001
Who are you again?
584
00:27:08,168 --> 00:27:09,545
Well, I'm the best man, sir.
585
00:27:09,711 --> 00:27:11,213
We were wondering if you
could help us out here
586
00:27:11,380 --> 00:27:13,090
and perform Kelly
and Woody's wedding.
587
00:27:13,257 --> 00:27:14,758
I'd be flattered.
588
00:27:14,925 --> 00:27:17,010
I love weddings.
589
00:27:17,177 --> 00:27:20,180
They're such
a marvelous young couple.
590
00:27:20,347 --> 00:27:22,391
Do I know them?
591
00:27:25,602 --> 00:27:27,729
Quick.
Black coffee, Norm.
592
00:27:27,896 --> 00:27:30,357
I love black coffee!
593
00:27:30,524 --> 00:27:32,526
Black coffee is marvelous,
594
00:27:32,693 --> 00:27:35,362
but you know what's
even more marvelous?
595
00:27:37,281 --> 00:27:39,032
Here we go.
Here we go.
596
00:27:39,199 --> 00:27:40,868
There we are.
597
00:27:41,034 --> 00:27:43,162
Okay. Uncle Roger,
this is Norm.
598
00:27:43,328 --> 00:27:45,122
He's going to help you
prepare your remarks.
599
00:27:45,289 --> 00:27:49,126
Pleased to meet you. I've heard
marvelous things about you.
600
00:27:49,293 --> 00:27:51,712
Cliff ie, serve
some hors d'oeuvres.
601
00:27:51,879 --> 00:27:53,088
Keep people happy.
Will you?
602
00:27:53,255 --> 00:27:54,339
All right. You got it.
603
00:27:54,506 --> 00:27:56,133
What's taking so long?
604
00:27:56,300 --> 00:27:58,051
Shouldn't the wedding
have started by now?
605
00:27:58,218 --> 00:27:59,678
Well, something
came up, Lilith.
606
00:27:59,845 --> 00:28:01,305
I'm afraid I can't
go into it,
607
00:28:01,471 --> 00:28:03,307
but maybe it would be
a good idea if you went out there
608
00:28:03,473 --> 00:28:05,309
and were to sing and
dance and use some
609
00:28:05,475 --> 00:28:07,352
of your natural talents
to entertain people.
610
00:28:07,519 --> 00:28:09,688
Oh, my God.
Someone died, didn't they?
611
00:28:14,651 --> 00:28:16,528
You can count on me, Sam.
612
00:28:16,695 --> 00:28:20,616
Good heavens!
Death at a wedding. How appalling.
613
00:28:20,782 --> 00:28:22,534
Make 'em laugh
614
00:28:24,828 --> 00:28:26,830
All right. See?
No need to panic.
615
00:28:26,997 --> 00:28:28,332
Everything's under control here.
616
00:28:29,416 --> 00:28:31,335
Du, dort!
617
00:28:31,501 --> 00:28:34,880
Ich glaube Du Bist
der nachdem Ich suche.
618
00:28:35,047 --> 00:28:36,590
Pardon me?
619
00:28:36,757 --> 00:28:38,300
Ich will nicht
dass Du mit meiner Frau flirten.
620
00:28:38,467 --> 00:28:40,636
Frau. That's German.
Anybody speak German?
621
00:28:40,802 --> 00:28:44,348
Just the basics, Sam--
"Lowenbrau, Michelob, bratwurst."
622
00:28:46,350 --> 00:28:48,685
Good, good, good.
Here we go. Here we go.
623
00:28:50,187 --> 00:28:53,982
I wanted to take German...
624
00:28:54,149 --> 00:28:56,151
...in high school...
625
00:28:57,486 --> 00:29:00,572
It really interested me...
626
00:29:00,739 --> 00:29:03,325
But... It conflicted...
627
00:29:03,492 --> 00:29:05,494
...with Driver's Ed.
628
00:29:07,663 --> 00:29:08,664
Anything?
629
00:29:16,713 --> 00:29:18,632
I'm sorry.
I can't help--
630
00:29:18,799 --> 00:29:20,133
I think he's saying he needs
to go to the bathroom.
631
00:29:20,300 --> 00:29:21,927
Oh, I bet you're right.
I'm sorry.
632
00:29:22,094 --> 00:29:24,221
Right through the doors
there, GOLDFINGER.
633
00:29:24,388 --> 00:29:25,681
Dieter?
634
00:29:25,847 --> 00:29:27,808
Du Bist gewarnt
Gewesen!
635
00:29:27,975 --> 00:29:29,851
Hey, how you doing,
Monika?
636
00:29:30,018 --> 00:29:32,938
I'm sorry. Was my husband
being a pest?
