1 00:00:05,226 --> 00:00:06,817 -Got the extradition papers? 2 00:00:06,818 --> 00:00:08,390 -They should all be in order. 3 00:00:08,391 --> 00:00:11,272 -Your bosses must be in a real hurry to get him back to Canada. 4 00:00:11,273 --> 00:00:12,181 What did he do? 5 00:00:12,182 --> 00:00:15,169 -He's wanted for perjury. Apparently he was a key witness in a murder trial 6 00:00:15,170 --> 00:00:17,343 and he changed his testimony on the stand. 7 00:00:17,344 --> 00:00:19,644 It resulted in a mistrial. Is he here? 8 00:00:19,645 --> 00:00:21,543 -Huey and Louie are bringing him over from lockup. 9 00:00:21,544 --> 00:00:23,012 I hear he's quite the character. 10 00:00:23,013 --> 00:00:24,689 He got pulled over for running a red light. 11 00:00:24,690 --> 00:00:27,998 He tried to convince them he was taking a short cut in the Cross-Canada Rally. 12 00:00:27,999 --> 00:00:30,539 If he'd kept his mouth shut, they might never have called INS. 13 00:00:30,540 --> 00:00:32,665 -Elaine, can you find out what the weather's like in Florida? 14 00:00:32,666 --> 00:00:34,157 -Do I look like a travel agent? 15 00:00:34,158 --> 00:00:35,719 -Hey Benny, you ever been to the Sunshine State? 16 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:37,111 -I can't say that I have, Ray. 17 00:00:37,112 --> 00:00:41,533 - Yo! You guys want to move, or you want to find out what fine Italian footwear tastes like? 18 00:00:41,534 --> 00:00:43,489 -Thank you kindly. 19 00:00:43,490 --> 00:00:46,594 -I just hear that it's the rainy season, and I don't want to get all the way down there 20 00:00:46,595 --> 00:00:48,610 and get stuck in some kind of monsoon or something. 21 00:00:48,611 --> 00:00:50,873 -Ray, I thought you'd used up all your vacation time. 22 00:00:50,874 --> 00:00:52,558 -No-no-no, this is not a vacation. 23 00:00:52,559 --> 00:00:54,560 This is a plum just waiting to be picked! 24 00:00:54,561 --> 00:00:59,500 You see, the district sends one detective from each division to go down to Miami 25 00:00:59,501 --> 00:01:03,648 to listen to some lecture on advanced weaponry, and I plan to be said detective. 26 00:01:03,649 --> 00:01:05,174 -So it's assigned on the basis of merit? 27 00:01:05,175 --> 00:01:07,595 -No, it's assigned on the basis of who can suck up to the Lieutenant the most 28 00:01:07,596 --> 00:01:09,259 without making it obvious. 29 00:01:10,568 --> 00:01:12,504 Cappuccino, sir? 30 00:01:13,192 --> 00:01:14,215 -What do you think of this shirt? 31 00:01:14,216 --> 00:01:18,327 -What, that? I think you'll look pretty silly in it sitting behind your desk while I'm in Florida. 32 00:01:18,328 --> 00:01:21,930 -Sorry, pal. This little baby here is my ticket to fun in the sun! 33 00:01:21,931 --> 00:01:24,820 -It's strange you guys mentioned Florida, because my family has a home in the Keys. 34 00:01:24,821 --> 00:01:25,664 So if you want to use it, just let me know. 35 00:01:25,665 --> 00:01:26,662 -Shut up! 36 00:01:26,663 --> 00:01:27,776 What do you got? 37 00:01:27,777 --> 00:01:29,004 -What do you got? 38 00:01:29,005 --> 00:01:30,644 -Orchestra seats to La Bohème. 39 00:01:30,645 --> 00:01:32,619 - Eh, I'll send you a postcard. 40 00:01:32,620 --> 00:01:33,951 -We'll see about that. 41 00:01:34,859 --> 00:01:39,164 -So, you really thought you could get this assignment by sucking up to me, Detective? 42 00:01:39,165 --> 00:01:42,906 -Oh no, sir. A man of your considerable intelligence would see right through that, sir. 43 00:01:42,907 --> 00:01:44,133 -Decaf? 44 00:01:44,134 --> 00:01:45,902 -Uh, no, sir. 45 00:01:45,903 --> 00:01:47,420 -Ah. Thanks anyway. 46 00:01:47,421 --> 00:01:52,168 -No problem, sir. I just happened to be passing the espresso bar on the way to work, sir. 47 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:57,280 -Where can I find an espresso bar in a ten block radius? 48 00:01:57,281 --> 00:01:58,235 -Well, there's a small one-- 49 00:01:58,236 --> 00:01:59,185 -All right, great. Come on. 50 00:01:59,186 --> 00:02:01,437 -You got him real Cuban cigars? No way. 51 00:02:02,945 --> 00:02:04,463 How'd you get your hands on them? 52 00:02:04,464 --> 00:02:11,309 -Let's just say one of the girls in the evidence room thinks I have sensitive eyes. 53 00:02:11,310 --> 00:02:12,562 -Really. 54 00:02:15,579 --> 00:02:17,005 -A moment, sir? 55 00:02:18,712 --> 00:02:20,184 -I bet he's a goner! 56 00:02:22,644 --> 00:02:24,675 -Aw, hey, come on man, he didn't mean it literally. 57 00:02:24,676 --> 00:02:26,018 -What you looking at? 58 00:02:26,019 --> 00:02:27,405 -What's your problem? 59 00:02:28,444 --> 00:02:30,428 -It's just that I had these two tickets to the opera 60 00:02:30,429 --> 00:02:33,252 and I thought I might be out of town tomorrow night. 61 00:02:33,253 --> 00:02:34,668 -That's very generous of you. 62 00:02:34,669 --> 00:02:39,388 -Do you smoke cigars, sir? You're going to think this is a very strange coincidence but uh... 63 00:02:39,389 --> 00:02:41,266 -Cubans, Gardino! 64 00:02:42,775 --> 00:02:45,815 -You boys wouldn't be in any way trying to influence my decision 65 00:02:45,816 --> 00:02:47,650 on which officer makes that Miami-- 66 00:02:47,651 --> 00:02:49,614 -No, sir! -Absolutely not, sir! 67 00:02:49,615 --> 00:02:54,085 -Because uh, I make it a rule to disqualify any officer 68 00:02:54,086 --> 00:02:57,338 who gives me an expensive present of any sort in the last month. 69 00:02:57,339 --> 00:03:01,432 I mean just to avoid any appearances of impropriety. You understand, of course. 70 00:03:01,433 --> 00:03:04,350 -I have reason to suspect that these are uh...domestic, sir. 71 00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:05,286 -Really? 72 00:03:05,287 --> 00:03:09,350 -Yeah, where it says Havana? If you look closely, the ink is smudged. 73 00:03:09,351 --> 00:03:12,595 -Actually the tickets are for the twentieth row, sir. Matinee. 74 00:03:12,596 --> 00:03:15,277 On the other hand, the cigars look real to me. 75 00:03:18,251 --> 00:03:19,899 -Pardon me. Excuse me. Excuse me. 76 00:03:19,900 --> 00:03:21,763 Watch your back, watch your back. 77 00:03:21,764 --> 00:03:24,971 Thank you. Working man, coming through. I got a deadline. 78 00:03:26,742 --> 00:03:28,933 -Detective Huey and Gardino. 79 00:03:28,934 --> 00:03:31,974 Were you escorting a prisoner here for extradition? 80 00:03:31,975 --> 00:03:34,224 -Ah yes sir, he's uh... 81 00:03:34,225 --> 00:03:39,148 I hate to say this, sir, but I believe my partner didn't handcuff him properly. 82 00:03:39,149 --> 00:03:42,131 -Me? It's your cuffs, you ferret-faced little-- 83 00:03:42,132 --> 00:03:44,866 -Hey! Hey! You guys misplace something? 84 00:03:45,710 --> 00:03:48,149 -Detective Vecchio, have you caused a riot yet this morning? 85 00:03:48,150 --> 00:03:49,479 -Not that I'm aware of, sir. 86 00:03:49,480 --> 00:03:51,386 -Good. Gardino, give him your shirt. 87 00:03:52,658 --> 00:03:54,682 -Woooo! I'm going to Miami! 