1 00:00:02,700 --> 00:00:05,433 [tv announcer speaking indistinctly] 2 00:00:05,433 --> 00:00:06,967 - THE GAME STARTED ALREADY? 3 00:00:06,967 --> 00:00:08,667 - NO, THEY'RE WAITING FOR YOU. 4 00:00:11,233 --> 00:00:13,233 - HI, GUYS. - HEY, DEB. 5 00:00:13,233 --> 00:00:14,700 - HEY, BLUBBERHEAD. 6 00:00:14,700 --> 00:00:16,600 - HI, HONEY. 7 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:18,333 DON'T FILL UP ON TOO MUCH JUNK FOOD 8 00:00:18,333 --> 00:00:20,600 'CAUSE I'M COOKING US DINNER. 9 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:22,633 - YOU CALL HER BLUBBERHEAD AND GET A KISS? 10 00:00:22,633 --> 00:00:24,100 - HA. YEAH. 11 00:00:24,100 --> 00:00:26,367 YEAH, IT'S FUNNY, I COULD CALL HER ANYTHING, REALLY, 12 00:00:26,367 --> 00:00:28,933 AS LONG AS I GIVE IT THAT, YOU KNOW, SPIN TO IT. 13 00:00:28,933 --> 00:00:32,200 "HEY, BLUBBERHEAD." 14 00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:33,500 - HEY, WAIT A MINUTE, WAIT A MINUTE. 15 00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:34,600 YOU COULDN'T JUST CALL HER ANYTHING. 16 00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:36,033 - YEAH, YEAH. NO, I COULD. 17 00:00:36,033 --> 00:00:38,267 SHE JUST HEARS THE CUTE TONE, YOU KNOW? 18 00:00:38,267 --> 00:00:40,267 SHE DOESN'T REALLY HEAR THE WORD. 19 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:48,600 - HOW ABOUT "FAT LEGS"? 20 00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:49,667 - WHAT? 21 00:00:49,667 --> 00:00:51,800 - YOU COULDN'T CALL HER "FAT LEGS." 22 00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:55,400 - YEAH, I COULD, AS LONG AS I CUTESY IT UP. 23 00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:56,900 - NO WAY. - YEAH, NO WAY. 24 00:00:56,900 --> 00:00:58,633 - HEY, I THINK WE-- 25 00:00:58,633 --> 00:01:01,733 WE DRANK THE LAST OF THE CHOCOLATE MILK, FAT LEGS. 26 00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:07,100 - OKAY, I'LL PICK UP SOME MORE TOMORROW. 27 00:01:07,967 --> 00:01:08,967 - [chuckling] - WOW. 28 00:01:08,967 --> 00:01:10,733 - THAT'S UNBELIEVABLE! 29 00:01:10,733 --> 00:01:12,200 - LET'S TRY ANOTHER ONE. 30 00:01:12,200 --> 00:01:13,933 - YEAH, LET'S SEE HOW FAR YOU CAN PUSH IT. 31 00:01:13,933 --> 00:01:16,233 - ALL RIGHT, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT? I'M TELLING YOU, IT'S FOOLPROOF. 32 00:01:16,233 --> 00:01:18,067 - HEY, COME ON, RAY. SHE'S GONNA GET MAD. 33 00:01:18,067 --> 00:01:19,433 - SMELLY. HOW ABOUT SMELLY? 34 00:01:19,433 --> 00:01:21,000 - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, I'LL TRY SMELLY. 35 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:23,767 - NO, NO. IT'S TOO EASY. 36 00:01:23,767 --> 00:01:25,633 TRAMPY. 37 00:01:25,633 --> 00:01:26,633 TRY TRAMPY. 38 00:01:26,633 --> 00:01:28,200 - GUYS, GUYS, COME ON. 39 00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:29,567 - I GOT IT, I GOT IT. 40 00:01:29,567 --> 00:01:31,667 "SMELLY TRAMP." 41 00:01:31,667 --> 00:01:34,833 - OH, BOY. - NO, NO, IT CAN HAPPEN. 42 00:01:34,833 --> 00:01:36,367 - RAY, DID YOU PICK UP THE MAIL? 43 00:01:36,367 --> 00:01:38,500 - YEAH, IT'S OVER THERE. 44 00:01:42,033 --> 00:01:44,267 NOTHING BUT BILLS TODAY, SMELLY TRAMP. 45 00:01:45,300 --> 00:01:47,700 - I KNOW. WE ALWAYS GET SO MUCH-- 46 00:02:00,967 --> 00:02:02,100 - ROBERT MADE ME DO IT. 47 00:02:07,467 --> 00:02:09,900 I WASN'T TRYING TO HUMILIATE YOU. 48 00:02:09,900 --> 00:02:11,200 - OH, SO I SHOULD BE FLATTERED 49 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:15,400 THAT MY HUSBAND CALLS ME A "SMELLY TRAMP"? 50 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:19,233 - FIRST OF ALL, I DIDN'T CALL YOU THAT. 51 00:02:19,233 --> 00:02:22,200 I CALLED YOU "THMELLY TRAMP"! 52 00:02:25,233 --> 00:02:26,900 COME ON. I'M SORRY, ALL RIGHT? 53 00:02:26,900 --> 00:02:29,633 - IT'S JUST THAT YOU'RE SO IMMATURE ALL THE TIME. 54 00:02:29,633 --> 00:02:32,500 - THAT'S NOT TRUE, ALL RIGHT? IT ISN'T. 55 00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:33,533 - OH, NO? 56 00:02:33,533 --> 00:02:35,233 WHO MADE GEOFFREY CRY AT CHRISTMAS 57 00:02:35,233 --> 00:02:37,267 BECAUSE DADDY HAD TO TRY THE TOY AIRPLANE 58 00:02:37,267 --> 00:02:40,600 BEFORE ANYBODY ELSE? 59 00:02:40,600 --> 00:02:43,333 - HEY, IT TOOK TWO HOURS TO PUT THE DAMN THING TOGETHER. 