1
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:12,000
# Who do you think You are kidding, Mr Hitler, If you think we're on the run?

2
00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:18,000
# We are the boys Who will stop your little game,

3
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:23,000
# We are the boys Who will make you think again.

4
00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:29,000
# cos who do you think You are kidding, Mr Hitler,

5
00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:32,000
# If you think old England's done?

6
00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:37,000
# Mr Brown goes off to town on the 8.21,

7
00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:42,000
# But he comes home each evening And he's ready with his gun.

8
00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:47,000
# So who do you think You are kidding, Mr Hitler,

9
00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:53,000
# If you think old England's done? #

10
00:00:56,000 --> 00:01:00,000
Now, tonight, Captain Mainwaring is going to be a little late,

11
00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:07,000
so he's asked me to take the training programme. Can we have a smoke?

12
00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:11,000
I'd rather you didn't. All right.

13
00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:17,000
We're going to do some stalking: how to creep up on an enemy sentry.

14
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:21,000
Taffy's the biggest "creeper" here!

15
00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:23,000
Settle down.

16
00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:25,000
I am an expert stalker.

17
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:30,000
I was one of the finest stalkers in the Highlands!

18
00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:33,000
^ And a chatterbox in the Lowlands(!)

19
00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:36,000
We want someone to creep up ON.

20
00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:40,000
I'd like to volunteer to be crept up on.

21
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:47,000
No, you always volunteer. We need someone else to be the enemy sentry.

22
00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:49,000
I'd like to be the enemy...

23
00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:55,000
We must give the others a chance. Godfrey, you be the enemy sentry.

24
00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:58,000
You need something to sit on...

25
00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:03,000
I volunteer to be sat on... Jones!

26
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:05,000
Get the chair from the office.

27
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:11,000
Frazer, you seem to know about this. Could you put us in the picture?

28
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:16,000
Aye, sir. PAY ATTENTION, EVERYBODY.

29
00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:24,000
Now, you approach your quarry from behind, and you always keep downwind of him.

30
00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:28,000
Why? So he doesnae get your scent.

31
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:35,000
Humans can't smell humans! You're not standing where I am! You can't talk to me like that!

32
00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:41,000
PAY ATTENTION!! Now, I'll give you a demonstration.

33
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,000
Stand back.

34
00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:48,000
I'm creeping up on the sentry.

35
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:53,000
Now, I'm picking my feet up and putting them doon very carefully.

36
00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:59,000
It's most important that you watch where you're putting your feet.

37
00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:04,000
Especially in a field of cows. Walker, please!

38
00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:13,000
You might step on a dry twig - SNAP! - and the enemy sentry would be at yer throat!

39
00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:21,000
Aaargh! Have you gone mad!? So always remember to watch where you put yer feet.

40
00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:26,000
Ah, thank you, Godfrey. Put it down.

41
00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:30,000
Now, will somebody blindfold him?

42
00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:38,000
I volunteer to blindfold him, sir! There's no need to get so fussed. But you keep leaving me out!

43
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:43,000
Oh, just do it and then spin him round.

44
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:49,000
This reminds me of playing Putting the Tail on the Donkey as a child.

45
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:56,000
That was a good game. They don't play games like that any more.

46
00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:59,000
And Postman's Knock and Sardines.

47
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:05,000
I didn't like Sardines. He didn't like Sardines. All right!

48
00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:12,000
Now, spread out and creep up on Godfrey.

49
00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:20,000
Godfrey, if you hear anything, spin round, point your finger and pretend to shoot him. Try it.

50
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:25,000
Pop.

51
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:29,000
Was that all right? Not quite(!)

52
00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:33,000
Right, are you all ready?

53
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:47,000
We've arrived, Mr Godfrey...

54
00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:55,000
Come on, Godfrey, come along! Oh, dear... I must have dropped off.

55
00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:01,000
I've had a tiring day at the clinic.

56
00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:04,000
I'm sure(!) I'LL be the sentry.

57
00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:10,000
I'll have the whistle... Just a minute! You'll strangle me!

58
00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:18,000
I'll blow for you. I'd be very grateful. I find that very difficult.

59
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:21,000
Right, everybody ready? Yes, sir.

60
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:26,000
There we are, sir. Now, then, ready to go. Right...

61
00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:29,000
Ready...

62
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:44,000
Bang!

