1 00:00:02,640 --> 00:00:07,400 # Who do you think you are kidding Mr Hitler 2 00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:12,280 # If you think we're on the run? 3 00:00:12,280 --> 00:00:17,200 # We are the boys who will stop your little game 4 00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:22,200 # We are the boys who will make you think again 5 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:26,960 # Cos who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler 6 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:31,680 # If you think old England's done? 7 00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:36,560 # Mr Brown goes off to town on the 8.21 8 00:00:36,560 --> 00:00:41,280 # But he comes home each evening and he's ready with his gun 9 00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:46,480 # So who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler 10 00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:51,400 # If you think old England's done? # 11 00:00:56,280 --> 00:01:03,240 NOISY RABBLE Ladies and gentlemen, order. Order, please! 12 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:07,280 Can we get on? We've been here two hours! 13 00:01:07,280 --> 00:01:14,560 Well, I think we're all agreed on the poster. I think it's very tasteful and artistic. 14 00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:21,320 It needs more colour. You can't have colours in wartime, Mrs Yeatman. 15 00:01:21,320 --> 00:01:28,200 Now the climax of the "Wings For Victory" Week will be the grand march past on Saturday. 16 00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:36,640 The Mayor, standing on the podium, will take the salute, along with myself and other council officers. 17 00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:40,960 First, the Sea-Scouts Drum and Bugle Band. 18 00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:47,040 Then a Keep Fit display by the Ladies' Netball Team... 19 00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:50,240 led by Mrs Yeatman. 20 00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:59,040 Point of order, Mr Chairman. Are they going to wear dresses or shorts? 21 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:02,800 They'll wear shorts, of course. You can't do PT in dresses. 22 00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:09,840 Ladies' legs can lead to ribaldry among the crowd. I shouldn't like my sister, Dolly, to be shocked. 23 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:14,560 What's the matter with a bit of leg? Lovely! 24 00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:17,800 Those white thighs... 25 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:23,360 Gleaming in the sunlight. 26 00:02:25,040 --> 00:02:27,120 What about them little ankle socks, too? 27 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:28,680 Little ankle socks. 28 00:02:28,680 --> 00:02:31,200 Can we raise the level of this discussion, please? 29 00:02:31,200 --> 00:02:33,840 - I quite agree, Your Reverence. - Be quiet, Mr Yeatman. 30 00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:41,600 - Keep your dirty old men in order, Mr Mainwaring. - I'm quite indifferent to this discussion. 31 00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:45,360 - He's sulking! - I am not sulking. 32 00:02:45,360 --> 00:02:52,240 - It's because you aren't Chairman. - If I had been Chairman we wouldn't have been here two hours. 33 00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:54,360 No. We'd have been here four hours! 34 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:59,720 Now, after that we have the display of Morris dancing. 35 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:07,720 - Are there any more suggestions? - Mr Chairman, through the Chair, can I take the floor? 36 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:12,320 Are we all in agreement that Mr Jones can take the floor? 37 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:17,160 GENERAL ASSENT Mr Jones, the floor is yours. 38 00:03:17,160 --> 00:03:22,360 Thank you... Ladies and gentlemen, this is the Litter Bug. 39 00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:30,880 This is the Squander Bug. Why don't two of us dress up as these bugs? 40 00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:36,600 The Litter Bug can throw paper and the Squander Bug can throw money. 41 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:39,400 Hey, hold on...hold on! 42 00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:42,240 Who's supplying the money? 43 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,240 It's going to be imitation money, Jock. 44 00:03:46,240 --> 00:03:54,240 I don't think we can have two bugs. We'll have to make do with one. After all, bug costumes cost money. 45 00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:59,240 To spend money on a Squander Bug costume rather defeats the object. 