60 00:02:43,333 --> 00:02:45,933 I CAN'T GET ONE THROW? 61 00:02:45,933 --> 00:02:49,500 - AND WHO DOES THE HYSTERICAL NURSERY RHYMES FOR THE KIDS? 62 00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:51,433 "LITTLE JACK HORNER SAT IN THE CORNER, 63 00:02:51,433 --> 00:02:54,300 SOMETHING, SOMETHING, POOP AND PEE." 64 00:02:56,067 --> 00:02:59,667 - YOU GOT TO GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT. 65 00:03:01,067 --> 00:03:03,533 - HOW ABOUT SETTING AN EXAMPLE FOR THEM? 66 00:03:03,533 --> 00:03:05,367 - I'M A GREAT EXAMPLE, OKAY? 67 00:03:05,367 --> 00:03:06,800 YEAH, I KID AROUND, 68 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:09,233 BUT WHEN IT'S CRUNCH TIME, I'M RIGHT THERE. 69 00:03:09,233 --> 00:03:10,633 - OH, YEAH, LIKE THE OTHER DAY 70 00:03:10,633 --> 00:03:13,067 WHEN ALLY WAS ASKING YOU HOW BABIES GET HERE, 71 00:03:13,067 --> 00:03:14,767 AND YOU SUDDENLY HAD A SNEEZE ATTACK 72 00:03:14,767 --> 00:03:17,600 AND RAN OUT OF THE ROOM? 73 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:21,133 - SO I SHOULD JUST SNEEZE ON MY DAUGHTER? 74 00:03:21,133 --> 00:03:23,333 - WHATEVER. GOOD NIGHT. 75 00:03:25,867 --> 00:03:28,667 - WHAT, YOU WANT ME TO HAVE THE SEX TALK WITH HER? 76 00:03:28,667 --> 00:03:30,433 - YEAH, RIGHT. 77 00:03:30,433 --> 00:03:31,833 - WHAT, YOU DON'T THINK I CAN DO IT? 78 00:03:31,833 --> 00:03:34,167 I CAN DO IT; I'LL HAVE THE SEX TALK WITH HER. 79 00:03:34,167 --> 00:03:35,833 - YOU KNOW WHAT, RAY, YOU CAN BE THERE, 80 00:03:35,833 --> 00:03:38,033 AND I'LL EXPLAIN IT TO THE BOTH OF YOU. 81 00:03:46,467 --> 00:03:48,900 - YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M GONNA DO IT. 82 00:03:48,900 --> 00:03:52,467 - RAY, THIS IS NOT SOMETHING TO BE COMPETITIVE ABOUT, 83 00:03:52,467 --> 00:03:53,433 SO STOP IT. 84 00:03:53,433 --> 00:03:55,033 - NO. NO! YOU STOP IT, ALL RIGHT? 85 00:03:55,033 --> 00:03:56,700 YOU SAY THAT I'M AN IMMATURE PARENT, 86 00:03:56,700 --> 00:03:58,767 AND NOW I WANT TO DO SOMETHING FOR MY CHILD 87 00:03:58,767 --> 00:04:00,967 THAT'S IMPORTANT AND IT'S RESPONSIBLE, 88 00:04:00,967 --> 00:04:02,300 AND YOU WON'T LET ME? 89 00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:13,367 - HERE. 90 00:04:13,367 --> 00:04:14,767 - WHAT? WHAT'S THIS? 91 00:04:14,767 --> 00:04:16,900 - IT'S A BOOK I WAS READING ABOUT THIS. 92 00:04:16,900 --> 00:04:19,300 - REALLY? A BOOK? 93 00:04:19,300 --> 00:04:21,600 - UH, YEAH. YOU HAVE TO PREPARE. 94 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:24,567 YOU CAN'T JUST GO IN THERE AND DO A PUPPET SHOW. 95 00:04:28,700 --> 00:04:31,433 - ALL RIGHT. 96 00:04:31,433 --> 00:04:37,533 YEAH, YEAH, THIS ALL LOOKS FAMILIAR... 97 00:04:37,533 --> 00:04:41,033 ALTHOUGH IT'S BEEN A WHILE. 98 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:44,967 HEY, HOW DO YOU PRONOUNCE THAT AGAIN? 99 00:04:44,967 --> 00:04:49,967 - FALLOPIAN. 100 00:04:49,967 --> 00:04:53,233 - NOT "FALL-AH-PIAN"? 101 00:04:53,233 --> 00:04:55,033 RIGHT, RIGHT. FALLOPIAN, YEAH. 102 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:01,833 [knocking] 103 00:05:01,833 --> 00:05:03,867 ALLY? 104 00:05:03,867 --> 00:05:04,967 - HI, DADDY. 105 00:05:04,967 --> 00:05:06,800 - HI. WHATCHA DOIN'? 106 00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:08,467 - JUST PLAYING WITH MY DOLLS. 107 00:05:08,467 --> 00:05:10,133 - OH, GOOD. 108 00:05:10,133 --> 00:05:12,833 GOOD. 109 00:05:12,833 --> 00:05:14,467 LISTEN, UM, 110 00:05:14,467 --> 00:05:16,733 THE OTHER DAY YOU ASKED QUESTIONS 111 00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,800 ABOUT BABIES AND STUFF. 112 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,967 - WHEN YOU STARTED SNEEZING? 113 00:05:20,967 --> 00:05:22,800 - YEAH. 114 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:24,467 YES, YEAH. 115 00:05:24,467 --> 00:05:26,300 UM, ANYWAY, 116 00:05:26,300 --> 00:05:28,700 I WAS WONDERING IF YOU WANTED TO TALK ABOUT THAT NOW. 117 00:05:28,700 --> 00:05:30,167 - OKAY. 118 00:05:30,167 --> 00:05:31,600 - [sighs] 119 00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:33,633 GOOD, GOOD. 120 00:05:33,633 --> 00:05:37,300 LET ME TRY TO EXPLAIN A FEW THINGS. 121 00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:48,867 ALL RIGHT. 122 00:05:48,867 --> 00:05:51,033 OKAY. 123 00:05:51,033 --> 00:05:52,900 HERE'S WHAT HAPPENS. 