1
00:00:00,042 --> 00:00:03,643
[keys clacking]
2
00:00:03,679 --> 00:00:07,681
- I have been hearing such great
things about your new show.
3
00:00:07,716 --> 00:00:08,949
- Have you?
- Oh, that's so nice.
4
00:00:08,984 --> 00:00:11,718
- Word around town?
A-ma-zing.
5
00:00:11,753 --> 00:00:12,819
- Lunch is on me.
6
00:00:12,854 --> 00:00:14,321
- Lunch is always on you.
7
00:00:14,356 --> 00:00:16,256
What'd help is a job.
You got one of those?
8
00:00:16,291 --> 00:00:17,857
- [chuckling]
hey, i'm not a magician.
9
00:00:17,893 --> 00:00:20,026
- Yeah, well, you better
pull something out of your ass.
10
00:00:20,062 --> 00:00:22,195
- What magic shows
did you go to?
11
00:00:22,230 --> 00:00:24,364
- I need a pet name for helen.
12
00:00:24,399 --> 00:00:27,167
- Really?
Pet names already?
13
00:00:27,202 --> 00:00:29,069
- I know.
14
00:00:29,104 --> 00:00:32,372
It's like we're on some kind
of accelerated lesbian calendar.
15
00:00:32,407 --> 00:00:34,808
Like, three days is a week.
16
00:00:34,843 --> 00:00:37,844
If i were a dog,
i'd be dead by now.
17
00:00:40,182 --> 00:00:42,682
[keys clacking]
18
00:00:50,459 --> 00:00:53,660
[wind blows]
19
00:00:53,695 --> 00:00:56,529
[quirky music]
20
00:00:56,565 --> 00:01:04,604
⪠âª
21
00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:12,074
For Important Kodi Updates and the Chance to Win an
NVIDIA Shield TV - Visit www.tvaddons.co/december
22
00:01:19,855 --> 00:01:21,955
[gunshot]
23
00:01:32,267 --> 00:01:33,600
- Hey, look at this.
24
00:01:33,635 --> 00:01:35,035
It's the set model
for our new show.
25
00:01:35,070 --> 00:01:36,870
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
26
00:01:36,905 --> 00:01:40,440
They're actually building
the entire house on the stage.
27
00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:44,077
Three stories,
and all these walls come out,
28
00:01:44,112 --> 00:01:47,113
So they can shoot from one floor
to another.
29
00:01:47,149 --> 00:01:48,782
- Huh.
30
00:01:48,817 --> 00:01:50,950
Anyway, you got to see this.
31
00:01:53,722 --> 00:01:56,356
- Well, that's a vagina.
32
00:01:56,391 --> 00:01:58,124
- Yeah. My kid did it.
33
00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:01,261
- Aw, even more disturbing.
34
00:02:01,296 --> 00:02:04,497
- Not the six-year-old,
the eight-year-old.
35
00:02:04,533 --> 00:02:05,832
- How are you not in prison?
36
00:02:05,867 --> 00:02:07,200
- Come on. It's art.
37
00:02:07,235 --> 00:02:08,501
- Or evidence.
38
00:02:08,537 --> 00:02:09,969
- Picture's up.
39
00:02:10,005 --> 00:02:11,705
- All right,
got to go be somewhat amusing.
40
00:02:11,740 --> 00:02:12,672
Can i leave this here?
41
00:02:12,708 --> 00:02:13,973
- No.
42
00:02:14,009 --> 00:02:16,443
Please take your twat and go.
43
00:02:16,478 --> 00:02:17,577
- [scoffs]
44
00:02:17,612 --> 00:02:19,479
Hey, check it out.
My kid did this.
45
00:02:19,514 --> 00:02:21,581
- You know
what really bothers me?
46
00:02:21,616 --> 00:02:23,783
- Besides the eight-year-old
drawing beaver shots?
47
00:02:23,819 --> 00:02:26,486
- You notice he wasn't
the least bit interested
48
00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:28,121
In our thing.
49
00:02:28,156 --> 00:02:30,623
- Well, i've got to say,
a set model versus kiddie porn?
50
00:02:30,659 --> 00:02:32,292
- No, that's not the point.
51
00:02:32,327 --> 00:02:34,828
If it's not about him,
he couldn't care less.
52
00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:37,397
- Right, he's self-involved.
He's narcissistic.
53
00:02:37,432 --> 00:02:38,398
He's...
[gasps]
54
00:02:38,433 --> 00:02:39,733
An actor.
55
00:02:39,768 --> 00:02:41,067
I know it's hard to remember
56
00:02:41,103 --> 00:02:42,469
Given his work on this show.
57
00:02:42,504 --> 00:02:45,004
- Just so bloody one-sided.
58
00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:47,907
You realize he's never even
asked to read our script?
59
00:02:47,943 --> 00:02:49,642
Everyone in town has read it.
60
00:02:49,678 --> 00:02:52,278
Wouldn't you think
he'd be slightly curious?
61
00:02:52,314 --> 00:02:53,980
- Maybe he read it
and didn't like it.
62
00:02:54,015 --> 00:02:56,182
Maybe he's just trying
to spare our feelings.
63
00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:58,218
- Does that sound like him?
- Mm.
64
00:02:58,253 --> 00:03:00,754
Well, then, if he doesn't want
to read it, who cares?
65
00:03:00,789 --> 00:03:03,523
What, you need
his informed literary opinion?
66
00:03:03,558 --> 00:03:04,758
- No, it's just--
67
00:03:04,793 --> 00:03:06,926
- Who he is.
68
00:03:06,962 --> 00:03:09,329
Please let it go.
69
00:03:09,364 --> 00:03:12,866
Just compliment his son's vagina
and leave it at that.
70
00:03:18,707 --> 00:03:21,508
- So we, um--
71
00:03:21,543 --> 00:03:24,210
We have our first notes
on the script for the new show.
72
00:03:24,246 --> 00:03:25,512
- Yeah?
- Mm.
73
00:03:25,547 --> 00:03:27,480
It's amazing.
Virtually nothing.
74
00:03:27,516 --> 00:03:29,916
- Wow.