46 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:04,520 Frank's got a Squander Bug costume. I made it for the Scout Show. 47 00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:09,760 I'm not going to wear that. It makes me look a fool. 48 00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:13,920 I saw the show. I thought you looked rather sweet. 49 00:04:18,920 --> 00:04:21,120 Don't make me wear it, Mr Mainwaring, 50 00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:23,800 - please don't make me wear it. - Sort it out amongst yourselves. 51 00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:27,920 - Can we get on, please?! - I quite agree. That's settled. 52 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,960 - Frank Pike will be the Squander Bug. - Oh, no! 53 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:37,960 - Now, the Grand Finale... - My platoon will be doing that. 54 00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:40,800 The Wardens are doing the Finale. 55 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:48,800 - The Finale will be done by the Home Guard and that's that. - Gentlemen, gentlemen...please! 56 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:52,760 I suggest you share the Grand Finale. 57 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:56,760 I second that. I third it! Be quiet! 58 00:04:56,760 --> 00:05:04,240 All those in favour? One...two...three...four...five... six...seven. Against? 59 00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:06,400 Put your hand up, Wilson. 60 00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:11,480 - I can't be bothered. It's a crashing bore. - I'll do it. 61 00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:16,120 He gets too tired for anything this time of night. 62 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:18,320 That's a fact! 63 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:24,480 Seven... So it seems I have the casting vote. 64 00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:30,320 The Grand Finale will be shared by the Wardens and the Home Guard. 65 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:35,640 - And what are the Home Guard doing? - I'm not saying in front of him. 66 00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:41,560 And...your contribution, Mr Hodges? 67 00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:44,800 I'm not saying in front of HIM. 68 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:48,880 Oh, dear. We seem to have reached an impasse. 69 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:54,040 Well, I feel sure that whatever it is...it will be very nice. 70 00:05:57,880 --> 00:06:00,040 I got your estimate this morning, Mr Jackson. 71 00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:02,840 I must say the cost seems pretty high. 72 00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:04,120 What? 73 00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:06,120 But I don't want the legs cut down. 74 00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:10,680 Is Mr Mainwaring buying a table, Uncle Arthur? 75 00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:12,360 It must have 22 legs. 76 00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:17,720 Big table. 77 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:20,640 And the tail must be 12ft-long. 78 00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:23,480 No, it's an aeroplane. 79 00:06:23,480 --> 00:06:28,200 Don't be ridiculous, Frank, just get on with the filing. 80 00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:30,360 No, I'm sorry, I shall just have to cancel it. 81 00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:32,200 Yes, all right, goodbye. 82 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:34,400 I'm going to have to get somebody else to build it. 83 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:37,400 Have you asked Frazer or Jones? 84 00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:41,360 That's not a bad idea. There's room in Frazer's workshop, isn't there? 85 00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:43,720 No, Mr Mainwaring. 86 00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:46,400 Mr Frazer and Mr Jones couldn't make an aeroplane. 87 00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:51,120 Don't you ever make an intelligent remark, Pike? 88 00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:54,880 Haven't you told him, Wilson? 89 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:56,360 No, not yet, no. 90 00:06:56,360 --> 00:07:01,680 I've decided that, as the "Wings For Victory" Parade coincides with St George's Day, 91 00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:09,040 we shall stage a fight between St George and the dragon - representing England and Hitler. 92 00:07:09,040 --> 00:07:12,480 - Can I play St George? - No! 93 00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:16,400 - Have you decided who will play St George? - It's obvious. 