1 00:00:11,814 --> 00:00:13,013 What are you guys staring at? 2 00:00:13,048 --> 00:00:15,215 That dick whistle Andrew Lesley. 3 00:00:15,217 --> 00:00:17,217 Andrew Lesley's here? 4 00:00:17,219 --> 00:00:19,937 I didn't get a chance to tell you I loved your script. 5 00:00:19,972 --> 00:00:21,355 You did not. 6 00:00:21,390 --> 00:00:23,190 - What an asshole. - Which one? 7 00:00:23,225 --> 00:00:24,691 Take your pick. 8 00:00:24,727 --> 00:00:27,978 This network has never had a woman in that job. 9 00:00:28,030 --> 00:00:31,532 - Don't you think it would-- - What about Helen Basch? 10 00:00:31,567 --> 00:00:32,900 Uh, wow. 11 00:00:32,902 --> 00:00:36,069 She acts like nothing happened, but come on. 12 00:00:36,071 --> 00:00:37,654 I broke up her marriage. 13 00:00:37,706 --> 00:00:40,874 You think she's gonna want me as her number two? 14 00:00:40,910 --> 00:00:42,042 Call your agent. 15 00:00:42,077 --> 00:00:45,078 Sell your show. Make the money. 16 00:00:45,131 --> 00:00:47,164 I'm sorry. 17 00:00:47,216 --> 00:00:49,416 The FBI's been investigating him for stealing money 18 00:00:49,418 --> 00:00:51,718 from his clients. 19 00:00:51,754 --> 00:00:53,470 - Larry? - How much do you have with him? 20 00:00:53,506 --> 00:00:56,089 What do you mean how much? All of it. 21 00:00:56,091 --> 00:00:59,176 - Oh, shit. - Motherfucking son of a bitch. 22 00:00:59,228 --> 00:01:02,679 - May he rest in peace. - Whose side are you on? 23 00:01:21,250 --> 00:01:32,015 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 24 00:02:12,801 --> 00:02:14,084 Mm? 25 00:02:14,136 --> 00:02:16,086 Hi, honey, it's Beth. Did I wake you? 26 00:02:16,138 --> 00:02:17,971 - Mm. - Okay, listen. 27 00:02:18,007 --> 00:02:22,309 I've been getting tons of calls for a comment. 28 00:02:22,344 --> 00:02:23,310 About what? 29 00:02:23,345 --> 00:02:24,478 The money thing. 30 00:02:24,513 --> 00:02:25,512 The what? 31 00:02:25,514 --> 00:02:26,730 The money thing. 32 00:02:26,765 --> 00:02:30,851 Larry Penzel? Stealing your money? 33 00:02:30,853 --> 00:02:33,987 Oh, Jesus, right. 34 00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:35,822 Oh, fuck me. 35 00:02:35,858 --> 00:02:38,825 Okay, so I've written a short statement for you. 36 00:02:38,861 --> 00:02:41,194 I just want to make sure you're comfortable with it. 37 00:02:41,196 --> 00:02:44,164 "For 17 years, Larry Penzel was my business manager 38 00:02:44,199 --> 00:02:45,165 and personal friend." 39 00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:47,784 Evil sack of shit. 40 00:02:47,836 --> 00:02:49,920 "I can confirm that he misappropriated 41 00:02:49,955 --> 00:02:51,672 a substantial amount of money from me." 42 00:02:51,707 --> 00:02:54,207 Hope they're raping him in hell. 43 00:02:54,260 --> 00:02:56,510 "However, there are other victims of his fraud 44 00:02:56,545 --> 00:02:57,961 who lost much more than I did." 45 00:02:58,013 --> 00:03:00,347 - Is that true? - I don't know. 46 00:03:00,382 --> 00:03:03,884 "My sympathies go out to Mr. Penzel's widow and children." 47 00:03:03,886 --> 00:03:05,269 No, they don't. 48 00:03:05,304 --> 00:03:07,354 "Their loss is much greater than mine." 49 00:03:07,389 --> 00:03:09,723 - Bullshit. - Any other thoughts? 50 00:03:09,775 --> 00:03:15,479 I hope he comes back to life, gets ass cancer, and dies again. 51 00:03:15,531 --> 00:03:18,565 All right, let me give it another pass. 52 00:03:30,212 --> 00:03:32,913 - Oh, no. - What? 53 00:03:32,915 --> 00:03:35,465 - "What?" - They're not the same. 54 00:03:35,501 --> 00:03:37,250 Another checked shirt couldn't tell them apart. 55 00:03:39,505 --> 00:03:41,805 Eileen. Hello? 56 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:44,224 Hi, guys, are you two together? 57 00:03:44,259 --> 00:03:46,893 You have no idea. 58 00:03:46,929 --> 00:03:48,812 So, lots to report. 59 00:03:48,847 --> 00:03:51,598 I set up all our network meetings for Friday. 60 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,934 I figure we'll do them in a row, bang, bang, bang, 61 00:03:53,986 --> 00:03:56,269 and then go for lunch and see where we are. 62 00:03:56,271 --> 00:03:57,270 Sounds like a plan. 63 00:03:57,323 --> 00:03:59,523 Okay, see you Friday! 64 00:03:59,575 --> 00:04:03,944 Everybody wants you. This is gonna be so fun! 65 00:04:03,946 --> 00:04:05,912 - Bye. - Thank you. 66 00:04:05,948 --> 00:04:07,331 What? 67 00:04:07,366 --> 00:04:10,200 You really want to go through this again? 68 00:04:10,252 --> 00:04:12,953 Financially I think we'd be foolish not to. 69 00:04:12,955 --> 00:04:15,422 It might be different this time. You don't know. 70 00:04:15,457 --> 00:04:19,009 Darling, why on earth would it be different? 71 00:04:19,044 --> 00:04:20,627 Let's at least hear what they have to say. 72 00:04:20,629 --> 00:04:21,962 It doesn't matter what they say. 73 00:04:22,014 --> 00:04:23,630 They'll say whatever we want to hear. 74 00:04:23,682 --> 00:04:26,133 Look, they can't all be devious fuckwits. 