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<font color="#ffffff">This programme</font>
<font color="#ffffff">contains some strong language.</font>

2
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<font color="#ffffff">So, Nina, to sum up,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">just because I like conservation,</font>

3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:09,640
<font color="#ffffff">it does not mean I'm a Conservative.</font>

4
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<font color="#00ffff">Wow, Ken, that was, er, thorough.</font>

5
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<font color="#00ffff">Nina is going to be really,</font>
<font color="#00ffff">really impressed.</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Funny enough on the last question?</font>

7
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<font color="#00ffff">God, yeah. Yeah.</font>

8
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<font color="#ffffff">Ask me another one.</font>
<font color="#00ffff">Oh, Ken, I think you're all set.</font>

9
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<font color="#ffffff">Come on, Lorna!</font>
<font color="#ffffff">If I'm going to ace this interview</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">I need to be across all the issues.</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">Oh, God. Er...</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, I get it, you're bored.</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">Ken, no. No, you make</font>
<font color="#00ffff">local politics...sing.</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">And that is why</font>
<font color="#00ffff">you are going to make</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">a phenomenal Lib Dem</font>
<font color="#00ffff">local councillor.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">Ken's going to be a politician.</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">You know, I've always taken</font>
<font color="#ffffff">an interest.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">That's funny, cos every time</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">I bring it up to you,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">you kind of just glaze over.</font>

19
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<font color="#ffff00">Oh, by the way, I borrowed</font>
<font color="#ffff00">some of your suit pants.</font>

20
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<font color="#ffffff">Oh no.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">Yeah, kind of had a laundry crisis.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">And, Ken,</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">in the interest of full disclosure,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I am full-on commando under these.</font>

23
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<font color="#00ffff">I tell you what, Cuckoo,</font>
<font color="#00ffff">why don't you take over here?</font>

24
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<font color="#ffffff">What are you doing?</font>

25
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<font color="#00ffff">It'll be good for you to perform</font>
<font color="#00ffff">to a young and informed audience.</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">Full marks from me though, bye.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">OK.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">What's your take on parking policy?</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Well, Nina,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">if you'll pardon my French,</font>

30
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<font color="#ffffff">I think it's a ruddy shambles.</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Just the other day I saw a statistic,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">I think it was 45% of cars</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">stop for five minutes or less</font>
<font color="#ffffff">in the high street...</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">OK, Ken, can I just stop you there?</font>

34
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<font color="#ffff00">I don't mean to sound too harsh,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">but that was fucking dog shit.</font>

35
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<font color="#ffff00">You didn't connect in any way.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">I hate to be the bearer of bad news,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">but you need to cancel your meeting.</font>

37
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<font color="#ffff00">You're not ready.</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Right. I think the news is on.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">No, no, no! Don't you dare!</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Stop, stop, stop, stop!</font>

40
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<font color="#ffff00">What is your name?</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Get out of my way, Cuckoo.</font>

41
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<font color="#ffff00">What is your name?</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">My name is Ken.</font>

43
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<font color="#ffff00">Ken what? Ken Banana, is it</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Ken Banana? </font><font color="#ffffff">Ken Thompson.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">Ah! Ken Thompson, correct. Do you,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Ken Thompson, love Litchfield?</font>

45
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<font color="#ffffff">Well, I suppose, I...</font>

46
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<font color="#ffff00">It's a simple question!</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Do you love this town?</font>

47
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<font color="#ffff00">Yes or no? Yes or no? </font><font color="#ffffff">Yes!</font>

48
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<font color="#ffff00">Aha! You see that.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">You just got my vote.</font>

49
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<font color="#ffff00">Leadership is so simple, Ken.</font>

50
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<font color="#ffff00">All you have to do is be open</font>
<font color="#ffff00">to people, love, never judge</font>

51
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<font color="#ffff00">and if you do all that,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">people may finally respond to you.</font>

52
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<font color="#ffff00">Am I being too preachy?</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I am, right? I'm being too preachy.</font>

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<font color="#00ff00">Mum. I might be being paranoid,</font>
<font color="#00ff00">but I sometimes worry that Cuckoo</font>

54
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<font color="#00ff00">and dad don't get on.</font>

55
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<font color="#00ffff">What? No.</font>

56
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<font color="#00ff00">You know, they never spend</font>
<font color="#00ff00">any quality time together.</font>

57
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<font color="#00ffff">Well, the thing about your dad is,</font>
<font color="#00ffff">Rach, he can be very shy.</font>

58
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<font color="#00ffff">Sometimes he just needs</font>
<font color="#00ffff">a little pushing.</font>

59
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<font color="#00ff00">Mum, are you scheming?</font>

60
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<font color="#00ffff">Are you coming to the party on</font>
<font color="#00ffff">Saturday? Did she invite you?</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">Um, yeah? </font><font color="#00ffff">She didn't.</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">OK, you can come with me</font>
<font color="#00ffff">as long as you get pills.</font>

63
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<font color="#ffff00">Brilliant! Pills?</font>

64
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<font color="#00ffff">Oh, well, I'd do it myself,</font>
<font color="#00ffff">but my parents are watching me</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">at the moment, so...</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, no problem.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">It might be a bit hard because, er,</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">my dealer got hit</font>
<font color="#ffff00">in a gangland shooting.</font>

69
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<font color="#00ffff">Who's your dealer?</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">His name's Tony Montana.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">He lives in Stourbridge.</font>

71
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<font color="#ffff00">He's Cuban. Very nice.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">But he's stubborn.</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">I've got one. I'll text you</font>
<font color="#00ffff">his number. </font><font color="#ffff00">Yeah, all right.</font>

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<font color="#00ffff">Sleazing on my girl?</font>
<font color="#00ffff">Not cool, Thompson.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">Look, Neil, Zoe dumped you.</font>

75
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<font color="#ffff00">She's my family friend,</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">and I actually bagsied her</font>
<font color="#ffff00">when I was four.</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">So, when you look at it like that,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">you're actually</font>

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<font color="#ffff00">out of order for going out</font>
<font color="#ffff00">with her in the first place.</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">BOYS: Fight, fight, fight,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">fight, fight!</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Nina! So good to see you.</font>

81
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<font color="#00ff00">Aw. </font><font color="#ffffff">Long time no see. </font><font color="#00ff00">Yeah!</font>

82
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<font color="#ffffff">How have you been since...you know?</font>

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<font color="#00ff00">We got back together. </font><font color="#ffffff">No! </font><font color="#00ff00">Yes!</font>
<font color="#ffffff">That's great.</font>

84
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<font color="#00ff00">We just realised</font>
<font color="#00ff00">that we loved each other</font>

85
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<font color="#00ff00">and so now it's just him and me</font>

86
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<font color="#00ff00">and our kid and our love kid,</font>
<font color="#00ff00">and it's a bit like,</font>

87
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<font color="#00ff00">"Oh, why did we let everything</font>
<font color="#00ff00">get so complicated before?"</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Wow. That sounds absolutely crazy!</font>

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<font color="#00ff00">Yeah.</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Tell that to Rupert Murdoch.</font>