88 00:04:53,945 --> 00:04:56,811 -I have two days to drive down there, one day at the lecture 89 00:04:56,812 --> 00:05:02,109 and two days to drive back. That's five days out of which three I gotta spend on the beach 90 00:05:02,110 --> 00:05:08,244 -Ray, Miami's 1,387 miles from here. That's 26 hours driving time each way. 91 00:05:08,245 --> 00:05:13,471 -Okay, so at a 120 miles an hour that's... 13 hours. I save a day. 92 00:05:13,472 --> 00:05:18,485 -Uh, yes, I need to fly to Detroit today, and I will be transporting a prisoner. 93 00:05:18,486 --> 00:05:20,981 -Fraser, you do not need to tell everybody everything. 94 00:05:20,982 --> 00:05:27,092 -Five days notice. Uh, no, I wasn't aware of that. All right. 95 00:05:27,093 --> 00:05:28,709 Well, thank you very much for your time. 96 00:05:30,698 --> 00:05:34,418 Ray, do you think you can drop us at the train station on your way? 97 00:05:39,435 --> 00:05:43,267 -You know, you are wasting Canadian taxpayers dollars, okay? 98 00:05:43,268 --> 00:05:45,510 Cause you're going to get me there, and they're gonna take one look at me 99 00:05:45,511 --> 00:05:47,811 and they're gonna say, 'You got the wrong guy.' and then they're going to let me go. 100 00:05:47,812 --> 00:05:52,036 -Don't talk to him; he's calculated. Okay, so at 95 miles an hour, how long is that going to take? 101 00:05:52,037 --> 00:05:55,496 -I can't tell you that, Ray. It would recklessly endanger the lives of thousands of motorists. 102 00:05:55,497 --> 00:05:56,766 -Okay, so say 90. 103 00:05:58,722 --> 00:06:01,347 -Good morning. Constable Benton Fraser RCMP. 104 00:06:01,348 --> 00:06:05,250 I called earlier to inquire about transporting a prisoner to Windsor, but your lines were busy. 105 00:06:05,251 --> 00:06:07,313 -You want to transport a prisoner? 106 00:06:07,314 --> 00:06:11,386 -Wanted for train robbery, murder one and escape from maximum security prison. 107 00:06:11,387 --> 00:06:13,229 I'll be no trouble at all. 108 00:06:13,842 --> 00:06:15,908 -Well, I can't very well gag him, Ray. 109 00:06:15,909 --> 00:06:19,809 -Fraser, this man is not your problem. He's an accused felon and a compulsive liar. 110 00:06:19,810 --> 00:06:21,503 -I am an innocent victim of circumstance. 111 00:06:21,504 --> 00:06:22,427 -Shut up! 112 00:06:22,428 --> 00:06:23,818 -Know what your problem is, Fraser? 113 00:06:23,819 --> 00:06:27,083 You can't go around compulsively telling people the truth. They just don't want to hear it. 114 00:06:27,084 --> 00:06:28,828 -Now you see, there I'd have to disagree with you. 115 00:06:28,829 --> 00:06:29,662 -Shut up! 116 00:06:29,663 --> 00:06:31,387 -Hey, Bank of Illinois. 117 00:06:31,388 --> 00:06:33,146 My dad owns that, you know. Well, part owner. 118 00:06:33,147 --> 00:06:35,305 He orchestrated the whole deal, to tell the truth. 119 00:06:35,306 --> 00:06:37,008 I mean, the Rockefellers started it but then he bought it. 120 00:06:37,009 --> 00:06:39,396 But I'm telling you something: that has been one hell of an investment, 121 00:06:39,397 --> 00:06:41,247 cause in the mid-sixties there was a little bit of trouble there. 122 00:06:41,248 --> 00:06:44,179 But I tell you, right now with the EC and everything going on, he's really doing well. 123 00:06:44,180 --> 00:06:45,112 -Shut up! 124 00:06:56,595 --> 00:07:00,267 -Well, I explained the situation to him, and he was extremely helpful. 125 00:07:00,268 --> 00:07:01,847 -Did he rent you a car? 126 00:07:01,848 --> 00:07:03,438 -No, but he doesn't have any. 127 00:07:03,439 --> 00:07:06,462 -What do you mean he doesn't have any? There's gotta be a hundred cars on this lot. 128 00:07:06,463 --> 00:07:08,271 -Unfortunately they're all reserved. 129 00:07:08,272 --> 00:07:11,524 I didn't realize Spiro Agnew's birthday was that widely celebrated. 130 00:07:13,469 --> 00:07:15,157 Also I thought it was in November. 131 00:07:15,158 --> 00:07:16,964 -You know, my mother had an affair with Spiro Agnew, 132 00:07:16,965 --> 00:07:19,854 but it was all hushed up, or course, which is why they wouldn't let me in the Secret Service... 133 00:07:26,731 --> 00:07:30,218 -This is a 1971 mint condition Buick Riviera. 134 00:07:30,219 --> 00:07:31,846 -You know, Ray, you really don't have to do this. 135 00:07:31,847 --> 00:07:33,807 I'm sure I can find someone who will lend me a car. 136 00:07:33,808 --> 00:07:35,312 -How many people have we asked? 137 00:07:35,313 --> 00:07:38,223 -Well, uh, basically everyone I know. 138 00:07:38,224 --> 00:07:42,664 It does seem rather curious that they've all decided to leave town at exactly the same time. 139 00:07:42,665 --> 00:07:45,482 -It uses top octane fuel, 20-weight oil. 140 00:07:45,483 --> 00:07:48,197 -Ray! This is silly. How are you going to get to Florida? 141 00:07:48,198 --> 00:07:51,024 -I'll fly. It'll be worth the six hundred bucks to get rid of you. 142 00:07:51,025 --> 00:07:54,804 -Are you aware that the gas tank in this particular make of car explodes on impact? 143 00:07:54,805 --> 00:07:56,182 -You wanna ride in the trunk? 144 00:07:56,183 --> 00:07:58,636 -Ray, you know, I appreciate this offer, I really do, 145 00:07:58,637 --> 00:08:01,881 but you have some kind of special bond with this vehicle. 146 00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:04,339 I'm not saying I understand it, but I do respect it. 147 00:08:04,340 --> 00:08:05,865 -Shut up before I change my mind. 148 00:08:05,866 --> 00:08:08,746 Now, in the care and operation of this vehicle, there is one thing to remember 149 00:08:08,747 --> 00:08:12,182 and hold above all else. Never--I repeat never--use the lighter. 150 00:08:12,183 --> 00:08:15,376 Of all the original parts in this car, it was the most difficult to replace. 151 00:08:15,377 --> 00:08:20,050 It took me seven years to find that lighter. And since I've owned it? It's never been depressed. 152 00:08:20,051 --> 00:08:21,973 -Then how do you know it works? 153 00:08:21,974 --> 00:08:23,325 -I know in my soul. 154 00:08:23,326 --> 00:08:25,882 Do not adjust the passenger seat, open up the glove box 155 00:08:25,883 --> 00:08:28,724 or use anything other than the preset radio buttons. 156 00:08:28,725 --> 00:08:30,284 -I'll take good care of your car, Ray. 157 00:08:30,285 --> 00:08:31,978 -Don't worry about a thing. Really. 158 00:08:31,979 --> 00:08:35,706 -One final piece of advice. The man sitting across from you is a felon. 159 00:08:35,707 --> 00:08:37,236 -Accused! Accused! 160 00:08:37,237 --> 00:08:41,592 -Do not trust him, do not talk to him, do not listen to him, and most of all, 161 00:08:41,593 --> 00:08:43,504 do not think of him as a human being. 162 00:08:43,505 --> 00:08:48,598 Think of his as a parcel that needs to be delivered, and you will be okay. Do you understand? 163 00:08:48,599 --> 00:08:50,399 -I'll do that, Ray. 164 00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:51,693 -Have a nice trip. 165 00:08:51,694 --> 00:08:52,717 -Thank you, Ray. 166 00:08:52,718 --> 00:08:53,938 -Thanks. Bye-bye. 167 00:08:53,939 --> 00:08:59,744 -Oh, uh, Ray? What's the best way to get to the I-90 from here? 168 00:08:59,745 --> 00:09:01,195 -Oh don't worry, I know. I'll show you. 169 00:09:03,597 --> 00:09:04,418 -Thanks, Ray. 170 00:09:10,633 --> 00:09:12,194 Bye-bye. 171 00:09:48,408 --> 00:09:49,591 -Hi, Ray. 172 00:09:52,774 --> 00:09:54,574 -How far is it from Windsor to Miami? 173 00:09:54,575 --> 00:09:56,138 -Ray, this really isn't necessary. 