1 00:00:00,754 --> 00:00:02,321 All right. 2 00:00:02,322 --> 00:00:05,324 I'm gonna show you how to do a reversal from the down position. 3 00:00:05,325 --> 00:00:07,893 I'm gonna pin you in about three seconds. 4 00:00:07,894 --> 00:00:11,998 That's real fair, dad. You weigh like a ton more than me. 5 00:00:11,999 --> 00:00:16,068 A ton? Ok, if that's not fair, why don't I just take on all three of you? 6 00:00:16,069 --> 00:00:17,369 All right! 7 00:00:19,372 --> 00:00:21,741 Come on, you bunch of little girls. 8 00:00:24,611 --> 00:00:27,446 1, 2, 3! You're pinned! You lose! 9 00:00:27,447 --> 00:00:29,448 Yeah, but... 10 00:00:29,449 --> 00:00:33,085 Not the second round! No! 11 00:00:33,086 --> 00:00:37,156 Dad, it smells under here! Seriously! 12 00:00:37,157 --> 00:00:39,692 It's the tim taylor half-smelly-nelson! 13 00:00:41,227 --> 00:00:44,263 Yeah, dad. Your pits are the pits! 14 00:00:44,264 --> 00:00:48,333 Hi, guys. I see he's got you in that half-smelly-nelson. 15 00:00:49,670 --> 00:00:52,071 How'd you know? 16 00:00:52,072 --> 00:00:54,907 He perfected it on me. 17 00:00:54,908 --> 00:00:57,176 Boys, aren't you supposed to be doing homework? 18 00:00:57,177 --> 00:00:59,812 I was until dad called us down to wrestle. 19 00:00:59,813 --> 00:01:01,814 Tim... 20 00:01:01,815 --> 00:01:04,750 You won't wrestle with me anymore, iguana woman. Come on. 21 00:01:04,751 --> 00:01:07,053 Hey, just put the groceries away, ape man. 22 00:01:07,054 --> 00:01:08,688 (grunts) 23 00:01:12,325 --> 00:01:14,560 Bite-size pretzels... 24 00:01:14,561 --> 00:01:18,297 Bite-size quiche. Darling. 25 00:01:18,298 --> 00:01:21,300 Bite-size pizza. Who's coming over, the bite-size family? 26 00:01:21,301 --> 00:01:25,971 I told you, I'm giving a baby shower for linda from work. 27 00:01:25,972 --> 00:01:28,040 Linda. Her husband's the crook? 28 00:01:28,041 --> 00:01:30,976 He's not a crook. He's a cook. 29 00:01:30,977 --> 00:01:33,179 We went to his restaurant. 30 00:01:33,180 --> 00:01:36,015 That's right. I paid the bill. He's a crook. 31 00:01:36,016 --> 00:01:38,084 Anyway, it's at 2:00 on Saturday, 32 00:01:38,085 --> 00:01:40,920 And a lot of people from work are gonna be there. 33 00:01:40,921 --> 00:01:43,622 You mean a lot of people people or a lot of women people? 34 00:01:43,623 --> 00:01:45,791 Women people. 35 00:01:45,792 --> 00:01:48,527 They're just like men people, only they have longer hair, and they're smarter. 36 00:01:50,496 --> 00:01:52,497 Bunch of women at a baby shower, 37 00:01:52,498 --> 00:01:57,737 Yakking about stretch marks, bloating, labor pains... 38 00:01:57,738 --> 00:02:02,307 I wanna discuss labor pains, I'll talk to a union man. 39 00:02:02,308 --> 00:02:04,443 Oh, come on. It'll be fun. 40 00:02:04,444 --> 00:02:07,346 Why don't you pop your head in and say hi for a second? 41 00:02:07,347 --> 00:02:10,082 I really want you to meet my women friends from work. 42 00:02:10,083 --> 00:02:12,151 Can't this Saturday. Why not? 43 00:02:12,152 --> 00:02:15,354 I'm busy on Saturday. We're doing that tool time till 2:00. 44 00:02:15,355 --> 00:02:17,790 And I told the boys I'd rush back here 45 00:02:17,791 --> 00:02:19,792 And take them to the demolition derby at four. 46 00:02:19,793 --> 00:02:21,961 Well, there's two hours in between there. 47 00:02:21,962 --> 00:02:23,362 Well, then I go upstairs. 