1
00:00:01,400 --> 00:00:04,199
See, I'm definitely putting my foot down.
This isn't happening any more.

2
00:00:04,280 --> 00:00:07,750
No, it won't happen any more.
Keep watching.

3
00:00:07,840 --> 00:00:13,597
This series he's really stepped it up a gear.
I mean, I thought series one was pretty bad.

4
00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:19,359
And I thought he'd done it.
I thought he'd got it all out of his system.

5
00:00:19,760 --> 00:00:21,398
(PEOPLE LAUGHING)

6
00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:26,959
I thought I was safe on series two,
but, I mean, this has been unbelievable.

7
00:00:36,280 --> 00:00:40,319
I'm Nigel Williams.
I'm the editor on Extras, The Office,

8
00:00:40,400 --> 00:00:41,993
I've done a lot of Ricky's stand-up.

9
00:00:42,160 --> 00:00:43,594
(GROANING)

10
00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:47,074
Nearly. He's strong.

11
00:00:47,920 --> 00:00:51,197
WILLIAMS: He started off as quite
an amenable kind of guy, really.

12
00:00:51,280 --> 00:00:54,272
There were little things like drawings of me
on holiday in a thong,

13
00:00:54,360 --> 00:00:58,399
stuff like that, which was a bit weird,
but nothing really out of the ordinary.

14
00:00:58,640 --> 00:00:59,994
Hang on, I think...

15
00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:02,469
- I think I'll go and do this somewhere else.
- All right, see you later.

16
00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:04,039
(GROANING) I've got an idea.

17
00:01:04,120 --> 00:01:08,114
It was when he discovered tape
that things really kicked up a gear.

18
00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:11,317
MERCHANT: Can you explain
what's happening, Rick?

19
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:14,153
- I'm just doing the edit.
- Right, what are you working on?

20
00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:16,709
- Breakfast Boy.
- Okay, is that a scene for Extras or...

21
00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:19,758
No, no, it's... Nige.

22
00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:23,276
This is Breakfast Boy.

23
00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:27,433
It's got... You've got the cereal there,

24
00:01:27,520 --> 00:01:31,957
which also features there...
He loves his little Nut Crunch.

25
00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:34,395
He loves his little...
You love your little nuts, don't you?

26
00:01:34,480 --> 00:01:38,030
Tea bags.
Everyone likes a cup of tea at breakfast.

27
00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:42,273
And there's the spoon, which is...
It also vibrates a little bit.

28
00:01:42,360 --> 00:01:44,590
That's just stuff that was lying around.

29
00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:47,237
I don't know, I think he's fascinating.

30
00:01:47,320 --> 00:01:50,312
I just think he's fascinating.
He's very versatile.

31
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:52,471
He's very versatile. Aren't you?

32
00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:57,680
- I was told this wasn't gonna happen again.
- No, you weren't. No, you weren't.

33
00:01:57,760 --> 00:01:59,956
Charlie said. The producer.

34
00:02:01,600 --> 00:02:03,750
When did he say that?

35
00:02:03,840 --> 00:02:05,592
When I first agreed to it,

36
00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:07,717
- when I signed the contract.
- So he lied to you.

37
00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:10,599
So the producer lied to him,
which is one thing I never do.

38
00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:14,230
So who do you like more, then?
Me, who's honest.

39
00:02:14,320 --> 00:02:16,596
And I'm telling you now,
this is gonna happen every day,

40
00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:18,956
and it's gonna get worse, okay?

41
00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:22,239
It starts off as quite small

42
00:02:22,320 --> 00:02:24,834
and then before you know it, bang,
it's there, you can't move.

43
00:02:24,920 --> 00:02:26,911
You're taped up. He's sitting on me.

44
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:31,039
So, yeah. It's...
Often you don't have a lot of choice.

45
00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:32,674
(GRUNTING)

46
00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:36,355
Okay. Hands off, hands off.

47
00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:42,599
I did try stopping him once,
and he did sit on me.

48
00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:47,872
GERVAIS: Oh, God.

49
00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:51,353
Oh, he's digging his little paws in.

50
00:02:51,440 --> 00:02:54,717
I couldn't breathe. I was gasping for air.

