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Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
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Hey, Cliff ie.
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Hey, Sam.
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What are you doing
standing out in the rain?
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It's good for the skin.
Negative ions. Keeps it soft.
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What did you say to Carla, Cliff ie?
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Called her a dwarf.
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Oh.
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Could you untie me,
Sam?
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Yeah, sure.
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Thanks.
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Whoa, whoa. Wait a second.
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How much more time
you got out here?
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Five minutes.
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I'm sorry, buddy. I can't do it.
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She'd have me standing
right out here next to you.
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I understand, Sam.
I understand. No hard feelings.
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Attention, everybody.
I have an announcement to make.
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Thanksgiving is in a few days.
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I know that some of you won't be able
to spend it with your families.
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So anybody who doesn't have
anyplace to go on Thanksgiving
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is welcome to come
to my apartment.
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I thought that would
be a nice gesture.
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How'd you like to see
another nice gesture?
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Carla Tortelli
graciously accepts.
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How about you, Sam?
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Yeah. I think it would be fun to go
to Thanksgiving dinner at your place.
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- Oh, great.
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I really think I can put together
a great Thanksgiving dinner.
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This'll be the second one that I've cooked,
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and believe me,
the first one was not the disaster
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that my family said it was.
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Those kids had a pretty good time
in that ambulance.
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It was exciting for them.
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I mean, at least it wasn't
the same old, same old.
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Wait a second.
Did you say Thanksgiving?
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Oh, shoot. See, I usually
spend Thanksgiving
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with my old Army buddies.
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Sam, you weren't in the Army.
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No, no,
but my buddies were.
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I'd invite you all
over to my place,
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but Ma's down in Florida
working on her tan.
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Yeah, she's got this standing rule,
if she's not around,
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I'm not allowed to bring any more than
two friends over at a time.
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Please, she's never going to know.
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Yes, she will, Norm.
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Why don't we have Thanksgiving dinner
here at Cheers?
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- Potluck, huh?
- Why here?
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Because you don't think I can
handle the responsibility
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of making a big dinner
for everybody?
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Well, I was going to
beat around the bush a little bit,
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but, yeah, that's the gist.
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Well, if you're going to have it,
can we have a turkey?
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I was just going to make
grilled cheese.
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All right, we'll have a turkey. Good idea.
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Okay, who's in
on the dinner here?
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Count me in.
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All right.
Frase, what about you?
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You probably have other plans,
don't you?
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Oh, yes. Big plans.
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Frederick and I will
be spending the day
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with the new friends we've made
since Lilith's departure.
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Mrs. Paul...
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Dinty Moore.
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Uncle Ben.
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Oh, and maybe the Stouffers will stop by.
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Why don't you join us?
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Aw, thanks, Sam.
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Ah, Mr. Gaines,
what a nice surprise.
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You remember Mr. Peterson,
Mr. Clavin?
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Nick, Clyde.
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Actually, it's Norm, Cliff.
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You're lucky I got that close.
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Now, Woody, the reason I came by here
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is that now that
you're my son-in-law,
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I need your signature
on some papers here.
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- What are they?
- It's nothing important.
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Just some silly forms
giving me power of attorney
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over all of your affairs.
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You see, the Gaines' Estate
is wide and varied,
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and now that you're
married to Kelly,
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you're part of that estate.
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I'm not sure I understand all this.
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Let me put it
in Hanoverese, Woody.
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You know how a turkey,
when it feeds at the trough,
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will eat until it dies?
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Well, these forms
give me the right,
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now that you're feeding
at the Gaines' trough,
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to pull your head away if
I think you're going to choke.
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Well, turkeys don't choke, Mr. Gaines.
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They explode.
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The one clue you get is you hear
this hissing sound just before they blow.
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Now, you hear
a turkey hissing,
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head for the hills.
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Turkey shrapnel can kill you.
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For God's sakes, Woody,
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just sign or make your mark
or whatever it is you do.
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Thank you, Woody.
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Oh, wait, uh, Mr. Gaines...
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I just got paid today,
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and, if I'm now part
of the Gaines' Estate,
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I guess I should do my part
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and throw my paycheck
into the pot.
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Good, Woody.
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Always leave them laughing.
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Why do you let him
talk to you like that?