124 00:05:52,900 --> 00:05:56,833 WHEN A MAN AND A WOMAN LOVE EACH OTHER VERY MUCH, 125 00:05:56,833 --> 00:05:58,267 THEY GET MARRIED, 126 00:05:58,267 --> 00:06:03,000 AND THEN SOMETIMES THEY DECIDE TO MAKE A BABY. 127 00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,133 - WHY ARE THERE BABIES? 128 00:06:04,133 --> 00:06:05,367 - RIGHT, RIGHT. 129 00:06:05,367 --> 00:06:08,467 OKAY, I'M GONNA GET TO THAT. 130 00:06:08,467 --> 00:06:10,200 OKAY. 131 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:12,233 WHAT A MAN AND A WOMAN DO IS-- 132 00:06:12,233 --> 00:06:15,133 - NO, I MEAN, I KNOW THAT THE MAN AND THE WOMAN 133 00:06:15,133 --> 00:06:17,567 HAVE TO DO SOMETHING, BUT... 134 00:06:17,567 --> 00:06:19,100 WHY ARE WE BORN? 135 00:06:19,100 --> 00:06:21,767 WHY HAS GOD PUT US HERE? 136 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,067 - BECAUSE... 137 00:06:38,067 --> 00:06:40,533 THAT'S... 138 00:06:40,533 --> 00:06:43,033 WHAT? 139 00:06:46,533 --> 00:06:49,200 - IF WE ALL GO TO HEAVEN WHEN WE DIE, 140 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:52,100 THEN WHY DOES GOD WANT US HERE FIRST? 141 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:02,467 - UM... 142 00:07:02,467 --> 00:07:05,633 WHY DOES GOD WANT US HERE? 143 00:07:05,633 --> 00:07:07,533 - YEAH, WHY? 144 00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:20,600 WHY ARE WE HERE, DADDY? 145 00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:23,167 - YEAH, I HEARD YOU, I HEARD YOU. 146 00:07:25,733 --> 00:07:29,333 YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT SEX? 147 00:07:31,767 --> 00:07:33,000 - NO. 148 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:38,267 - YOU EVER HEAR THE WORD "FALLOPIAN"? 149 00:07:38,267 --> 00:07:41,833 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 150 00:07:41,833 --> 00:07:43,500 OKAY, YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW 151 00:07:43,500 --> 00:07:45,600 WHY GOD WANTS US HERE FIRST. 152 00:07:46,667 --> 00:07:49,333 THAT'S A GOOD QUESTION. 153 00:07:49,333 --> 00:07:52,233 YOU SEE, GOD IS UP IN HEAVEN, 154 00:07:52,233 --> 00:07:55,900 AND, WELL, HONEY... 155 00:07:55,900 --> 00:07:58,233 IT'S VERY CROWDED UP THERE. 156 00:08:03,033 --> 00:08:05,100 - IT IS? 157 00:08:05,100 --> 00:08:07,000 - YEAH. YEAH. 158 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:08,400 AND YOU DON'T WANT TO BE IN HEAVEN 159 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:10,333 IF IT'S CROWDED, RIGHT? 160 00:08:10,333 --> 00:08:11,967 REMEMBER WHEN WE WENT TO DISNEY WORLD, 161 00:08:11,967 --> 00:08:14,633 HOW CROWDED THAT WAS? 162 00:08:14,633 --> 00:08:17,833 I MEAN, IT WAS FUN, BUT IT WAS TOO CROWDED, RIGHT? 163 00:08:17,833 --> 00:08:24,000 SO GOD, HE SENDS US DOWN TO EARTH FOR A LITTLE WHILE TO... 164 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:28,067 EASE THE HEAVENLY CONGESTION. 165 00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:39,033 - WHAT? 166 00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:44,300 - [feigns sneezing] 167 00:08:44,300 --> 00:08:46,600 OH, HERE WE GO AGAIN! AH-CHOO! 168 00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:48,500 I DON'T WANT TO-- AH-CHOO! 169 00:08:48,500 --> 00:08:49,900 I DON'T WANT YOU TO CATCH THIS. 170 00:08:49,900 --> 00:08:52,400 I DON'T WANT YOU TO-- AH-CHOO! 171 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:55,067 I'LL BE BACK IN A MINUTE. AH-CHOO! 172 00:09:00,433 --> 00:09:02,967 AH-CHOO! 173 00:09:02,967 --> 00:09:04,467 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 174 00:09:04,467 --> 00:09:07,267 YOU WERE ONLY UP THERE LIKE-- - I GOT BLINDSIDED! 175 00:09:07,267 --> 00:09:08,600 - WHAT? WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 176 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:10,333 - ALLY DIDN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT SEX. 177 00:09:10,333 --> 00:09:12,233 SHE STARTED ASKING QUESTIONS ABOUT LIFE, 178 00:09:12,233 --> 00:09:15,933 WHY DID GOD PUT US HERE, CRAZY STUFF LIKE THAT. 179 00:09:15,933 --> 00:09:17,667 - WOW! SO WHAT DID YOU SAY? 180 00:09:17,667 --> 00:09:21,000 - I TOLD HER WE'RE HERE BECAUSE HEAVEN IS CROWDED. 181 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:24,600 - YOU SAID HEAVEN IS CROWDED? 