1
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CHURCH BELL RINGS

2
00:00:08,120 --> 00:00:09,600
Uncle Mirth, wait!

3
00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:13,360
They're here to help you.

4
00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:24,160
- Uncle Mirth. Please stop! 
- They've got me!
- Don't hurt him.

5
00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:25,440
Get off!

6
00:00:27,680 --> 00:00:31,200
- How could you?
- I'm so sorry, but you need help.

7
00:00:33,440 --> 00:00:36,240
Judas! I'll see you rot in hell for this!

8
00:01:14,480 --> 00:01:16,680
Are you sure you can manage that?

9
00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:20,000
I'm not completely useless.

10
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,200
Well, if you say so.

11
00:01:23,160 --> 00:01:24,520
Father Brown...

12
00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:27,560
It's from Uncle Mirth.

13
00:01:27,560 --> 00:01:29,120
He's been released.

14
00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:31,800
So he's finally regained his sanity.

15
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And hopefully forgiven me.

16
00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:36,960
He's invited me to his welcome home party.

17
00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:38,920
Well, after last time, I'd stay well away.

18
00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:41,120
He's absolutely barking.

19
00:01:41,120 --> 00:01:43,960
Always insisting on people calling him Uncle Mirth.

20
00:01:43,960 --> 00:01:46,200
Well, that's just his old stage name.

21
00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:51,480
Sorry, Mrs McCarthy.

22
00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:52,880
Not terribly hungry.

23
00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:58,280
- What's the matter with you?
- Guilt.

24
00:01:59,640 --> 00:02:02,640
About the part he played in having Uncle Mirth committed.

25
00:02:02,640 --> 00:02:04,560
They were very close.

26
00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:08,200
- Father Brown, you old bloodhound... 
- Henry!

27
00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:11,040
- How are you?
- Oh, touch of gout,

28
00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:13,560
kidney stones, pickled liver, dodgy ticker.

29
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But apart from that, a picture of health!

30
00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:22,800
- Hello, hello, hello. Who's this? 
- Lady Felicia Montague.

31
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Uncle Mirth's brother.

32
00:02:25,720 --> 00:02:28,760
Ah. I hope your sense of humour isn't as dark as his.

33
00:02:28,760 --> 00:02:31,200
Well, I did write his signature song.

34
00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:34,760
# I'm loony, hooky, kooky, loopy,

35
00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:36,200
# I'm a crackpot

36
00:02:36,200 --> 00:02:38,280
- BOTH:
- # Of the Empire! #

37
00:02:38,280 --> 00:02:42,080
Marvellous. I always found his ventriloquist's dummy rather creepy.

38
00:02:42,080 --> 00:02:43,200
Ooh! Me too.

39
00:02:44,680 --> 00:02:47,680
Looks like we're going to the same party, Father.

40
00:02:49,200 --> 00:02:50,240
Snap!

41
00:02:52,040 --> 00:02:53,080
Yes...

42
00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:57,040
Surely you're not going to the party?

43
00:02:57,040 --> 00:02:58,640
Why not?

44
00:02:58,640 --> 00:03:01,480
Well, after all that's happened...

45
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:04,200
it just wouldn't be right.

46
00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:05,280
History.

47
00:03:06,360 --> 00:03:07,760
The best brother won.

48
00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:10,360
You chose me.

49
00:03:12,240 --> 00:03:14,560
But Uncle Mirth may still be very fragile.

50
00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:16,720
How many more times?

51
00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:18,800
His name's Julius.

52
00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:19,920
Sorry.

53
00:03:21,480 --> 00:03:24,240
But since his breakdown, he hasn't seen us together.

54
00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:29,760
You just want to rub his nose in it.

55
00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:32,880
Well,

56
00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:34,640
I won't be a part of it.

57
00:03:34,640 --> 00:03:37,120
- Pack a bag.
- Mortimer...

58
00:03:38,400 --> 00:03:39,720
It's not a request.

59
00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:46,840
I want you with me.

60
00:03:56,760 --> 00:03:58,280
We leave in ten minutes, darling.

61
00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:03,760
Despite my initial doubts,

62
00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:08,080
I think putting him in that place was what he needed.

63
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:10,040
He was completely burnt out.

64
00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,120
Did you visit him often?

65
00:04:14,360 --> 00:04:17,800
- Oh. Most days.
- Your other brother?

66
00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:21,320
- Mortimer.
- Sir Mortimer now.
- Oh!

67
00:04:21,320 --> 00:04:23,960
Never set foot in the place.

68
00:04:23,960 --> 00:04:26,560
Uncle Mirth mentioned an older sister.

69
00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:32,040
Left when we were children, abroad somewhere.

70
00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:34,360
No, I was the only family to visit.

71
00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:38,160
Oh, almost forgot.

72
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:42,560
A proper drink, Father?

73
00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:47,400
A bit early, even for me.

