1 00:00:00,900 --> 00:00:02,200 - [giggling] 2 00:00:02,200 --> 00:00:04,033 - NO, NOW HERE'S THE SWEETEST THING. 3 00:00:04,033 --> 00:00:05,567 EVERY NIGHT SINCE OUR WEDDING, 4 00:00:05,567 --> 00:00:07,167 ROBERT GIVES ME A LITTLE MASSAGE. 5 00:00:07,167 --> 00:00:09,067 - OH, WOW. YOU ARE SO LUCKY. 6 00:00:09,067 --> 00:00:10,633 - YEAH. 7 00:00:10,633 --> 00:00:12,433 ALTHOUGH HE KIND OF DOESN'T KNOW HIS OWN STRENGTH, 8 00:00:12,433 --> 00:00:14,067 AND SOMETIMES WHEN HE SQUEEZES, 9 00:00:14,067 --> 00:00:18,400 I FEEL LIKE I'M BEING JUICED. 10 00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:19,900 BUT IT'S VERY THOUGHTFUL. 11 00:00:19,900 --> 00:00:22,200 - CAN'T YOU JUST TELL HIM TO LIGHTEN UP A LITTLE? 12 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:23,633 - I DON'T HAVE THE HEART. 13 00:00:23,633 --> 00:00:25,933 PLUS I USUALLY BLACK OUT BEFORE I CAN SAY ANYTHING. 14 00:00:25,933 --> 00:00:28,967 [laughter] 15 00:00:28,967 --> 00:00:30,367 - MY BERNIE DOES CUTE THINGS TOO. 16 00:00:30,367 --> 00:00:32,867 YOU KNOW, LIKE, EVERY NIGHT HE SHUFFLES IN 17 00:00:32,867 --> 00:00:34,033 IN HIS PAJAMAS. 18 00:00:34,033 --> 00:00:36,600 HE KNEELS BY THE BED AND PRAYS. 19 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:38,033 - AW. 20 00:00:38,033 --> 00:00:40,500 - YOU KNOW, WHEN RAY KNEELS BY THE BED, 21 00:00:40,500 --> 00:00:42,833 IT'S NOT SO MUCH PRAYING AS BEGGING. 22 00:00:42,833 --> 00:00:46,467 [laughter] 23 00:00:46,467 --> 00:00:51,000 NO, YOU KNOW WHAT? RAY IS PRETTY SWEET HIMSELF. 24 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:53,133 THE OTHER NIGHT, WHEN I WOKE UP, 25 00:00:53,133 --> 00:00:55,233 HE WAS WHIMPERING IN HIS SLEEP. 26 00:00:55,233 --> 00:00:56,533 - REALLY? - YEAH. 27 00:00:56,533 --> 00:00:59,700 AND THEN HE SAID, "CHOO-CHOO GONE." 28 00:00:59,700 --> 00:01:01,867 both: AWW... 29 00:01:01,867 --> 00:01:05,300 - "CHOO-CHOO GONE." HOW ADORABLE IS THAT? 30 00:01:05,300 --> 00:01:07,033 - YOU KNOW, HE WOKE UP, AND HE WAS REALLY EMBARRASSED, 31 00:01:07,033 --> 00:01:09,000 BUT HE TOLD ME HE WAS HAVING A DREAM 32 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:10,767 THAT HE WAS IN THE PARK WITH HIS MOMMY, 33 00:01:10,767 --> 00:01:14,133 AND THE KIDDY TRAIN LEFT BEFORE HE GOT ON. 34 00:01:14,133 --> 00:01:15,900 - OHH. - I KNOW. 35 00:01:15,900 --> 00:01:17,167 - I AM SUCH A SUCKER 36 00:01:17,167 --> 00:01:18,667 FOR THAT LITTLE BOY THING IN MEN. 37 00:01:18,667 --> 00:01:21,600 IT'S SO ENDEARING. [door opens] 38 00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:25,100 - WHERE'S MARIE? I LOST MY SHOE. 39 00:01:37,167 --> 00:01:38,500 - COME ON, ROBERT. 40 00:01:38,500 --> 00:01:40,300 YOU DIDN'T PLAY THAT BAD, ALL RIGHT? 41 00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:44,500 I WAS JUST AWESOME. 42 00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:48,133 - THANKS. YOU ALWAYS KNOW JUST WHAT TO SAY. 43 00:01:48,133 --> 00:01:49,700 - WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT? IT'S NOT LIKE ANYBODY SAW YOU. 44 00:01:49,700 --> 00:01:52,133 YOU WERE IN THE WOODS THE WHOLE TIME. 45 00:01:57,433 --> 00:01:59,400 - ALL RIGHT, SO YOU JUST INVITED ME IN TO INSULT ME? 46 00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:01,300 IS THAT IT? - YES. 47 00:02:01,300 --> 00:02:04,633 AND TO OFFER YOU A MIXED BERRY JUICE BOX. 48 00:02:04,633 --> 00:02:07,500 - HMM. I DO LIKE MIXED BERRY. 49 00:02:07,500 --> 00:02:09,667 - HERE, I'LL PUT THE STRAW IN FOR YOU. 50 00:02:09,667 --> 00:02:13,767 I KNOW YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO GET IT ANYWHERE NEAR THE HOLE. 51 00:02:13,767 --> 00:02:17,033 - I CAN DO IT MYSELF! 52 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:21,167 GOOD-BYE! 53 00:02:21,167 --> 00:02:23,567 - WHY ARE YOU BEING SUCH A BABY? 54 00:02:23,567 --> 00:02:24,833 - BABY? - YEAH. 55 00:02:24,833 --> 00:02:26,800 - I'M A BABY? 56 00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:30,700 BABY KNOWS THREE WORDS, "CHOO-CHOO GONE." 57 00:02:35,667 --> 00:02:38,100 - WHAT? 58 00:02:38,100 --> 00:02:40,867 - NOTHING. [sips noisily] 59 00:02:40,867 --> 00:02:41,967 AHH! 60 00:02:41,967 --> 00:02:45,300 [imitates train whistle] 61 00:02:51,067 --> 00:02:52,667 - HEY. HOW WAS YOUR GOLF? 62 00:02:52,667 --> 00:02:55,367 - W-W-WHAT'D YOU DO? YOU TOLD ROBERT MY DREAM? 