182 00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:27,400 - I GOT AMBUSHED! 183 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,867 - OH, MY GOD, RAY, YOU'VE GOT TO GET BACK UP THERE! 184 00:09:28,867 --> 00:09:30,500 - NO, YOU GO! YOU GO UP THERE! 185 00:09:30,500 --> 00:09:32,433 - YOU'RE THE ONE THAT WANTED TO PROVE HE'S MATURE. 186 00:09:32,433 --> 00:09:34,600 WHY CAN'T YOU HAVE THIS DISCUSSION WITH YOUR DAUGHTER? 187 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:37,400 - BECAUSE I STUDIED FOR THE SEX ONE! 188 00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:38,967 I WASN'T READY FOR THIS! 189 00:09:38,967 --> 00:09:41,133 I DON'T JUST HAVE A SWITCH THAT CAN MAKE ME SMART! 190 00:09:41,133 --> 00:09:42,833 - NO KIDDING. 191 00:09:42,833 --> 00:09:45,167 COME ON, YOU COULDN'T COME UP WITH ANYTHING? 192 00:09:45,167 --> 00:09:47,667 JUST TELL HER WE'RE PUT ON EARTH TO... 193 00:09:47,667 --> 00:09:49,633 YOU KNOW, BECAUSE... 194 00:09:49,633 --> 00:09:51,367 - WELL, LOOKY HERE! 195 00:09:51,367 --> 00:09:52,900 YEAH, LITTLE MISS SMARTY-PANTS! 196 00:09:52,900 --> 00:09:54,733 MAYBE IT IS "FALL-AH-PIAN"! 197 00:09:57,700 --> 00:09:58,500 - HEY. 198 00:09:58,500 --> 00:10:00,067 - GAME'S ON SATELLITE. 199 00:10:00,067 --> 00:10:02,467 - AND I MADE CANNOLIS. 200 00:10:02,467 --> 00:10:04,100 - ACTUALLY, YOU KNOW WHAT, 201 00:10:04,100 --> 00:10:06,067 WE'RE KIND OF IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING, RIGHT, RAY? 202 00:10:06,067 --> 00:10:07,133 - WHAT, YOU ONLY MADE FOUR? 203 00:10:07,133 --> 00:10:08,800 - RAY! 204 00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:10,600 - I'M SORRY, IT'S JUST THAT THERE'S FIVE OF US HERE. 205 00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:12,133 - I MADE SIX, BUT YOUR FATHER GOT AT 'EM. 206 00:10:12,133 --> 00:10:13,133 - NO. 207 00:10:13,133 --> 00:10:14,500 NO, I DIDN'T. 208 00:10:14,500 --> 00:10:16,067 WELL, THEN, I GUESS TWO OF THEM HAD WINGS, 209 00:10:16,067 --> 00:10:18,833 'CAUSE THEY JUST FLEW AWAY. 210 00:10:18,833 --> 00:10:22,200 - YEAH, WELL, MAKE ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE AND CLIMB ABOARD. 211 00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:26,000 - YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW WHAT? 212 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,367 THIS REALLY IS NOT A GOOD TIME. 213 00:10:27,367 --> 00:10:28,933 - WHY, WHAT'S GOING ON? WHAT'S WRONG? 214 00:10:28,933 --> 00:10:32,267 - YOU TWO ABOUT TO SHACK IT UP? 215 00:10:32,267 --> 00:10:33,733 - NO, WE'RE NOT SHACKING IT UP. 216 00:10:33,733 --> 00:10:35,133 ALLY JUST STARTED ASKING SOME QUESTIONS 217 00:10:35,133 --> 00:10:36,500 ABOUT WHERE BABIES COME FROM, 218 00:10:36,500 --> 00:10:38,100 AND RAY WAS GOING TO TALK TO HER ABOUT IT-- 219 00:10:38,100 --> 00:10:43,133 - WAIT A MINUTE, YOU WERE GONNA TALK TO A CHILD ABOUT S-E-X? 220 00:10:43,133 --> 00:10:44,767 - MARIE, IF SHE'S ASKING QUESTIONS, 221 00:10:44,767 --> 00:10:45,800 WE HAVE TO ANSWER HER. 222 00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:48,267 - NO, YOU DON'T. 223 00:10:48,267 --> 00:10:50,167 MY BOYS HAD ALL SORTS OF QUESTIONS, 224 00:10:50,167 --> 00:10:52,200 BUT I HAD FRANK WAIT UNTIL THEY WERE TEENAGERS 225 00:10:52,200 --> 00:10:53,200 TO TALK TO THEM. 226 00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:56,367 - NOBODY TALKED TO ME. 227 00:10:56,367 --> 00:10:58,567 - YEAH, WHAT? ME NEITHER. 228 00:10:58,567 --> 00:11:00,967 - FRANK, YOU TOLD ME YOU'D TALK TO THEM. 229 00:11:00,967 --> 00:11:03,667 - WHY? WHAT DID THEY NEED TO HEAR? 230 00:11:03,667 --> 00:11:06,833 NO ONE NEEDS TO TELL A BEE WHERE TO GO TO GET THE HONEY. 231 00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:07,967 AM I RIGHT, RAY? 232 00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:12,133 - ALL RIGHT, DAD, ALL RIGHT. 233 00:11:12,133 --> 00:11:14,567 - THIS IS TERRIBLE. 234 00:11:14,567 --> 00:11:16,900 YOU KNOW, ROBERT, THIS MIGHT EXPLAIN 235 00:11:16,900 --> 00:11:18,900 WHY YOU'RE STILL SINGLE. 236 00:11:18,900 --> 00:11:22,467 - WHAT? 237 00:11:22,467 --> 00:11:26,200 - SEXUAL RELATIONS CAN BE VERY CONFUSING. 238 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:29,067 I SHOULD HAVE NEVER LEFT IT UP TO YOUR FATHER. 