74
00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,080
Never too early.

75
00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:50,960
Never too late.

76
00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:57,400
Port is bottled poetry.

77
00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:05,880
After my first visit, he wouldn't see me.

78
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:10,600
- Well, in the last few weeks, he did mention you.
- Did he?

79
00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:13,400
Said he was sorry for upsetting you.

80
00:05:16,680 --> 00:05:18,520
And that you did the right thing.

81
00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,800
CLAXON

82
00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:34,320
Sorry, honey, did I startle you?

83
00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:35,920
You could've killed me.

84
00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:38,840
It's Jacob, isn't it?

85
00:05:38,840 --> 00:05:41,480
You interviewed me for Uncle Mirth's biography.

86
00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:45,880
You're the radio producer.

87
00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:47,800
So you're going to his party too?

88
00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:48,960
Yeah.

89
00:05:48,960 --> 00:05:51,960
Well, park your seat. I'll give you a ride.

90
00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:04,280
So, how's the biography going?

91
00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:06,360
I'm hoping to pick it up again now that he's out.

92
00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:08,440
Don't hold your breath.

93
00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:12,320
You do know his mother and sister both had...problems.

94
00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:15,760
How did you know that?

95
00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:19,520
Oh, men always tell me everything. Can't think why.

96
00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:24,880
Sorry about the bare feet. Can't drive in heels.

97
00:06:32,280 --> 00:06:35,280
- See you at the party, Father. 
- Bye, Henry.

98
00:06:35,280 --> 00:06:37,880
# I'm a crackpot of the Empire

99
00:06:37,880 --> 00:06:41,480
# Mad as a hatter!

100
00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:44,640
# I'm loony, hooky, kooky, loopy... #

101
00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:45,880
Oh, hello again.

102
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:48,200
# I'm a crackpot of the Empire... #

103
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:49,560
Thank you so much(!)

104
00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:51,680
HE LAUGHS

105
00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:57,680
Help! Someone!

106
00:06:57,680 --> 00:06:59,720
HE GASPS

107
00:07:01,360 --> 00:07:02,840
Are you all right?

108
00:07:04,840 --> 00:07:07,080
SHE SCREAMS

109
00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:20,360
With all his millions, he buys a dump like this?

110
00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:23,160
Last time I interviewed him,

111
00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:26,080
he said he wanted to build a centre for music hall memorabilia.

112
00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:34,720
Sorry, thought you needed a helping hand.

113
00:07:37,320 --> 00:07:39,200
Maybe he'll finish it now he's back.

114
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:46,080
DISTANT, EXAGGERATED LAUGHING

115
00:07:46,080 --> 00:07:48,760
- What's that?
- Uncle Mirth?

116
00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:51,720
EXAGGERATED LAUGHING CONTINUES

117
00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:57,800
In the pocket.

118
00:07:57,800 --> 00:08:01,280
EXAGGERATED LAUGHING

119
00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:03,760
Looks like Uncle Mirth's been playing a joke on us.

120
00:08:08,960 --> 00:08:11,560
It's addressed to someone called Father Brown.

121
00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:16,080
He was very jolly when he left.

122
00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:19,360
Lady Felicia said he was holding his chest and struggling to breathe

123
00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:20,840
when he collapsed.

124
00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:22,760
Henry wasn't in the best of shape.

125
00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:25,280
And a big drinker.

126
00:08:26,720 --> 00:08:30,920
So, "Fat alcoholic dies of natural causes."

127
00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:34,320
Nice!

128
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,080
And...simple.

129
00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:43,000
Just the way I like it. Sergeant!

130
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:46,040
Father, are you all right?

131
00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:47,840
Yes.

132
00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:50,240
- Poor Henry.
- You're upset.

133
00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:54,040
Now, maybe going to that party is not such a good idea.

134
00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:56,840
I need to tell Uncle Mirth about his brother.

135
00:08:56,840 --> 00:09:00,760
Well, if that's the case, I'm going with you. Moral support.

136
00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:01,880
Thank you.

137
00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:06,440
All the doors are locked. We can't get inside.

138
00:09:07,640 --> 00:09:10,320
Oh, you stupid woman!

139
00:09:10,320 --> 00:09:12,800
- My camera's in there.
- Sorry.

140
00:09:14,440 --> 00:09:18,440
- Father Brown, my dear chap. 
- Sir Mortimer.
- Good to see you.

141
00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:19,600
Mrs McCarthy.

142
00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:22,920
I'm afraid neither of my brothers have made an appearance.

143
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:25,000
Unfortunately, I have bad news for you.

144
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:27,160
Your brother Henry died this morning.

145
00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:28,920
A suspected heart attack.

146
00:09:28,920 --> 00:09:30,720
- What?!
- I'm so sorry.

147
00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:35,480
Damn fool!

148
00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:38,120
I told him to stop drinking.

