1
00:01:12,605 --> 00:01:14,175
Welcome to the Taylor home.
We're about ready to start

2
00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:17,551
that second half of this fantastic game,
Green Bay Packers, Minnesota Vikings.

3
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:23,489
Before we go down to the field,
let's check out that snack situation.

4
00:01:23,550 --> 00:01:25,552
Mark, take it away.

5
00:01:25,819 --> 00:01:28,299
Pretzels, licorice, pork rinds.

6
00:01:28,354 --> 00:01:31,392
Yeah. That's three major
food groups right there -

7
00:01:31,458 --> 00:01:33,335
salt, sugar, lard.

8
00:01:33,793 --> 00:01:38,071
Um, all right.
Today, I got cold brewskis for me,

9
00:01:38,131 --> 00:01:40,611
ice-cold root brewskis
for my boys...

10
00:01:40,667 --> 00:01:42,738
- Dad? Here are the chips.
- You got it, buddy.

11
00:01:42,802 --> 00:01:45,248
- Go long.
- Nice pass, kid.

12
00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:47,251
All right.

13
00:01:49,609 --> 00:01:50,986
- Dad?
- What?

14
00:01:51,044 --> 00:01:53,752
You're turning all red.

15
00:02:01,488 --> 00:02:04,367
There's a warning label right there.

16
00:02:04,424 --> 00:02:09,464
You shouldn't open these in broad daylight
in Detroit. Could cause an explosion.

17
00:02:10,263 --> 00:02:13,369
Wow. Look at this warning label.

18
00:02:13,433 --> 00:02:16,937
Socks may strike husband unexpectedly.

19
00:02:17,003 --> 00:02:19,005
You could put an eye out like that.

20
00:02:19,072 --> 00:02:22,144
Boys, help me clean this mess up. Second
half's about ready to begin here. Hurry up.

21
00:02:22,208 --> 00:02:25,917
Now, listen. Don't get too involved in that,
Tim. We have to get ready to go soon.

22
00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:28,220
Go? Where are we going?

23
00:02:28,281 --> 00:02:30,727
Dinner. Tonight. Chez Pierre.

24
00:02:30,783 --> 00:02:34,526
- That can't be tonight.
- It most certainly is.

25
00:02:34,587 --> 00:02:35,930
Well, what about the big game?

26
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,060
What have you been watching
all this time?

27
00:02:38,124 --> 00:02:41,628
This is the little game
right before the big game.

28
00:02:41,694 --> 00:02:45,005
The big game's the Rams and the Lions.
Why didn't you remind me about dinner?

29
00:02:45,064 --> 00:02:48,307
Now, don't pull that. I asked you yesterday
if you had reconfirmed the reservations,

30
00:02:48,368 --> 00:02:50,808
and you said, "Uh-huh." And then I said,
"Were they for 7:00?"

31
00:02:50,837 --> 00:02:52,510
And you said, "Uh-huh." And then I said,
"Did you get the baby-sitter?"

32
00:02:52,572 --> 00:02:55,109
And you said, "Uh-huh." So I guess that
means you didn't get the baby-sitter, huh?

33
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,813
Uh-uh.

34
00:02:57,410 --> 00:02:59,219
Unbelievable.

35
00:02:59,279 --> 00:03:01,281
I completely forgot.

36
00:03:02,215 --> 00:03:05,196
We can't get a baby-sitter
at this late hour.

37
00:03:05,251 --> 00:03:09,097
This is a tremendous disappointment
to me.

38
00:03:09,155 --> 00:03:12,693
Yeah, I'll bet it is. This was
supposed to be our romantic night out.

39
00:03:12,759 --> 00:03:14,739
Hey. Romance? I got it.

40
00:03:14,794 --> 00:03:19,539
Why don't you and I go upstairs, turn the
lights down, sit in bed, bottle of wine?

41
00:03:19,599 --> 00:03:22,842
And we can watch the game up there!

42
00:03:22,902 --> 00:03:25,422
You're not getting out of this
with anything short of pneumonia.

43
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,954
Boy, it's funny you mentioned that.