63
00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:52,000
All right, I know I'm dead. I thought you were the platoon, sir.

64
00:05:52,000 --> 00:06:00,000
I didn't realise I was so heavy-footed(!) Can I see you in the office? Sir.

65
00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:05,000
Carry on, Jones. Sir. I'll take the chair this time!

66
00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:10,000
(Let's have a cup of tea. That's the best idea ye've had!)

67
00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:15,000
Everybody ready? Right, let's go.

68
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:33,000
Shut the door, Wilson, please. Sir.

69
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:42,000
Read this letter. Yes, sir... It's addressed to YOU. Read it.

70
00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:46,000
Why would Godfrey write to you...? You'll find out.

71
00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:52,000
"Dear sir, I regret that I must tender to you my resignation.

72
00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:58,000
"Owing to personal reasons, I can no longer remain a member of the platoon.

73
00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:05,000
"So I must ask you to accept my two weeks' notice as from now.

74
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:10,000
"Your obedient servant, Charles Godfrey."

75
00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:17,000
Pity. We'll miss him. What do you mean, "Miss him"!? He can't just leave like that!

76
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:20,000
But he's given you two weeks' notice.

77
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:24,000
This is WAR, not Sainsbury's!

78
00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:29,000
Get him in here to explain himself!

79
00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:35,000
Let's see that rota...

80
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:42,000
Monday: Number One section on patrol.

81
00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:50,000
2250: Godfrey puts on kettle. 2258: Godfrey makes tea ready for return of patrol at 2300.

82
00:07:50,000 --> 00:07:55,000
Tuesday: Number Three section on patrol at Novelty Rock Emporium.

83
00:07:55,000 --> 00:08:00,000
2330: Godfrey arrives at Emporium. 2350: makes tea for patrol.

84
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:05,000
No, I couldn't let HIM go. He's far too valuable.

85
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:08,000
KNOCK AT DOOR Come in.

86
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:16,000
You wanted to see me, sir? Yes, Godfrey, sit down. Thank you.

87
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:19,000
Don't go, Wilson. I may need you.

88
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:26,000
Godfrey, what's the meaning of this? I'm afraid it means I have to leave, sir.

89
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:31,000
You feel too old for active service?

90
00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:34,000
No, not really. What, then?

91
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:39,000
Well, the other morning I got up as usual to make early morning tea.

92
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:47,000
Till recently, we've had a very good tea from the Army and Navy Stores,

93
00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:50,000
but now we put up with anything.

94
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:57,000
I quite agree. Some of the stuff we've been getting is terrible...

95
00:08:57,000 --> 00:09:04,000
Do you mind!? What has this got to do with your leaving?

96
00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:08,000
Where was I? About to make the tea.

97
00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:17,000
Oh, yes. I went to the larder and I saw something which made me realise I couldn't carry on.

98
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:20,000
What on earth was that? A mouse.

99
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:22,000
A mouse!?

100
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:31,000
Yes. It had fallen into this pudding basin and was running round and round, trying to get out.

101
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:38,000
I knew I ought to kill it, because we've been infested by mice,

102
00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:44,000
but when I got hold of it I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

103
00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:50,000
What DID you do? I took it to the garden and let it go.

104
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:58,000
Godfrey, I'm still not clear what this has to do with your leaving the platoon.

105
00:09:58,000 --> 00:10:06,000
If I can't kill a mouse, how could I kill a German? So why did you join the Home Guard?

106
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:15,000
I thought it would be different from the last time. But we need every man we can get.

107
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:20,000
What do you mean, "Different from last time"?

108
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:26,000
I was a conscientious objector during the last war. I see... WHAT!?

109
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:29,000
A conscientious objector.

110
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:37,000
A conchie...!? You mean... you didn't want to fight...!? Not really, sir.

111
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:43,000
Well...I can't believe this, Godfrey, I just can't believe it!

112
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:48,000
I think...you'd better go home.

113
00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:54,000
You don't want me to do anything more for you tonight? No, just go!

114
00:10:56,000 --> 00:11:04,000
I'm sorry about this, Captain. I can only hope that my service has given every satisfaction.

115
00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:07,000
(Get out!)

116
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:16,000
Don't you think you're being a little harsh, sir? "Harsh," Wilson!? Yes...

