paper was light gold in medieval times
[Music]
oh no tobacco sugar
[Music]
that everything we thought we knew about
the world
might turn out to be completely wrong
[Music]
is over
[Music]
nice very
nice but you look like a new man that's
because i had it cut by a new man
here you are tony
have a drink on me oh cheers bert
yeah next time i have a glass of water
i'll think of you mate
there you have it
that is a nice share of this man
uh you want anything else no
i want a new manual cut
[Laughter]
ravens
give way on let me i'm cold listening
what's the matter a funny thing happened
to me on the way to the shop a funny
thing always happened you on the way to
this shop one time it was mugged the
next time it was two gunmen i mean what
is the matter with you your life is so
full of drama we should make you a damn
you see what you do you bring on the
pins what happened beverly
yesterday i had a deja vu apparently she
was walking past the kid's playground
she saw that empty swing who did y'all
vote
i see the empty playground
the empty swing
swing in
without a child on it
but beverly that happens every day just
after the playground closes no but then
this morning the pain grabbed me
the kind of pain i have when i know
something is a fault this is a foot
watch this
baldies are red they turn violently blue
two things will happen they both involve
you and that is a poem this same p who
is it from
you're not supposed to know that pork
pie why would anybody want to send you
that dess
that sounds like a threat to me let me
see
where it said from um the west end it
could be anybody really out again sure
there might be a clue in this somewhere
baldies are red they i have a feeling
about this
what feeling is that
he's just
a feeling
you see what i mean about you this was
an ordinary day until you came in now
it's turned into a drama
it seems to me this may be the beginning
of the vendetta
this is serious desmond can you think of
anybody who might have a grudge against
you yes
someone about six foot tall wears a suit
and works in a bag
[Music]
[Laughter]
it's always nice to see you
it's the uniform
good morning father what are you doing
here
shouldn't you be at work shouldn't you
listen everybody
ned's got something to tell you all
haven't you nev uh yes
well i don't know how to tell you all
this but as from tomorrow pc neville
james will be no longer i don't know
what you're handing in your uniform yes
i mean you can't do that nev you see
more drama as from tomorrow i will be
detective constable neville jmc id
[Applause]
so make the most of that uniform while
you can
why didn't you tell us she was putting
in for promotion i'll call it
superstition i didn't let anybody know
apart from michael and lee and i didn't
think he'd get it anyway
i mean never detective they must have
been well desperate oh lee do i detect
jealousy
it's just that when he was at school
well he was a bit dopey oh you weren't
too smart yourself well far be it from
me nev but
i believe it when i see it anyway
i'm proud of me old son a mustache i'm
off to pete's dance serving you keep
your eyes peeled
well there is something for our new
detective what's this ah father i almost
forgot this is for you uh what is it
i don't know a chat came up to me
outside the shop and asked me to give it
to you what does person look like look
like he looked like a person what's
going on uh were you with me uh yes did
you see the man what's going on well no
i wasn't paying much attention what is
this world coming to any detective don't
pay attention
i haven't started the job yet
i wouldn't worry too much about it but
but is where water on there somebody
tell me now
something's your practical joke well i'm
not so sure this letter says two things
will happen this could be the second one
well i wouldn't jump to any conclusions
we don't know if the letter and the
parcel are connected oh yeah
well in that case you open it
stop
[Laughter]
there's something strange about this
i sense something
i told you you see more drama oh don't
be stupid it's probably a fuse
there's a bad calm about this barcelo
perhaps she is right
perhaps she isn't this is no joke
i don't believe this a parcel arrives a
daily occurs if one is in business and
you all start running around like
headless chickens look it's probably
hairspray i agree let's open it yes
what is it
it's a money box isn't it
uh no father there's no money in it you
have to put some in
[Music]
[Applause]
strange colors
what a skeleton with an aphra has got to
do with strange powers is beyond here
look i've got to go if anything serious
happens don't hesitate to call me yes
and if you will need anything scream
[Applause]