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<font color="#00ff00">Oh! I didn't know you were so funny.</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Well...yes.</font>

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<font color="#00ff00">And intelligent and presentable,</font>
<font color="#00ff00">even rather dashing.</font>

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<font color="#ffffff">Stop it.</font>

95
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<font color="#00ff00">Although you should do something</font>
<font color="#00ff00">about the belly. </font><font color="#ffffff">All right.</font>

96
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<font color="#00ff00">Anyway, it all looks very promising.</font>

97
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<font color="#00ff00">I mean, you should see</font>
<font color="#00ff00">some of the other candidates.</font>

98
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<font color="#ffffff">Oh really? Oh dear. Are they...?</font>

99
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<font color="#00ff00">So, um, I shouldn't really say this,</font>

100
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<font color="#00ff00">but the committee will go</font>
<font color="#00ff00">with my recommendations,</font>

101
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<font color="#00ff00">and so I think you've pretty much</font>
<font color="#00ff00">got it in the bag.</font>

102
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<font color="#ffffff">Nina, thank you.</font>

103
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<font color="#00ff00">So I'll follow through...</font>

104
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<font color="#ffffff">PHONE RINGS</font>

105
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<font color="#00ff00">Oh! Sorry, um, oh, one sec.</font>

106
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<font color="#ffffff">No problem.</font>

107
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<font color="#ffffff">Get it in.</font>

108
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<font color="#00ff00">I'm sorry, Ken, I've got to go -</font>
<font color="#00ff00">some little thug at school's</font>

109
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<font color="#00ff00">attacked my son Neil.</font>

110
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<font color="#ffffff">Oh, Nina, that's awful.</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Kids these days. How old is Neil?</font>

111
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<font color="#00ff00">He's 16.</font>

112
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<font color="#ffffff">I can so relate, my Dylan's 16</font>

113
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<font color="#ffffff">and if someone did something</font>
<font color="#ffffff">like that to him...</font>

114
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<font color="#ffff00">Mr Thompson...</font>

115
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<font color="#ffffff">Not now, Jefali. </font><font color="#ffff00">It's just,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">the school just called.</font>

116
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<font color="#ffff00">Your son Dylan's been in a fight.</font>

117
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<font color="#ffffff">He's what? </font><font color="#ffff00">A fight!</font>

118
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<font color="#00ffff">So, Dylan, we should hear</font>
<font color="#00ffff">your side of the story.</font>

119
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<font color="#ffff00">Yeah, no problem. Basically,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Neil was being a massive twat.</font>

120
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<font color="#ffff00">Turns out he's not as hard as</font>
<font color="#ffff00">he makes out and I battered him.</font>

121
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<font color="#ffffff">Shut up, Dylan.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I did, Dad, I really whooped him!</font>

122
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<font color="#00ff00">Oh, God.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I handed him his arse on a plate.</font>

123
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<font color="#ffffff">Dylan, I am very disappointed in you.</font>

124
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<font color="#ffffff">There is no excuse</font>
<font color="#ffffff">for fighting in school.</font>

125
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<font color="#ffffff">Although, we as parents must</font>
<font color="#ffffff">understand, these things do happen.</font>

126
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<font color="#ffffff">Boys fight, it's only natural.</font>

127
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<font color="#00ff00">You think violence is natural?</font>

128
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<font color="#ffffff">No, Nina,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">that's why I said it was unnatural.</font>

129
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<font color="#ffffff">What is wrong with you,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">you little freak?</font>

130
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<font color="#ffff00">Neil started it. </font><font color="#ffffff">Shut up, Dylan!</font>
<font color="#ffffff">You are grounded for...</font>

131
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<font color="#ffffff">four years.</font>

132
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<font color="#ffff00">But I go to uni in two years.</font>

133
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<font color="#ffffff">Not any more, you're that grounded.</font>

134
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<font color="#00ff00">Ken, that's a bit extreme.</font>

135
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<font color="#ffffff">You're right. Dylan, I went too far.</font>
<font color="#ffffff">You're no longer grounded.</font>

136
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<font color="#00ff00">But he should be punished.</font>

137
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<font color="#ffffff">Yeah! And he will be.</font>
<font color="#ffffff">You, Dylan, are...</font>

138
00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,160
<font color="#00ff00">Oh, I don't know.</font>
<font color="#00ff00">Grounded for a month?</font>

139
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<font color="#ffffff">Grounded for a month, buster.</font>

140
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<font color="#ffff00">Oh. </font><font color="#ffffff">Suck on that.</font>

141
00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:05,320
<font color="#00ffff">Excellent. Right, um,</font>
<font color="#00ffff">well, I think we're all done here.</font>

142
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<font color="#00ffff">Ken. Thank you, Nina.</font>
<font color="#00ff00">Thank you, James.</font>

143
00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:10,120
<font color="#ffffff">Nina? I'll walk you to the car.</font>

144
00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:13,120
<font color="#00ff00">Ken. This whole councillor thing,</font>
<font color="#00ff00">we would be</font>

145
00:07:13,120 --> 00:07:17,640
<font color="#00ff00">working very closely together</font>
<font color="#00ff00">and this does make it awkward.</font>

146
00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:19,000
<font color="#ffffff">It's not awkward!</font>

147
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<font color="#ffffff">Come on, Nina,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">this will just be a story</font>

148
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:24,640
<font color="#ffffff">we tell about how one of our sons</font>
<font color="#ffffff">kicked and punched the other,</font>

149
00:07:24,640 --> 00:07:27,440
<font color="#ffffff">and we all laughed about it</font>
<font color="#ffffff">afterwards.</font>

150
00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:31,080
<font color="#00ff00">Perhaps I was a bit hasty in</font>
<font color="#00ff00">offering you the position outright.</font>

151
00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:33,760
<font color="#00ff00">Come on Neil, come on.</font>

152
00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:37,440
<font color="#ffffff">Um...</font>

153
00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:39,960
<font color="#ffff00">Am I seriously grounded?</font>

154
00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:41,600
<font color="#ffffff">No, we're not American.</font>

155
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:46,120
<font color="#ffffff">PHONE RINGS</font>

156
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<font color="#00ffff">Answer it, Dylan.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Nah. Can't be bothered.</font>

157
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<font color="#00ff00">I'll answer it.</font>

158
00:07:55,760 --> 00:07:59,440
<font color="#ffff00">Hello? Oh, hi, it's you.</font>

159
00:07:59,440 --> 00:08:05,120
<font color="#ffff00">Um, I can't, I can't talk right now</font>
<font color="#ffff00">so... Right, OK.</font>

160
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<font color="#ffff00">I heard that you were selling</font>
<font color="#ffff00">PlayStation games,</font>

161
00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:11,640
<font color="#ffff00">and I'd quite like to get some</font>
<font color="#ffff00">urgently for Saturday night.</font>

162
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<font color="#ffff00">Not the expensive,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">arrogant PlayStation games,</font>

163
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:20,240
<font color="#ffff00">more the kind of fun,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">"Whoo, this music's great,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">loving everyone,"</font>

164
00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:22,920
<font color="#ffff00">kind of PlayStation game.</font>

