1 00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:04,400 [children laughing] 2 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:06,167 - OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 3 00:00:06,167 --> 00:00:07,667 FINE, GUYS. YOU WIN. 4 00:00:07,667 --> 00:00:10,400 STAY UP FOREVER! 5 00:00:10,400 --> 00:00:11,833 I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. 6 00:00:11,833 --> 00:00:13,933 I'M NOT GONNA SING YOU ANY MORE LULLABIES. 7 00:00:13,933 --> 00:00:16,833 - OKAY. - OKAY. 8 00:00:16,833 --> 00:00:17,867 - OH, YEAH. FUNNY. 9 00:00:17,867 --> 00:00:19,067 HOW ABOUT I CALL SANTA, 10 00:00:19,067 --> 00:00:22,900 TELL HIM HOW FUNNY YOU GUYS ARE? 11 00:00:22,900 --> 00:00:24,100 SANTA CALLS THE EASTER BUNNY. 12 00:00:24,100 --> 00:00:25,133 HE CALLS THE TOOTH FAIRY. 13 00:00:25,133 --> 00:00:26,700 I DON'T GOT TO BUY SQUAT. 14 00:00:29,433 --> 00:00:30,733 - HI. 15 00:00:30,733 --> 00:00:31,733 - OH, MY GOD. 16 00:00:31,733 --> 00:00:32,967 HOW LONG WAS THIS MEETING? 17 00:00:32,967 --> 00:00:34,000 - OH, WELL, IT ENDED AT 8:00, 18 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:36,267 BUT I STAYED AFTER TO TALK. 19 00:00:36,267 --> 00:00:38,067 - YOU KNOW, HERE'S THE THING ABOUT THE TWINS. 20 00:00:38,067 --> 00:00:40,633 I KNOW THAT I'M SUPPOSED TO LOVE THEM, 21 00:00:40,633 --> 00:00:45,500 BUT WHY DO THEY MAKE IT SO FREAKIN' HARD? 22 00:00:45,500 --> 00:00:48,300 - LISTEN, LISTEN, RAY. IT WAS SUCH A GREAT MEETING. 23 00:00:48,300 --> 00:00:49,567 REMEMBER ALL THOSE IDEAS I HAD 24 00:00:49,567 --> 00:00:51,067 ABOUT FUNDRAISING AND THE READATHON? 25 00:00:51,067 --> 00:00:52,300 WELL, THIS IS AMAZING. 26 00:00:52,300 --> 00:00:53,700 I WAS TALKING, AND ALL THESE PEOPLE 27 00:00:53,700 --> 00:00:55,467 WERE REALLY INTERESTED IN WHAT I HAD TO SAY. 28 00:00:55,467 --> 00:00:56,800 - THE PROBLEM IS, THE TWINS-- 29 00:00:56,800 --> 00:00:58,233 THEY KNOW I HAVE TO LOVE THEM. 30 00:00:58,233 --> 00:01:00,267 THEY USE THAT LOVE AGAINST ME. 31 00:01:00,267 --> 00:01:02,467 WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT, I CAN'T ANYMORE. 32 00:01:02,467 --> 00:01:05,000 - RAY, LISTEN, ALL THESE PEOPLE WANT ME TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT. 33 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:06,767 - WHAT PEOPLE? 34 00:01:06,767 --> 00:01:08,133 - THE PEOPLE AT THE SCHOOL. 35 00:01:08,133 --> 00:01:09,367 THEY WANT ME TO RUN FOR PRESIDENT 36 00:01:09,367 --> 00:01:10,733 OF THE SCHOOL GOVERNING BOARD. 37 00:01:10,733 --> 00:01:12,033 ISN'T THAT FANTASTIC? 38 00:01:12,033 --> 00:01:14,300 - WHAT? 39 00:01:16,167 --> 00:01:18,833 - THERE IS AN ELECTION NEXT WEEK, 40 00:01:18,833 --> 00:01:21,233 AND SO FAR, BILL PARKER IS RUNNING UNOPPOSED. 41 00:01:21,233 --> 00:01:22,700 - PARKER. I HATE THAT PARKER. 42 00:01:22,700 --> 00:01:23,867 - WOULD YOU LISTEN? 43 00:01:23,867 --> 00:01:25,167 - HE STOLE OUR BABYSITTER. 44 00:01:25,167 --> 00:01:26,900 - I'M GONNA DO IT, RAY. 45 00:01:26,900 --> 00:01:30,633 - DO WHAT? 46 00:01:30,633 --> 00:01:32,667 - RUN FOR PRESIDENT. 47 00:01:32,667 --> 00:01:36,000 - PRESIDENT OF THE SCHOOL? - YEAH. 48 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:39,167 - BUT THAT'S, LIKE, A LOT OF MEETINGS AT NIGHT. 49 00:01:39,167 --> 00:01:41,567 - THIS IS THE PERFECT THING FOR ME. 50 00:01:41,567 --> 00:01:43,533 LOOK, I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS, 51 00:01:43,533 --> 00:01:45,067 SOMETHING TO GET INVOLVED IN, 52 00:01:45,067 --> 00:01:46,533 SOMETHING WHERE I CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE 53 00:01:46,533 --> 00:01:48,067 AND USE MY BRAIN AND HELP PEOPLE. 54 00:01:48,067 --> 00:01:49,700 LISTEN, I COULD MAKE A REALLY GOOD PRESIDENT. 55 00:01:49,700 --> 00:01:52,933 - YEAH, BUT YOU'RE ALREADY PRESIDENT OF THIS HOUSE. 56 00:01:52,933 --> 00:01:54,167 WE NEED YOU. 57 00:01:54,167 --> 00:01:58,467 ASK NOT WHAT YOUR HOUSE CAN DO FOR YOU. 58 00:01:58,467 --> 00:02:00,267 - TOMORROW NIGHT, I WANT YOU TO COME WITH ME. 59 00:02:00,267 --> 00:02:02,133 THERE'S A POTLUCK DINNER WHERE ALL THE PARENTS 60 00:02:02,133 --> 00:02:03,667 GET TO MEET THE PEOPLE RUNNING FOR OFFICE. 