63 00:02:55,367 --> 00:02:56,433 - WHAT? 64 00:02:56,433 --> 00:02:58,733 - MY TRAIN DREAM. "CHOO-CHOO GONE." 65 00:02:58,733 --> 00:03:00,833 - NO, I DIDN'T TELL ROBERT THAT. 66 00:03:00,833 --> 00:03:02,500 OH, AMY. 67 00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:04,567 - YOU TOLD AMY? 68 00:03:04,567 --> 00:03:07,300 - WELL, YOU KNOW, I JUST THOUGHT IT WAS SWEET, AND SO DID SHE. 69 00:03:07,300 --> 00:03:08,800 AND I DIDN'T THINK SHE WOULD TELL ROBERT. 70 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:10,633 - NO, IT'S NOT SWEET. IT'S PERSONAL. 71 00:03:10,633 --> 00:03:12,167 - I'M SORRY, I'LL TELL AMY 72 00:03:12,167 --> 00:03:13,867 TO KEEP THOSE KIND OF THINGS BETWEEN US. 73 00:03:13,867 --> 00:03:15,600 - WHA-- NO! NO! 74 00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:18,000 HOW 'BOUT YOU JUST KEEP THEM BETWEEN US? 75 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:21,633 WAIT A MINUTE, WHAT THINGS? SHE KNOWS OTHER OF MY THINGS? 76 00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:24,500 - RAY, JUST CALM DOWN. 77 00:03:24,500 --> 00:03:26,133 - WHAT ELSE DOES SHE KNOW? HUH? 78 00:03:26,133 --> 00:03:27,567 DOES SHE KNOW YOU SAW ME THAT TIME, 79 00:03:27,567 --> 00:03:31,267 SHAVING WITH YOUR PINK LADY RAZOR? 80 00:03:31,267 --> 00:03:32,667 - I DON'T KNOW. 81 00:03:32,667 --> 00:03:34,033 - COME ON, COME ON, THINK. DID YOU TELL HER? 82 00:03:34,033 --> 00:03:35,367 - RAY, THIS IS CRAZY. 83 00:03:35,367 --> 00:03:37,100 WHAT, DO YOU EXPECT ME TO REMEMBER 84 00:03:37,100 --> 00:03:40,500 EVERYTHING I'VE EVER TOLD AMY ABOUT YOU OVER THE YEARS? 85 00:03:40,500 --> 00:03:43,200 - YEARS? 86 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,500 YOU'VE BEEN DOING THIS TO ME FOR YEARS? 87 00:03:45,500 --> 00:03:48,200 - OKAY, I REALIZE YOU'RE UPSET, 88 00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:50,000 AND I WILL TRY TO BE MORE SENSITIVE, 89 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,200 BUT I DO TALK TO AMY ABOUT MY LIFE. 90 00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:55,367 AND I'M SORRY, BUT YOU HAPPEN TO BE A BIG PART OF MY LIFE. 91 00:03:55,367 --> 00:03:57,733 - WELL, I'M SORRY YOU AND THE OTHER HENS 92 00:03:57,733 --> 00:03:59,367 DON'T HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO 93 00:03:59,367 --> 00:04:01,167 THAN TO--THAN TO CLUCK AROUND THE HENHOUSE 94 00:04:01,167 --> 00:04:04,467 LIKE A GAGGLE OF CLUCKETY-CLUCKING HENS! 95 00:04:07,467 --> 00:04:08,967 - WE'RE NOT CLUCKING, RAY. 96 00:04:08,967 --> 00:04:11,933 WE'RE SHARING OUR FEELINGS. 97 00:04:11,933 --> 00:04:13,433 - OH, MY GOD. 98 00:04:13,433 --> 00:04:17,700 YOU TELL HER ABOUT OUR SEX! 99 00:04:17,700 --> 00:04:21,067 - LOOK, RAY, LISTEN. I DON'T... 100 00:04:21,067 --> 00:04:22,467 SHE'S MY BEST FRIEND. 101 00:04:22,467 --> 00:04:24,333 - DUMP HER! 102 00:04:24,333 --> 00:04:25,767 - WHAT? - YOU HAVE TO DUMP HER. 103 00:04:25,767 --> 00:04:28,100 SHE KNOWS TOO MUCH, THANKS TO YOUR GOSSIP. 104 00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:32,433 YES, THAT'S RIGHT. YOU'RE A GOSSIP. 105 00:04:35,167 --> 00:04:36,533 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 106 00:04:36,533 --> 00:04:38,233 - I'M GOING UPSTAIRS TO TAKE A SHOWER, 107 00:04:38,233 --> 00:04:40,667 AND I WOULD RATHER AMY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT I WASH 108 00:04:40,667 --> 00:04:43,667 OR HOW LONG I WASH IT! 109 00:04:48,900 --> 00:04:50,233 [TV turns on] 110 00:04:50,233 --> 00:04:51,733 [sports announcer speaks indistinctly] 111 00:04:51,733 --> 00:04:53,767 [door opens] - HEY. 112 00:04:53,767 --> 00:04:55,133 OH, GAME'S ALREADY ON? 113 00:04:55,133 --> 00:04:58,400 - YEAH, YEAH, IT JUST STARTED. 