[theme music]
♪ Ah ah ah ♪
♪ Ah ♪
♪ Whatever happened
to predictability ♪
♪ The milkman
the paper boy ♪
♪ Evening TV ♪
♪ How did I get
to living it here ♪
♪ Somebody tell me please ♪
♪ This old world's
confusing me ♪
♪ Clouds as mean as
you've ever seen ♪
♪ There ain't a bird
who knows your tune ♪
♪ Then a little voice
inside you whispers ♪
♪ Kid don't sell
your dreams so soon ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere ♪
♪ There's a heart ♪
♪ A hand to hold on to ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere ♪
♪ There's a face ♪
♪ Of somebody who needs you ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ When you're
lost out there ♪
♪ And you're all alone ♪
♪ A light is waiting
to carry you home ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Doobie doo ba bah dah ♪♪
[instrumental music]
Gobble, gobble, gobble,
gobble, gobble.
Gobble, gobble,
gobble, gobble, gobble.
Happy Thanksgiving, Michelle.
Today, you have
an opportunity
that only comes around once
in your career as a baby.
You can blow everyone away
at Thanksgiving dinner
by uttering one simple word..
...Turkey.
Turkey.
Turkey, turkey,
turkey, turkey.
Turkey, turkey, turkey.
I'm sorry. You don't need
this kind of pressure, do you?
[snoring]
(Danny)
'Happy Thanksgiving.'
Why is there
a butterball on my head?
Jesse, apparently your hair
is some sort of baby magnet.
Man, it's 7 o'clock.
It's a holiday.
'Good night.'
Jesse, I am sorry
but I've got a little problem
and I need to see you and Joey
downstairs right now.
Argh!
Come on.
I gotta get a lock for my door.
- Ah.
- We're coming to some stairs.
I recommend you
opening your eyes.
[snoring]
Joey, come on, wake up, buddy.
Good morning.
How are you guys doing?
Boy, it's great to be alive!
Happy Thanksgiving, buddy.
Why can't you wake up grumpy
and grouchy like normal people?
Because it's a beautiful day.
Boys, brace yourselves.
It's snowing in Tacoma.
No!
Boy, it's a good thing I didn't
sleep through that news.
You don't understand, my mom
lives in Tacoma
and she's snowed in.
She was supposed to make
our thanksgiving dinner for us.
It's no problem. We'll make that
seven-course meal ourselves.
How, you ask?
The miracle..
[imitates trumpet fanfare]
...of Thanksgiving.
You..
[imitates trumpet fanfare]
...are a moron.
There's the miracle of Christmas
and there's "Smokey Robinson
and the miracles"
there's "miracle whip.."
But there's no miracle
of Thanksgiving, huh?
Oh, no? Suppose the pilgrims
had landed in Florida..
We'd all be eating Flamingo.
All I know is...everything today
has to be absolutely perfect.
Why?
Because it's the girls' first
thanksgiving without
their mother.
Oh, that's right, man.
It's gotta be rough on them.
We gotta, we gotta
make this a fun day.
We gotta make it a great day
for these girls.
And it will be.
- You know why?
- Why?
The miracle..
[imitates trumpet fanfare]
...of Thanksgiving.
Now let's get
in there and cook!
Right and right after that,
we'll hunt for eggs
left by the Thanksgiving bunny.
Okay, everything's on the table
and ready for cooking.
What should we make first?
Reservations.
I know this looks
a little intimidating
but families all over
this great country
are turning
these raw ingredients
into a thanksgiving feast.
Maybe we should go
have dinner with one of them.
Nobody panic.
We've got cookbooks.
If you can read English,
you can cook.
For instance,
"basic bread stuffing."
"Melt 1/3 cup butter
in a heavy skillet."
That's easy.
On the stove, right?
No, no, no, we stick
the butter on a rocket ship
and send it to the sun.
Alright, guys,
stay with me here.
"Add 1/4 cup
finely minced onion."
Uh-oh.
We've got three different
kinds of onion here.
Uh-oh.
Are there any pictures?
Well, here's one of
Betty Crocker but they cut
her off above the onions.
- Aww.
Okay. "Stir in four cups
bread crumbs.
"See pages 35 to 37.
"Two cups chicken stock.
See pages 46 to 48.
"One pound pork sausage.
See pages 78 to 81.."
Stuffing is highly overrated.
Hey, mister, what happened
to the miracle..
Doo doo doo-do, with
the horn thing at Thanksgiving?
If we can get a restaurant
reservation on Thanksgiving..