61 00:02:03,667 --> 00:02:07,300 - NO, NO, I'M NOT CRAZY ABOUT PEOPLE. 62 00:02:07,300 --> 00:02:10,133 - ARE YOU CRAZY ABOUT ME? 63 00:02:22,333 --> 00:02:25,433 - OH, BOY. HERE WE ARE. 64 00:02:26,933 --> 00:02:28,100 YOU KNOW, I'VE NEVER BEEN 65 00:02:28,100 --> 00:02:30,200 TO A POLITICAL CONVENTION BEFORE. 66 00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:31,800 WHERE ARE THE HOOKERS? 67 00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:32,833 - RAY. 68 00:02:32,833 --> 00:02:34,500 LISTEN, DO ME A FAVOR TONIGHT. 69 00:02:34,500 --> 00:02:36,433 TRY NOT TO LET EVERYTHING THAT'S IN HERE COME OUT HERE. 70 00:02:36,433 --> 00:02:37,633 COULD YOU DO THAT FOR ME? 71 00:02:37,633 --> 00:02:38,433 - YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. 72 00:02:38,433 --> 00:02:39,667 HEY, LET'S PRETEND 73 00:02:39,667 --> 00:02:41,200 I'M YOUR SECRET SERVICE AGENT MAN, 74 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:42,767 AND I'LL FOLLOW YOU AROUND LIKE THIS. 75 00:02:42,767 --> 00:02:44,400 SHE'S ON THE MOVE. 76 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:47,400 - I HAVE A BETTER IDEA. 77 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:49,233 WHY DON'T YOU PRETEND YOU'RE HERE UNDERCOVER 78 00:02:49,233 --> 00:02:51,133 AS AN ADULT? 79 00:02:52,333 --> 00:02:53,633 - ALL RIGHT. THAT'S IT. 80 00:02:53,633 --> 00:02:55,233 I'M CHANGING MY CODE NAME FOR YOU. 81 00:02:55,233 --> 00:02:56,967 IT USED TO BE "HOT MAMA." 82 00:02:56,967 --> 00:02:58,733 YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT IS NOW? - NO. 83 00:02:58,733 --> 00:03:00,733 - "GROUCHO." 84 00:03:00,733 --> 00:03:01,800 - HELLO, DEBRA. 85 00:03:01,800 --> 00:03:03,200 - HI, BILL. 86 00:03:03,200 --> 00:03:04,500 - BARONE. 87 00:03:04,500 --> 00:03:06,533 - PARKER. 88 00:03:06,533 --> 00:03:07,333 MARY. 89 00:03:07,333 --> 00:03:10,100 - CARRIE. - CARRIE. 90 00:03:10,100 --> 00:03:12,133 - WHAT DID YOU BRING, DEBRA? 91 00:03:12,133 --> 00:03:14,100 - OH, JUST SOME VEGGIES AND ONION DIP. 92 00:03:14,100 --> 00:03:15,100 HOW ABOUT YOU? 93 00:03:15,100 --> 00:03:17,133 - BEEF TENDERLOIN. 94 00:03:17,133 --> 00:03:19,667 - OH! WOW, HUH? 95 00:03:19,667 --> 00:03:20,733 - YEAH, PRETTY FANCY. 96 00:03:20,733 --> 00:03:22,033 - YEAH. 97 00:03:22,033 --> 00:03:23,633 THANKS TO MY LOVELY WIFE. - YEAH. 98 00:03:23,633 --> 00:03:25,100 I'LL BE GETTING IN ON SOME OF THAT. 99 00:03:25,100 --> 00:03:27,333 THE BEEF, I MEAN. 100 00:03:32,533 --> 00:03:33,467 - WELL... 101 00:03:35,733 --> 00:03:37,067 GOOD LUCK, AND, UH, 102 00:03:37,067 --> 00:03:39,167 YOU KNOW, MAY THE BEST MAN OR WOMAN WIN. 103 00:03:39,167 --> 00:03:40,700 - NO DIRTY TRICKS. 104 00:03:40,700 --> 00:03:42,767 [laughter] 105 00:03:42,767 --> 00:03:45,133 - [laughs manically] 106 00:03:46,333 --> 00:03:48,100 - HEY, BUDDY. HOW YA DOING? 107 00:03:48,100 --> 00:03:49,933 - I DON'T HAVE A CHANCE. 108 00:03:49,933 --> 00:03:51,767 - WHAT, AGAINST PARKER? - YEAH. 109 00:03:51,767 --> 00:03:53,167 - AH, I DON'T KNOW. 110 00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:55,200 THAT GUY-- HE'S ALL WITH THE BLOND HAIR 111 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:56,600 AND THE TEETH. 112 00:03:56,600 --> 00:03:58,200 YOU KNOW, WE GET IT, ALL RIGHT? 113 00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:00,633 WE GOT IT. 114 00:04:00,633 --> 00:04:02,033 - LOOK AT YOU. 115 00:04:02,033 --> 00:04:03,433 DID YOU EVEN SHAVE TODAY? 116 00:04:03,433 --> 00:04:05,133 - WHAT? YEAH, THIS MORNING. 117 00:04:05,133 --> 00:04:06,700 - YOU'RE ALL STUBBLY. 118 00:04:06,700 --> 00:04:08,033 COME OVER HERE. - WHAT? 119 00:04:08,033 --> 00:04:09,300 - LOOK AT YOUR SHIRT. TUCK THIS IN. 120 00:04:09,300 --> 00:04:12,000 - WHAT? OW! OW! OW! OW! WHAT? 121 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:13,500 - GOD. - COME ON. 122 00:04:13,500 --> 00:04:14,467 WHY? 123 00:04:14,467 --> 00:04:15,967 - YOUR APPEARANCE REFLECTS ON ME. 124 00:04:15,967 --> 00:04:17,567 LOOK HOW CARRIE PARKER IS DRESSED. 