114 00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:00,033 - UH, SAY THERE, DAD, 115 00:05:00,033 --> 00:05:03,633 HOW 'BOUT PASSING ME SOME OF THOSE TASTY CHIPS? 116 00:05:03,633 --> 00:05:06,767 - WHY, CERTAINLY, SON. HERE YOU GO. 117 00:05:09,067 --> 00:05:14,600 [both crunching loudly] 118 00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:19,667 - HEY, ANIMALS, CAN YOU AT LEAST EAT WITH YOUR MOUTH SHUT? 119 00:05:19,667 --> 00:05:21,700 - OH, I'M SORRY. WHAT'S THE MATTER? 120 00:05:21,700 --> 00:05:25,500 DON'T YOU LIKE THE WAY WE CHOO-CHOO? 121 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:34,900 - CHOO-CHOO. CHOO-CHOO GONE! 122 00:05:34,900 --> 00:05:36,400 [laughter] 123 00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:38,133 WE GOT HIM TOTALLY WORKED. 124 00:05:38,133 --> 00:05:40,333 - YEAH, HA-HA. VERY FUNNY. 125 00:05:40,333 --> 00:05:41,733 YEAH, YOU WOULDN'T BE LAUGHING 126 00:05:41,733 --> 00:05:43,867 IF YOU KNEW WHAT THE DREAM WAS REALLY ABOUT. 127 00:05:43,867 --> 00:05:45,367 - YEAH, RIGHT. - TRUST ME. 128 00:05:45,367 --> 00:05:47,467 I DIDN'T TELL DEBRA THE EXACT TRUTH. 129 00:05:47,467 --> 00:05:50,300 - OH, YEAH? - WHAT WAS IT? 130 00:05:50,300 --> 00:05:52,367 - OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 131 00:05:52,367 --> 00:05:55,867 REMEMBER ELLEN CHULESKY FROM HIGH SCHOOL? 132 00:05:55,867 --> 00:05:57,600 - OH, YEAH. 133 00:05:57,600 --> 00:06:00,933 SHE WAS A WOMAN AMONG GIRLS. - YEAH. 134 00:06:00,933 --> 00:06:02,333 WELL, IN MY CLASS, 135 00:06:02,333 --> 00:06:05,767 WE USED TO CALL HER CHOO-CHOO CHULESKY. 136 00:06:05,767 --> 00:06:09,000 SO ANYWAY, IN THE DREAM, IT WAS NO KIDDY TRAIN. 137 00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:13,067 IT WAS JUST ME AND CHOO-CHOO. 138 00:06:13,067 --> 00:06:18,067 ALL ABOARD! 139 00:06:18,067 --> 00:06:20,667 both: OOH. 140 00:06:20,667 --> 00:06:23,233 - SO THEN WHAT DOES "CHOO-CHOO GONE" MEAN? 141 00:06:23,233 --> 00:06:25,933 - WELL, SHE HAD HER WAY WITH ME AND LEFT. 142 00:06:25,933 --> 00:06:28,800 SO "CHOO-CHOO" WAS GONE. 143 00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:31,433 ANYWAY, THEN I HAD TO MAKE UP THE WHOLE TRAIN THING 144 00:06:31,433 --> 00:06:32,833 'CAUSE THE WIFE WAS THERE. 145 00:06:32,833 --> 00:06:36,867 - AH, THEY'RE ALWAYS THERE. 146 00:06:36,867 --> 00:06:38,967 - I DIDN'T KNOW DEBRA WAS GOING TO GO BLABBING IT. 147 00:06:38,967 --> 00:06:40,433 I DON'T GET IT. 148 00:06:40,433 --> 00:06:41,700 SHE HAS NOTHING BETTER TO DO 149 00:06:41,700 --> 00:06:44,333 THAN TO TALK ABOUT MY PERSONAL LIFE? 150 00:06:44,333 --> 00:06:46,700 - RAYMOND, RAYMOND, RAYMOND. 151 00:06:46,700 --> 00:06:49,800 SEE, THAT JUST SHOWS THE SURPRISING NAIVETE 152 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:50,867 ON YOUR PART. 153 00:06:50,867 --> 00:06:52,233 FOR, YOU SEE, 154 00:06:52,233 --> 00:06:54,367 IT IS ALWAYS THE NATURE OF THE FEMALE 155 00:06:54,367 --> 00:06:57,467 TO GATHER WITH OTHER FEMALES-- 156 00:06:57,467 --> 00:07:03,233 - AND SCREECH LIKE A TREE FULL OF CHINESE MONKEYS. 157 00:07:03,233 --> 00:07:05,433 - YEAH, WELL... 158 00:07:05,433 --> 00:07:07,067 I DON'T DO IT TO HER. 159 00:07:07,067 --> 00:07:08,500 I DON'T GO AROUND TELLING EVERYBODY 160 00:07:08,500 --> 00:07:10,800 THAT DEBRA BURPS ALL THE TIME. 161 00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:12,767 - DEBRA BURPS? 162 00:07:12,767 --> 00:07:16,233 - YEAH, SOMETIMES SHE GETS A NERVOUS STOMACH. 163 00:07:16,233 --> 00:07:19,533 IT ROCKS THE HOUSE. 164 00:07:19,533 --> 00:07:21,867 - REALLY? LITTLE DEBRA? 165 00:07:21,867 --> 00:07:23,233 - OH, YEAH. 166 00:07:23,233 --> 00:07:26,167 ONE TIME, I SAW HER BURP A DOOR OPEN. 167 00:07:26,167 --> 00:07:29,367 [laughter] 168 00:07:31,733 --> 00:07:32,900 - HEY. HEY. 169 00:07:32,900 --> 00:07:34,633 YOU KNOW WHAT AMY DOES? 170 00:07:34,633 --> 00:07:35,667 - WHAT? 171 00:07:35,667 --> 00:07:39,100 - OKAY. 172 00:07:39,100 --> 00:07:42,267 SOMETIMES WHEN SHE LAUGHS... 173 00:07:42,267 --> 00:07:45,667 SHE PEES A LITTLE. 174 00:07:50,233 --> 00:07:51,733 - WHAT DO YOU--? 