48 00:02:23,363 --> 00:02:25,597 To do what? 49 00:02:25,598 --> 00:02:27,332 Upstairs stuff. 50 00:03:37,938 --> 00:03:40,505 What do you think? Could we put the kids in the middle? 51 00:03:43,076 --> 00:03:45,444 Does everybody know what time it is? 52 00:03:45,445 --> 00:03:47,379 (all) tool time! 53 00:03:47,380 --> 00:03:49,414 That's right. Binford tools is proud to present 54 00:03:49,415 --> 00:03:51,350 Tim "the tool man" taylor. 55 00:03:54,921 --> 00:03:57,223 Thank you, everybody, and welcome to tool time. 56 00:03:57,224 --> 00:03:59,624 I'm tim "the tool man" taylor. 57 00:03:59,625 --> 00:04:03,195 Thank you, heidi. Poor little al's out sick today. 58 00:04:03,196 --> 00:04:05,564 But don't have a flannel meltdown. 59 00:04:05,565 --> 00:04:09,335 He's gonna be helping us out by phone. Heidi, my al phone, please. 60 00:04:12,538 --> 00:04:14,940 Here you go, tim. Thank you, heidi. 61 00:04:14,941 --> 00:04:18,610 He's looking pretty sprightly, isn't he? 62 00:04:18,611 --> 00:04:21,780 Al, you there? Ahchoo! 63 00:04:21,781 --> 00:04:25,217 Use a tissue, fella. Come on! 64 00:04:25,218 --> 00:04:28,220 I would like the audience to know that I used a hanky. 65 00:04:31,157 --> 00:04:33,859 This is the first time you've been out sick, isn't it? 66 00:04:33,860 --> 00:04:35,361 Which is amazing, 67 00:04:35,362 --> 00:04:38,964 Considering all the injuries you've inflicted on me. 68 00:04:38,965 --> 00:04:40,900 Put your hand down, tim. 69 00:04:42,702 --> 00:04:45,437 Anyway, today we continue our week-long salute... 70 00:04:45,438 --> 00:04:48,040 (drain gurgling) 71 00:04:48,041 --> 00:04:50,642 ...To plumbing. 72 00:04:50,643 --> 00:04:53,312 And joining us today is master plumber felix myman. 73 00:04:53,313 --> 00:04:55,680 Let's give him a big tool time welcome. 74 00:05:00,020 --> 00:05:02,754 Good to have you aboard, felix. Nice to be here, tim. 75 00:05:02,755 --> 00:05:05,157 Felix and I go way back, right? 76 00:05:05,158 --> 00:05:09,828 That's right. I've been to your house for all of your plumbing disasters. 77 00:05:09,829 --> 00:05:13,232 The water heater, the dishwasher, jill's bathtub... 78 00:05:13,233 --> 00:05:14,833 I think we get the point. 79 00:05:14,834 --> 00:05:18,404 Anyway, we'll try to get... (al snorts and snickers) 80 00:05:24,945 --> 00:05:26,912 Being a master plumber, 81 00:05:26,913 --> 00:05:29,648 Felix is experienced with all sorts of bathroom problems - 82 00:05:29,649 --> 00:05:31,650 Sinks, showers... 83 00:05:31,651 --> 00:05:34,186 Speaking of showers, what do you think of baby showers? 84 00:05:34,187 --> 00:05:37,990 I'm against them. I think babies should take baths. 85 00:05:37,991 --> 00:05:40,092 No, it's a different sort of shower. 86 00:05:40,093 --> 00:05:42,161 It's like when women get together 87 00:05:42,162 --> 00:05:45,264 And yap about what to do when their water breaks. 88 00:05:45,265 --> 00:05:47,366 With any kind of water breakage, 89 00:05:47,367 --> 00:05:50,135 You wanna call a licensed plumber. 90 00:05:58,811 --> 00:06:02,081 The first segment of our plumbing show will start in the bathroom, 91 00:06:02,082 --> 00:06:04,450 Where all the action takes place, right on the throne. 92 00:06:04,451 --> 00:06:07,319 We're talking about a sweaty toilet. Heidi, my sweaty toilet, please. 93 00:06:10,656 --> 00:06:12,657 Here you are, tim. Thank you, heidi. 94 00:06:12,658 --> 00:06:13,725 You're welcome. 