117
00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:23,000
We've a damn conchie in our midst! A man must follow his own inclinations.

118
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:28,000
Where would the country be if we ALL felt like that!?

119
00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:35,000
Suppose you visited Mrs Pike and you found a Nazi stormtrooper forcing his attentions on her.

120
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:42,000
How would you feel? Really, sir! That strikes home, doesn't it?

121
00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:44,000
Rather an old-fashioned argument.

122
00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:49,000
So I'm old-fashioned! I can't stand cranks!

123
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:57,000
Imagine, a man not wanting to fight! It isn't normal! So what are you going to do, sir?

124
00:11:57,000 --> 00:12:03,000
I WANT to give him the Rogues' March! Rogues' March...?

125
00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:05,000
They used to do it in the Army.

126
00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:10,000
They paraded cowards in front of the men,

127
00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:16,000
tore off their epaulettes, broke their sword in half... Oooh!

128
00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:21,000
But Godfrey's wearing a denim suit.

129
00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:24,000
All right! Get the men on parade.

130
00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:32,000
What will you tell them? The truth! I can tear his epaulettes off verbally, if not physically!

131
00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:35,000
# I'm nobody's baby... #

132
00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:42,000
What's the big mystery, Jonesy? All I know is that Mr Mainwaring said to come on parade.

133
00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:48,000
I think he's got a special announcement... Where's Godfrey?

134
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:54,000
He went home half an hour ago. I think he had tears in his eyes.

135
00:12:54,000 --> 00:13:01,000
Oh, if I was Mainwaring, I'd give him something to cry about!

136
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:05,000
Right... Platoon, ATTEN'SHUN!

137
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,000
At ease.

138
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:24,000
In the 14 months that we've been together...

139
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:45,000
In these 14 months, we've put up with many trials and tribulations...

140
00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:53,000
What is it!? Will you be long? I have something to say to the men!

141
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:01,000
As I was saying...

142
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:11,000
Many trials and tribulations... Why's he standing on a box?

143
00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:18,000
Well... Is that the only way he can get the men to look up to him(!)

144
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:22,000
Sh! SH!

145
00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:24,000
Yes, sh!

146
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:27,000
Long hours...

147
00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:34,000
Don't ssshhh me! I'm here to ask you about the Civil Defence exercise on Saturday!

148
00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:37,000
You'll have to wait. We'll see!

149
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:43,000
..for the constant threat of invasion.

150
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:46,000
We do it freely, seeking no reward.

151
00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:57,000
The only reward we may have could only come from some higher authority, up above...

152
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:19,000
# There was a brave old Scotchman At the Battle of Waterloo.

153
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:24,000
# The wind blew up his petticoats And showed his... #

154
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:29,000
Have a nice patrol, Mr Frazer?

155
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:34,000
The word is SCOTSman. Scotch is something you drink.

156
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:41,000
I cannae understand why you English are so obsessed with what we wear under the kilt.

157
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:49,000
Oh, it's chilly out tonight. I see you made the tea. There's a good boy.

158
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:52,000
HOWLING WIND

159
00:15:55,000 --> 00:16:01,000
Good job you're not wearing your kilt, Taffy.

160
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:06,000
You might feel a bit draughty round the old...

161
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:13,000
Mention the word kilt again and your nose will feel draughty! Sorry I spoke!

162
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:19,000
What IS this!? Don't you like it? It's not as good as Mr Godfrey's.

163
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:28,000
Don't mention that name to me! To think we've had a conchie in our ranks all this time!

164
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:35,000
What'll happen to him? Mr Mainwaring will keep him in the platoon till he finds a replacement.

165
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:37,000
Disgraceful!

166
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:42,000
My mum says men should be men.

167
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,000
I heard her telling Uncle Arthur.

168
00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:50,000
I feel sorry for the old boy. What do you reckon, Jonesy?

169
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:57,000
I've been a soldier all me life. I know nothing about conscientious objectors.

170
00:16:57,000 --> 00:17:03,000
I remember when I was on the North West Frontier... Frontier of where?

171
00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:11,000
Golders Green(!) The North West Frontier of India! We was surrounded by Pathans.

172
00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:16,000
Those black men with turbans? No, they're the same colour as you.

173
00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:19,000
They're green!? No...!

174
00:17:19,000 --> 00:17:26,000
Anyway, they got cruel faces and hawk-like noses and cruel little beady eyes.