165
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<font color="#ffff00">You with me? Brilliant,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I'll get them tomorrow. Safe.</font>

166
00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:30,520
<font color="#ffff00">He sells PlayStation games.</font>

167
00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:34,960
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, my back is killing me.</font>

168
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<font color="#00ffff">I'll ask Steve to drop off</font>
<font color="#00ffff">some of those</font>
<font color="#00ffff">prescription painkillers for you.</font>

169
00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:40,560
<font color="#00ffff">Dylan told us</font>
<font color="#00ffff">what happened with Nina.</font>

170
00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:42,320
<font color="#ffffff">Well, what can you do, Lorna?</font>

171
00:08:42,320 --> 00:08:43,680
<font color="#ffffff">Fate gives with the one hand,</font>

172
00:08:43,680 --> 00:08:46,240
<font color="#ffffff">and with the other hand</font>
<font color="#ffffff">pops his fingers into your backside,</font>

173
00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:49,480
<font color="#ffffff">pulls your intestines out</font>
<font color="#ffffff">and douses them with acid.</font>

174
00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:51,320
<font color="#ffffff">Oh!</font>

175
00:08:51,320 --> 00:08:54,520
<font color="#ffff00">Oh, Kenneth Brannagh,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I feel so horrible for you.</font>

176
00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:57,400
<font color="#ffff00">Just so tired of being right</font>
<font color="#ffff00">all the time.</font>

177
00:08:57,400 --> 00:09:01,880
<font color="#ffffff">OK. Number one,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">I've asked you never to massage me.</font>

178
00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:03,200
<font color="#ffff00">Not true.</font>

179
00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:05,400
<font color="#ffffff">Number two. You weren't right,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">I aced the interview.</font>

180
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,840
<font color="#ffff00">Hey, I'm not trying to be</font>
<font color="#ffff00">controversial here.</font>

181
00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:10,280
<font color="#ffff00">But if you had taken my advice</font>
<font color="#ffff00">you wouldn't be suffering</font>

182
00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:12,440
<font color="#ffff00">this abject humiliation.</font>

183
00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:14,000
<font color="#ffffff">It was just bad luck, that's all.</font>

184
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:18,240
<font color="#ffff00">Bad luck? Or bad judgment. </font><font color="#ffffff">Oh.</font>

185
00:09:18,240 --> 00:09:20,880
<font color="#ffff00">I told you you weren't ready,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">and I was right.</font>

186
00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:22,080
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, get fucked. </font><font color="#ffff00">Hey!</font>

187
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:23,400
<font color="#00ff00">Dad! </font><font color="#00ffff">Ken!</font>

188
00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:25,000
<font color="#ffffff">Well!</font>

189
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:31,760
<font color="#ffff00">Look. Ken, please understand,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I'm not trying to embarrass you.</font>

190
00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:37,520
<font color="#ffff00">I'm embarrassed FOR you.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Do you see the difference?</font>

191
00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:39,880
<font color="#ffffff">Yeah. Right, I'm going to read</font>
<font color="#ffffff">my book.</font>

192
00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:46,080
<font color="#ffff00">Wait, Ken. Ken! Your negativity</font>
<font color="#ffff00">is causing you pain, Ken.</font>

193
00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:52,920
<font color="#00ffff">Oh, love, there's no need</font>
<font color="#00ffff">to take it out on Cuckoo.</font>

194
00:09:52,920 --> 00:09:56,480
<font color="#ffffff">Well, I feel bad enough without</font>
<font color="#ffffff">his torrents of Karmic drivel.</font>

195
00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:59,920
<font color="#00ffff">You've made Rachel paranoid</font>
<font color="#00ffff">that the two of you don't get on.</font>

196
00:09:59,920 --> 00:10:02,760
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, wow, mad, I'm worried about her.</font>

197
00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:07,760
<font color="#ffffff">All right, I shouldn't have snapped</font>
<font color="#ffffff">but... Just keep him</font>

198
00:10:07,760 --> 00:10:11,120
<font color="#ffffff">away from me for a couple</font>
<font color="#ffffff">of days, will you? </font><font color="#00ffff">Yeah.</font>

199
00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:14,480
<font color="#00ffff">I've arranged a girls' night for me</font>

200
00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:17,000
<font color="#00ffff">and Rach, to give you</font>
<font color="#00ffff">and Cuckoo time to bond.</font>

201
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:18,240
<font color="#ffffff">You've done what?</font>

202
00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:19,720
<font color="#00ffff">Rachel and I are going to Connie's.</font>

203
00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:23,080
<font color="#00ffff">You and Cuckoo are going to have</font>
<font color="#00ffff">a lovely time together,</font>
<font color="#00ffff">just the two of you.</font>

204
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:27,400
<font color="#00ffff">And you're going to bond.</font>
<font color="#00ffff">And reassure your daughter. </font><font color="#ffffff">Oh.</font>

205
00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:30,760
<font color="#00ffff">What, is that your back again? </font><font color="#ffffff">No.</font>

206
00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:44,480
<font color="#ffff00">Hey! Dad!</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I thought you went shopping.</font>

207
00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:46,920
<font color="#ffffff">Those Steve's painkillers?</font>
<font color="#ffff00">What?</font>

208
00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:49,680
<font color="#ffffff">The tablets in your hand.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">There aren't any tablets in my hand.</font>

209
00:10:49,680 --> 00:10:51,120
<font color="#ffffff">Yes, there are! Open your hand.</font>

210
00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:55,200
<font color="#ffffff">Are those the pills</font>
<font color="#ffffff">that Steve dropped round?</font>

211
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,320
<font color="#ffff00">No. </font><font color="#ffffff">Then what are they?</font>

212
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:03,200
<font color="#ffff00">Oh, these, these are the pills</font>
<font color="#ffff00">that Steve dropped round for you.</font>

213
00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:04,560
<font color="#ffffff">Right. Thank you.</font>

214
00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:13,520
<font color="#00ff00">Where's Dad? </font><font color="#ffffff">Hi, Rach.</font>

215
00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:16,840
<font color="#00ff00">Oh, is your back still bad?</font>
<font color="#00ff00">Have you taken the painkillers?</font>

216
00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:18,560
<font color="#ffffff">You have to take them with food.</font>

217
00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:20,800
<font color="#ffffff">Lorna, watch, watch!</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Don't step on me!</font>

218
00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:23,360
<font color="#00ffff">I am not going to step on you!</font>

219
00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:24,760
<font color="#ffffff">Ow! Lorna.</font>

220
00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:27,840
<font color="#00ffff">It was an accident.</font>
<font color="#00ffff">Honestly, he is such a grumpy pants.</font>

221
00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:29,480
<font color="#ffffff">I'm entitled to be grumpy,</font>

222
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,720
<font color="#ffffff">the forces of destiny</font>
<font color="#ffffff">are amassed against me.</font>

223
00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:34,480
<font color="#00ff00">Aw. Well, Cuckoo will cheer you up.</font>

224
00:11:34,480 --> 00:11:38,080
<font color="#00ff00">He's got sick plans for you two</font>
<font color="#00ff00">tonight. </font><font color="#ffffff">He must shelve them.</font>