75 00:04:26,185 --> 00:04:27,968 Yes, they can! 76 00:04:27,970 --> 00:04:31,054 Okay, how about this? We take the meetings. 77 00:04:31,106 --> 00:04:32,356 And shove them? 78 00:04:32,391 --> 00:04:33,974 If we can find one that we both agree 79 00:04:34,026 --> 00:04:36,059 won't crush our souls, 80 00:04:36,111 --> 00:04:37,611 then we'll consider doing the show. 81 00:04:37,646 --> 00:04:39,863 Otherwise, back in the drawer it goes. 82 00:04:39,898 --> 00:04:43,734 - I'll take those odds. - Thank you. 83 00:04:43,786 --> 00:04:46,820 - I liked the other shirt better. - I know. 84 00:04:46,872 --> 00:04:49,156 You're wearing it. 85 00:04:52,127 --> 00:04:53,660 How bad is it? 86 00:04:53,712 --> 00:04:57,247 Well, on one hand, even with the embezzlement, 87 00:04:57,299 --> 00:04:58,749 you're still a wealthy man. 88 00:04:58,801 --> 00:05:01,168 - And the other hand? - Take a look at this. 89 00:05:01,220 --> 00:05:03,587 If you maintain your current rate of spending, 90 00:05:03,639 --> 00:05:06,890 you'll run out of money by the time you get here. 91 00:05:06,925 --> 00:05:09,760 2019? 92 00:05:09,812 --> 00:05:11,178 Fucking other hand. 93 00:05:11,230 --> 00:05:14,231 The problem is you have virtually no cash. 94 00:05:14,266 --> 00:05:16,983 Everything's tied up in non-liquid assets: 95 00:05:17,019 --> 00:05:20,821 Real estate, automobiles, a dinosaur egg? 96 00:05:20,856 --> 00:05:22,355 Yeah, it's pretty awesome. 97 00:05:22,357 --> 00:05:24,441 It's, like, this big with spots on it and-- 98 00:05:24,493 --> 00:05:26,026 What we need to do 99 00:05:26,028 --> 00:05:29,863 is convert some of that to income-generating capital. 100 00:05:29,865 --> 00:05:31,281 Meaning what, sell shit? 101 00:05:31,333 --> 00:05:32,416 Right. 102 00:05:32,451 --> 00:05:34,000 What we also need to do 103 00:05:34,036 --> 00:05:36,870 is look at reducing your expenses. 104 00:05:36,872 --> 00:05:40,290 Obviously there are fixed costs that are unavoidable. 105 00:05:40,342 --> 00:05:42,542 Insurance, medical, 106 00:05:42,544 --> 00:05:44,928 the mortgage on your father's condo. 107 00:05:44,963 --> 00:05:48,298 Um, that one's not in stone. 108 00:05:48,350 --> 00:05:50,467 You're prepared to evict your father? 109 00:05:50,519 --> 00:05:54,771 I'm just saying let's keep it in our back pocket. 110 00:05:54,807 --> 00:05:58,975 All right. Uh, child support, alimony-- 111 00:05:59,027 --> 00:06:00,267 Actually, that one's going away. 112 00:06:00,279 --> 00:06:02,028 My ex-wife's getting remarried. 113 00:06:02,064 --> 00:06:05,065 Well, that's a sizable savings. 114 00:06:05,117 --> 00:06:06,900 Congratulations. 115 00:06:06,902 --> 00:06:08,401 Do we know when that's happening? 116 00:06:08,454 --> 00:06:10,120 No, but I can find out. 117 00:06:10,155 --> 00:06:12,656 Taking that off the books will be a big help, big. 118 00:06:12,708 --> 00:06:14,958 See? It's not all the other hand. 119 00:06:14,993 --> 00:06:16,993 It's a start. 120 00:06:17,045 --> 00:06:20,464 We also need to talk about some of your more, uh, 121 00:06:20,499 --> 00:06:23,333 discretionary expenses. 122 00:06:23,385 --> 00:06:26,169 Who is Jose Padilla? 123 00:06:26,221 --> 00:06:28,839 He's the guy who sweeps my beach. 124 00:06:28,891 --> 00:06:30,924 And if he didn't? 125 00:06:30,926 --> 00:06:32,676 Who's gonna do it? 126 00:06:32,728 --> 00:06:37,230 See, that's the kind of thing we may need to eliminate. 127 00:06:37,266 --> 00:06:39,432 Wow, that seems pretty drastic. 128 00:06:39,434 --> 00:06:42,569 Well, let's think about it. 129 00:06:42,604 --> 00:06:45,522 All right, um, there's the vineyard. 130 00:06:45,574 --> 00:06:48,608 No, no. No, that's income-producing. 131 00:06:48,660 --> 00:06:50,110 I make money on the wine. 132 00:06:50,112 --> 00:06:52,863 Actually, Aaron ran the numbers. 133 00:06:52,915 --> 00:06:55,332 For what you're spending to operate the vineyard-- 134 00:06:55,367 --> 00:06:57,834 new equipment, insurance, salaries-- 135 00:06:57,870 --> 00:07:02,172 it's actually costing you about $1,100 a bottle. 136 00:07:04,259 --> 00:07:05,876 I-I can't sell the vineyard. 137 00:07:05,928 --> 00:07:08,762 First of all, my name is on the label. 138 00:07:08,797 --> 00:07:13,633 Plus I got, like, $15,000 worth of sweatshirts and T-shirts 139 00:07:13,685 --> 00:07:15,802 and hats with my logo on it. 140 00:07:15,804 --> 00:07:17,053 No, not selling it. 141 00:07:17,105 --> 00:07:18,138 It's off the table. 142 00:07:18,190 --> 00:07:20,941 All right, there's the plane. 143 00:07:20,976 --> 00:07:22,475 - No. - It's a huge-- 144 00:07:22,477 --> 00:07:23,810 No, the plane is off the table. 145 00:07:23,812 --> 00:07:27,647 - But-- - Move on. 146 00:07:27,649 --> 00:07:31,484 I think we should discuss the possibility 147 00:07:31,486 --> 00:07:33,486 of liquidating the car collection. 