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Yeah, you got to
stand up to him, Wood.
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I'd never let my father-in-law
take advantage of me that way.
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I thought your father-in-law
was dead, Norm.
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You know... he might be.
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Haven't seen him in ages.
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Come to think of it, I do remember Vera
left a note on the refrigerator one night.
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Something about
a funeral.
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Shoot. This is going to drive me crazy.
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You know, Sam,
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I always wanted
to get along with Mr. Gaines
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like I did with my dad.
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You and your daddy
got along well, huh?
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Oh, yeah. Oh...
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We'd go fish and bowl
and hang around...
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Pass notes to each other in class.
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Woody, you know,
it's none of my business,
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but I think you ought
to stand up to Mr. Gaines right now,
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or he's gonna be walking
all over you the rest of your life.
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Well, I'd like to
stand up to him, Sam,
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but he scares me.
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I know. He's a pretty intimidating guy.
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But the way around that
is you figure out what you're gonna say,
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get it in your head
all straight,
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and then you go over there
and tell him.
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What would you say,
Sam?
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Me?
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Oh, well, I don't know.
something like, uh...
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You know,
I'm disappointed in you.
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You should be ashamed of yourself,
you know?
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Things are gonna be
different from now on.
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You're gonna give me
the respect I deserve.
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Gee, I always thought
I did respect you, Sam.
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Maybe I was wrong.
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Tell you what.
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Why don't we drive over there
and you can rehearse what you're gonna say
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on the way, all right?
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I suppose if I don't,
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I'll have another lecture
about how I don't respect you.
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Okay, okay. I'm 95% sure
Vera's father is alive.
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No, no, dead.
No, make that dead.
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He's dead.
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Or could he be...
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Well...
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I suppose I'll just call Vera
and ask her, I guess.
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How do you ask someone
a question like that?
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Although Vera's always saying
we should talk more.
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Yes. Hi, honey...
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Hi, uh, listen, um...
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Do I have a dark suit?
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I do? Good.
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Do you remember
why I bought it?
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A funeral? Of course.
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Was, uh...
was your father there?
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Was he wearing make-up
by any chance?
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Vera? Vera...
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Shoot. This is going
to bug me all day.
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Oh, Walter.
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Oh... oh!
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Ohh!
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Katherine, we can't
go on like this.
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You're my brother's wife.
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I mean, if anyone ever found out,
it would ruin both our families.
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You're right, Walter. It's wrong.
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- Terribly wrong.
- But I don't care.
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That's my girl.
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Mr. Gaines is in the library
right through there.
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Aren't you going
to announce us?
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Very well, sir.
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Mr. Gaines, there are two gentlemen
here to see you.
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That make you feel
like a big man?
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Don't worry about that.
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Okay, just like we rehearsed it
in the car, big fella.
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All right,
I'm disappointed in him,
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he should be ashamed of himself
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and he should start
treating me with respect.
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- Attaboy.
- Yeah.
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Mr. Gaines.
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Woody! What are you doing here?
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Oh, I can see you're busy.
I'll wait outside.
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My God, Walter, who was that?
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That was my idiot son-in-law.
Woody, just a minute!
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Well, did he see us?
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Of course he saw us. I knew
something like this was gonna happen.
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I've got to catch him before he
blabs it all over the mansion.
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What do you mean
he was exercising?
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That's what it looked like.
193
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I think he was doing push-ups.
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Aw, come on!
You're just trying to back out of this.
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No, I'm not, Sam.
I'm going to tell him.
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Excuse me.
You're the gentlemen
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I led from the foyer
to the library.
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Am I correct?
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00:09:43,541 --> 00:09:45,168
- Yeah. Right.
- Yeah.
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00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:48,963
Would you be a dear
and help me find my way back?
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00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:52,050
Uh, sure.
202
00:09:52,050 --> 00:09:53,259
Actually, it's not that hard.
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00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:55,762
All you got to do
is go down that staircase
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with those naked angels that
are carved in the banister.
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Then you go through
the long hallway
206
00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:05,188
with the three naked ladies
kind of frolicking in the field,
207
00:10:05,188 --> 00:10:08,149
then you go take a left,
and you get into that big room
208
00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:10,777
that has that
bronze statue of the--
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00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:13,947
I tell you what,
why don't I take you there myself?