125 00:04:17,567 --> 00:04:22,233 - SORRY, I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS GONNA BE FIRST LADY. 126 00:04:22,233 --> 00:04:25,633 - HERE, JUST TAKE THIS OVER TO THE BUFFET TABLE, OKAY? 127 00:04:25,633 --> 00:04:26,767 - WHERE YOU GOING? 128 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:29,733 - I'M GONNA WORK THE ROOM BY MYSELF. 129 00:04:29,733 --> 00:04:30,867 HI, MAUREEN. 130 00:04:30,867 --> 00:04:33,000 STAND UP STRAIGHT. 131 00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:34,133 - GROUCHO. 132 00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:37,800 HEY, HOW YOU DOING? 133 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:39,300 ROCK THE VOTE. 134 00:04:42,567 --> 00:04:44,633 HEY, ANYBODY SEE THE TENDERLOIN? 135 00:04:44,633 --> 00:04:45,900 - IT'S ALL GONE. 136 00:04:45,900 --> 00:04:47,100 - WHAT? 137 00:04:47,100 --> 00:04:48,167 ALREADY? 138 00:04:48,167 --> 00:04:50,500 OH, THESE PEOPLE ARE ANIMALS. 139 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,800 LOOK AT THIS. CRACKERS. 140 00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:55,000 - YEAH. 141 00:04:56,133 --> 00:04:57,867 - WHAT'S THIS? - TABBOULEH. 142 00:04:57,867 --> 00:05:00,400 - I GOT TO TELL YOU, IF I SAW THIS ON THE FLOOR, 143 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,400 I'D RUB MY DOG'S NOSE IN IT. 144 00:05:04,633 --> 00:05:07,000 - I MADE THE TABBOULEH. 145 00:05:09,167 --> 00:05:11,100 - HI. I'M BILL PARKER. 146 00:05:20,667 --> 00:05:22,433 I HATE THIS. 147 00:05:22,433 --> 00:05:24,300 - HEY, I'M WITH YOU. 148 00:05:24,300 --> 00:05:26,267 THESE POTLUCKS-- THEY'RE ALWAYS LAME. 149 00:05:26,267 --> 00:05:27,933 THAT'S WHY WHEN I SEE THE ONE GOOD THING, 150 00:05:27,933 --> 00:05:29,133 I STOCK UP. 151 00:05:29,133 --> 00:05:30,333 - WHAT'S THAT, THE TENDERLOIN? 152 00:05:30,333 --> 00:05:32,567 - YOU KNOW IT. - MM-HMM. 153 00:05:32,567 --> 00:05:33,767 - YOU WANT A BITE? 154 00:05:33,767 --> 00:05:35,600 - NO. YEAH. THAT'S NICE OF YOU, THOUGH. 155 00:05:35,600 --> 00:05:37,833 THANK YOU. 156 00:05:37,833 --> 00:05:39,700 SO WHO YOU THINK'S GONNA BE PRESIDENT? 157 00:05:39,700 --> 00:05:41,267 - OH, IT'S A TOSS-UP. 158 00:05:41,267 --> 00:05:42,733 BILL PARKER SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD, 159 00:05:42,733 --> 00:05:45,067 BUT I'LL PROBABLY VOTE FOR THAT DEBRA BARONE. 160 00:05:45,067 --> 00:05:46,500 - OH, YEAH? WHY IS THAT? 161 00:05:46,500 --> 00:05:48,367 - SHE'S GOT A NICE LITTLE CABOOSE. 162 00:05:57,000 --> 00:06:00,133 - ALL RIGHT, ATTENTION, EVERYBODY. 163 00:06:00,133 --> 00:06:01,800 WOULD YOU ALL GATHER OVER HERE, PLEASE? 164 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:03,900 WE'D LIKE TO GET STARTED. 165 00:06:03,900 --> 00:06:06,700 - TENDERLOIN. EXCELLENT. 166 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:11,800 - UH, EXCUSE ME. 167 00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:13,667 EXCUSE ME. CAN WE HAVE EVERYBODY, PLEASE? 168 00:06:19,633 --> 00:06:21,467 EVERYONE? 169 00:07:08,733 --> 00:07:11,900 - DADDY! - GO TO SLEEP! 170 00:07:11,900 --> 00:07:14,067 - I WANT WATER! 171 00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:15,733 - NO! NO! 172 00:07:15,733 --> 00:07:18,000 FIRST IT'S WATER, THEN, "READ ME A STORY," 173 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:19,400 THEN I FALL ASLEEP UP THERE, 174 00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:21,133 AND YOU'RE DOWN HERE WATCHING WRESTLING! 175 00:07:21,133 --> 00:07:23,167 NO! NO WATER! 176 00:07:23,167 --> 00:07:25,800 - YES! YES! - ALL RIGHT! 177 00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:27,033 - WHAT--WHAT HAPPENED? 178 00:07:27,033 --> 00:07:29,467 - THEY PULLED IT OUT! THE KNICKS WON! 179 00:07:29,467 --> 00:07:30,600 THE KNICKS WON! 180 00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:32,500 - INCREDIBLE GAME! 181 00:07:32,500 --> 00:07:35,300 KNICKS WERE DOWN 14 WITH 3 MINUTES LEFT. 182 00:07:35,300 --> 00:07:37,167 - AND THEN SPREWELL MAKES A GAME-WINNING SHOT 183 00:07:37,167 --> 00:07:38,433 FROM 30 FEET OUT AT THE BUZZER. 