95 00:06:13,726 --> 00:06:16,328 Now, what is a sweaty toilet? 96 00:06:16,329 --> 00:06:19,465 Is it a toilet that's just overstressed from too many seat-ups? 97 00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:23,002 Oh! Oh! Oh! 98 00:06:23,003 --> 00:06:24,569 I don't think so, tim. 99 00:06:26,072 --> 00:06:28,073 Actually, tim, this problem occurs 100 00:06:28,074 --> 00:06:30,642 When the cold water in the tank cools the porcelain, 101 00:06:30,643 --> 00:06:33,545 And the warm, moist air condenses on the sides. 102 00:06:33,546 --> 00:06:35,680 Well said, felix. 103 00:06:35,681 --> 00:06:37,916 I'm glad there's somebody there who knows what he's talking about. 104 00:06:37,917 --> 00:06:40,452 I'm usually the one that has to step in and tell tim... 105 00:06:40,453 --> 00:06:42,454 Talk to you later, al. 106 00:06:42,455 --> 00:06:44,990 (dial tone) 107 00:06:44,991 --> 00:06:47,493 Ok, felix. What do we do about a sweaty toilet? 108 00:06:47,494 --> 00:06:50,929 You can install a tempering valve to mix the hot and cold water 109 00:06:50,930 --> 00:06:52,898 Before it enters the tank. 110 00:06:52,899 --> 00:06:55,100 But that's for professional installation only. 111 00:06:55,101 --> 00:06:57,436 For that, hire a licensed plumber like felix. 112 00:06:57,437 --> 00:06:59,104 For the do-it-yourselfer, 113 00:06:59,105 --> 00:07:03,242 You can just cement foam liners inside the tank. 114 00:07:03,243 --> 00:07:06,045 You'll wanna drain the water from the tank first 115 00:07:06,046 --> 00:07:08,647 And use an epoxy resin cement, 116 00:07:08,648 --> 00:07:11,083 Which will take a couple of hours to dry. 117 00:07:11,084 --> 00:07:14,319 Yeah, but, felix, when you gotta go, you got to go. 118 00:07:15,555 --> 00:07:17,256 That's why I recommend 119 00:07:17,257 --> 00:07:20,325 Binford's ultra-fast-drying urethane adhesive. 120 00:07:20,326 --> 00:07:22,394 I'm not sure you wanna use that kind of glue. 121 00:07:22,395 --> 00:07:26,765 I know what I'm doing here, ok? Just wait till it's tacky... 122 00:07:26,766 --> 00:07:30,335 Tim, I'd be careful. That's instant glue you're using. 123 00:07:30,336 --> 00:07:34,540 It's not like instant instant. 124 00:07:34,541 --> 00:07:36,442 (phone ringing) 125 00:07:40,646 --> 00:07:43,482 Would you get that for me? Oh, sure. 126 00:07:45,318 --> 00:07:47,719 Hello? Oh, hi, al. 127 00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:49,321 What does he want? 128 00:07:49,322 --> 00:07:53,024 He wants to know if you've got your hands glued to the toilet yet. 129 00:07:55,761 --> 00:07:57,162 Come on! 130 00:07:59,999 --> 00:08:05,504 (all) aw! 131 00:08:05,505 --> 00:08:09,007 I love these bootees. They're darling. 132 00:08:09,008 --> 00:08:12,611 Ok. Anybody ready for cake? (all) ohh! 133 00:08:12,612 --> 00:08:14,179 I'll help you. 134 00:08:14,180 --> 00:08:17,583 Ok. Hi, sweetie. When did you get home? I'm not home. 135 00:08:17,584 --> 00:08:19,784 Jill, is that your husband? 136 00:08:19,785 --> 00:08:23,622 Tell 'em I'm your latin lover miguel, and I don't speak english. 137 00:08:23,623 --> 00:08:27,959 Yes, it is my husband. Come and say hi. 138 00:08:27,960 --> 00:08:29,294 Ihola! 139 00:08:29,295 --> 00:08:33,632 Come and say hi and don't act stupid. 140 00:08:33,633 --> 00:08:35,601 This is my husband tim. 141 00:08:35,602 --> 00:08:37,569 (all) hi. Hi, everybody. Welcome to our house. 142 00:08:37,570 --> 00:08:40,205 Um... Shower power! 