75
00:03:29,951 --> 00:03:33,920
- It's a little disconcerting,
all this unbridled praise.
76
00:03:33,955 --> 00:03:35,622
Everyone just seems to love it.
77
00:03:35,657 --> 00:03:37,023
- That's great.
78
00:03:37,058 --> 00:03:39,893
I'm thinking of getting a drone.
- A drone?
79
00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:41,161
- Yeah, anyone can buy them now.
80
00:03:41,196 --> 00:03:42,462
- What would you do
with a drone?
81
00:03:42,497 --> 00:03:44,898
- I don't know, drone stuff.
82
00:03:44,933 --> 00:03:46,466
Look at the tops of birds,
83
00:03:46,501 --> 00:03:47,834
See my roof,
84
00:03:47,869 --> 00:03:49,903
Drop shit
on burt bacharach's house.
85
00:03:49,938 --> 00:03:52,806
- Why burt bacharach?
- It's a whole thing.
86
00:03:52,841 --> 00:03:56,676
But he'll know.
87
00:03:56,711 --> 00:03:59,078
- So you haven't by any chance
read it, have you?
88
00:03:59,114 --> 00:04:00,413
- What?
89
00:04:00,448 --> 00:04:01,748
- Our script.
- No.
90
00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,383
- Oh, good.
91
00:04:03,418 --> 00:04:05,552
For a second, i was afraid
you might be the one person
92
00:04:05,587 --> 00:04:07,720
Who read it
and didn't love it.
93
00:04:07,756 --> 00:04:10,323
- Oh, not to worry.
94
00:04:10,358 --> 00:04:12,091
I could take pictures
of suzanne somers.
95
00:04:12,127 --> 00:04:13,493
- What?
- With my drone.
96
00:04:13,528 --> 00:04:15,061
She lives next to me.
97
00:04:15,096 --> 00:04:19,098
Her gardener told my gardener
that she lies out naked.
98
00:04:19,134 --> 00:04:21,467
I'd drone that.
- Right.
99
00:04:21,503 --> 00:04:23,636
[exhales]
100
00:04:23,672 --> 00:04:24,904
Quick question.
- Hmm?
101
00:04:24,940 --> 00:04:26,573
- What is wrong with you?
102
00:04:26,608 --> 00:04:28,308
Why don't you want to read it?
- What?
103
00:04:28,343 --> 00:04:31,444
- Our script.
Why don't you want to read it?
104
00:04:31,479 --> 00:04:33,279
- Whoa, okay, fine.
I'll read it.
105
00:04:33,315 --> 00:04:34,781
- Oh, no,
don't do me any favors.
106
00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:36,482
I don't need a mercy read.
107
00:04:36,518 --> 00:04:38,751
- All right.
108
00:04:38,787 --> 00:04:41,287
- Seriously?
You're not gonna read it?
109
00:04:41,323 --> 00:04:42,989
- Okay, i don't know
what you want here.
110
00:04:43,024 --> 00:04:45,658
- I would like, just for once,
for you to be interested
111
00:04:45,694 --> 00:04:47,794
In something
that's important to me.
112
00:04:47,829 --> 00:04:49,395
- Shouldn't we be
sleeping together
113
00:04:49,431 --> 00:04:50,663
To be having this conversation?
114
00:04:50,699 --> 00:04:52,098
- Fine.
115
00:04:54,169 --> 00:04:56,269
- [exhales]
please can i read your script?
116
00:04:56,304 --> 00:04:57,437
- No.
117
00:04:57,472 --> 00:04:58,738
- You're right. I'm sorry.
118
00:04:58,773 --> 00:05:01,374
I'm a selfish asshole.
- Agreed.
119
00:05:01,409 --> 00:05:03,509
- I really want to read it.
120
00:05:03,545 --> 00:05:05,979
- Really?
- Yes.
121
00:05:08,383 --> 00:05:10,316
- All right.
122
00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:11,618
As long as you're not doing it
123
00:05:11,653 --> 00:05:13,186
Just because i pressured you
into it.
124
00:05:13,221 --> 00:05:14,554
- Oh, well...
- What?
125
00:05:14,589 --> 00:05:18,291
- I'm kidding. Jesus.
126
00:05:18,326 --> 00:05:21,060
And by the way,
i know i don't say it enough,
127
00:05:21,096 --> 00:05:24,297
But you're the prettiest girl
in the room.
128
00:05:28,570 --> 00:05:31,271
Yeah, that's gonna be on tmz.
129
00:05:31,306 --> 00:05:33,406
[keys clacking]
130
00:05:33,441 --> 00:05:36,042
- Where are we
on the angry men rewrite?
131
00:05:36,077 --> 00:05:38,778
- I think some of them
are still too angry.
132
00:05:38,813 --> 00:05:41,814
- [sighs]
is he ever gonna get there?
133
00:05:41,850 --> 00:05:43,616
Should we just pull the plug
on this thing?
134
00:05:43,652 --> 00:05:45,451
- Probably.
I don't think he's capab--
135
00:05:45,487 --> 00:05:46,586
[gags]
136
00:05:50,759 --> 00:05:51,858
- Are you okay?
137
00:05:51,893 --> 00:05:53,793
- Mm-hmm.
[swallows]
138
00:05:53,828 --> 00:05:55,194
Sorry.
139
00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:57,363
I just don't think he's--
[gags]
140
00:05:57,399 --> 00:05:59,565
- Do you need to--
- mm-hmm.
141
00:06:03,705 --> 00:06:05,071
- Wow.
142
00:06:05,106 --> 00:06:06,673
- Do you think
she's ever gonna tell us?
143
00:06:06,708 --> 00:06:07,907
- Are we absolutely sure?
144
00:06:07,943 --> 00:06:09,275
- Oh, please.
145
00:06:09,311 --> 00:06:11,177
- What month do you think
she's in?
146
00:06:11,212 --> 00:06:12,612
- 11th? 12th?
147
00:06:12,647 --> 00:06:14,547
- And there's definitely
no boyfriend?
148
00:06:14,582 --> 00:06:16,215
- Not that i know of.
149
00:06:16,251 --> 00:06:17,750
She lives alone.