148 00:07:33,539 --> 00:07:35,288 Fuck you. 149 00:07:35,324 --> 00:07:36,323 Okay. 150 00:07:36,375 --> 00:07:37,991 So that's not on the table? 151 00:07:37,993 --> 00:07:39,876 Not even near the table. 152 00:07:39,912 --> 00:07:41,328 But you're prepared to evict your father? 153 00:07:41,330 --> 00:07:44,497 Not one of those cars is an asshole. 154 00:07:44,550 --> 00:07:46,716 Let's keep going. 155 00:07:46,752 --> 00:07:50,837 We're showing you spent $126,000 156 00:07:50,889 --> 00:07:54,591 on a single bottle of Brandy once owned by Al Capone? 157 00:07:54,643 --> 00:07:55,892 A little piece of history. 158 00:07:55,928 --> 00:07:58,812 Can you see yourself parting with it? 159 00:07:58,847 --> 00:08:00,313 I drank it. 160 00:08:00,349 --> 00:08:02,566 - Ah. - I was drunk. It was there. 161 00:08:02,601 --> 00:08:06,019 As a business decision, it's hard to defend. 162 00:08:12,578 --> 00:08:14,327 I don't know. 163 00:08:14,363 --> 00:08:15,946 This did nothing for me. 164 00:08:15,998 --> 00:08:18,448 I agree. It just doesn't feel like us. 165 00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:20,500 - I liked it. - Really? 166 00:08:20,535 --> 00:08:22,953 I like the relationships between the characters. 167 00:08:23,005 --> 00:08:25,622 I like the physical comedy. It feels fresh. 168 00:08:25,674 --> 00:08:30,126 But do we really want to do a show with puppets? 169 00:08:30,178 --> 00:08:34,631 Puppets? 170 00:08:34,683 --> 00:08:37,517 Oh. 171 00:08:37,552 --> 00:08:40,854 Uh, Helen Basch is here to see you? 172 00:08:40,889 --> 00:08:45,358 Helen's here? Oh, my God, send her in. 173 00:08:45,394 --> 00:08:47,060 "Am I interrupting?" said the woman 174 00:08:47,112 --> 00:08:48,478 who's clearly interrupting. 175 00:08:49,564 --> 00:08:51,314 Please, interrupt away. 176 00:08:54,369 --> 00:08:55,735 So, introductions. 177 00:08:55,737 --> 00:08:58,405 Obviously, Helen Basch. Andy Button. 178 00:08:58,457 --> 00:09:01,408 Hi, can I have a raise? Too soon? 179 00:09:03,412 --> 00:09:04,411 And Myra Licht. 180 00:09:04,413 --> 00:09:05,795 Actually, Myra and I 181 00:09:05,831 --> 00:09:07,747 met last year at the Aspen Comedy Festival. 182 00:09:07,799 --> 00:09:08,965 Okay. 183 00:09:09,001 --> 00:09:10,967 And now look at you. You're-- 184 00:09:11,003 --> 00:09:12,419 What? 185 00:09:12,421 --> 00:09:14,671 Going to be working together. 186 00:09:14,723 --> 00:09:17,757 Yes, can't wait. So excited. 187 00:09:17,809 --> 00:09:20,393 Mm. 188 00:09:20,429 --> 00:09:21,344 You got quite the crew here. 189 00:09:22,981 --> 00:09:26,599 All righty, how about you guys give us a few minutes? 190 00:09:26,601 --> 00:09:29,352 So nice meeting you. Totally kidding about the raise. 191 00:09:29,404 --> 00:09:30,854 Sort of. 192 00:09:30,906 --> 00:09:32,272 I'll see you both soon. 193 00:09:32,274 --> 00:09:34,407 Bye-bye. 194 00:09:37,245 --> 00:09:38,578 Oh. 195 00:09:38,613 --> 00:09:40,747 Oh, my God. I totally thought she was-- 196 00:09:40,782 --> 00:09:43,917 She's never said, and we're all afraid to ask. 197 00:09:43,952 --> 00:09:45,785 Well, something's going on in there. 198 00:09:45,787 --> 00:09:48,455 If she's not having one, she definitely ate one. 199 00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:54,260 So, sit, sit, sit. 200 00:09:54,296 --> 00:09:57,430 We are all so thrilled you are here. 201 00:09:57,466 --> 00:09:59,966 Aw, thank you. 202 00:09:59,968 --> 00:10:03,219 All right, look, I need to get this out of the way. 203 00:10:03,271 --> 00:10:05,889 Can we talk about the elephant in the room? 204 00:10:05,941 --> 00:10:08,108 Oh, sure. 205 00:10:08,143 --> 00:10:09,726 I wish I'd brought peanuts. 206 00:10:11,313 --> 00:10:16,066 Okay, before you say anything, I am so sorry. 207 00:10:16,118 --> 00:10:19,452 If I could go back in time and undo it, I would. 208 00:10:19,488 --> 00:10:21,154 There is no excuse. 209 00:10:21,206 --> 00:10:23,790 I was young. I was naive. 210 00:10:23,825 --> 00:10:26,826 Okay, those are both excuses. 211 00:10:26,828 --> 00:10:29,829 But it was my first real job. 212 00:10:29,881 --> 00:10:33,416 He was powerful and exciting, 213 00:10:33,468 --> 00:10:36,886 and you have no idea what I'm talking about. 214 00:10:36,922 --> 00:10:39,305 Nope. 215 00:10:39,341 --> 00:10:41,591 How many elephants are in here? 216 00:10:47,315 --> 00:10:48,348 - Morning. - Morning. 217 00:10:48,400 --> 00:10:51,151 One sec. 218 00:10:56,441 --> 00:10:57,941 - Hey. - What are you doing here? 219 00:10:57,993 --> 00:11:00,193 Matt LeBlanc is here to see you. 220 00:11:00,245 --> 00:11:02,028 Thanks for the heads up. 221 00:11:02,030 --> 00:11:03,913 The what? 222 00:11:03,949 --> 00:11:06,449 So, to what do we owe the pleasure 223 00:11:06,501 --> 00:11:08,284 or whatever it is we're about to experience? 224 00:11:08,336 --> 00:11:10,253 We'd offer you a seat, but, um-- 225 00:11:10,288 --> 00:11:12,338 Yeah, what happened to your shitty couch? 