44
00:03:32,011 --> 00:03:36,084
This morning I horked up
something nasty-looking.

45
00:03:36,683 --> 00:03:39,687
It shot right out of my lungs.

46
00:03:40,119 --> 00:03:43,623
Well, suck it back in.
We're going to dinner.

47
00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:46,870
Whoa!

48
00:03:46,926 --> 00:03:48,872
You don't whistle at guys, you doofus.

49
00:03:48,928 --> 00:03:51,704
You can when they look
as handsome as your daddy.

50
00:03:51,764 --> 00:03:54,005
Looking pretty good yourself, sweetheart.

51
00:03:59,305 --> 00:04:03,310
- Put a lid on it.
- Who'd you get to baby-sit for us? Linda?

52
00:04:03,376 --> 00:04:06,516
No. She finds you boys
a little... active.

53
00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:09,617
Good. She smells.

54
00:04:10,650 --> 00:04:13,460
- Did you get Alison?
- No, honey, she's busy.

55
00:04:13,519 --> 00:04:14,759
<i>But she sends her love.</i>

56
00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:19,763
Stop that. Sit, sit.

57
00:04:19,826 --> 00:04:21,533
Then who'd you get?

58
00:04:21,594 --> 00:04:24,370
Well, I found someone new.

59
00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:26,501
Go! Go! Go!

60
00:04:26,566 --> 00:04:28,910
- Tim...
- Go get the door!

61
00:04:29,669 --> 00:04:32,843
Please turn off the television.

62
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:36,049
- Mrs. Taylor?
- Yes.

63
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:40,182
Sir Larry Houdini,
world's second greatest escape artist,

64
00:04:40,246 --> 00:04:43,056
<i>and magician extraordinaire.</i>

65
00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:46,654
Hey, you're great. I saw you
at Chris Johnson's birthday party.

66
00:04:46,719 --> 00:04:49,825
- Oh, lovely little girl.
- Chris is a boy.

67
00:04:49,889 --> 00:04:52,267
Strange little boy.

68
00:04:55,862 --> 00:05:01,335
But tell me, where are the birthday
balloons, funny party hats, the pony ride?

69
00:05:01,401 --> 00:05:05,008
Well, um, actually,
no one here's having a birthday.

70
00:05:05,071 --> 00:05:07,415
Well, you told me on the phone
it was a birthday.

71
00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:12,422
I know. I lied. I'm so sorry. I was desperate.
My husband didn't get a baby-sitter,

72
00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:14,958
and I called everybody I knew,
and everybody was busy.

73
00:05:15,014 --> 00:05:16,823
Couldn't you just please stay?

74
00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:18,419
Never. Never!

75
00:05:19,385 --> 00:05:22,366
Sir Larry has performed
prestidigitation

76
00:05:22,422 --> 00:05:28,429
before prime ministers, heads of state,
two kings, and a cranky duke,

77
00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:34,501
and never once has he stooped
to baby-sitting to make ends meet.

78
00:05:35,501 --> 00:05:38,380
♪ Happy birthday to you

79
00:05:38,538 --> 00:05:41,144
♪ Happy birthday to you

80
00:05:41,207 --> 00:05:45,121
♪ Happy birthday... your names here

81
00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:47,488
♪ Happy birthday to you

82
00:05:47,547 --> 00:05:50,118
Thank you so much.
You don't know what this means to me.

83
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:52,527
Well, boys,
the performance is about to start,

84
00:05:52,585 --> 00:05:56,829
so would you please help Sir Larry in
with his magical trunk?

85
00:05:56,889 --> 00:05:59,392
- Uh, Jill, hold on. What's going on here?
- Oh, I'm sorry.

86
00:05:59,459 --> 00:06:04,533
Sir Larry, this is my husband, Tim.
Tim, this is Sir Larry, the baby-sitter.

87
00:06:04,597 --> 00:06:06,736
- How you doing?
- And magician extraordinaire.

88
00:06:06,799 --> 00:06:09,541
Yeah, I bet you are, Larry.
Uh, Jill?