174 00:09:56,139 --> 00:09:57,123 -Just answer the question. 175 00:09:57,124 --> 00:09:58,823 -1,314 miles. 176 00:09:58,824 --> 00:10:02,339 -Okay, we drop the guy off you take the bus back and I'm only 4 hours behind schedule. 177 00:10:02,340 --> 00:10:07,280 - Well not quite. Four hours and twenty minutes. Still have to pick up Diefenbaker. 178 00:10:21,041 --> 00:10:26,595 -They left Chicago in the cop's car. Green 1971 Buick Riviera. There's the plate number. 179 00:10:32,525 --> 00:10:37,334 -They'll be taking the interstate. We should get to them before they reach Battle Creek. 180 00:10:42,436 --> 00:10:43,924 -Thought I told you to pay him. 181 00:10:45,014 --> 00:10:47,606 -I tried. He wouldn't take Canadian. 182 00:10:57,018 --> 00:10:58,435 -What do we have left in the cooler? 183 00:10:58,436 --> 00:10:59,768 -The sandwiches are for later. 184 00:10:59,769 --> 00:11:01,079 -Well can I have a pop? 185 00:11:05,995 --> 00:11:08,763 -My hands are cuffed behind me and I'm strapped into a seatbelt. 186 00:11:08,764 --> 00:11:10,228 What if we get into an accident? 187 00:11:10,229 --> 00:11:10,875 -Shut up! 188 00:11:10,876 --> 00:11:13,631 -I think we're lost. Are you sure know where we are? 189 00:11:13,632 --> 00:11:16,316 -Yeah, halfway between freedom and incarceration. 190 00:11:16,317 --> 00:11:20,319 You keep your eye on that map. I want a state by state countdown until we get to Winnipeg. 191 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:21,489 -Windsor. 192 00:11:21,490 --> 00:11:22,900 -Yeah like there's a difference. 193 00:11:24,228 --> 00:11:26,365 Damn! I should have brought the snow chains. 194 00:11:26,366 --> 00:11:28,428 Do we really got to cross the border? 195 00:11:28,429 --> 00:11:29,557 -Yes, Ray. 196 00:11:30,851 --> 00:11:34,948 Although you know, I imagine they'll have a dogsled at the bridge, in case we should get stuck. 197 00:11:36,298 --> 00:11:39,650 -See? That's some kind of facetious Canadian humor. 198 00:11:39,651 --> 00:11:44,159 The kind of thing that must really knock 'em dead up around the baithouse in New Foundland. 199 00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:45,881 -Sorry, Ray. 200 00:11:49,576 --> 00:11:54,481 -Would you - back off! Get off me! What is he? Deaf? 201 00:11:54,482 --> 00:11:57,843 -Yes. You know, I think he feels sorry for you. 202 00:11:57,844 --> 00:12:00,352 He senses you're in some kind of trouble, he'd like to help. 203 00:12:00,353 --> 00:12:05,540 You see, wolves have a very difficult time understanding the idea of incarceration. 204 00:12:07,150 --> 00:12:10,014 -Undo my seatbelt. Yeah! 205 00:12:10,015 --> 00:12:13,692 -But they do understand the law, don't they Diefenbaker? 206 00:12:13,693 --> 00:12:18,496 So, Ray, once you drop us off at Windsor, your trip to Miami should be fairly simple. 207 00:12:18,497 --> 00:12:22,075 You take highway 18 west toward Leamington, then catch the ferry-- 208 00:12:22,076 --> 00:12:24,309 -Ferry?! Is Florida on an island? 209 00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:27,145 -No. This is the shortest way across Lake Erie. 210 00:12:27,146 --> 00:12:29,770 You know, you might want to call ahead for the shedule. 211 00:12:29,771 --> 00:12:31,084 -What's a shed-u-wal? 212 00:12:31,085 --> 00:12:32,089 -It's like a schedule. 213 00:12:32,090 --> 00:12:33,428 -It's every hour on the half hour. 214 00:12:33,429 --> 00:12:34,518 -I'll phone. 215 00:12:34,519 --> 00:12:38,870 -And then you get on the 250, travel one hundred and nine kilometers-- 216 00:12:38,871 --> 00:12:42,655 -Kilometers? Look Fraser, when we cross the border you can start talking in Canadian. 217 00:12:42,656 --> 00:12:44,958 Until then, let's stick to English, okay? 218 00:12:44,959 --> 00:12:47,525 -You know, Ray, actually it's quite simple. 219 00:12:47,526 --> 00:12:50,916 Converting kilometers to miles, you simply multiply by five-eighths; 220 00:12:50,917 --> 00:12:54,860 so a hundred and nine kilometers would obviously be sixty-eight and an eighth miles. 221 00:12:54,861 --> 00:12:58,076 Strictly speaking it'd be sixty-seven point sixty-nine miles, 222 00:12:58,077 --> 00:13:01,620 but still, the five-eighths rule is a very handy general guide. 223 00:13:01,621 --> 00:13:03,892 -You know, I know the guy who invented kilometers. 224 00:13:03,893 --> 00:13:09,146 -And then from Milan, which parenthetically most people tend to mispronounce Mi-lan, 225 00:13:09,147 --> 00:13:11,859 you would stay on the 250 through Norwalk-- 226 00:13:11,860 --> 00:13:16,356 -I go south, okay? That's all I need to know. I go south! 227 00:13:16,357 --> 00:13:17,748 -I have to go to the bathroom. 228 00:13:17,749 --> 00:13:18,949 -Well, you can go in Canada. 229 00:13:18,950 --> 00:13:19,386 -Ray! 230 00:13:19,387 --> 00:13:21,472 -Well, I understand. You know, my father use to hate to stop. 231 00:13:21,473 --> 00:13:24,634 I remember once driving through Pruett to a peace conference in Machu Picchu-- 232 00:13:24,635 --> 00:13:26,879 -You know what, McDonald? I don't think you ever had a father. 233 00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:29,344 -Were you driving from Ayacucho or from Cuzco? 234 00:13:29,345 --> 00:13:30,743 -Actually no. From Lima 235 00:13:34,780 --> 00:13:36,244 -How fast are you going, Ray? 236 00:13:36,245 --> 00:13:38,042 -Not fast enough. 237 00:13:46,236 --> 00:13:49,877 -Could we go a little faster? Those kids in that bus were laughing at us. 238 00:13:49,878 --> 00:13:52,015 It's one of those little short buses. 239 00:13:52,016 --> 00:13:57,123 -I think I'm already speeding. These stupid road signs. What's sixty times eight-fifths? 240 00:13:57,124 --> 00:13:58,654 -Ninety-six. 241 00:14:17,534 --> 00:14:20,286 -Ray, I think that was a state trooper traveling in the westbound lane. 242 00:14:20,287 --> 00:14:25,085 -This is the U-S of A, Fraser, cops do not ticket other cops. Now just keep your eye on the map. 243 00:14:28,953 --> 00:14:30,257 -Sign! 244 00:14:31,434 --> 00:14:33,259 -Learn how to drive!! 245 00:14:33,260 --> 00:14:35,164 Some people, huh? 246 00:14:35,165 --> 00:14:38,175 -Well, perhaps they weren't expecting someone to come up behind them 247 00:14:38,176 --> 00:14:40,166 at roughly ninety-three miles an hour, Ray. 248 00:14:40,167 --> 00:14:41,999 -Hey, isn't that what defensive driving is all about? 249 00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:44,156 Assuming the other guy is going to do something stupid? 250 00:14:44,157 --> 00:14:47,353 -Whoo! That did it. My kidneys are gone. We have to find a washroom. 251 00:14:47,354 --> 00:14:50,061 -We don't have washrooms in America. We have restrooms. 252 00:14:50,062 --> 00:14:53,268 The minute I see a sign that says washroom, we'll pull over. 253 00:14:53,269 --> 00:14:54,967 What are you doing? 254 00:14:54,968 --> 00:14:56,559 -Well I-I thought I'd read that. 255 00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:59,081 -That's the original manual! Do not open that! 256 00:14:59,082 --> 00:15:00,217 -You've never read this? 257 00:15:00,218 --> 00:15:01,868 -No, I've never cracked it's spine! 