...there's your miracle.
Right.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Look out. Here comes
big bad Bikomola.
Michelle. Michelle.
Pop a wheelie.
'Alright!'
See? Taught her
everything I know.
Oh.
Girls, I have a little bad news.
It's snowing up North
and grandma can't make it.
- Aww.
- Oh, no.
But don't worry
because we're gonna go
to the best restaurant in town
and have a super great
Thanksgiving feast.
Okay, it's quiz time.
How is Thanksgiving gonna be?
Super great!
Ding ding ding ding ding!
That's correct.
And now D.J. to tie,
how is Thanksgiving gonna be?
[imitates buzzer]
Time's up.
What do I win?
Steph, how could you say
that sounds "super great?"
I think the idea stinks.
Can I change my vote?
D.J., what's wrong?
Mom always cooked us
a home-cooked meal
for Thanksgiving.
Don't you think we should
have Thanksgiving here?
Yeah, we're just
a little bit nervous
about turning all this
food into something
that can still be eaten.
Last year, mom taught me
how to make her
picture-perfect pumpkin pie.
'So I can make that.'
And I can help.
And I talked to grandma
last night on the phone
and she was gonna put me
in charge of the turkey anyways
so I can handle that too.
If I help.
D.J., you're right.
Guys, we can do this.
I am gonna make that stuffing.
Alright. And you
know what, fellas?
It just so happens I can do
amazing things with a yam.
And in many parts of the world
I am known as Mr. Vegetable.
- Uh-huh.
Give me my kid.
Oh, I'm feeling the miracle.
The miracle..
[trumpet imitation]
...of Thanksgiving.
Can you feel it?
(All)
We feel it!
Yes.
Are you ready?
(All)
We're ready!
Now let's cook.
[funk music]
♪ I never met a girl who makes
me feel the way that you do ♪
♪ You're alright ♪
♪ Whenever I'm asked
who makes my dreams real ♪
♪ I say that you do ♪
♪ You're outta sight ♪
♪ So fee fi fo fum ♪
♪ Look out baby
'cause here I come ♪
♪ I'm makin' you
a love that's true ♪
♪ So get ready ♪
♪ Get ready ♪
♪ I'm gonna try
to make you love me too ♪
♪ So get ready ♪
♪ 'Cause here I come ♪
♪ Get ready
'cause here I come ♪
♪ Get ready
'cause here I come ♪
Alright, girls. Let's go.
Here we go.
♪ Ba dum ba dum bump ♪
♪ Yeah ♪♪
We should have been
the new monkees.
Ladies and gentlemen,
the miracle..
[trumpet fanfare]
...of Thanksgiving.
The little miracle that
who made it all possible, D.J.!
- Alright, Deej.
- Thank you.
I couldn't have done it
without you guys.
Okay, guys,
go carve the turkey.
Ladies, please be seated
at our Thanksgiving table.
Michelle, what
are they gonna carve?
Turkey.
Turkey, turkey,
turkey, turkey.
This is so much better
than a restaurant.
Yeah. I hate
those booster seats.
They squeeze my tush.
Jess, we got a problem here.
Let me try.
[tapping]
It's frozen.
I had no idea you two
were so good in the kitchen.
'The turkey, the pie.'
You should open up
a restaurant and just
support me the rest of my life.
[whispering]
Frozen. It's frozen.
I'm so glad
this worked out so perfect.
Now I wasn't sure
if I could pull it off
but it turned out just the way
mom cooked it last year.
Do you think she
would have been proud of me?
Oh, I'm sure she would
have been, honey.
[instrumental music]
Excuse me a second.
I'll be right back.
You two stay right here.
Is there something
wrong with my turkey?
- Uh...no. No.
- There's, uh..
No turkey problem here at all.
- This is a very happy bird.
- Yeah.
He's happier than heck to be
dead right here in our kitchen.
In fact, I'm just gonna shove
that sucker back in the oven
for just a couple
more minutes.
Are you sure there's nothing
wrong with my turkey?
Oh, of course, honey.
You know what what a nut I am
about that extra crispy skin.
Well, dad,
don't overcook it.
You don't want it to get dry.
There's no danger
of that happening, D.J.
[doorbell rings]
Oh, my gosh!
Someone's at the door.
'Who's gonna get it?'
I don't know.
- Let's all go get it.
Come on, girls,
let's go see who came
to visit us on Thanksgiving day.
Coming.
Yes, yes, yes.
- Hi.
Must be your friends, Jesse.
No, not yet. Come in.