175
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:32,000
Like Taffy here. Yes, he is a bit like a Pathan.

176
00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:38,000
I'm a Scotsman born and bred! Maybe his old man had a bike(!)

177
00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:43,000
Anyway, we was surrounded by thousands of Pathans...

178
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:48,000
Are they the ones who don't like it "up 'em"? Oh, shut up!

179
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:58,000
Am I too late to make the tea? I didn't think you were coming. I've already made it.

180
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:06,000
There's an awfy queer smell in here! Come on, boys, it's time to get back on patrol.

181
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:12,000
Would anyone like some cake? Mr Jones? Yes, I...

182
00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:19,000
No, thanks, I'm not very hungry.

183
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:22,000
Thank you, Mr Godfrey.

184
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:26,000
Come on!

185
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:44,000
# It's a blue world without you... #

186
00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:53,000
Not too many, Bill. You know what a fusspot Mainwaring is.

187
00:18:53,000 --> 00:19:00,000
I hope this smoke test isn't too much for them. I'll keep my eye on them.

188
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:05,000
We don't want them looking like kippers(!) Here they come.

189
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:10,000
Platoon, halt! All right, fall out.

190
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:14,000
We're ready for you. Thank you. Gather round.

191
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:21,000
We're doing "rescuing an unconscious person from a burning building."

192
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:27,000
Smoke's going through this pipe 'ere into the hut 'ere.

193
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:33,000
Inside the hut are sacks filled with straw, representing bodies.

194
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:39,000
Take the bodies out through the flap, up the ladder and over the wall.

195
00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:43,000
We'll suffocate in that smoke!

196
00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:48,000
Not if you do it properly. I'll show you. Right...

197
00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:57,000
- Let us pray! - You trying to be funny!? Walker!

198
00:19:57,000 --> 00:20:01,000
Get your nose flat on the floor...

199
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:09,000
close your mouth, then hnrghh hmng grhrhnga, hmbngh arh hmngr hngimn angghmm.

200
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:11,000
Is that clear?

201
00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:17,000
Do NOT take your nose off the floor.

202
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:20,000
And you go along like this.

203
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:25,000
He's been practising!

204
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:30,000
Sir... Yes? What if your nose is longer than two inches?

205
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:34,000
It is NOT longer than two inches!

206
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:39,000
He doesn't mean YOUR nose. He means a sort of hypothetical nose.

207
00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:46,000
No, no, I didn't mean Mr Mainwaring's nose, no, no. No, no, I didn't...

208
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:51,000
Mr Hodges, is the floor of the hut wood?

209
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:58,000
Yes. Why? My mum would object if I got a splinter in my nose.

210
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:02,000
Damn sissy! Don't worry, lad.

211
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:05,000
I'LL PUT A BLOODY CARPET DOWN!

212
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:11,000
Warden, don't swear at my men! They'd make anyone swear!

213
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:19,000
A lot of people would give their right arms just to go through a smoke-filled hut!

214
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:27,000
My colleague here will count you off as you come through.

215
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:33,000
If one of you don't appear, I shall quickly get you out.

216
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:37,000
Right, inside, men. Very nice(!)

217
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:43,000
Don't forget, there's 17 to come through. Righto.

218
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:50,000
I'll go first. I won't ask my men to do anything I can't do. Is that wise, sir? Wilson...!

219
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:54,000
Just get the men ready. Right, sir.

220
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:57,000
Number one coming through. Right.

221
00:21:57,000 --> 00:22:03,000
Can I be the next one to go through, Sergeant? Yes, off you go, Jones.

222
00:22:03,000 --> 00:22:06,000
There you go.

223
00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:22,000
I do apologise, sir.

224
00:22:25,000 --> 00:22:30,000
You've ruined all my counting! There's not enough smoke in there!

225
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:34,000
CANCEL THE FIRST ONE, BILL!

226
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:39,000
CORPORAL! SIR? Start taking the men through.

227
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:41,000
Sir!

228
00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:49,000
You'll asphyxiate them, you maniac! If a job's worth doing, it's worth doing well. OH!

229
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:56,000
Right, Mr Hodges. Right, come on, then.

230
00:22:56,000 --> 00:23:01,000
Come on, quickly! That's it. Off you go.

231
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:04,000
That's it. What have we here?