225
00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:42,160
<font color="#00ff00">Dad. Please just try</font>
<font color="#00ff00">and make an effort.</font>

226
00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:43,680
<font color="#00ff00">How do you put up with him?</font>

227
00:11:43,680 --> 00:11:46,400
<font color="#00ffff">I ask myself that every day.</font>

228
00:11:46,400 --> 00:11:47,520
<font color="#ffffff">Ow!</font>

229
00:11:50,200 --> 00:11:52,400
<font color="#00ffff">See you later, love.</font>

230
00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:53,600
<font color="#00ff00">Bye, Dad. </font><font color="#ffffff">Bye, bye.</font>

231
00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:55,040
<font color="#00ff00">Now, remember what I said.</font>

232
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:02,360
<font color="#ffff00">I thought we could start</font>
<font color="#ffff00">by exploring your Mayan calendar.</font>

233
00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:11,160
<font color="#00ff00">God, I hope they're getting on.</font>
<font color="#00ffff">They'll have a great time.</font>

234
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:15,720
<font color="#00ffff">And we are going to let our hair</font>
<font color="#00ffff">down and listen to Madonna,</font>

235
00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:18,120
<font color="#00ffff">and have a wild and crazy night.</font>

236
00:12:18,120 --> 00:12:20,360
<font color="#00ff00">Yeah.</font>

237
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:21,920
<font color="#ffff00">Ready to party?</font>

238
00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:26,040
<font color="#00ffff">Whoo! Girls' night.</font>
<font color="#00ffff">Just the girls having fun together.</font>

239
00:12:26,040 --> 00:12:28,560
<font color="#ffff00">Guess who came back</font>
<font color="#ffff00">from university today?</font>

240
00:12:29,680 --> 00:12:30,880
<font color="#ffffff">What's up, Lorna?</font>

241
00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:33,880
<font color="#ffff00">It's my Zeb!</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Isn't this a surprise, Rachel?</font>

242
00:12:33,880 --> 00:12:35,080
<font color="#ffffff">Hey, Rach.</font>

243
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,560
<font color="#00ff00">Zeb.</font>

244
00:12:36,560 --> 00:12:38,960
<font color="#ffff00">Well, go on, Zeb,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">give Rachel a kiss hello,</font>

245
00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:41,040
<font color="#ffff00">you haven't seen her</font>
<font color="#ffff00">for half a year.</font>

246
00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:44,440
<font color="#ffff00">Grown so tall, hasn't he, Rachel?</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Like a strong oak.</font>

247
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:58,520
<font color="#ffffff">KNOCKING</font>

248
00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:00,920
<font color="#ffffff">I'm reading! </font><font color="#ffff00">I made dinner.</font>

249
00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:03,080
<font color="#ffffff">I'll come and get mine later.</font>

250
00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:10,200
<font color="#ffff00">Ken. I just slaved away</font>
<font color="#ffff00">over this beautiful repast.</font>

251
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:13,000
<font color="#ffff00">Now come enjoy it with me.</font>

252
00:13:17,520 --> 00:13:18,840
<font color="#ffff00">How great is this? Right?</font>

253
00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:23,640
<font color="#ffff00">Just the two of us,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I mean, how often does this happen?</font>

254
00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:24,960
<font color="#ffffff">Not often, no.</font>

255
00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:26,680
<font color="#ffff00">So let's get to know each other,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Ken.</font>

256
00:13:26,680 --> 00:13:28,360
<font color="#ffff00">I mean, what were you like as a kid?</font>

257
00:13:28,360 --> 00:13:30,160
<font color="#ffff00">I bet you were really</font>
<font color="#ffff00">mischievous, right?</font>

258
00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:31,680
<font color="#ffffff">Not especially, no.</font>

259
00:13:31,680 --> 00:13:33,400
<font color="#ffff00">Oh.</font>

260
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:35,360
<font color="#ffffff">Well, finished. That was delicious,</font>

261
00:13:35,360 --> 00:13:37,200
<font color="#ffffff">thank you so much. </font><font color="#ffff00">Wait, Ken, Ken.</font>

262
00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:42,160
<font color="#ffff00">Come on, I mean,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">we're supposed to be bonding here.</font>

263
00:13:42,160 --> 00:13:45,160
<font color="#ffff00">Let's confide in each other,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">really expose ourselves.</font>

264
00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:48,680
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, I'd love to. Thing is,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">though, Cuckoo, my back's agony</font>

265
00:13:48,680 --> 00:13:50,880
<font color="#ffffff">so I'll probably just go</font>
<font color="#ffffff">to my bedroom.</font>

266
00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:54,280
<font color="#ffffff">You stay here and chill out, man.</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Relax.</font>

267
00:13:56,320 --> 00:13:58,640
<font color="#ffffff">On your own. Oh!</font>

268
00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:06,880
<font color="#ffffff">HE SIGHS</font>

269
00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:12,880
<font color="#ffffff">MUSIC PLAYS: TRIBAL DRUMBEAT INTRO</font>

270
00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:19,360
<font color="#ffffff">ELECTRO BEAT, ACOUSTIC GUITAR</font>

271
00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:29,240
<font color="#ffffff">PSYCHEDELIC STRINGS</font>

272
00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:44,320
<font color="#00ffff"># Shake</font>

273
00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:46,200
<font color="#00ffff"># Shake</font>

274
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:55,680
<font color="#ffffff">Cuckoo.</font>

275
00:14:55,680 --> 00:14:57,280
<font color="#ffffff">Did you spike our meal?</font>

276
00:14:57,280 --> 00:14:59,040
<font color="#ffff00">I did not.</font>

277
00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:01,440
<font color="#ffff00">I promised Rach</font>
<font color="#ffff00">I'd stay away from all Class As</font>

278
00:15:01,440 --> 00:15:03,200
<font color="#ffff00">until I got my permanent visa.</font>

279
00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:05,000
<font color="#ffffff">Well...</font>

280
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:06,680
<font color="#ffffff">I feel sort of high.</font>

281
00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:10,040
<font color="#ffff00">You look kind of high, Ken.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">What did you take?</font>

282
00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:11,480
<font color="#ffffff">Just the painkillers.</font>

283
00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:18,480
<font color="#ffff00">Oh, yeah.</font>

284
00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:20,160
<font color="#ffff00">That's MDMA.</font>

285
00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:21,280
<font color="#ffffff">No!</font>

286
00:15:21,280 --> 00:15:23,640
<font color="#ffff00">It's good, too.</font>

287
00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,360
<font color="#ffffff">Good stuff? </font><font color="#ffff00">Dutch.</font>

288
00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:29,320
<font color="#ffff00">Yeah, they've got these sweet labs</font>
<font color="#ffff00">at Hoogezand-Sappemeer. </font><font color="#ffffff">Oh.</font>

289
00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:33,520
<font color="#ffff00">Whoo! Check out that aftertaste.</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Head is going! </font><font color="#ffffff">Nice, yeah?</font>

290
00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:36,920
<font color="#ffff00">And going. And going down smooth.</font>