258 00:15:01,869 --> 00:15:02,889 -I cracked my spine once. 259 00:15:02,890 --> 00:15:05,189 -No one's listening to you, and no one cares. 260 00:15:05,190 --> 00:15:07,022 -Punctured my kidney, which is why I-- 261 00:15:07,023 --> 00:15:10,946 -Shut up! Which is why you need to shut up! We'll stop when we need gas. 262 00:15:10,947 --> 00:15:12,344 -Oh we'll stop before that. 263 00:15:12,345 --> 00:15:13,863 -Wanna bet? 264 00:15:19,381 --> 00:15:23,837 -Yeah, well you have a real nice day, too. I'm starting to understand why people hate cops. 265 00:15:23,838 --> 00:15:25,239 -He's just doing his job, Ray. 266 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:27,795 -Is it too much to ask that a person to be allowed to relieve himself? 267 00:15:27,796 --> 00:15:29,891 -Look, you and I both know you're stalling for time. 268 00:15:29,892 --> 00:15:31,970 If you really had to go you could have gone back there. 269 00:15:31,971 --> 00:15:35,144 I've already lost twenty minutes of pool time. We're not stopping! 270 00:15:35,145 --> 00:15:37,248 -Is this the original upholstery? 271 00:15:41,315 --> 00:15:42,546 -It's really quite simple. 272 00:15:42,547 --> 00:15:46,628 To convert from miles to kilometers, you simply multiply by eight-fifths. 273 00:15:46,629 --> 00:15:50,994 So the fifty-five mile an hour limit obviously converts to eighty-eight kilometers per hour. 274 00:15:50,995 --> 00:15:52,915 -I appreciate the warning, officer 275 00:15:52,916 --> 00:15:54,218 -You folks have a nice trip. 276 00:15:54,219 --> 00:15:55,409 -Thank you, officer. 277 00:16:02,144 --> 00:16:04,898 -Nice folks, Canadians. You hear such stories. 278 00:16:16,723 --> 00:16:19,419 -It's not happening. There's too much pressure. 279 00:16:19,420 --> 00:16:22,272 -Ya got ten seconds before I start pumping bullets through this door. 280 00:16:22,273 --> 00:16:26,659 -This really isn't a conducive atmosphere for what I'm trying to accomplish here, okay? 281 00:16:26,660 --> 00:16:28,769 -Perhaps if you tried running the water. 282 00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:30,454 -Do you have helpful hints for everything? 283 00:16:30,455 --> 00:16:33,383 -It's really not my fault. I've got a little bit of a shy bladder-- 284 00:16:48,463 --> 00:16:49,350 -You guys getting hungry? 285 00:16:49,351 --> 00:16:50,154 -Forget it. 286 00:16:50,155 --> 00:16:53,322 -Aw come on, I haven't eaten since the lockup. I know my rights. 287 00:16:53,323 --> 00:16:55,385 You have to feed me every six hours. 288 00:16:55,386 --> 00:16:56,634 -Yeah, well it's only been five. 289 00:16:56,635 --> 00:16:58,078 -Six. We passed a time zone. 290 00:16:58,079 --> 00:17:00,003 -That doesn't count. Fraser you tell him. 291 00:17:00,004 --> 00:17:04,561 -Well, actually Ray, the legal scholars seem to be fairly equally divided on this point. 292 00:17:04,562 --> 00:17:07,070 One argument extended to it's logical conclusion would provide 293 00:17:07,071 --> 00:17:11,566 that if you were traveling west at a rate of speed high enough to cross one time zone every hour, 294 00:17:11,567 --> 00:17:14,501 then you would never actually have to feed a prisoner. 295 00:17:14,502 --> 00:17:17,356 That is, of course, until you cross the International Dateline, 296 00:17:17,357 --> 00:17:21,058 at which point you'd have to force the prisoner to immediately consume four meals. 297 00:17:21,059 --> 00:17:23,292 Now the contrary position... 298 00:17:29,294 --> 00:17:33,054 -All right, you got ten minutes to eat, unless there's a time zone between here and the counter. 299 00:17:33,055 --> 00:17:38,069 -I don't believe this. I've been looking for this place for fifteen years. 300 00:17:38,070 --> 00:17:40,181 My dad and I use to come here all the time. 301 00:17:41,962 --> 00:17:44,554 That's our booth. Right there. That was our booth! 302 00:17:44,555 --> 00:17:47,611 -Yeah, well from now on we'll call this our counter. Grab a stool. 303 00:17:47,612 --> 00:17:49,798 -This is it, officer. Right here. 304 00:17:49,799 --> 00:17:51,864 I don't know how it happened really. 305 00:17:51,865 --> 00:17:55,325 I mean, uh, one second he was just fine; the next thing you know his throat just closed up on him. 306 00:17:55,326 --> 00:17:57,686 I got lucky, cause I just managed to puke it up all over the table. 307 00:17:57,687 --> 00:17:59,826 Look-look-look. Look. There's still pieces on the chair. 308 00:17:59,827 --> 00:18:02,579 Right there. Sir, take off your pants, you're sitting in evidence there. 309 00:18:02,580 --> 00:18:06,769 -Um, he's not telling the truth, no. We-we have no need for your pants. 310 00:18:06,770 --> 00:18:09,207 Perhaps I should follow them. Tell them there's no danger. 311 00:18:09,208 --> 00:18:11,371 -I'll send 'em a postcard. Come on. Let's sit down and eat. 312 00:18:14,859 --> 00:18:17,436 Hello. Yello. Yo, Miss! 313 00:18:17,437 --> 00:18:19,096 -This place hasn't changed a bit. 314 00:18:19,097 --> 00:18:22,566 See, my dad was a sales rep, so three, four times a year we had to go to South Bend. 315 00:18:22,567 --> 00:18:26,469 -Oh miss. Excuse me, miss? Uh, miss? Yo! Yo! 316 00:18:26,470 --> 00:18:29,143 -We'd leave Kitchener at the crack of dawn. 317 00:18:29,144 --> 00:18:31,578 And by the time lunchtime came around, I mean I was starving. 318 00:18:31,579 --> 00:18:33,992 And you know, he'd always want to stop someplace else, 319 00:18:33,993 --> 00:18:37,957 but I'd say no, I wanted to wait 'til we get here, because it's like our place. 320 00:18:37,958 --> 00:18:42,049 - Curious. If you'd taken the interstate I would have thought you'd be here in about five hours. 321 00:18:42,050 --> 00:18:44,332 -Fraser, the man is lying, it's just another story. 322 00:18:44,333 --> 00:18:45,790 You want to do something useful? 323 00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:48,819 Throw a flying tackle into the waitress the next time she passes you. 324 00:18:48,820 --> 00:18:51,177 Hey! Can we order here?! 325 00:18:51,178 --> 00:18:52,912 -They make the best pancakes in the world. 326 00:18:52,913 --> 00:18:56,784 They use to have this turntable right in the middle of the table with six different types of syrup. 327 00:18:56,785 --> 00:19:00,778 Air conditioning blasting, the syrup was always warm. 328 00:19:00,779 --> 00:19:03,435 -Odd. The windows face north. 329 00:19:03,436 --> 00:19:04,955 -You boys ready to order? 330 00:19:04,956 --> 00:19:08,642 -No, let's go straight to the check. What's the fastest thing on the menu? 331 00:19:08,643 --> 00:19:10,050 -I'll have the blueberry pancakes. 332 00:19:10,051 --> 00:19:11,072 -No pancakes. 333 00:19:11,073 --> 00:19:12,699 -Of course you have pancakes. 334 00:19:12,700 --> 00:19:14,564 -You see pancakes on the menu? 335 00:19:14,565 --> 00:19:16,238 -Right. Hamburgers all around. 336 00:19:16,239 --> 00:19:18,591 -Look, do you think you could ask him to make me some pancakes? 337 00:19:18,592 --> 00:19:20,178 I used to come here when I was a kid. 338 00:19:20,179 --> 00:19:23,943 -Then you'll know we've never served pancakes. You want everything on them? 339 00:19:23,944 --> 00:19:24,622 -Yeah. 340 00:19:24,623 --> 00:19:25,523 -I hate pickles. 341 00:19:25,524 --> 00:19:26,348 -Pick 'em off. 342 00:19:32,153 --> 00:19:33,322 -I'm telling you, it was Alaska. 