637
00:29:33,105 --> 00:29:34,940
Your husband?
Listen, when we met,
638
00:29:35,107 --> 00:29:36,608
I didn't know
you were married,
639
00:29:36,775 --> 00:29:37,776
let alone
to the Kaiser.
640
00:29:37,943 --> 00:29:39,403
Oh, pay no mind.
641
00:29:39,569 --> 00:29:41,154
He's hideously
jealous
642
00:29:41,321 --> 00:29:43,949
for every man
I am even polite to.
643
00:29:44,116 --> 00:29:46,118
Well, maybe you're
just too darn polite.
644
00:29:46,285 --> 00:29:48,870
The reason
I came looking for you, Sam,
645
00:29:49,037 --> 00:29:51,290
is to give you
a little gift.
646
00:29:51,456 --> 00:29:53,125
Oh. Oh, yeah, listen,
647
00:29:53,292 --> 00:29:54,209
you didn't
have to do that.
648
00:29:54,376 --> 00:29:56,837
Consider it
a down payment.
649
00:29:57,004 --> 00:29:58,964
Now,
I have a problem.
650
00:29:59,131 --> 00:30:00,966
My legs are cold.
651
00:30:01,133 --> 00:30:03,802
How do you think
I can warm them up?
652
00:30:03,969 --> 00:30:07,139
Well, if you were a cricket,
you could always rub them together.
653
00:30:07,306 --> 00:30:08,390
Ha ha ha!
654
00:30:08,557 --> 00:30:10,475
Don't tease me, Sam.
655
00:30:10,642 --> 00:30:14,104
I'll be expecting you
unless...
656
00:30:14,271 --> 00:30:16,356
...you need
another incentive.
657
00:30:16,523 --> 00:30:18,358
No, no, no.
No more incentive.
658
00:30:18,525 --> 00:30:20,068
No, no, no.
Thank you very much.
659
00:30:20,235 --> 00:30:22,070
Oh, Lord.
What am I going to do?
660
00:30:24,031 --> 00:30:25,657
Hey, buddy,
how are you doing?
661
00:30:25,824 --> 00:30:27,951
Hey, Sam. I miss her,
and I want to go up and say hi to her.
662
00:30:28,118 --> 00:30:31,079
Can't you keep your hormones
in check just for five minutes?
663
00:30:31,330 --> 00:30:32,831
Look who's talking.
664
00:30:32,998 --> 00:30:34,082
Oh, yeah.
665
00:30:34,249 --> 00:30:35,167
Yeah.
666
00:30:35,334 --> 00:30:36,793
Oh, you got me
there, pal. Ha ha!
667
00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:38,587
Yeah, you be careful.
668
00:30:38,754 --> 00:30:41,381
Sammy, you ought to
see Lilith out there.
669
00:30:41,548 --> 00:30:43,383
She's really
working up a sweat.
670
00:30:43,550 --> 00:30:45,344
Singing, dancing,
doing impressions,
671
00:30:45,510 --> 00:30:47,596
doing everything
but playing the spoons.
672
00:30:47,763 --> 00:30:49,014
I'm cooking.
673
00:30:50,390 --> 00:30:51,767
Give me an A-flat.
674
00:30:53,143 --> 00:30:54,102
Thank you.
675
00:30:54,269 --> 00:30:56,063
When you're smiling
676
00:30:56,229 --> 00:30:57,647
When you're smiling
677
00:30:57,814 --> 00:31:00,192
The whole world
smiles with you
678
00:31:00,359 --> 00:31:02,361
You know, maybe it
wouldn't be so bad
679
00:31:02,527 --> 00:31:05,155
to let them see
the corpse, after all.
680
00:31:05,322 --> 00:31:08,033
Ah, Uncle Roger,
you feeling better?
681
00:31:08,200 --> 00:31:10,285
Well, yes, I am
feeling better.
682
00:31:10,452 --> 00:31:12,245
Are you feeling up to
performing a wedding?
683
00:31:12,412 --> 00:31:14,623
Perform a wedding?
I'd sooner be dead!
684
00:31:14,790 --> 00:31:17,042
Oh, now don't you
get started on us.
685
00:31:17,209 --> 00:31:18,668
I hate weddings!
686
00:31:18,835 --> 00:31:21,838
My own marriage
was a disaster.
687
00:31:22,005 --> 00:31:24,591
At times,
I prayed I would die
688
00:31:24,758 --> 00:31:27,427
and go to a better hell
than the one I was living.
689
00:31:27,594 --> 00:31:29,679
Oh, my...
Talk to him, will you, Norm?