210
00:10:15,949 --> 00:10:19,619
Now, Woody, I know you must
be terribly confused,
211
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,121
but there's a simple explanation.
212
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:22,789
No, no, Mr. Gaines.
You're going to sit down
213
00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:24,582
and I'm going to talk
and you're going to listen.
214
00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:28,378
Now, I'm very
disappointed in you.
215
00:10:28,378 --> 00:10:29,754
You should be ashamed
of yourself.
216
00:10:29,754 --> 00:10:31,923
From now on,
things are going to be different.
217
00:10:31,923 --> 00:10:34,801
You're going to start treating me
with respect.
218
00:10:34,801 --> 00:10:36,845
Whatever you want, Woody.
What will it take
219
00:10:36,845 --> 00:10:38,721
for you to forget everything
that's happened? You name it.
220
00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:41,057
- Seriously?
- Yes. Whatever you want.
221
00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:44,602
Wow, that speech really took.
222
00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:50,692
Well, for starters, this power of attorney thing
you made me sign...
223
00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:53,194
It's gone, ripped up. Never existed.
224
00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:56,447
All right, and I don't want you
to make fun of me
225
00:10:56,447 --> 00:10:57,532
in front of my friends anymore.
226
00:10:57,532 --> 00:10:58,908
You've got it.
227
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:01,202
What I really want, Mr. Gaines,
228
00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:04,038
is just for us to get to
know each other better.
229
00:11:04,038 --> 00:11:07,458
Oh, for God's sakes, Woody,
I didn't commit murder.
230
00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:10,170
Just forget the whole thing.
231
00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,714
No. Woody, if you want to be friends,
that's fine. That's fine.
232
00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:15,133
In fact, we could, uh...
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00:11:15,133 --> 00:11:16,092
Go fishing?
234
00:11:16,092 --> 00:11:17,552
Yeah, fishing. Of course. Fine.
235
00:11:17,552 --> 00:11:20,847
In fact, why don't we
go fishing in your new boat?
236
00:11:20,847 --> 00:11:22,348
My new boat?
237
00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:23,641
- Yes.
- Really?
238
00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:27,187
In fact, why don't we call it
The S.S. Silence?
239
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:33,359
I'm sure we can come up
with a better name than that, but thanks.
240
00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:34,694
Hooray.
241
00:11:35,069 --> 00:11:38,573
I get a feeling we're going to
be pretty close from now on, Mr. Gaines.
242
00:11:41,910 --> 00:11:46,206
Well, Walter, did he know
what we were doing?
243
00:11:46,206 --> 00:11:47,665
Not only does he know,
244
00:11:47,665 --> 00:11:49,209
but he's doing it to me.
245
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:58,551
Okay, you guys,
I'm trying to get a head count here
246
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,553
so I know how many people
are here for Thanksgiving
247
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,013
so I can have enough turkey.
248
00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:04,057
Easy on the turkey for me,
though, Rebecca,
249
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:06,643
because those tryptophans
just put me to sleep.
250
00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:09,687
Get two turkeys.
251
00:12:12,023 --> 00:12:13,316
Norm, are you
gonna be here?
252
00:12:13,316 --> 00:12:14,567
Yeah, I might as well.
253
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,569
Vera's spending Thanksgiving
at her mother's.
254
00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:17,904
How come?
255
00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:21,115
She's still angry about me asking
whether her father's dead or alive.
256
00:12:22,325 --> 00:12:24,911
You never know what's going
to tick some people off.
257
00:12:26,371 --> 00:12:28,289
Normie, I've got
an easy way to find out
258
00:12:28,289 --> 00:12:31,000
whether or not your father-in-law's
still alive or not.
259
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,920
You give Vera's
parents' house a call.
260
00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:36,923
If a guy answers, bingo!
There's your answer.
261
00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:38,675
I'll tell you what--
262
00:12:38,841 --> 00:12:41,135
I'll look up the number for
you in the directory here.
263
00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:44,097
So what's
Vera's maiden name?
264
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:45,139
It's, uh...
265
00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:50,395
Damn. This is going
to get embarrassing.
266
00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:54,274
Could I be having some
severe memory lapse here?