why did we let beverly talk us into this
we shouldn't be venturing into the
unknown i have a great respect for the
forces of nature
what is sitting around holding hands and
staring at two things on the table have
to do with the forces of nature
i hope you've all been concentrating
[Music]
and have you broken the chain no
have you
how you expect us to concentrate if you
keep nipping after the toilet every
couple of minutes
desmond no one can disobey the forces of
nature cut but cook the meal tonight
concentrate
whoever you are
please speak
by whatever means
[Music]
hello
who is
it don't tell me the spirit couldn't get
the money in
concentrated
[Applause]
[Music]
charlie take the phone off the hook i
want to concentrate my mind it's
concentrated already isn't it it's very
small
look let me try something right
concentrate
no there's no one there
[Laughter]
concentrate
speak
to me you vengeful spirit
so that you may be able to get off your
chest whatever it is about there's one
that is bothering you
is there anybody there
hey what's going on why is this a slime
oh no it's not what it is oh dad and
that's for you mom it's not what it
seems we we we were just having this
game yes we were just having some uh
fun yeah yeah it's fun
i i get it
[Music]
hello
apart
yes
hey export
okay
bye bye bart
that was burt
what did you want uh he didn't see
desmond uh he didn't see anything
in fact it wasn't him
it was nobody oh what's gotta be known
nothing
and that matter of fact i think we've
had enough for this evening good night
no no no beverly i'll see you down
boy if that's what you do for kicks when
you get old i might as well lay down and
die why bother they only try to
resurrect yeah
i told you
[Music]
what's here today
and gone tomorrow
but faster than the sword of zorro
they seek him here
they seek him there
but he also could be anywhere
p
what's here today
and gone tomorrow
my business they're gonna burn down the
shop
calm down father it could mean anything
well in my view it's from someone who
feels he had had a bad haircut yet
what so what we're gonna round up the
whole of pekka men
what we have to try and ascertain is how
this person got into the shop the answer
is
with a key i think there's more to this
than meets the eye call it nonsense but
i still feel that beverly i am trying to
conduct an investigation and i don't
want any interruptions from anyone
whilst i'm trying to do it is that clear
oh we so macho that includes you gloria
sorry nev
well if you think that the suspect
entered the shop with a set of keys
well that would mean that
that one of us is a suspect precisely
hey i like this eh it's like cluedo in
it was it reverend green in a library
with a candlestick this is nothing like
cluedo sit
yeah right now
now we begin our process of deduction
yes my dear watson i think it was
matthew
[Laughter]
how could it be matthew pogba he was
upstairs when it happened ah
well that narrows it down hell sir well
surely tony pogba matthew beverly and i
were predisposed when the incident
occurred
what were you doing yeah we were having
that say ours
don't mock young man how long were you
doing that for oh not long what about
half an hour till gloria and sean walked
in gloria and sean were the last two
people to enter the room upstairs
and they could have come into the living
room from the shop daddy you accusing us
well it would just take a couple of
juvenile delinquent mindsets
including me in that you mean i've seen
you do some really childish things but
i'm not just quiet quiet quiet quiet now
apart from gloria and sean entering the
room
did anyone leave
the room
well
yes
beverly kept on dashing off to the
toilet
she wanted this
beverly
oh my daughter look at me
i can't help it if god what's bush
didn't agree with mr stomach was it
really cut bert's fish that was moving
around in your stomach
or was it the furniture in the
barbershop
are you accusing me
me
you see what you do you make my blood
pressure go up
oh no i'm not the sign this is starting
to play off you see what you do for a
fight
all right
um
so you were all seancing yeah and then
we came down in the shot and bingo there
he was then shirley phoned you and
michael dropped by yeah
yes
why didn't michael drop by
what is this the spanish inquisition
when they say a criminal always likes to
revisit the scene of the crime
the criminal
are you calling me a criminal father get
your facts straight a crime has hardly
been committed here so someone has
walked into the shop and moved around
some furniture oh well it's a little bit
more important than that isn't it
michael
is it it is
playing tricks on your father is quite
important i haven't played any tricks on