690
00:31:29,846 --> 00:31:32,099
What am I going to do,
argue with the man?
691
00:31:34,059 --> 00:31:36,520
Marriage ruined
my life. Oh, no.
692
00:31:36,686 --> 00:31:38,105
Oh, yes. Oh.
693
00:31:38,271 --> 00:31:40,732
Amen, brother. Amen.
694
00:31:40,899 --> 00:31:42,692
Not now, Cliff ie.
695
00:31:42,859 --> 00:31:43,985
Do me a favor.
696
00:31:44,152 --> 00:31:45,862
Take Uncle Roger out there,
find Frasier,
697
00:31:46,029 --> 00:31:47,072
and get him some
therapy-- Fast.
698
00:31:47,239 --> 00:31:49,032
Sure thing.
Okay, buddy, let's go.
699
00:31:49,199 --> 00:31:50,200
Are you married?
700
00:31:50,367 --> 00:31:52,452
No, sir. Came close once, but no.
701
00:31:52,619 --> 00:31:53,995
She was a lucky girl.
702
00:31:54,162 --> 00:31:55,914
Why, thank you, sir.
703
00:31:56,081 --> 00:31:59,501
What's the holdup?
Where's Dr. Chatfield?
704
00:31:59,668 --> 00:32:02,045
Dr. Chatfield...
705
00:32:02,212 --> 00:32:06,258
...has challenged
the chef and the waiters
706
00:32:06,425 --> 00:32:08,427
to a footrace...
707
00:32:08,593 --> 00:32:10,595
...in the park, and that's
where they are now.
708
00:32:10,762 --> 00:32:12,139
Footracing--
He was going for it.
709
00:32:12,305 --> 00:32:13,682
Thank you very much.
710
00:32:15,308 --> 00:32:17,018
Sir, the minister
will be ready
711
00:32:17,185 --> 00:32:18,186
in about five minutes.
712
00:32:18,353 --> 00:32:19,563
Well then, I'll just use
this opportunity
713
00:32:19,729 --> 00:32:21,022
to get the Champagne
out of the wine closet.
714
00:32:21,189 --> 00:32:22,107
Good idea.
715
00:32:22,274 --> 00:32:24,526
Every "body" loves wine, Rebecca.
716
00:32:24,693 --> 00:32:25,944
Oh! No, no.
717
00:32:26,111 --> 00:32:28,613
Sir. Please, this is
far too dangerous.
718
00:32:28,780 --> 00:32:30,073
Let me go down there
for you.
719
00:32:30,240 --> 00:32:31,658
I'm just going to
select a vintage.
720
00:32:31,825 --> 00:32:34,494
Rebecca, can you sew
a button on for me?
721
00:32:34,661 --> 00:32:37,038
What are you doing down
here in the kitchen?
722
00:32:37,205 --> 00:32:40,375
Now that you're here,
let me get a look at you.
723
00:32:40,542 --> 00:32:42,252
Oh, yes, yes.
Let's all look at her.
724
00:32:42,419 --> 00:32:45,380
Kelly, you stand right
over there by the paté.
725
00:32:45,547 --> 00:32:48,049
Oh! isn't she beautiful?
726
00:32:48,216 --> 00:32:49,509
Yeah...
727
00:32:49,676 --> 00:32:51,678
Yes, yes. I'm just
a bartender,
728
00:32:51,845 --> 00:32:53,638
but even a
"dumbwaiter" like me
729
00:32:53,805 --> 00:32:55,056
can see how
beautiful she is.
730
00:32:55,223 --> 00:32:57,058
Oh! Look at her.
Turn around, Kelly.
731
00:32:57,225 --> 00:32:59,436
Look at that dress.
732
00:32:59,603 --> 00:33:02,147
Look at that hair.
733
00:33:02,314 --> 00:33:04,733
Look at that train.
734
00:33:04,900 --> 00:33:08,778
Well, you're just a little
store-bought princess, aren't you?
735
00:33:11,323 --> 00:33:12,657
Oh, Cliff ie,
Cliff ie!
736
00:33:12,824 --> 00:33:14,159
You're just in time.
737
00:33:14,326 --> 00:33:15,660
The bride and her
father would like
738
00:33:15,827 --> 00:33:17,120
to have a shot
before the wedding.
739
00:33:17,287 --> 00:33:18,955
Yup. Sure thing there, Sammy.
740
00:33:19,122 --> 00:33:21,208
Okay. Now,
just look at me.
741
00:33:21,374 --> 00:33:22,209
Just look at Cliff.
742
00:33:22,375 --> 00:33:24,377
I already hired
a professional photographer.
743
00:33:24,544 --> 00:33:26,922
I know, but spontaneous
is so much more fun. Smile!