51
00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:59,033
And, you know, he's heavier than he looks,
which is saying something.

52
00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:04,075
And it knocks... That elbow's protected there.

53
00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:06,754
It's a little bit uncomfortable.

54
00:03:09,920 --> 00:03:13,675
WILLIAMS: The worst moment for me
was definitely the cage incident.

55
00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:16,718
Ricky came in and said
do I wanna look at the sitcom set.

56
00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:19,189
I thought, "Yeah, that's nice,
sort of interesting."

57
00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:21,510
So I went down there.
The crew were all at lunch,

58
00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:24,433
and I was looking around the set,
it all looked very interesting.

59
00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:27,797
I turn round and Ricky's got a mop head
in his hand,

60
00:03:27,880 --> 00:03:29,473
and I think,
"Hang on, what's going on here?"

61
00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:34,716
WILLIAMS: Before I know it,
I'm in a cage staring out,

62
00:03:34,800 --> 00:03:37,792
there's 20 crew members all looking puzzled,

63
00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:40,789
with Ricky doubled up in pain.

64
00:03:41,800 --> 00:03:43,837
- Right, Nige...
- Yeah?

65
00:03:43,920 --> 00:03:46,116
- ...is this the worst one yet?
- Definitely, yeah.

66
00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:48,555
'Cause there's probably 200 people watching.

67
00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:54,077
- Oh, God.
- Normally it's in the privacy of our own room.

68
00:03:54,160 --> 00:03:56,197
I can't help but feel I'm partly responsible.

69
00:03:56,280 --> 00:03:58,999
Have you got enough footage?
That's the question.

70
00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:01,435
Have you got enough footage now?
Are we done?

71
00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:05,354
I'm thinking, "What the hell?"
That wasn't my proudest moment.

72
00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:12,872
GERVAIS: Nige, where are you going?
Come here. Let me help you take it off.

73
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:15,469
WILLIAMS: Got any scissors?

74
00:04:15,920 --> 00:04:18,196
GERVAIS: Look at Ashley's face.

75
00:04:18,480 --> 00:04:19,709
WILLIAMS: Hi, Ashley. How are you?

76
00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:22,030
I haven't seen you for a year.
How's it going? You all right?

77
00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:23,793
(GERVAIS LAUGHING)

78
00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:27,794
ASHLEY: He's got... He's got a wife.
WOMAN: That's amazing.

79
00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:29,632
And kids.

80
00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:35,032
You are lovely. You're the first person
who's ever come to the rescue.

81
00:04:35,120 --> 00:04:36,030
Here you are.

82
00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:40,115
Being humiliated
in front of 20 crew members.

83
00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:43,599
Bullying. Physical abuse.

84
00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:46,436
I don't know. Is it bullying?

85
00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:48,272
Do you wanna see how hard
I can punch Nigel in the stomach

86
00:04:48,360 --> 00:04:49,714
without making him sick?

87
00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:50,835
(LAUGHING)

88
00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:52,877
- You hold his arms behind his back.
- I've never met him before.

89
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:55,554
You hold Nigel's arms behind his back.
I will see how hard I can punch him.

90
00:04:55,640 --> 00:04:57,551
'Cause I know how hard to punch someone
to make him sick,

91
00:04:57,640 --> 00:05:00,439
if I put all my weight,
but if I take about 20% off it,

92
00:05:00,520 --> 00:05:03,797
it won't make him sick,
it will just spoil his day.

93
00:05:03,880 --> 00:05:04,950
I'm up for it.

94
00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:08,550
Jonathan Ross came in
to view something that Ricky had done.

95
00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:10,358
Is it like a scrum?

96
00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:15,118
Somehow we ending up having
a massive bundle, and I cricked my neck.

97
00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:19,952
Ow! Oh, God.

98
00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:24,715
For a week afterwards, I was in serious pain.

99
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,393
I told Ricky about it,
and he found it really funny.

100
00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:30,110
Wait, no, there it is. There it is, Jonathan.
There it is.

101
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,793
(GERVAIS LAUGHING)

102
00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:33,279
GERVAIS: Fucking hell.