239 00:11:29,067 --> 00:11:30,400 DO YOU WANT TO TALK? 240 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:35,433 - YOU KNOW, I WOULD, 241 00:11:35,433 --> 00:11:38,867 BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'D DO WITH ALL THE VOMIT. 242 00:11:38,867 --> 00:11:41,733 - YOU KNOW, NO, 243 00:11:41,733 --> 00:11:43,133 CAN WE PLEASE STOP? 244 00:11:43,133 --> 00:11:44,467 LOOK, IT TURNS OUT ALLY DOESN'T WANT TO KNOW 245 00:11:44,467 --> 00:11:45,500 HOW WE GET HERE. 246 00:11:45,500 --> 00:11:47,367 SHE WANTS TO KNOW WHY WE'RE HERE, 247 00:11:47,367 --> 00:11:48,767 WHY GOD PUT US ON EARTH, 248 00:11:48,767 --> 00:11:51,067 AND SHE'S WAITING FOR RAY TO ANSWER HER. 249 00:11:51,067 --> 00:11:52,067 - WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? 250 00:11:52,067 --> 00:11:53,167 IT'S SIMPLE. 251 00:11:53,167 --> 00:11:54,533 - OH, OKAY. YEAH. 252 00:11:54,533 --> 00:11:56,167 WE'RE GONNA LEARN THE MEANING OF LIFE 253 00:11:56,167 --> 00:11:59,400 FROM A GUY WHO ONCE THREW HIS SHOE AT A SWAN. 254 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:01,667 - THAT'S CALLED PROTECTING YOUR SANDWICH. 255 00:12:03,133 --> 00:12:04,167 LISTEN TO ME. 256 00:12:04,167 --> 00:12:05,767 HERE'S WHAT LIFE IS: 257 00:12:05,767 --> 00:12:08,600 YOU'RE BORN, YOU GO TO SCHOOL, YOU GO TO WORK, YOU DIE. 258 00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:10,700 THAT'S IT. THAT'S ALL. 259 00:12:10,700 --> 00:12:13,100 CANNOLI, MARIE. 260 00:12:15,567 --> 00:12:17,233 - LISTEN, WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT 261 00:12:17,233 --> 00:12:19,867 WAT WE DO WHILE WE'RE HERE, DAD. 262 00:12:19,867 --> 00:12:23,467 - YEAH, THE BIG QUESTION IS WHY WE'RE HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE. 263 00:12:23,467 --> 00:12:25,567 YOU KNOW, I'VE SPENT MANY A NIGHT LYING IN BED 264 00:12:25,567 --> 00:12:27,733 THINKING ABOUT THIS KIND OF STUFF, 265 00:12:27,733 --> 00:12:31,967 LIFE'S...IMPONDERABLES. 266 00:12:31,967 --> 00:12:35,100 - YOU NEED TO FIND YOURSELF A BROAD, AND PRONTO. 267 00:12:37,900 --> 00:12:39,233 - WHERE ARE WE? 268 00:12:39,233 --> 00:12:41,667 WHERE ARE WE IN THE BIG SCHEME OF THINGS? 269 00:12:41,667 --> 00:12:45,233 - DON'T GOT TO BE A PRETTY ONE, JUST GRAB SOMETHING. 270 00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:49,867 - I THINK ALLY'S TOO YOUNG TO BE WORRYING ABOUT THINGS LIKE THIS. 271 00:12:49,867 --> 00:12:51,367 - NO, I'M PROUD OF HER. 272 00:12:51,367 --> 00:12:53,367 I LOVE IT THAT SHE'S SUCH AN INDEPENDENT THINKER. 273 00:12:53,367 --> 00:12:54,667 - IF SHE'S SO INDEPENDENT, 274 00:12:54,667 --> 00:12:57,400 WHY CAN'T SHE FIGURE THIS OUT HERSELF? 275 00:12:57,400 --> 00:12:59,500 - RAY, LISTEN, JUST GET UP THERE AND TELL HER 276 00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:01,133 THAT GOD PUT US ON EARTH TO HELP EACH OTHER. 277 00:13:01,133 --> 00:13:02,500 IT'S SIMPLE. IT'S DIRECT. 278 00:13:02,500 --> 00:13:04,367 IT'S A GOOD WAY FOR HER TO LIVE HER LIFE. 279 00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:05,467 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 280 00:13:05,467 --> 00:13:07,000 THAT DOESN'T ANSWER ANYTHING! 281 00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:08,733 WHAT, ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT GOD SAID, 282 00:13:08,733 --> 00:13:10,000 "HMM, EARTH. LET'S SEE. 283 00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:12,200 WHAT SHOULD I PUT THERE?" 284 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:16,667 - THAT'S YOUR GOD? 285 00:13:16,667 --> 00:13:17,667 - YEAH. 286 00:13:17,667 --> 00:13:18,800 - NO WAY! 287 00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:20,800 IT'S GOT TO BE DEEPER... 288 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:22,233 AND COOL. 289 00:13:22,233 --> 00:13:24,633 [deep and cool] "HELLO. I'M GOD." 290 00:13:32,333 --> 00:13:33,900 - KEEP GOING, RAYMOND. 291 00:13:33,900 --> 00:13:36,900 I THINK YOU'RE A WONDERFUL GOD. 292 00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:37,900 - THANK YOU. 293 00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:39,333 SO WHAT DID GOD SAY? 294 00:13:39,333 --> 00:13:41,100 "HEY, I'M GOING TO PUT SOME HUMANS ON EARTH 295 00:13:41,100 --> 00:13:42,500 "SO THEY CAN HELP EACH OTHER. 296 00:13:42,500 --> 00:13:45,133 "OR I COULD JUST SKIP HUMANS ALTOGETHER 297 00:13:45,133 --> 00:13:47,267 AND GO HIT A BUCKET OF BALLS." 