143 00:08:40,206 --> 00:08:44,209 So, I finally get to meet "the tool man." yeah. 144 00:08:44,210 --> 00:08:46,811 You know, I watch your show all the time. Really? 145 00:08:46,812 --> 00:08:48,079 Yeah. Who are you? 146 00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:51,750 Nora. I loved the one on squeaky floors. 147 00:08:51,751 --> 00:08:54,253 "a squeak, a creak or a... Ohhh!" 148 00:08:54,254 --> 00:08:56,255 A lot of people liked that show. 149 00:08:56,256 --> 00:08:58,657 Yeah. Two letters have already poured in. 150 00:09:01,528 --> 00:09:03,595 Jill, I hope you don't mind me saying this, 151 00:09:03,596 --> 00:09:06,097 But I think tim is even more handsome in person 152 00:09:06,098 --> 00:09:08,167 Than he is on television. 153 00:09:08,168 --> 00:09:11,436 Well... Excuse me. I don't mind. 154 00:09:11,437 --> 00:09:12,937 You are...? Eve. 155 00:09:12,938 --> 00:09:16,074 Can I get you a cold drink, some dip or a condominium? 156 00:09:18,044 --> 00:09:20,845 And - I'm just taking a shot - you must be the guest of honor. 157 00:09:20,846 --> 00:09:23,748 Hi. I'm linda. Can you join us, tim? 158 00:09:23,749 --> 00:09:27,653 Oh... I'm not a big baby-shower guy. I'm a big baby guy. 159 00:09:27,654 --> 00:09:30,589 Oh. I hope my husband turns out to be a big baby guy. 160 00:09:30,590 --> 00:09:32,757 He's really nervous right now. 161 00:09:32,758 --> 00:09:34,259 Here. I'll take these. Thank you. 162 00:09:34,260 --> 00:09:36,295 Guys are generally nervous about babies. 163 00:09:36,296 --> 00:09:38,930 You women do all the work, and then we have to sit back and think, 164 00:09:38,931 --> 00:09:41,933 "will I be a good father to him? Will he relate to me?" 165 00:09:41,934 --> 00:09:44,803 Or even worse, what if he turns out to be a she? 166 00:09:44,804 --> 00:09:47,539 Then I have to protect she from all the he's. 167 00:09:47,540 --> 00:09:51,843 You sound like you've given this a lot of thought. 168 00:09:51,844 --> 00:09:56,215 We had three boys. They were babies once, and they were really cool babies. 169 00:09:56,216 --> 00:09:58,417 I think men have a lot in common with babies. 170 00:09:58,418 --> 00:10:01,687 We both get real cranky if we don't get fed on time. 171 00:10:01,688 --> 00:10:03,822 We like to take naps in the afternoon. 172 00:10:03,823 --> 00:10:07,192 And I don't know a guy in the world that doesn't like a good game of peek-a-boo. 173 00:10:09,662 --> 00:10:13,332 (women) ohh! 174 00:10:13,333 --> 00:10:15,367 This is a lot of fun. I wish I could stay around. 175 00:10:15,368 --> 00:10:18,537 Have a nice shower and have fun here. Bye. 176 00:10:19,672 --> 00:10:21,273 What a doll. 177 00:10:21,274 --> 00:10:23,808 Jill, you are so lucky. 178 00:10:23,809 --> 00:10:27,045 That is exactly the kind of man I've been looking for. 179 00:10:27,046 --> 00:10:28,780 He is fabulous. 180 00:10:28,781 --> 00:10:31,617 He is fabulous. Who was that? 181 00:10:34,220 --> 00:10:36,588 This was a great shower, jill. Thank you so much. 182 00:10:36,589 --> 00:10:39,324 You're welcome. Here, I'll do that. 183 00:10:39,325 --> 00:10:43,094 I've put all your gifts in the trunk. Where'd you get that bib with the trough? 184 00:10:43,095 --> 00:10:45,096 It'd be perfect for ball games. 185 00:10:45,097 --> 00:10:48,667 "that last beer was a little too much for me." 186 00:10:48,668 --> 00:10:50,969 I'm gonna take the boys on an educational trip. 187 00:10:50,970 --> 00:10:52,404 Museum? Library? 