291
00:15:36,920 --> 00:15:39,360
<font color="#ffff00">Oh, Ken,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">we are in for a big one.</font>

292
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:41,480
<font color="#ffff00">I'm just going to grab</font>
<font color="#ffff00">this second guy.</font>

293
00:15:41,480 --> 00:15:45,280
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, but Cuckoo, I haven't been high</font>
<font color="#ffffff">since Thatcher went out.</font>

294
00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:48,200
<font color="#ffffff">Must've been Dylan. Dylan!</font>

295
00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:50,160
<font color="#ffffff">Hmm. That's weird.</font>

296
00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:53,040
<font color="#ffffff">I feel no anger whatsoever.</font>

297
00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:54,760
<font color="#ffff00">Ken Bingsley, just relax,</font>

298
00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:57,960
<font color="#ffff00">because we are about to go</font>
<font color="#ffff00">on a beautiful journey together</font>

299
00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,800
<font color="#ffff00">and everything's going to be fine.</font>

300
00:15:59,800 --> 00:16:01,400
<font color="#ffffff">Promise me one thing, Cuckoo.</font>

301
00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:02,920
<font color="#ffffff">Whatever happens,</font>

302
00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:05,720
<font color="#ffffff">we have to make sure</font>
<font color="#ffffff">we don't do anything stupid.</font>

303
00:16:05,720 --> 00:16:07,440
<font color="#ffff00">I can't make you that promise.</font>

304
00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:09,120
<font color="#ffffff">And I don't care!</font>

305
00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,640
<font color="#ffff00">Oh! Hello.</font>

306
00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:16,160
<font color="#ffff00">And so...</font>

307
00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:17,840
<font color="#ffff00">it begins!</font>

308
00:16:17,840 --> 00:16:20,440
<font color="#ffffff">I'm quite frightened!</font>

309
00:16:23,280 --> 00:16:25,240
<font color="#ffffff">DOORBELL RINGS</font>

310
00:16:30,880 --> 00:16:32,320
<font color="#ffffff">Steve!</font>

311
00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:35,840
<font color="#ffffff">Lorna's out. Cuckoo's been giving me</font>
<font color="#ffffff">a lovely massage.</font>

312
00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:38,080
<font color="#00ffff">Here are those painkillers.</font>

313
00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:39,520
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, thanks!</font>

314
00:16:40,760 --> 00:16:42,600
<font color="#ffff00">Hey, it's Steve!</font>

315
00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:44,320
<font color="#ffff00">It's tiny little Steve!</font>

316
00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:46,560
<font color="#ffff00">Hey! </font><font color="#00ffff">Are you having a good time?</font>

317
00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:47,840
<font color="#ffffff">Yeah! </font><font color="#ffff00">Yeah.</font>

318
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,040
<font color="#ffffff">Do you want a massage?</font>

319
00:16:50,040 --> 00:16:51,520
<font color="#00ffff">No... I'm all right.</font>

320
00:16:51,520 --> 00:16:53,960
<font color="#ffffff">You should. </font><font color="#00ffff">I've got a judo class.</font>

321
00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:56,640
<font color="#ffffff">He's got magic hands. </font><font color="#ffff00">Ken...</font>
<font color="#ffffff">I don't mind.</font>

322
00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:58,760
<font color="#ffffff">I feel like I've been a bit greedy.</font>

323
00:16:58,760 --> 00:17:01,640
<font color="#00ffff">See you another time, Ken.</font>
<font color="#ffffff">OK, bye, Steve.</font>

324
00:17:01,640 --> 00:17:04,160
<font color="#ffffff">Safe journey.</font>

325
00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:06,160
<font color="#ffffff">Great guy. </font><font color="#ffff00">I like him.</font>

326
00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:09,560
<font color="#ffffff">As I was saying to Zeb,</font>

327
00:17:09,560 --> 00:17:12,160
<font color="#ffffff">when he finished with</font>
<font color="#ffffff">that last girlfriend of his...</font>

328
00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:15,440
<font color="#ffffff">What was she, Zeb? A model?</font>
<font color="#00ffff">A lab assistant.</font>

329
00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:19,440
<font color="#ffffff">You know, you might have thought</font>
<font color="#ffffff">she was "the one"... </font><font color="#00ffff">I didn't.</font>

330
00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:22,240
<font color="#ffffff">..but at this early age,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">you don't really know, do you?</font>

331
00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:23,640
<font color="#ffffff">Don't you think, Rachel?</font>

332
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:25,480
<font color="#00ff00">I think you know if it's real love.</font>

333
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:28,240
<font color="#ffffff">Come on, Rachel,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">have some more drink.</font>

334
00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:31,720
<font color="#ffffff">Didn't, er...</font>

335
00:17:31,720 --> 00:17:34,200
<font color="#ffffff">you and Zeb snog once at a party?</font>

336
00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:36,200
<font color="#ffff00">Connie!</font>

337
00:17:36,200 --> 00:17:38,440
<font color="#ffffff">We can talk about it here, can't we?</font>

338
00:17:38,440 --> 00:17:41,720
<font color="#ffffff">I mean we're all friends,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">just chatting and having chemistry.</font>

339
00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:44,440
<font color="#00ff00">Yeah, maybe when we were like, 14.</font>

340
00:17:44,440 --> 00:17:46,240
<font color="#00ffff">15, babe. You were 15.</font>

341
00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:50,960
<font color="#ffffff">Lorna. I think this might be a really</font>
<font color="#ffffff">good time to take the dishes.</font>

342
00:18:00,240 --> 00:18:04,720
<font color="#ffffff">MUSIC: "Geno"</font>
<font color="#ffffff">by Dexy's Midnight Runners</font>

343
00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:18,360
<font color="#ffff00">Rrrat-ta-ta! </font><font color="#ffffff">Rrrr!</font>

344
00:18:18,360 --> 00:18:19,680
<font color="#ffff00"># Dah-dah-dah! #</font>

345
00:18:23,320 --> 00:18:25,320
<font color="#ffff00">Holy shit, I love this band!</font>
<font color="#ffff00">Who is this?</font>

346
00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:28,440
<font color="#ffffff">It's Dexy's Midnight Runners.</font>
<font color="#ffffff">They're actually reuniting this year.</font>

347
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,880
<font color="#ffff00">Oh, my gosh, we should go,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">we should totally go! </font><font color="#ffffff">What?</font>

348
00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:33,880
<font color="#ffff00">Come on, when was the last time</font>
<font color="#ffff00">you saw them? </font><font color="#ffffff">About 20 years ago!</font>

349
00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:36,000
<font color="#ffffff">I haven't got any tickets.</font>

350
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:39,400
<font color="#ffff00">Let's get them right now. Let's go</font>
<font color="#ffff00">on the internet and get them now.</font>

351
00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:42,400
<font color="#ffffff">That is a brilliant idea. </font><font color="#ffff00">Yeah.</font>

352
00:18:42,400 --> 00:18:44,720
<font color="#ffff00">Oh, my God!</font>
<font color="#ffff00">We're going to see the Dexys.</font>

353
00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:46,280
<font color="#ffffff">I used to dress like them. </font><font color="#ffff00">Cool.</font>