744
00:33:27,088 --> 00:33:28,256
Oh!
745
00:33:30,050 --> 00:33:32,677
Coming through, sir.
Coming through.
746
00:33:32,844 --> 00:33:35,180
Here we go. Let's get
another one this way.
747
00:33:35,347 --> 00:33:36,306
Good idea.
748
00:33:36,515 --> 00:33:37,849
Spin right around here,
749
00:33:38,058 --> 00:33:39,809
and we'll get a picture
of your baby blues.
750
00:33:39,976 --> 00:33:42,437
Oh! You blinded me with
that damn flashbulb again!
751
00:33:42,687 --> 00:33:43,980
Will you be reasonable!
752
00:33:44,147 --> 00:33:46,525
I tell you,
I won't perform another wedding!
753
00:33:46,816 --> 00:33:48,443
What the devil was that?
754
00:33:48,610 --> 00:33:50,237
Maybe it was
the radio.
755
00:33:50,403 --> 00:33:52,197
Oh, yeah. Turn off
that damn radio!
756
00:33:52,364 --> 00:33:53,657
I've got a
splitting headache.
757
00:33:53,823 --> 00:33:54,824
I'm going to go upstairs
and lie down.
758
00:33:54,991 --> 00:33:56,660
No, sir. You got
to pick a vintage
759
00:33:56,826 --> 00:33:58,411
so we can
drink Champagne.
760
00:33:58,578 --> 00:34:00,413
Do you eat a lot
of sugar, Sam?
761
00:34:00,580 --> 00:34:02,874
No, sir. I'm just
a fool for weddings.
762
00:34:03,041 --> 00:34:04,626
What are you doing,
dressed like that!
763
00:34:04,793 --> 00:34:06,461
Come on, Mr. Gaines could
see you. Get out.
764
00:34:08,380 --> 00:34:11,341
I still need to have
my button sewed on.
765
00:34:11,508 --> 00:34:14,803
Woody was kidding around,
and he kind of bit it off.
766
00:34:14,970 --> 00:34:16,596
Where is the button, Kelly?
767
00:34:16,763 --> 00:34:17,722
Woody has it.
768
00:34:17,889 --> 00:34:19,432
I got it. Woody!
769
00:34:21,434 --> 00:34:23,061
Oh, my God!
770
00:34:23,228 --> 00:34:25,564
Give me the button.
There you go.
771
00:34:27,274 --> 00:34:29,609
Here, Rebecca.
Sew it on quick.
772
00:34:29,776 --> 00:34:31,444
Sam, I'm icing the cake,
if I weren't icing the cake,
773
00:34:31,611 --> 00:34:33,405
if I weren't icing the cake,
I would sew on the damn button,
774
00:34:33,572 --> 00:34:34,573
but I'm icing the cake.
775
00:34:34,739 --> 00:34:36,533
You don't know how
to sew, do you?
776
00:34:36,700 --> 00:34:39,077
I don't even know
how to ice a damn cake!
777
00:34:40,996 --> 00:34:42,789
I can sew.
778
00:34:44,124 --> 00:34:45,709
Ma thought
it was a skill
779
00:34:45,875 --> 00:34:47,294
every young man
should learn.
780
00:34:47,460 --> 00:34:49,379
Oh, that was very
sensible of her.
781
00:34:49,546 --> 00:34:52,591
Oh, sure. I can also knit,
crochet, and do bargello.
782
00:34:52,757 --> 00:34:55,051
You ought to see this
petit point rug I did
783
00:34:55,218 --> 00:34:57,721
of John Wayne
ascending into Heaven.
784
00:35:01,474 --> 00:35:03,852
Big dogs... Big ugly dogs.
785
00:35:04,019 --> 00:35:05,478
Thank God I'm safe.
786
00:35:05,729 --> 00:35:07,731
Sam. Here we are.
787
00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:10,900
That's quite a pair of dogs
you've got there, sir.
788
00:35:11,067 --> 00:35:12,736
This ought to do it.
789
00:35:12,902 --> 00:35:14,904
- Put those on ice for later.
- On ice, sir. Yes, sir.
790
00:35:15,071 --> 00:35:16,781
I wonder how Lileth is doing out there.
791
00:35:16,948 --> 00:35:18,950
This time, just the women yodel.
792
00:35:24,039 --> 00:35:26,666
- Way to go, Mr. Best Man.
- Thank you very much.
793
00:35:26,833 --> 00:35:28,501
My pants are torn.
794
00:35:28,668 --> 00:35:31,254
I'm sorry, Woody.
Kelly's father was down here.
795
00:35:31,421 --> 00:35:34,549
Listen, why don't you run up to her room.