298 00:13:48,700 --> 00:13:49,733 - OH, I KNOW! 299 00:13:49,733 --> 00:13:53,900 IT'S ALL IN THE BIBLE! 300 00:13:53,900 --> 00:13:56,900 - YOU EVER THINK ABOUT SPACE? 301 00:13:56,900 --> 00:13:58,000 WHAT IS IT? 302 00:13:58,000 --> 00:13:59,333 IS IT REALLY ENDLESS? 303 00:13:59,333 --> 00:14:00,867 I MEAN, IF YOU HAD A SPACESHIP, 304 00:14:00,867 --> 00:14:03,500 COULD YOU GO FLYING AND FLYING THROUGH SPACE FOREVER? 305 00:14:03,500 --> 00:14:06,200 - WHY DON'T YOU GIVE IT A SHOT? 306 00:14:10,733 --> 00:14:12,033 - NO! 307 00:14:12,033 --> 00:14:13,433 I'M NOT KIDDING AROUND HERE. 308 00:14:13,433 --> 00:14:15,033 I MEAN, HOW CAN SPACE GO ON FOREVER, 309 00:14:15,033 --> 00:14:16,467 AND IF IT DOESN'T, 310 00:14:16,467 --> 00:14:18,000 THEN WHAT'S AT THE END, HUH? 311 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:19,300 - STOP IT, ROBERT. 312 00:14:19,300 --> 00:14:22,200 YOU'LL GIVE YOURSELF A TUMMY ACHE. 313 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:24,667 - WHAT ABOUT THE BEGINNING OF TIME? 314 00:14:24,667 --> 00:14:27,100 WHAT WAS THERE BEFORE THAT, BEFORE TIME? 315 00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:28,500 NOTHING? I MEAN, WHAT IS NOTHING? 316 00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:29,800 HOW COULD THERE BE NOTHING? 317 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:32,900 THIS DOESN'T BOTHER ANYBODY ELSE? 318 00:14:32,900 --> 00:14:34,600 - OKAY, EVERYBODY LISTEN TO ME. 319 00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:37,067 SIT DOWN. 320 00:14:37,067 --> 00:14:38,233 LISTEN. 321 00:14:38,233 --> 00:14:39,467 "IN THE BEGINNING, 322 00:14:39,467 --> 00:14:41,833 GOD CREATED THE HEAVEN AND THE EARTH." 323 00:14:41,833 --> 00:14:43,433 OKAY, OKAY, OKAY. 324 00:14:44,900 --> 00:14:47,100 "LET THERE BE LIGHT." 325 00:14:48,233 --> 00:14:52,133 OKAY, OKAY, OKAY, OKAY. 326 00:14:52,133 --> 00:14:54,967 IT MIGHT TAKE ME A MINUTE MORE. 327 00:14:54,967 --> 00:14:56,867 - A MINUTE MORE? 328 00:14:56,867 --> 00:14:58,500 MARIE, RELIGIOUS SCHOLARS SPEND THEIR ENTIRE LIVES 329 00:14:58,500 --> 00:14:59,967 TRYING TO ANSWER THIS QUESTION. 330 00:14:59,967 --> 00:15:01,533 YOU'RE NOT JUST GONNA FLIP THROUGH THE BIBLE 331 00:15:01,533 --> 00:15:02,733 AND FIND THE MEANING OF LIFE. 332 00:15:02,733 --> 00:15:05,000 - OH, YE OF LITTLE FAITH. 333 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:07,033 THAT'S IN HERE SOMEWHERE, TOO. 334 00:15:08,467 --> 00:15:09,833 - LOOK, IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT'S IN THE BIBLE, 335 00:15:09,833 --> 00:15:12,067 WHY DON'T YOU TALK TO FATHER HUBLEY? 336 00:15:12,067 --> 00:15:13,633 - HEY, THAT'S RIGHT! 337 00:15:13,633 --> 00:15:15,533 YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S HIS JOB TO KNOW THESE THINGS. 338 00:15:15,533 --> 00:15:17,633 - WHAT, ARE YOU GONNA CALL HIM? - YEAH. 339 00:15:17,633 --> 00:15:20,100 WHAT ARE WE PUTTING THE MONEY IN THAT BASKET FOR? 340 00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:25,800 OH. 341 00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,233 AH, IT'S HIS MACHINE. 342 00:15:27,233 --> 00:15:30,000 HEY, FATHER HUBLEY, HI, IT'S RAYMOND BARONE. 343 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:31,433 - ASK HIM ABOUT SPACE. 344 00:15:31,433 --> 00:15:32,833 WHAT'S AT THE END? WHAT'S OUT THERE? 345 00:15:32,833 --> 00:15:34,667 - WILL YOU STOP IT? - WHAT'S OUT THERE? 346 00:15:34,667 --> 00:15:35,933 - ANYWAY, 347 00:15:35,933 --> 00:15:38,133 ME AND THE FAMILY WERE JUST SITTIN' AROUND, 348 00:15:38,133 --> 00:15:40,900 AND WE HAD A QUICK QUESTION FOR YOU. 349 00:15:40,900 --> 00:15:43,000 WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LIFE? 350 00:15:44,933 --> 00:15:47,267 SO IF YOU COULD GET BACK TO US AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, 351 00:15:47,267 --> 00:15:49,467 WE'D APPRECIATE IT, ALL RIGHT? 352 00:15:49,467 --> 00:15:51,367 WE'RE KIND OF WAITING. 