226 00:11:12,374 --> 00:11:14,374 We know when we came back from London, it was gone, 227 00:11:14,426 --> 00:11:17,177 so, uh, pull up a box. 228 00:11:19,681 --> 00:11:20,630 What's up? 229 00:11:20,682 --> 00:11:21,798 I kind of need a favor. 230 00:11:21,850 --> 00:11:24,434 - No. - Maybe let him ask first? 231 00:11:24,469 --> 00:11:26,553 - Thank you. - Fine. 232 00:11:26,555 --> 00:11:27,854 What? 233 00:11:27,889 --> 00:11:29,389 I need you to talk to Andrew Lesley. 234 00:11:29,441 --> 00:11:30,857 - Fuck off. - No way. 235 00:11:30,892 --> 00:11:32,692 Look, he won't let me do his pilot 236 00:11:32,727 --> 00:11:34,727 'cause he thinks I'm still doing our piece of crap. 237 00:11:34,729 --> 00:11:36,029 Oh, thank you. 238 00:11:36,064 --> 00:11:37,781 You got to convince him ours is dead. 239 00:11:37,816 --> 00:11:40,200 He'll listen to you guys. You got the history. 240 00:11:40,235 --> 00:11:41,234 No, forget it. 241 00:11:41,286 --> 00:11:42,652 There is no way we are speaking 242 00:11:42,704 --> 00:11:45,538 to that smug, duplicitous, talking scarf. 243 00:11:45,574 --> 00:11:47,707 I was about to say "When pigs fly out of your ass," 244 00:11:47,742 --> 00:11:50,293 but I've seen what you eat, so it's not an impossibility. 245 00:11:50,328 --> 00:11:51,744 Come on! I'm desperate here. 246 00:11:51,797 --> 00:11:53,880 They want me to sell my vineyard! 247 00:11:53,915 --> 00:11:55,165 You have a vineyard? 248 00:11:55,217 --> 00:11:57,467 - I never gave you a bottle? - No. 249 00:11:57,502 --> 00:11:59,669 Well, you are definitely getting a bottle 250 00:11:59,721 --> 00:12:02,138 and a sweatshirt and a hat. 251 00:12:02,174 --> 00:12:03,173 I'm excited. 252 00:12:03,225 --> 00:12:04,507 If you need money so badly, 253 00:12:04,559 --> 00:12:05,592 why don't you just sell your plane? 254 00:12:05,594 --> 00:12:08,094 The plane is off the table! 255 00:12:08,096 --> 00:12:12,065 What I need is work. 256 00:12:12,100 --> 00:12:13,766 Look, I realize what I'm asking, 257 00:12:13,768 --> 00:12:15,819 but it's a few minutes of your time, 258 00:12:15,854 --> 00:12:19,939 and it would mean everything to me, come on. 259 00:12:19,941 --> 00:12:22,158 - Fine, we'll call him. - You got to do it in person. 260 00:12:22,194 --> 00:12:23,776 - Fuck off. - In person? No fucking way. 261 00:12:23,829 --> 00:12:26,112 My agent called him. My manager called him. 262 00:12:26,114 --> 00:12:27,614 It's not gonna work over the phone. 263 00:12:27,616 --> 00:12:28,748 It's got to be face-to-face. 264 00:12:28,783 --> 00:12:33,703 - No. - Fuck off. 265 00:12:33,755 --> 00:12:35,538 If you do this for me, 266 00:12:35,590 --> 00:12:37,957 I will take you to a Golden Globes gifting suite. 267 00:12:37,959 --> 00:12:40,093 Say more. 268 00:12:41,346 --> 00:12:42,629 Wait, wait. 269 00:12:42,631 --> 00:12:45,598 So you didn't make him break up with me? 270 00:12:45,634 --> 00:12:47,433 I didn't even know there was a you. 271 00:12:47,469 --> 00:12:50,687 And you didn't make him fire me? 272 00:12:50,722 --> 00:12:52,772 I probably would have if I'd known. 273 00:12:52,807 --> 00:12:54,107 Does that help? 274 00:12:54,142 --> 00:13:00,313 So he did all that just to stop seeing me? 275 00:13:00,365 --> 00:13:01,814 Oh, my God! 276 00:13:01,816 --> 00:13:04,567 Look, I get that you loved him, 277 00:13:04,619 --> 00:13:07,487 and I know this is hard to hear, 278 00:13:07,539 --> 00:13:12,659 but ed was an emotionally stunted, compulsively lying, 279 00:13:12,661 --> 00:13:15,328 evil sack of shit. 280 00:13:15,380 --> 00:13:17,297 He seemed so nice. 281 00:13:17,332 --> 00:13:20,500 Hey, at least you got out. I'm still paying him alimony. 282 00:13:22,554 --> 00:13:24,137 Can I ask you something? 283 00:13:24,172 --> 00:13:27,257 Uh, what was your elephant? 284 00:13:27,309 --> 00:13:31,010 Oh, I heard you were looking for another job, 285 00:13:31,062 --> 00:13:34,514 and I was gonna convince you to stay. 286 00:13:34,516 --> 00:13:35,682 Ah. 287 00:13:38,436 --> 00:13:40,687 Good afternoon, Andrew Lesley's office. 288 00:13:40,739 --> 00:13:42,822 Please hold. 289 00:13:42,857 --> 00:13:44,857 - Hello, we're-- - Sean and Beverly Lincoln. 290 00:13:44,859 --> 00:13:46,359 We've been expecting you. 291 00:13:46,411 --> 00:13:49,362 Andrew, they're here. 292 00:13:49,364 --> 00:13:52,498 Oh, my God. 293 00:13:52,534 --> 00:13:55,952 Look at you! In my office! 294 00:13:56,004 --> 00:13:57,287 My mentors! 295 00:13:57,339 --> 00:13:59,622 Yenz, how much do I talk about these two? 296 00:13:59,674 --> 00:14:01,591 - All the time. - All the time. 297 00:14:01,626 --> 00:14:04,844 Well, we talk about you a fair bit too. 298 00:14:04,879 --> 00:14:06,596 Oh. 299 00:14:06,631 --> 00:14:07,931 Come in, come in, come in, come in, 300 00:14:07,966 --> 00:14:09,098 come in, come in, come in, come in. 301 00:14:09,134 --> 00:14:11,851 Sit, sit, sit. 302 00:14:11,886 --> 00:14:14,304 I apologize for the sofa. It's temporary. 