175 00:07:51,733 --> 00:07:55,100 YOU MEAN, SHE PEES WHEN SHE LAUGHS? 176 00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:56,467 YEAH, WELL, A CHUCKLE WON'T DO IT, 177 00:07:56,467 --> 00:07:57,833 BUT IF YOU REALLY CRACK HER UP, 178 00:07:57,833 --> 00:08:00,500 YOU MIGHT WANT TO PUT SOME PAPERS DOWN. 179 00:08:00,500 --> 00:08:01,767 [laughter] 180 00:08:01,767 --> 00:08:03,200 - OH, MAN! 181 00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:04,833 OUR WIVES ARE DISGUSTING. 182 00:08:04,833 --> 00:08:06,033 - YEAH. 183 00:08:06,033 --> 00:08:07,533 - AW, THEY ALL GOT THEIR SECRETS. 184 00:08:07,533 --> 00:08:08,900 DO YOU WANT TO KNOW A GOOD ONE ABOUT YOUR MOTHER? 185 00:08:08,900 --> 00:08:11,100 both: NO, NO, NO. 186 00:08:11,100 --> 00:08:12,633 - DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT. 187 00:08:12,633 --> 00:08:16,900 - YOU KNOW YOUR MOTHER'S FAMOUS HOMEMADE MARINARA SAUCE? 188 00:08:16,900 --> 00:08:18,467 ON MORE THAN ONE OCCASION... 189 00:08:18,467 --> 00:08:21,067 [whispers] STORE-BOUGHT. 190 00:08:21,067 --> 00:08:23,600 - NO! - NO! NO WAY! 191 00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:25,567 UH-UH. - YES. WHEN SHE'S IN A RUSH, 192 00:08:25,567 --> 00:08:30,167 OUT OF THE JAR, MY FRIENDS. 193 00:08:30,167 --> 00:08:31,767 - THIS IS HUGE! 194 00:08:31,767 --> 00:08:34,100 - OH, MAN! 195 00:08:34,100 --> 00:08:37,267 SO IT'S HOMEMADE IF YOU LIVE IN AISLE SIX AT WALDBAUM'S. 196 00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:38,567 - YEAH, THERE YOU GO. 197 00:08:38,567 --> 00:08:41,133 HEY, LOOK, YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE AMY DOES? 198 00:08:41,133 --> 00:08:43,667 - HANG ON, LET ME TURN THIS THING OFF. 199 00:08:43,667 --> 00:08:44,733 - YOU KNOW WHAT? 200 00:08:44,733 --> 00:08:48,533 I'M GOING TO MAKE US A POT OF COFFEE. 201 00:08:48,533 --> 00:08:51,500 - THIS IS GREAT. 202 00:09:04,167 --> 00:09:06,000 - LISTEN, RAY, YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN THINKING A LOT 203 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:07,900 ABOUT WHAT YOU SAID YESTERDAY, 204 00:09:07,900 --> 00:09:10,033 AND I REALLY AM SORRY. 205 00:09:10,033 --> 00:09:11,600 I THINK YOU HAVE A GOOD POINT. 206 00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:14,967 SOME THINGS ARE PRIVATE AND SHOULD JUST STAY THAT WAY. 207 00:09:14,967 --> 00:09:16,400 - THANK YOU. 208 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:18,267 APOLOGY ACCEPTED. - OKAY. 209 00:09:18,267 --> 00:09:21,400 GOOD NIGHT. - NIGHT. 210 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:31,733 GUESS WHO PEES WHEN SHE LAUGHS. 211 00:09:33,767 --> 00:09:38,967 - GOT TO TELL YOU, THAT'S YOUR WORST COME-ON LINE EVER. 212 00:09:38,967 --> 00:09:40,633 - I'LL GIVE YOU A CLUE. 213 00:09:40,633 --> 00:09:44,067 FIRST LETTER, "A," LAST LETTER, "Y," 214 00:09:44,067 --> 00:09:46,167 AND DON'T ASK ME THE MIDDLE LETTER, 215 00:09:46,167 --> 00:09:50,033 BECAUSE I "M" NOT GOING TO TELL YOU. 216 00:09:50,033 --> 00:09:51,267 - NO. - IT'S AMY. 217 00:09:51,267 --> 00:09:53,467 - [gasps] SHE DOES? 218 00:09:53,467 --> 00:09:56,100 - ROBERT SAID THAT IF YOU GET HER LAUGHING HARD ENOUGH, 219 00:09:56,100 --> 00:09:58,767 80% CHANCE OF FLASH FLOODING. 220 00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:03,767 - WE HAVE BEEN FRIENDS FOR YEARS. 221 00:10:03,767 --> 00:10:05,067 WHY DIDN'T I KNOW THAT? 222 00:10:05,067 --> 00:10:09,133 - MAYBE YOU'RE NOT FUNNY. 223 00:10:09,133 --> 00:10:10,933 - SO WAIT A MINUTE. 224 00:10:10,933 --> 00:10:13,133 YOU AND ROBERT WERE GOSSIPING? 225 00:10:13,133 --> 00:10:14,633 - YEAH, AND MY FATHER TOO. 226 00:10:14,633 --> 00:10:16,633 YOU WANT TO KNOW SOMETHING ABOUT MY MOTHER? 227 00:10:23,233 --> 00:10:24,633 LOOK AT YOU. 228 00:10:24,633 --> 00:10:26,767 I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU THIS EXCITED IN BED. 229 00:10:30,100 --> 00:10:32,733 - SHUT UP AND TELL ME ABOUT YOUR MOTHER. 230 00:10:32,733 --> 00:10:34,067 - OKAY. 231 00:10:34,067 --> 00:10:36,733 YOU KNOW HER, UH, FAMOUS HOMEMADE SAUCE? 