343 00:19:33,323 --> 00:19:36,059 -It wasn't Alaska, it was Nebraska. 344 00:19:36,060 --> 00:19:40,207 -It was Alaska. It was yellow and shaped like a polar bear and said 'Alaska.' 345 00:19:40,208 --> 00:19:44,667 -Alaska is gold and blue. The Northwest Territories is shaped like a polar bear. 346 00:19:44,668 --> 00:19:48,249 -If you two don't shut up, I'm pulling the car over right now and I'll shoot you both. 347 00:19:56,355 --> 00:19:57,188 -I got 'em. 348 00:19:57,189 --> 00:20:00,181 -This better be Illinois plates on a Buick Riviera. 349 00:20:00,182 --> 00:20:02,477 -Yeah. At the restaurant. 350 00:20:02,478 --> 00:20:05,029 -That's good, Norman. Nice work. 351 00:20:05,450 --> 00:20:07,643 -You better eat that burger, cause we're not stopping again. 352 00:20:07,644 --> 00:20:12,470 -I had a hiding space down here. I used to flip out the baseboard and leave stuff there. 353 00:20:12,471 --> 00:20:14,199 You know, toy solders and marbles. 354 00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:17,728 -Are you telling that story for my benefit? Because A, I don't believe it, and B, I don't care. 355 00:20:17,729 --> 00:20:19,481 -They must have fixed it. 356 00:20:19,482 --> 00:20:22,332 -I don't think this is the place you're looking for Ian. 357 00:20:22,333 --> 00:20:26,077 -Yeah. Who cares, you know? 358 00:20:26,078 --> 00:20:29,579 -You remember when you said the syrup was always warm in the afternoon? 359 00:20:29,580 --> 00:20:31,759 That would indicate westerly facing windows 360 00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:33,588 which means the highway had to run north and south. 361 00:20:33,589 --> 00:20:37,050 The most direct route to South Bend would have been highway 12, a slower road, 362 00:20:37,051 --> 00:20:41,024 which would have put you past Hillsdale by approximately one o'clock. 363 00:20:41,025 --> 00:20:43,163 Now if I recall from the map correctly, 364 00:20:43,164 --> 00:20:46,760 that highway dips south about 16 miles west of that community. 365 00:20:46,761 --> 00:20:51,830 So actually Ian, I think you're off by about 45 miles. 366 00:20:51,831 --> 00:20:55,430 -Do you believe everything that people tell you? Huh? How do you get through a day?! 367 00:20:57,710 --> 00:20:59,318 -Did I tell you he was yanking your chain? 368 00:21:06,168 --> 00:21:07,409 -My mistake. 369 00:21:13,635 --> 00:21:14,715 -You look after the car. 370 00:21:41,138 --> 00:21:41,962 -Are you allright? 371 00:21:41,963 --> 00:21:42,968 -Yeah. 372 00:21:42,969 --> 00:21:44,787 -Go get the car, Ray. 373 00:22:37,314 --> 00:22:38,257 -Are they coming? 374 00:22:38,258 --> 00:22:39,304 -I don't see them. 375 00:22:39,305 --> 00:22:41,877 -Did you see that? They tried to kill me! 376 00:22:41,878 --> 00:22:43,555 -Yeah, the bullets tipped me off. 377 00:22:46,686 --> 00:22:47,518 -You got 'em? 378 00:22:47,519 --> 00:22:49,251 -Just a second. 379 00:22:54,157 --> 00:22:54,957 -'Kay, I got 'em. 380 00:23:11,155 --> 00:23:13,251 -There should be a state police post in Battle Creek. 381 00:23:13,252 --> 00:23:14,069 -Forget it! 382 00:23:14,070 --> 00:23:15,270 -Ray, we have to report this. 383 00:23:15,271 --> 00:23:17,677 -Look, Fraser, there must have been a dozen people back at that roadhouse. 384 00:23:17,678 --> 00:23:19,287 I guarantee that somebody called it in. 385 00:23:19,288 --> 00:23:23,088 If we go in there, they're going to keep us there for hours making out reports. 386 00:23:23,089 --> 00:23:25,188 -Ray, they opened fire inside a restaurant. 387 00:23:25,189 --> 00:23:27,588 We can't weigh that against a couple hours driving time. 388 00:23:27,589 --> 00:23:29,560 -Okay, here's what happens. We go in there, they call Welsh. 389 00:23:29,561 --> 00:23:32,308 I don't get to go to Florida and you don't get your prisoner to Canada. 390 00:23:32,309 --> 00:23:32,857 -Still I-- 391 00:23:32,858 --> 00:23:33,866 -I think I see them! 392 00:23:33,867 --> 00:23:37,451 -Look we can't just pull off and start driving around in circles and looking for help. 393 00:23:37,452 --> 00:23:39,571 I mean, how long do you think it'll take 'em to catch up to us? 394 00:23:39,572 --> 00:23:42,653 -Well, if we keep going in a straight line, we're not exactly going to be difficult to find. 395 00:23:42,654 --> 00:23:43,969 -Oh, they're behind that truck! 396 00:23:59,633 --> 00:24:00,506 -I think they turned right. 397 00:24:00,507 --> 00:24:01,249 -Where? 398 00:24:01,250 --> 00:24:02,493 -Back there. 399 00:24:16,702 --> 00:24:18,638 -All right, McDonald, you want to tell us who wants you dead, 400 00:24:18,639 --> 00:24:20,803 excluding the immediate occupants of this car? 401 00:24:20,804 --> 00:24:21,644 -You wouldn't believe me. 402 00:24:21,645 --> 00:24:22,404 -That I believe. 403 00:24:22,405 --> 00:24:25,787 -They're rogue Mounties. The RCMP does not want me to testify. 404 00:24:25,788 --> 00:24:27,575 -I don't think they could be Mounties, Ian. 405 00:24:27,576 --> 00:24:29,663 The man in the hat appears to be in his mid fifties, 406 00:24:29,664 --> 00:24:33,031 so he would have had to join up when the height requirements were still in place, 407 00:24:33,032 --> 00:24:34,762 and would have narrowly missed qualifying. 408 00:24:34,763 --> 00:24:38,464 -His nickname is Stumps. He chased a guy through a lumber mill and lost 3 inches off his legs. 409 00:24:38,465 --> 00:24:40,474 -Here. Don't slap him, shoot him. 410 00:24:40,475 --> 00:24:45,175 -All right, fine. You want the truth? You heard about the Basque separatist movement? 411 00:24:45,176 --> 00:24:46,019 -Next! 412 00:24:46,020 --> 00:24:51,368 -All right fine, you want the real truth? Here it is. Those guys are part of the Canadian mob. 413 00:24:51,369 --> 00:24:53,122 -There's no such thing! 414 00:24:53,123 --> 00:24:56,760 -On the contrary, Ray, organized crime is a growing problem in Canada. 415 00:24:56,761 --> 00:25:01,550 -Oh yeah, what are we talking about here? Conspiracy to commit jaywalking? Organized littering? 416 00:25:01,551 --> 00:25:03,433 -The guy in the hat? Danny 'The Bull' Brock. 417 00:25:03,434 --> 00:25:07,167 One of his guys sticked him on account, so he took him into an alley and shot him eight times. 418 00:25:07,168 --> 00:25:09,861 -So is that one time with eight bullets or eight separate times? 419 00:25:09,862 --> 00:25:14,221 Because in America, after the third trip down the same alley, we'd start to get a little suspicious. 420 00:25:14,222 --> 00:25:16,021 -I happened to be looking out my window into the alley. 421 00:25:16,022 --> 00:25:17,469 -Yeah, what? All eight times? 422 00:25:17,470 --> 00:25:21,921 -Hey, I saw him do it. So the cops found out and they made me testify. 423 00:25:21,922 --> 00:25:25,756 -Oh, and on the stand you-you-- wait, don't tell me-- you lied? 424 00:25:25,757 --> 00:25:28,420 -Look, these guys can get you anywhere, okay? 425 00:25:28,421 --> 00:25:31,520 I was protected around the clock and I still managed to find a note under my pillow. 426 00:25:31,521 --> 00:25:36,783 So, I fingered somebody else...except that he happened to be in jail at the time of the murder. 427 00:25:36,784 --> 00:25:38,084 -Yeah, and that was very entertaining. 