Cliff ie's sewing on a button for her.
796
00:35:34,716 --> 00:35:36,217
Maybe he can take
care of your pants.
797
00:35:36,384 --> 00:35:37,886
You'd think those dogs
would know me by now.
798
00:35:38,053 --> 00:35:41,056
Mr. Gaines is always giving them
one of my shoes to sniff.
799
00:35:42,641 --> 00:35:44,100
Quick, quick.
Haul him up.
800
00:35:44,267 --> 00:35:47,312
Okay. If we can get the body
in the wine cellar
801
00:35:47,479 --> 00:35:49,814
and Frasier to fix Uncle Roger
802
00:35:49,981 --> 00:35:51,358
and Rebecca to fix the cake
803
00:35:51,524 --> 00:35:53,526
and Lilith
to entertain the guests
804
00:35:53,693 --> 00:35:56,655
and Cliff ie to fix Woody's pants,
then we'll be all set.
805
00:35:56,821 --> 00:35:58,990
Sammy, I hate to be the one
to break this to you,
806
00:35:59,157 --> 00:36:02,077
but the body seems
to have fallen off the dumbwaiter.
807
00:36:02,243 --> 00:36:05,830
Oh, gee. Just when everything
was going so well.
808
00:36:21,179 --> 00:36:23,056
The body's gone, Sam.
809
00:36:23,223 --> 00:36:26,226
We're just going to have
to find it before somebody else does.
810
00:36:26,393 --> 00:36:29,020
"Horoscopes are for suckers, Carla."
811
00:36:29,187 --> 00:36:31,648
Does anyone know where
this dumbwaiter goes?
812
00:36:31,815 --> 00:36:33,066
The cellar, I think.
813
00:36:33,233 --> 00:36:35,235
Robin and I were
going to have one
814
00:36:35,402 --> 00:36:37,153
right off the kitchen
by the inglenook
815
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:39,197
with little leaded
glass windows
816
00:36:39,364 --> 00:36:41,825
overlooking
the little herb garden.
817
00:36:43,910 --> 00:36:45,954
I'd love it
if he were dead.
818
00:36:47,539 --> 00:36:49,499
Okay. Tell you what.
Go outside there.
819
00:36:49,666 --> 00:36:52,335
See if you can the find entrance
to the cellar.
820
00:36:52,502 --> 00:36:53,628
No problem, Sammy.
821
00:36:54,963 --> 00:36:56,172
Problem, Sammy.
822
00:36:56,339 --> 00:36:58,883
All right,
all right, plan "B."
823
00:36:59,050 --> 00:37:01,136
Somebody climb
in the dumbwaiter,
824
00:37:01,302 --> 00:37:02,512
and I'll lower you down.
825
00:37:02,679 --> 00:37:04,472
Okay.
Okey-doke.
826
00:37:04,639 --> 00:37:08,476
No! Just a thought,
but maybe Carla should go.
827
00:37:08,643 --> 00:37:10,061
Oh, sure, sure.
828
00:37:10,228 --> 00:37:12,230
I'd love to be lowered
down into the cellar on a rope
829
00:37:12,397 --> 00:37:14,274
to look for a dead body
in the dark.
830
00:37:14,441 --> 00:37:17,277
Who believes
in horoscopes?
831
00:37:17,444 --> 00:37:19,028
Are you there yet?
832
00:37:19,195 --> 00:37:20,196
No. A little more!
833
00:37:20,363 --> 00:37:21,698
Hello, Uncle Sam.
834
00:37:21,865 --> 00:37:22,782
Aah!
835
00:37:25,869 --> 00:37:28,079
As long as
you have my stockings,
836
00:37:28,246 --> 00:37:31,458
I thought you might need
something to hold them up.
837
00:37:31,624 --> 00:37:33,126
Oh, gee. I wish...
838
00:37:33,293 --> 00:37:34,544
Not now, not now.
839
00:37:34,711 --> 00:37:36,671
No, this is wrong.
840
00:37:36,838 --> 00:37:40,216
Listen, this is my buddy's wedding today.
I can't spoil it.
841
00:37:40,383 --> 00:37:44,012
Besides, I have certain moral standards
that I just refuse to compromise.
842
00:37:44,179 --> 00:37:45,305
Right after the wedding,
843
00:37:45,472 --> 00:37:49,392
my poor husband has
to fly to Dusseldorf.
844
00:37:49,559 --> 00:37:52,395
Okay, but I'm buying breakfast.
845
00:37:56,274 --> 00:37:58,151
I don't feel good about this.
846
00:37:58,318 --> 00:38:01,529
But I've felt
a lot worse before.