232 00:10:36,733 --> 00:10:38,067 - YEAH? 233 00:10:38,067 --> 00:10:39,833 - YOU WANT TO KNOW THE SECRET INGREDIENT? 234 00:10:39,833 --> 00:10:41,500 - OKAY. 235 00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:43,300 - GASOLINE... 236 00:10:43,300 --> 00:10:46,800 WHICH SHE PUTS IN HER CAR TO DRIVE TO WALDBAUM'S 237 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:50,800 TO GO TO AISLE SIX TO PICK UP A JAR OF RAGU! 238 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:51,833 - NO WAY! 239 00:10:51,833 --> 00:10:52,900 - YEAH! 240 00:10:52,900 --> 00:10:54,700 - [laughing] 241 00:10:54,700 --> 00:10:56,800 WOW! 242 00:10:56,800 --> 00:10:58,633 - HON, LOOK... 243 00:10:58,633 --> 00:11:01,900 I KNOW IT'S A LITTLE EARLY, BUT HAPPY ANNIVERSARY. 244 00:11:01,900 --> 00:11:06,700 - [giggles] 245 00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,800 OH, SO YOUR MOTHER'S A CHEATER. 246 00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:10,567 - MM-HMM, YEAH, SHE SURE IS. 247 00:11:10,567 --> 00:11:12,533 - WAIT A MINUTE. 248 00:11:12,533 --> 00:11:14,900 IF THAT'S WHAT THOSE GUYS WERE SAYING ABOUT THEIR WIVES, 249 00:11:14,900 --> 00:11:18,367 WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT ME? 250 00:11:18,367 --> 00:11:20,400 - NOTHING, I JUST... 251 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:23,733 I-I TOLD THEM THAT WHEN YOU SLEEP, 252 00:11:23,733 --> 00:11:28,200 SOMETIMES YOU WIGGLE YOUR NOSE LIKE A LITTLE BUNNY. 253 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,667 - I DO THAT? - YEAH, YEAH. 254 00:11:30,667 --> 00:11:32,300 MM-MM-MM-MM-MM. 255 00:11:32,300 --> 00:11:33,800 YEAH, IT'S CUTER ON YOU THOUGH. 256 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,200 - OH...I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TOLD THEM THAT. 257 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:37,933 - YEAH. - WHAT DID THEY SAY? 258 00:11:37,933 --> 00:11:41,300 - THEY...I THINK THEY SAID, "AWW." 259 00:11:41,300 --> 00:11:43,933 - AWW! - [laughs] 260 00:11:43,933 --> 00:11:46,000 - YEAH. IT WAS CUTE. 261 00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:49,133 - OOH! 262 00:11:50,133 --> 00:11:51,600 - YOU SURE? 263 00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:53,867 - I'M TELLING YOU, FOR APPLE PIE, 21 SECONDS. 264 00:11:53,867 --> 00:11:54,967 YOU'LL BE VERY HAPPY. 265 00:11:54,967 --> 00:11:56,667 [beeps] 266 00:11:56,667 --> 00:12:01,133 [microwave humming] 267 00:12:18,333 --> 00:12:20,633 - WHAT'S GOING ON? 268 00:12:20,633 --> 00:12:23,433 - JUST...HEATING UP PIE. 269 00:12:23,433 --> 00:12:25,200 [beeps] 270 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:28,467 - I'LL HAVE SOME, BUT WASH YOUR HANDS FIRST. 271 00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:33,300 - WHAT'S UP WITH YOU? 272 00:12:33,300 --> 00:12:35,400 - YOU GUYS GOT TO GET YOUR WIVES OUT OF MY HOUSE. 273 00:12:35,400 --> 00:12:38,300 THEY'RE OVER THERE LOOKING AT FURNITURE CATALOGS. 274 00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:39,700 I TOLD MARIE, "AT YOUR AGE, 275 00:12:39,700 --> 00:12:41,100 "YOU SHOULDN'T BE LOOKING AT ANY FURNITURE 276 00:12:41,100 --> 00:12:44,367 UNLESS IT HAS A LID." 277 00:12:51,933 --> 00:12:54,533 - CHOO-CHOO CHULESKY? 278 00:12:54,533 --> 00:12:56,400 - WHAT? 279 00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:59,433 - WHO IS CHOO-CHOO CHULESKY? 280 00:12:59,433 --> 00:13:03,500 - RAY, YOU BETTER GET BACK INTO YOUR MICROWAVE POSITION. 281 00:13:07,567 --> 00:13:10,600 - LOOK, DEBRA... IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. 282 00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:12,233 - OH, I THINK YOU WERE DREAMING ABOUT ANOTHER WOMAN, 283 00:13:12,233 --> 00:13:14,467 AND YOU TOLD ME A CHOO-CHOO TRAIN STORY. 284 00:13:14,467 --> 00:13:15,867 - NO... 285 00:13:15,867 --> 00:13:18,933 YOU COULDN'T KEEP YOUR GIANT MOUTH SHUT, COULD YOU? 286 00:13:18,933 --> 00:13:21,533 - I-I-I-- 287 00:13:21,533 --> 00:13:23,433 - I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING, ROBERT, I SWEAR. 