354
00:18:46,280 --> 00:18:48,640
<font color="#ffffff">I think I've still got</font>
<font color="#ffffff">the costume in the attic.</font>

355
00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:53,240
<font color="#ffffff">Oh! Tickets are £200.</font>

356
00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:54,600
<font color="#ffff00">Get them.</font>

357
00:18:55,880 --> 00:18:57,880
<font color="#ffff00">And we should probably</font>
<font color="#ffff00">also buy a drum kit.</font>

358
00:18:59,520 --> 00:19:01,600
<font color="#ffffff">We should definitely buy a drum kit.</font>

359
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,680
<font color="#00ffff">This was supposed to be</font>
<font color="#00ffff">a girls' night.</font>

360
00:19:10,680 --> 00:19:13,160
<font color="#00ffff">Zeb is basically a boy.</font>

361
00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:15,960
<font color="#ffffff">Yes, but I thought,</font>

362
00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:18,560
<font color="#ffffff">obviously,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Cuckoo's not fitting in chez vous.</font>

363
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:22,920
<font color="#ffffff">Maybe Zeb's the honey to lure her</font>
<font color="#ffffff">away from that dreadful hippy.</font>

364
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,520
<font color="#00ffff">I don't want her lured away,</font>
<font color="#00ffff">I like Cuckoo.</font>

365
00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:27,840
<font color="#ffffff">He owns a potato van.</font>

366
00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:29,920
<font color="#ffffff">My Zeb's going to be</font>
<font color="#ffffff">a marine biologist.</font>

367
00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:32,840
<font color="#00ffff">Connie, she's married! </font><font color="#ffffff">We'll see.</font>

368
00:19:33,920 --> 00:19:36,520
<font color="#ffffff">She'll never be able</font>
<font color="#ffffff">to resist my Zeb.</font>

369
00:19:37,680 --> 00:19:39,360
<font color="#ffffff">He's gorgeous.</font>

370
00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:43,800
<font color="#ffffff">CUCKOO YELLS, CHEERS</font>

371
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,680
<font color="#ffff00">Go round it again!</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Again? We've got to pick Dylan up.</font>

372
00:19:46,680 --> 00:19:48,680
<font color="#ffff00">No, again and again and again!</font>

373
00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:51,960
<font color="#ffffff">BOTH: And again and again</font>
<font color="#ffffff">and again and again!</font>

374
00:19:54,320 --> 00:19:57,360
<font color="#ffffff">Woo-hooooo!</font>

375
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:01,240
<font color="#ffff00">OK, let's go in. </font><font color="#ffffff">I don't...</font>

376
00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:03,440
<font color="#ffffff">I don't know, Cuckoo.</font>

377
00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:06,920
<font color="#ffffff">It's just this little voice</font>
<font color="#ffffff">at the back of my head is saying</font>

378
00:20:06,920 --> 00:20:10,120
<font color="#ffffff">you know, like, well, they're 16,</font>

379
00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:12,360
<font color="#ffffff">I'm 45, and...</font>

380
00:20:12,360 --> 00:20:14,480
<font color="#ffffff">Well, I'm high on drugs</font>

381
00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,480
<font color="#ffffff">and maybe this isn't a good idea.</font>

382
00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:18,320
<font color="#ffff00">Ignore that, ignore that. </font><font color="#ffffff">Yeah?</font>

383
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:20,880
<font color="#ffff00">Ken, you work so hard.</font>

384
00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:24,000
<font color="#ffff00">You deserve this. </font><font color="#ffffff">Oh, yeah.</font>

385
00:20:25,320 --> 00:20:27,360
<font color="#ffffff">I do deserve this, don't I?</font>

386
00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:28,800
<font color="#ffff00">Yeah!</font>

387
00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:33,920
<font color="#ffff00">Has anyone ever told you</font>
<font color="#ffff00">you're really tall, Ken?</font>

388
00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:35,560
<font color="#ffffff">Yeah, sometimes. </font><font color="#ffff00">You are. </font><font color="#ffffff">Yeah!</font>

389
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:37,880
<font color="#ffffff">MUSIC: "Starships" by Nicki Minaj</font>

390
00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:40,600
<font color="#ffffff"># Starships were meant to fly</font>

391
00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:43,920
<font color="#ffffff"># Hands up and touch the sky</font>

392
00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:46,560
<font color="#ffff00">I'm still not feeling anything.</font>

393
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:49,600
<font color="#00ffff">Er, the dealer said</font>
<font color="#00ffff">they were made to look like Neurofen</font>

394
00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:51,240
<font color="#00ffff">to avoid detection.</font>

395
00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:52,920
<font color="#00ffff">It's definitely coming.</font>

396
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:55,000
<font color="#00ffff">I'm really feeling the music.</font>

397
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:59,040
<font color="#00ffff">I have this really strong urge</font>
<font color="#00ffff">to touch people.</font>

398
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:02,960
<font color="#00ffff">Neil? </font><font color="#00ff00">On your own, Dylan.</font>

399
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,560
<font color="#00ff00">I believe to make things square,</font>

400
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:07,600
<font color="#00ff00">I'm going to have to give you</font>
<font color="#00ff00">a massive kick in the nads. Lads,</font>

401
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:11,480
<font color="#00ff00">hold him. </font><font color="#00ffff">Neil, don't do this. Not</font>
<font color="#00ffff">my nads, Neil! Please not my nads!</font>

402
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:15,960
<font color="#00ff00">What you going to do? Call</font>
<font color="#00ff00">your daddy? </font><font color="#ffffff">Party! Let's do this!</font>

403
00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:17,600
<font color="#ffff00">We're here!</font>

404
00:21:17,600 --> 00:21:19,360
<font color="#ffffff">Ah! Dylan!</font>

405
00:21:19,360 --> 00:21:20,680
<font color="#ffffff">Yeah!</font>

406
00:21:22,880 --> 00:21:25,000
<font color="#ffffff">Zoe! It's you.</font>

407
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:26,880
<font color="#ffffff">Yeah!</font>

408
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:28,280
<font color="#ffff00">Is your dad high?</font>

409
00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:31,040
<font color="#00ffff">Oh, right, yeah, he's mashed.</font>

410
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:34,960
<font color="#ffffff">Hey. This is a nice place.</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Whose is it?</font>

411
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,840
<font color="#00ffff">It's Lauren's mum's and dad's.</font>

412
00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:38,280
<font color="#ffffff">You're right.</font>

413
00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:41,600
<font color="#ffffff">I think I came here</font>
<font color="#ffffff">for a dinner party once.</font>

414
00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:44,880
<font color="#ffffff">We had COUSCOUS!</font>

415
00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:47,600
<font color="#ffff00">Ken. It's all on! </font><font color="#ffffff">Yeah?</font>

416
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:50,280
<font color="#ffff00">It's here! Here, here, here!</font>

417
00:21:50,280 --> 00:21:52,520
<font color="#ffffff">Whoa! Party! Woo!</font>

418
00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:58,000
<font color="#ffffff">Hello, ladies and gentlemen!</font>

419
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:00,160
<font color="#ffff00">Come on, my people!</font>
<font color="#ffffff">We are your new DJs.</font>