428 00:25:38,085 --> 00:25:42,410 So what's your next story? We're being pursued by plain-clothed toreadors? 429 00:25:51,027 --> 00:25:52,548 -Ray, this road isn't on the map. 430 00:25:52,549 --> 00:25:55,002 -It's going East. That's all I need to know. 431 00:25:56,555 --> 00:25:58,732 All right, here's a little trick they don't teach you in drivers ed. 432 00:26:01,410 --> 00:26:03,442 -Where are they? Where are they? 433 00:26:03,443 --> 00:26:04,290 -I don't know. 434 00:26:04,291 --> 00:26:05,945 -What do you mean you don't know? 435 00:26:15,504 --> 00:26:16,785 -I was a driving instructor once. 436 00:26:16,786 --> 00:26:20,336 -Shut up! All right, now you two rock back and forth when I gun the engine. 437 00:26:23,341 --> 00:26:25,582 -No, no, no, you're just digging yourself in deeper. 438 00:26:25,583 --> 00:26:26,851 -I'm afraid he's right, Ray. 439 00:26:31,778 --> 00:26:36,658 -Yahhhhh...Well, it looks worse than it really is. 440 00:26:38,720 --> 00:26:41,063 My shoe! Mother Nature just ate my shoe! 441 00:26:41,064 --> 00:26:42,691 -You want me to get it for you, Ray? 442 00:26:42,692 --> 00:26:45,192 -No. What I want is for us to get out of this ditch, 443 00:26:45,193 --> 00:26:49,605 drop this psychopath off and drown my sorrows in coconut milk!! 444 00:26:49,606 --> 00:26:52,508 This is what I want, okay? This is what I really want. 445 00:26:55,377 --> 00:26:56,984 And a flip-flop. 446 00:26:56,985 --> 00:27:01,285 Okay, you two push it out and I'll rock us out of here. 447 00:27:01,286 --> 00:27:04,462 -You're taking me to jail and you expect me to help you out? I don't think so. 448 00:27:04,463 --> 00:27:05,856 -Just get back there and push. 449 00:27:05,857 --> 00:27:10,736 -Well, we can't actually make him do that Ray. Forced labor is against the Geneva Convention. 450 00:27:10,737 --> 00:27:13,870 -Yeah well, somebody's got to push it, somebody's got to drive, and I've only got one shoe. 451 00:27:13,871 --> 00:27:14,760 -I'll drive. 452 00:27:14,761 --> 00:27:15,896 -The hell you will! 453 00:27:15,897 --> 00:27:17,145 -All right, suit yourself. 454 00:27:17,146 --> 00:27:18,228 -Ray. 455 00:27:20,058 --> 00:27:22,610 -All right, all right, we'll push it out. 456 00:27:27,931 --> 00:27:29,043 -You expect me to drive like that? 457 00:27:29,044 --> 00:27:32,711 -Yeah, but not too far. All right. On three! 458 00:27:35,078 --> 00:27:36,126 -Gimme that. 459 00:27:38,614 --> 00:27:39,566 You broke it. 460 00:27:39,567 --> 00:27:42,106 -Probably double-backed. Son of a... 461 00:27:47,939 --> 00:27:49,172 -I said three! 462 00:27:49,173 --> 00:27:50,640 -My foot cramped. 463 00:27:50,641 --> 00:27:51,635 -All right. 464 00:27:52,348 --> 00:27:54,795 Oh! Ray, look! Look I think I found... 465 00:28:02,596 --> 00:28:06,165 -All right, I think we should have enough traction here. 466 00:28:06,166 --> 00:28:11,055 -Okay, let's try it again on one. ONE! 467 00:28:19,127 --> 00:28:21,352 Okay, stop the car, smart guy! Stop the car! 468 00:28:21,353 --> 00:28:23,355 -I can't! I can't! My legs cramped up! 469 00:28:23,356 --> 00:28:26,528 -Stop the car, you slime-sucking toad! 470 00:28:26,529 --> 00:28:27,762 -You better undo these things. 471 00:28:27,763 --> 00:28:29,085 -You can go to hell! 472 00:28:32,607 --> 00:28:33,862 Fraser! 473 00:28:36,082 --> 00:28:37,946 -Ow-ow-ow! My leg, ow! 474 00:28:52,813 --> 00:28:53,670 -Damn! 475 00:28:55,257 --> 00:28:56,417 -They know where we are. 476 00:28:56,418 --> 00:28:57,227 -What? 477 00:28:57,228 --> 00:29:01,846 -There's a tracking device on the car. If we don't get to him fast, they'll find him, they'll kill him. 478 00:29:01,847 --> 00:29:04,293 -It's not going to happen, Fraser, cause I've got first dibs. 479 00:29:11,389 --> 00:29:12,485 -I'm going to find my shoe. 480 00:29:15,287 --> 00:29:16,685 -Um. About your shoe... 481 00:29:23,872 --> 00:29:25,928 -I got 'em. They're heading north. 482 00:29:39,090 --> 00:29:43,443 -Do you know how many mint condition '71 Buick Rivieras are left on the road? 483 00:29:43,444 --> 00:29:47,131 Almost none. This man stole something from me that is almost irreplaceable. 484 00:29:47,132 --> 00:29:50,548 -And easily identifiable. Which means he can't use the freeways. 485 00:29:50,549 --> 00:29:54,851 He knows Brock is after him. He has to assume we'll have put out an APB. 486 00:29:54,852 --> 00:29:58,678 So his only option is to find someplace to hide until dusk, and then travel at night. 487 00:29:58,679 --> 00:30:00,299 -Oh that narrows down the search to every barn, 488 00:30:00,300 --> 00:30:02,629 garage or haystack in the greater Michigan area. 489 00:30:02,630 --> 00:30:05,188 -Every barn has a farmer, Ray, and every garage has an owner. 490 00:30:05,189 --> 00:30:08,192 Without time and friends, it's not that easy to find someplace to hide. 491 00:30:08,193 --> 00:30:12,454 He's wanted on both sides of the border by both sides of the law. He's got nowhere to run. 492 00:30:12,455 --> 00:30:13,965 -He dents it, I'll kill him. 493 00:30:13,966 --> 00:30:16,562 -My father said something that's always stuck with me, Ray. 494 00:30:16,563 --> 00:30:18,452 -You father never shut up, did he? 495 00:30:18,453 --> 00:30:21,372 -He said 'A man with no future will always run to his past.' 496 00:30:21,373 --> 00:30:22,576 -And when did this come up, Fraser? 497 00:30:22,577 --> 00:30:24,986 Were you sitting around at breakfast when he came up with these things? 498 00:30:24,987 --> 00:30:27,310 Or did he come running into your room and just blurt 'em out? 499 00:30:27,311 --> 00:30:29,935 -Ray. There's no need to be sarcastic. 500 00:30:29,936 --> 00:30:33,066 -No, I'm just curious. How did he work these things into everyday conversation? 501 00:30:33,067 --> 00:30:35,630 Did he say, 'Son, did you see the size of that moose? 502 00:30:35,631 --> 00:30:38,929 And by the way, a man with no future will always run to his past?' 503 00:30:38,930 --> 00:30:39,525 -Ray. 504 00:30:41,522 --> 00:30:44,442 I'm sorry about your shoe. I thought you didn't want it anymore. 505 00:30:44,443 --> 00:30:45,921 -You know what my father used to say? 506 00:30:45,922 --> 00:30:47,238 'A man without a car is nothing.' 507 00:30:47,239 --> 00:30:50,770 And I don't want to be nothing anymore, Fraser - it's hard on my socks! 508 00:30:56,955 --> 00:30:58,100 -He went that way. 509 00:30:58,101 --> 00:31:01,672 -Why? Does a man with no future always turn left? 510 00:31:01,673 --> 00:31:03,824 -No, he's gone to find the pancake house. 511 00:31:03,825 --> 00:31:07,800 -There is no pancake house. It's a lie, just like everything else that's come out of his mouth. 512 00:31:07,801 --> 00:31:11,708 -I don't think so, Ray. People tell lies for a number of different reasons. 513 00:31:11,709 --> 00:31:15,430 Because they are ashamed, because they are insecure, sometimes because they are in trouble. 514 00:31:15,431 --> 00:31:17,509 But they always hope to gain something from their lie. 515 00:31:17,510 --> 00:31:20,217 Money, prestige, pity, sometimes even freedom. 