267
00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:56,192
Well, Norm, quick...
268
00:12:56,359 --> 00:12:59,112
In Herbie the Love Bug,
who played the bad guy?
269
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:00,488
Keenan Wynn.
270
00:13:00,655 --> 00:13:02,448
Your memory's sound, my friend.
271
00:13:10,081 --> 00:13:11,082
Hey, Sam.
272
00:13:11,082 --> 00:13:14,502
Me and Mr. Gaines just went fishing
on my new boat.
273
00:13:14,502 --> 00:13:16,379
And guess what we're
doing tomorrow.
274
00:13:16,379 --> 00:13:18,256
Flying to Vermont.
275
00:13:18,256 --> 00:13:19,632
Vermont?
276
00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:23,219
Yeah. All I did was ask Mr. Gaines
how maple syrup was made,
277
00:13:23,386 --> 00:13:24,512
and the next thing you know, boom!
278
00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:26,347
- He's firing up the jet.
- That's right.
279
00:13:27,390 --> 00:13:28,308
Well...
280
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:30,226
In spite of all the fun
we've been having,
281
00:13:30,226 --> 00:13:31,644
I really must run along.
282
00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,271
Hey, Mr. Gaines...
283
00:13:33,271 --> 00:13:34,981
What about my hug?
284
00:13:34,981 --> 00:13:37,150
Oh, gee, Woody. I don't know.
285
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,152
Oh, yeah, I guess you're right.
286
00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:40,403
I don't want to catch
one of those fishhooks in my eye.
287
00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:42,989
On second thought,
come here, son.
288
00:13:48,870 --> 00:13:50,330
Wow. how about that?
289
00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:53,166
You guys are getting along great,
aren't you?
290
00:13:53,333 --> 00:13:54,542
Yeah, Sam.
291
00:13:54,709 --> 00:13:57,378
You know, I owe it all
to my little speech.
292
00:13:57,545 --> 00:14:01,132
Soon as I delivered it,
he was putty in my hands.
293
00:14:01,132 --> 00:14:03,009
Well, that's great, man. That's great.
294
00:14:03,176 --> 00:14:05,595
I noticed, though,
that you said, uh...
295
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:09,515
Your speech when, you know,
technically... it was my speech.
296
00:14:09,515 --> 00:14:10,892
Remember?
297
00:14:10,892 --> 00:14:13,061
I was over there when I thought it up.
298
00:14:13,061 --> 00:14:15,730
You may have thought it up,
but I'm the one who made it sing.
299
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:19,233
Well, whatever.
300
00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:20,360
Congratulations.
301
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,070
Yeah, you know...
302
00:14:22,070 --> 00:14:23,696
When Woody Boyd talks,
303
00:14:23,696 --> 00:14:25,198
people listen.
304
00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:28,701
As a matter of fact, Sam,
305
00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:31,913
I'm going to do you
a great big favor.
306
00:14:32,997 --> 00:14:36,167
Mr. Peterson, I'm going to talk,
and you're going to listen.
307
00:14:36,167 --> 00:14:38,127
It's about your beer tab.
308
00:14:38,127 --> 00:14:41,381
Wood, stay in the shallow end.
309
00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:45,593
Yeah, maybe you're right. Sorry.
310
00:14:51,641 --> 00:14:54,185
Get him, get him. Oh...
311
00:14:54,185 --> 00:14:55,186
Oh, man...
312
00:14:55,853 --> 00:14:56,979
This is great.
313
00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:58,898
- Norm.
- Yeah.
314
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:02,360
The Barcalounger is only here
for today, right?
315
00:15:03,277 --> 00:15:05,905
Thanksgiving just wouldn't be the same
without it, Sam.
316
00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:09,450
Tomorrow it goes back,
right?
317
00:15:09,617 --> 00:15:12,286
You signed this agreement.
remember?
318
00:15:14,038 --> 00:15:15,456
Sam, what do you think
of all the decorations?
319
00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:16,958
I bought everything
with my own money.
320
00:15:16,958 --> 00:15:18,751
Yeah. You know, I've been
meaning to ask you,
321
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,379
what do skeletons and witches
have to do with Thanksgiving?
322
00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:26,342
Well, uh, the witches
came over with the pilgrims.