353 00:15:51,367 --> 00:15:52,967 OKAY. THANK YOU. 354 00:15:52,967 --> 00:15:53,967 GOOD-BYE. 355 00:15:53,967 --> 00:15:55,800 GOD BLESS YOU. 356 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:57,600 AND US. 357 00:15:57,600 --> 00:16:00,800 AND THE MEEK. 358 00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:02,767 - HERE IT IS. HERE IT IS. 359 00:16:02,767 --> 00:16:07,200 "WHERE THERE ARE NO OXEN, THE CRIB REMAINS EMPTY, 360 00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:08,967 "BUT LARGE CROPS COME 361 00:16:08,967 --> 00:16:11,467 THROUGH THE STRENGTH OF THE BULL." 362 00:16:15,667 --> 00:16:18,367 - THAT'S GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS. 363 00:16:18,367 --> 00:16:20,133 - NO? 364 00:16:21,533 --> 00:16:23,767 - NO! 365 00:16:23,767 --> 00:16:25,600 - OKAY. 366 00:16:29,500 --> 00:16:35,433 - DO YOU KNOW THE FRUIT FLY ONLY LIVES ONE DAY? 367 00:16:35,433 --> 00:16:37,733 - HUH? WHAT? ARE YOU OKAY THERE? 368 00:16:37,733 --> 00:16:40,700 - ONE DAY. 369 00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:43,500 WHAT'S HIS MEANING OF LIFE, HUH? 370 00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:46,533 MAYBE THERE'S NO MEANING OF LIFE FOR ANY ONE OF US. 371 00:16:46,533 --> 00:16:48,033 I MEAN, REALLY, 372 00:16:48,033 --> 00:16:52,400 AM I ANY DIFFERENT THAN THE FRUIT FLY? 373 00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:56,100 - THE FRUIT PART'S THE SAME. 374 00:16:59,333 --> 00:17:01,167 - ROBERT, THE FRUIT FLY DOESN'T QUESTION WHY HE'S HERE. 375 00:17:01,167 --> 00:17:02,900 THAT'S WHAT MAKES US DIFFERENT. 376 00:17:02,900 --> 00:17:05,033 I DON'T KNOW, MAYBE THAT'S KIND OF THE MEANING OF LIFE: 377 00:17:05,033 --> 00:17:07,900 NEVER KNOWING THE ANSWER, BUT ALWAYS WONDERING ABOUT IT. 378 00:17:07,900 --> 00:17:11,067 - SO GOD MADE US SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW THAT THERE'S AN ANSWER, 379 00:17:11,067 --> 00:17:13,800 BUT NOT SMART ENOUGH TO FIGURE IT OUT? 380 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:16,533 - COME ON! 381 00:17:26,700 --> 00:17:28,667 - ALL RIGHT, LOOK, WHAT AM I GOING TO TELL ALLY? 382 00:17:28,667 --> 00:17:29,500 SHE'S WAITING NOW. 383 00:17:29,500 --> 00:17:30,833 - TELL HER TO COME DOWN HERE. 384 00:17:30,833 --> 00:17:32,000 I'LL SET HER STRAIGHT. 385 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:33,500 NO MORE OF THIS NONSENSE. 386 00:17:33,500 --> 00:17:35,367 - IT'S NOT NONSENSE, FRANK! 387 00:17:35,367 --> 00:17:37,267 HAVEN'T YOU EVER HEARD THAT THE UNEXAMINED LIFE 388 00:17:37,267 --> 00:17:38,800 IS NOT WORTH LIVING? 389 00:17:38,800 --> 00:17:40,633 - HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? 390 00:17:40,633 --> 00:17:42,700 [feigns snoring] 391 00:17:44,167 --> 00:17:46,167 - THAT'S YOUR PROBLEM, FRANK. 392 00:17:46,167 --> 00:17:47,600 YOU'RE SO CLOSED-MINDED. 393 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:51,200 - NO, THE PROBLEM IS, YOU'RE SO OPEN-MOUTHED. 394 00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:52,833 - NO, SHE'S RIGHT, FRANK. 395 00:17:52,833 --> 00:17:55,300 MAYBE IF YOU LET YOURSELF BE A LITTLE MORE OPEN-MINDED 396 00:17:55,300 --> 00:17:56,600 AND LET YOURSELF THINK ABOUT SOME OF THESE THINGS, 397 00:17:56,600 --> 00:17:58,533 LIFE MIGHT BE BETTER FOR ALL OF US. 398 00:17:58,533 --> 00:18:00,367 - OKAY, GREAT, YOU'VE GOT ANSWERS FOR EVERYBODY 399 00:18:00,367 --> 00:18:01,367 EXCEPT YOUR OWN DAUGHTER. 400 00:18:01,367 --> 00:18:02,767 - WHAT? - YOU HEARD HIM. 401 00:18:02,767 --> 00:18:04,733 IT'S ME AND HIM AGAINST ALL THREE OF YOU. 402 00:18:04,733 --> 00:18:07,067 - NO, IT'S NOT, DAD. 403 00:18:11,767 --> 00:18:14,500 I'M JUST SAYING WE SHOULD BE FOCUSING 404 00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:15,800 ON WHAT TO TELL ALLY RIGHT NOW. 405 00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:17,267 - OH, WE. 406 00:18:17,267 --> 00:18:19,800 YEAH, WE, BECAUSE WE SOLVE ALL THE PROBLEMS 407 00:18:19,800 --> 00:18:20,900 AROUND THIS HOUSE, RIGHT? 408 00:18:20,900 --> 00:18:22,367 LET'S FACE IT, RAY. 409 00:18:22,367 --> 00:18:25,567 WHEN YOU SAY "WE," YOU MEAN ME, THE "SMELLY TRAMP." 410 00:18:34,767 --> 00:18:37,233 - WHAT? 411 00:18:37,233 --> 00:18:38,800 - SMELLY TRAMP. 412 00:18:38,800 --> 00:18:41,400 THAT'S THE NICKNAME YOUR SON CAME UP WITH FOR ME. 413 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,733 - I DIDN'T SAY THAT AND YOU KNOW IT. 414 00:18:43,733 --> 00:18:47,733 IT'S "THMELLY TRAMP"! 415 00:18:47,733 --> 00:18:50,500 - OH, WELL, THAT'S CUTE. 416 00:18:51,867 --> 00:18:54,400 - HEY, MARIE, WHILE YOU'RE HOLDING THAT BIBLE, 417 00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:56,233 I'VE GOT A QUESTION FOR YOU. 418 00:18:56,233 --> 00:18:58,700 DID YOU EAT THE TWO MISSING CANNOLIS? 