288 00:13:23,433 --> 00:13:26,400 - WELL, SOMEONE OPENED THEIR GIANT MOUTH. 289 00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:29,533 - I DID. 290 00:13:29,533 --> 00:13:32,700 - WELL, I'M SURE YOU HAD YOUR REASONS. 291 00:13:35,833 --> 00:13:37,300 - MOM? 292 00:13:37,300 --> 00:13:40,667 - YOUR FATHER TOLD ME ABOUT YOUR LITTLE FANTASY, 293 00:13:40,667 --> 00:13:43,533 AND I FELT I'D BE REMISS IF I DIDN'T TELL DEBRA 294 00:13:43,533 --> 00:13:47,000 THAT HER MARRIAGE WAS IN PERIL. 295 00:13:48,167 --> 00:13:49,800 - DAD, WHY WOULD YOU TELL MOM? 296 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,967 - I WAS PROUD OF YOU. 297 00:13:51,967 --> 00:13:54,533 YOU DREAM LIKE A MAN. 298 00:13:54,533 --> 00:13:56,000 - YEAH, WELL, THAT'S GREAT, RAY. 299 00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:57,133 I'M GOING AROUND TELLING EVERYBODY 300 00:13:57,133 --> 00:13:58,567 WHAT A SWEET LITTLE BOY YOU ARE, 301 00:13:58,567 --> 00:14:00,000 AND YOU'RE DREAMING ABOUT ANOTHER WOMAN. 302 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:01,400 THANKS A LOT, RAY. 303 00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:02,767 THANKS FOR MAKING ME LOOK LIKE A TOTAL JERK! 304 00:14:02,767 --> 00:14:06,500 - WAIT, I MADE IT UP, I MADE IT UP! 305 00:14:06,500 --> 00:14:10,167 CHOO-CHOO REALLY WAS A TRAIN. 306 00:14:10,167 --> 00:14:13,167 - SO WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? YOU LIED TO THEM? 307 00:14:13,167 --> 00:14:17,333 - AND HERE I WAS FINALLY PROUD OF YOU. 308 00:14:17,333 --> 00:14:19,167 - YOU ARE UNBELIEVABLE, RAY. 309 00:14:19,167 --> 00:14:21,233 - NO, YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE UNBELIEVABLE. 310 00:14:21,233 --> 00:14:22,633 YOU TOOK SOMETHING THAT WAS PRIVATE, 311 00:14:22,633 --> 00:14:24,533 AND YOU BLABBED IT ALL OVER TOWN! 312 00:14:24,533 --> 00:14:26,167 - OH, YEAH? WELL, YOU WERE 313 00:14:26,167 --> 00:14:27,600 A PRETTY GOOD BLABBERMOUTH YOURSELF LAST NIGHT. 314 00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:30,267 "HEY, GUESS WHO PEES WHEN SHE LAUGHS." 315 00:14:38,667 --> 00:14:41,033 - GUESS WHO WAS RIGHT THERE WITH ME, LAUGHING IT UP. 316 00:14:41,033 --> 00:14:43,800 "OH! AMY PEES! HA-HA, THAT'S SO FUNNY!" 317 00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:47,100 YEAH. 318 00:14:49,633 --> 00:14:52,567 - ROBERT. 319 00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:58,100 - I LOVE YOU. 320 00:14:58,100 --> 00:14:59,433 AMY. AMY. 321 00:14:59,433 --> 00:15:00,600 AMY, LISTEN, I'M SORRY. 322 00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:04,333 SWEETIE, COME ON, LOOK AT ME. 323 00:15:04,333 --> 00:15:07,533 WE WERE ALL TALKING. EVERYONE WAS DOING IT! 324 00:15:10,267 --> 00:15:11,933 DEBRA BELCHES LIKE A TRUCK DRIVER, 325 00:15:11,933 --> 00:15:14,367 AND MA USES RAGU! 326 00:15:14,367 --> 00:15:17,000 - FRANK! 327 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:18,533 - RAY! 328 00:15:18,533 --> 00:15:20,800 THAT'S WHAT YOU TOLD THEM ABOUT ME, THAT I BURP? 329 00:15:20,800 --> 00:15:22,767 YOU JUST MADE UP THAT CUTE LITTLE NOSE THING? 330 00:15:22,767 --> 00:15:24,733 - I DIDN'T MAKE IT UP. LOOK, THERE IT IS. THERE IT IS. 331 00:15:24,733 --> 00:15:26,167 OW! 332 00:15:26,167 --> 00:15:27,533 - OH, ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! 333 00:15:27,533 --> 00:15:29,667 A LOT OF THINGS HAVE BEEN SAID, 334 00:15:29,667 --> 00:15:31,467 AND I HAVE NO PROBLEM FACING THE TRUTH, 335 00:15:31,467 --> 00:15:34,033 HOWEVER PAINFUL IT MIGHT BE. 336 00:15:34,033 --> 00:15:36,300 NOW, ABOUT MY SAUCE, 337 00:15:36,300 --> 00:15:39,167 FRANK, TELL THEM YOU'RE A LIAR. 338 00:15:44,067 --> 00:15:45,267 - WHAT? 339 00:15:45,267 --> 00:15:47,800 - DO YOU EVER WANT TO EAT AGAIN? 340 00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:49,633 - I LIED. 341 00:15:49,633 --> 00:15:52,600 I'M A CRAZY OLD MAN WHO LIES. 342 00:15:56,767 --> 00:15:58,133 - GOOD. 343 00:15:58,133 --> 00:16:00,033 AND I'M GLAD THAT YOU COULD ADMIT THAT. 344 00:16:00,033 --> 00:16:02,867 AND YOU SHOULD ALL KNOW BETTER THAN TO ENGAGE IN IDLE GOSSIP. 