89
00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:13,608
You got a magician
to baby-sit my boys?

90
00:06:14,440 --> 00:06:16,215
Perfect. Perfect.

91
00:06:16,275 --> 00:06:19,916
Sir Larry? The number where we are
at the restaurant is right here.

92
00:06:19,979 --> 00:06:21,458
Call us if you have any problems.

93
00:06:21,514 --> 00:06:23,653
- Whoa!
- What happened, Brad? What happened?

94
00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:26,629
The Lions just recovered a fumble.

95
00:06:26,686 --> 00:06:29,292
- Yes!
- OK. Goodbye, boys. Goodbye, Sir Larry.

96
00:06:29,355 --> 00:06:32,859
- Let's go, Tim.
- We should stay and watch a trick.

97
00:06:32,925 --> 00:06:35,735
It's not gonna work, Tim.
Let's go.

98
00:06:36,996 --> 00:06:39,875
Oh, my wallet.
Left it over there by the TV.

99
00:06:39,932 --> 00:06:42,811
- I've got credit cards.
- Do you?

100
00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:47,513
- Oh, my medicine's up by the TV upstairs.
- You don't take medicine.

101
00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:49,484
Oh!

102
00:06:49,542 --> 00:06:53,354
I should take some.
I'm feeling a horker coming on.

103
00:06:56,749 --> 00:06:59,127
This is so romantic.

104
00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:01,665
And you have to admit,
it's a beautiful place.

105
00:07:01,721 --> 00:07:04,361
A beautiful place
for a beautiful woman.

106
00:07:04,424 --> 00:07:06,904
Oh, thank you, sweetie.

107
00:07:06,959 --> 00:07:10,998
I really, really do appreciate this. I know
it was hard for you to leave that game.

108
00:07:11,063 --> 00:07:14,135
Game? What game?

109
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:16,807
Excuse me, sir.
Can you tell me where the ladies' room is?

110
00:07:16,869 --> 00:07:18,974
Down the hall, to the left.

111
00:07:19,038 --> 00:07:23,350
- I'll be right back.
- And I'll be right here, Jill. Right here.

112
00:07:24,343 --> 00:07:26,323
I'll be right here.

113
00:07:30,917 --> 00:07:31,987
Could you give me a hand
with this thing?

114
00:07:32,051 --> 00:07:33,724
Is that a radio?

115
00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:35,129
- Yeah.
- You got the game on?

116
00:07:35,188 --> 00:07:37,691
Got the game on.

117
00:07:37,757 --> 00:07:41,364
Take that. I wanna get that second quarter
before she gets back from the bathroom.

118
00:07:41,427 --> 00:07:46,103
- Oh, man. This is absolutely brilliant.
- Thanks, buddy.

119
00:07:48,668 --> 00:07:51,945
- So what's happening?
- Hold on a minute.

120
00:07:52,572 --> 00:07:54,609
- Here we go. Yes!
- What? What? What?

121
00:07:54,674 --> 00:07:57,120
I don't know. Some kind of interception.
They're inside the six. First and goal.

122
00:07:57,176 --> 00:07:58,780
All right! What's the score?

123
00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:01,724
Hold it, hold it, hold it.
Rodney's in motion.

124
00:08:01,781 --> 00:08:03,226
Rodney Peete's back. He's back.

125
00:08:03,282 --> 00:08:05,421
Jill's back. Hi, Jill.

126
00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:09,222
Did you miss me?

127
00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:15,004
Sure I missed you.

128
00:08:15,061 --> 00:08:17,541
- Are you OK?
- Oh, yeah.

129
00:08:19,365 --> 00:08:22,903
You ever twist your neck real fast,
get one of those cricks?

130
00:08:22,969 --> 00:08:27,076
- Well, I got that.
- Do you want me to rub it?

131
00:08:28,407 --> 00:08:31,149
- Your neck?
- My neck?

132
00:08:31,210 --> 00:08:34,248
No. If I put my hand like this...
Ooh, it feels much better now.

133
00:08:34,313 --> 00:08:36,122
OK.