847
00:38:01,696 --> 00:38:03,406
Carla, honey!
I'm sorry!
848
00:38:03,573 --> 00:38:05,074
That wasn't funny, Sammy!
849
00:38:05,241 --> 00:38:06,326
Have you got the body?
850
00:38:06,493 --> 00:38:07,619
Yes. Now pull us up!
851
00:38:07,786 --> 00:38:08,953
All right.
Here we come.
852
00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:11,581
Here we go.
I see you.
853
00:38:11,748 --> 00:38:12,999
What are you doing, Sam?
854
00:38:13,166 --> 00:38:14,334
Ooh.
Aah!
855
00:38:15,919 --> 00:38:18,004
Nothing, nothing. Why?
856
00:38:18,171 --> 00:38:19,798
I need a bandage
for Mr. Clavin.
857
00:38:19,964 --> 00:38:21,674
He pricked his finger
sewing my button on,
858
00:38:21,841 --> 00:38:23,635
and he's being
a real baby about it.
859
00:38:23,802 --> 00:38:27,388
Apparently, his mother used to tell him
bedtime stories about gangrene.
860
00:38:28,932 --> 00:38:30,016
Carla! Honey--
861
00:38:30,183 --> 00:38:31,810
No, no, no!
I'm not listening!
862
00:38:31,976 --> 00:38:35,355
Roger, please!
I'm a psychiatrist. You're a minister.
863
00:38:35,522 --> 00:38:36,898
We're both
professional men.
864
00:38:37,065 --> 00:38:39,108
We're in the business
of helping people.
865
00:38:39,275 --> 00:38:41,194
Don't make me hit you!
866
00:38:41,361 --> 00:38:43,363
I am not going
near that wedding!
867
00:38:43,530 --> 00:38:45,740
Sam, I give up.
I've tried every known therapy.
868
00:38:45,907 --> 00:38:48,117
This man is beyond the help
of medical science.
869
00:38:48,284 --> 00:38:49,452
I don't understand this.
870
00:38:49,619 --> 00:38:51,913
He was perfectly happy
when he was drunk.
871
00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:53,414
Calling Dr. Daniels,
872
00:38:53,581 --> 00:38:55,500
Dr. Jack Daniels.
873
00:38:59,504 --> 00:39:01,422
Carla! Sweetheart,
I'm sorry.
874
00:39:01,589 --> 00:39:03,216
You are a dead man,
Malone!
875
00:39:03,383 --> 00:39:06,344
I'm sorry, honey.
I'm going to pull you up right now.
876
00:39:06,511 --> 00:39:08,137
You want to give me
a hand here, Norm?
877
00:39:08,304 --> 00:39:10,306
No, no, no, no.
With the body.
878
00:39:10,473 --> 00:39:12,475
I gotta get the minister
into the wine closet.
879
00:39:12,684 --> 00:39:15,728
This guy didn't move around that much
when he was alive.
880
00:39:15,895 --> 00:39:17,730
I'm sorry, sweetheart.
881
00:39:17,897 --> 00:39:19,732
Oh, no, don't
apologize, Sammy.
882
00:39:19,899 --> 00:39:23,361
Dropping me was funny,
and then the second time was hysterical,
883
00:39:23,528 --> 00:39:25,697
and then this third time--
884
00:39:25,864 --> 00:39:26,948
Aah!
885
00:39:27,365 --> 00:39:28,741
Aah!
886
00:39:30,159 --> 00:39:31,411
Du! Ich habe Dich gewarnt!
887
00:39:31,578 --> 00:39:33,538
Nun wirst
Du dafuer bezahlen!
888
00:39:33,705 --> 00:39:35,665
Frasier, do you speak German?
889
00:39:35,832 --> 00:39:38,793
Ich werde Dich multilieren wie
ein gefeseltes Schwein!
890
00:39:38,960 --> 00:39:42,171
I picked up a smattering
during med school, but it's been so long.
891
00:39:42,338 --> 00:39:44,757
I did recognize the word
"mutilate," though.
892
00:39:44,924 --> 00:39:49,178
Das ist nicht alles was Ich
abschlagen werde!
893
00:39:49,345 --> 00:39:51,347
He speaks too fast
for me, but I can tell you this--
894
00:39:51,514 --> 00:39:52,557
He's clearly insane!
895
00:39:53,182 --> 00:39:54,309
Good with a sword, though.
896
00:39:54,475 --> 00:39:56,519
Tell him I didn't touch his wife.
897
00:39:56,686 --> 00:39:57,604
Bitte.
898
00:39:57,770 --> 00:39:59,522
Es ist ein Fehler.