420
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:03,160
<font color="#ffffff">We're about to rock</font>
<font color="#ffffff">this party right off!</font>

421
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:04,880
<font color="#ffff00">Thank you, DJ Ken,</font>

422
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:06,960
<font color="#ffff00">and we're going to play you</font>
<font color="#ffff00">a sick tune</font>

423
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:10,280
<font color="#ffff00">that's going to make all you bros</font>
<font color="#ffff00">and all you teenage hos</font>

424
00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:12,840
<font color="#ffff00">just lose your shit on the floor.</font>

425
00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:16,800
<font color="#ffffff">Check it!</font>

426
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:21,000
<font color="#ffffff">MUSIC: "Seven Days Too Long"</font>
<font color="#ffffff">by Dexy's Midnight Runners</font>

427
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:25,720
<font color="#ffffff"># The first time I called you, girl</font>
<font color="#ffffff">They said you weren't at home</font>

428
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:28,880
<font color="#ffffff"># And the second time I telephoned</font>

429
00:22:28,880 --> 00:22:31,080
<font color="#ffffff"># They all told me</font>
<font color="#ffffff">to leave you alone... #</font>

430
00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:33,760
<font color="#ffffff">CHEERING</font>

431
00:22:33,760 --> 00:22:36,360
<font color="#ffffff"># We had a lovers' quarrel</font>

432
00:22:36,360 --> 00:22:39,040
<font color="#ffffff"># Like all lovers do</font>

433
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:41,280
<font color="#ffffff"># I wanted to make up</font>

434
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:44,280
<font color="#ffffff"># It's only left to you now</font>

435
00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:49,680
<font color="#ffffff"># Cos seven days is too long</font>
<font color="#ffffff">without you, baby</font>

436
00:22:49,680 --> 00:22:51,360
<font color="#ffffff"># Come on back to me</font>

437
00:22:51,360 --> 00:22:56,560
<font color="#ffffff"># Seven days is too long</font>
<font color="#ffffff">without you, baby</font>

438
00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:58,440
<font color="#ffffff"># Come on back to me</font>

439
00:22:58,440 --> 00:23:00,560
<font color="#ffffff"># I refuse to break up</font>

440
00:23:00,560 --> 00:23:04,280
<font color="#ffffff"># But I'm too weak to fight</font>

441
00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:06,080
<font color="#ffffff"># And our love is too strong... #</font>

442
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:09,280
<font color="#ffff00">Mum said you got married?</font>

443
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:10,360
<font color="#00ff00">Yeah.</font>

444
00:23:10,360 --> 00:23:12,200
<font color="#ffff00">You disappoint me, Rachel.</font>

445
00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:15,120
<font color="#ffff00">I could never agree to</font>
<font color="#ffff00">letting anyone tie me down.</font>

446
00:23:15,120 --> 00:23:18,160
<font color="#00ff00">Well, I wouldn't worry about it.</font>
<font color="#00ff00">Has anyone ever wanted to?</font>

447
00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:19,440
<font color="#ffff00">Touche!</font>

448
00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:25,680
<font color="#ffff00">You know, our parents kind of</font>
<font color="#ffff00">always wanted US to get married.</font>

449
00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:27,480
<font color="#ffff00">Maybe's there's something in it.</font>

450
00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:30,400
<font color="#00ff00">Maybe. Except for the fact</font>
<font color="#00ff00">you're a total dick.</font>

451
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:33,080
<font color="#ffff00">No.</font>

452
00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:35,120
<font color="#ffff00">I HAVE a total dick.</font>

453
00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:40,320
<font color="#ffff00">Doo-doo doo-doo doo-doo doo-doo doo.</font>

454
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:42,920
<font color="#ffff00">Ow!</font>

455
00:23:42,920 --> 00:23:47,480
<font color="#ffff00">Bet you wish your husband</font>
<font color="#ffff00">was hot like me,</font>

456
00:23:47,480 --> 00:23:51,720
<font color="#ffff00">bet you wish your husband</font>
<font color="#ffff00">was a freak like me.</font>

457
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:54,040
<font color="#ffff00">Oh! Don't you?</font>

458
00:23:55,560 --> 00:23:57,000
<font color="#ffff00">(Don't you?)</font>

459
00:23:57,000 --> 00:24:00,000
<font color="#00ff00">Mum? We're leaving!</font>

460
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:02,360
<font color="#ffffff">MUSIC: "Bonkers" by Dizzee Rascal</font>

461
00:24:02,360 --> 00:24:04,200
<font color="#ffffff"># Everything in my life</font>
<font color="#ffffff">ain't what it seems</font>

462
00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:07,800
<font color="#ffffff"># I wake up just to go back to sleep</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Act shallow but I'm in too deep</font>

463
00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:11,160
<font color="#ffffff"># Only care about sex and violence</font>
<font color="#ffffff">Heavy bass line is my kind of silence</font>

464
00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:14,640
<font color="#ffffff"># Everyone says I've got to get</font>
<font color="#ffffff">a grip but sanity gave me the slip</font>

465
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:16,400
<font color="#00ffff"># Bonkers</font>

466
00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:18,560
<font color="#ffffff"># Some people think I'm bonkers... #</font>

467
00:24:18,560 --> 00:24:20,280
<font color="#00ff00">He's hurt! Turn off the music!</font>

468
00:24:21,360 --> 00:24:22,680
<font color="#ffffff">MUSIC STOPS</font>

469
00:24:24,240 --> 00:24:26,160
<font color="#ffff00">Kenderston?</font>

470
00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:29,720
<font color="#ffffff">Yeah!</font>

471
00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:32,040
<font color="#ffff00">He's alive!</font>

472
00:24:33,200 --> 00:24:37,360
<font color="#ffffff"># Some people think I'm bonkers... #</font>

473
00:24:37,360 --> 00:24:40,600
<font color="#ffffff">ALL: </font><font color="#00ffff">DJ Ken! DJ Ken!</font>

474
00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:43,640
<font color="#ffff00">And that was my first time,</font>

475
00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:45,360
<font color="#ffff00">under the skies of Djibouti.</font>

476
00:24:45,360 --> 00:24:50,720
<font color="#ffff00">Afterwards, we pulled up our grass</font>
<font color="#ffff00">skirts and went our separate ways.</font>

477
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:52,400
<font color="#ffff00">I to my colony,</font>

478
00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:54,680
<font color="#ffff00">her, her hotel.</font>

479
00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:56,880
<font color="#ffff00">Him...</font>

480
00:24:56,880 --> 00:24:59,360
<font color="#ffff00">Zimbabwe,</font>
<font color="#ffff00">and his presidential duties.</font>

481
00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:02,520
<font color="#ffffff">I love Lorna.</font>

482
00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:07,280
<font color="#ffffff">I'm going to text her,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">and tell her she's my one and only.</font>

483
00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:08,720
<font color="#ffffff">And I want another baby.</font>

484
00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:10,160
<font color="#ffff00">Hmm. Smart. </font><font color="#ffffff">Yeah.</font>