184 00:07:38,433 --> 00:07:40,000 IT WAS THE BEST GAME OF THE YEAR. 185 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,133 - OH, MAN! 186 00:07:41,133 --> 00:07:43,733 - AND YOU MISSED IT. 187 00:07:45,700 --> 00:07:47,633 - COME ON! 188 00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:48,633 - TOUGH BREAK, CUBBY. 189 00:07:48,633 --> 00:07:51,000 [laughs] 190 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:53,033 - HELLO, RAYMOND. 191 00:07:53,033 --> 00:07:54,333 - MA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 192 00:07:54,333 --> 00:07:55,800 - I'M TAKING WATER TO THE CHILDREN. 193 00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:58,300 - I SAID NO MORE WATER! 194 00:07:58,300 --> 00:07:59,800 - ALL RIGHT, RAYMOND. 195 00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:03,967 BUT I WOULD NEVER DENY MY CHILDREN WATER. 196 00:08:03,967 --> 00:08:05,900 - WELL, ROBERT, I GUESS THAT EXPLAINS 197 00:08:05,900 --> 00:08:07,767 YOUR BED-WETTING PROBLEM. 198 00:08:14,267 --> 00:08:16,400 - YOU KNOW, RAYMOND, TO TELL THE TRUTH, 199 00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:18,367 DEBRA SHOULD HAVE PUT THEM TO BED BEFORE SHE LEFT. 200 00:08:18,367 --> 00:08:19,633 - YEAH, WELL, TELL HER THAT. 201 00:08:19,633 --> 00:08:23,000 NO, NO, NO, DON'T TELL HER THAT. 202 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:24,433 - WHEN IS SHE GETTING HOME? 203 00:08:24,433 --> 00:08:25,867 - WHEN THEY COUNT ALL THE VOTES. 204 00:08:25,867 --> 00:08:27,400 - I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU'RE LETTING HER 205 00:08:27,400 --> 00:08:29,033 WASTE HER TIME WITH THIS CRAP. 206 00:08:29,033 --> 00:08:31,067 - NO, NO, NO. DEBRA'S RIGHT. 207 00:08:31,067 --> 00:08:32,700 SHE SAID IT'S IMPORTANT 208 00:08:32,700 --> 00:08:35,133 FOR PARENTS TO GET INVOLVED IN THEIR KIDS' EDUCATION. 209 00:08:35,133 --> 00:08:38,567 BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. 210 00:08:38,567 --> 00:08:41,900 - WE NEVER GOT INVOLVED IN YOUR EDUCATION. 211 00:08:41,900 --> 00:08:43,533 - THAT'S RIGHT. 212 00:08:43,533 --> 00:08:46,700 PA DIDN'T GO IN FOR ALL THAT FANCY BOOK-LEARNIN'. 213 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:54,667 - WHAT? WHAT DID I PAY TAXES FOR? 214 00:08:54,667 --> 00:08:55,700 YOU THINK I HAD TIME 215 00:08:55,700 --> 00:08:57,433 TO TELL YOU WHAT TWO PLUS TWO IS? 216 00:08:57,433 --> 00:08:59,100 - WELL, MAYBE IF YOU TOOK MORE INTEREST, 217 00:08:59,100 --> 00:09:00,867 WHO KNOWS HOW FAR I COULD HAVE GONE? 218 00:09:00,867 --> 00:09:03,133 - FOUR! 219 00:09:04,667 --> 00:09:07,100 TWO PLUS TWO IS FOUR! 220 00:09:07,100 --> 00:09:09,500 GO GET 'EM, TIGER! 221 00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:15,367 - WELL, I THINK IT'S GREAT, WHAT DEBRA'S DOING. 222 00:09:15,367 --> 00:09:17,067 - YOU THINK EVERYTHING SHE DOES IS GREAT. 223 00:09:17,067 --> 00:09:18,133 - NOT EVERYTHING. 224 00:09:18,133 --> 00:09:19,767 I THINK SHE'S A BAD MARRIER. 225 00:09:21,333 --> 00:09:23,400 - HI. - HERE SHE IS! 226 00:09:23,400 --> 00:09:25,167 [hums "Hail to the Chief"] 227 00:09:25,167 --> 00:09:26,167 - I LOST. 228 00:09:26,167 --> 00:09:29,900 - [slows humming] 229 00:09:29,900 --> 00:09:32,467 - NO, THAT'S THE WAY IT GOES. 230 00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:17,600 - MY CELL PHONE WAS IN MY POCKET. 231 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:28,033 - LOST? - YUP. 232 00:10:28,033 --> 00:10:29,300 BILL PARKER IS THE NEW 233 00:10:29,300 --> 00:10:30,867 OUR LADY OF FAITH ELEMENTARY SCHOOL 234 00:10:30,867 --> 00:10:32,567 GOVERNING BOARD PRESIDENT. 235 00:10:32,567 --> 00:10:35,233 - OH, WOW, DEB, I'M SORRY. THAT STINKS. 236 00:10:35,233 --> 00:10:37,633 - STINKS? IT'S AN OUTRAGE. 237 00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,333 YOU WERE BORN TO BE 238 00:10:40,333 --> 00:10:42,000 THE OUR LADY OF FAITH ELEMENTARY SCHOOL 239 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:43,500 GOVERNING BOARD PRESIDENT. 