134
00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:41,097
Ooh, look at this.
Endive souffle prepared with mushrooms.

135
00:08:41,153 --> 00:08:42,291
Yes!

136
00:08:47,727 --> 00:08:49,729
Mushroom, mm.

137
00:08:51,531 --> 00:08:54,410
Tim, you don't like mushrooms.

138
00:08:54,467 --> 00:08:59,439
At home, no. But here, you know...
They're in oils and stuff here. Yeah.

139
00:08:59,505 --> 00:09:01,075
Oh, look, look.
They have your favorite... trout almondine.

140
00:09:01,140 --> 00:09:02,744
All right!

141
00:09:04,343 --> 00:09:05,879
What happened?

142
00:09:05,945 --> 00:09:08,789
I'm having the trout!

143
00:09:13,853 --> 00:09:18,029
Tim, would you like to tell me what's going
on? Why you're, uh, sitting like that?

144
00:09:18,090 --> 00:09:20,070
- My neck.
- Well, perhaps I should look at it.

145
00:09:20,126 --> 00:09:23,903
No. No. From the naked eye,
it would look like any other neck.

146
00:09:23,963 --> 00:09:27,342
And cricks are generally inside necks.

147
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:29,141
- Gimme your hand.
- Hey, look at that.

148
00:09:29,201 --> 00:09:32,205
- Gimme your other hand.
- I don't want to.

149
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:38,249
Oh, Tim, give me the radio.

150
00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:41,918
I wasn't gonna listen
to the whole thing.

151
00:09:41,981 --> 00:09:44,393
- Would it help if I said I was sorry?
- It might.

152
00:09:44,450 --> 00:09:47,056
- I'm sorry.
- It didn't. Is this the volume?

153
00:09:53,125 --> 00:09:58,131
That's it, boys, nice and tight.
Sir Larry loves a challenge.

154
00:09:59,732 --> 00:10:02,713
- This is too cool.
- Oh, thank you, my lad.

155
00:10:02,768 --> 00:10:05,180
Do we get to stick swords
in the box?

156
00:10:05,237 --> 00:10:11,552
Sword in the box - fantastic illusion.
Sets the mind reeling and the pulse racing.

157
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,613
I don't do it.

158
00:10:15,915 --> 00:10:18,191
- Why not?
- Too easy.

159
00:10:19,251 --> 00:10:23,666
Now then, my lad,
will you kindly assist me into the trunk?

160
00:10:24,657 --> 00:10:30,164
Thank you.
Now, you will close the trunk and lock it.

161
00:10:30,229 --> 00:10:34,541
When I give the command,
you will set the timer at ten seconds.

162
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:37,080
And when the timer goes off...

163
00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:39,878
I shall appear at the front door.

164
00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:44,951
I don't know -
ten seconds isn't very long.

165
00:10:45,011 --> 00:10:49,790
To you. But to Sir Larry,
ten seconds is an eternity.

166
00:10:50,783 --> 00:10:54,788
Now, boys, prepare to be astonished.

167
00:10:55,921 --> 00:10:57,730
Close the lid!

168
00:11:04,196 --> 00:11:07,700
Is the top securely locked?

169
00:11:07,767 --> 00:11:13,774
- Yes, it is.
- Then set the timer and stand back.

170
00:11:36,729 --> 00:11:38,800
Sir Larry?

171
00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:40,866
Boys!

172
00:11:44,370 --> 00:11:47,579
Reset the timer.

173
00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:52,950
You know what you are, Tim.
You are a sports addict.

174
00:11:53,012 --> 00:11:58,325
I am not. I like sports, I have a very
healthy interest, but I am not an addict.

175
00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:06,294
- Is that the Lions game on in there?
- Yes. That's why service is a little slow.

176
00:12:06,358 --> 00:12:08,531
The staff have a television
in the kitchen.

177
00:12:08,594 --> 00:12:10,301
Hey.

178
00:12:12,531 --> 00:12:14,408
- Did you get a score?
- What's the score?

179
00:12:14,467 --> 00:12:18,506
I'm not sure. I know the Lions
intercepted a pass on the Rams' 20.