149
00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:40,640
He's at the Kembleford cottage hospital.

150
00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:41,680
Are you all right?

151
00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:44,560
Fine.

152
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:49,160
I'm just glad you're here.

153
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:56,480
Father Brown. This is for you.

154
00:09:57,720 --> 00:09:58,800
I found it over there.

155
00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:02,080
Well, what is it?

156
00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:10,000
It's a death certificate.

157
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:13,800
With my name on it.

158
00:10:17,320 --> 00:10:18,440
Sir!

159
00:10:20,160 --> 00:10:23,040
He must have picked these up this morning.

160
00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:24,760
They should promote you to detective.

161
00:10:27,240 --> 00:10:29,080
Bill, bill...

162
00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:35,160
What's this?

163
00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:39,560
A death certificate?

164
00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:44,680
With Henry's name on it.

165
00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:46,880
"Cause of death, poison."

166
00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:50,880
Not looking so much like a heart attack anymore.

167
00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:55,480
What? A death certificate?

168
00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:57,640
Father, we should leave here immediately.

169
00:10:57,640 --> 00:11:00,880
- Oh, don't be such a silly old woman. 
- I beg your pardon?

170
00:11:00,880 --> 00:11:03,480
I don't think you should speak to a lady like that.

171
00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:04,880
Steady, tiger.

172
00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:07,160
All I'm saying is that it's typical Julius,

173
00:11:07,160 --> 00:11:09,920
playing jokes on his family and friends.

174
00:11:09,920 --> 00:11:11,480
I'm not so sure.

175
00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:13,960
He's always had a warped sense of humour.

176
00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:15,240
He'll pop up in a minute.

177
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:17,640
Laughing at us all.

178
00:11:23,560 --> 00:11:25,200
Father.

179
00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:27,080
Do you really think it's from Uncle Mirth?

180
00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,240
Why would he do this?

181
00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:33,600
It's clear he's as mad as ever he was.

182
00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:36,120
And he still bears you a grudge.

183
00:11:36,120 --> 00:11:37,240
Remember...

184
00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:39,520
I had to tell them where you were hiding.

185
00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,600
When you had a breakdown,

186
00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:45,120
I thought you might do something terrible to yourself.

187
00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:55,040
Are you sure you want to stay?

188
00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:58,040
Yes.

189
00:11:58,040 --> 00:11:59,240
I owe it to Uncle Mirth...

190
00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:01,600
..to try and help him.

191
00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:05,160
- SIR MORTIMER:
- Another one!

192
00:12:11,960 --> 00:12:13,920
Another one. What did I tell you?

193
00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:16,320
My brother is as nutty as a fruitcake.

194
00:12:16,320 --> 00:12:17,520
Where did you find it?

195
00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:21,520
- I found it on the bottom step. 
- Didn't you find the other one too?

196
00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:25,200
What are you saying? That I'm somehow in on Uncle Mirth's joke?

197
00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:26,800
No. Sorry.

198
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:29,280
That door's open.

199
00:12:30,640 --> 00:12:32,800
I've had enough of playing silly beggars...

200
00:12:32,800 --> 00:12:36,800
- Excuse me! 
- Maybe we shouldn't go up...

201
00:12:39,280 --> 00:12:40,360
Julius!

202
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:42,920
Are you up there?

203
00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:46,320
Well, he's bound to be up here somewhere.

204
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:04,080
- He's not in there. 
- He must be here somewhere.

205
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:10,000
Julius!

206
00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:14,280
Come out, you bloody fool!

207
00:13:14,280 --> 00:13:18,200
Always loved hide and seek. Something about dark corners.

208
00:13:19,240 --> 00:13:20,480
Uncle Mirth?

209
00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:23,600
His name's Julius.

210
00:13:46,320 --> 00:13:48,200
If you ever need to chat about Henry...

211
00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:49,800
Oh, thank you, Father.

212
00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,480
If I'm honest, we were never close.

213
00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:55,880
Perhaps he got a death certificate too.

214
00:13:55,880 --> 00:13:58,760
Look, there's nothing sinister about all of this.

215
00:13:58,760 --> 00:14:02,200
Julius once had an obituary printed in the paper,

216
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:04,400
telling everyone he'd died.

217
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:07,560
- I remember that. 
- It's all about craving attention.

218
00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:10,680
Creating an audience.

219
00:14:11,760 --> 00:14:13,040
- JACOB:
- Over here!

220
00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:23,080
It's been locked!

221
00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:27,800
- Did you see anyone?
- No.

222
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,680
Why did you even try the door?

223
00:14:30,680 --> 00:14:33,600
I just came round the corridor and saw it was closed.

224
00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:36,720
So, you're accusing him now? What is it with you?

225
00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:39,240
I'm just trying to make sense of it all.

226
00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:40,560
Here, let me try.

227
00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:45,200
It won't budge.