103
00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:37,194
See, this is what annoys me, okay?

104
00:05:37,280 --> 00:05:39,999
Nigel, there, he moans.
He goes, "Oh, don't tie me up."

105
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:43,516
Or, "Don't jump on me,"
don't do this, don't do that.

106
00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:47,230
And yet he gets a free meal every day.
That's totally free.

107
00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:50,631
Right? He gets a pudding if he wants it.
We pay him.

108
00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:52,354
Which is really...

109
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:57,389
- So I will tie you up any time I want.
- Everyone else gets free food.

110
00:05:57,480 --> 00:05:58,914
- Yes, I know.
- You don't tie them up.

111
00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:00,798
No, but I don't want to tie them up

112
00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:03,952
because they haven't got stupid little
Pob type faces, have they?

113
00:06:04,040 --> 00:06:05,394
Well, that's your opinion.

114
00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:08,791
That is not my opinion.
All my friends are slightly freakish.

115
00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:12,316
Robin lnce with his little thumbs.
Karl Pilkington with a perfectly round head.

116
00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:14,596
- Steve Merchant, goggle-eyed freak.
- MERCHANT: All right.

117
00:06:14,680 --> 00:06:18,355
- MERCHANT: Hang on a minute.
- And you look like fucking Pob.

118
00:06:18,440 --> 00:06:23,560
Okay? You are the one
I wanna squeeze and crush the most, really.

119
00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:27,470
You mentioned all those people, but I know
I'm the best looking out of all of them.

120
00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:31,030
- Right. I'm not being funny...
- I'm secure in myself.

121
00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:35,635
Look at his little ears.
He hasn't even got lobes, the twat.

122
00:06:35,920 --> 00:06:40,198
Look at him, look at that.
Fucking haircut like Tintin. Look.

123
00:06:40,280 --> 00:06:42,157
Oh, yeah, 'cause you're amazing.
Look at you.

124
00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:44,675
Come on, all right, let's have a go.

125
00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:48,196
I love it when he fights back.
You are in fucking trouble now, Nigel.

126
00:06:50,160 --> 00:06:51,833
(GRUNTING)

127
00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:07,156
It's the... It's the head that's the problem,
'cause it's kind of bringing...

128
00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:08,909
Bringing it...

129
00:07:09,000 --> 00:07:11,435
(GRUNTING)

130
00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:17,153
Yeah, it's... This is the best.

131
00:07:17,240 --> 00:07:18,913
(GERVAIS CACKLING)

132
00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:21,310
I still can't get out of it.

133
00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:25,118
I can honestly say
that I haven't been bullied before.

134
00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:28,352
I wasn't bullied at school,
and I'm not bullied by anyone else.

135
00:07:28,440 --> 00:07:32,229
I'm not gonna give you the satisfaction
of wriggling around.

136
00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:39,799
GERVAIS: (GIGGLING) You've shown me.

137
00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:44,033
I mean, maybe when people see this,
they might start having a pop,

138
00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:46,475
but at the moment, it's only Ricky

139
00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:49,871
that somehow sees this face
and wants to tape it up.

140
00:07:50,160 --> 00:07:54,199
I'm getting so bored with this now.
You're obviously not.

141
00:07:54,280 --> 00:07:55,953
I don't think so because at one point,

142
00:07:56,040 --> 00:07:58,236
when you were wriggling around there
and talking,

143
00:07:58,320 --> 00:08:01,358
I thought I was gonna burst
through laughing so much.

144
00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:03,750
So I don't think I am
getting bored with this, no.

145
00:08:03,840 --> 00:08:07,151
But you're laughing with me, aren't you?
Not at me.

146
00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:14,673
As many people know,
he's got quite a low attention span.

147
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:18,709
And 10 minutes in an edit suite is enough
for him, and he starts getting twitchy.

148
00:08:18,800 --> 00:08:21,314
Suddenly,
he's looking around for things to do.

149
00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,552
All right. See, now that's gone over my eyes.

150
00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:26,472
You said you were gonna make
holes in my eyes.

151
00:08:26,560 --> 00:08:29,473
I know. I'll do it with a fork in a minute.