188 00:10:52,405 --> 00:10:56,074 Actually, demolition derby. Vroom-bam! 189 00:10:56,075 --> 00:10:58,810 He is so funny. You must laugh all the time. 190 00:10:58,811 --> 00:11:00,679 All the time. 191 00:11:02,548 --> 00:11:04,583 Thanks again. You be well. 192 00:11:04,584 --> 00:11:06,217 Bye. Bye-bye. 193 00:11:06,218 --> 00:11:10,555 Here you go, here you go. 194 00:11:10,556 --> 00:11:13,992 Thanks, mom. Bye-bye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. 195 00:11:13,993 --> 00:11:15,994 Yes! See you later, honey. 196 00:11:15,995 --> 00:11:18,430 You! Wait. 197 00:11:18,431 --> 00:11:19,631 What? 198 00:11:19,632 --> 00:11:21,866 You were incredible at that shower. 199 00:11:21,867 --> 00:11:25,270 You were funny and charming and sexy. 200 00:11:25,271 --> 00:11:29,174 All the women wanted to be married to you. 201 00:11:29,175 --> 00:11:31,843 I wanted to be married to them, too. 202 00:11:33,713 --> 00:11:38,216 Maybe we could work out some kind of time-share arrangement. 203 00:11:38,217 --> 00:11:42,954 You know, sometimes I just forget what an amazing hunk of man you are. 204 00:11:42,955 --> 00:11:43,888 Ohh. 205 00:11:46,326 --> 00:11:51,095 Well, I'd love to stick around and give you a little reminder, but... The boys need me. 206 00:11:51,096 --> 00:11:52,297 I need you. 207 00:11:52,298 --> 00:11:55,033 (car horn honks) ah! 208 00:11:55,034 --> 00:11:57,836 Demolition derby... Sexy wife. 209 00:11:59,305 --> 00:12:02,240 Demolition derby... Ooh, sexy wife. 210 00:12:03,609 --> 00:12:06,044 Could you hold that thought till about 10:00 tonight? 211 00:12:06,045 --> 00:12:07,979 This thought here? 212 00:12:13,319 --> 00:12:15,920 That would... That would be the one. (car horn honks) 213 00:12:17,590 --> 00:12:18,923 Hurry back, mister. 214 00:12:20,827 --> 00:12:25,129 Every time I see two heaps slam into one another tonight, I'll be thinking about us. 215 00:12:36,409 --> 00:12:40,078 Honey, what a demolition derby. I wish you'd been there. 216 00:12:40,079 --> 00:12:43,782 We were so close to the action, you could taste the exhaust. 217 00:12:43,783 --> 00:12:45,851 I'm glad you're back. Where are the boys? 218 00:12:45,852 --> 00:12:48,787 They're in their rooms. Proud of those little guys. 219 00:12:48,788 --> 00:12:51,990 They each had one of those 52-ounce root beers. 220 00:12:51,991 --> 00:12:54,225 Randy let out a burp so loud, 221 00:12:54,226 --> 00:12:57,061 One of the drivers thought he blew a tire. 222 00:12:59,231 --> 00:13:01,533 I always knew that that boy was special. 223 00:13:01,534 --> 00:13:03,968 (whistles) are you looking good. 224 00:13:03,969 --> 00:13:06,471 Let me get out of these cruddy clothes. 225 00:13:06,472 --> 00:13:09,107 Don't take too long. I won't. 226 00:13:10,576 --> 00:13:12,977 What a great night with the boys, though. 227 00:13:12,978 --> 00:13:16,281 A lot of good food... Oh! 228 00:13:16,282 --> 00:13:17,616 Ah! 229 00:13:19,285 --> 00:13:23,555 Ohh! I got some double-cheese nachos sitting right here. 230 00:13:24,724 --> 00:13:26,491 (burps) ohh! 231 00:13:28,994 --> 00:13:30,161 Tim! 232 00:13:30,162 --> 00:13:32,063 Got a little gas ball moving, moving... 233 00:13:32,064 --> 00:13:33,164 (burps) 234 00:13:34,934 --> 00:13:35,967 Ah! 235 00:13:35,968 --> 00:13:38,837 This is real attractive. 