323
00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:32,056
And then the pilgrims
burned them all at the stake.
324
00:15:32,223 --> 00:15:35,226
And then when they were
all burned up,
325
00:15:35,226 --> 00:15:38,062
there was nothing left of them
but skeletons.
326
00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:42,775
And that left the pilgrims
free to make a big dinner.
327
00:15:46,279 --> 00:15:47,321
They were cheap,
huh?
328
00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:49,532
Actually, they were
throwing them out.
329
00:15:51,325 --> 00:15:54,662
Well, it looks-- it looks really nice, Rebecca.
It looks really nice.
330
00:15:54,662 --> 00:15:56,497
What about the,
uh, the plates?
331
00:15:56,664 --> 00:15:58,458
I'm going to borrow
those from Melville's.
332
00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,418
No, no! Don't do that.
333
00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:03,421
If John Hill finds out,
he'll blow his bald stack.
334
00:16:03,421 --> 00:16:04,672
Oh, don't be silly.
335
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:07,508
Melville's is closed,
and John Hill's at the Cape.
336
00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:10,052
Besides, I'm already using his oven
to cook the turkey.
337
00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:12,513
In that case, why don't you get
some silverware.
338
00:16:12,680 --> 00:16:15,224
I think we're going
to run out of these... sporks.
339
00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:18,144
Well, here we are,
Frederick.
340
00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:20,730
Over the river
and through the woods
341
00:16:20,897 --> 00:16:22,565
To the barstool
on the right
342
00:16:23,524 --> 00:16:26,360
Ah, the beginnings of a marvelous
Thanksgiving memory.
343
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:29,071
Say, Norm, last time
I was at your house,
344
00:16:29,071 --> 00:16:30,406
wasn't this chair red?
345
00:16:30,406 --> 00:16:32,658
Yeah. I go through them
pretty quickly.
346
00:16:34,577 --> 00:16:37,205
- Hi, Frasier. Hi, Frederick.
- Hello.
347
00:16:37,205 --> 00:16:39,499
Hey! How do you like the way
I decked the place out?
348
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:41,709
Well, I must say it looks rather...
349
00:16:42,126 --> 00:16:42,919
festive.
350
00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,003
Thank you.
351
00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:45,546
You're getting
plates from Melville's?
352
00:16:45,546 --> 00:16:48,883
You know, what would look beautiful
is those gorgeous candlesticks they have.
353
00:16:48,883 --> 00:16:51,135
Ooh, good idea.
Why don't you go grab those.
354
00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:52,136
Come here, Frederick.
355
00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:55,515
Well, you guys
lucked out.
356
00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:57,850
You get to spend your Thanksgiving
with the Tortellis.
357
00:16:57,850 --> 00:16:58,851
Hide your valuables.
358
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,939
Hey, kids,
park it over there.
359
00:17:02,939 --> 00:17:05,733
Carla, why did you only bring
three of your kids?
360
00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:08,444
Well, we have this kind of
Thanksgiving tradition at our home.
361
00:17:08,611 --> 00:17:11,155
You see, at noon,
I set them out on the curb,
362
00:17:11,155 --> 00:17:14,825
then the various men
they've come to know as "Dad" drive by,
363
00:17:14,825 --> 00:17:17,662
and whoever's left
comes with me.
364
00:17:20,248 --> 00:17:23,251
Uh, there must be
some mistake here.
365
00:17:23,251 --> 00:17:25,878
You got me sitting
at the kiddie table.
366
00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:31,342
Uh, no, no. No mistake, Cliff.
367
00:17:31,342 --> 00:17:35,012
We all decided that
you're the only one that we trust
368
00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:36,180
being an adult supervisor.
369
00:17:37,139 --> 00:17:39,475
Well, that's another bowl of stuffing,
then, Sammy.
370
00:17:39,642 --> 00:17:42,019
I'd be proud to watch
the little tykes.
371
00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:44,313
So, kiddies...
372
00:17:45,273 --> 00:17:47,692
I ever tell you about
the first Thanksgiving?
373
00:17:48,276 --> 00:17:51,487
Yeah, it took place
between the Ancient Egyptians
374
00:17:51,654 --> 00:17:54,031
and astronauts
from a distant galaxy.