899
00:39:59,689 --> 00:40:00,940
Dieserist der falsche Mann.
900
00:40:01,107 --> 00:40:02,984
- Der falshce Mann?
- Ja.
901
00:40:03,151 --> 00:40:05,778
Oh, good. Now please,
tell him to put his sword away.
902
00:40:05,945 --> 00:40:10,116
Er ist unschuldig.
Tut ihm night weh.
903
00:40:10,533 --> 00:40:12,911
Oh, thank you, Frasier. Whew!
904
00:40:13,077 --> 00:40:16,247
I tell you-- I thought
I was a dead man for sure.
905
00:40:16,414 --> 00:40:17,457
Du Schmutiziges Schwein!
906
00:40:17,624 --> 00:40:19,584
No! No, no.
These are mine!
907
00:40:19,751 --> 00:40:21,669
Yeah, see, I-- Surgical condition.
908
00:40:21,836 --> 00:40:23,254
Poor circulation.
909
00:40:23,421 --> 00:40:24,964
Yeah. Oh, oh,
that feels much better.
910
00:40:25,131 --> 00:40:27,675
You know, actually,
that does feel better.
911
00:40:32,388 --> 00:40:34,349
Er ist bestimmt
der falsche Mann.
912
00:40:34,515 --> 00:40:36,225
Er ist ein "Poofter."
913
00:40:37,936 --> 00:40:39,771
Well, I tried to tell you.
914
00:40:39,938 --> 00:40:41,439
Ein "Poofter."
915
00:40:41,606 --> 00:40:44,609
Hoert Alle, der beste Mann
ist ein "Poofter."
916
00:40:44,776 --> 00:40:46,069
Ha ha ha ha!
917
00:40:46,235 --> 00:40:47,820
Ich bein 'Poofter."
918
00:40:47,987 --> 00:40:50,448
Ein "Poofter!" Ha ha ha ha!
919
00:40:50,615 --> 00:40:52,867
What's a Poofter mean, anyway?
920
00:40:53,034 --> 00:40:54,619
It means you'll never
have to worry about
921
00:40:54,786 --> 00:40:55,912
the German draft board.
922
00:40:56,079 --> 00:40:58,081
Lord. At the very least,
923
00:40:58,247 --> 00:41:01,084
I thought I'd get the living daylights
kicked out of me.
924
00:41:01,250 --> 00:41:03,586
The night is young.
925
00:41:03,753 --> 00:41:04,754
Aah!
926
00:41:06,214 --> 00:41:07,715
Sammy, you're going to have to
927
00:41:07,882 --> 00:41:09,008
let her out of there
sooner or later.
928
00:41:09,175 --> 00:41:11,052
Yeah, later.
Much, much later.
929
00:41:11,219 --> 00:41:13,262
For crying out loud.
930
00:41:13,429 --> 00:41:14,764
72 million dollars
931
00:41:14,931 --> 00:41:17,308
and they can't afford
a bottle of Bactine.
932
00:41:17,475 --> 00:41:19,686
I'll tell you,
if I lose this finger,
933
00:41:19,852 --> 00:41:22,689
this house and everything in it
is going to belong to me.
934
00:41:22,897 --> 00:41:26,025
Just remind me to call my attorney
after the wedding.
935
00:41:26,192 --> 00:41:28,528
Wedding?
I love weddings!
936
00:41:30,363 --> 00:41:32,949
In that case, how would you like
to perform the ceremony?
937
00:41:33,116 --> 00:41:35,076
I can do
better than that.
938
00:41:35,243 --> 00:41:37,620
I will perform
the ceremony!
939
00:41:40,456 --> 00:41:41,833
So, where's Woody,
anyway?
940
00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:43,543
He's upstairs
with Kelly.
941
00:41:43,710 --> 00:41:46,004
I was beginning to feel
like a third wheel.
942
00:41:46,170 --> 00:41:48,923
You want to give me
a hand here?
943
00:41:49,090 --> 00:41:52,135
Why are we the only people
who find that funny?
944
00:41:53,636 --> 00:41:56,055
Well, all right, Roger.
Shall we get going then?
945
00:41:56,222 --> 00:41:58,725
Not so fast!
946
00:41:58,891 --> 00:42:01,477
Can't I get a chance
to kiss the bride?
947
00:42:01,644 --> 00:42:05,481
No, no. Plenty of time
for that after the wedding.
948
00:42:05,648 --> 00:42:08,401
You know,
I'm somewhat sloshed.
949
00:42:08,568 --> 00:42:11,070
Ha ha! Well, it'll be
our little secret.
950
00:42:11,237 --> 00:42:12,989
Yes, it will.