240 00:10:44,633 --> 00:10:46,367 - I DON'T KNOW. 241 00:10:46,367 --> 00:10:48,267 MAYBE I JUST HAD TOO MANY IDEAS. 242 00:10:48,267 --> 00:10:50,800 MAYBE I TALKED TOO MUCH. DID I COME OFF PUSHY? 243 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:51,867 - NO. 244 00:10:51,867 --> 00:10:53,200 COME ON, DEB. 245 00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:55,200 PARKER BOUGHT THAT WHOLE ELECTION, HUH? 246 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:56,500 PUTTING OUT THE TENDERLOIN 247 00:10:56,500 --> 00:10:59,200 AND THE HORSERADISH AND THE ROLLS. 248 00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:00,800 HOW COULD YOU COMPETE WITH THAT? 249 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:01,867 - HMM. 250 00:11:01,867 --> 00:11:04,767 THAT'S TOUGH TO BEAT. 251 00:11:04,767 --> 00:11:07,067 - FOOD'S IMPORTANT, DEAR. 252 00:11:07,067 --> 00:11:10,000 IF YOU HAD ONLY COME TO ME. 253 00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:11,100 - COME ON. 254 00:11:11,100 --> 00:11:12,433 THAT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT. 255 00:11:12,433 --> 00:11:15,200 - DON'T KID YOURSELF, SWEETHEART. 256 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:17,900 THIS IS POLITICS. 257 00:11:17,900 --> 00:11:19,533 YOU GOT TO PLAY ROUGH. 258 00:11:19,533 --> 00:11:22,533 HE PUTS OUT TENDERLOIN; YOU PUT OUT PRIME RIB. 259 00:11:24,033 --> 00:11:27,167 HE PUTS OUT PRIME RIB; YOU GO LOBSTER. 260 00:11:27,167 --> 00:11:28,367 HE GOES LOBSTER; 261 00:11:28,367 --> 00:11:30,767 YOU START THE RUMOR HE WEARS A BRA. 262 00:11:34,033 --> 00:11:35,500 - YEAH, I LIKE THAT BRA THING. 263 00:11:35,500 --> 00:11:37,300 I'LL SAY I SAW HIM IN THE LINGERIE DEPARTMENT 264 00:11:37,300 --> 00:11:40,133 GOING INTO THE FITTING ROOM. 265 00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:42,100 - WHY DON'T YOU DEMAND A RECOUNT? 266 00:11:42,100 --> 00:11:43,433 MAYBE THERE WAS SOME FUNNY BUSINESS 267 00:11:43,433 --> 00:11:44,433 GOING ON WITH THE BALLOTS. 268 00:11:44,433 --> 00:11:46,433 - NO. - THAT GOES ON. 269 00:11:46,433 --> 00:11:48,433 - MRS. WENDELL, THE LIBRARIAN-- SHE WAS KEEPING 270 00:11:48,433 --> 00:11:50,800 A PRETTY CLOSE WATCH ON THE SHOEBOXES. 271 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:51,900 - OH, MRS. WENDELL. 272 00:11:51,900 --> 00:11:53,267 I REMEMBER HER. 273 00:11:53,267 --> 00:11:56,333 "THE BOOKS ARE LATE! THE BOOKS ARE LATE!" 274 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:05,400 - YOU KNOW, I THINK WHAT'S REALLY BUGGING ME IS, 275 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,267 I THOUGHT I HAD THE SUPPORT. 276 00:12:07,267 --> 00:12:09,233 I THOUGHT PEOPLE LIKED ME. 277 00:12:09,233 --> 00:12:12,300 - PEOPLE CAN FOOL YOU. 278 00:12:15,833 --> 00:12:18,267 - COME ON, I MEAN, JUST BECAUSE YOU LOST 279 00:12:18,267 --> 00:12:20,167 DOESN'T MEAN PEOPLE DON'T LIKE YOU, RIGHT? 280 00:12:20,167 --> 00:12:21,367 I'M SURE YOU GOT A LOT OF VOTES. 281 00:12:21,367 --> 00:12:23,000 - YEAH, WELL, IT WAS VERY CLOSE. 282 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:24,167 - SURE. 283 00:12:24,167 --> 00:12:25,733 BY THE WAY, HOW CLOSE WAS IT? 284 00:12:25,733 --> 00:12:28,500 - SIX VOTES. - SEE? 285 00:12:28,500 --> 00:12:32,067 SO IT'S NOT LIKE YOU LOST BY ONE VOTE. 286 00:12:32,067 --> 00:12:33,733 - WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 287 00:12:33,733 --> 00:12:35,133 - WHAT? NO, NOTHING. 288 00:12:35,133 --> 00:12:36,867 - WAIT, YOU THINK IT'S GOOD THAT I LOST 289 00:12:36,867 --> 00:12:38,500 BY MORE THAN ONE VOTE? 290 00:12:38,500 --> 00:12:40,267 - NO. 291 00:12:40,267 --> 00:12:41,467 I MEAN, WELL, KIND OF. 292 00:12:41,467 --> 00:12:43,000 ONLY BECAUSE IF YOU LOST BY ONE VOTE, 293 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:45,000 THEN THAT WOULD BE HEARTBREAKING. 294 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,567 - YES, IT WOULD BE HEARTBREAKING. 