375
00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:59,161
Here, Mr. Peterson.
376
00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:00,746
Oh, thank you, Frederick.
377
00:18:03,541 --> 00:18:05,876
God, I wish I'd had kids.
378
00:18:12,550 --> 00:18:14,552
Food's on. Come on, everybody.
379
00:18:14,552 --> 00:18:16,262
Sit down around
the table here.
380
00:18:18,306 --> 00:18:19,515
Listen, here's the good news--
381
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:20,766
You can make a mess.
382
00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:24,061
And don't worry about breaking anything
'cause none of this stuff belongs to us.
383
00:18:24,061 --> 00:18:25,688
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
384
00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:28,858
Sam, why don't you
make a little toast?
385
00:18:28,858 --> 00:18:31,944
Oh! Yeah, all right, that's a good idea.
386
00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:33,529
Uh... all right.
387
00:18:33,696 --> 00:18:37,408
Uh, welcome to
Thanksgiving at Cheers.
388
00:18:37,408 --> 00:18:39,452
I hope everybody
enjoys the food...
389
00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:43,039
And I'd like to make
a toast right now
390
00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:45,124
to the man who made this
all possible,
391
00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:46,959
John Allen Hill.
392
00:18:47,710 --> 00:18:50,171
Now come on. I know what you're thinking,
393
00:18:50,338 --> 00:18:51,589
but I'll tell you the truth,
394
00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:54,258
if John and I hadn't gotten
off on the wrong foot,
395
00:18:54,425 --> 00:18:55,843
I think we would've
been best of friends.
396
00:18:55,843 --> 00:18:57,595
If he were here right now,
397
00:18:57,595 --> 00:19:00,264
I'd ask him to sit down
and break bread with us.
398
00:19:00,264 --> 00:19:02,892
But because he isn't,
then I say let's raise our glasses
399
00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:05,269
to that grand old
gentleman, John Allen Hill.
400
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:08,105
Well, isn't this touching?
401
00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:11,192
All the Whos down in Whoville
402
00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:13,277
gathered round their roast beast.
403
00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:17,406
Good heavens, man,
I thought you were at the cape.
404
00:19:17,406 --> 00:19:19,700
I was until the police
called to tell me
405
00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:21,994
the silent alarm
had gone off upstairs.
406
00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:24,789
Uh, yes.
That was us, John.
407
00:19:24,789 --> 00:19:29,043
I'm sorry. We borrowed a few things
for our simple dinner here.
408
00:19:29,043 --> 00:19:31,253
John, I tell you what,
why don't you join us, please?
409
00:19:31,253 --> 00:19:33,297
No, no. Thank you. Please, I couldn't.
410
00:19:33,464 --> 00:19:36,467
But since no harm was done,
I'll be on my way.
411
00:19:36,634 --> 00:19:37,927
Happy Thanksgiving.
412
00:19:37,927 --> 00:19:40,054
And do sterilize everything.
413
00:19:42,973 --> 00:19:43,974
Thank you, John.
414
00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:45,267
Happy Thanksgiving.
415
00:19:48,354 --> 00:19:49,814
So how'd you spot him?
416
00:19:49,814 --> 00:19:52,692
I saw the reflection
of his head in the dessert tray.
417
00:19:59,573 --> 00:20:02,702
Mr. and Mrs. Woody Boyd.
418
00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:05,871
How was that, sport?
419
00:20:07,373 --> 00:20:08,833
Hi, Daddy.
420
00:20:08,833 --> 00:20:10,000
Hello, Pumpkin.
421
00:20:10,167 --> 00:20:11,877
It's good to see you.
422
00:20:11,877 --> 00:20:13,170
Hi, Dad.
423
00:20:13,170 --> 00:20:14,296
Hello, son.
424
00:20:16,173 --> 00:20:17,675
- Happy Thanksgiving.
- Happy Thanksgiving.
425
00:20:17,675 --> 00:20:19,677
Hi, Uncle Richard, Aunt Katherine.
426
00:20:19,677 --> 00:20:20,803
- Hello, darling.
- Richard.
427
00:20:20,970 --> 00:20:21,929
Walter.