236 00:13:40,272 --> 00:13:42,974 So... 237 00:13:42,975 --> 00:13:44,876 Where were we? 238 00:13:47,747 --> 00:13:50,715 It's kinda hard to remember. 239 00:13:51,884 --> 00:13:54,385 This'll refresh your memory. 240 00:13:54,386 --> 00:13:56,087 (stifles burp) 241 00:14:00,460 --> 00:14:01,960 Sorry. 242 00:14:06,198 --> 00:14:09,901 Sorry. I'm sorry. Mark was right. Ohh. 243 00:14:09,902 --> 00:14:12,804 You shouldn't have double onions on those chili dogs. 244 00:14:14,607 --> 00:14:16,240 Hello... 245 00:14:25,518 --> 00:14:27,719 Where are you going? 246 00:14:27,720 --> 00:14:29,621 I've had enough. 247 00:14:29,622 --> 00:14:31,322 I thought we were gonna, you know... 248 00:14:31,323 --> 00:14:34,292 Are you insane? 249 00:14:34,293 --> 00:14:36,595 You were drooling all over me when I left. 250 00:14:36,596 --> 00:14:39,063 Yeah, well, that was a different guy. 251 00:14:39,064 --> 00:14:44,703 What happened to the man who was debonair and attractive and oozing charm? 252 00:14:46,138 --> 00:14:49,875 That's me. I'm him. 253 00:14:49,876 --> 00:14:54,813 No, you're the guy that burps and oozes something, but it isn't charm. 254 00:14:54,814 --> 00:14:57,181 You were charming the pants off those women today. 255 00:14:57,182 --> 00:14:59,584 Why don't you do that with me anymore? 256 00:14:59,585 --> 00:15:01,820 I was just trying to make a good impression. 257 00:15:01,821 --> 00:15:04,455 It really ticks me off that just because we're married, 258 00:15:04,456 --> 00:15:08,159 Everybody else gets the best part of you, and I just get the rest. 259 00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:10,595 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 260 00:15:10,596 --> 00:15:13,097 Back the trolley up here a minute. 261 00:15:13,098 --> 00:15:15,433 It's not like I get the best o' jill. 262 00:15:15,434 --> 00:15:18,737 That morning breath could take the paint off my hot rod. 263 00:15:20,540 --> 00:15:22,574 And how about this little ratty robe? 264 00:15:22,575 --> 00:15:24,943 Like that says, "come and take me, big fella." 265 00:15:26,311 --> 00:15:29,848 The point is that tonight, I really tried. 266 00:15:29,849 --> 00:15:33,184 When was the last time that you put on something like this for me? 267 00:15:34,620 --> 00:15:37,321 I put that on, I'd be arrested, honey. 268 00:15:37,322 --> 00:15:39,257 Come on. 269 00:15:39,258 --> 00:15:41,960 All I wanted was one night of romance, 270 00:15:41,961 --> 00:15:44,462 And you turn it into a big argument. 271 00:15:44,463 --> 00:15:49,400 So let's not argue. I, for one, am still in the mood. 272 00:15:49,401 --> 00:15:52,203 I'm taking a wild shot that you're not. 273 00:15:55,041 --> 00:15:59,277 Ohh! Drat, drat, drat, drat, drat. 274 00:15:59,278 --> 00:16:01,512 Problem, wilson? 275 00:16:01,513 --> 00:16:06,051 Well, tim, I am attempting to balance an egg, 276 00:16:06,052 --> 00:16:08,286 But it's not easy. 277 00:16:08,287 --> 00:16:10,622 But if it falls, it's overeasy. (chuckles) 278 00:16:13,859 --> 00:16:15,860 You are quite the yolkster. 279 00:16:18,397 --> 00:16:22,567 Actually, tim, some people believe that an egg will stand on its end 280 00:16:22,568 --> 00:16:24,736 During the vernal equinox. 281 00:16:24,737 --> 00:16:26,805 The vernal what-nox? 282 00:16:26,806 --> 00:16:28,139 The vernal equinox, tim. 283 00:16:28,140 --> 00:16:30,374 It signifies the first day of spring, 284 00:16:30,375 --> 00:16:32,677 It's when the sun is directly over the equator 285 00:16:32,678 --> 00:16:35,814 And gravitational pull is at its strongest. 