345 00:16:02,867 --> 00:16:04,167 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 346 00:16:04,167 --> 00:16:05,233 YOU'RE THE ONE WHO BLABBED IT TO DEBRA 347 00:16:05,233 --> 00:16:06,567 ABOUT CHOO-CHOO CHULESKY. 348 00:16:06,567 --> 00:16:07,900 - I DO NOT BLAB! 349 00:16:07,900 --> 00:16:12,233 WHAT I DO COMES FROM LOVE. 350 00:16:12,233 --> 00:16:13,500 AND IF YOU WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH, 351 00:16:13,500 --> 00:16:15,300 DEBRA IS THE WORST GOSSIP OF US ALL. 352 00:16:15,300 --> 00:16:17,300 - ME? YOU'RE THE ONE WHO ONCE TOLD ME 353 00:16:17,300 --> 00:16:19,900 THAT FRANK CAME TO BED WITH A TOUPEE ON FOR YOU. 354 00:16:19,900 --> 00:16:24,200 - WHAT? 355 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:26,467 - THIS IS AN OUTRAGE, MARIE. 356 00:16:26,467 --> 00:16:29,867 THAT WAS A HAT I FOUND ON THE STREET. 357 00:16:29,867 --> 00:16:31,300 - OH, REALLY? 358 00:16:31,300 --> 00:16:34,900 AND WHAT ABOUT WHAT DEBRA TOLD AMY LAST JULY? 359 00:16:34,900 --> 00:16:36,133 - WHAT? 360 00:16:36,133 --> 00:16:38,200 - DEBRA TOLD AMY THAT RAYMOND THOUGHT 361 00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:39,600 THAT AMY AND ROBERT'S MARRIAGE 362 00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:41,333 DIDN'T HAVE A CHANCE IN HELL. 363 00:16:41,333 --> 00:16:43,100 - MARIE, WHO TOLD YOU THAT? 364 00:16:43,100 --> 00:16:44,767 - MARIE, I TOLD YOU THAT IN CONFIDENCE! 365 00:16:44,767 --> 00:16:46,767 - AMY, HOW COULD YOU TELL MARIE THAT I SAID THAT? 366 00:16:46,767 --> 00:16:48,600 - DEBRA, HOW COULD YOU TELL AMY WHAT I TOLD YOU? 367 00:16:48,600 --> 00:16:52,567 - MY MARRIAGE DOESN'T HAVE A CHANCE IN HELL? 368 00:16:52,567 --> 00:16:54,733 - [belches] 369 00:17:04,967 --> 00:17:09,500 EXCUSE ME. 370 00:17:09,500 --> 00:17:11,167 - I DIDN'T SAY YOUR MARRIAGE 371 00:17:11,167 --> 00:17:14,033 DOESN'T HAVE A CHANCE IN HELL... 372 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:17,900 THE WAY THAT SOUNDS. 373 00:17:17,900 --> 00:17:19,367 ALL RIGHT, LOOK. 374 00:17:19,367 --> 00:17:21,300 THERE ARE CERTAIN THINGS THAT A MAN SAYS TO HIS WIFE 375 00:17:21,300 --> 00:17:23,267 WHEN HE'S JUST TRYING TO, I DON'T KNOW, 376 00:17:23,267 --> 00:17:26,433 FILL THE SILENCE. 377 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:31,033 - OH... NOW I UNDERSTAND. 378 00:17:31,033 --> 00:17:33,833 YOU'RE A HATEFUL JERK-FACE. 379 00:17:33,833 --> 00:17:36,133 AND WHAT I MEAN BY THAT IS, 380 00:17:36,133 --> 00:17:39,533 YOU'RE HATEFUL, AND YOU'RE A JERK-FACE. 381 00:17:39,533 --> 00:17:41,333 - WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TELL AMY THAT? 382 00:17:41,333 --> 00:17:44,100 - I WAS JUST TALKING TO AMY ABOUT THE STUPID THINGS MEN SAY. 383 00:17:44,100 --> 00:17:45,600 WE ALL DO IT. 384 00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:47,567 AMY KNEW WHAT I MEANT. SHE WAS OKAY WITH IT. 385 00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:49,133 YOU WERE OKAY WITH IT, RIGHT? 386 00:17:49,133 --> 00:17:51,400 - ACTUALLY, I WAS PRETTY UPSET. 387 00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:55,900 - THAT'S WHY SHE CAME TO ME. 388 00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:57,267 - OKAY, SEE? SHE WAS UPSET. 389 00:17:57,267 --> 00:17:58,800 - YEAH, BUT YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SAID IT. 390 00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:00,433 - YEAH, B-- 391 00:18:00,433 --> 00:18:03,133 HEY, WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE. 392 00:18:03,133 --> 00:18:04,533 YOU'VE BEEN WALKING AROUND, 393 00:18:04,533 --> 00:18:06,100 SECRETLY THINKING I'M A HATEFUL JERK-FACE 394 00:18:06,100 --> 00:18:08,400 BUT STILL ACTING ALL FAKE NICE TO ME? 395 00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:12,200 - I HAVEN'T BEEN THAT NICE. 396 00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:13,567 A FEW MONTHS AGO, YOU GOT A HAIRCUT, 397 00:18:13,567 --> 00:18:15,567 AND EVERYBODY SAID, "NICE HAIRCUT, RAY," 398 00:18:15,567 --> 00:18:18,567 BUT I DIDN'T. 399 00:18:20,567 --> 00:18:21,967 - HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME? 400 00:18:21,967 --> 00:18:23,067 I MEAN, THAT'S TERRIBLE. 