516 00:31:20,218 --> 00:31:23,750 His story about the pancake house, he stood nothing to gain by it. 517 00:31:23,751 --> 00:31:25,721 He told it because it's true. 518 00:31:25,722 --> 00:31:30,024 He let us see a little glimpse of who he really is, then he got angry because we saw that. 519 00:31:30,025 --> 00:31:34,339 That pancake house exists. It's maybe the only place around here where he feels safe. 520 00:31:34,340 --> 00:31:36,028 I think he's gone to find it. 521 00:31:36,029 --> 00:31:38,398 -I bet he used my lighter. 522 00:31:45,451 --> 00:31:46,595 -All right. Here we go. 523 00:31:49,386 --> 00:31:50,490 -Need a lift? 524 00:31:50,491 --> 00:31:51,970 -Oh yes, thank you! 525 00:31:51,971 --> 00:31:52,731 -Not you. 526 00:31:52,732 --> 00:31:54,327 Which way you going? 527 00:31:54,328 --> 00:31:56,085 -Oh well, we're traveling together, ma'am. 528 00:31:56,086 --> 00:31:56,792 -Ditch him. 529 00:31:56,793 --> 00:31:57,787 -I'll go without him. 530 00:31:57,788 --> 00:32:00,509 -Not likely. Too bad. 531 00:32:02,623 --> 00:32:05,503 If you ever get to Miami, just ask for Rhonda. 532 00:32:09,467 --> 00:32:12,266 -See that? Women always judge you by your shoes. 533 00:32:12,267 --> 00:32:14,276 -Well, I don't think she was sincere in her invitation, Ray, 534 00:32:14,277 --> 00:32:18,698 I mean, how could a young woman possible be known by her first name in such a large city? 535 00:32:18,699 --> 00:32:21,041 -Fraser, your father taught you nothing, you know that? 536 00:32:21,042 --> 00:32:24,517 Okay. Enough is enough. I'm the law and I need a lift. 537 00:32:27,982 --> 00:32:32,903 -Uh, Ray, I don't think he can possibly read your badge from this distance. 538 00:32:35,123 --> 00:32:36,259 -But I could be wrong. 539 00:32:41,876 --> 00:32:43,236 -Well, they can read this! 540 00:32:43,237 --> 00:32:47,808 -Ray, brandishing a weapon is not going to encourage motorists to come to our aid. 541 00:32:47,809 --> 00:32:50,970 -Fraser, look at me: I have one shoe, I am covered in mud 542 00:32:50,971 --> 00:32:53,688 and I'm standing with a wolf and a guy dressed like who knows what? 543 00:32:53,689 --> 00:32:58,363 No one in their right mind is going to stop and give us a lift without the threat of deadly force! 544 00:33:00,702 --> 00:33:02,256 -You folks stranded, eh? 545 00:33:02,257 --> 00:33:03,251 -Canadian? 546 00:33:03,252 --> 00:33:04,872 -Go on, eh? How'd you know? 547 00:33:07,204 --> 00:33:10,909 -Now, we're officers of the law, sir, and we're pursuing an escaped perjurer. 548 00:33:10,910 --> 00:33:12,238 We'd very much appreciate a lift. 549 00:33:12,239 --> 00:33:13,500 -Well, hop on in. 550 00:33:13,501 --> 00:33:14,753 -Thank you kindly. 551 00:33:17,419 --> 00:33:19,427 -It's a sick country you have, Fraser. 552 00:33:30,707 --> 00:33:32,899 -Damn Americans! They never signal! 553 00:33:35,822 --> 00:33:37,221 -They turned. -Which way? 554 00:33:37,222 --> 00:33:37,860 -That way. 555 00:33:37,861 --> 00:33:39,712 -I can't see when you point in the back seat. 556 00:33:39,713 --> 00:33:40,387 -Left. 557 00:33:40,388 --> 00:33:41,951 -Here? -Yes, here. 558 00:33:50,665 --> 00:33:53,376 -It would be a pancake house off Highway 12 near Hillsdale. 559 00:33:53,377 --> 00:33:55,225 -Well, we're headed for a mall right near there. 560 00:33:55,226 --> 00:33:57,352 -You have such wonderful malls in the States. 561 00:33:57,353 --> 00:34:02,927 -We mapped out the whole route on our home computer, eh? Three states, six malls, one day! 562 00:34:02,928 --> 00:34:07,923 -Oh goodness would you look at that. More stranded motorists with guns. 563 00:34:07,924 --> 00:34:09,362 -Floor it, buddy, floor it! 564 00:34:15,617 --> 00:34:18,313 -America's just getting more violent all the time. 565 00:34:18,314 --> 00:34:23,087 -It's television, eh? That's why I like our fine Canadian programming. 566 00:34:34,910 --> 00:34:35,917 -Jeez! 567 00:34:44,114 --> 00:34:45,027 -You guys need some help? 568 00:35:19,062 --> 00:35:22,047 -You guys need a ride, we're coming right past here on the way back. 569 00:35:22,048 --> 00:35:23,523 -Oh thanks, we'll be fine. 570 00:35:23,524 --> 00:35:25,746 -If you're ever in Sarnia, drop by. 571 00:35:25,747 --> 00:35:26,209 -Thank you kindly. 572 00:35:26,210 --> 00:35:27,709 -Thanks. 573 00:35:31,596 --> 00:35:34,813 -Fraser, If I'm ever in Sarnia, shoot me with a big gun. 574 00:35:34,814 --> 00:35:42,456 There she is! Oh baby. Oh baby. Oh baby, did he hurt you? Did he hurt you? 575 00:36:00,937 --> 00:36:02,200 -I didn't even see anything. 576 00:36:02,201 --> 00:36:04,211 -I'm sorry? 577 00:36:04,212 --> 00:36:10,590 -In the alley. I was in my apartment. I just didn't look out my window. 578 00:36:15,099 --> 00:36:17,317 I didn't see anything. Didn't hear anything. 579 00:36:18,659 --> 00:36:20,252 -But you told the police you did. 580 00:36:20,253 --> 00:36:21,253 -They came looking for witnesses. 581 00:36:21,254 --> 00:36:27,017 I was there when it happened so they said I must have seen something. 582 00:36:28,299 --> 00:36:29,467 I couldn't help myself. 583 00:36:33,295 --> 00:36:38,431 Look at this. I thought I'd stashed something valuable here. You know some money, some jewelry.. 584 00:36:38,432 --> 00:36:40,843 Look at this junk. 585 00:36:43,359 --> 00:36:45,473 You know we would travel for hours to get here. 586 00:36:45,474 --> 00:36:47,338 He'd say maybe two words to me. 587 00:36:47,339 --> 00:36:50,675 Then we'd get here and he'd give me some money and tell me he'd be back. 588 00:36:52,714 --> 00:36:54,970 He left me here for hours. Sometimes overnight. 589 00:36:54,971 --> 00:36:58,179 You know, the only reason that he took me was 590 00:36:58,180 --> 00:37:01,019 so that my mother wouldn't know he was cheating on her! 591 00:37:01,020 --> 00:37:06,693 And she would always ask me what we did and where we went, and he would tell me what to say. 592 00:37:08,615 --> 00:37:12,878 Now she had to be the most gullible person in the world. 593 00:37:12,879 --> 00:37:19,071 I mean, I could have told her that we went to the moon, and she would have believed me. 594 00:37:19,072 --> 00:37:21,500 Not too bright. 595 00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:28,905 She thought I was going to be somebody. 596 00:37:33,015 --> 00:37:36,014 I think she would be proud. What do you think? 597 00:37:38,078 --> 00:37:42,575 -Is that why you said you'd seen the murder? To be somebody? 598 00:37:44,029 --> 00:37:47,379 -Look. I am just telling you an amusing anecdote. 599 00:37:47,380 --> 00:37:49,666 This is a very very sad story, my friend. 600 00:37:52,137 --> 00:37:54,945 Hoping maybe you would feel sorry for me and let me go. 601 00:37:59,191 --> 00:38:01,520 You do have to appreciate the irony of the situation. 602 00:38:01,521 --> 00:38:07,799 I mean, I tell a lie and say I saw Danny the Bull do it, and I go free. 603 00:38:07,800 --> 00:38:16,233 I tell the truth - that I saw absolutely nothing - and they're never going to believe me. 604 00:38:16,234 --> 00:38:20,062 I'll go to jail for perjury. That's the story of my life. 605 00:38:25,975 --> 00:38:27,838 -Everybody down-down-down! 606 00:38:34,779 --> 00:38:36,299 -Get up-get up-get up! 607 00:38:44,991 --> 00:38:49,544 -Hey, Ian, come out here, we want to talk to you! 608 00:38:58,087 --> 00:38:58,719 -I think I got the windshield. 