228
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:48,440
- There must be another way out. 
- We need to search all the rooms.

229
00:14:55,840 --> 00:14:59,560
This is looking less and less like an Uncle Mirth joke.

230
00:15:09,280 --> 00:15:11,720
- I do not like this one little bit. 
- No.

231
00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:16,280
Father Brown, look.

232
00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:21,040
And greetings to you, Mr Kafka.

233
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:24,760
Don't suppose you know the way out of here, do you?

234
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:29,240
One of Uncle Mirth's hilarious pranks, no doubt.

235
00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:34,920
Do you know? I have always wondered how these things work.

236
00:15:34,920 --> 00:15:36,160
Me too.

237
00:15:46,600 --> 00:15:48,160
Ow!

238
00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:51,400
- Are you all right? 
- Oh, it's...it's nothing.

239
00:15:54,280 --> 00:15:57,520
There are needles, just inside the opening.

240
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,520
Meant for me, no doubt.

241
00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:07,160
I've been to the end of the corridor.

242
00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:08,480
There's no second stairway.

243
00:16:10,320 --> 00:16:12,800
So, how do you know my brother?

244
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:18,240
He agreed to be in a radio show I produced.

245
00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:20,760
We became quite close.

246
00:16:20,760 --> 00:16:21,880
Close?

247
00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:27,960
Is that how you normally secure your bookings?

248
00:16:31,520 --> 00:16:33,000
Actually, it is.

249
00:16:35,320 --> 00:16:39,000
I've slept with so many men, I've lost count.

250
00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:42,640
Dozens and dozens.

251
00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:45,480
You see, I'm just not fussy.

252
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,000
But I wouldn't go near a pig like you.

253
00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:14,880
- Do you miss him?
- What?

254
00:17:16,560 --> 00:17:19,200
- Uncle Mirth.
- Why would you say that?

255
00:17:19,200 --> 00:17:21,120
I did a lot of interviews with him.

256
00:17:22,280 --> 00:17:25,800
- He always spoke about you.
- Did he?

257
00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:26,960
The love of his life...

258
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:30,200
..who left him for his brother.

259
00:17:33,360 --> 00:17:35,440
Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you. I'm...

260
00:17:36,880 --> 00:17:39,200
- I'm always saying the wrong things. 
- It's all right.

261
00:17:41,280 --> 00:17:43,960
He was convinced you still loved him.

262
00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:47,600
I just couldn't take any more, his moods.

263
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:49,120
One minute up, the next...

264
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:52,080
He was always close to breaking.

265
00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:56,800
Why Sir Mortimer?

266
00:17:58,200 --> 00:17:59,840
It won't be for much longer.

267
00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:01,800
FOOTSTEPS

268
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,880
- Any luck?
- Ah, afraid not.

269
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:13,680
Looks like Uncle Mirth wants us to watch something.

270
00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:17,440
Sir Mortimer, Eve...

271
00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:21,080
What is it?

272
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:25,680
A film?

273
00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:27,760
- This is becoming absurd.
- Shh!

274
00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:40,120
# I'm a crackpot of the Empire

275
00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:42,320
# Mad as a hatter

276
00:18:42,320 --> 00:18:45,000
# I'm loony, hooky, loopy, kooky!

277
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,200
# I'm a crackpot of the Empire. #

278
00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:55,480
Well, thank you for attending my welcome home party.

279
00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:58,840
The only thought that kept me going in that madhouse

280
00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:02,440
was the thought of taking my revenge on the people that put me in there.

281
00:19:03,560 --> 00:19:07,480
My two brothers and my friend, Father Brown.

282
00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:14,560
Mm!

283
00:19:16,360 --> 00:19:18,720
I assume my brother Henry didn't make it this far.

284
00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:24,520
Pathetic alcoholic, he was always going to be the easiest to kill.

285
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:29,280
A bottle of poison-laced port sent to him will doubtless do the trick.

286
00:19:30,360 --> 00:19:32,280
My other brother, Sir Mortimer.

287
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:36,120
You will die from your own selfishness.

288
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,560
And Father Brown...

289
00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:42,360
You will be killed by your own curiosity.

290
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:50,440
If all does not go to plan, well,

291
00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:52,480
you will all fall to your death anyway.

292
00:19:53,960 --> 00:19:57,040
This building has been condemned

293
00:19:57,040 --> 00:20:00,240
and the ground will soon give way beneath you.

294
00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:07,480
- We're all going to die!
- Shut up.

295
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,880
But it's true. We're trapped.

296
00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:14,520
May I remind you that we all entered via a fire escape.

297
00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:19,280
- So, there is another way out. 
- He's right.

298
00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:24,520
We need to slowly and calmly search again.

299
00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:26,720
We've looked everywhere!

300
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:28,040
Will you just button it?

301
00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:31,560
Check behind furniture for anything hidden.