180
00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,778
- Yes!
- I bet it was Spielman.

181
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:23,650
Oh, Chris Spielman, awesome player.
Last week, see him against Minnesota?

182
00:12:23,709 --> 00:12:25,711
See him? Man, I was there.

183
00:12:27,680 --> 00:12:30,490
I can't take it. I can't take it.
I've got to see this game.

184
00:12:30,549 --> 00:12:33,086
Honey, I'm sorry. I'll be back.

185
00:12:38,724 --> 00:12:41,136
Whoo, that guy's got a problem.

186
00:12:46,866 --> 00:12:50,370
That guy is addicted to sports.

187
00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:54,942
He is out of control.

188
00:12:55,007 --> 00:12:58,352
- And you're not?
- No. No, no.

189
00:12:58,410 --> 00:13:00,651
We're here to talk about
whatever you wanna talk about.

190
00:13:00,713 --> 00:13:03,193
Well, that's good,
'cause I wanna talk about us.

191
00:13:03,249 --> 00:13:03,886
Oh.

192
00:13:03,949 --> 00:13:05,469
You know how
we're always talking about

193
00:13:05,518 --> 00:13:08,431
how we need to find more things
that we can do together for fun?

194
00:13:08,487 --> 00:13:09,693
- Yeah.
- We always talk about it,

195
00:13:09,755 --> 00:13:12,429
- but we never do anything about it?
- Let's do something about it.

196
00:13:12,491 --> 00:13:16,462
Next weekend -
monster truck rally and tractor pull.

197
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:21,411
Well, gee,
as much fun as that sounds,

198
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:25,711
I was really thinking
more along the lines of...

199
00:13:25,771 --> 00:13:27,682
ballroom dancing.

200
00:13:27,740 --> 00:13:29,742
Yeah.

201
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:33,885
- Boy, that was my second choice.
- No, no, really.

202
00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:36,654
I'm serious. I think it would really be fun
to take dancing lessons.

203
00:13:36,715 --> 00:13:39,423
Me? The King? Remember college?

204
00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:41,465
Yeah.

205
00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:45,263
Tim, disco didn't die.
You killed it.

206
00:13:45,324 --> 00:13:48,771
No, I'm talking about grown-up dancing.
Fred and Ginger.

207
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:52,605
I thought Fred married Wilma.

208
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:56,112
You know what I mean. You know, holding
each other close, swaying to the music,

209
00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:58,774
gliding across the floor.

210
00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:00,408
Gliding in public's not me.

211
00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:02,232
We can take private lessons,
just you and me.

212
00:14:03,943 --> 00:14:05,547
Unbelievable!

213
00:14:05,611 --> 00:14:07,557
- Uh-oh.
- Come here. You gotta see this.

214
00:14:07,613 --> 00:14:10,753
Sanders just broke one for 50 yards
around the right side.

215
00:14:10,816 --> 00:14:12,090
They tackled him on the one.

216
00:14:12,151 --> 00:14:14,188
We're gonna score!
It's a first down!

217
00:14:14,253 --> 00:14:16,392
Happy anniversary, baby.

218
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:32,447
Honey...

219
00:14:32,504 --> 00:14:35,007
would you like to go
and watch the game?

220
00:14:35,074 --> 00:14:39,352
No. No. We were talking about...

221
00:14:43,582 --> 00:14:45,789
- Ballroom dancing.
- Ballroom dancing. That's...

222
00:14:48,287 --> 00:14:51,200
So anyway,
the <i>lessons</i> are on Tuesday nights.

223
00:14:51,257 --> 00:14:53,760
- Uh-huh.
- And it doesn't really cost very much.

224
00:14:53,826 --> 00:14:55,100
<i>Oh.</i>

225
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:57,970
And, uh, I've been having an affair
with a space alien.

226
00:14:58,030 --> 00:14:59,475
Uh-huh.

227
00:14:59,531 --> 00:15:02,171
Yep, I'm, uh...
I'm having his baby.

228
00:15:02,234 --> 00:15:03,611
Uh-huh.