485
00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:13,280
<font color="#ffffff">Cuckoo, promise me,</font>

486
00:25:13,280 --> 00:25:14,880
<font color="#ffffff">when we're sober,</font>

487
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:17,480
<font color="#ffffff">you and I will still be best friends.</font>

488
00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:18,960
<font color="#ffff00">Ken. I promise</font>

489
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:23,960
<font color="#ffff00">and I also promise that we will get</font>
<font color="#ffff00">messed up like this every Saturday.</font>

490
00:25:23,960 --> 00:25:25,280
<font color="#ffffff">You are on.</font>

491
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:30,440
<font color="#ffff00">Smile,</font>

492
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:33,760
<font color="#ffff00">and the world smiles with you.</font>

493
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:39,960
<font color="#ffffff">Nina!</font>

494
00:25:39,960 --> 00:25:42,880
<font color="#ffff00">You're ready, Ken.</font>

495
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:44,600
<font color="#ffff00">Go to her.</font>

496
00:25:50,560 --> 00:25:52,600
<font color="#ffff00">He's going to be great.</font>

497
00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:54,280
<font color="#ffffff">Nina!</font>

498
00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:55,480
<font color="#00ff00">Ken...</font>

499
00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:56,840
<font color="#00ff00">No, no!</font>

500
00:25:56,840 --> 00:25:58,600
<font color="#00ff00">Don't get in the car! No.</font>

501
00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:01,120
<font color="#ffffff">I'm getting in! </font><font color="#00ff00">No! No...</font>

502
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:08,440
<font color="#00ff00">Listen, I'm just picking Neil up.</font>
<font color="#00ff00">I'd prefer to wait alone, thanks.</font>

503
00:26:08,440 --> 00:26:10,200
<font color="#ffffff">I'll wait with you. We can talk.</font>

504
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:13,560
<font color="#00ff00">No, Ken. We have nothing</font>
<font color="#00ff00">to talk about. </font><font color="#ffffff">We do!</font>

505
00:26:13,560 --> 00:26:14,960
<font color="#ffffff">Nina, listen,</font>

506
00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:16,440
<font color="#ffffff">I love the Lib Dems</font>

507
00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:19,120
<font color="#ffffff">and I love Lichfield,</font>
<font color="#ffffff">and I love the council.</font>

508
00:26:19,120 --> 00:26:22,880
<font color="#ffffff">And I...love...you.</font>

509
00:26:22,880 --> 00:26:26,120
<font color="#ffffff">There. I've said it.</font>

510
00:26:26,120 --> 00:26:29,000
<font color="#00ff00">Well, Ken, that's all very well...</font>

511
00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:30,840
<font color="#ffffff">Nina!</font>

512
00:26:30,840 --> 00:26:34,800
<font color="#ffffff">There are all these forces</font>
<font color="#ffffff">in the world, trying to divide us,</font>

513
00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:37,320
<font color="#ffffff">trying to convince us</font>
<font color="#ffffff">that we're not the same.</font>

514
00:26:37,320 --> 00:26:40,480
<font color="#ffffff">Are we going to let them? No! Why?</font>

515
00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:41,800
<font color="#ffffff">WHY?</font>

516
00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:43,560
<font color="#ffffff">Because we...</font>

517
00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:48,240
<font color="#ffffff">..are the Liberal Democrats.</font>

518
00:26:49,360 --> 00:26:52,680
<font color="#00ff00">Well, you know, Ken,</font>
<font color="#00ff00">that's really heartfelt.</font>

519
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:56,000
<font color="#00ff00">Look, maybe I might have</font>
<font color="#00ff00">overreacted. So...</font>

520
00:27:00,120 --> 00:27:01,720
<font color="#00ff00">Oh! </font><font color="#ffffff">Oh...</font>

521
00:27:03,720 --> 00:27:05,640
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, it's all right.</font>

522
00:27:05,640 --> 00:27:06,960
<font color="#ffffff">I've got a tissue.</font>

523
00:27:06,960 --> 00:27:09,400
<font color="#00ff00">Oh! Oh...</font>

524
00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:13,560
<font color="#00ffff">I am so sorry, love.</font>

525
00:27:13,560 --> 00:27:16,400
<font color="#00ffff">I had no idea</font>
<font color="#00ffff">what Connie was planning.</font>

526
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:19,360
<font color="#00ff00">Mum, nobody takes</font>
<font color="#00ff00">me and Cuckoo seriously.</font>

527
00:27:19,360 --> 00:27:22,080
<font color="#00ffff">Nonsense! I do.</font>

528
00:27:22,080 --> 00:27:23,560
<font color="#00ffff">Your dad does.</font>

529
00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:25,560
<font color="#00ff00">Dad doesn't even like him.</font>

530
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:29,040
<font color="#00ff00">Never spends any time with him</font>
<font color="#00ff00">and he always avoids talking to him.</font>

531
00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:30,920
<font color="#00ffff">That is not true.</font>

532
00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:32,600
<font color="#00ffff">It's not.</font>

533
00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:34,040
<font color="#ffff00">We're back!</font>

534
00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:36,520
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, Rachel!</font>

535
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:40,160
<font color="#ffffff">You have married the best man in</font>
<font color="#ffffff">the whole universe, do you hear me?</font>

536
00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:42,120
<font color="#ffffff">The best man in the whole universe.</font>

537
00:27:42,120 --> 00:27:43,920
<font color="#00ff00">Thanks, Dad!</font>

538
00:27:46,240 --> 00:27:47,960
<font color="#00ffff">I got your text message.</font>

539
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:50,160
<font color="#00ffff">Though it is no</font>
<font color="#00ffff">to the extra baby, Ken.</font>

540
00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:52,720
<font color="#ffffff">Oh. I don't know what</font>
<font color="#ffffff">you're talking about.</font>

541
00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:55,520
<font color="#00ffff">Oh. Is that blood?</font>

542
00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:57,040
<font color="#ffffff">Yes.</font>

543
00:27:58,200 --> 00:27:59,840
<font color="#ffffff">My name's Ken.</font>

544
00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:01,760
<font color="#ffffff">Lorn. </font><font color="#00ffff">Yeah?</font>

545
00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:03,600
<font color="#ffffff">I was sick all over Nina Morgan.</font>

546
00:28:04,640 --> 00:28:07,880
<font color="#00ffff">Right. That's pretty bad, isn't it?</font>

547
00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:09,760
<font color="#ffffff">No, she was fine with it.</font>

548
00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:12,200
<font color="#ffffff">I gave her a big hug</font>
<font color="#ffffff">and she said it was fine,</font>

549
00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:15,280
<font color="#ffffff">and I should carry on</font>
<font color="#ffffff">with my evening. It's fine!</font>

550
00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:19,960
<font color="#ffffff">Yeah!</font>

551
00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:25,000
<font color="#ffffff">It's fine!</font>

552
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:26,560
<font color="#ffffff">It's fine.</font>

553
00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:29,760
<font color="#ffffff">It's fine!</font>

554
00:28:38,920 --> 00:28:40,680
<font color="#ffffff">Oh, bollocks.</font>

555
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:04,080
<font color="#ffffff">Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd</font>