302
00:20:38,240 --> 00:20:39,880
I didn't want to believe it was him.

303
00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:43,080
It will be all right, won't it, Father?

304
00:20:44,920 --> 00:20:46,160
Of course.

305
00:20:50,760 --> 00:20:52,920
Update on the dead bloke?

306
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:57,560
Lady Felicia said Henry's brother is throwing a party up at the old mill.

307
00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:00,320
Goes by the name of Uncle Mirth.

308
00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:03,320
Uncle Mirth? You having a laugh?

309
00:21:03,320 --> 00:21:04,880
No, sir.

310
00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:08,080
Sounds like some dodgy scout master.

311
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:09,560
Get the car.

312
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:10,600
Please?

313
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:24,520
I've found something!

314
00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:29,760
Looks like a goods lift.

315
00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:31,720
Well, there doesn't seem to be much room.

316
00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:33,960
We'll have to go down one at a time.

317
00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:36,320
Excuse me.

318
00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:37,960
Why should you go first?

319
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:39,760
I'm not staying here a moment longer.

320
00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:44,360
Sir Mortimer. Wait...

321
00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:51,560
HE SCREAMS

322
00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:54,360
LIFT CRASHES

323
00:21:54,360 --> 00:21:55,880
No!

324
00:22:02,080 --> 00:22:03,800
The cables must have been cut.

325
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:07,240
"You will die by your own selfishness."

326
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,960
Father, if this floor collapses,

327
00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:13,200
we'll all end up like...

328
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:15,880
This place isn't condemned.

329
00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:17,160
- Too solid.
- Oh.

330
00:22:24,880 --> 00:22:27,400
SHE SOBS

331
00:22:42,240 --> 00:22:43,920
I've said a prayer for him.

332
00:22:45,160 --> 00:22:47,760
My tears aren't for Mortimer.

333
00:22:47,760 --> 00:22:49,120
They're for Uncle Mirth.

334
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:52,520
It's all my fault he's doing this.

335
00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:59,000
Leaving him caused his breakdown.

336
00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:00,680
It unhinged him.

337
00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:07,160
You are not to blame.

338
00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:10,960
Perhaps the asylum pushed him over the edge.

339
00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:12,960
SHATTERING GLASS

340
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:17,200
Mrs McCarthy, are you all right?

341
00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:22,280
I don't know, I...I'm feeling most peculiar.

342
00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:25,440
- What is it?
- I...I can't breathe.

343
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,160
- I think you've been poisoned.
- Huh?

344
00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:38,440
Mrs McCarthy's collapsed!

345
00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:40,720
- EVE:
- There's a door. Help me!

346
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:45,320
We need to find a telephone.

347
00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:07,440
We must be in the cellar by now.

348
00:24:11,800 --> 00:24:13,320
It's locked! Come on.

349
00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:19,080
We will a find a way out, I promise.

350
00:24:19,080 --> 00:24:20,480
Mrs McCarthy?

351
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:31,600
Up here! We're trapped.

352
00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:33,960
Try that door.

353
00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:37,320
Mrs McCarthy needs medical help, urgently!

354
00:24:37,320 --> 00:24:38,880
Hang on!

355
00:24:41,120 --> 00:24:42,400
It's locked, sir.

356
00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:45,360
We've found a door to the cellars.

357
00:24:45,360 --> 00:24:47,680
Can you get down there and open it from the other side?

358
00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:52,240
- No, this one too.
- Out the way.

359
00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:00,280
Come on!

360
00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:09,760
Goodbye, Father.

361
00:25:21,040 --> 00:25:22,880
HE SOBS

362
00:25:37,360 --> 00:25:38,480
Thank you, Doctor.

363
00:25:42,800 --> 00:25:44,560
Well?

364
00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:45,880
See for yourself.

365
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:54,920
This is the worst cup of tea I've ever had.

366
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:58,720
You'll need to let the pot stand for at least two minutes before pouring.

367
00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:04,000
The first death certificate was found over there.

368
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:06,280
Was it really necessary to bring us back?

369
00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:08,240
Need to get a clear picture.

370
00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:11,960
Now, what I don't understand is why you three were invited?

371
00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:14,000
I mean, you weren't the intended victims.

372
00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:18,360
Uncle Mirth was a showman. He always craved an audience.

373
00:26:18,360 --> 00:26:20,640
And with me a producer and Jacob a writer,

374
00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:24,120
he knew we'd tell his story to an even bigger audience.

375
00:26:24,120 --> 00:26:27,280
It was Sir Mortimer who insisted I come.

376
00:26:27,280 --> 00:26:29,160
Show me where you found the second one.

377
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:36,280
You said yesterday...

378
00:26:37,760 --> 00:26:40,680
..about not being with Sir Mortimer for much longer.

379
00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:42,040
Well, I...

380
00:26:42,040 --> 00:26:45,240
I just meant that I was planning to leave him.