229
00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:08,309
Touchdown!

230
00:15:17,449 --> 00:15:20,453
Honey... go.

231
00:15:20,519 --> 00:15:23,159
- I'm fine. I don't have to see the game.
- No, trust me. It's OK.

232
00:15:23,222 --> 00:15:25,327
I really want you to go.

233
00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:28,260
Thank you.

234
00:15:37,636 --> 00:15:41,311
Hello? Hi, Mommy.
Guess what happened to Sir Larry.

235
00:15:41,373 --> 00:15:43,614
Mark!

236
00:15:43,676 --> 00:15:48,318
- Don't tell her, stupid.
- Why? We didn't do anything.

237
00:15:48,380 --> 00:15:52,726
The guy's locked in a box.
Who do you think she's gonna blame?

238
00:15:55,154 --> 00:15:58,294
Hi, Mom. Yeah, we're fine.

239
00:15:58,357 --> 00:16:01,270
Oh, yeah, he's excellent.
A lotta fun.

240
00:16:02,261 --> 00:16:04,263
Yeah. Good tricks, too.

241
00:16:06,365 --> 00:16:08,811
Um... now?

242
00:16:08,867 --> 00:16:11,507
Well, um,
he can't talk right now.

243
00:16:12,504 --> 00:16:15,178
Um... he just can't.

244
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:19,313
- She wants to talk to Mark.
- That's because she knows you'll squeal.

245
00:16:19,378 --> 00:16:22,052
I won't squeal, I promise.

246
00:16:24,883 --> 00:16:26,260
Hello, Mommy.

247
00:16:26,318 --> 00:16:29,925
Brad and Randy
locked Sir Larry in the trunk.

248
00:16:35,294 --> 00:16:37,638
- Boys!
- It's OK, Sir Larry.

249
00:16:37,696 --> 00:16:41,269
If we get the trunk high enough
and drop it, it'll break open.

250
00:16:41,333 --> 00:16:43,870
Please, let's not be hasty, boys.

251
00:16:45,037 --> 00:16:48,575
- Mom and Dad are home.
- We're dead. Hide!

252
00:16:49,541 --> 00:16:52,545
<i>- Boys'?
- Randy'? Mark'? Brad'?</i>

253
00:16:53,312 --> 00:16:55,314
Out here!

254
00:16:58,884 --> 00:17:01,387
Mark, where is Mr. Houdini?

255
00:17:02,488 --> 00:17:03,489
- Oh.
- In there.

256
00:17:03,555 --> 00:17:06,627
- Are you all right, Mr. Houdini?
- I'm fine.

257
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:10,162
The x-rays may reveal otherwise,
however.

258
00:17:10,963 --> 00:17:13,842
- Mark, where are your brothers?
- I don't know, Dad.

259
00:17:13,899 --> 00:17:15,936
In <i>the bushes.</i>

260
00:17:16,568 --> 00:17:18,309
Here, honey. Come here.

261
00:17:18,370 --> 00:17:22,045
Brad, Randy, come on out.
Come on. Come on, right now.

262
00:17:22,107 --> 00:17:23,780
I don't know
what gets into you guys sometimes.

263
00:17:23,842 --> 00:17:25,617
What'd you stuff that old man
in that trunk for?

264
00:17:25,677 --> 00:17:26,712
He told us to.

265
00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:28,315
Now, why would he want
to be put in a trunk?

266
00:17:28,380 --> 00:17:29,381
But he did tell us to.

267
00:17:29,448 --> 00:17:31,587
- Yeah, he did. It's the truth.
- He's not...

268
00:17:31,650 --> 00:17:35,029
The boys are speaking the truth.
They are completely innocent.

269
00:17:35,087 --> 00:17:37,590
We'll talk about this in the morning.
It's bedtime now.

270
00:17:37,656 --> 00:17:41,695
- Come on, I wanna see if he gets out.
- No, no, no. I'll be up later. Go on.

271
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:44,639
Honey, we're in some kinda trouble.

272
00:17:44,696 --> 00:17:50,271
These are reinforced
polycarbonate American butt hinges.