286 00:16:35,815 --> 00:16:38,750 That's probably what's affecting jill. 287 00:16:38,751 --> 00:16:40,752 What'd you do this time, tim? 288 00:16:40,753 --> 00:16:44,322 I didn't do anything. She's bent out of shape because I'm too charming. 289 00:16:44,323 --> 00:16:49,728 You are quite the dazzler. I don't see why that would upset jill, though. 290 00:16:49,729 --> 00:16:52,864 She thinks I'm only charming for other people and not her. 291 00:16:52,865 --> 00:16:55,366 Oh. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. 292 00:16:55,367 --> 00:16:59,604 I think she wants things to be like they were when we first met. 293 00:16:59,605 --> 00:17:01,539 But I like the way things are now. 294 00:17:01,540 --> 00:17:05,010 I like not always having to impress the other person or get dressed up. 295 00:17:05,011 --> 00:17:07,646 Mm-hmm. So you would tend to agree with j.B. Priestley, 296 00:17:07,647 --> 00:17:11,750 Who said that, "marriage is like an endless visit in your worst clothes." 297 00:17:11,751 --> 00:17:13,484 (chuckles) 298 00:17:13,485 --> 00:17:15,820 That guy really knew about marriage. 299 00:17:15,821 --> 00:17:18,990 And divorce, too. He was married three times. 300 00:17:18,991 --> 00:17:21,159 Oh, no! 301 00:17:21,160 --> 00:17:23,528 Three mother-in-laws. (clucks) 302 00:17:23,529 --> 00:17:25,496 (laughs) 303 00:17:25,497 --> 00:17:27,932 When jill and I first got married, 304 00:17:27,933 --> 00:17:30,869 In order win her, I really had to pour on the charm. 305 00:17:30,870 --> 00:17:33,604 Then she wanted to see through the charm and see if I really loved her. 306 00:17:33,605 --> 00:17:37,175 And now that she knows I really love her, she wants the charm back. 307 00:17:37,176 --> 00:17:41,412 Hmm. Well, tim, maybe after 15 years of marriage, 308 00:17:41,413 --> 00:17:46,384 Making an effort to be more charming has more meaning. 309 00:17:46,385 --> 00:17:48,419 Hmm. Yeah. 310 00:17:48,420 --> 00:17:51,990 It's too bad. I like being comfortable in my own house. 311 00:17:51,991 --> 00:17:55,560 If I've got a little gas, I don't want to have to run out to the backyard. 312 00:17:57,329 --> 00:17:59,564 I don't want that, either. 313 00:18:08,207 --> 00:18:10,441 Jill? Hi. 314 00:18:11,844 --> 00:18:14,412 Hi. I was laying under the hot rod, 315 00:18:14,413 --> 00:18:16,547 And I got to thinking about you. 316 00:18:16,548 --> 00:18:19,584 Really? Usually you're laying with me 317 00:18:19,585 --> 00:18:22,320 And get to thinking about the hot rod. 318 00:18:24,623 --> 00:18:26,657 I think you're right. 319 00:18:26,658 --> 00:18:30,061 I don't really work on charming you like I used to. 320 00:18:30,062 --> 00:18:31,830 Well, that's true. 321 00:18:31,831 --> 00:18:36,167 I don't think you wore coveralls to bed until the fifth anniversary. 322 00:18:36,168 --> 00:18:40,404 I just don't wanna be one of those priests that drops eggs on his three wives. 323 00:18:44,676 --> 00:18:45,944 What? 324 00:18:49,081 --> 00:18:53,317 Sometimes in a marriage, you can get too comfortable. 325 00:18:53,318 --> 00:18:56,187 Well, we're both getting lazy. 326 00:18:56,188 --> 00:18:59,791 I guess after 15 years and three kids, it's kinda natural. 