1 00:00:02,233 --> 00:00:04,100 - HEY, MA. - HELLO, DEAR. 2 00:00:04,100 --> 00:00:06,133 - WHATCHA DOIN' THERE? 3 00:00:06,133 --> 00:00:07,367 - OH, THIS? 4 00:00:07,367 --> 00:00:10,300 THIS IS CALLED "POLISHING SILVER." 5 00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:14,533 - YEAH, I KNOW THAT. 6 00:00:14,533 --> 00:00:16,467 IT'S JUST THAT WE DON'T OFTEN SEE YOUR SILVER. 7 00:00:16,467 --> 00:00:19,100 - PLEASE, STOP HINTING, DEBRA. 8 00:00:19,100 --> 00:00:20,667 THE SILVER'S GOING TO ROBBIE. 9 00:00:20,667 --> 00:00:23,900 IT'S ALREADY IN THE WILL. - OKAY. 10 00:00:23,900 --> 00:00:26,267 - WHAT'S THIS, FOR LEE AND STAN'S ANNIVERSARY PARTY? 11 00:00:26,267 --> 00:00:27,833 - THEIR 45TH. 12 00:00:27,833 --> 00:00:30,833 THEY'RE OUR DEAREST FRIENDS, BUT I HAVE TO TELL YOU, 13 00:00:30,833 --> 00:00:34,367 I NEVER THOUGHT THEY'D LAST THIS LONG. 14 00:00:34,367 --> 00:00:35,667 - WHERE YOU GOIN', ROBERT? 15 00:00:35,667 --> 00:00:37,200 - WHAT'S GOIN' ON IN THERE? 16 00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:38,500 - OH, ROBBIE'S HELPING YOUR FATHER 17 00:00:38,500 --> 00:00:40,633 WRITE A FUNNY SPEECH FOR LEE AND STAN. 18 00:00:40,633 --> 00:00:42,467 - GET BACK HERE! WE'RE NOT DONE! 19 00:00:42,467 --> 00:00:44,900 - OH, WE'RE DONE, OLD MAN! 20 00:00:44,900 --> 00:00:47,133 - FINE, FINE! 21 00:00:47,133 --> 00:00:49,733 I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP ANYMORE! 22 00:00:49,733 --> 00:00:52,400 MARIE, I'M NOT DOING THE STUPID SPEECH. 23 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:55,633 - IT'S THE ONE THING YOU HAVE TO DO FOR THE PARTY! 24 00:00:55,633 --> 00:00:58,833 - WELL, NOW THE ONE THING I HAVE TO DO IS EAT SHRIMP. 25 00:00:58,833 --> 00:01:00,567 - YOU HAVE TO WRITE SOMETHING. 26 00:01:00,567 --> 00:01:02,667 THEY'RE OUR DEAREST FRIENDS. 27 00:01:02,667 --> 00:01:03,700 - TO HELL WITH THEM. 28 00:01:03,700 --> 00:01:06,100 - OH, YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE! 29 00:01:06,100 --> 00:01:07,400 WOULD YOU TALK TO HIM? 30 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:10,233 HE HAS TO WRITE SOMETHING. OTHERWISE-- 31 00:01:14,167 --> 00:01:15,933 RAYMOND... 32 00:01:15,933 --> 00:01:17,767 - MA, DON'T EVEN THINK OF IT. 33 00:01:17,767 --> 00:01:18,967 - RAYMOND... 34 00:01:18,967 --> 00:01:21,233 - BACK! BACK! BACK! 35 00:01:22,700 --> 00:01:25,300 - UH-UH-UH-UH-UH-UH. READ THE WILL. 36 00:01:29,900 --> 00:01:31,300 - YOU CAN DO IT, RAYMOND. 37 00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:33,533 YOU CAN DO LEE AND STAN'S TRIBUTE! 38 00:01:33,533 --> 00:01:36,233 - [mimicking] NO, I CAN'T! 39 00:01:36,233 --> 00:01:38,100 - THEY'LL BE SO THRILLED! 40 00:01:38,100 --> 00:01:40,133 - MA, PLEASE, I HARDLY KNOW 'EM. 41 00:01:40,133 --> 00:01:42,967 - RAYMOND, THEY'RE OUR DEAREST FRIENDS. 42 00:01:42,967 --> 00:01:44,633 - NO! NO! NO! 43 00:01:44,633 --> 00:01:47,100 - WE'RE PRACTICALLY RELATED. YOU LIVED AT THEIR HOUSE! 44 00:01:47,100 --> 00:01:48,467 - WHAT? 45 00:01:48,467 --> 00:01:50,900 - WHEN YOUR FATHER AND I WENT TO ATLANTIC CITY. 46 00:01:50,900 --> 00:01:51,967 - THAT WAS A WEEKEND. 47 00:01:51,967 --> 00:01:52,967 - IT WAS A LONG WEEKEND. 48 00:01:52,967 --> 00:01:54,500 - YOU SAID IT. 49 00:01:56,133 --> 00:01:58,500 - OH, RAYMOND, YOU'LL BE WONDERFUL. 50 00:01:58,500 --> 00:02:00,500 - MA, MA, I SPEND ALL DAY TRYING TO WRITE MY COLUMN. 51 00:02:00,500 --> 00:02:03,133 I DON'T HAVE TIME TO COME UP WITH AN ANNIVERSARY SPEECH. 52 00:02:03,133 --> 00:02:04,500 - IT'S NOT A SPEECH. 53 00:02:04,500 --> 00:02:05,833 IT WAS A SPEECH WHEN YOUR FATHER WAS DOING IT, 54 00:02:05,833 --> 00:02:07,200 'CAUSE THAT'S ALL HE COULD HANDLE. 55 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:10,267 BUT YOU... YOU CAN DO ANYTHING! 56 00:02:10,267 --> 00:02:14,767 - NOT ANYTHING. IN FACT, NOTHING. 57 00:02:14,767 --> 00:02:16,033 - MAYBE YOU COULD DO, LIKE, 58 00:02:16,033 --> 00:02:18,233 AN INTERPRETIVE DANCE OR SOMETHING. 59 00:02:18,233 --> 00:02:21,400 - YOU COULD DO A THING WHERE YOU SHUT IT! 60 00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:23,367 - HEY, LISTEN, RAY, WHATEVER YOU DO, 61 00:02:23,367 --> 00:02:24,933 TRY TO MENTION THAT MY NAME IS DEBRA. 62 00:02:24,933 --> 00:02:26,667 LEE KEEPS CALLING ME DONNA. 63 00:02:26,667 --> 00:02:28,933 - ARE YOU HELPING ME? 64 00:02:28,933 --> 00:02:30,600 - THIS HAS TO BE SPECIAL, 65 00:02:30,600 --> 00:02:33,233 'CAUSE IT'S THE EVENING'S ENTERTAINMENT. 66 00:02:33,233 --> 00:02:36,033 SO I WANT YOU TO FEEL FREE TO GET CREATIVE. 