273
00:17:51,603 --> 00:17:54,880
Sir Larry, is there anything that
we can do? Someone we can call?

274
00:17:54,940 --> 00:17:58,649
Yes. You can call my son,
Cyril the Magnificent.

275
00:17:58,710 --> 00:18:03,716
He has an extra set of keys,
and he's at 555-7653.

276
00:18:03,782 --> 00:18:06,262
All right. I'll call right away.

277
00:18:06,318 --> 00:18:10,528
Hang in there, Sir Larry.
And just take real short little breaths.

278
00:18:10,589 --> 00:18:13,297
Wilson?

279
00:18:13,759 --> 00:18:15,670
- Howdy, neighbor.
- What are you doing over there?

280
00:18:15,727 --> 00:18:17,934
Oh, just mending
the bellows on my accordion.

281
00:18:17,996 --> 00:18:20,340
- Cool.
- What's in the trunk?

282
00:18:20,399 --> 00:18:23,380
- A famous magician.
- Oh. Is he coming out of the box?

283
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:25,711
As soon as his son comes over
and unlocks it.

284
00:18:25,771 --> 00:18:28,581
Not much of a trick, Tim.

285
00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:31,917
- You got a minute?
- Sure, good buddy. You got a problem?

286
00:18:31,977 --> 00:18:34,287
Well, it's Jill.

287
00:18:34,346 --> 00:18:37,486
I love her.
She's the most important thing in my life.

288
00:18:37,549 --> 00:18:40,120
What did you do this time, Tim?

289
00:18:40,652 --> 00:18:44,794
We went out tonight to have a night just by
ourselves - real romantic, that kinda stuff -

290
00:18:44,857 --> 00:18:47,428
and I spoiled it because
of a football game.

291
00:18:47,493 --> 00:18:49,302
We won.

292
00:18:49,361 --> 00:18:51,238
Mm-hm, mm-hm, mm-hm.

293
00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:54,903
I don't know what it is about
football and me. I'm obsessed, I think.

294
00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:57,607
Well, why do you think that is, Tim?

295
00:18:57,669 --> 00:19:00,172
I think it's 'cause I love it, Wilson.

296
00:19:00,239 --> 00:19:03,448
I love the surprise
and the strategy and the strength.

297
00:19:03,509 --> 00:19:06,456
The big guys, the logos,
the colorful helmets.

298
00:19:06,512 --> 00:19:08,583
The shine and the pads
and the mouth guards.

299
00:19:08,647 --> 00:19:14,654
The cleats and the hit and the impact.
The swearing, the sweat...

300
00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:19,196
Sets me free, Wilson.

301
00:19:19,258 --> 00:19:24,037
Well, what you're describing, Tim,
is what Aristotle would call a "catharsis."

302
00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:27,168
Catharsis, oh.
How do you spell that? C...

303
00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:30,509
Well, let's just say
an emotional release, Tim.

304
00:19:30,569 --> 00:19:34,847
Bingo. That's... that's what I feel,
and I don't think she understands that.

305
00:19:34,907 --> 00:19:36,750
She doesn't have to, Tim.

306
00:19:36,808 --> 00:19:39,118
I'm sure there are things about her
that you don't understand.

307
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:43,285
Well, you got that right. You know, that
woman has never had a haircut she liked.

308
00:19:43,348 --> 00:19:45,385
Well, there you go.

309
00:19:45,450 --> 00:19:50,832
And I go into her closet, I see 19 pairs
of black shoes. What's that all about?

310
00:19:50,889 --> 00:19:55,269
Well, Tim, different outfits
require different shoes.

311
00:19:55,327 --> 00:19:58,467
You got your pumps, your flats,
your espadrilles, your open-toes,

312
00:19:58,530 --> 00:20:01,477
your T-straps, your patent leather...
I could go on and on.

313
00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:02,876
I get the feeling you could.

314
00:20:02,935 --> 00:20:07,042
The point is, you and Jill don't have to
understand each other completely.

315
00:20:07,105 --> 00:20:12,987
What is important is to share and enjoy
the things you both do understand.