327 00:18:59,792 --> 00:19:03,361 Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I don't wanna get so lazy that we stop trying. 328 00:19:03,362 --> 00:19:05,663 Me neither. 329 00:19:05,664 --> 00:19:08,099 Do you remember when I asked you to marry me? 330 00:19:08,100 --> 00:19:11,302 I was so nervous, my hands were as sweaty as toilets. 331 00:19:16,976 --> 00:19:19,210 Why were you nervous? 332 00:19:19,211 --> 00:19:22,180 I was afraid you'd say no and I'd have to spend the rest of my life without you. 333 00:19:22,181 --> 00:19:24,115 I knew I couldn't return that ring. 334 00:19:26,451 --> 00:19:28,787 You still make me laugh. 335 00:19:28,788 --> 00:19:32,456 That's good. It's the best 15 years I've ever had. 336 00:19:39,865 --> 00:19:43,268 Got a little gift for you. Stay right there. 337 00:19:43,269 --> 00:19:45,403 Oh... 338 00:19:47,773 --> 00:19:50,108 You still have some charm left. 339 00:19:50,109 --> 00:19:52,376 I still have some tricks up my sleeve. 340 00:20:04,824 --> 00:20:07,491 Whoa! 341 00:20:07,492 --> 00:20:09,894 Bond. James bond. 342 00:20:13,765 --> 00:20:17,235 (♪ "the way you look tonight") 343 00:20:21,506 --> 00:20:24,542 I wish that I had a beautiful gown on underneath my robe. 344 00:20:24,543 --> 00:20:27,445 What do you have on under there? Nothing. 345 00:20:27,446 --> 00:20:28,813 Ohh-ho. 346 00:20:31,116 --> 00:20:33,084 That's better than any gown. 347 00:20:58,344 --> 00:21:02,146 Are mom and dad up yet? No. And quit bugging us! 348 00:21:02,147 --> 00:21:04,749 It's late. When are they gonna get up? 349 00:21:04,750 --> 00:21:06,550 Don't you know anything? 350 00:21:06,551 --> 00:21:08,586 Whenever mom and dad have a fight, 351 00:21:08,587 --> 00:21:12,357 Dad apologizes, and then, the next morning, they sleep late. 352 00:21:14,059 --> 00:21:17,195 I don't think they're sleeping. 353 00:21:17,196 --> 00:21:21,032 You don't? Why not? 354 00:21:21,033 --> 00:21:24,668 Because I heard them jumping up and down on their bed. 355 00:21:26,372 --> 00:21:28,539 Oh... Well, you know, 356 00:21:28,540 --> 00:21:32,543 They're probably just having one of their, um... Somersault contests. 357 00:21:34,513 --> 00:21:37,448 Yeah. It's a lot like the olympics. 358 00:21:38,750 --> 00:21:41,719 Sounds like fun. Why don't they ask us to play? 359 00:21:44,489 --> 00:21:47,926 Trust me, mark. You don't wanna play. 360 00:21:51,297 --> 00:21:53,697 Oh. Hi, mom. Hi, dad. 361 00:21:53,698 --> 00:21:57,735 Hi, sweetie. What a great day. 362 00:21:57,736 --> 00:22:00,271 Yeah, what a great day. Yeah. 363 00:22:01,740 --> 00:22:04,042 Brad and randy told me what you were doing upstairs. 364 00:22:08,314 --> 00:22:10,248 They did? 365 00:22:10,249 --> 00:22:14,885 Yeah. Having one of those somersault contests. Who won? 366 00:22:15,955 --> 00:22:19,057 Your mom won. She always wins. 367 00:22:25,497 --> 00:22:28,199 You did win, didn't you? Twice. 368 00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:29,667 (grunts) 369 00:22:33,772 --> 00:22:36,441 Does everybody know what time it is? 370 00:22:39,445 --> 00:22:42,981 Ok, there's a little thing we do here. We yell "tool time." 371 00:22:44,549 --> 00:22:46,951 It sounds like you've given this a lot of thought. 372 00:22:46,952 --> 00:22:48,886 Well, we had three... Three babies... 373 00:22:48,887 --> 00:22:51,389 When the boys were babies, and I... You know... 374 00:22:53,792 --> 00:22:56,060 Men are actually a lot like babies.