295 00:12:54,767 --> 00:12:56,733 RAY, WHO DID YOU VOTE FOR? 296 00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:08,100 RAY? - WHAT? 297 00:13:08,100 --> 00:13:09,833 WHAT? 298 00:13:09,833 --> 00:13:11,500 - WHO DID YOU VOTE FOR? 299 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,600 - [sighs] 300 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,267 - OH, BOY. 301 00:13:25,667 --> 00:13:26,733 - WE SHOULD GO. 302 00:13:26,733 --> 00:13:28,267 - I'M RIGHT BEHIND YOU. 303 00:13:28,267 --> 00:13:29,833 - WHAT? WHAT? WHERE YOU GOING? 304 00:13:29,833 --> 00:13:31,800 - IT'S NONE OF OUR BUSINESS. - WHAT? SINCE WHEN? 305 00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,467 YOU THINK EVERYTHING'S YOUR BUSINESS. 306 00:13:33,467 --> 00:13:35,233 - USUALLY I'D STAY AND DEFEND YOU, 307 00:13:35,233 --> 00:13:37,700 BUT VOTING AGAINST YOUR WIFE? 308 00:13:37,700 --> 00:13:39,367 - YOU'RE A DEAD MAN. 309 00:13:44,500 --> 00:13:48,700 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, BUT, DEB, IF YOU WANT TO TALK... 310 00:13:48,700 --> 00:13:49,733 AND YOU... 311 00:14:13,867 --> 00:14:16,733 - YOU KNOW, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO ASK PEOPLE 312 00:14:16,733 --> 00:14:18,200 WHO THEY VOTE FOR. 313 00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:20,833 THAT'S WHY WE FOLDED OUR VOTES 314 00:14:20,833 --> 00:14:24,300 AND PUT IT IN THE SHOEBOX WITH THE TAPE AROUND IT 315 00:14:24,300 --> 00:14:25,533 AND THEY LOCKED IT UP 316 00:14:25,533 --> 00:14:27,633 IN THE SCHOOL CAFE-GYM-A-TORIUM... 317 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:35,333 AS OUR FOREFATHERS DID. 318 00:14:40,267 --> 00:14:42,233 - HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME? 319 00:14:42,233 --> 00:14:44,200 - WELL, I JUST LOOKED 320 00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:46,067 AT WHAT BOTH CANDIDATES BROUGHT TO THE TABLE, 321 00:14:46,067 --> 00:14:47,433 AND I JUST THOUGHT THAT BILL PARKER-- 322 00:14:47,433 --> 00:14:50,033 - BILL PARKER? YOU HATE BILL PARKER! 323 00:14:50,033 --> 00:14:51,833 - I HATE BILL PARKER THE MAN, 324 00:14:51,833 --> 00:14:54,900 BUT I JUST THOUGHT THAT BILL PARKER THE CANDIDATE 325 00:14:54,900 --> 00:14:56,100 HAD AN INTERESTING PLATFORM. 326 00:14:56,100 --> 00:14:58,233 - OH, SHUT UP. I'M YOUR WIFE. 327 00:14:58,233 --> 00:15:01,000 I DON'T CARE IF MY PLATFORM WAS...ANTI-PUPPY. 328 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,433 YOU HAVE TO VOTE FOR ME. 329 00:15:02,433 --> 00:15:04,067 - BUT DOESN'T IT SAY IN THE CONSTITUTION-- 330 00:15:04,067 --> 00:15:05,067 - I DON'T CARE WHAT IT SAYS 331 00:15:05,067 --> 00:15:06,133 IN THE CONSTITUTION. 332 00:15:06,133 --> 00:15:07,467 YOU VOTE FOR YOUR WIFE! 333 00:15:07,467 --> 00:15:09,033 AND SINCE WHEN DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT SAYS 334 00:15:09,033 --> 00:15:11,000 IN THE CONSTITUTION? 335 00:15:13,567 --> 00:15:16,533 - I'M NOT GONNA STAND HERE AND LET YOU BADMOUTH AMERICA. 336 00:15:23,367 --> 00:15:25,333 - YOU VOTED AGAINST ME. 337 00:15:25,333 --> 00:15:27,667 - I DIDN'T VOTE AGAINST YOU. 338 00:15:27,667 --> 00:15:30,433 I LOVE YOU. 339 00:15:30,433 --> 00:15:33,700 I JUST VOTED NOT FOR YOU. 340 00:15:33,700 --> 00:15:34,933 I WAS PROTECTING YOU. 341 00:15:34,933 --> 00:15:36,267 - PROTECTING ME FROM WHAT? 342 00:15:36,267 --> 00:15:37,667 - FROM POLITICAL BACKSTABBING. 343 00:15:37,667 --> 00:15:38,733 YOU DON'T REALIZE 344 00:15:38,733 --> 00:15:40,300 THAT WHEN YOU'RE A POLITICAL FIGURE, 345 00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:41,567 YOU'RE AT THE MERCY OF THE PEOPLE, 346 00:15:41,567 --> 00:15:43,100 AND THE PEOPLE-- THEY'RE HORRIBLE. 347 00:15:43,100 --> 00:15:45,100 THEY STARE AT YOUR CABOOSE. 348 00:15:46,133 --> 00:15:48,433 - YOU WERE AGAINST THIS ALL ALONG. 349 00:15:48,433 --> 00:15:50,567 YOU CAN'T SUPPORT ME FOR ONE MINUTE! 