67 00:02:36,033 --> 00:02:38,267 - I'D LIKE TO FEEL FREE TO NOT DO THIS! 68 00:02:38,267 --> 00:02:39,833 I'M NOT GOOD AT THIS STUFF! 69 00:02:39,833 --> 00:02:41,133 - OH... 70 00:02:41,133 --> 00:02:45,267 YOU'RE A WITTY AND CHARMING BOY. 71 00:02:45,267 --> 00:02:47,500 WHY DON'T YOU DO A FUNNY POEM? 72 00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:50,467 - A POEM? NO! NO WAY, NO! 73 00:02:50,467 --> 00:02:53,467 - YOU DON'T WANT TO DISAPPOINT EVERYONE, RAYMOND. 74 00:02:53,467 --> 00:02:55,667 - YEAH! YOU CAN'T HELP OUT? 75 00:03:01,667 --> 00:03:04,167 - OH... 76 00:03:04,167 --> 00:03:08,600 YOUR MOTHER THINKS I AM A MORON. 77 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:09,733 I AGREE TO HELP HER 78 00:03:09,733 --> 00:03:11,533 AND HEAT UP SOME THINGS FOR THE PARTY TOMORROW. 79 00:03:11,533 --> 00:03:13,400 LISTEN TO HER DIRECTIONS FOR ME: 80 00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:15,667 "DEBRA, THESE ARE MINI QUICHES," 81 00:03:15,667 --> 00:03:20,333 THEN IN PARENTHESES, "FRENCH CHEESE PIES." 82 00:03:20,333 --> 00:03:22,800 "PUT IN THE OVEN TOMORROW AT 6:00 P.M." 83 00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:25,233 "P.M." IS UNDERLINED. 84 00:03:25,233 --> 00:03:26,533 - SO WHAT? IT'S NOT THAT BAD. 85 00:03:26,533 --> 00:03:27,967 - OH, NO? LISTEN TO THIS: 86 00:03:27,967 --> 00:03:32,033 "CAUTION--OVEN GETS HOT." 87 00:03:34,567 --> 00:03:36,267 - HEY, DEB. - HEY, ROBERT. 88 00:03:36,267 --> 00:03:38,833 - WHAT'S UP, SHAKESPEARE? 89 00:03:38,833 --> 00:03:40,567 - SHUT UP! 90 00:03:40,567 --> 00:03:43,000 - HOW GOETH IT? 91 00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:44,467 - I DON'T KNOW. HERE, LOOK AT THIS. 92 00:03:46,500 --> 00:03:48,900 - "IT'S NO WONDER STAN WAS ATTRACTED TO LEE. 93 00:03:48,900 --> 00:03:52,367 HE'S AN ACCOUNTANT, SO HE APPRECIATES GOOD FIGURES." 94 00:03:55,267 --> 00:03:57,433 WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? 95 00:03:57,433 --> 00:04:00,067 THAT LEE HAS A GOOD FIGURE? 96 00:04:00,067 --> 00:04:02,867 HAVE YOU SEEN LEE? 97 00:04:02,867 --> 00:04:04,900 - STOP IT! I KNOW, ALL RIGHT? 98 00:04:04,900 --> 00:04:06,000 IT'S NOT FUNNY. 99 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:07,500 THESE PEOPLE ARE NOT FUNNY. 100 00:04:07,500 --> 00:04:10,967 THEY PLAY CARDS AND WALK AROUND THE MALL FOR EXERCISE. 101 00:04:10,967 --> 00:04:12,567 THEY'RE BORING PEOPLE. 102 00:04:12,567 --> 00:04:14,500 - YEAH, TOO BAD IT'S NOT MA AND DAD'S ANNIVERSARY. 103 00:04:14,500 --> 00:04:17,167 THEN YOU'D HAVE MATERIAL! - OH! 104 00:04:17,167 --> 00:04:19,500 YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKIN' OF THE OTHER DAY? 105 00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:23,067 REMEMBER THE TIME MOM SEWED HIS FLY SHUT? 106 00:04:24,633 --> 00:04:26,167 - WHAT? WHEN WAS THIS? 107 00:04:26,167 --> 00:04:27,600 - YEAH, WE WERE IN HIGH SCHOOL, 108 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,167 AND SHE WAS SICK OF HIM SITTIN' ON THE COUCH 109 00:04:29,167 --> 00:04:32,200 ALL OPEN AND UNZIPPED. 110 00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:33,633 - YEAH, IT DIDN'T WORK, THOUGH. 111 00:04:33,633 --> 00:04:35,200 HE'D JUST COME HOME, WHIP OFF HIS PANTS, 112 00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:38,600 AND HANG 'EM ON THE FRONT DOORKNOB. 113 00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:40,300 - THEN HE'D COME IN THE HOUSE. 114 00:04:43,300 --> 00:04:44,933 - HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? 115 00:04:44,933 --> 00:04:47,100 THAT'S WHAT YOU SHOULD DO, STUFF ABOUT YOUR PARENTS. 116 00:04:47,100 --> 00:04:48,800 - IT'S LEE AND STAN'S THING. 117 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:52,467 - I KNOW, BUT YOU COULD DO, LIKE, A MARRIAGE COMPARISON, 118 00:04:52,467 --> 00:04:54,000 YOU KNOW, WHERE LEE AND STAN 119 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:55,833 ARE A CLASSIC, SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE, 120 00:04:55,833 --> 00:04:57,567 AND YOUR PARENTS ARE... 121 00:04:57,567 --> 00:05:00,600 LESS CLASSICAL. 122 00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:01,733 - THAT'S TRUE. 123 00:05:01,733 --> 00:05:03,300 I WOULD LOVE TO BE ABLE TO BRING UP THE TIME 124 00:05:03,300 --> 00:05:06,600 THEY DROVE A CAR THROUGH THE LIVING ROOM WALL. 125 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,267 - YEAH, AS OPPOSED TO LEE AND STAN, 126 00:05:08,267 --> 00:05:10,033 WHO PREFER TO RING THE DOORBELL. 