232
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OOOOOOOOOHHHHH!!

233
00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:20,000
What's your game!?

234
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:29,000
Why are you going back!? I forgot me little straw man.

235
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Come back 'ere! Just a minute!

236
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:34,000
Oooohhh!!

237
00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:37,000
Never tangle with an old butcher!

238
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:44,000
OHH...! What are you playing at!? I've got a splinter on my nose!

239
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:48,000
ARGUING

240
00:23:48,000 --> 00:23:50,000
Come on!

241
00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:57,000
'Ere, there's much more smoke in there than usual.

242
00:23:57,000 --> 00:24:01,000
It's that maniac Mainwaring!

243
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:05,000
Hurry up! Do me a favour - clear off!

244
00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:12,000
Through you go, Pike. You next, Walker - no smoking in there!

245
00:24:17,000 --> 00:24:22,000
You're not getting out of this one, Godfrey. I'm not trying to, sir.

246
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:29,000
Remember, I'm right behind you. None of your damn conchie tricks!

247
00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:35,000
It's the one with the scarf! Where to now? Over the ladder.

248
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Come on, you, come on!

249
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:49,000
Only two more? That's right.

250
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You go and I'll stop 'ere. Right.

251
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:57,000
What have we got here, then? It looks like Ben Gunn!

252
00:24:57,000 --> 00:25:04,000
All right? Where's Captain Mainwaring? Just behind me.

253
00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:08,000
I'll go over the wall and you wait here for him.

254
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:24,000
Are you all right, Captain...?

255
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:34,000
Mr Hodges, Captain Mainwaring hasn't come through yet!

256
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:39,000
Mr Hodges!

257
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:48,000
All right, Captain, I'm coming.

258
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# Faithful forever... #

259
00:25:54,000 --> 00:26:01,000
He'll be fine in a day or two, Miss Godfrey. See that he gets plenty of rest.

260
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:09,000
Yes, thank you, Doctor. Can Mr Mainwaring come in now? Yes, of course. Goodbye.

261
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:12,000
Goodbye, Doctor. Goodbye.

262
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:16,000
He'll see you now, Captain. Thank you.

263
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:22,000
Feeling better?

264
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,000
Much better.

265
00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:38,000
Some nice strengthening sweetbreads for you. Thank you.

266
00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:41,000
^ I brought ye a bottle o' whisky.

267
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:45,000
^ And some tea.

268
00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:49,000
Army and Navy? No, from a mate in the RAF.

269
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:56,000
Aren't you going to thank him for saving your life? Of course I am!

270
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Give the officer some room. Back...

271
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:09,000
I may have said some harsh things, but deep down we're all very...

272
00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:15,000
What's that photograph of you in uniform? That was the last war.

273
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:21,000
Wait a minute...you're wearing the Military Medal! That's right.

274
00:27:21,000 --> 00:27:28,000
But you said you were a damn... a conscientious objector! I was. So how could you win the MM!?

275
00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:33,000
He volunteered for the Medical Corps.

276
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:39,000
At the Somme, he went out under heavy fire and saved several lives.

277
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:43,000
It wasn't that heavy...

278
00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:50,000
I'm sure we're very sorry to have sat upon you in very strong judgment, Mr Godfrey.

279
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:55,000
Speaking for mysel', I never doubted ye for a single minute.

280
00:27:55,000 --> 00:28:01,000
He could be OUR medical orderly. What a good idea. Thank you.

281
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:10,000
From now on you are appointed medical orderly to the platoon. Thank you very much.

282
00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:16,000
We mustn't tire him any more. Don't do anything I wouldn't!

283
00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:18,000
Nice of you to come.

284
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:22,000
FOND FAREWELLS

285
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:32,000
There's one thing I still don't understand. Oh, what's that?

286
00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:37,000
Why do you never wear your medals? Oh, they seemed rather ostentatious.

287
00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:39,000
Ostentatious!?

288
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:47,000
If I'd won the MM, I'd have worn it for the whole world to see.

289
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:50,000
Yes, but you LOOK like a hero.

290
00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:55,000
You can't always go by appearances. No...

291
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:49,000
Subtitles by Chas Donaldson BBC Scotland 1992

292
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:07,000
Three seasons of extreme survival for the animals of Yellowstone.

293
00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:09,000
Starts with The Wildest Winter...