303 00:14:14,356 --> 00:14:16,973 The one I ordered is taking forever. 304 00:14:18,226 --> 00:14:19,809 Heads will roll. 305 00:14:19,861 --> 00:14:21,144 Oh, look out for the heads. 306 00:14:22,564 --> 00:14:23,563 All right. 307 00:14:23,565 --> 00:14:25,148 Here we go. 308 00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:27,734 - Oh, my God. - You didn't have to-- 309 00:14:27,736 --> 00:14:29,902 Please, we do it every day. 310 00:14:29,904 --> 00:14:32,205 - Are these yours? - Don't be mad. 311 00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:33,990 You can just buy them. 312 00:14:34,042 --> 00:14:35,541 I know, but you like them. 313 00:14:35,577 --> 00:14:37,377 - You baked these? - Mm-hmm. 314 00:14:37,412 --> 00:14:39,045 He baked these. 315 00:14:39,080 --> 00:14:42,215 I told him he doesn't have to. Marmalade? 316 00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:48,137 This is such a treat. 317 00:14:48,173 --> 00:14:50,923 Oh, by the way, bravo on the show. 318 00:14:50,925 --> 00:14:53,092 We heard you were cancelled. Now you're not. 319 00:14:53,094 --> 00:14:57,063 More episodes of Pucks! Yay. 320 00:14:57,098 --> 00:15:00,516 Actually, uh, that's why we're here. 321 00:15:00,568 --> 00:15:02,435 Whatever they're saying officially, 322 00:15:02,437 --> 00:15:05,021 our show is definitely over. 323 00:15:05,073 --> 00:15:06,823 No! 324 00:15:06,858 --> 00:15:08,775 I thought they ordered six more. 325 00:15:08,777 --> 00:15:10,493 They did, but it was just a ploy 326 00:15:10,528 --> 00:15:12,945 to keep Matt from doing your show. 327 00:15:12,947 --> 00:15:14,580 Those buggers. 328 00:15:14,616 --> 00:15:16,949 Guess I'm more important than I thought. 329 00:15:17,952 --> 00:15:18,951 I guess. 330 00:15:18,953 --> 00:15:20,870 Anyway, the point is, 331 00:15:20,922 --> 00:15:25,208 since our show is dead, we wanted to put it out there-- 332 00:15:25,260 --> 00:15:28,678 Oh, wow. Awkward! 333 00:15:28,713 --> 00:15:31,631 I haven't even started hiring writers yet. 334 00:15:31,683 --> 00:15:33,216 What? 335 00:15:33,268 --> 00:15:34,634 You know I think you're both beyond brilliant. 336 00:15:34,636 --> 00:15:35,635 It's just not quite the right fit. 337 00:15:35,687 --> 00:15:37,103 No, no-- 338 00:15:37,138 --> 00:15:38,771 I'm just going for something a bit younger. 339 00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:40,973 We're not here looking for work. 340 00:15:41,026 --> 00:15:42,475 Whatever you say. 341 00:15:42,527 --> 00:15:44,644 Actually, we have a show that three networks 342 00:15:44,646 --> 00:15:45,645 are competing for. 343 00:15:45,647 --> 00:15:47,730 I'm sure you do. 344 00:15:47,782 --> 00:15:49,899 - We're here on Matt's behalf. - Oh? 345 00:15:49,951 --> 00:15:52,452 He felt it was important that you know Pucks! is 346 00:15:52,487 --> 00:15:56,622 really finished, so you might reconsider him for the part. 347 00:15:56,658 --> 00:15:59,375 Oh. Yeah, that won't happen. 348 00:15:59,411 --> 00:16:01,127 Unless he's legally free and clear, 349 00:16:01,162 --> 00:16:02,442 the network will never go for it. 350 00:16:02,464 --> 00:16:05,465 And, uh, just between us, 351 00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:07,250 I think we can do better. 352 00:16:09,888 --> 00:16:11,337 Lemon curd? 353 00:16:13,925 --> 00:16:16,092 It was so lovely to meet you. 354 00:16:16,144 --> 00:16:17,343 - Scones for the road? - No, thank you. 355 00:16:17,345 --> 00:16:19,512 Yeah, fine. 356 00:16:22,567 --> 00:16:23,850 You're fired. 357 00:16:23,902 --> 00:16:25,985 - I'm what? - Nothing. 358 00:16:34,362 --> 00:16:37,447 Hey. How's our guy doing? 359 00:16:37,499 --> 00:16:38,865 Well, he's still standing. 360 00:16:40,368 --> 00:16:43,536 - He's no Beckham. - Not even Victoria. 361 00:16:46,207 --> 00:16:48,174 - Where's Ollie? - Work. 362 00:16:50,345 --> 00:16:51,711 So when's the big day? 363 00:16:51,763 --> 00:16:53,346 What do you care? You're not invited. 364 00:16:53,381 --> 00:16:55,882 Really? I was kind of hoping to give you away. 365 00:17:01,222 --> 00:17:02,855 Is he running in the wrong direction? 366 00:17:02,891 --> 00:17:05,858 Uh-huh. 367 00:17:05,894 --> 00:17:10,279 Well, at least he's getting exercise. 368 00:17:10,315 --> 00:17:13,733 So, uh, you guys set a date yet? 369 00:17:13,785 --> 00:17:16,452 Just asking. I'm excited for you. 370 00:17:16,488 --> 00:17:21,157 No, no date. If it happens, it happens. 371 00:17:21,209 --> 00:17:24,076 - What does that mean? - It means... 372 00:17:24,078 --> 00:17:25,745 - it might not happen. - What? 373 00:17:25,797 --> 00:17:28,080 Michael! Honey, stand up! 374 00:17:28,133 --> 00:17:31,968 Someone's gonna trip on you! 375 00:17:32,003 --> 00:17:33,586 What do you mean it might not happen? 