150
00:06:17,786 --> 00:06:19,719
She just has those two cats.
151
00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:21,120
- Maybe she's having a cliché.
152
00:06:21,156 --> 00:06:22,455
- Oh.
153
00:06:22,490 --> 00:06:23,957
[intercom buzzes]
154
00:06:23,992 --> 00:06:26,960
- Carol, helen needs to see you.
155
00:06:26,995 --> 00:06:28,728
- Okay.
156
00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:29,896
Right back.
157
00:06:44,245 --> 00:06:45,244
- Morning.
158
00:06:45,280 --> 00:06:46,446
- Hey.
159
00:06:53,355 --> 00:06:54,554
- How was your weekend?
160
00:06:54,589 --> 00:06:56,622
- Eh, quiet.
161
00:07:00,428 --> 00:07:02,095
- What did you do?
162
00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:03,629
- Nothing, really.
163
00:07:03,665 --> 00:07:07,400
Hung out, watched tv.
164
00:07:09,170 --> 00:07:10,770
- Read anything?
165
00:07:10,805 --> 00:07:12,572
- Actually, i'm reading
this book on tape.
166
00:07:12,607 --> 00:07:14,107
It's really cool.
167
00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:15,975
It's about how
if hitler had won the war--
168
00:07:16,011 --> 00:07:17,777
I'll tell you,
we sure dodged a bullet there.
169
00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:18,945
[chuckles]
170
00:07:23,018 --> 00:07:24,951
What?
171
00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:34,560
Oh! Oh, oh, right.
- Right.
172
00:07:34,596 --> 00:07:36,696
- I'm gonna get to it
as soon as i get a free minute.
173
00:07:36,731 --> 00:07:38,297
- You had
the whole bloody weekend.
174
00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:39,265
- I said i'll read it.
175
00:07:39,300 --> 00:07:41,534
- It's 28 pages.
176
00:07:41,569 --> 00:07:43,469
It's not the fucking goldfinch.
177
00:07:43,505 --> 00:07:45,772
- I don't know--
- it's a thick book.
178
00:07:45,807 --> 00:07:47,807
- Got you.
- Unbelievable.
179
00:07:52,514 --> 00:07:55,014
- Knock, knock.
What's up?
180
00:07:55,050 --> 00:07:59,152
- I believe there is something
for you on my desk.
181
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:01,320
- What is this?
182
00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:02,522
What did you do?
183
00:08:02,557 --> 00:08:03,990
- Open it.
184
00:08:04,025 --> 00:08:07,460
- [sighs]
you should not have done this.
185
00:08:07,495 --> 00:08:08,628
[chuckles]
186
00:08:10,665 --> 00:08:13,733
Oh, my god.
187
00:08:13,768 --> 00:08:16,202
This is--
188
00:08:18,073 --> 00:08:20,840
No one has ever--
189
00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:23,042
I can't even--
190
00:08:23,078 --> 00:08:25,378
I can't--
191
00:08:25,413 --> 00:08:27,046
I can't--
192
00:08:27,082 --> 00:08:28,681
I can't breathe.
193
00:08:28,716 --> 00:08:30,516
- Calm down.
You're breathing.
194
00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:31,751
- A key?
195
00:08:31,786 --> 00:08:33,286
After two weeks?
196
00:08:33,321 --> 00:08:36,255
It's just--
it's too much too fast.
197
00:08:36,291 --> 00:08:38,191
Oh, did i tell you?
198
00:08:38,226 --> 00:08:40,393
She already invited me
to stanford
199
00:08:40,428 --> 00:08:41,761
For her daughter's graduation.
200
00:08:41,796 --> 00:08:43,696
- Aw.
- In june.
201
00:08:43,731 --> 00:08:45,298
- Well, that's not so--
202
00:08:45,333 --> 00:08:47,667
- No, not this june.
Next june.
203
00:08:47,702 --> 00:08:50,303
- Oh.
- Oh, god.
204
00:08:50,338 --> 00:08:52,872
What is wrong with me?
205
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:54,874
I should be happy.
206
00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:57,743
This--
it's like a dream come true,
207
00:08:57,779 --> 00:08:59,679
And i'm getting hives.
208
00:08:59,714 --> 00:09:02,048
- Oh,
that is definitely hive-y.
209
00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:03,282
- All right, stop looking.
210
00:09:03,318 --> 00:09:04,550
- Okay. Okay, listen.
211
00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:08,287
You have to tell her
how you feel.
212
00:09:08,323 --> 00:09:10,056
- Nyeh.
213
00:09:10,091 --> 00:09:13,092
- You can't spend an entire
relationship on antihistamines.
214
00:09:13,128 --> 00:09:15,428
- Wh-what am i supposed to say?
215
00:09:15,463 --> 00:09:16,796
"less love, please."
216
00:09:16,831 --> 00:09:20,233
I--i don't want to hurt her.
217
00:09:20,268 --> 00:09:23,236
- You're just asking her
to slow down a bit.
218
00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:27,140
Look, if this relationship
has any hope of sustaining,
219
00:09:27,175 --> 00:09:29,475
You have got to be honest.
220
00:09:29,511 --> 00:09:31,878
- Okay, fine.
221
00:09:31,913 --> 00:09:33,379
[sighs]
you're right.
222
00:09:33,414 --> 00:09:34,547
I hear you.
223
00:09:34,582 --> 00:09:38,784
[cell phone ringing]
224
00:09:38,820 --> 00:09:40,052
Yeah.
225
00:09:40,088 --> 00:09:42,255
[stammering]
226
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:44,323
Hi, sweetie.
227
00:09:44,359 --> 00:09:45,925
No, i'm at the dentist.
228
00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:48,261
I lost a crown.
229
00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:50,530
It's all good.
Be back soon.
230
00:09:50,565 --> 00:09:52,398
[whimpers]
i got to go.
231
00:09:59,007 --> 00:10:00,673
- You know, i'm a writer too.
232
00:10:00,708 --> 00:10:03,509
- Oh, no. No, i did not.
233
00:10:03,545 --> 00:10:05,411
- I'm working on a screenplay.