Hi. I'm Paula and this is
my sister, Alexandra.
Hi, I'm Danny Tanner
and these are my kids
Michelle and D.J. and Stephanie.
And that's Jesse and Joey.
- Hi.
- Hi. Who are you?
Uh, isn't this 1882, Girard?
Girard way, avenue,
street, place, or lane?
I'm not sure. Uncle Henry
just moved to town.
Could we use your phone?
We're already late, and this
hot turkey's getting cold.
Hot turkey. Sure. Come on in.
There's the phone
right over there.
Great.
Uh...girls, take Michelle
and go upstairs
and wash your hands.
Why? They're clean.
'Yeah, but they're not
Thanksgiving clean.'
Go, go, go. Go.
Men, this is the miracle
of thanksgiving.
That turkey was meant for us.
Oh, I've got a feeling
that may come
as a surprise
to the young ladies.
There's only one person
who can convince
these women to stay for dinner.
I don't know, fellas.
It's gonna be a little rough.
I mean, it would be easier
if it was like, say
one girl with a chicken
and on Groundhog's day.
Jesse, just think
of little D.J.'s face
when she goes into
the kitchen and sees
a turkey ice sculpture
in the oven.
Alright, okay.
I'll give it a shot.
But I'm gonna need a few things.
You. You dim the lights.
Joey, go get some drinks.
I'll get us some traditional
pumpkin margaritas.
- Alright. I'll surprise you.
- Get out of here.
Thank you. I'm really sorry
if we interrupted your dinner.
Oh, dinner?
What a coincidence!
I was just gonna talk
about dinner.
See, I figured, why spend dinner
over at Uncle Hank's house which
by the way, you can't even find.
When fate has kind of
dropped you and your bird
if you will,
here in our laps?
Because our husbands
wouldn't like it.
Oh.
Ball's in your court.
Uh..
I'll give you $100
for that turkey.
Excuse me?
125.
You want to buy our turkey?
You bet. 140.
- This is crazy.
- 150.
Let's talk.
[whistling]
Uh-oh.
Oh.
Oh, no.
[babbling incoherently]
(Jesse)
'Joey!'
[muffled]
Just a minute.
[grunting]
[mumbling]
[screaming]
[imitating siren]
Gobble, gobble, gobble.
What planet have we landed on?
I'm not sure but I think
I hear Uncle Henry calling.
- Good luck.
- Wait.
175. You can keep the stuffing.
200.
[screaming]
What is it, Lassie?
What is it, girl?
Did grandpa fall
in the river again?
What?
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
- 'Oh, my God.'
- What?
- We can't even see.
- Alright. Be careful.
The thing's on fire.
Oh, my gosh.
I love that crispy skin.
What happened?
It's all my fault, honey.
I just...your turkey
was a little frozen
so I shoved it in the oven
and I-I'm an idiot
I cranked it up all the way.
My turkey was frozen?
D.J., it's all my fault.
It was frozen.
I didn't defrost it enough.
Don't feel bad.
At least we still
can have the pie--
Pie.
Tell me that didn't happen.
That didn't happen.
Yes, it did.
I ruined mom's
picture-perfect pumpkin pie.
And I ruined the turkey.
- I'm gonna go talk to D.J.
- Alright.
[muffled]
And I'll go talk to Stephanie.
Whoa, whoa, wait.
I'll talk to Stephanie.
- Here, you take Michelle.
- Okay.
Oh, by the way, you got
a bottle stuck on your tongue.
[muffled]
Another miracle..
[imitating trumpet fanfare]
...of Thanksgiving!
Turkey!
Dad, you don't have to tell me.
I know I ruined
Thanksgiving for everyone.
You didn't ruin anything.
I let mom down.
Why?
Because of the turkey?
D.J., mom knew Thanksgiving
wasn't about turkeys.
It's about family
and about being thankful
for what we have.
I'm thankful I've got you.
You're the one who pulled us
all together tonight.
You're just trying
to make me feel better.
- Is it working?
- No.
You think you feel bad.
I feel worse.
- You couldn't.
- Oh, yeah?
Wait till I tell you
what's been going on.
I felt so bad
about your frozen turkey
that I offered those ladies
$200 for theirs.
Dad, that's crazy.
You should've just
told me the truth
and given me the $200.
And that would've
made me feel better.
Thanks for making
me feel better.
You're welcome.
Sometimes you remind me
so much of your mom.
You always have a smile
for me when I need one.
Yeah, well, like mom said
smiles are free,
so give them away.