951
00:42:13,156 --> 00:42:16,534
Quick-- I need a blindfold
and three sharp cleavers.
952
00:42:18,536 --> 00:42:20,538
Lilith, you don't need that.
The wedding's about to begin.
953
00:42:20,705 --> 00:42:22,874
Like hell. Not before
my big finish.
954
00:42:27,253 --> 00:42:29,964
Okay. Looks like we're
all set. Where's Woody?
955
00:42:30,131 --> 00:42:33,342
Oh, God. He's upstairs with Kelly,
working up another smile.
956
00:42:33,509 --> 00:42:35,762
Finally we seem to be ready
to start the wedding.
957
00:42:35,928 --> 00:42:36,929
I'll go upstairs and get Kelly.
958
00:42:37,096 --> 00:42:38,139
No, no. Mr. Gaines--
959
00:42:38,306 --> 00:42:40,183
Sam, you get Woody.
Let's do it.
960
00:42:40,349 --> 00:42:43,186
You go upstairs, Mr. Gaines,
to Kelly's room!
961
00:42:43,352 --> 00:42:46,564
Please! You're yelling loud
enough to wake the dead.
962
00:42:46,731 --> 00:42:49,067
Oh, yeah.
If only I could.
963
00:42:49,275 --> 00:42:50,943
Do you think there's
any way for him
964
00:42:51,110 --> 00:42:52,695
to get out
of that bedroom?
965
00:42:52,862 --> 00:42:55,239
He could always jump out the window
and come to the back door.
966
00:42:56,657 --> 00:42:57,575
Maybe this is him.
967
00:43:04,457 --> 00:43:07,460
Whoo! I wonder what put
the fear into those dogs.
968
00:43:07,627 --> 00:43:09,337
Oh, mayday.
969
00:43:12,882 --> 00:43:15,593
It's pay day!
970
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:17,553
No, no. Honey!
Please, sweetheart.
971
00:43:17,720 --> 00:43:20,223
You stand still
and take it like a man!
972
00:43:20,389 --> 00:43:21,474
I never fight
with women,
973
00:43:21,641 --> 00:43:23,142
especially ones
who could cream me!
974
00:43:23,309 --> 00:43:26,229
Stop it! I just finished
icing the cake!
975
00:43:26,395 --> 00:43:28,856
- Someone could get hurt by accident!
- It won't be an accident!
976
00:43:29,023 --> 00:43:32,235
No, Carla, don't!
Carla, please!
977
00:43:32,401 --> 00:43:35,363
Attention, everyone.
Here comes the bride.
978
00:43:35,530 --> 00:43:38,449
Oh, Mr. Gaines,
you must be so proud.
979
00:43:46,916 --> 00:43:48,835
Woody, that was close.
980
00:43:49,001 --> 00:43:52,130
Boy, now I'm really going
to have to marry her today.
981
00:43:52,296 --> 00:43:55,258
Okay, buddy, you ready
to go out there?
982
00:43:55,424 --> 00:43:56,259
I'm ready, Sam.
983
00:43:56,425 --> 00:43:57,468
All right. Here we go.
984
00:43:57,635 --> 00:43:59,762
Wood, before you
go out there,
985
00:43:59,929 --> 00:44:02,431
there's something
I'd like to give you, that
986
00:44:02,598 --> 00:44:05,393
I wish someone had given
to me on my wedding day.
987
00:44:05,560 --> 00:44:07,019
Cliff ie, you wanna hold him, please.
988
00:44:07,186 --> 00:44:08,855
No, no, no. No!
989
00:44:09,021 --> 00:44:11,440
It's okay, Mr. Peterson.
I really love her.
990
00:44:11,607 --> 00:44:15,027
Okay. Just don't come
complaining to me in ten years,
991
00:44:15,194 --> 00:44:17,780
although you will know
where to find me, won't you?
992
00:44:17,947 --> 00:44:19,157
Turn around here.
993
00:44:19,323 --> 00:44:21,868
Oh, man.
I'm so proud of you.
994
00:44:22,034 --> 00:44:23,703
Thanks, Sam.
Thank you very much.
995
00:44:23,911 --> 00:44:25,246
Come on, come on.
996
00:44:26,998 --> 00:44:29,292
You see, Carla?
You were wrong.
997
00:44:29,458 --> 00:44:31,711
Oh, sure, it could have
turned out to be a disaster,
998
00:44:31,878 --> 00:44:34,714
but we all worked together,
and we got everything done.
999
00:44:34,881 --> 00:44:36,382
You know what?
1000
00:44:36,549 --> 00:44:40,219
I think this wedding's going to
turn out just fine.
1001
00:44:40,386 --> 00:44:43,055
Just fine...