376 00:17:35,256 --> 00:17:38,591 Lately it just isn't feeling like such a great idea. 377 00:17:38,593 --> 00:17:41,561 That's crazy. You gotta marry him. 378 00:17:41,596 --> 00:17:44,096 - It's--it's Ollie! - You never even met him. 379 00:17:44,149 --> 00:17:46,599 I know, but you said he's such a great guy. 380 00:17:46,601 --> 00:17:51,103 He is, but he's got issues. 381 00:17:51,105 --> 00:17:52,738 What kind of issues? 382 00:17:52,774 --> 00:17:56,776 Like hostility issues. He can be mean. 383 00:17:56,828 --> 00:17:59,412 Mean. Who isn't mean? 384 00:17:59,447 --> 00:18:01,614 You're mean, I'm mean. Come on. 385 00:18:01,616 --> 00:18:03,950 I'm talking mean. 386 00:18:04,002 --> 00:18:06,369 Sometimes there's a lot of rage there. 387 00:18:06,421 --> 00:18:09,956 Define rage. 388 00:18:10,008 --> 00:18:11,624 What are you doing? 389 00:18:11,676 --> 00:18:13,759 I don't want you to throw away something good. 390 00:18:13,795 --> 00:18:15,428 Even if he's sometimes abusive? 391 00:18:15,463 --> 00:18:16,712 What kind of abusive? 392 00:18:16,764 --> 00:18:18,214 Well, not physically, but-- 393 00:18:18,266 --> 00:18:21,100 Then what are we even talking about? 394 00:18:24,772 --> 00:18:27,974 You told her to go back to the man with the rage? 395 00:18:27,976 --> 00:18:29,475 Sometimes rage. 396 00:18:29,527 --> 00:18:31,227 Okay, forget Diane. 397 00:18:31,279 --> 00:18:34,063 Do you really want your children growing up 398 00:18:34,115 --> 00:18:37,116 in this potentially unhappy situation 399 00:18:37,151 --> 00:18:40,536 with this abusive man? 400 00:18:40,572 --> 00:18:42,488 The savings are significant. 401 00:18:42,490 --> 00:18:44,323 For which you're prepared to consign them 402 00:18:44,375 --> 00:18:46,209 to a miserable childhood? 403 00:18:46,244 --> 00:18:50,463 It's childhood. It's over before you know it. 404 00:18:50,498 --> 00:18:52,632 You should never have been given sperm. 405 00:18:52,667 --> 00:18:55,251 Look, obviously you can't put a price 406 00:18:55,303 --> 00:18:57,670 on your children's happiness, 407 00:18:57,672 --> 00:18:58,971 but it turns out you can. 408 00:18:59,007 --> 00:19:02,341 They showed me a spreadsheet. 409 00:19:02,343 --> 00:19:04,677 I'm out. 410 00:19:04,679 --> 00:19:08,481 Oh, guess who we saw today in all his unrelenting smarminess. 411 00:19:08,516 --> 00:19:09,899 - You saw Andrew Lesley? - Uh-huh. 412 00:19:09,934 --> 00:19:11,183 - And? - It's never gonna happen. 413 00:19:11,185 --> 00:19:12,768 What? 414 00:19:12,820 --> 00:19:14,186 As long as you're legally contracted to our show, 415 00:19:14,239 --> 00:19:15,238 they're never gonna give you the part. 416 00:19:15,273 --> 00:19:17,440 Ugh. "Legally." 417 00:19:17,492 --> 00:19:19,025 What does that even mean? 418 00:19:19,027 --> 00:19:21,277 Uh, enforceable by law. 419 00:19:22,997 --> 00:19:26,532 That is hard to argue with. 420 00:19:26,584 --> 00:19:27,700 Oh. 421 00:19:30,955 --> 00:19:32,622 What's this? 422 00:19:32,674 --> 00:19:34,590 I brought you a little thank-you gift from my vineyard, 423 00:19:34,626 --> 00:19:37,627 even though it turns out there's nothing to thank you for. 424 00:19:37,679 --> 00:19:40,379 - "LeBlanc de Blanc"? - Eh? 425 00:19:40,381 --> 00:19:44,133 I'm guessing it's not a very complex wine. 426 00:19:47,055 --> 00:19:50,356 Why are you even bothering to meet with those other networks? 427 00:19:50,391 --> 00:19:52,558 Because in all likelihood, 428 00:19:52,610 --> 00:19:54,193 we're not giving our show to yours. 429 00:19:54,228 --> 00:19:57,363 What? You have to give it to us. 430 00:19:57,398 --> 00:19:58,364 Because why? 431 00:19:58,399 --> 00:20:00,449 What about this? 432 00:20:00,485 --> 00:20:03,202 Yeah, that hasn't exactly paid big dividends 433 00:20:03,237 --> 00:20:06,205 on a professional level. 434 00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:09,325 Okay, how is it going to look to my new boss 435 00:20:09,377 --> 00:20:12,962 if my best friend gives her show to someone else? 436 00:20:12,997 --> 00:20:15,164 I'm your best friend? 437 00:20:15,216 --> 00:20:17,750 Well, probably. 438 00:20:17,752 --> 00:20:20,670 - Who's your best friend? - Uh... 439 00:20:20,722 --> 00:20:26,676 I don't have a best friend because I'm not seven. 440 00:20:26,728 --> 00:20:28,260 You can be very hurtful. 441 00:20:34,268 --> 00:20:36,402 You'll see. 442 00:20:36,437 --> 00:20:37,687 I'll see what? 443 00:20:37,739 --> 00:20:39,522 You're gonna give us that show. 444 00:20:39,574 --> 00:20:42,274 Because you did such a bang-up job with our last show? 445 00:20:42,327 --> 00:20:46,195 Ha ha. No, because Helen's amazing. 446 00:20:46,247 --> 00:20:49,532 She's the best executive I've ever worked with. 447 00:20:49,584 --> 00:20:51,250 You realize how low the bar is? 448 00:20:51,285 --> 00:20:55,204 I do, yes. I do. 449 00:21:02,380 --> 00:21:03,379 Hey. 450 00:21:03,431 --> 00:21:06,098 - Hey. - Are they ready? 451 00:21:06,134 --> 00:21:09,051 Guys, come get your stuff. Daddy's here! 452 00:21:09,103 --> 00:21:11,187 Uh, don't forget Aiden's got that, 453 00:21:11,222 --> 00:21:12,938 uh, whatchamacallit this afternoon. 