127 00:05:10,033 --> 00:05:13,300 [both laughing] 128 00:05:13,300 --> 00:05:16,000 THAT'S GOOD. - YEAH. 129 00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:17,333 - YEAH. 130 00:05:17,333 --> 00:05:19,433 OR...OR HOW 'BOUT THE TIME MY FATHER 131 00:05:19,433 --> 00:05:22,767 ACCIDENTALLY GAVE OUT CONDOMS FOR HALLOWEEN? 132 00:05:24,900 --> 00:05:27,833 - HOW 'BOUT THE TIME THAT THEY FOUGHT FOR A WEEK 133 00:05:27,833 --> 00:05:31,800 BECAUSE THEY WERE LITERALLY COMPARING APPLES AND ORANGES? 134 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:33,567 - RIGHT...RIGHT! 135 00:05:33,567 --> 00:05:35,500 I REMEMBER THAT. I HAD TO VOTE! 136 00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:36,867 - YEAH. 137 00:05:36,867 --> 00:05:38,200 THAT'S GOOD. 138 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:39,733 - HEY, THIS IS PRETTY GOOD STUFF. 139 00:05:39,733 --> 00:05:41,033 MAYBE WE SHOULD DO IT. 140 00:05:41,033 --> 00:05:42,433 YOU AND ME, WE COULD DO, LIKE, A SKIT. 141 00:05:42,433 --> 00:05:44,000 - YEAH, SURE, I'LL DO IT WITH YOU. 142 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:45,800 - WHOA, WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE. 143 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:48,167 YOU CANNOT DO THAT. 144 00:05:48,167 --> 00:05:49,467 - WHAT? YEAH, SURE WE CAN. 145 00:05:49,467 --> 00:05:51,400 YOU CAN BE LEE AND MY MOM, 146 00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:53,033 AND I'LL BE STAN AND MY DAD. 147 00:05:53,033 --> 00:05:54,733 - OH, THAT WOULD BE HILARIOUS. - YEAH. 148 00:05:54,733 --> 00:05:56,833 WHAT ELSE WE GOT ON 'EM, LIKE THE PANTS THING? 149 00:05:56,833 --> 00:05:58,200 - OH, NO, NO, NO. 150 00:05:58,200 --> 00:05:59,267 LOOK, WHEN I SAID THAT, I WASN'T SERIOUS. 151 00:05:59,267 --> 00:06:00,700 COUNT ME OUT. 152 00:06:00,700 --> 00:06:02,500 - ALL RIGHT, YOU'RE OUT. SO HOW SHOULD WE DO IT? 153 00:06:04,867 --> 00:06:06,500 - NOW--NOW, LOOK. LOOK. 154 00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:08,867 REALLY--LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, RAY. 155 00:06:08,867 --> 00:06:11,433 THIS STUFF IS NOT FUNNY. 156 00:06:11,433 --> 00:06:12,767 - WHAT? YOU WERE JUST LAUGHIN'. 157 00:06:12,767 --> 00:06:14,667 - YEAH, BUT THAT WAS BEHIND THEIR BACKS. 158 00:06:14,667 --> 00:06:18,133 THIS WOULD BE IN FRONT OF THEIR FACES 159 00:06:18,133 --> 00:06:19,533 WITH ALL THEIR FRIENDS WATCHING. 160 00:06:19,533 --> 00:06:21,433 - YEAH, SEE, THAT'S RIGHT, THEIR FRIENDS, 161 00:06:21,433 --> 00:06:24,133 SO EVERYBODY WOULD KNOW WE WERE JUST KIDDIN' AROUND. 162 00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:25,500 - YEAH. - NO. 163 00:06:25,500 --> 00:06:26,767 I'M TELLING YOU, YOU SHOULDN'T DO THIS. 164 00:06:26,767 --> 00:06:28,033 IT WOULD JUST HUMILIATE THEM, 165 00:06:28,033 --> 00:06:30,467 AND YOUR CHILDREN WILL BE WATCHING! 166 00:06:30,467 --> 00:06:32,067 - THE KIDS ARE GONNA BE AT A SLEEPOVER, 167 00:06:32,067 --> 00:06:34,500 AND MOM AND DAD ARE UNHUMILIATABLE. 168 00:06:36,767 --> 00:06:39,633 - I'M TELLING YOU, THIS IS VERY RISKY. 169 00:06:39,633 --> 00:06:41,200 - NO...IT'S FUNNY. 170 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:42,967 I THINK IT'S FUNNY. ISN'T IT FUNNY? 171 00:06:42,967 --> 00:06:45,733 I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY. 172 00:06:45,733 --> 00:06:47,633 - AH, MAYBE WE SHOULDN'T DO IT. 173 00:06:47,633 --> 00:06:49,233 - HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT I ALWAYS LIKE? 174 00:06:49,233 --> 00:06:50,900 A GOOD SONG PARODY. 175 00:06:50,900 --> 00:06:53,233 - A SONG PARODY? LIKE WHAT? 176 00:06:53,233 --> 00:06:54,767 - HOW 'BOUT SOMETHING LIKE... 177 00:06:54,767 --> 00:06:56,267 [singing to the tune of "Comin' Round the Mountain"] 178 00:06:56,267 --> 00:07:00,167 LEE AND STAN HAVE BEEN MARRIED 45 YEARS 179 00:07:00,167 --> 00:07:03,533 LEE AND STAN HAVE BEEN MARRIED 45 YEARS 180 00:07:03,533 --> 00:07:05,533 OH, THEY LIKE TO PLAY CANASTA 181 00:07:05,533 --> 00:07:07,433 AND TAKE WALKS AROUND THE MALLS 182 00:07:07,433 --> 00:07:13,567 AND WHY NOT? IT'S MARVELOUS EXERCISE 183 00:07:19,467 --> 00:07:21,033 - I THINK THE SKIT IS FUNNY. 184 00:07:21,033 --> 00:07:22,500 - WE'RE GONNA DO A SKIT. WE'RE GONNA DO A SKIT. 185 00:07:22,500 --> 00:07:24,667 - SO OKAY, I'LL BE YOUR MOM... 186 00:07:29,633 --> 00:07:30,767 [all laughing] 187 00:07:30,767 --> 00:07:33,033 - OKAY, WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. WAIT. - AND FINALLY... 