381
00:26:45,240 --> 00:26:47,600
Surely you don't think I had anything to do with...?

382
00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:50,600
Of course not.

383
00:26:56,040 --> 00:26:58,040
I'm so pleased you're feeling better, Mrs M.

384
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:01,360
I'm absolutely fine. No need for all this fuss.

385
00:27:01,360 --> 00:27:02,440
You were poisoned.

386
00:27:03,520 --> 00:27:05,680
The needles in the dummy were doused in it.

387
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,000
Thank goodness the inspector got you here in time.

388
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,200
A repellent little man, to say the least.

389
00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:13,240
But you can't fault what he did.

390
00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:14,440
The poison was meant for me.

391
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:16,840
I'm so sorry.

392
00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:18,120
Don't be silly, Father!

393
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:22,960
The inspector wants me back at the mill now.

394
00:27:22,960 --> 00:27:26,720
But...let me cook lunch for you.

395
00:27:26,720 --> 00:27:29,240
Oh! Lovely.

396
00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:34,000
In the meantime, please try and get some rest.

397
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:35,520
I'll look after her, Father.

398
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:38,520
I'm not an invalid. I don't need looking after.

399
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:41,280
Now, you're not going to be a difficult patient, are you, Mrs M?

400
00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:44,600
'My other brother, Sir Mortimer,

401
00:27:44,600 --> 00:27:47,280
'you will die from your own selfishness.

402
00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:50,720
'And Father Brown..'

403
00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:53,320
You will be killed by your own curiosity.

404
00:27:57,520 --> 00:28:00,320
'If all does not go to plan, well,

405
00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:02,480
'you will all fall to your death anyway.'

406
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:03,920
You're not allowed up here.

407
00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:05,360
'This building has been...'

408
00:28:05,360 --> 00:28:07,840
- I thought you wanted to see me. 
- Too late now.

409
00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:11,080
Got what I needed from the others.

410
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:17,120
- Dusty cellar.
- So...

411
00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:19,720
Any sign of Uncle Mirth?

412
00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:22,480
Not that it's any of your business,

413
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:24,400
but that maniac is still on the loose.

414
00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:28,080
That maniac might be an ill man.

415
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:31,400
Tell that to the twisted corpse of Sir Mortimer.

416
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:35,200
On the screen,

417
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:38,320
I thought I noticed Uncle Mirth flinch

418
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:40,320
when we heard that click.

419
00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:43,920
A click?

420
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:47,680
Could have been anything - door, window, light switch...

421
00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:48,760
Or a gun.

422
00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:52,320
Perhaps he made his speech under duress...

423
00:28:52,320 --> 00:28:54,600
YELLS: Are you trying to tell me how to do my job?

424
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:55,960
- No, I...
- Good.

425
00:28:57,000 --> 00:29:00,680
Now get out of here before I arrest you for being a pain in the backside.

426
00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:11,080
Well, I certainly would.

427
00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:19,080
Oh, come on, don't tell me it hasn't crossed your mind.

428
00:29:19,080 --> 00:29:22,520
At a time like this, how can you even think about such things?

429
00:29:24,920 --> 00:29:27,640
Wouldn't be the first time we've both liked the same man.

430
00:29:29,320 --> 00:29:30,560
You mean Uncle Mirth?

431
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:38,160
So Mr Writer, fancy another ride?

432
00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:39,920
Uh, no, thank you.

433
00:29:39,920 --> 00:29:42,920
- The sergeant's giving me a lift. 
- Jacob...

434
00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:45,200
During your research for Uncle Mirth's biography,

435
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,680
did you discover what happened to his sister?

436
00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:48,880
She was unhinged.

437
00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:52,480
She died abroad last year.

438
00:29:52,480 --> 00:29:54,520
Suspected suicide.

439
00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:55,560
So...

440
00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:59,520
His siblings are dead and he's missing.

441
00:29:59,520 --> 00:30:02,960
You think it's some kind of vendetta against the family?

442
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:06,080
- Possibly.
- But you were named in the film footage, Father.

443
00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:08,400
Mm...

444
00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:10,400
Yes, I was.

445
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:13,960
Yes, sir, we've searched the surrounding areas.

446
00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:15,560
But there's no sign of Uncle Mirth.

447
00:30:15,560 --> 00:30:18,160
He's not going to stay around waiting to be caught, is he?

448
00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:21,200
Let's search Kembleford and the surrounding area.

449
00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:22,280
Yes, sir.

450
00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:30,320
HE CLICKS HIS TONGUE

451
00:31:57,160 --> 00:31:58,200
Ah!

452
00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:50,320
Old, dusty.

453
00:32:54,680 --> 00:32:55,840
New.

454
00:33:12,760 --> 00:33:13,960
Uncle Mirth.

455
00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:19,200
SNORING

456
00:33:21,800 --> 00:33:22,840
Oh, yeah.