234
00:10:05,446 --> 00:10:06,679
- Ah.
235
00:10:06,714 --> 00:10:08,314
Oh, good for you.
236
00:10:11,419 --> 00:10:12,485
- It's about this girl.
237
00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:13,986
- Oh, okay.
238
00:10:14,022 --> 00:10:15,621
- Nobody ever notices her.
239
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:18,291
No one ever asks about her life
or how she's doing.
240
00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:21,027
It's--it's like
she's not a person too.
241
00:10:21,062 --> 00:10:22,628
No one cares.
- Aw.
242
00:10:22,664 --> 00:10:26,465
- So she decides to kill
her coworkers.
243
00:10:28,603 --> 00:10:30,836
- Ah.
Did not see that coming.
244
00:10:30,872 --> 00:10:32,405
There's your twist.
245
00:10:32,440 --> 00:10:37,043
- She just feels like,
"you don't notice me?
246
00:10:37,078 --> 00:10:38,344
You'll notice me."
247
00:10:38,379 --> 00:10:40,846
- And there's your motivation.
248
00:10:40,882 --> 00:10:42,815
Good, you'll need that.
249
00:10:42,850 --> 00:10:47,019
So...
She kills them...
250
00:10:47,055 --> 00:10:49,155
- By poisoning them.
251
00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:51,257
- I see.
252
00:10:51,292 --> 00:10:54,060
- She does it slowly,
little by little,
253
00:10:54,095 --> 00:10:56,796
And no one suspects
because she's just this girl.
254
00:10:56,831 --> 00:10:59,332
Who is she?
She's nobody.
255
00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:00,433
No one would think.
256
00:11:00,468 --> 00:11:02,301
- Of course not.
Perfect crime.
257
00:11:02,337 --> 00:11:03,903
- Can i show it to you
when i'm done?
258
00:11:03,938 --> 00:11:06,339
- Absolutely.
Yes, i'm very interested.
259
00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:09,041
[chuckling]
260
00:11:15,116 --> 00:11:16,182
Where did you get that?
261
00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:17,950
- Over there.
262
00:11:17,986 --> 00:11:19,885
What are you doing?
- Nothing.
263
00:11:21,756 --> 00:11:24,624
- Fucking brilliant.
264
00:11:24,659 --> 00:11:25,925
- You read it?
265
00:11:25,960 --> 00:11:27,960
- Like i had a choice.
- Interesting.
266
00:11:27,996 --> 00:11:32,832
- Oh, well,
i might have mentioned once or--
267
00:11:32,867 --> 00:11:34,500
Stop looking at me.
268
00:11:34,535 --> 00:11:36,602
- It is so good.
- Really?
269
00:11:36,638 --> 00:11:38,170
- Oh, my god.
I laughed my ass off.
270
00:11:38,206 --> 00:11:39,805
Now i see why
everybody's flipping out.
271
00:11:39,841 --> 00:11:41,274
- Thank you.
- My goodness.
272
00:11:41,309 --> 00:11:42,975
- So have you started casting?
273
00:11:43,011 --> 00:11:44,410
Can i put in a good word
for someone?
274
00:11:44,445 --> 00:11:45,544
- Absolutely. Who?
275
00:11:45,580 --> 00:11:46,879
- Me.
276
00:11:49,217 --> 00:11:50,383
- I'm sorry?
- Say what?
277
00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:53,753
- I would love to do this.
278
00:11:56,457 --> 00:11:58,724
- Great.
279
00:11:59,594 --> 00:12:01,727
- Yes, great.
280
00:12:01,763 --> 00:12:05,564
What, um--
what part were you thinking?
281
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:07,099
- Well, got to be anderson.
282
00:12:07,135 --> 00:12:09,035
It's like you wrote it for me.
283
00:12:09,070 --> 00:12:11,871
- Not really.
[chuckling]
284
00:12:11,906 --> 00:12:15,374
Y-you should know
that the actor playing anderson
285
00:12:15,410 --> 00:12:19,478
Also has to play riggs,
so that's maybe more than you--
286
00:12:19,514 --> 00:12:21,314
- Holy shit, i love riggs.
- Oh.
287
00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:23,215
- That's my second favorite.
288
00:12:23,251 --> 00:12:25,785
So i'm anderson and riggs?
289
00:12:25,820 --> 00:12:28,688
- Apparently so.
- Wow.
290
00:12:28,723 --> 00:12:31,190
I got to tell you,
i was so scared
291
00:12:31,225 --> 00:12:34,093
I'd get stuck taking
some shit show for the check,
292
00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:35,761
But this?
293
00:12:35,797 --> 00:12:37,963
And with you guys?
294
00:12:37,999 --> 00:12:40,666
I--i don't know what to say.
295
00:12:40,702 --> 00:12:43,436
- I think we're all at a loss.
[both chuckle]
296
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,671
- All right.
I got to call my agent.
297
00:12:45,707 --> 00:12:47,473
Let's get this thing going.
Whoo-hoo!
298
00:12:47,508 --> 00:12:49,275
- Whoo-hoo.
299
00:12:52,680 --> 00:12:54,280
Why did you say "great"?
300
00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:56,782
- Well, you said "great."
- only because you said it.
301
00:12:56,818 --> 00:12:59,118
If i don't say "great"
after you say "great,"
302
00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:00,720
Suddenly i'm the bad guy.
303
00:13:00,755 --> 00:13:03,356
And may i just point out--
not in a judgmental way--
304
00:13:03,391 --> 00:13:04,890
None of this would have happened
305
00:13:04,926 --> 00:13:07,126
If you hadn't forced him
to read the bloody thing.
306
00:13:07,161 --> 00:13:08,894
This is all of your making.
307
00:13:08,930 --> 00:13:10,229
- We don't want him in it,
do we?
308
00:13:10,264 --> 00:13:12,031
- You're really asking me that?
No.
309
00:13:12,066 --> 00:13:13,399
Do you?
- No, he's dead wrong.
310
00:13:13,434 --> 00:13:15,434
But he's so excited.
- I know.
311
00:13:15,470 --> 00:13:17,303
But we have been down
the matt leblanc road.