188 00:07:33,033 --> 00:07:36,467 THIS IS HOW LEE AND STAN MIGHT VISIT SOMEONE'S HOME. 189 00:07:37,733 --> 00:07:38,933 DING-DONG! 190 00:07:38,933 --> 00:07:40,733 HELLO! THANK YOU FOR INVITING US. 191 00:07:40,733 --> 00:07:42,867 - OH, STAN, ISN'T THIS A LOVELY HOUSE? 192 00:07:42,867 --> 00:07:45,600 - IT CERTAINLY IS, AND YOU ARE LOVELY TOO, LEE. 193 00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:48,700 - OH, THANK YOU, STAN. I LOVE YOU. 194 00:07:48,700 --> 00:07:51,567 - AND I LOVE YOU, LEE. 195 00:07:53,100 --> 00:07:54,500 NOW... 196 00:07:54,500 --> 00:07:56,200 LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT HOW FRANK AND MARIE 197 00:07:56,200 --> 00:07:59,533 MIGHT VISIT SOMEONE'S HOME, SHALL WE? 198 00:08:01,967 --> 00:08:03,800 - DO YOU THINK RAYMOND IS HOME? 199 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:04,800 - LET'S FIND OUT. 200 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:06,700 both: BA-BOOM! 201 00:08:10,133 --> 00:08:11,933 - HELLO, DEARS. 202 00:08:11,933 --> 00:08:14,033 - MAKE ME SOMETHIN' TO EAT! 203 00:08:14,033 --> 00:08:15,367 - DON'T MIND ME. 204 00:08:15,367 --> 00:08:17,900 I'LL JUST BE GOING THROUGH YOUR MAIL. 205 00:08:17,900 --> 00:08:20,533 - AND I'LL JUST BE WATCHING YOUR TELEVISION. 206 00:08:33,067 --> 00:08:35,867 - OH, FRANK, ZIP UP YOUR PANTS! 207 00:08:35,867 --> 00:08:38,567 - ZIP UP YOUR MOUTH! 208 00:08:38,567 --> 00:08:41,500 - OH, MY GOD, LOOK WHAT THEY LEAVE LYING AROUND, 209 00:08:41,500 --> 00:08:44,200 THE "SPORTS ILLUSTRATED" SWIMSUIT ISSUE. 210 00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:48,067 - HOLY CRAP! GIVE ME THAT! 211 00:08:48,067 --> 00:08:50,867 - FRANK, YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT WHAT REAL WOMEN LOOK LIKE. 212 00:08:50,867 --> 00:08:53,533 - NO KIDDING. 213 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:55,967 - AND JUST WHAT MAGAZINE ARE YOU IN, FRANK, 214 00:08:55,967 --> 00:08:58,200 "BALD AND GASSY"? 215 00:08:59,267 --> 00:09:00,500 - HEY, MY PROBLEM IS, 216 00:09:00,500 --> 00:09:03,600 I GOT A LIFETIME SUBSCRIPTION TO YOU! 217 00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,133 - AND I CAN CANCEL IT AT ANY TIME! 218 00:09:06,133 --> 00:09:07,833 - MAKE ME SOMETHIN' TO EAT! 219 00:09:07,833 --> 00:09:09,467 - MAKE IT YOURSELF! 220 00:09:09,467 --> 00:09:13,133 - IF I COULD MAKE IT MYSELF, YOU'D BE OUT ON THE CURB! 221 00:09:13,133 --> 00:09:15,233 - YOU'D LOVE THAT, WOULDN'T YOU? 222 00:09:15,233 --> 00:09:16,500 - I THINK WE'D BOTH LOVE IT. 223 00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:18,333 AND YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE WE BOTH LOVE? 224 00:09:18,333 --> 00:09:21,733 both: LEE AND STAN! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! 225 00:09:21,733 --> 00:09:24,767 - OH, THAT'S GREAT. 226 00:09:24,767 --> 00:09:27,067 THAT WAS SO FUNNY. 227 00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:28,933 THANK YOU SO MUCH! 228 00:09:28,933 --> 00:09:30,800 I WAS CRYING, LAUGHING. 229 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:32,433 HAVE YOU EVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THAT? 230 00:09:32,433 --> 00:09:34,600 - IT'S BETTER THAN BROADWAY. 231 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:37,633 - I DIDN'T LIKE IT. TOO MUCH LEE AND STAN. 232 00:09:37,633 --> 00:09:39,000 [laughter] 233 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,433 - THAT WAS WONDERFUL! 234 00:09:40,433 --> 00:09:43,200 I LIKED WHEN YOU CALLED HIM "BALD AND GASSY." 235 00:09:44,433 --> 00:09:48,700 - I KNEW HIM WHEN HE WAS JUST GASSY. 236 00:09:48,700 --> 00:09:50,533 - LOOK WHO'S TALKING! 237 00:09:50,533 --> 00:09:53,400 - I SAID TO FRANK, "THAT'S YOU TO A 'T'!" 238 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:55,067 - YOU HAD THIS ONE DOWN PERFECTLY. 239 00:09:55,067 --> 00:09:56,700 I WAS PETRIFIED! 240 00:09:56,700 --> 00:09:59,900 - WELL, WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD ENJOY IT. 241 00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:02,867 - BETTER THAN BROADWAY. 242 00:10:02,867 --> 00:10:04,767 - THANK YOU. - THANKS. 243 00:10:04,767 --> 00:10:06,433 - ALL RIGHT. - LET'S GET A DRINK. 244 00:10:06,433 --> 00:10:08,400 - ALL RIGHT. NOW WE CAN ENJOY OURSELVES. 245 00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:10,167 - WELL, RAYMOND, IT'S OFFICIAL: 246 00:10:10,167 --> 00:10:13,767 THEY LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO. 247 00:10:13,767 --> 00:10:15,367 - NO MATTER WHAT I DO? 248 00:10:15,367 --> 00:10:18,900 YOU MEAN LIKE PROVIDE CROWD-PLEASING ENTERTAINMENT? 