94 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:24,320 You? 95 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:28,360 A friend of mine is lending us armour. He wants me to wear it. 96 00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:31,480 Why don't you wear cardboard armour? 97 00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:38,000 A man in my position can't be seen wearing cardboard armour. 98 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:42,600 Real armour might be a bit dangerous. 99 00:07:42,600 --> 00:07:48,680 I don't intend to do anything strenuous. I shall walk the horse round the dragon and shout, 100 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:53,760 "Cry God for Harry, England and St George!" 101 00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:59,920 Then I shall make a symbolic gesture with my sword to the dragon. 102 00:07:59,920 --> 00:08:04,480 - What does the dragon do? - Makes a symbolic gesture back? 103 00:08:13,640 --> 00:08:20,120 - Hurry up, Pike. - I'm not ready. MRS PIKE: He won't be a minute. 104 00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:25,040 - The men are in the dragon, sir. - Well done, Corporal. 105 00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:26,880 Come along, Frank. 106 00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:40,240 - I must say, you made it awfully well, Mavis. - Thank you, Arthur. 107 00:08:40,240 --> 00:08:45,680 The Vicar was right. He does look sweet in it, doesn't he? 108 00:08:45,680 --> 00:08:50,160 He's a dear little Squander Bug. It's too short! 109 00:08:53,040 --> 00:08:54,880 What should he do? 110 00:08:54,880 --> 00:09:02,320 He could say, "Don't be a Squander Bug like me, Save for Victory!" Then he throws the money about. 111 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:05,240 Very good... Try that, Pike. 112 00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:11,760 Don't be a Squander Bug like... 113 00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:21,120 FLAT TONE: Don't be a Squander Bug like me, save for Victory! 114 00:09:21,120 --> 00:09:24,400 - HORN BLARES OUTSIDE - That's no good. - No, sir. He should skip about a bit. 115 00:09:24,400 --> 00:09:29,720 And make gestures with your arms as if you're throwing money. 116 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:39,040 Don't spend money like me... I feel such a FOOL! 117 00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:46,200 - The men are inside the dragon, sir. - Good, good. 118 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:54,200 - Heavens above! What is it? - It's a Squander Bug, of course. 119 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:57,280 He looks like a potato on sticks! 120 00:09:59,160 --> 00:10:04,520 - Have you finished, Mr Mainwaring? - Yes, thank you. - Come along, Frank. 121 00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:08,280 Leave it alone. You'll pull it out of shape! 122 00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:23,360 Hoi! Where are you going? 123 00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:28,600 - You said right wheel. - I said get at the back. 124 00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:32,760 - You get on the front, Jones. - Right, sir. 125 00:10:38,520 --> 00:10:40,720 Stop! Stop! Stop! 126 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:45,480 - What's the matter, sir? - You've got the tail in your mouth. 127 00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:49,240 - Sorry, sir... - That's better. 128 00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:53,720 I'll explain what we're doing. Help me on with the helmet. 129 00:10:57,080 --> 00:11:01,200 - You can't do it with my glasses on. - Oh, right. There you are... 130 00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:06,600 We'll try it like this. That's it. 131 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:13,320 - There we are. - Open the visor. - Right, sir. 132 00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:22,400 - I'm terribly sorry, sir, I'm afraid it's stuck. - It's a wee bit rusted. I'll get some oil. 133 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:31,280 - Open it up! - The dragon ain't half good, isn't it? - Get out of the way, Frank! 134 00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:35,880 - I'm afraid it's rusted up, sir. - I can't hear you. 135 00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:38,880 Look, there's a little door here. 136 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:42,640 Can you HEAR me now, sir? 137 00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:48,880 - You nearly deafened me, Jones. - Can you hear me now? - I can hear, but I can't see. 138 00:11:48,880 --> 00:11:52,560 He can HEAR, but he can't see. 139 00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:57,720 - I'm afraid this is going to be difficult but... - Let me have a go. 140 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:05,920 Oh, yes. Very clever of you. 141 00:12:05,920 --> 00:12:11,440 We'll have you out in a minute. A wee drop here...and here... 142 00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:16,560 Look, there's another door. This helmet's full of them. 143 00:12:16,560 --> 00:12:19,280 - Can you hear me now, sir? - Jones! 