152
00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:32,956
Tissue paper, tape, anything that's around,
he'll steam in there.

153
00:08:33,040 --> 00:08:36,829
He's like a rollercoaster.
You can't You really can't stop it.

154
00:08:36,920 --> 00:08:40,197
Steve, you've got to give me this.
Look at this one.

155
00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:41,839
Nigel, look up.

156
00:08:42,920 --> 00:08:44,638
I can't see anything.

157
00:08:44,760 --> 00:08:49,197
GERVAIS: (LAUGHING) It's good, isn't it?
Tell them what's happened today.

158
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:53,630
You can see it's the usual.
Ricky's surpassed himself.

159
00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:55,791
Apparently. I can't see anything.

160
00:08:55,880 --> 00:09:00,590
This is... It must be one of his better ones
'cause it's really hurting.

161
00:09:00,680 --> 00:09:04,435
My eyes are really pushing back
into their sockets.

162
00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:05,874
(GERVAIS LAUGHING)

163
00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:08,395
I've got a headache. My mouth is dry.

164
00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:10,312
I can't breathe.

165
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:13,438
Do you want a drink of water? See if you can.

166
00:09:13,680 --> 00:09:15,671
- All right...
- Right, see if you can drink it.

167
00:09:15,760 --> 00:09:17,558
Just have a go.

168
00:09:20,040 --> 00:09:21,553
Good. Come on.

169
00:09:27,440 --> 00:09:29,511
MERCHANT: Nigel, over here.

170
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:31,872
Look up. Over here.

171
00:09:31,960 --> 00:09:33,633
(GERVAIS LAUGHING)

172
00:09:34,120 --> 00:09:38,034
I'm not being funny, Steve,
but if I put your glasses on him...

173
00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:47,234
All right, hang on.

174
00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:55,279
I've insulted two people in one fell swoop.

175
00:09:57,480 --> 00:09:59,153
That's great!

176
00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:02,312
- Oh, trust me, Nige, you look brilliant.
- Really?

177
00:10:02,400 --> 00:10:06,189
To be honest, part of me is quite proud
to be a part of these creations.

178
00:10:06,280 --> 00:10:09,557
I mean, it is a partnership.
You know, Ricky thinks these things up.

179
00:10:09,640 --> 00:10:12,200
If he didn't have me, who would he...
Who would he do it to?

180
00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:17,593
So part of me is quite proud of, yeah,
of people seeing it,

181
00:10:17,680 --> 00:10:19,830
'cause he wouldn't have an outlet otherwise.

182
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:23,794
I tell you what we should do.
We should do skydiving.

183
00:10:24,360 --> 00:10:26,749
- How can I?
- Come here, come here.

184
00:10:27,320 --> 00:10:31,154
You're asking for trouble
'cause I can't see were your testicles are.

185
00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:33,709
- Okay, right, wait a minute.
- Are you sure?

186
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,440
- Yeah, yeah.
- If I fall over, though...

187
00:10:37,920 --> 00:10:39,877
- If I fall, am I gonna hit anything?
- No.

188
00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:42,156
- You sure?
- No, I'm not gonna let you down, right?

189
00:10:42,240 --> 00:10:43,469
Okay, okay.

190
00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:46,838
MERCHANT: Brilliant.

191
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:50,279
Steve, are you getting this?
Get it from a high angle, eh?

192
00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:53,557
'Cause this is hilarious. Right, okay.

193
00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:58,877
Okay, all right, okay.

194
00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:04,039
Too many... I'm gonna fucking burst!

195
00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:08,512
Oi, don't jump on. Oh, fuck me. Right.

196
00:11:10,440 --> 00:11:15,037
Steve, do you wanna come round here?
Right, okay. Right, okay.

197
00:11:15,120 --> 00:11:17,953
(LAUGHING) Just be careful!

198
00:11:18,040 --> 00:11:20,873
Just be careful, right? Don't leap, don't leap.

199
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:23,839
- All right, all right.
- Okay. Right, okay.

200
00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:26,958
Okay, right. Okay, right.

201
00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:29,954
- Okay. Don't let go, it's too dangerous.
- All right.

202
00:11:30,040 --> 00:11:32,839
- I have no intention of letting go.
- Okay.