249 00:10:18,900 --> 00:10:22,267 - IT JUST SHOULD BE NOTED THAT EVERYBODY WAS DRUNK. 250 00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:26,100 - DRUNK WITH LAUGHTER. 251 00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:27,333 - OH, MY, MY, MY. 252 00:10:27,333 --> 00:10:28,900 YOU KNOW, I EXPECT THAT FROM RAYMOND 253 00:10:28,900 --> 00:10:30,333 BUT NOT FROM YOU, DEBRA. 254 00:10:30,333 --> 00:10:32,067 I'M VERY DISAPPOINTED. 255 00:10:32,067 --> 00:10:35,567 - [singing] NO ONE'S GOING TO LISTEN TO ROBERT ANYMORE 256 00:10:35,567 --> 00:10:38,567 NO ONE'S GOING TO LISTEN TO ROBERT ANYMORE 257 00:10:38,567 --> 00:10:39,767 - ALL RIGHT! 258 00:10:39,767 --> 00:10:41,567 - [singing] YOU WERE WRONG AND WE WERE FUNNY 259 00:10:41,567 --> 00:10:45,367 AND YOU CAN'T STAND IT, HONEY 260 00:10:45,367 --> 00:10:47,933 DID I MENTION THAT YOU'RE DUE BACK AT THE ZOO? 261 00:10:47,933 --> 00:10:50,733 [both laughing] 262 00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:53,967 - OH, WE SHOULD HAVE DONE THE SONG. 263 00:10:53,967 --> 00:10:56,033 [laughs] 264 00:10:56,033 --> 00:10:57,500 - WE COULD HAVE DONE THE SONG. 265 00:10:57,500 --> 00:10:59,133 COULDN'T HAVE BEEN THAT SONG. 266 00:10:59,133 --> 00:11:00,267 - GOOD-BYE, MAX. 267 00:11:00,267 --> 00:11:02,500 - THANK YOU, DEAR. VERY NICE. 268 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,367 - THANKS FOR COMING, GARVIN. 269 00:11:05,367 --> 00:11:08,800 - GREAT PARTY! FIRST-CLASS ENTERTAINMENT. 270 00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:11,500 HEY, RAY, DEBRA... [laughs] 271 00:11:11,500 --> 00:11:13,200 - HEY, THANK YOU, GARVIN. THANK YOU. 272 00:11:13,200 --> 00:11:16,600 - HEY, ROBERT, I WANT TO SEE YOU IN THERE NEXT TIME. 273 00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:19,600 YOU COULD BE, LIKE, A-- A BIG INDIAN 274 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:24,800 OR A--OR A--A BIG, FUNNY, GALUMPH-Y WAITER. 275 00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:27,067 [laughs] 276 00:11:27,067 --> 00:11:29,567 BYE! all: BYE. 277 00:11:34,267 --> 00:11:35,967 - NEVER LIKED THAT GUY. 278 00:11:35,967 --> 00:11:39,267 - MARIE, THIS WAS TERRIFIC. 279 00:11:39,267 --> 00:11:41,633 - ABSOLUTELY. GARVIN WAS RIGHT. 280 00:11:41,633 --> 00:11:44,300 YOUR SHOW WAS TOP-NOTCH. 281 00:11:44,300 --> 00:11:45,600 - THANKS. THANK YOU. 282 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:47,800 - JUST REMEMBER WHO GOT RAYMOND TO DO IT. 283 00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:50,067 - WELL, COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT DEBRA. 284 00:11:50,067 --> 00:11:52,033 - WELL, WE HAD GREAT INSPIRATION. 285 00:11:52,033 --> 00:11:55,233 - SHE'S RIGHT. WITHOUT US, NO SHOW. 286 00:11:55,233 --> 00:11:56,233 - THAT'S TRUE. 287 00:11:56,233 --> 00:11:58,300 - YOU TWO WERE SO GOOD. 288 00:11:58,300 --> 00:12:00,200 - YOU KNOW, YOU AND FRANK BETTER GET READY, 289 00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:01,933 BECAUSE YOU MIGHT HAVE TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT 290 00:12:01,933 --> 00:12:03,033 FOR THEIR ANNIVERSARY. 291 00:12:03,033 --> 00:12:06,100 - OH, THAT, I'D LOVE TO SEE. 292 00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:07,600 - WE WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. 293 00:12:07,600 --> 00:12:10,067 - ARE YOU KIDDIN'? IT'D BE A PIECE OF CAKE! 294 00:12:10,067 --> 00:12:12,333 - OH, YEAH? - GIVE US A LITTLE, FRANK. 295 00:12:12,333 --> 00:12:15,233 - NO, NO, NO. YOU TWO JUST DO US SOME MORE. 296 00:12:15,233 --> 00:12:16,633 - NO, NO. GO AHEAD. 297 00:12:16,633 --> 00:12:19,133 - [imitating Ray] "NO, NO. GO AHEAD." 298 00:12:19,133 --> 00:12:22,400 - THAT'S HIM! WITH THE NASAL VOICE. 299 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:24,467 - YEAH, NASAL VOICE, ALL RIGHT. 300 00:12:24,467 --> 00:12:26,000 - [whining] OH, I HURT MY PINKIE 301 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:29,700 WHEN I WAS TYPING! 302 00:12:29,700 --> 00:12:33,000 THE KEYS WERE SO HARD! 303 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:35,867 I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE! 304 00:12:35,867 --> 00:12:37,433 - [laughs] 305 00:12:37,433 --> 00:12:38,833 - [imitating Debra] OH, STOP, RAY. 306 00:12:38,833 --> 00:12:41,467 I'M TRYING TO HEAT UP SOUP FROM A CAN... 307 00:12:47,233 --> 00:12:50,733 AND IT'S VERY TRICKY. 308 00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:56,200 - THAT'S YOU, DONNA! 309 00:12:56,200 --> 00:13:00,400 - [laughs] IT'S DEBRA. 