144 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:23,280 That's it - got it! How's that, sir? 145 00:12:23,280 --> 00:12:30,240 - You look a little bit red, sir. Are you all right? - Just put my glasses on. - Here we are, sir. 146 00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:33,360 There we are. Lovely... Oh, shut your doors. 147 00:12:33,360 --> 00:12:34,400 - BANG! - Argh! 148 00:12:38,560 --> 00:12:44,960 Stop playing games, boy! Help me on to the horse and we'll rehearse the fight. 149 00:12:44,960 --> 00:12:47,680 I have your sword here, sir. 150 00:12:47,680 --> 00:12:51,400 - Thank you. - Here's your head-bonker. 151 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:55,240 - That looks vicious. - It's only an old tennis ball. 152 00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:58,680 Yeah, wouldn't hurt a fly... 153 00:13:07,760 --> 00:13:12,040 - You STUPID boy! - Sorry. 154 00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:14,720 - Your door as well. - Ah-h! 155 00:13:17,640 --> 00:13:20,520 This is how we stage the fight. Pay attention, men. 156 00:13:22,160 --> 00:13:30,160 I'll walk on to the village green and the dragon will go round me. Understand that, Jones? 157 00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:37,840 - The dragon goes round you. Right. - And then I shall shout, "Cry God for Harry, England and St George!" 158 00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:43,480 At that point the dragon will paw the ground and charge. 159 00:13:43,480 --> 00:13:47,800 - Paw the ground and charge. - Yes. Get into the skin. 160 00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:51,240 - Get into the skin. - Up on the horse. - This side, sir. 161 00:13:51,240 --> 00:13:54,400 - Stand on the box... - Hup! 162 00:13:54,400 --> 00:13:57,640 Hang on... There. 163 00:13:57,640 --> 00:14:01,840 - Hup... - Give me your leg. That's it. - Ah-h-h. 164 00:14:01,840 --> 00:14:05,160 Take your hands off, will you? 165 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:08,160 Hang on a minute... 166 00:14:11,760 --> 00:14:19,480 - Don't you think you ought to be wearing a cardboard helmet? - I'm NOT wearing a cardboard helmet! 167 00:14:19,480 --> 00:14:27,360 - Dragon's ready, sir. - Cry God for Harry, England and St George! 168 00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:29,440 Right, paw the ground. 169 00:14:29,440 --> 00:14:36,600 Hold on! Smoke is supposed to be coming out of the mouth, sir... Jonesy, where's the smoke? 170 00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:42,320 - I can't make it work. - Ach, you stupid old fool. 171 00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:51,600 - That'll frighten the wits out of the crowd, Wilson. - It frightens the wits out of me. 172 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:54,680 It's all ready now, sir. 173 00:14:54,680 --> 00:14:57,200 Cry God for Harry... 174 00:14:57,200 --> 00:15:00,040 England...and St George! 175 00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:03,040 Paw the ground. 176 00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:06,520 COUGHING AND SPLUTTERING 177 00:15:06,520 --> 00:15:10,640 - Where's the smoke? - CHOKING COUGHS 178 00:15:21,080 --> 00:15:25,160 Well, that should do the trick. I only hope it works. 179 00:15:25,160 --> 00:15:31,080 Yon Mainwaring must be mad to wear a real suit of armour. It's sheer vanity. 180 00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:36,320 - Captain Mainwaring, sir. Ready to hoist you. - Right. 181 00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:46,840 - Why have you brought that dog? - The knights always had them, sir. 182 00:15:46,840 --> 00:15:54,120 Why must you give yourself airs all the time? Why can't you behave normally like me? 183 00:15:54,120 --> 00:16:00,360 On Saturday afternoon we shall assemble here and march into the town. 184 00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:07,320 - So we've only got today to sort out any problems that might arise. Pike, get the horse. - Yes, sir. 185 00:16:12,560 --> 00:16:17,520 This is ridiculous, sir. The armour is far too heavy. 186 00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:19,640 Don't be defeatist, Wilson. 187 00:16:19,640 --> 00:16:24,600 If our forebears could wear it... so can I. 188 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,680 - Sponge! - Yes, Mr Jones? 189 00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:32,520 - You haul Captain Mainwaring up. And don't let him dangle. - Right. 190 00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:35,200 Right, heave! 191 00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:46,560 - You've forgotten your helmet. - Right, lower him...lower him. 192 00:16:54,720 --> 00:17:00,320 - You all right, sir? - He can't hear you. I'm going to open the door... 193 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:04,320 - Can you hear me, sir? - Of course I can. Get on with it! 194 00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:08,600 He's in one of his moods. All right. 