203
00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:37,958
- Okay, now just look up for a minute.
- Oh, that's amazing. Oh.

204
00:11:39,360 --> 00:11:40,998
Okay?

205
00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:45,439
Oh, God.

206
00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:48,839
He's also quite cunning the way he does it.

207
00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:54,598
So, you know, he can start off with doodling
tattoos on my arm, a big man's cock,

208
00:11:55,240 --> 00:11:58,790
and then before I know it,
he's taping up my air hole so I can't breathe,

209
00:11:58,880 --> 00:12:02,874
he's sitting on me.
He has been known to fart on my head.

210
00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:06,398
I'm trying to explore the grotesque.

211
00:12:06,480 --> 00:12:10,394
You know Nigel, we make him look like
little pig boy, it looks quite fun and happy.

212
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:14,110
But I've tried to go for something
a little more macabre.

213
00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:20,150
I can tell this is a good one
'cause it really hurts.

214
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,595
Oh, let me see you try and eat a banana.

215
00:12:22,680 --> 00:12:25,911
No, come on. Seriously, I'll peel it.
Eat a banana.

216
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,991
Come on, eat it. Eat a banana.

217
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:31,436
Right, on your marks, get set, go.

218
00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:34,592
- I just wanna sleep.
- No, just get your banana.

219
00:12:35,640 --> 00:12:37,233
(GERVAIS LAUGHING)

220
00:12:37,320 --> 00:12:41,314
- Go on, you've got to eat it all.
- I can't eat it. It's too tight.

221
00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:43,073
No, come on, eat a bit more.
Let's see you chew.

222
00:12:43,160 --> 00:12:46,596
- I can barely breathe.
- Okay, eat the fucking banana, though.

223
00:12:46,680 --> 00:12:48,557
Can't 'cause I can't breathe.

224
00:12:48,640 --> 00:12:51,519
- Get out of my face.
- Right, come on.

225
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:53,994
(GROANING)

226
00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:57,318
- Oh.
- Oh, he's ruined it.

227
00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:04,277
You know I like to use found objects.
That is my art.

228
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:07,509
And what I was working with today was dots.

229
00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:13,039
And I've used these to represent
make-up, jewellery, the like.

230
00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:17,030
And I've made Nigel up to be
a lovely lady just going out

231
00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:20,991
just by using the dots.
The blue is the eye shadow.

232
00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:24,869
Red is the rouge,
and he's got some lovely gold earrings on.

233
00:13:26,160 --> 00:13:28,674
Nige, what do you think?
Where would you be going looking like that?

234
00:13:28,760 --> 00:13:30,159
What sort of establishments would you...

235
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:32,800
I don't know.
I like this one 'cause it doesn't hurt.

236
00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:36,077
It's not taping my ear down
or squishing my nose,

237
00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:38,276
so I could go out like this.

238
00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:41,000
It feels quite comfortable.

239
00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:45,517
And now we're gonna have to try
and represent clothes with these.

240
00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:48,991
So pop those clothes off,
and we'll make you some underpants, or...

241
00:13:49,080 --> 00:13:51,959
- This was never mentioned.
- No, no, some stockings or something.

242
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:55,032
Lovely little bra. Lovely little brassiere.

243
00:13:55,120 --> 00:13:59,671
I'm not keen on taking my clothes off.
Sorry to disappoint you. It's just that...

244
00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:03,515
It's just, I'm not really...
I'm not really happy with that.

245
00:14:04,680 --> 00:14:06,637
(GERVAIS CHUCKLING)

246
00:14:10,320 --> 00:14:14,279
GERVAIS: All right, I can do the profile,
you can see there it's sort of like little...

247
00:14:14,360 --> 00:14:18,831
Little rosebud lips, the little weak chin,
that little thing there, right?

248
00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:22,311
But I can't get him front on.
Front on, he always looks like

249
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:26,155
an evil little pixie.
'Cause look at this face, right? Look.

250
00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:30,120
Look at that, right? Beady little eyes, right?
Weak chin.

251
00:14:30,200 --> 00:14:32,191
Look how he eats it.