(Steph)
'Uncle Jesse,
are you still here?'
No, I left.
You can come out
of the closet now.
'Nice try.'
Alright, that's it. I'm coming
in there with you. Look out.
Whoa, ah. Ow.
[grunts]
Hi.
I broke the pie.
Oh, that's alright. People
break things all the time.
It's okay, no big deal.
Everybody makes mistakes.
Not pie mistakes.
Even pie mistakes.
You know what?
I'm gonna show you a mistake
I made when I was your age.
Hop on my back. Come on, I'll
give you a piggyback ride.
Hop on. There we go.
It's kind of fun
hanging out in the closet.
You don't get out much, do you?
Alright, come here.
Now you settle down here
and be prepared
to be amazed at my stupidity.
Here, come on,
sit on my lap.
- Okay.
- Alright.
Take a look at that.
Who's that goofy-looking guy
with silly hair and big ears?
I don't have big ears.
They're fine now that
your head's bigger.
Why is your hair so lopsided?
Well, that's the thing, see?
When I was five
and your mom was ten
I let her cut my hair
because she said
she was in beauty school.
- And you believed her?
- Well, I said I was five.
I'm five and I
wouldn't fall for that.
Well, maybe you're just
a little smarter than I am.
Huh? You a little
uncle biter, huh?
- Look at this one.
- Oh, yeah.
Hey.
Who's that little girl with you?
That's your mommy.
She's pretty, isn't she?
Yeah.
What's she holding?
Well, in one hand
she's holding her scissors
and in the other hand, she's
holding about 95% of my hair.
[Steph laughing]
Oh, yeah, that's
for Halloween, huh?
Hey. How you guys doing?
- We're cool.
- We're fine.
Let's go have some black turkey
and some pie a la floor.
Okay but can we make a new pie?
Sure, Steph.
I promise not to drop it.
And I promise not to freeze it.
- Okay, let's go.
- Okay.
Come on, let's go eat.
I'm hungry.
You missed a great
thanksgiving, sis.
- You coming?
- Yeah. Yeah, let's go.
Wait, look at this.
I forgot how much the girls look
like Pam when she was their age.
Yeah, right.
Come on, let's go, man.
Wait a second. You wanna talk?
No. Why would I wanna talk?
Come on, let's go.
Jesse, it's okay
if you're hurting.
I'm not hurting,
I'm hungry. I wanna go eat.
Let's go, please.
You know, I hadn't
thought about this
but this must be
real hard on you.
You've spent more Thanksgivings
with Pam than any of us.
Hey, what does it take
to get through to you?
I don't wanna have
this conversation, okay?
So leave me alone.
Okay. Fine.
I'll be just moseying along.
But if you wanna talk..
...you know my home number.
When is it going
to stop hurting, man?
[instrumental music]
I-I keep thinking
the pain's gonna go away
but it doesn't.
When I see pictures of her,
I think of her..
I get this feeling.
This empt..
[sighs]
I know that feeling, Jesse.
And I don't think it ever
completely goes away.
Sometimes it's easier
but on days like this,
it's real hard.
But you don't have to
go through this alone.
I'm missing her, man.
It's, it's hard
for me to talk about it.
Talking about it,
that's what helps me.
Talking about the memories.
That's what keeps her
in your heart.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
You know, everybody
knows the story about
how I got my hair
all chopped up and everything
but I bet you don't know
how I retaliated.
Look at this.
Did you ever see your wife
with red, white and blue hair?
I think she looks cute.
How'd you do this?
Well, picture this, man.
It was the middle of the night.
Two things of finger-paints
and vanilla pudding.
[laughing]
I was a wicked little
five year old, wasn't I?
I'm glad you're here, Jesse.
Lord, as we gather
this Thanksgiving
we wanna thank you
for this bountiful
yet slightly overcooked,
reheated meal.
(all)
Amen!
But what we're
most thankful for
is being part of a family
who really loves each other.
(all)
Amen!
And god bless my mom and dad
who are in Orange County
with all my dad's
goofy relatives.
(all)
Amen!
And I'd just like to say
that I'm happy
to be a part of this family
and God bless my dad
and his third wife..
...Janice.
And to my mom who's on a
Thanksgiving gambling junket
to Atlantic City.
7 come 11, mom.
(all)
Amen!
Carve the turkey, dad.
My pleasure.
Okay, who wants
white meat?
- I do. I want some!
- Me.
Scratch the white meat.
We have dark meat
and really dark meat.
- Yeah.
[theme music]