195 00:17:12,080 --> 00:17:18,080 It would have been better if my sister had knitted him a suit of chain-mail. 196 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:22,480 If anything goes wrong, we'll get him out with a tin-opener! 197 00:17:24,280 --> 00:17:28,600 Walk underneath, Pike. 198 00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:33,560 Lower! 199 00:17:36,880 --> 00:17:43,520 - Why didn't you hold the horse? - You just said to bring him through! 200 00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:46,800 Pull him up! 201 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:07,800 - Hold the horse's head, Frank. - I am holding it. 202 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:22,840 Lift him up! Lift him up! 203 00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:31,720 Lower...lower. 204 00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:37,680 What's that? Come on, gee up. 205 00:18:48,360 --> 00:18:52,840 - Ready, Jones? - All ready, sir. 206 00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:58,240 What a noble figure the Captain makes. Aye, noble...but stupid. 207 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:05,000 Cry God for Harry... England... 208 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:08,240 and St George! 209 00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:17,880 Dragon - 1, St George - 0(!) 210 00:19:19,360 --> 00:19:23,840 I think perhaps Godfrey's sister should knit me a suit of armour. 211 00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:29,360 Atten-tion! 212 00:19:29,360 --> 00:19:32,920 Band and drummers, ready? 213 00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:37,320 By the centre, quick MARCH! 214 00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:38,360 DRUMROLL 215 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,120 THEY PLAY TINNY MARCH 216 00:19:57,680 --> 00:20:02,880 I can't think why you didn't go to the theatrical costumiers like us. 217 00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:07,800 I didn't want to disappoint Godfrey's sister. 218 00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:14,880 Now, the Walmington-On-Sea Ladies' Netball Team present a keep fit display. 219 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:19,600 LIGHT APPLAUSE 220 00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:28,960 GRAMOPHONE RECORD CRACKLES 221 00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:42,320 Ooh, they're very nice, aren't they, Mr Mayor? If you like that sort of thing. 222 00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:52,200 - Will you look at those thighs! - Get away from there, Frazer. 223 00:20:58,120 --> 00:21:03,840 - Mr Mainwaring, I feel a fool. - Do stop grumbling, Pike. 224 00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:08,840 We let you off being a Squander Bug and you're still not satisfied. 225 00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:11,240 I don't like showing my legs! 226 00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:18,440 - It's a pity we have to go on before the Wardens. - Hodges won the toss. 227 00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:22,600 Anyway, after our pageant, anything they do will be an anti-climax. 228 00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:27,600 When I tap you with my sword, you fall over. Is that clear? 229 00:21:29,400 --> 00:21:33,040 I can't wait to see Mainwaring's face. He'll be green with envy! 230 00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:38,880 I think St George and the Dragon is a simply spiffing idea! 231 00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:43,720 Hurry and get changed, Mr Yeatman. 232 00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:49,280 - Uncle Arthur... - Mm? - This makes a lovely pea-shooter... 233 00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:55,880 - OWWWW! - Behave yourself, boy! 234 00:21:57,120 --> 00:22:02,480 I'm going to see if I can get on to the horse in this costume. 235 00:22:04,360 --> 00:22:12,000 - Hold the horse's head, Frazer. - Hey, you'll never get on wearing that. It's too long. 236 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:14,520 Just hold the horse's head. 237 00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:33,160 - It's too long. - Sorry, sir. - What will I do? - Pull your skirt up. 238 00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,520 - It's no good. - Try side-saddle, sir. 239 00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:47,600 Don't be absurd. Whoever heard of St George riding side-saddle? 240 00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:50,960 Ah-h-h... 241 00:22:52,120 --> 00:22:55,480 I think I can make some adjustments, sir. 242 00:22:55,480 --> 00:22:58,440 MUSIC ENDS 243 00:22:59,520 --> 00:23:02,240 WHISTLE BLOWS 244 00:23:02,240 --> 00:23:04,560 APPLAUSE 245 00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:14,000 Thank you and well done, ladies. 