252
00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:35,591
These pixie little fucking ears
and that haircut.

253
00:14:37,480 --> 00:14:38,550
He's my little lesbian.

254
00:14:38,640 --> 00:14:41,359
I am married. I'm not a lesbian.

255
00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:45,520
I... My wife thinks it's...
Well, certainly when it all started off,

256
00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:49,070
she thought it was a bit odd.
I mean, she was witness to the drawings.

257
00:14:49,160 --> 00:14:51,800
She has seen it develop over the years.

258
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:56,391
But now the weird thing is that I am coming
home with big cocks drawn on my arm,

259
00:14:56,480 --> 00:14:59,074
and lumps of hair taken out of me,
and limping,

260
00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:01,993
and she's just like,
"Good day with Ricky, dear?"

261
00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:03,957
It's all kind of really normal to her now.

262
00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:08,314
What I did today, I realised
that Nigel looks exactly like a little rodent.

263
00:15:08,480 --> 00:15:14,032
Like a little hamster or something.
So that's Nigel as a little hamster.

264
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:17,312
And there's quite a likeness. Nige.

265
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:20,633
(GERVAIS LAUGHING)

266
00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:22,910
What?

267
00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:31,555
- I do have a couple of children.
- Oh, it's amazing.

268
00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:33,711
And I was dropping them off at school,

269
00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:38,874
and one of the dads had seen
the extras from DVD one, series one,

270
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:40,712
and called me pig boy.

271
00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:43,110
GERVAIS: Oh, look at little pig boy.

272
00:15:43,200 --> 00:15:45,589
- (LAUGHING) Oh, God!
- Pig boy.

273
00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:49,639
I told Ricky about this, and he was
doubled up laughing the next day.

274
00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:52,519
He couldn't control himself.
I thought he was gonna have a heart attack.

275
00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:56,958
He likes that, doesn't he? He looks like
a little pig boy. Look at the camera.

276
00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:58,394
Look at little pig boy.

277
00:15:58,640 --> 00:16:00,517
I think maybe that's what he's striving for.

278
00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:05,549
He wants this kind of recognition of me
being a pig boy.

279
00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:12,035
- Can I dress you up as a slug?
- No.

280
00:16:12,720 --> 00:16:14,279
You say no...

281
00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:16,237
- And I mean no.
- Are you putting your foot down?

282
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:17,515
I say no and I mean no.

283
00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:21,480
Right, so, just... Just lean on me.
Lean on me.

284
00:16:21,560 --> 00:16:23,392
All right, all right.

285
00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,555
(GROANING) All right. Hang on.

286
00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:31,916
WILLIAMS: All right, quickly.

287
00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:36,232
(LAUGHING) Steve! Steve!

288
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:39,870
Right. You might have to
go round there and get it.

289
00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:44,069
Right, Nigel, lift your head up.

290
00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:48,798
Right, Nigel, right.

291
00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:52,511
Right. Now, lift your head up.
Lift your head up.

292
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:55,558
- I am lifting my head up.
- Right. Can you get down here, Steve?

293
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:57,950
- MERCHANT: Yeah, the battery's going.
- Oh, fuck. Quick.

294
00:16:58,040 --> 00:17:01,431
Lift him up. Nigel, right, look at the camera.

295
00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:05,758
- You just strangled me.
- Right, tell him what you are.

296
00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:07,678
I'm a praterpillar.

297
00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:14,639
Oh, God.

298
00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:18,190
Wiggle around, then.
Wiggle around like a praterpillar.

299
00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:31,432
Six weeks before the boys come in,
I do what is called a rough cut,

300
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:34,080
so the boys can see
how the show's coming together.

301
00:17:34,160 --> 00:17:39,030
I'd be sitting there in my edit suite watching
takes, watching Ricky's performance.

302
00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:41,157
MAN: And we're set.
MAN 2: Same board, Nigel.

303
00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:44,790
And suddenly he would break out
of character and start mentioning my name...

304
00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:47,876
He said, "Nigel," and that's put me off

305
00:17:47,960 --> 00:17:51,112
'cause I'm thinking of his little fat cheeks,
his little fat...