312
00:13:17,338 --> 00:13:19,338
It is bumpy,
and it ends in a cliff.
313
00:13:19,374 --> 00:13:21,173
- So...
- I don't know.
314
00:13:21,209 --> 00:13:22,675
But we have to do something.
315
00:13:22,710 --> 00:13:24,143
This train is moving.
316
00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:25,711
- Hey, what are you guys
doing later?
317
00:13:25,747 --> 00:13:27,913
- Um...Nothing.
318
00:13:27,949 --> 00:13:29,715
- Come to the beach.
I'll throw some steaks on.
319
00:13:29,751 --> 00:13:31,250
We'll celebrate this thing.
- Great.
320
00:13:31,285 --> 00:13:33,853
- Cool.
321
00:13:33,888 --> 00:13:35,588
- Who said "great" that time?
- Yeah, i know.
322
00:13:35,623 --> 00:13:37,289
- And you notice
we didn't stop the train.
323
00:13:37,325 --> 00:13:40,860
- No.
We added a dining car.
324
00:13:42,130 --> 00:13:45,865
[keys clacking]
325
00:13:47,602 --> 00:13:49,635
- Are you a dog person?
326
00:13:49,670 --> 00:13:51,504
- Why? What did you order?
327
00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:54,039
- [laughs]
i don't know.
328
00:13:54,075 --> 00:13:58,277
I was just thinking, you know,
maybe we should get a dog.
329
00:13:58,312 --> 00:14:00,446
- Huh.
- Oh, not a fan?
330
00:14:00,481 --> 00:14:04,049
- Uh, no,
i just never had one.
331
00:14:04,085 --> 00:14:05,851
My mother was allergic.
332
00:14:05,887 --> 00:14:07,920
We had a bird, louise.
333
00:14:07,955 --> 00:14:09,789
My sister taught her to say...
334
00:14:09,824 --> 00:14:11,424
[imitating parrot]
"we're gonna crash.
335
00:14:11,459 --> 00:14:13,192
We're gonna crash."
- oh, my god.
336
00:14:13,227 --> 00:14:16,061
- Yeah.
It was pretty tense at home.
337
00:14:16,097 --> 00:14:17,430
- I'll bet.
338
00:14:17,465 --> 00:14:20,232
So dog or no dog?
339
00:14:20,268 --> 00:14:24,370
- Well, how would it work?
340
00:14:24,405 --> 00:14:26,272
Where would it live?
341
00:14:26,307 --> 00:14:27,740
- Here.
342
00:14:27,775 --> 00:14:30,276
With us.
343
00:14:30,311 --> 00:14:32,912
- Oh.
344
00:14:34,282 --> 00:14:35,381
- Hello?
345
00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:36,916
- Out here.
346
00:14:36,951 --> 00:14:39,685
- [sighs]
347
00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:41,687
So dreading this.
- Has to be done.
348
00:14:41,722 --> 00:14:43,022
- Right.
349
00:14:43,057 --> 00:14:44,924
- Smile.
Too many teeth.
350
00:14:44,959 --> 00:14:47,026
- All right.
351
00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:51,697
- I forgot
how beautiful this is.
352
00:14:51,732 --> 00:14:53,699
[laughs]
353
00:14:53,734 --> 00:14:57,436
- When were you here?
354
00:14:57,472 --> 00:15:00,105
- I'll wait.
355
00:15:00,141 --> 00:15:02,875
- Yes, we--right.
356
00:15:02,910 --> 00:15:05,411
And then you came over,
and we...
357
00:15:05,446 --> 00:15:08,581
[chuckles]
welcome back.
358
00:15:08,616 --> 00:15:09,615
How about some wine?
359
00:15:09,650 --> 00:15:10,883
- Gallons.
- Yes, please.
360
00:15:10,918 --> 00:15:12,284
- [laughs]
361
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:13,486
- All right, we got steaks.
362
00:15:13,521 --> 00:15:16,288
There's corn, potatoes.
363
00:15:16,324 --> 00:15:19,058
My mom made her famous tiramisu.
364
00:15:19,093 --> 00:15:22,027
- Your--your mother's here?
- Yeah.
365
00:15:22,063 --> 00:15:24,663
She came out last week when
she heard my father might die.
366
00:15:24,699 --> 00:15:26,932
She wanted a ringside seat.
367
00:15:26,968 --> 00:15:29,134
Ma!
368
00:15:29,170 --> 00:15:30,936
Ma!
369
00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:33,506
She hates wearing
her hearing aids.
370
00:15:33,541 --> 00:15:34,640
[shouting loudly]
ma!
371
00:15:34,675 --> 00:15:36,408
Eh, that's okay.
372
00:15:36,444 --> 00:15:39,245
She'll come out when
she smells the meat cooking.
373
00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:42,481
So here's to
the opposite of us.
374
00:15:42,517 --> 00:15:45,117
Here's hoping
it's the opposite of pucks!
375
00:15:45,152 --> 00:15:46,886
- Oh, yes.
- Oh, absolutely.
376
00:15:46,921 --> 00:15:48,521
- Yeah.
- [chuckles]
377
00:15:51,826 --> 00:15:54,460
- I'm gonna get the steaks.
I'll be right back.
378
00:15:58,132 --> 00:16:00,032
- His mother's here.
- Fuck.
379
00:16:00,067 --> 00:16:01,367
- We can't tell him
in front of her.
380
00:16:01,402 --> 00:16:03,035
- We can't not tell him.
- I know.
381
00:16:03,070 --> 00:16:06,338
- Oh, great, so now
his mother's on the train.
382
00:16:09,176 --> 00:16:11,176
- I mean,
you're here all the time anyway.
383
00:16:11,212 --> 00:16:12,811
- Mm-hmm.
- You could rent your place out.
384
00:16:12,847 --> 00:16:14,246
Make a few bucks.
- Mm-hmm.
385
00:16:14,282 --> 00:16:16,215
- It just makes sense, you know?
- Mm.
386
00:16:16,250 --> 00:16:17,283
- And i know
what you're thinking.
387
00:16:17,318 --> 00:16:18,551
- You do?