246 00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:18,880 Now the next item on the agenda is a display by the Eastgate Morris dancers! 247 00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:23,920 BELLS JINGLING 248 00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:43,560 When you get on the horse, you can drape it around you discreetly. 249 00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:47,240 Well, it will have to do. Thank you very much, Godfrey. 250 00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:52,720 Yon Morris dancers are rotten. Why aren't we Morris dancing? 251 00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:59,160 Too ordinary. They'll never have seen anything like this before. 252 00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:01,280 Ha, that's a fact! 253 00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:06,440 Come on, help me mount. 254 00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:08,720 - Get out of the way, boy. - Sorry. 255 00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:26,120 Wilson, my helmet, please. 256 00:24:26,120 --> 00:24:27,480 Thank you. 257 00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:49,280 BELLS JINGLE Hey! 258 00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:51,120 APPLAUSE 259 00:24:56,600 --> 00:25:03,560 And now the Grand Finale, which is a shared item between the Wardens and the Home Guard. 260 00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:08,160 First, Captain Mainwaring's platoon will perform... 261 00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:11,240 a spectacular medieval extravaganza! 262 00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:14,680 APPLAUSE 263 00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:33,280 TRUMPETER PLAYS FANFARE 264 00:25:38,240 --> 00:25:40,120 TRUMPETER PLAYS FINAL FLOURISH 265 00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:46,640 What's that soppy boy doing? He's dressed like me! 266 00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:48,360 - Maurice! - Yes, Tracy? 267 00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:54,720 Mainwaring's lot are doing St George and the Dragon as well! 268 00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:59,960 I'll kill him! Quick, get out there. And you get in that dragon skin... 269 00:25:59,960 --> 00:26:04,400 Stop handling me. You know I don't like it... Shut up! 270 00:26:08,120 --> 00:26:09,800 APPLAUSE 271 00:26:16,520 --> 00:26:18,600 CROWD CHEER 272 00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:34,080 Well, what a surprise. Captain Mainwaring is going to fight the dragon. 273 00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:36,600 HE PLAYS FANFARE 274 00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:44,960 - What's he up to? - I've no idea. 275 00:26:49,840 --> 00:26:52,400 HORSE WHINNIES 276 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:54,480 LOUD CHEERS 277 00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:06,320 - Get off this field, Hodges! - BOO! 278 00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:07,600 'Ere... 279 00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:13,480 - What's your game?! Clear off! - We'll do nothing of the sort! 280 00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:17,680 - You clear off, you silly fellow! - Look here, Vicar! 281 00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:21,560 - We thought of it first. - Oh, no, you didn't! 282 00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:24,760 Well, don't say you haven't been warned! 283 00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:30,080 Mr Hodges is going to fight the dragon. 284 00:27:36,120 --> 00:27:40,240 No, I tell a lie. The DRAGON is going to fight the dragon. 285 00:27:55,960 --> 00:28:01,280 - Right, Napoleon, you've asked for it! - I'm not afraid of YOU. 286 00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:21,880 Now the two St Georges are fighting each other. This is certainly giving history a new twist. 287 00:28:27,200 --> 00:28:29,080 HORSE WHINNIES 288 00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:42,080 - Do be careful, sir! - It's ever so good! Like that film, Robin Hood. 289 00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:55,320 LOUD CHEER 290 00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:01,880 OOHS AND AAHS FROM CROWD 291 00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:19,000 - We must do something, Frank. - Leave it to me, Uncle Arthur... - Mm? 292 00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:24,560 RATTLE OF PEAS 293 00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:29,960 You flippin' hooligans! 294 00:29:40,280 --> 00:29:41,920 Get OFF! 295 00:29:46,600 --> 00:29:48,280 CROWD CHEERS 296 00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:53,520 Hooray! Hooray! Hooray!