428
00:20:21,929 --> 00:20:25,307
Woody, certain parties
are here this evening,
429
00:20:25,307 --> 00:20:27,017
and things might get
very delicate.
430
00:20:27,017 --> 00:20:28,811
Don't worry about
a thing, Mr. Gaines.
431
00:20:28,811 --> 00:20:30,730
Boy, she looks familiar.
432
00:20:32,148 --> 00:20:33,107
Now, Woody...
433
00:20:33,107 --> 00:20:35,276
Where have I
seen her before?
434
00:20:35,276 --> 00:20:37,153
Help me out here,
Mr. Gaines.
435
00:20:37,153 --> 00:20:39,029
I got it.
436
00:20:39,029 --> 00:20:40,823
Everyone into
the dining room.
437
00:20:40,823 --> 00:20:42,366
I can smell
that turkey's all ready.
438
00:20:42,366 --> 00:20:43,784
Let's just move along now.
439
00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:45,870
The cranberry sauce
and stuffing--
440
00:20:45,870 --> 00:20:47,163
All the trimmings.
441
00:20:47,163 --> 00:20:49,248
Let's just move right along.
Come on, move, move.
442
00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:50,833
Save me a drumstick.
443
00:20:50,833 --> 00:20:52,168
Woody...
444
00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:54,253
I thought we had
an understanding.
445
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:56,380
Now, we went fishing,
I took you bowling,
446
00:20:56,547 --> 00:20:57,882
we went to the arcade.
447
00:20:57,882 --> 00:21:00,426
If there's a lower-middle-class activity
in Boston, we've done it.
448
00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:04,889
I'm sorry, Mr. Gaines.
I was trying to figure out
449
00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:08,184
Where I knew Kelly's aunt from,
and it finally came to me.
450
00:21:08,184 --> 00:21:09,518
Of course it came to you.
451
00:21:09,518 --> 00:21:11,562
You caught me making love to her
on the floor of my office!
452
00:21:11,562 --> 00:21:12,730
I met her at the wedding.
453
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:14,023
I caught you what?
454
00:21:14,023 --> 00:21:15,065
Nothing!
455
00:21:16,442 --> 00:21:17,401
Let's eat.
456
00:21:17,401 --> 00:21:19,570
Holy cow,
that's your brother's wife,
457
00:21:19,570 --> 00:21:21,113
and you're having
an affair with her?
458
00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:23,866
Yes. You really didn't know?
459
00:21:23,866 --> 00:21:24,867
No.
460
00:21:24,867 --> 00:21:26,410
Then you're not
blackmailing me?
461
00:21:26,577 --> 00:21:28,412
I didn't have to
buy your silence?
462
00:21:28,412 --> 00:21:31,290
Well, no. I would never
blackmail you, Mr. Gaines.
463
00:21:31,457 --> 00:21:33,959
I think what you're doing
is disgusting and wrong,
464
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:35,044
but that's between you and Satan.
465
00:21:37,338 --> 00:21:39,006
I've got something to tell you.
466
00:21:39,173 --> 00:21:41,133
I think that we can't
be friends anymore.
467
00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:42,092
I don't respect you.
468
00:21:42,092 --> 00:21:45,971
Well, I'll just have to live
with your scorn and contempt, Woody.
469
00:21:45,971 --> 00:21:47,681
Okay, Mr. Gaines.
470
00:21:47,681 --> 00:21:50,267
I just want you to know,
I'd never blackmail you.
471
00:21:50,267 --> 00:21:52,144
I'd much rather do this.
472
00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:54,063
Hey, everybody, I got
something to tell you!
473
00:21:54,063 --> 00:21:55,314
I want the wishbone!
474
00:21:57,483 --> 00:21:58,400
Gotcha!
475
00:22:00,110 --> 00:22:01,904
This is going
to be a fun night.
476
00:22:04,490 --> 00:22:06,325
Dear God...
477
00:22:06,492 --> 00:22:08,327
It's over.
478
00:22:08,494 --> 00:22:10,162
I'm free.
479
00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:12,331
Finally free.
480
00:22:12,498 --> 00:22:15,417
Your brother's wife, eh, Wally?
481
00:22:17,503 --> 00:22:19,171
Get me a drink.
482
00:22:20,130 --> 00:22:21,882
We have to talk.