350 00:15:50,567 --> 00:15:52,967 - OH, COME ON. I SUPPORT YOU. 351 00:15:52,967 --> 00:15:54,500 WHEN YOU HAD 15 MEETINGS THIS WEEK, 352 00:15:54,500 --> 00:15:56,067 WHO TOOK CARE OF THE KIDS, HUH? 353 00:15:56,067 --> 00:15:58,667 PUTTING THEM TO BED AND RUNNING GALLONS OF WATER UPSTAIRS 354 00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:00,367 LIKE GUNGA DIN? 355 00:16:00,367 --> 00:16:02,100 - FIRST OF ALL, IT WAS TWO MEETINGS, 356 00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:03,600 AND YOU COMPLAINED THE WHOLE TIME. 357 00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,333 WE ALL KNOW WHY YOU DIDN'T VOTE FOR ME, RAY. 358 00:16:05,333 --> 00:16:06,900 BECAUSE YOU WERE AFRAID THAT IF I WIN, 359 00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:08,233 I MIGHT GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE 360 00:16:08,233 --> 00:16:09,600 AND YOU MIGHT HAVE TO GET OFF YOUR BUTT 361 00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:11,167 ONCE IN A WHILE AND DO SOMETHING. 362 00:16:11,167 --> 00:16:12,400 YOU WANT ME LOCKED IN THIS HOUSE. 363 00:16:12,400 --> 00:16:14,133 YOUR VOTE WAS A VOTE FOR SLAVERY! 364 00:16:22,333 --> 00:16:25,633 - I HAVE ALWAYS SPOKEN OUT AGAINST SLAVERY. 365 00:16:25,633 --> 00:16:27,333 - NOT IN THIS HOUSE. NOT IN THIS MARRIAGE. 366 00:16:27,333 --> 00:16:28,767 YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT A MARRIAGE IS. 367 00:16:28,767 --> 00:16:30,833 A MARRIAGE IS TWO PEOPLE SUPPORTING EACH OTHER 368 00:16:30,833 --> 00:16:32,267 NO MATTER WHAT, 369 00:16:32,267 --> 00:16:34,267 BEING THERE FOR EACH OTHER FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE, 370 00:16:34,267 --> 00:16:35,567 STANDING NEXT TO EACH OTHER, 371 00:16:35,567 --> 00:16:37,367 STANDING UP FOR EACH OTHER NO MATTER WHAT. 372 00:16:37,367 --> 00:16:39,467 BUT YOU DON'T GET THAT, AND THAT'S WHY AT THAT POTLUCK, 373 00:16:39,467 --> 00:16:41,533 I HAD TO TELL PEOPLE I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU. 374 00:16:41,533 --> 00:16:42,733 - WHAT? 375 00:16:42,733 --> 00:16:44,367 YOU TOLD PEOPLE YOU DON'T KNOW ME? 376 00:16:44,367 --> 00:16:46,533 - OF COURSE. YOU WERE ACTING LIKE A GOOFBALL. 377 00:16:46,533 --> 00:16:48,500 - I DON'T CARE WHAT I WAS DOING. 378 00:16:48,500 --> 00:16:50,533 YOU DENIED KNOWING ME AT THE POTLUCK? 379 00:16:50,533 --> 00:16:54,333 - YOU WERE STUFFING YOUR PANTS WITH FOOD. 380 00:16:56,100 --> 00:16:57,900 - I'M YOUR HUSBAND. 381 00:16:57,900 --> 00:17:01,467 YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO SUPPORT ME NO MATTER WHAT'S IN MY PANTS. 382 00:17:10,700 --> 00:17:13,500 HUH, DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY, "PARTNERS FOR BETTER OR WORSE, 383 00:17:13,500 --> 00:17:14,800 STANDING UP ON EACH OTHER"-- 384 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:16,100 - OH, DON'T EVEN. 385 00:17:16,100 --> 00:17:17,367 IT'S NOT THE SAME THING, AND YOU KNOW IT. 386 00:17:17,367 --> 00:17:18,467 YOU EMBARRASSED ME. 387 00:17:18,467 --> 00:17:19,900 - I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING DIFFERENT 388 00:17:19,900 --> 00:17:20,900 AT THAT POTLUCK THING 389 00:17:20,900 --> 00:17:22,200 THAT I DON'T DO 390 00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:24,800 AT ANY OTHER PUBLIC PLACE YOU DRAG ME TO. 391 00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:28,567 I HAVE ALWAYS LIKED BEEF! 392 00:17:28,567 --> 00:17:31,200 AND I HAVE ALWAYS TRIED TO GET AS MUCH OF IT AS I COULD 393 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:33,133 AT ANY FUNCTION! 394 00:17:34,867 --> 00:17:36,267 BUT EVEN BEFORE THAT HAPPENED, 395 00:17:36,267 --> 00:17:38,500 YOU MADE IT VERY CLEAR THAT I EMBARRASS YOU-- 396 00:17:38,500 --> 00:17:40,400 GETTING UP ON ME ABOUT SHAVING 397 00:17:40,400 --> 00:17:41,900 AND TELLING ME TO STAND UP STRAIGHT 398 00:17:41,900 --> 00:17:43,600 AND TUCK IN MY SHIRT, 399 00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:46,600 LIKE--LIKE I WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU. 400 00:17:48,133 --> 00:17:51,233 AND NOW I FIND OUT YOU ACTUALLY TOLD PEOPLE 401 00:17:51,233 --> 00:17:53,267 THAT YOU DON'T KNOW ME? 402 00:17:57,933 --> 00:18:00,167 I WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO YOU. 403 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:11,767 - I'M SORRY. 