388
00:16:18,586 --> 00:16:20,019
- Everything here
is me, me, me, me.
389
00:16:20,054 --> 00:16:21,186
There's no you.
390
00:16:21,222 --> 00:16:23,722
So what i was thinking was,
391
00:16:23,758 --> 00:16:25,658
We get rid of all of my shit
392
00:16:25,693 --> 00:16:27,927
And redo the whole thing
together.
393
00:16:27,962 --> 00:16:30,095
- [laughing]
what?
394
00:16:30,131 --> 00:16:31,797
[gasps]
that's crazy.
395
00:16:31,832 --> 00:16:33,499
- No, it's not.
Not if you're gonna live here.
396
00:16:33,534 --> 00:16:35,200
Or...
- Or?
397
00:16:35,236 --> 00:16:36,769
- We buy a whole new place.
398
00:16:36,804 --> 00:16:38,003
- [laughing nervously]
399
00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:39,939
- Oh, what about the beach?
400
00:16:39,974 --> 00:16:41,974
Oh, imagine the two of us
coming home from work,
401
00:16:42,009 --> 00:16:44,109
And there's the ocean,
there's the sunset,
402
00:16:44,145 --> 00:16:45,778
And our puppy's waiting for us!
403
00:16:45,813 --> 00:16:48,047
- We're gonna crash.
[coughs]
404
00:16:48,082 --> 00:16:50,482
- What?
- Oh.
405
00:16:50,518 --> 00:16:52,484
I can't do this.
406
00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:54,453
I can't.
I'm sorry.
407
00:16:54,488 --> 00:16:57,790
It's--it's just--
it's too much.
408
00:16:57,825 --> 00:17:01,260
- What's too much?
- All of it.
409
00:17:01,295 --> 00:17:07,232
I mean, you're the best,
most wonderful person ever.
410
00:17:07,268 --> 00:17:09,134
But don't you think
it's all happening
411
00:17:09,170 --> 00:17:11,937
Just a little too fast?
412
00:17:11,973 --> 00:17:14,340
Just a--
[squeaks]
413
00:17:14,375 --> 00:17:15,908
- Oh.
414
00:17:15,943 --> 00:17:17,343
Okay.
415
00:17:20,081 --> 00:17:23,082
- I'm sorry.
416
00:17:23,117 --> 00:17:24,350
- Oh, no.
417
00:17:24,385 --> 00:17:25,985
Don't apologize.
My fault.
418
00:17:26,020 --> 00:17:27,953
I just assumed
that you were where i was.
419
00:17:27,989 --> 00:17:32,458
- No, no, i am where you are.
420
00:17:32,493 --> 00:17:37,463
Just, uh, behind you a ways.
421
00:17:37,498 --> 00:17:40,199
Here i am.
[laughs]
422
00:17:40,234 --> 00:17:42,101
[groans]
i shouldn't have said anything.
423
00:17:42,136 --> 00:17:43,869
- No, i'm glad you did.
424
00:17:43,904 --> 00:17:47,539
I'd be stuck out at the fucking
beach with some stupid dog.
425
00:17:47,575 --> 00:17:50,042
- Uh, i think it's just--
426
00:17:50,077 --> 00:17:53,112
This whole thing
is very new for me.
427
00:17:53,147 --> 00:17:55,581
I mean,
every other guy i've been with--
428
00:17:55,616 --> 00:17:58,651
I'm not saying you're a guy.
429
00:17:58,686 --> 00:17:59,752
- Mm, thanks.
430
00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:01,353
- It's just--it's--
431
00:18:01,389 --> 00:18:04,590
It's so different
than anything i've ever--
432
00:18:04,625 --> 00:18:07,259
And i don't mean that way.
433
00:18:07,294 --> 00:18:10,229
Believe me,
i'm loving all that stuff.
434
00:18:10,264 --> 00:18:12,364
Oh, no, wait.
435
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:17,136
Look, you know i have only
gone out with assholes.
436
00:18:17,171 --> 00:18:20,239
You were married to one of them.
437
00:18:20,274 --> 00:18:23,475
I'm not used to nice.
438
00:18:23,511 --> 00:18:27,646
I think i'm just scared
439
00:18:27,682 --> 00:18:32,117
By how much i care about you.
440
00:18:32,153 --> 00:18:36,955
- Well, i certainly
didn't mean to scare you.
441
00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:39,391
- I know.
[chuckles]
442
00:18:39,427 --> 00:18:41,927
And i'm sorry i got a little...
[babbles]
443
00:18:41,962 --> 00:18:43,762
[both laugh]
444
00:18:43,798 --> 00:18:45,764
- Come here, scrunch.
Both: Oh.
445
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:48,434
- [laughs]
- mm.
446
00:18:48,469 --> 00:18:51,737
- Oh, i wasn't even gonna
say anything.
447
00:18:51,772 --> 00:18:53,639
But then beverly said--
448
00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:55,074
- Beverly?
449
00:18:55,109 --> 00:19:00,679
Oh, beverly's giving you advice
about us?
450
00:19:00,715 --> 00:19:02,981
- Maybe.
451
00:19:03,017 --> 00:19:05,017
Why?
452
00:19:05,052 --> 00:19:07,252
- Well, i mean,
i know she's your friend,
453
00:19:07,288 --> 00:19:10,856
But i'm not sure she has
our best interests at heart.
454
00:19:10,891 --> 00:19:12,124
- No?
455
00:19:12,159 --> 00:19:13,826
- Well, for one,
456
00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:15,561
She's clearly in love with you.
457
00:19:15,596 --> 00:19:18,464
- [laughing]
b-beverly?
458
00:19:18,499 --> 00:19:20,165
Oh, that's crazy.
459
00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:22,468
She doesn't even like me
most of the time.
460
00:19:22,503 --> 00:19:23,969
- Oh, okay.
461
00:19:24,004 --> 00:19:28,140
- No, she's not into--
she's married.
462
00:19:28,175 --> 00:19:29,808
- I was married.
463
00:19:29,844 --> 00:19:32,111
- Even so, i don't think--
464
00:19:32,146 --> 00:19:34,213
- Oh, please.
Look at her hair.