454 00:21:12,974 --> 00:21:15,725 Oh, right. 455 00:21:15,777 --> 00:21:16,892 What are you doing? 456 00:21:16,944 --> 00:21:18,811 - Oh, you want some? - No. 457 00:21:18,863 --> 00:21:23,616 They're his vitamins. They're children's vitamins. 458 00:21:23,651 --> 00:21:25,201 Really good. 459 00:21:25,236 --> 00:21:28,404 So, uh, where are we with Ollie? 460 00:21:28,456 --> 00:21:31,240 Seriously? Again with Ollie? 461 00:21:31,292 --> 00:21:34,293 I'm sorry, I'm invested. 462 00:21:34,328 --> 00:21:36,712 So-- 463 00:21:36,748 --> 00:21:39,131 - It's over. - Ov--wh-- 464 00:21:39,167 --> 00:21:41,217 - What do you mean over? - I don't want to talk about it. 465 00:21:41,252 --> 00:21:43,135 But we decided you were gonna give it a chance. 466 00:21:43,171 --> 00:21:45,554 I gave it a chance. Boys! 467 00:21:45,590 --> 00:21:48,174 Okay, is this still about the abusive thing? 468 00:21:48,226 --> 00:21:51,143 'Cause, no offense, sometimes your expectations 469 00:21:51,179 --> 00:21:54,597 can be a little unrealistic. 470 00:21:54,649 --> 00:21:56,182 Aiden, Michael, move it! 471 00:21:56,184 --> 00:21:57,767 Your father's starting to piss me off. 472 00:21:57,819 --> 00:22:00,603 So that's it? It's just--just over? 473 00:22:00,655 --> 00:22:02,104 Yeah. Over. 474 00:22:02,156 --> 00:22:05,408 Oh, Jesus. 475 00:22:05,443 --> 00:22:07,493 Are those tears in your eyes? 476 00:22:07,528 --> 00:22:09,695 This is very upsetting. 477 00:22:13,167 --> 00:22:16,285 Hi, guys. So sorry I'm late. 478 00:22:16,337 --> 00:22:17,670 Are you all right? What happened to your head? 479 00:22:17,705 --> 00:22:21,624 Oh, it's fine. I just fell off my desk. 480 00:22:21,676 --> 00:22:23,509 If everybody's here, they're ready. 481 00:22:23,544 --> 00:22:26,178 Great. After you. 482 00:22:26,214 --> 00:22:28,297 We love this show. 483 00:22:28,349 --> 00:22:30,182 - Oh, that's very kind. - Oh, thank you. 484 00:22:30,218 --> 00:22:32,218 It's funny. It's clever. 485 00:22:32,270 --> 00:22:34,720 You can totally tell that English people wrote it. 486 00:22:34,772 --> 00:22:37,223 Everything you all do is so smart. 487 00:22:37,275 --> 00:22:39,391 And yet you felt you needed your own country. 488 00:22:40,528 --> 00:22:43,279 Exactly. 489 00:22:43,314 --> 00:22:45,564 One question we do have though, 490 00:22:45,566 --> 00:22:49,923 the doubling, where all the actors play two parts... 491 00:22:51,572 --> 00:22:53,906 It's not quite a question yet. 492 00:22:53,958 --> 00:22:56,158 Are you married to that? 493 00:22:56,210 --> 00:22:57,209 Happily. 494 00:22:57,245 --> 00:22:58,661 Yeah, without the doubling, 495 00:22:58,713 --> 00:23:00,629 it's really just a show about two families. 496 00:23:00,665 --> 00:23:03,215 The doubling's what makes it distinctive. 497 00:23:03,251 --> 00:23:06,051 Or...gimmicky? 498 00:23:06,087 --> 00:23:08,804 I'm gonna stick with distinctive, 499 00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:13,142 but I'll go to my grave remembering gimmicky. 500 00:23:18,399 --> 00:23:20,483 We love this. It's yummy. 501 00:23:20,518 --> 00:23:22,685 It's delicious. I want to eat it. 502 00:23:22,737 --> 00:23:23,769 It's that delicious. 503 00:23:23,771 --> 00:23:25,771 - Oh, thank you. - Bon appetit. 504 00:23:25,823 --> 00:23:27,690 There are some great parts in here. 505 00:23:27,742 --> 00:23:30,276 I think we can attract some major talent. 506 00:23:30,278 --> 00:23:31,861 Mm-hmm. 507 00:23:31,913 --> 00:23:35,865 Actually, um, after our experience on Pucks!, 508 00:23:35,917 --> 00:23:39,368 we're not really keen on going with big names. 509 00:23:39,420 --> 00:23:42,872 Got it. Totally hear you. 510 00:23:42,924 --> 00:23:46,258 But say we could get someone like, I don't know, 511 00:23:46,294 --> 00:23:48,761 Anthony Hopkins for the father... 512 00:23:48,796 --> 00:23:53,015 Uh, right, but he would be a big name. 513 00:23:53,050 --> 00:23:55,801 No, of course. I don't mean him per se. 514 00:23:55,803 --> 00:23:59,855 I'm talking about an Anthony Hopkins type. 515 00:23:59,891 --> 00:24:01,724 Oh, well, that would be fine. 516 00:24:01,776 --> 00:24:06,228 Like Donald Sutherland. 517 00:24:06,280 --> 00:24:09,481 Again, that's a big name. 518 00:24:09,534 --> 00:24:11,200 Gotcha. I'm with you. 519 00:24:11,235 --> 00:24:14,870 I--I just mean someone Donald Sutherland-esque. 520 00:24:14,906 --> 00:24:19,291 - Okay. - Like Christopher Plummer. 521 00:24:19,327 --> 00:24:21,327 - Again-- - Yeah, yeah. 522 00:24:21,329 --> 00:24:22,578 You know what I mean. 523 00:24:23,915 --> 00:24:27,633 I think we do. 524 00:24:27,668 --> 00:24:30,302 All right, so this is fantastic. 525 00:24:30,338 --> 00:24:32,888 It's sophisticated and hilarious, 526 00:24:32,924 --> 00:24:34,473 and you've been hearing that stuff all day long. 527 00:24:34,508 --> 00:24:36,725 But not yet tired of it. 528 00:24:36,761 --> 00:24:38,510 Well, kudos on being brilliant. 