401 00:18:23,067 --> 00:18:24,633 - YOU HURT MY FEELINGS. 402 00:18:24,633 --> 00:18:27,067 - STILL, YOU THINK SOMEBODY'S A HATEFUL JERK-FACE, 403 00:18:27,067 --> 00:18:28,367 YOU GOT TO TELL 'EM. 404 00:18:28,367 --> 00:18:29,667 I HAVE FEELINGS TOO. 405 00:18:29,667 --> 00:18:32,533 - HATEFUL JERK-FACE. FEEL BETTER? 406 00:18:32,533 --> 00:18:35,167 - YOU SEE? YOU MADE ME A HATEFUL JERK-FACE. 407 00:18:35,167 --> 00:18:36,700 - YOU KNOW, AMY, RAY'S RIGHT. 408 00:18:36,700 --> 00:18:38,400 HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW I UPSET YOU IF YOU DON'T 409 00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:39,833 SAY ANYTHING TO ME? I MEAN, COME ON. 410 00:18:39,833 --> 00:18:41,500 I'M SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR BEST FRIEND. 411 00:18:41,500 --> 00:18:44,133 - WHAT ABOUT ME? I'M SUPPOSED TO BE HER HUSBAND! 412 00:18:44,133 --> 00:18:45,433 I'M YOUR HUSBAND! 413 00:18:45,433 --> 00:18:46,800 DON'T YOU KNOW, AFTER ALL THESE YEARS, 414 00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:49,200 TO TELL ME IMMEDIATELY WHEN RAYMOND SCREWS UP? 415 00:18:49,200 --> 00:18:54,433 YOU PAGE ME AT WORK! 416 00:18:54,433 --> 00:18:56,600 - I MUST SAY, AMY, BEFORE YOU CAME INTO THE FAMILY, 417 00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:58,433 WE WERE ALL JUST OPEN WITH EACH OTHER. 418 00:18:58,433 --> 00:19:01,833 WE'D SAY WHATEVER WAS ON OUR MIND. 419 00:19:01,833 --> 00:19:03,167 AND NOW... 420 00:19:03,167 --> 00:19:06,267 WE HAVE TO TIPTOE AROUND YOUR FEELINGS. 421 00:19:06,267 --> 00:19:10,033 - IT'S NOT FAIR, AMY. 422 00:19:10,033 --> 00:19:13,600 - YEAH, AMY, SEE WHAT YOU DID? 423 00:19:14,967 --> 00:19:17,333 - [sobs] 424 00:19:17,333 --> 00:19:20,567 - AH, JEEZ. THERE SHE GOES AGAIN. 425 00:19:23,700 --> 00:19:27,000 - ROBERT, GET IN THERE. 426 00:19:29,167 --> 00:19:31,367 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID WRONG. 427 00:19:31,367 --> 00:19:33,200 I WAS BROUGHT UP TO BE NICE. 428 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:36,667 I NEVER SAY ANYTHING BAD ABOUT ANYBODY. 429 00:19:36,667 --> 00:19:39,767 WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE WANT? 430 00:19:39,767 --> 00:19:43,100 ALL I EVER WANTED TO DO WAS TO FIT INTO THIS FAMILY. 431 00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:47,167 - OH, HONEY. 432 00:19:47,167 --> 00:19:49,533 YOU DO FIT IN. 433 00:19:49,533 --> 00:19:54,300 - I HATE TO SAY IT, AMY, BUT YOU DO. 434 00:19:54,300 --> 00:19:55,433 - YEAH, I'M SORRY ABOUT ALL THAT STUFF 435 00:19:55,433 --> 00:19:56,733 I SAID ABOUT YOU AND ROBERT. 436 00:19:56,733 --> 00:19:59,967 YOU DEFINITELY HAVE A CHANCE IN HELL. 437 00:19:59,967 --> 00:20:01,167 - THANK YOU, RAY. 438 00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:02,600 AND THAT WAS A NICE HAIRCUT. 439 00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:06,100 - THANKS. I SWITCHED BARBERS. 440 00:20:06,100 --> 00:20:08,367 - AW, YOU SEE, AMY? 441 00:20:08,367 --> 00:20:10,967 YOU DO HAVE A PLACE IN OUR FAMILY, 442 00:20:10,967 --> 00:20:14,367 AND WE WILL ALWAYS HAVE A PLACE FOR YOU. 443 00:20:14,367 --> 00:20:18,433 - HERE YOU GO, SWEETIE. 444 00:20:23,233 --> 00:20:26,767 - ROBERT, I HAVE TO SPEAK UP. 445 00:20:26,767 --> 00:20:30,000 YOU'RE KILLING ME. 446 00:20:34,267 --> 00:20:37,433 - WOMEN. THEY'RE NEVER SATISFIED. 447 00:20:45,933 --> 00:20:47,700 - AH. 448 00:20:47,700 --> 00:20:49,800 - ARE YOU READY? 449 00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:51,033 OH, FRANK, COME ON! 450 00:20:51,033 --> 00:20:52,467 NO, DON'T TURN AROUND NOW. 451 00:20:52,467 --> 00:20:55,200 IT'S NOT EMBARRASSING. IT'S FUNNY. 452 00:21:02,033 --> 00:21:05,700 [laughter] 453 00:21:09,867 --> 00:21:10,900 - [laughs] 454 00:21:10,900 --> 00:21:13,133 [gasps]