609 00:38:58,720 --> 00:39:00,315 -Every little bit helps, Ray. 610 00:39:00,316 --> 00:39:02,707 -Oh, great. We'll be dead, but they'll have really poor visibility. 611 00:39:02,708 --> 00:39:06,715 -Okay. I'll cover, you go out the back door and circle around. 612 00:39:06,716 --> 00:39:07,727 -There is no back door. 613 00:39:07,728 --> 00:39:09,032 -Yeah, like I'm suppose to believe that? 614 00:39:09,033 --> 00:39:10,475 -You're right. I'm on their side! 615 00:39:13,223 --> 00:39:14,064 -Any ideas? 616 00:39:14,065 --> 00:39:18,143 -The only access is to the side and front windows, and they have those covered. 617 00:39:21,876 --> 00:39:25,028 You know, Ray, if you could lay down enough withering fire, I think I can make it to the car. 618 00:39:25,029 --> 00:39:26,117 -I only got one bullet left. 619 00:39:28,647 --> 00:39:29,718 -That's all we're gonna need. 620 00:39:29,719 --> 00:39:31,569 -Yeah, if we can get 'em to line up straight. 621 00:39:31,570 --> 00:39:33,995 -No-no. When I was flipping through the service manual of your car, 622 00:39:33,996 --> 00:39:37,228 I discovered that your gas tank is only eleven inches from your rear fender. 623 00:39:37,229 --> 00:39:38,572 -You opened my manual? 624 00:39:38,573 --> 00:39:43,284 -Only for three seconds. Now one bullet surely can penetrate the tank and spark an explosion. 625 00:39:43,285 --> 00:39:44,608 -I was right? 626 00:39:44,609 --> 00:39:47,228 -Yeah, and luckily you'll both be taking that information to the grave. 627 00:39:48,537 --> 00:39:52,034 -What we need to do is get the other two close enough to be hit by the explosion. 628 00:39:52,035 --> 00:39:54,479 -But there's two guys behind their car. Why can't I just shoot it? 629 00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:56,809 -Well I didn't read their manual, Ray. 630 00:39:58,380 --> 00:39:59,460 -I can get them to the car. 631 00:39:59,461 --> 00:40:01,281 -Oh yeah, like we can trust you. 632 00:40:01,282 --> 00:40:03,493 -Look I was just offering to help. If you don't want me to, fine! 633 00:40:03,494 --> 00:40:05,764 -Oh, feeling a little remorse are we? 634 00:40:05,765 --> 00:40:09,756 A little guilt for leaving us stranded out in the middle of nowhere to freeze to death? 635 00:40:09,757 --> 00:40:11,106 Well, it's too late, pal. 636 00:40:11,107 --> 00:40:15,535 God could see right through your feeble attempts at redemption when you think that the end is near. 637 00:40:15,536 --> 00:40:17,069 Trust me, it wouldn't do you any good. 638 00:40:17,070 --> 00:40:18,632 -You speaking from personal experience? 639 00:40:21,884 --> 00:40:25,988 Look, I haven't done a whole hell of a lot in my life that benefited anybody but myself, and for once, 640 00:40:25,989 --> 00:40:29,231 I was going to do something for somebody else! Forget I mentioned it! 641 00:40:29,232 --> 00:40:31,961 -Oh very poignant. I got tears in my eyes. 642 00:40:31,962 --> 00:40:35,043 The only problem is we both know if we let you out, 643 00:40:35,044 --> 00:40:37,693 you cut a deal with them to let you go, you get us killed. 644 00:40:37,694 --> 00:40:40,487 -I don't think so, Ray. I think we can trust him. 645 00:40:40,488 --> 00:40:41,435 -No, you can't. 646 00:40:41,436 --> 00:40:43,078 -Yes, we can. 647 00:40:44,462 --> 00:40:45,431 -No other way? 648 00:40:45,432 --> 00:40:49,639 -No. Although, you know, maybe it would be easier if I shot your car. 649 00:40:49,640 --> 00:40:51,640 -No-no-no. I can do it. 650 00:40:54,531 --> 00:40:58,468 No funny business or I miss the car and aim straight for you. Capisce? 651 00:41:01,950 --> 00:41:06,183 -Mr. Brock! It's Ian. How you doing? 652 00:41:09,175 --> 00:41:15,200 Okay, here's the deal. I come out with the car keys and you let me disappear. 653 00:41:15,201 --> 00:41:21,951 I just go, I don't testify, they tell their bosses I escaped and everybody goes away happy. 654 00:41:21,952 --> 00:41:24,187 You think you can live with that? 655 00:41:24,907 --> 00:41:26,659 -Let me think about it! 656 00:41:28,054 --> 00:41:29,526 Dump him in the trunk. 657 00:41:30,769 --> 00:41:32,209 Okay, Ian! 658 00:41:34,021 --> 00:41:37,390 -As soon as you get close enough, dive for cover. He'll shoot. 659 00:41:40,990 --> 00:41:43,045 -Of course, you know, if you'd rather I shot the car-- 660 00:41:43,046 --> 00:41:44,509 -Just get out the door! 661 00:42:05,703 --> 00:42:06,999 -He's getting closer. 662 00:42:17,489 --> 00:42:19,040 He's almost there. 663 00:42:20,367 --> 00:42:21,607 -My hand is shaking. 664 00:42:27,622 --> 00:42:28,552 -Uh, Ray. 665 00:42:37,336 --> 00:42:39,304 -Right now would be quite a good time. 666 00:42:57,113 --> 00:42:58,041 -You all right? 667 00:42:58,042 --> 00:43:00,580 -Yeah, yeah, I used to be a stuntman for awhile. 668 00:43:30,024 --> 00:43:32,927 -Just stop at customs, I'll explain the situation. 669 00:43:32,928 --> 00:43:35,818 -Ya, we do this all the time. Just let me do the talking. 670 00:43:35,819 --> 00:43:38,329 Nothing to declare. 671 00:43:38,330 --> 00:43:41,991 -Well we... well as a matter of fact-- 672 00:43:50,213 --> 00:43:51,781 -Get out of the car, please. 673 00:43:59,343 --> 00:44:01,686 -Well, they think there was a short in the electrical system... 674 00:44:03,247 --> 00:44:04,982 Uh, no, I'm fine, sir... 675 00:44:07,165 --> 00:44:10,638 Well, it may take some time to find some of the parts, sir. 676 00:44:12,934 --> 00:44:14,061 Yeah. Thank you. 677 00:44:19,304 --> 00:44:20,952 He's sending Elaine to Miami. 678 00:44:20,953 --> 00:44:22,989 -I'm so sorry, Ray. 679 00:44:26,678 --> 00:44:28,861 -Would it be against the law to get us a cruller? 680 00:44:31,061 --> 00:44:32,780 -Trying to decide what you're going to do? 681 00:44:34,895 --> 00:44:39,991 -Between lying and going to jail? That's a tough one. 682 00:44:39,992 --> 00:44:45,324 -It is, actually. You can keep deceiving people so they think you are somebody, 683 00:44:45,325 --> 00:44:47,903 or you can be somebody. 684 00:44:49,113 --> 00:44:52,193 -Everybody needs to be somebody sometime. 685 00:44:55,358 --> 00:44:58,981 -There was a person your mother thought you could be. What do you think he'd do? 686 00:45:07,364 --> 00:45:08,626 -You have any trouble with him? 687 00:45:11,170 --> 00:45:12,346 -No. 688 00:45:12,347 --> 00:45:13,818 -Okay, let's get on the road then. 689 00:45:24,381 --> 00:45:25,876 -See you in a few years. 690 00:45:46,464 --> 00:45:48,016 -What's the quickest way to get back on the highway? 691 00:45:48,017 --> 00:45:50,794 -Oh, don't worry, I'll show you. Make a left. 692 00:46:01,738 --> 00:46:04,588 -Ray, I think we should have turned him over to the Canadian authorities. 693 00:46:04,589 --> 00:46:07,374 -Hey, if they want him they can dig him out of an American jail. 694 00:46:08,997 --> 00:46:10,781 Come on, stick out your thumbs! 695 00:46:13,111 --> 00:46:14,798 -You're certain all the rental cars were taken? 696 00:46:14,799 --> 00:46:18,086 -Hey don't blame me, I never heard of your damn Maple Syrup Day. 697 00:46:22,421 --> 00:46:24,093 -I'm sure it's this way. Make a left. 698 00:46:37,018 --> 00:46:38,858 Now I got it. Straight ahead, straight ahead.