310 00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:04,800 - WHO CARES? PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ME! 311 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:07,700 I'M A NEEDY, WHINY BABY! 312 00:13:07,700 --> 00:13:09,033 MY PINKIE! 313 00:13:09,033 --> 00:13:11,767 OH! 314 00:13:11,767 --> 00:13:14,067 - STOP! STOP! 315 00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:24,933 - RAY, YOU NEVER HELP ME WITH ANYTHING AROUND HERE. 316 00:13:24,933 --> 00:13:27,300 IDIOT. 317 00:13:28,733 --> 00:13:29,967 - YOU'RE SO MEAN TO ME! 318 00:13:29,967 --> 00:13:32,500 I WANT MY MOMMY! 319 00:13:38,033 --> 00:13:41,633 - [laughing] 320 00:13:41,633 --> 00:13:44,600 - THEN GO OVER THERE, BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY 321 00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:47,067 TO BE NICE TO YOU. 322 00:13:48,700 --> 00:13:49,867 - THAT'S PERFECT, 323 00:13:49,867 --> 00:13:52,500 'CAUSE SHE'S SO MEAN TO HIM, ALWAYS! 324 00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:55,700 - AND HE'S SUCH A BABY! 325 00:13:55,700 --> 00:13:56,700 - I AM NOT! 326 00:13:56,700 --> 00:13:59,500 - SEE? [laughs] 327 00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:03,200 - STOP! MY STOMACH! YOU'RE KILLING ME! 328 00:14:05,533 --> 00:14:06,933 - MORE! [laughs] 329 00:14:06,933 --> 00:14:08,567 DO SOME MORE! 330 00:14:08,567 --> 00:14:10,400 - YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT? IT'S GETTIN' KIND OF LATE. 331 00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:13,033 - YEAH, YEAH, IT IS. IT REALLY IS. 332 00:14:13,033 --> 00:14:15,567 - HEY, HEY, DAD, DO HOW HE HAS NO ASS! 333 00:14:25,133 --> 00:14:27,000 - I'M SORRY, BUT THAT IS MESSED UP! 334 00:14:28,167 --> 00:14:30,433 I MEAN, THAT IS JUST NOT FUNNY! 335 00:14:30,433 --> 00:14:31,967 - WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT? 336 00:14:31,967 --> 00:14:33,600 - WHY? BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO CLASS. 337 00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:35,000 NO CLASS! 338 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:38,900 - RAYMOND, YOU LEFT WITHOUT SAYING GOOD-BYE TO LEE AND STAN. 339 00:14:38,900 --> 00:14:40,233 THAT WAS RUDE. 340 00:14:40,233 --> 00:14:41,867 - YEAH, WHERE ARE YOUR MANNERS? 341 00:14:41,867 --> 00:14:43,533 - ME, MANNERS? YOU, MANNERS! 342 00:14:43,533 --> 00:14:44,967 YOU WERE RIGHT. YOU WERE RIGHT, MAN. 343 00:14:44,967 --> 00:14:46,467 THEY HAVE NO SENSE OF HUMOR. 344 00:14:46,467 --> 00:14:48,167 - I THINK THEY'RE THE FEEL-GOOD HIT OF THE SEASON. 345 00:14:48,167 --> 00:14:50,400 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, RAYMOND? 346 00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:52,233 - OH, COME ON, MA, YOU DIDN'T LIKE OUR SKIT, 347 00:14:52,233 --> 00:14:53,900 SO YOU WENT OUT OF YOUR WAY TO EMBARRASS US. 348 00:14:53,900 --> 00:14:56,033 - WE LOVED YOUR SKIT. DIDN'T WE, FRANK? 349 00:14:56,033 --> 00:14:57,600 - YEAH, FOR THOSE FIVE MINUTES, 350 00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:00,833 I DIDN'T MIND EVERYBODY DRINKIN' MY BOOZE. 351 00:15:00,833 --> 00:15:03,000 - OKAY, YOU KNOW, LET'S JUST BE HONEST, ALL RIGHT? 352 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:04,300 WE'RE SORRY WE MADE FUN OF YOU. 353 00:15:04,300 --> 00:15:06,100 WE'RE SORRY WE HURT YOUR FEELINGS. 354 00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:08,267 - HURT OUR FEELINGS? WE WERE LAUGHING. 355 00:15:08,267 --> 00:15:10,367 EVERYBODY WAS LAUGHING. 356 00:15:10,367 --> 00:15:11,833 - WELL, THEN WHY'D YOU LASH OUT AT US? 357 00:15:11,833 --> 00:15:14,600 - WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT? 358 00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:17,233 WE WERE BEIN' FUNNY, JUST LIKE YOU. 359 00:15:17,233 --> 00:15:19,233 - BEIN' FUNNY, JUST LIKE US. 360 00:15:19,233 --> 00:15:22,333 LET ME EXPLAIN SOMETHING ABOUT HUMOR TO YOU PEOPLE. 361 00:15:30,833 --> 00:15:32,400 YEAH, SEE? RIGHT THERE. 362 00:15:32,400 --> 00:15:36,000 THAT'S A PERFECT EXAMPLE OF SOMETHING THAT IS NOT FUNNY. 363 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:37,667 AND ALSO UGLY. 364 00:15:42,467 --> 00:15:43,933 I THINK THAT YOU NEED TO LEARN 365 00:15:43,933 --> 00:15:47,633 THAT USUALLY WHAT MAKES SOMETHING FUNNY IS ITS TONE, 366 00:15:47,633 --> 00:15:49,767 A LIGHT, COMIC FEELING. 367 00:15:49,767 --> 00:15:52,133 THAT'S WHY PEOPLE WERE LAUGHING DURING OUR SKIT: 368 00:15:52,133 --> 00:15:54,700 WE HAD THE SPIRIT OF FUN ABOUT US. 369 00:15:54,700 --> 00:15:56,167 THEREFORE, THE AUDIENCE WAS FREE 370 00:15:56,167 --> 00:15:57,933 TO FEEL COMFORTABLE AND AMUSED. 