316
00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:16,026
That's exactly
what she was talking about, too.

317
00:20:16,081 --> 00:20:19,551
Sharing - she wanted to share.
But ballroom dancing?

318
00:20:19,618 --> 00:20:21,461
Well, why don't you give it a try, Tim?

319
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:27,801
As the ancient Celtic saying goes: Never
give a sword to a man who can't dance.

320
00:20:27,859 --> 00:20:29,998
Huh?

321
00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:32,975
- Sir Larry?
- Still in here.

322
00:20:33,031 --> 00:20:35,807
Yes, um, Cyril is on his way over
with the keys.

323
00:20:35,867 --> 00:20:38,006
Oh, thank you, kind madam.

324
00:20:44,943 --> 00:20:47,787
- Hi.
- Hi.

325
00:20:47,846 --> 00:20:51,419
About tonight, Jill.
I know I was stupid.

326
00:20:51,483 --> 00:20:55,829
I know I spoiled things.
I wanna apologize.

327
00:20:55,887 --> 00:20:59,664
And I won't watch
all-day football anymore.

328
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:04,263
What about Thanksgiving
and New Year's?

329
00:21:04,329 --> 00:21:05,774
Uh...

330
00:21:05,831 --> 00:21:07,674
Half-day.

331
00:21:08,734 --> 00:21:11,510
Or I'll cut out the pre-game show,
or something.

332
00:21:11,570 --> 00:21:15,677
I'll just try not to be
so stupid about it.

333
00:21:16,908 --> 00:21:19,912
- You'd do that for me?
- In a second.

334
00:21:21,813 --> 00:21:25,818
Well, we can always try
and do it again.

335
00:21:25,884 --> 00:21:28,797
Go out some evening,
have some romance.

336
00:21:28,854 --> 00:21:31,664
Well... we're here.

337
00:21:32,491 --> 00:21:34,164
We're alone.

338
00:21:34,226 --> 00:21:36,968
Moon's full. That's pretty romantic.
What more do you need?

339
00:21:49,975 --> 00:21:51,921
- Hey!
- No.

340
00:21:51,977 --> 00:21:55,686
♪ I'll be loving you

341
00:21:55,747 --> 00:21:59,058
♪ Always

342
00:21:59,117 --> 00:22:02,724
♪ With a love that's true

343
00:22:02,788 --> 00:22:06,031
♪ Always

344
00:22:06,091 --> 00:22:09,038
♪ When the things you planned

345
00:22:09,094 --> 00:22:12,667
♪ Need a helping hand

346
00:22:12,731 --> 00:22:16,338
♪ I will understand

347
00:22:16,401 --> 00:22:20,178
♪ Always, always

348
00:22:20,238 --> 00:22:23,344
♪ Fate may not be fair

349
00:22:23,408 --> 00:22:25,752
♪ Always

350
00:22:28,380 --> 00:22:32,419
Once you've cut the opening, you're
ready to lay the sink in there. Right? AI?

351
00:22:32,484 --> 00:22:34,327
Uh, that's right, Tim.

352
00:22:34,386 --> 00:22:38,266
You know, home improvement's
not just about renovating the kitchen.

353
00:22:38,323 --> 00:22:40,929
There's a lot of other ways
to improve your home.

354
00:22:40,992 --> 00:22:44,769
Always be aware
of your partner's needs.

355
00:22:44,830 --> 00:22:48,903
Take time out to share some special time
with your spouse.

356
00:22:48,967 --> 00:22:51,641
- Right, Al?
- I'm not married, Tim.

357
00:22:53,105 --> 00:22:56,245
If you change those shirts
and get a haircut, or something.

358
00:22:56,308 --> 00:23:00,085
- I got a haircut.
- Get a better one, AI.

359
00:23:00,145 --> 00:23:02,284
- OK.
- All right. We drop it on "three," yeah?

360
00:23:02,347 --> 00:23:03,690
- On "three."
- One.

361
00:23:03,749 --> 00:23:05,160
Two.

362
00:23:07,386 --> 00:23:09,662
Al?