419 00:19:00,367 --> 00:19:03,467 - FRANK, I'M NOT GONNA LET YOU USE THE BIBLE LIKE THAT. 420 00:19:03,467 --> 00:19:05,200 - ANSWER ME, YES OR NO? 421 00:19:05,200 --> 00:19:07,033 - THIS IS RIDICULOUS! 422 00:19:07,033 --> 00:19:10,933 NO, I DIDN'T EAT THOSE TWO CANNOLIS. 423 00:19:10,933 --> 00:19:12,867 - DID YOU SEE WHAT SHE DID? 424 00:19:12,867 --> 00:19:14,367 PICK IT UP! 425 00:19:14,367 --> 00:19:16,500 PICK IT UP AND TELL US WHAT HAPPENED TO THOSE CANNOLIS! 426 00:19:16,500 --> 00:19:17,400 - OH, SHUT UP! 427 00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:21,200 - THOU SHALT NOT EAT THE CANNOLI! 428 00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:23,000 - NEVER MIND THE CANNOLIS, MA! 429 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,467 TAKE THIS BIBLE AND TELL ME THAT YOU DON'T SPEND MORE MONEY 430 00:19:25,467 --> 00:19:28,767 ON RAYMOND'S CHRISTMAS GIFTS THAN MINE! 431 00:19:28,767 --> 00:19:30,833 - THAT'S RIDICULOUS! 432 00:19:30,833 --> 00:19:31,900 - FIFTH GRADE. 433 00:19:31,900 --> 00:19:34,433 BIKE, SLIPPERS. TELL THE TRUTH! 434 00:19:34,433 --> 00:19:37,067 - THOSE SLIPPERS WERE VERY EXPENSIVE, ROBBIE! 435 00:19:37,067 --> 00:19:39,767 - TAKE THE BOOK! 436 00:19:39,767 --> 00:19:41,367 - ALL RIGHT! 437 00:19:41,367 --> 00:19:44,267 ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU FOR ALL THE ENLIGHTENMENT! 438 00:19:44,267 --> 00:19:45,900 - WAIT A MINUTE, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA TELL ALLY? 439 00:19:45,900 --> 00:19:48,033 - I DON'T KNOW, BUT THE ANSWER CAN'T BE DOWN HERE! 440 00:19:48,033 --> 00:19:50,200 - WELL, NEITHER CAN I! 441 00:19:52,067 --> 00:19:53,900 - LOOK, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA SAY EXACTLY, 442 00:19:53,900 --> 00:19:55,333 BUT HELP ME, ALL RIGHT? 443 00:19:55,333 --> 00:19:56,833 DON'T JUST STAND THERE AND MAKE YOUR FACES. 444 00:19:56,833 --> 00:19:59,800 - CAN WE JUST DO THIS? SHE'S WAITING. 445 00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:02,200 - AH, AH, AH, AH! 446 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:04,367 LEAVE THAT FACE IN THE HALL. 447 00:20:06,133 --> 00:20:07,133 [knocks on door] 448 00:20:07,133 --> 00:20:08,767 ALLY. 449 00:20:08,767 --> 00:20:10,333 HEY, SHE'S NOT IN HERE. 450 00:20:10,333 --> 00:20:12,100 - WHAT? 451 00:20:12,100 --> 00:20:15,233 [children laughing and playing] 452 00:20:17,767 --> 00:20:18,867 - ALLY. 453 00:20:18,867 --> 00:20:20,233 [Ally laughing] 454 00:20:20,233 --> 00:20:22,867 ALLY. - WHAT? 455 00:20:22,867 --> 00:20:26,000 - LISTEN, WE WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT YOUR QUESTION, OKAY? 456 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,667 - WHAT QUESTION? 457 00:20:28,667 --> 00:20:30,300 - ALLY, HONEY, COME ON. 458 00:20:30,300 --> 00:20:33,900 - [laughing] GET OFF ME. 459 00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:37,033 [children laughing and playing] 460 00:20:50,467 --> 00:20:53,133 - [laughing] GET OFF ME! 461 00:20:57,033 --> 00:20:58,267 [glass shattering] 462 00:20:58,267 --> 00:21:01,000 - HEY, GUYS! - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 463 00:21:05,067 --> 00:21:07,700 - IT'S REALLY SOMETHING SEEING THE KIDS LIKE THAT, HUH? 464 00:21:07,700 --> 00:21:09,533 - HMM, YEAH. 465 00:21:09,533 --> 00:21:13,033 I THINK WE LEARNED A LOT FROM THEM TODAY, BALONEY BOSOMS. 466 00:21:18,700 --> 00:21:20,000 - RAY. 467 00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,533 - WHAT? 468 00:21:21,533 --> 00:21:24,700 THERE'S SOMETHING TO BE SAID FOR CHILDLIKE INNOCENCE. 469 00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:26,067 - YEAH, OKAY, OKAY. 470 00:21:26,067 --> 00:21:29,000 - BUT I CAN SEE THAT YOU NEED SOME HELP. 471 00:21:31,100 --> 00:21:32,400 NOW MORE THAN EVER, 472 00:21:32,400 --> 00:21:34,600 YOU NEED A VISIT FROM DOPEY. 473 00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:36,000 - OH, GOD. 474 00:21:46,767 --> 00:21:49,367 NO, COME ON, NO, NO. DON'T, DON'T, DON'T. 475 00:21:49,367 --> 00:21:51,200 - I BEEN DOING THE READING. I KNOW WHAT TO DO NOW. 476 00:21:51,200 --> 00:21:52,633 - [squeals gleefully] 477 00:21:52,633 --> 00:21:53,767 STOP, NO, STOP!