465
00:19:36,217 --> 00:19:39,852
[keys clacking]
466
00:19:39,887 --> 00:19:41,353
- So what do you think of this?
467
00:19:41,388 --> 00:19:45,557
When i'm riggs,
i've got, like, a beard,
468
00:19:45,593 --> 00:19:48,227
But when i'm anderson,
maybe,
469
00:19:48,262 --> 00:19:51,330
Like, a weird wig
or even a bald cap or--
470
00:19:51,365 --> 00:19:54,833
Is that too much?
471
00:19:54,869 --> 00:19:56,835
- I'll tell you
what's too much--this steak.
472
00:19:56,871 --> 00:19:59,605
Oh, my god,
you're, like, a steak savant.
473
00:19:59,640 --> 00:20:01,306
[both chuckle]
474
00:20:01,342 --> 00:20:03,242
- Not a lot to it,
just meat and fire.
475
00:20:03,277 --> 00:20:04,510
[chuckles]
476
00:20:04,545 --> 00:20:07,079
So what do you think?
Bald cap or--
477
00:20:07,114 --> 00:20:08,380
- It's a little too soon to--
478
00:20:08,415 --> 00:20:10,082
- No, i know, it's just--
479
00:20:10,117 --> 00:20:11,250
I can't stop thinking about it.
480
00:20:11,285 --> 00:20:13,519
- Oh, believe me,
neither can we.
481
00:20:13,554 --> 00:20:15,854
- So you guys still thinking
about susan sarandon?
482
00:20:15,890 --> 00:20:18,557
'cause i got to say,
i could totally see that now.
483
00:20:18,592 --> 00:20:19,558
- [sighs]
484
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:21,093
You know...
[chuckles]
485
00:20:21,128 --> 00:20:23,962
We don't need to
bore your mother with work talk.
486
00:20:23,998 --> 00:20:26,799
- She can't hear anything.
487
00:20:26,834 --> 00:20:31,136
Ma, look out, koreans!
488
00:20:31,172 --> 00:20:32,871
Believe me,
if she could hear...
489
00:20:32,907 --> 00:20:34,606
[all chuckle]
490
00:20:34,642 --> 00:20:36,708
So susan sarandon?
491
00:20:36,744 --> 00:20:38,644
- Where?
492
00:20:38,679 --> 00:20:41,013
- That she heard.
493
00:20:41,048 --> 00:20:44,316
- Well...
[clears throat]
494
00:20:44,351 --> 00:20:46,285
Here's the thing.
495
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:49,755
[sighs]
496
00:20:49,790 --> 00:20:54,626
The network is adamant
about not going with "names."
497
00:20:54,662 --> 00:20:56,495
- Oh.
498
00:20:56,530 --> 00:20:59,164
Sorry, susan.
[chuckles]
499
00:20:59,200 --> 00:21:01,099
So what then,
just me and an ensemble?
500
00:21:01,135 --> 00:21:07,973
- I'm afraid they are dead set
against any names at all.
501
00:21:09,210 --> 00:21:10,309
- Wait, even me?
502
00:21:10,344 --> 00:21:12,110
- Across the board.
503
00:21:12,146 --> 00:21:14,112
- Even me?
504
00:21:14,148 --> 00:21:18,116
- We think it's a huge mistake,
but what can you do?
505
00:21:18,152 --> 00:21:19,218
- Fight it.
506
00:21:19,253 --> 00:21:20,686
That's what you can do.
507
00:21:20,721 --> 00:21:22,087
It's your show.
508
00:21:22,122 --> 00:21:23,956
You should have a say
in who's in it.
509
00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:25,457
Don't just roll over.
510
00:21:25,492 --> 00:21:27,025
That's how you got screwed
the last time.
511
00:21:27,061 --> 00:21:29,127
- Mm.
- Oh, believe me.
512
00:21:29,163 --> 00:21:31,997
We did not just roll over.
513
00:21:32,032 --> 00:21:34,633
We fought very hard for you.
514
00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:36,602
- Very, very hard.
515
00:21:36,637 --> 00:21:39,872
- Who's dead?
516
00:21:39,907 --> 00:21:41,907
- So who's this coming from?
517
00:21:41,942 --> 00:21:43,675
What's her name?
The new merc?
518
00:21:43,711 --> 00:21:45,577
- Helen, yeah.
- Mm.
519
00:21:45,613 --> 00:21:48,347
- What if i sat down with her?
Is she cute?
520
00:21:48,382 --> 00:21:50,082
Maybe there's a card
to play there.
521
00:21:50,117 --> 00:21:53,318
- Trust me, you are never
gonna crack that deck,
522
00:21:53,354 --> 00:21:54,653
Not even to shuffle.
523
00:21:54,688 --> 00:21:56,655
- No?
- Many queens.
524
00:21:56,690 --> 00:21:59,758
Not so much
with the kings and jacks.
525
00:21:59,793 --> 00:22:02,227
- Got it.
All right, forget that.
526
00:22:02,263 --> 00:22:03,228
Let's just call her.
527
00:22:03,264 --> 00:22:04,930
- Uh, what? What?
528
00:22:04,965 --> 00:22:07,165
- Yeah, maybe the three of us
can turn her around.
529
00:22:07,201 --> 00:22:09,134
- Oh, i'm sure
she's already left the office.
530
00:22:09,169 --> 00:22:10,836
- So we'll just call her
at home.
531
00:22:10,871 --> 00:22:13,138
- What?
Easy, pinot noir.
532
00:22:13,173 --> 00:22:16,008
You can't just call her at home.
- Why not?
533
00:22:16,043 --> 00:22:20,412
I'm sure my agent's got
her number.
534
00:22:20,447 --> 00:22:21,947
You know,
these guys actually like it
535
00:22:21,982 --> 00:22:23,315
When you treat them like people.
536
00:22:23,350 --> 00:22:25,817
- But they're not.
I agree with sean.
537
00:22:25,853 --> 00:22:28,854
It would be a big mistake
to bother--
538
00:22:28,889 --> 00:22:30,022
- Hey, it's matt.
539
00:22:30,057 --> 00:22:32,958
Do you have helen...
- Basch.