306
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:55,273
Big fat hamster cheeks.
Calling my mates' names out.

307
00:17:55,360 --> 00:17:57,556
You know, all that kind of stuff.
It was really weird.

308
00:17:58,840 --> 00:17:59,910
All right, Nige.

309
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:03,914
They were doing a scene in a theatre
full of 200 extras,

310
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:06,674
and I'm editing this scene
and at the end of the take,

311
00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:10,031
all these 200 audience members
turn round to camera...

312
00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:14,639
ALL: (MURMURING)
Nigel Williams, Nigel Williams...

313
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:20,714
Sorry, sorry, what are you whispering,
what are you murmuring?

314
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:29,436
I was just amazed.
I was amazed at the effort that he went to

315
00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:33,070
to get these 200 people to all do this act,
you know.

316
00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:36,676
Just the effort just to wind me up. Madness.

317
00:18:37,040 --> 00:18:39,350
- Nigel Williams looks like a stupid hamster?
- I know.

318
00:18:39,440 --> 00:18:41,272
- But how do they know?
- I don't know, I don't know.

319
00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:43,512
He's got to eat three of them in one minute.

320
00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:45,910
You were trying to smuggle in
water as well, weren't you?

321
00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:48,674
- Yeah.
- He was holding water. Right, right.

322
00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:53,550
Right, £50. Have you got the 50 on you?
'Cause I don't reckon you're gonna do this.

323
00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:56,553
- Right, lay down. Lay down.
- No. I'll write you a cheque.

324
00:18:56,640 --> 00:19:00,713
- Why do I have to lie down to eat biscuits?
- 'Cause it looks better, it's more visual.

325
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:04,316
Ricky, the night before,
had watched Celebrity Love Island

326
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:06,471
involving eating cream crackers.

327
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:09,359
And I flippantly said,
"Oh, I could do that, easy."

328
00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:15,232
Five, four, three, two, one. Go!

329
00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:16,710
Come on, Nige.

330
00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:18,871
Eating the crackers
was a lot harder than I thought.

331
00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:19,995
GERVAIS: Five seconds.

332
00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:23,038
- My mouth dried up after one.
- GERVAIS: Come on.

333
00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:27,031
I remember a lot of crumbs.
It was quite unpleasant.

334
00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:29,675
Come on. Come on.

335
00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:31,956
Come on! You've got 20 seconds left.

336
00:19:32,040 --> 00:19:34,873
You're never gonna do it.
You've got to put that last one in.

337
00:19:34,960 --> 00:19:37,998
Come on! You've got 15 seconds left, Nige.

338
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:39,195
(MUMBLING)

339
00:19:39,280 --> 00:19:41,476
Get it in! You're never gonna do it, you idiot.

340
00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:43,710
Right, you gotta swallow it.
You gotta swallow everything.

341
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,474
Right, ten, nine, eight,

342
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:50,155
seven, six, five, four,

343
00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:52,800
three, two, one.

344
00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:56,596
He couldn't do it. It's all over. It's all over!

345
00:19:56,680 --> 00:19:58,478
- How's that?
- It's all over!

346
00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:01,750
Look, he couldn't do it.

347
00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:08,474
Oh, God. You owe me 50 quid.

348
00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:13,396
I failed. And I think 50 quid was on it.

349
00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:15,511
So, anyway, it was double or quits.

350
00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:18,479
He said, "Okay, maybe you could eat
a whole fruit bowl."

351
00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:21,759
- What about that bowl of fruit?
- Up the arse?

352
00:20:23,840 --> 00:20:25,478
- What do you mean?
- Well, um...

353
00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:28,313
Well, okay. A bowl of fruit in...
How long do you reckon it'd take?

354
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:31,870
So I thought,
"Well, it's either 100 quid or quits.

355
00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:35,278
"I reckon I could do that."
And I think it was an apple,

356
00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:37,510
an orange and a banana,
or something like that.

357
00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:43,152
Right. Two minutes on the clock. Ready?
Three, two, one, go!

358
00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:45,749
Right, he's going for the banana first, okay.

359
00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:50,152
God, there it is, there it is. It's going in.
Oh, this is astounding. This is very good.