529 00:24:38,512 --> 00:24:42,097 Now, what questions do you have for us? 530 00:24:42,149 --> 00:24:44,316 - Um... - Uh... 531 00:24:44,352 --> 00:24:45,901 we didn't know it could go that way. 532 00:24:45,937 --> 00:24:47,820 Refreshing! 533 00:24:47,855 --> 00:24:49,822 Do we have any questions? 534 00:24:49,857 --> 00:24:52,441 Uh, okay. 535 00:24:52,493 --> 00:24:54,693 It's been suggested that we might want 536 00:24:54,745 --> 00:24:56,612 to eliminate the doubling. 537 00:24:56,664 --> 00:25:00,199 Why? I love the doubling. The doubling is the key. 538 00:25:00,251 --> 00:25:03,168 Otherwise it's just a show about two families. 539 00:25:03,204 --> 00:25:05,704 Exactly. 540 00:25:05,756 --> 00:25:07,873 Uh, any thoughts on casting? 541 00:25:07,925 --> 00:25:10,209 I already told these guys I showed the script 542 00:25:10,211 --> 00:25:13,596 to Susan Sarandon, who was very hot on it. 543 00:25:13,631 --> 00:25:15,931 I mentioned Goldie Hawn, although she's no longer 544 00:25:15,967 --> 00:25:18,050 a client, so I think we can do better. 545 00:25:18,102 --> 00:25:20,519 Look, we'll do whatever you want, 546 00:25:20,554 --> 00:25:24,974 but are you dead set on going with big names? 547 00:25:25,026 --> 00:25:26,358 Uh, no. 548 00:25:26,394 --> 00:25:27,476 I feel like, with a script this strong, 549 00:25:27,528 --> 00:25:28,978 you don't need names. 550 00:25:29,030 --> 00:25:32,448 I mean, if you look at just about any big comedy 551 00:25:32,483 --> 00:25:34,400 from the last 20 years, they started out 552 00:25:34,402 --> 00:25:37,036 with really good actors and made them stars, 553 00:25:37,071 --> 00:25:38,537 not the other way around. 554 00:25:38,572 --> 00:25:40,406 - Interesting. - Hey. 555 00:25:40,458 --> 00:25:42,978 And if the show's a hit, you'll end up paying them just as much, 556 00:25:42,994 --> 00:25:46,161 and they'll wind up just as crazy, so why start there? 557 00:25:46,213 --> 00:25:48,247 This is your star. 558 00:25:51,135 --> 00:25:55,054 - Look at you, all smug. - Not smug, happy. 559 00:25:55,089 --> 00:25:58,340 All right, 80% happy, 20% smug, 560 00:25:58,392 --> 00:26:00,175 with a little extra smug in reserve. 561 00:26:00,227 --> 00:26:02,845 Ooh. 562 00:26:02,897 --> 00:26:04,847 Oh, come on, she's fantastic. 563 00:26:04,899 --> 00:26:06,849 There's nothing remotely fuckwit about her. 564 00:26:09,854 --> 00:26:14,573 So, was I right? She's great, right? 565 00:26:14,608 --> 00:26:16,775 She's very impressive. 566 00:26:16,777 --> 00:26:18,744 And? 567 00:26:18,779 --> 00:26:20,362 And she clearly gets 568 00:26:20,414 --> 00:26:24,083 what's good about the show. 569 00:26:24,118 --> 00:26:25,367 So? 570 00:26:30,875 --> 00:26:33,292 Well, compared to the other idiots we met today, 571 00:26:33,294 --> 00:26:35,844 she's obviously head and shoulders-- 572 00:26:35,880 --> 00:26:39,631 Oh, Jesus, just tell me we're getting the fucking show. 573 00:26:44,555 --> 00:26:49,725 I have grave misgivings, it's probably a huge mistake, 574 00:26:49,777 --> 00:26:52,528 and I'm sure there'll come a day when I regret this. 575 00:26:52,563 --> 00:26:55,781 So it's a yes! Yay! 576 00:27:03,991 --> 00:27:06,158 Hey, Jose. 577 00:27:10,581 --> 00:27:12,464 You know I think you're fantastic, 578 00:27:12,500 --> 00:27:14,500 and this has got nothing to do with you. 579 00:27:14,552 --> 00:27:19,004 I mean, this beach is-- 580 00:27:21,175 --> 00:27:23,008 But unfortunately I'm having to make 581 00:27:23,060 --> 00:27:25,594 some tough financial decisions. 582 00:27:25,646 --> 00:27:26,729 I don't know if you saw the trades, 583 00:27:26,764 --> 00:27:28,347 but there's been a whole scandal. 584 00:27:28,399 --> 00:27:31,600 My business manager totally fucked me over, and-- 585 00:27:31,652 --> 00:27:35,104 well, you can imagine, it's been a nightmare. 586 00:27:35,156 --> 00:27:38,907 They want me to sell my plane. I mean, that's not gonna happen. 587 00:27:38,943 --> 00:27:40,692 You got to draw a line somewhere. 588 00:27:42,446 --> 00:27:47,199 But sadly I do have to make some cutbacks. 589 00:27:47,251 --> 00:27:50,836 So I wanted to thank you for 18 years. 590 00:27:50,871 --> 00:27:55,841 I can't believe it, but today needs to be our last day. 591 00:27:55,876 --> 00:27:58,844 If you could just grab that little bit of seaweed shit 592 00:27:58,879 --> 00:28:01,964 over there, I think we're good. 593 00:28:02,016 --> 00:28:05,717 Also, I actually don't know if that's your rake or my rake, 594 00:28:05,770 --> 00:28:10,556 but by all means--huh? 595 00:28:10,558 --> 00:28:13,192 And again, thank you. 596 00:28:15,229 --> 00:28:17,196 Oh, there's part of a dead seagull over there. 597 00:28:17,231 --> 00:28:20,096 If you could just grab that, that'd be great, yeah? 598 00:28:25,230 --> 00:28:35,686 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com