457
00:33:25,280 --> 00:33:28,320
Oh! Outrageous.

458
00:33:32,880 --> 00:33:34,960
SHE SNORES LOUDLY Ah!

459
00:33:37,480 --> 00:33:40,240
- What was that?
- Nothing.

460
00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:43,240
Just the gentle rumblings of a combine harvester.

461
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:45,120
You're looking a little flushed.

462
00:33:45,120 --> 00:33:47,520
It's rather hot in here. Can we open the window?

463
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:53,080
Heavens above, look at the time. And where's Father Brown got to?

464
00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:54,480
Well, he hasn't come back yet.

465
00:33:54,480 --> 00:33:57,080
You know what he's like, he's probably sleuthing somewhere.

466
00:33:57,080 --> 00:33:59,160
He said he was going to prepare the luncheon.

467
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:01,200
And he never misses a meal.

468
00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:04,680
And now...now I'm hungry and worried.

469
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:10,360
You're safe now. I'll get you some help.

470
00:34:10,360 --> 00:34:12,760
GUN CLICKS

471
00:34:17,080 --> 00:34:18,680
I was wondering when you'd turn up.

472
00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:24,960
You framed Uncle Mirth for his brothers' murders,

473
00:34:24,960 --> 00:34:29,800
set up the sick jokes in keeping with his public pranks

474
00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:31,400
and invited people to witness them.

475
00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:34,680
But Uncle Mirth,

476
00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:37,240
who is not as comical as you may think,

477
00:34:37,240 --> 00:34:39,040
left a number of clues to your identity.

478
00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:42,280
All right, I'll say what you want.

479
00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,160
I'll need a drink first.

480
00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:58,400
While your back was turned, he put a pin in the globe.

481
00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:03,960
Ireland.

482
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:06,440
And the beverage he chose.

483
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:08,880
Irish stout.

484
00:35:15,960 --> 00:35:17,760
I saw you hiding in the grounds, Father.

485
00:35:19,800 --> 00:35:21,040
How did you know where he was?

486
00:35:22,720 --> 00:35:24,000
Dusty cellar.

487
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,680
Dust, from the cellar.

488
00:35:33,240 --> 00:35:35,680
Immured, walled in.

489
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:39,480
Nasty death, suffocation.

490
00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:44,160
It's a ventilation shaft.

491
00:35:49,960 --> 00:35:51,000
So...

492
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:55,680
Your pose as Uncle Mirth's biographer

493
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:58,200
was just a ploy to get information?

494
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:00,640
If you're not a writer...

495
00:36:03,040 --> 00:36:04,080
..who are you?

496
00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:09,360
Another crackpot of the Empire.

497
00:36:11,920 --> 00:36:12,960
The Empire?

498
00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:18,280
Ah, the family.

499
00:36:19,520 --> 00:36:21,120
Is this all about inheritance?

500
00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:23,320
Yep.

501
00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:25,920
Did you put me in your will?

502
00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:28,560
He...

503
00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:31,160
he said he was indebted to you for helping him.

504
00:36:32,600 --> 00:36:36,520
So with me and the brothers dead, you stood to inherit everything.

505
00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:41,440
All right, it's time you were told the truth.

506
00:36:44,760 --> 00:36:46,440
I'm your sister's son.

507
00:36:48,360 --> 00:36:51,040
She married an Irish labourer,

508
00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:52,400
but their father disowned her.

509
00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:55,160
She was dead to him.

510
00:36:55,160 --> 00:36:57,000
I... I didn't know...

511
00:36:57,000 --> 00:36:59,520
Oh, and that makes it right?!

512
00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:02,000
While you and your brothers lived like kings,

513
00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:04,880
we were starving in some rat-infested slum.

514
00:37:06,360 --> 00:37:09,320
But it's not their fault. Is it?

515
00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:12,800
As Henry said,

516
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:14,800
they were children when their sister left.

517
00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:16,320
This isn't about revenge!

518
00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:20,120
I'm taking back what my mother...

519
00:37:21,360 --> 00:37:22,600
What I was denied.

520
00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:29,240
All my life, I have fantasised about killing them and inheriting it all.

521
00:37:29,240 --> 00:37:30,520
Killing them?

522
00:37:32,920 --> 00:37:35,440
Is the family fortune worth that much to you?

523
00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:37,560
Fortune?

524
00:37:39,240 --> 00:37:41,240
Oh, you've no idea, do you, Father?

525
00:37:42,240 --> 00:37:44,200
They're worth millions.

526
00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:45,520
It truly is an empire.

527
00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:56,120
What would your mother think about all this?

528
00:37:57,800 --> 00:37:59,640
I'm doing it for her!

529
00:38:03,560 --> 00:38:05,080
She hung herself.

530
00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:10,480
She's buried in a pauper's grave.

531
00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:13,720
I couldn't even afford a headstone.