you in fact i wish i had pulled this
scam just to see your face ah you wish
you had done it
please guilty what you've got to say to
yourself members of the jury is would
you trust a man that looked like that
yeah but would you trust a woman with a
mouth as big as
thank you sure i rest my case quiet
michael
what i'd like to say to those assembled
here is this
i've been a partner in this business for
nearly two years and as you know profit
has been my main motivation
so bearing that in mind would i
willfully sabotage my own business our
business
no i wouldn't waste the time or the
money on this ridiculous joke
joke it may be
but someone has gained entrance to the
premises without authorization
and that constitutes a crime did i steal
anything no
but they could have done look we're not
getting anywhere
don't worry chill we will
how many people have a set of keys to
the shop well i have a set of course and
so does shirley and shawn and gloria and
michael and
i've recently given a set to tony
hey come on hold on a minute guys when
were you giving a set of keys well about
three weeks ago you seemed only right i
have a set look i do work here you know
my family has had keys for a long long
time and nothing has happened you've
only had a set of keys for three weeks
and there have been three
incidents were you signed desmond i want
the keys back
you don't trust me then no statesman how
could you say that it wasn't difficult
i think you just i don't want you to
think as you introduce the man to me in
the first place
yeah well desmond if you don't trust me
then i don't trust you either so you can
take your keys yeah and your job and
stick it where it hurts
i'd like to return to the two notes
each signed
with a p
a p and a p
p and p what does that mean
the pekka prince that's my name don't
wear it out
what are you doing there lee well the
lights was on so i thought i'd pop in
what are you all doing i bet you with
him lee has been away for the day hasn't
he
very convenient
you know i think he sent the note what
am i supposed to have done no
it couldn't possibly be lee
pep could mean anything
like the pekka pimpanel
they seek him here they seek him there
that's right i've read the book but
[Music]
oh cheers nev you may make a dick after
all
firm neville um what's your thoughts on
the matter i already have a fair idea of
who did it
but i need one final piece of evidence
as we and the cid know
the criminal always makes one last
mistake
and when he does
[Laughter]
i'll have him
[Music]
uh
i suggest we all meet here tomorrow
morning that's it neph me son
[Laughter]
i will catch him won't we
we
well i want to be there too this is a
police matali
desmond
i think you should change the locks
first thing tomorrow morning and in the
meantime just in case our prankster
returns
somebody should sleep in the shop oh yes
and we know who that somebody is going
to be don't we desmond yes
popeye
[Music]
ah
[Music]
uh
[Applause]
[Laughter]
[Music]
so neville are you gonna tell us who you
think did it i can go one better than
that
i know who did it
ever since i started this case
there's been an element that has been
missing
a motive
why would anybody want to play a hoax on
desmond
because of a dodgy haircut
well
he's been doing that for years
so why exact revenge now
no
we have all come to one massive wrong
conclusion
whoever the culprit is
desmond was not his target
well who was
i was you
someone wanted to see me fail on a case
someone who knew about my new job early
enough to set up the prank
someone who resented my promotion
only two people knew about it before the
rest of you
michael
and lee
as i predicted
the perpetrator committed one final act
of bravado
a dead giveaway if i may say so
ladies and gentlemen the culprit is no i
don't know if i could take it
as i was saying
the culprit is
the worst speller
in class 5c
at dawson road secondary
the pekka prince is not inner
scent
[Music]
it's a fair cup you've done really well
nevermind son
please stupid crap what
wait until i get my hands
the freight of our lives and all you was
doing was using us i think never make a
really good detective don't you yeah
right well done
the second time
was colored by the peckham furrow
i think that was a very intelligent scam
cheers matthew hey let me wait to get
the coffins from many we're just wicked
yes man can i borrow your keys please
mine are upstairs
thanks tony
see you monday
there's just one thing everybody now
if lee was down here rearranging the
furniture while we were upstairs holding
our seance
how did you make those phone calls
yeah
what phone calls
i didn't make any phone calls
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
uh