540
00:22:32,993 --> 00:22:35,727
- Basch's home phone?
I'm here with sean and beverly.
541
00:22:35,763 --> 00:22:39,431
She told them she doesn't
want me in their show.
542
00:22:39,466 --> 00:22:41,433
Really?
543
00:22:41,468 --> 00:22:43,635
Hang on.
544
00:22:43,671 --> 00:22:45,170
He's saying he spoke to her
just to see
545
00:22:45,205 --> 00:22:46,838
What kind of money
they're thinking,
546
00:22:46,874 --> 00:22:50,108
And she didn't even know
you'd offered it to me.
547
00:22:50,144 --> 00:22:53,445
- Well, maybe...
- [exhales]
548
00:22:55,249 --> 00:23:00,419
- He spoke to her
before she spoke with us.
549
00:23:00,454 --> 00:23:02,054
- You hear that?
550
00:23:05,159 --> 00:23:06,959
He's saying he talked to her,
like, an hour ago.
551
00:23:06,994 --> 00:23:08,593
You were here an hour ago.
- Well...
552
00:23:08,629 --> 00:23:10,529
- There must be
some logical explanation.
553
00:23:10,564 --> 00:23:12,064
- I don't know
what she could be thinking.
554
00:23:12,099 --> 00:23:13,532
It could be some kind...
555
00:23:13,567 --> 00:23:15,434
- We can get into it
with her
556
00:23:15,469 --> 00:23:16,535
In the morning.
- Of sinister network ploy.
557
00:23:16,570 --> 00:23:18,070
- Y-yeah.
558
00:23:21,608 --> 00:23:24,209
- I'll call you back.
559
00:23:24,244 --> 00:23:25,444
[phone beeps]
560
00:23:28,315 --> 00:23:30,615
Did you talk to her or not?
561
00:23:42,763 --> 00:23:44,096
Huh.
562
00:23:44,131 --> 00:23:45,764
- This is too rare for me.
563
00:23:45,799 --> 00:23:49,835
It looks like
it was in a car accident.
564
00:23:49,870 --> 00:23:51,470
I think she's got mine.
565
00:23:51,505 --> 00:23:53,271
- Oh, my god.
566
00:23:53,307 --> 00:23:54,506
Please, here, take it.
567
00:23:54,541 --> 00:23:56,408
[clears throat]
568
00:23:56,443 --> 00:23:57,843
- Yeah, see?
569
00:23:57,878 --> 00:23:59,144
This one is cooked.
570
00:23:59,179 --> 00:24:02,080
- Yes, it is.
571
00:24:06,987 --> 00:24:09,955
- Do you want me in your show?
572
00:24:09,990 --> 00:24:12,491
- We know she'll never go
for it.
573
00:24:12,526 --> 00:24:14,926
- That's not what i asked.
574
00:24:14,962 --> 00:24:17,996
Do you...
575
00:24:18,032 --> 00:24:20,632
Want me in your show?
576
00:24:31,345 --> 00:24:34,646
Then why'd you make me
read the fucking thing?
577
00:24:36,550 --> 00:24:38,683
- Clearly i should not have.
578
00:24:44,358 --> 00:24:46,558
- We're both so sorry.
579
00:24:46,593 --> 00:24:50,762
- [hacking]
580
00:24:50,798 --> 00:24:53,231
[spits]
581
00:24:54,902 --> 00:24:56,835
Gristle.
582
00:24:56,870 --> 00:24:59,037
- Yes, it is.
583
00:25:05,846 --> 00:25:07,746
- Perhaps it would be best
if we left.
584
00:25:07,781 --> 00:25:09,014
[clears throat]
585
00:25:09,049 --> 00:25:09,981
- Where are they going?
586
00:25:10,017 --> 00:25:11,483
Where are you going?
587
00:25:11,518 --> 00:25:14,719
- Um, i'm afraid we have to run,
mrs. Leblanc.
588
00:25:14,755 --> 00:25:17,155
- What?
- We have to leave now.
589
00:25:17,191 --> 00:25:18,757
- It was so lovely--
590
00:25:18,792 --> 00:25:21,760
- Wait, wait.
591
00:25:36,110 --> 00:25:38,777
- If you could just tell
your mother good night for us.
592
00:25:38,812 --> 00:25:40,245
- Tiramisu.
593
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:42,013
- Oh, no, that's very kind,
594
00:25:42,049 --> 00:25:43,381
But i'm afraid
we really have to--
595
00:25:43,417 --> 00:25:44,616
- I made it.
596
00:25:44,651 --> 00:25:46,118
- No, no, i-i know you did,
but--
597
00:25:46,153 --> 00:25:47,619
- It looks delicious,
but we really must--
598
00:25:47,654 --> 00:25:49,054
- Enjoy.
599
00:26:03,270 --> 00:26:04,269
- Mmm, it's brilliant.
600
00:26:04,304 --> 00:26:07,439
- Mmm, this is such a treat.
601
00:26:15,749 --> 00:26:20,418
- We will remember this forever.
- Mm.
602
00:26:27,561 --> 00:26:30,028
Well, that was glorious.
- More?
603
00:26:30,063 --> 00:26:31,429
- No. No, thank you.
- No, no. No, no.
604
00:26:31,465 --> 00:26:32,631
Um...
[clears throat]
605
00:26:32,666 --> 00:26:35,100
All right then, so, uh...
606
00:26:35,135 --> 00:26:37,435
We--we're off.
607
00:26:39,673 --> 00:26:41,006
Um...
608
00:26:41,041 --> 00:26:45,510
Again,
we could not regret this more.
609
00:26:51,385 --> 00:26:52,350
- We'll see you tomorrow.
610
00:26:52,386 --> 00:26:54,085
- So sorry.
611
00:26:59,726 --> 00:27:03,028
- Very sorry.
- So poorly handled.
612
00:27:07,501 --> 00:27:09,000
- Thank you for having us.
613
00:27:13,307 --> 00:27:15,140
We must do this again.
- What is wrong with you?
614
00:27:15,175 --> 00:27:16,508
- I don't know.
615
00:27:17,305 --> 00:27:23,730
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