371 00:15:57,933 --> 00:16:01,100 - WILL THIS LECTURE BE AVAILABLE ON AUDIOCASSETTE? 372 00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:06,133 - I'M TELLING YOU, RAY, 373 00:16:06,133 --> 00:16:08,267 I HEARD PEOPLE LAUGHING AT OUR STUFF TOO. 374 00:16:08,267 --> 00:16:10,167 - YEAH, OKAY FINE, IF YOU WANT THAT KIND OF LAUGH. 375 00:16:10,167 --> 00:16:11,500 THOSE WERE CHEAP LAUGHS. 376 00:16:11,500 --> 00:16:13,300 - THEY WERE? - OF COURSE THEY WERE. 377 00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:15,100 OH, GRANNY SAID "IDIOT." 378 00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,533 WHAT'S CLEVER ABOUT THAT? 379 00:16:16,533 --> 00:16:18,667 - YEAH, AND WHEN DID I EVER DO THIS? 380 00:16:22,633 --> 00:16:24,500 - ALL RIGHT, SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT: 381 00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:26,500 IT'S OKAY TO POKE FUN AT MOM AND DAD, 382 00:16:26,500 --> 00:16:28,833 BUT YOU GUYS ARE STRICTLY OFF-LIMITS? 383 00:16:28,833 --> 00:16:30,967 - NO, NO... 384 00:16:30,967 --> 00:16:33,900 NO. 385 00:16:33,900 --> 00:16:35,367 - I MEAN, COME ON, ROBERT! 386 00:16:35,367 --> 00:16:37,133 THERE IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE HERE! 387 00:16:37,133 --> 00:16:39,167 WE HAD TO THINK UP WHAT WE WERE GONNA SAY. 388 00:16:39,167 --> 00:16:40,833 THEY WERE SO READY WITH THEIR ATTACK! 389 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:42,133 - YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT, 390 00:16:42,133 --> 00:16:43,467 LIKE YOU PRACTICE IT IN YOUR BASEMENT. 391 00:16:43,467 --> 00:16:44,700 - YEAH. 392 00:16:44,700 --> 00:16:47,033 - AH...YOU KNOW, I THINK WHAT WE'RE SEEING HERE 393 00:16:47,033 --> 00:16:49,600 IS THAT HUMOR, WHILE SO OFTEN A TONIC, 394 00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:54,200 CAN BE A POISON TO THOSE UNPREPARED TO TAKE IT. 395 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:58,600 both: AH. 396 00:16:58,600 --> 00:16:59,800 - YEAH, YEAH, GREAT. 397 00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:04,100 WHY DON'T YOU BA-DOO-DEE-DO OUT OF HERE? 398 00:17:04,100 --> 00:17:06,367 - OKAY... 399 00:17:06,367 --> 00:17:08,267 NOW, SEE, A LINE LIKE THAT 400 00:17:08,267 --> 00:17:09,900 JUST ROLLS OFF MY BACK, 401 00:17:09,900 --> 00:17:14,533 WHEREAS IF I CALL YOU A NAME LIKE "NOSY NOSENSTEIN"... 402 00:17:17,100 --> 00:17:19,767 YOU GET YOUR BIG HONKER ALL OUT OF WHACK. 403 00:17:22,067 --> 00:17:23,700 BEEP! BEEP! 404 00:17:32,100 --> 00:17:34,667 - LOOK, OUR SKIT WAS ALL IN FUN. 405 00:17:34,667 --> 00:17:37,400 WE WERE EVEN WORRIED ABOUT OFFENDING YOU. 406 00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:39,000 - WHY WOULD YOU BE OFFENDING US? 407 00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:41,767 - YEAH, YOU THINK YOU'RE TELLING US STUFF WE DON'T KNOW? 408 00:17:41,767 --> 00:17:44,633 MARIE KNOWS SHE'S A BIG PAIN IN THE ASS. 409 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:50,033 - AND FRANK KNOWS HE'S A PIG WITH SHOES. 410 00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:55,000 - HEY, YEAH, I TELL YOU WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN FUNNY-- 411 00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,300 IF YOU HAD TALKED ABOUT THE TIME 412 00:17:56,300 --> 00:17:58,167 WE DROVE THE CAR THROUGH YOUR HOUSE. 413 00:17:58,167 --> 00:18:03,067 [both laughing] 414 00:18:03,067 --> 00:18:05,467 - NOW, THAT WAS HYSTERICAL! 415 00:18:07,533 --> 00:18:08,867 - OKAY, BUT-- 416 00:18:08,867 --> 00:18:13,567 YOU KNOW, I REALLY DID HURT MY PINKIE THAT TIME. 417 00:18:13,567 --> 00:18:15,967 - OH, RAYMOND... 418 00:18:15,967 --> 00:18:17,867 RAYMOND... 419 00:18:17,867 --> 00:18:19,533 YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME: 420 00:18:19,533 --> 00:18:21,733 WE DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT YOUR FEELINGS 421 00:18:21,733 --> 00:18:24,400 WITH OUR LITTLE IMITATIONS. 422 00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:27,300 BUT NOW THAT I KNOW YOU BOTH ARE SO SENSITIVE, 423 00:18:27,300 --> 00:18:32,433 WE WILL NEVER MAKE THOSE KINDS OF JOKES AGAIN. 424 00:18:32,433 --> 00:18:34,633 ALL RIGHT? 