404 00:18:15,700 --> 00:18:16,600 - I'M SORRY, TOO. 405 00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:19,667 I-I SHOULD HAVE VOTED FOR YOU. 406 00:18:19,667 --> 00:18:24,733 - AND I SHOULD HAVE TOLD PEOPLE I KNOW YOU. 407 00:18:34,367 --> 00:18:36,967 - I WAS ACTING JERKY. 408 00:18:36,967 --> 00:18:39,367 - YEAH, I KNOW I-- 409 00:18:39,367 --> 00:18:42,967 I GUESS I JUST GOT CARRIED AWAY, YOU KNOW, 410 00:18:42,967 --> 00:18:44,333 WITH THE POSSIBILITY OF BEING 411 00:18:44,333 --> 00:18:46,333 THE OUR LADY OF FAITH ELEMENTARY SCHOOL 412 00:18:46,333 --> 00:18:49,467 GOVERNING BOARD PRESIDENT. 413 00:18:49,467 --> 00:18:50,500 - WELL, LISTEN. 414 00:18:50,500 --> 00:18:54,233 ALL THAT POWER-- IT'S LIKE A DRUG. 415 00:19:00,533 --> 00:19:01,833 - YOU WANT SOMETHING TO EAT? 416 00:19:01,833 --> 00:19:03,067 - YEAH, YEAH. WHAT DO YOU GOT? 417 00:19:03,067 --> 00:19:05,500 - I GOT SOME VEGGIES AND DIP LEFT. 418 00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:06,667 - OH. 419 00:19:06,667 --> 00:19:08,433 YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD GO GOOD WITH THAT? 420 00:19:08,433 --> 00:19:09,700 TABBOULEH. 421 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:14,067 GOT ANY COOKIES? 422 00:19:14,067 --> 00:19:15,567 - COOKIES. I GOT COOKIES. 423 00:19:15,567 --> 00:19:18,500 [phone rings] 424 00:19:19,767 --> 00:19:21,333 - HELLO. 425 00:19:21,333 --> 00:19:23,200 YEAH, SHE'S RIGHT HERE. 426 00:19:24,367 --> 00:19:26,600 IT'S THE PRESIDENT. 427 00:19:30,167 --> 00:19:31,200 - HI, BILL. 428 00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:32,267 - WHAT, DID HE CALL TO GLOAT? 429 00:19:32,267 --> 00:19:34,433 YOU TELL HIM WE'RE ONTO HIM. 430 00:19:36,033 --> 00:19:37,233 - MM-HMM. 431 00:19:37,233 --> 00:19:40,300 YEAH, WELL, NO, CONGRATULATIONS. 432 00:19:40,300 --> 00:19:43,400 REALLY? OH! 433 00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:45,033 WELL, THAT'S SO NICE OF YOU TO SAY. 434 00:19:45,033 --> 00:19:46,867 YES, I WOULD LOVE TO HELP YOU. 435 00:19:46,867 --> 00:19:48,633 - WHAT? - YEAH. 436 00:19:48,633 --> 00:19:51,000 YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT? MY NIGHTS ARE MOSTLY FREE. 437 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,500 - WHAT? NO, THEY'RE NOT! 438 00:19:52,500 --> 00:19:53,567 - YOU KNOW WHAT? 439 00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:55,400 THE ONE THING I REALLY WANTED TO DO 440 00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:57,300 WAS GET THOSE TEACHERS' LUNCHEONS ORGANIZED. 441 00:19:57,300 --> 00:19:59,200 - HANG UP THE PHONE. HE'S TRYING TO TEAR US APART. 442 00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:00,867 - AND YOU KNOW WHAT? 443 00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:03,967 - MOMMY, I HAD AN ACCIDENT. 444 00:20:03,967 --> 00:20:05,567 - ACCIDENT. ACCIDENT. 445 00:20:07,300 --> 00:20:09,467 MOMMY'S ON THE PHONE. 446 00:20:09,467 --> 00:20:11,567 YOU WANT TO WAIT FOR MOMMY? 447 00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:14,167 MOMMY, HE-- 448 00:20:17,833 --> 00:20:19,600 ALL RIGHT. I'LL DO IT. 449 00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:21,367 - BUT I WANT MOMMY. 450 00:20:21,367 --> 00:20:24,000 - DON'T BLAME ME. I VOTED FOR PARKER. 451 00:20:32,767 --> 00:20:35,667 - SO I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT I'M LOOKING FORWARD 452 00:20:35,667 --> 00:20:38,133 TO A SUCCESSFUL YEAR OF WORKING TOGETHER, 453 00:20:38,133 --> 00:20:40,367 BUT I CAN ONLY DO IT WITH YOUR HELP. 454 00:20:43,500 --> 00:20:46,167 I ONLY HOPE THAT I'M WORTHY 455 00:20:46,167 --> 00:20:47,533 OF THE FAITH THAT YOU'VE SHOWN IN ME, 456 00:20:47,533 --> 00:20:50,700 BECAUSE AT OUR LADY OF FAITH, 457 00:20:50,700 --> 00:20:52,100 IT IS ALL ABOUT FAITH-- 458 00:20:52,100 --> 00:20:54,200 FAITH IN OUR CHILDREN, 459 00:20:54,200 --> 00:20:57,300 FAITH IN OUR FACULTY, FAITH IN EACH OTHER. 460 00:20:57,300 --> 00:20:59,133 - [whispers] FAITH THAT YOU WEAR A BRA, BUDDY. 461 00:20:59,133 --> 00:21:01,700 - [laughing] YEAH. 462 00:21:01,700 --> 00:21:04,167 - [mumbling]