532
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:18,480
HE SOBS

533
00:38:18,480 --> 00:38:19,560
I'm sorry.

534
00:38:21,080 --> 00:38:22,280
Well, he's not in St Mary's.

535
00:38:22,280 --> 00:38:24,120
I've looked everywhere I can think of.

536
00:38:24,120 --> 00:38:27,080
- You should go back and rest. 
- I am not going anywhere until I...

537
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:28,160
Inspector!

538
00:38:30,560 --> 00:38:32,960
It's Father Brown, he hasn't come back from the mill.

539
00:38:32,960 --> 00:38:34,640
Snooping around, no doubt...

540
00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:36,120
He might be in danger.

541
00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:39,200
Well, if he's not, he will be when I get my hands on him.

542
00:38:39,200 --> 00:38:40,800
Goodfellow, come on.

543
00:38:47,040 --> 00:38:50,280
She never got over what happened.

544
00:38:50,280 --> 00:38:53,960
Years of depression, mental problems.

545
00:38:56,360 --> 00:38:59,640
She was always begging me to take back what was rightfully hers.

546
00:39:06,400 --> 00:39:07,760
I promised her!

547
00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:12,600
And I can't let some priest ruin it.

548
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:16,680
But what have you done, Jacob?

549
00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:19,560
Look at him.

550
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:22,720
He's your uncle.

551
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:25,640
I had to keep him alive until

552
00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:27,920
all the other beneficiaries of the will were dead.

553
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:33,800
But you must know...

554
00:39:33,800 --> 00:39:35,880
you won't get away with this?

555
00:39:35,880 --> 00:39:37,120
Won't I?

556
00:39:38,480 --> 00:39:41,320
"Crazy Uncle Mirth kills Father Brown as he said he would...

557
00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:46,760
"..then kills himself."

558
00:39:49,440 --> 00:39:51,080
That'll be good enough for the police.

559
00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:01,800
Please. Don't do that.

560
00:40:10,920 --> 00:40:12,560
This way.

561
00:40:20,240 --> 00:40:24,600
- Please. Give me the gun.
- No!

562
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:27,640
I have to do this.

563
00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:28,880
It's for my mother.

564
00:40:30,600 --> 00:40:33,680
But if you pull the trigger and kill me,

565
00:40:33,680 --> 00:40:35,320
then he'll kill you.

566
00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:38,920
But if you give me the gun,

567
00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:40,840
I'll persuade him to put his down.

568
00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:46,080
I can't...

569
00:40:47,840 --> 00:40:49,520
That's your only option to stay alive.

570
00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:53,440
Do you want to die?

571
00:40:59,920 --> 00:41:02,560
Uncle Mirth, please lower your gun.

572
00:41:02,560 --> 00:41:04,320
COCKS GUN

573
00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:06,840
Uncle Mirth, it is over.

574
00:41:09,120 --> 00:41:10,880
Don't.

575
00:41:12,280 --> 00:41:13,640
Please...

576
00:41:16,920 --> 00:41:18,960
You know this is wrong.

577
00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:22,920
No!

578
00:41:22,920 --> 00:41:24,280
Ah!

579
00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:25,400
- MALLORY:
- Padre...

580
00:41:26,360 --> 00:41:27,600
What the...?

581
00:41:27,600 --> 00:41:28,880
Um...

582
00:41:30,840 --> 00:41:32,920
Inspector, would you mind taking this, please?

583
00:41:32,920 --> 00:41:34,160
I believe it's loaded.

584
00:41:37,760 --> 00:41:38,840
Thank you.

585
00:41:49,360 --> 00:41:50,520
It's all right.

586
00:41:54,040 --> 00:41:55,200
It'll be all right.

587
00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,280
# I'm loony, loopy hooky, kooky!

588
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:03,000
# I'm a crackpot of the Empire! #

589
00:42:06,320 --> 00:42:09,680
One of these days, you're going to get killed for real.

590
00:42:09,680 --> 00:42:12,240
You're as mad as that lunatic in the hospital.

591
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:24,640
I just hope that Jacob hasn't pushed Uncle Mirth back into insanity.

592
00:42:27,120 --> 00:42:29,640
LAUGHTER

593
00:42:34,080 --> 00:42:38,320
Now, what did Inspector Mallory say to his belly button?

594
00:42:38,320 --> 00:42:39,400
You're under a vest!

595
00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:43,400
Looks sane enough to me, back to normal.

596
00:42:43,400 --> 00:42:45,040
Crackpot of the Empire.

597
00:42:45,040 --> 00:42:48,360
Now, what do you call a bishop when he sleepwalks?

598
00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:49,840
A roamin' Catholic!

599
00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:51,800
ALL LAUGH

600
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:56,520
Why is Father Brown laughing? Mass hysteria!

601
00:42:56,520 --> 00:42:59,480
ALL LAUGH