425 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:38,900 - WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE. 426 00:18:38,900 --> 00:18:42,033 I MEAN, YOU'RE IMPLYING THAT WE CAN'T TAKE A JOKE. 427 00:18:42,033 --> 00:18:43,467 AND OF COURSE WE CAN. 428 00:18:43,467 --> 00:18:45,100 - OF COURSE WE CAN. I LOVE TO TAKE A JOKE. 429 00:18:45,100 --> 00:18:48,500 - YES, NOW THAT WE KNOW THAT YOU WERE JUST KIDDING AROUND, 430 00:18:48,500 --> 00:18:49,567 WE ARE FINE. 431 00:18:49,567 --> 00:18:51,333 WE LAUGH AT OURSELVES ALL THE TIME. 432 00:18:51,333 --> 00:18:52,633 - ALL THE TIME. WE'RE LAUGHIN'. 433 00:18:52,633 --> 00:18:54,500 WE'RE JOKIN' ALL THE TIME. 434 00:18:54,500 --> 00:18:56,200 - I MEAN, EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT HE'S KIND OF A WHINY BABY 435 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:57,500 WHO NEEDS HIS MOMMY 436 00:18:57,500 --> 00:18:59,433 AND NEVER DOES ANYTHING AROUND THE HOUSE. 437 00:18:59,433 --> 00:19:00,967 - THAT'S RIGHT. THAT'S RIGHT. 438 00:19:00,967 --> 00:19:02,967 AND YOU'RE LIKE AN UPTIGHT, CRANKY YELL MACHINE. 439 00:19:02,967 --> 00:19:04,633 [both laughing] 440 00:19:04,633 --> 00:19:08,100 WITH STICK-OUT-Y EARS. 441 00:19:08,100 --> 00:19:09,300 - YEAH, SO YOU SEE, 442 00:19:09,300 --> 00:19:11,567 WE HAVE A PERFECTLY GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR. 443 00:19:11,567 --> 00:19:13,700 - SO EVERYBODY'S OKAY, THEN? 444 00:19:13,700 --> 00:19:14,700 both: YEAH, SURE. 445 00:19:14,700 --> 00:19:15,900 - ABSOLUTELY. - ARE YOU KIDDING? 446 00:19:15,900 --> 00:19:19,100 WE'RE FUN PEOPLE! 447 00:19:19,100 --> 00:19:20,967 - OKAY, GOOD. - OKAY. 448 00:19:20,967 --> 00:19:23,867 - OH, I'M SO RELIEVED. 449 00:19:23,867 --> 00:19:25,400 - YEAH, ME TOO, 450 00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:29,133 'CAUSE THERE WAS NO WAY I WAS GONNA STOP WITH THE JOKES. 451 00:19:29,133 --> 00:19:30,633 - WE DON'T WANT YOU TO. 452 00:19:30,633 --> 00:19:32,400 - NO WAY. THAT'S WHAT FAMILIES ARE ALL ABOUT. 453 00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:34,000 - GOOD NIGHT. - ALL RIGHT, GOOD NIGHT. 454 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:36,333 - THAT WAS FUN. [laughs] 455 00:19:36,333 --> 00:19:37,800 - WELL, YOU KNOW, I GOT TO TELL YOU, 456 00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:39,433 I REALLY MISJUDGED YOU GUYS. 457 00:19:39,433 --> 00:19:42,033 YOU'RE MUCH BETTER SPORTS THAN I GAVE YOU CREDIT FOR. 458 00:19:42,033 --> 00:19:43,967 AND YOUR SKIT WAS FUNNY TOO. 459 00:19:43,967 --> 00:19:45,900 - THANKS, ROBERT. - THANKS, MAN. 460 00:19:45,900 --> 00:19:48,633 - YOU KNOW, LIKE I ALWAYS SAY: 461 00:19:48,633 --> 00:19:50,333 "LIVE, LOVE, LAUGH." 462 00:19:53,233 --> 00:19:55,000 I'LL SEE YOU. 463 00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:02,667 - "CRANKY, UPTIGHT YELL MACHINE"? 464 00:20:02,667 --> 00:20:05,867 - HEY, WHOA! WHAT ABOUT YOU? "WHINY BABY, NEEDY MOMMY!" 465 00:20:05,867 --> 00:20:07,767 - I ONLY SAY THAT BECAUSE IT'S TRUE! 466 00:20:07,767 --> 00:20:09,167 - OH, LOOK OUT. 467 00:20:09,167 --> 00:20:10,333 DON'T WANT TO TURN ON THE YELL MACHINE, 468 00:20:10,333 --> 00:20:11,833 'CAUSE THERE'S NO OFF SWITCH! 469 00:20:11,833 --> 00:20:13,567 - "MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMY! MY WIFE IS BEING MEAN TO ME." 470 00:20:13,567 --> 00:20:16,067 - MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH, MEH! 471 00:20:16,067 --> 00:20:17,567 - OH, YEAH. THAT'S A GOOD COMEBACK. 472 00:20:17,567 --> 00:20:19,500 - "THAT'S A GOOD COMEBACK." 473 00:20:19,500 --> 00:20:20,967 - OH, THERE'S ANOTHER ONE. - "OH, THERE'S ANOTHER ONE." 474 00:20:20,967 --> 00:20:23,400 - YOU'RE AN IDIOT. - MEH, MEH, MEH! 475 00:20:42,433 --> 00:20:43,733 - 10. 476 00:20:46,733 --> 00:20:48,433 11. 477 00:20:51,100 --> 00:20:53,000 WAIT A MINUTE. 478 00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:54,700 THERE'S A TEASPOON MISSING. 479 00:20:58,067 --> 00:20:59,600 THERE'S SUPPOSED TO BE 12 TEASPOONS. 480 00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:03,067 THERE'S ONLY 11. MA, WHAT THE HELL? 481 00:21:03,067 --> 00:21:05,300 - WHAT ARE YOU YAPPIN' ABOUT? 482 00:21:05,300 --> 00:21:07,000 - THERE'S SUPPOSED TO BE 12 TEASPOONS. 483 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:09,600 THIS IS AN INCOMPLETE SET! 484 00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:14,133 - WHAT PARTY ARE YOU GONNA GIVE WITH 12 GUESTS? 485 00:21:14,133 --> 00:21:18,333 - A BIG PARTY, 'CAUSE IT'LL BE THE READING OF YOUR WILL! 486 00:21:20,433 --> 00:21:21,933 MAYBE IT GOT SCRAPED INTO THE TRASH CAN. 487 00:21:21,933 --> 00:21:23,367 MAYBE IT'S IN THE TRASH. 488 00:21:33,900 --> 00:21:35,767 [knocking] 489 00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:48,600 THAT IS NOT FUNNY!