360
00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:53,517
That's only 10 seconds already,
so I think he's done this quite easy.

361
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:57,639
It was quite unpleasant 'cause I remember
necking a banana pretty quickly,

362
00:20:57,720 --> 00:21:00,030
and, yeah, I felt quite ill after that.

363
00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:01,953
Look at that, an eighth the way through.

364
00:21:02,040 --> 00:21:04,509
Look at the ears.
Get a load of the ears when he chews.

365
00:21:04,600 --> 00:21:08,833
The ears! That looks like
something you'd find in the fucking woods.

366
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:13,676
Doesn't it? He's bulging. Look at that.
Oh, God, look at that.

367
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:16,752
Right, that's 45 seconds.
This is gonna be easy, mate.

368
00:21:17,360 --> 00:21:21,354
No, keep it on the chimp. Look.
Look at that fucking chimp face!

369
00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:28,310
Don't spit any or it doesn't count.
Okay, you've got 45 seconds left.

370
00:21:28,480 --> 00:21:32,235
Oh, come on, Nige. Come on.

371
00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:36,398
Fucking hell!

372
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:39,960
No! Don't spit anything.

373
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:43,516
Right, you've got 30 seconds left.
You've really got to go for it now!

374
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:48,509
You've got... Nigel!
Come on, you've got 25 seconds.

375
00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:53,629
Shove it in, or you're down 100 quid!
You're down 100 fucking quid.

376
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:57,352
He came to work today. He can't go home!

377
00:21:57,440 --> 00:22:02,560
She wants to know, "How was it?" He'd go,
"Well, I'm full, but I've lost 100 fucking quid!"

378
00:22:03,360 --> 00:22:05,749
Come on, Nige. Come on, Nige!

379
00:22:05,880 --> 00:22:07,200
Five...

380
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:14,518
He's failed again, he's failed again!
He owes me 100 quid!

381
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:17,394
(GERVAIS LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)

382
00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:22,960
Oh, fucking hell. Oh.

383
00:22:23,240 --> 00:22:24,958
Oh, fuck me.

384
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:27,236
- I could have done that.
- Right.

385
00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:30,915
We've got to give you an easy one
to win your money back.

386
00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:32,839
100 quid, fuck me.

387
00:22:36,760 --> 00:22:39,673
Oh, I'm gonna burst. Oh.

388
00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:44,351
Anyway, the last task was
can I walk down the street with a box

389
00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:49,514
taped to my front with Special K in it,
I think it was, and milk?

390
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:53,350
You've got to go down to
that Belisha beacon there.

391
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:57,719
When I say go, you've got two minutes
to eat all that, get rid of all the milk

392
00:22:57,800 --> 00:22:59,791
and get back into this door.

393
00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:02,679
I don't know why he does it.
I don't know why he does it.

394
00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:05,799
Nige, ready?

395
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:08,109
Go!

396
00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:11,637
(GERVAIS LAUGHING)

397
00:23:25,760 --> 00:23:28,752
It was pissing down with rain,
but I thought, "I've got to do it

398
00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:31,832
"cause I owe him 150 quid,"
or whatever it was.

399
00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:35,117
It's not right. It's not right.

400
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:40,870
GERVAIS: I can't watch!
I can't watch any more.

401
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:44,876
Tell him he's won.
Tell him he's got his 100 quid back.

402
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:49,431
I walked to the end of the street and...
Yeah, I did the bet, I did the challenge.

403
00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:50,590
So who's laughing now, huh?

404
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:51,750
(PHONE RINGING)

405
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:53,672
Oh, fuck, I'm really sorry.

406
00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:57,070
WOMAN: He's covered in milk!

407
00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:58,878
(PEOPLE LAUGHING)

408
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:05,510
Gotta be able to do that.

409
00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:07,433
It's not bad.

410
00:24:09,120 --> 00:24:10,713
That was all right.

411
00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:12,552
All right? I'm done.

412
00:24:12,640 --> 00:24:17,271
- You've won. You won. Well done.
- There are some left, but...

413
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:20,120
- No, no, you've won. Well done.
- WOMAN: He's gonna stink.

414
00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:21,838
(ALL LAUGHING)