1 00:00:01,568 --> 00:00:03,468 Does everybody know what time it is? 2 00:00:03,536 --> 00:00:05,026 Tool Time! 3 00:00:05,105 --> 00:00:09,405 That's right. Binford Tools is proud to present Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor! 4 00:00:09,476 --> 00:00:12,707 [cheering] 5 00:00:18,585 --> 00:00:20,746 Thank you, Heidi. 6 00:00:20,820 --> 00:00:22,685 Thank you very much. 7 00:00:22,756 --> 00:00:25,384 Welcome to Tool Time. l'm Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor 8 00:00:25,458 --> 00:00:27,619 and you all know my assistant, Al Borland. 9 00:00:27,727 --> 00:00:29,957 - [applause] - How are you doin'? 10 00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:33,158 Thanks for the ride. 11 00:00:33,233 --> 00:00:35,258 Maybe next time you'll kick in for gas. 12 00:00:35,335 --> 00:00:38,361 All right. Great to be back. First show this season. 13 00:00:38,438 --> 00:00:42,067 l've got some big news. Somebody on the show's pregnant. 14 00:00:42,142 --> 00:00:43,632 [chuckling] 15 00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:45,974 Al, when are you expecting? 16 00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:51,211 Actually, it's Heidi who's expecting a bundle of joy. 17 00:00:51,317 --> 00:00:53,046 That's right, our little Heidi. 18 00:00:53,119 --> 00:00:56,646 Just married, soon to be Tool Time mom, give her a round of applause. 19 00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:59,283 [applause] 20 00:01:01,528 --> 00:01:04,190 Good to be back with a big show. lt's a two-parter. 21 00:01:04,264 --> 00:01:06,164 We're doing our Tool Time salute... 22 00:01:06,232 --> 00:01:07,893 [motor revving] 23 00:01:08,701 --> 00:01:11,670 - ...to engines, big and small. - That's right. 24 00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:15,367 Today we're gonna show you a couple examples of some smaller engines. 25 00:01:15,442 --> 00:01:19,173 ln the next segment, the Navy's invited us aboard the USS Constellation, 26 00:01:19,245 --> 00:01:22,806 the aircraft carrier, to see some big motors. Oh, yeah. 27 00:01:22,882 --> 00:01:26,750 Actually, they invited me and Heidi. We had to beg them to let Tim come. 28 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:30,120 [hissing] 29 00:01:31,357 --> 00:01:33,825 Let's get back to small engines. Look at this. 30 00:01:33,893 --> 00:01:35,724 lt's a Conley 427. 31 00:01:35,795 --> 00:01:38,423 Smallest four-stroke production V-8 in the world. 32 00:01:38,498 --> 00:01:42,059 Beautifully detailed, four-bolt mains, and runs in a car like this. 33 00:01:42,168 --> 00:01:44,398 - Start her up, Al. - [starts engine] 34 00:01:46,139 --> 00:01:47,800 [revving engine] 35 00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:53,678 l bet there's people out there going, 36 00:01:53,746 --> 00:01:56,681 ''That's the smallest engine in the world''. 37 00:01:56,749 --> 00:01:58,216 [buzzer sounds] 38 00:01:58,284 --> 00:01:59,308 [both] Wrong. 39 00:01:59,385 --> 00:02:03,287 The smallest engine in the world is on the smallest automobile in the world, 40 00:02:03,356 --> 00:02:05,119 the Denso Micro-Car. 41 00:02:05,225 --> 00:02:07,557 Marv, you want to come in here a little closer? 42 00:02:07,627 --> 00:02:10,960 lt took 20 people four years to assemble this bad boy. 43 00:02:11,030 --> 00:02:15,160 [Al] lt's an actual working car the size of a grain of rice. 44 00:02:15,835 --> 00:02:17,393 [Tim] Look at her go. 45 00:02:18,571 --> 00:02:21,039 A little more speed it'll be the lead car 46 00:02:21,107 --> 00:02:24,406 in the Uncle Ben's 500 this year. 47 00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:26,308 - Let's take a closer look. - Tim... 48 00:02:26,379 --> 00:02:29,143 - They're not around. - They're very delicate. 49 00:02:29,249 --> 00:02:31,012 - Don't pick it up. - Hey! 50 00:02:34,254 --> 00:02:37,690 That is what l call a compact car. [whistles] 51 00:02:52,205 --> 00:02:53,502 [glass breaking] 52 00:02:57,310 --> 00:03:00,746 Hey. We'll be right back after these messages from Binford. 53 00:03:53,132 --> 00:03:55,293 - Hi, guys. - Hey, Mom. 54 00:03:55,368 --> 00:03:58,428 Well, l got you everything you'll need to start school. 55 00:03:58,504 --> 00:04:02,770 Backpacks, notebooks, paper, pens, highlighters. 56 00:04:02,842 --> 00:04:06,369 - Anything else you need? - Someone to go and pretend to be me. 57 00:04:08,214 --> 00:04:11,308 Randy, you must be looking forward to starting high school. 58 00:04:11,384 --> 00:04:15,753 Yeah, this sleeping in late and having fun all day is getting on my nerves. 59 00:04:16,222 --> 00:04:18,713 You should be like Brad. He can't wait to start. 60 00:04:18,791 --> 00:04:21,157 Yep, and right out there's the reason why. 61 00:04:23,062 --> 00:04:24,791 They have every class together. 62 00:04:24,864 --> 00:04:28,027 Brad's even thinking about joining the modern dance club. 63 00:04:37,510 --> 00:04:39,034 - Hi, sweetie. - Hi, Mom. 64 00:04:39,646 --> 00:04:43,810 So, you seem to be seeing an awful lot of Angela. 65 00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:46,881 Yeah. She's great, isn't she? 66 00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:50,218 Yeah. She's great. She really... She's... She's great. 67 00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:51,723 Yeah. 68 00:04:51,791 --> 00:04:54,021 But you know what l was thinking? 69 00:04:54,761 --> 00:04:58,720 A guy your age should be playing the field, dating different girls. 70 00:05:04,470 --> 00:05:06,836 Nope. l found the one, so what's the point? 71 00:05:08,608 --> 00:05:10,872 - Oh, hi, Mrs. Taylor. - Hi. 72 00:05:10,943 --> 00:05:14,470 - Brad, l think l left my bag. - Oh. Oh, here it is. 73 00:05:15,882 --> 00:05:18,442 - Here you go, Ang. - Thanks, sweetie. 74 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,124 l can't wait to go back to school. 75 00:05:31,964 --> 00:05:33,898 [Tim] lt's been pretty smooth so far. 76 00:05:33,966 --> 00:05:37,993 lf the landing's anything like this, we might as well just take a nap. 77 00:05:40,206 --> 00:05:42,367 [screaming] 78 00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:52,742 A little present from Tool Time. 79 00:05:54,687 --> 00:05:56,154 - How was your flight? - What? 80 00:05:56,222 --> 00:05:58,122 - How was your flight? - Good, thanks. 81 00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:00,125 - Good. - Tim, Captain Lloyd Jenkins. 82 00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:02,286 - Welcome aboard. - Captain. 83 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,853 Well, Captain, think you're ready for Tool Time? 84 00:06:04,931 --> 00:06:07,263 Sure, Tim. l think we're all prepared. 85 00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:22,542 Welcome to Tool Time, 86 00:06:22,615 --> 00:06:25,914 coming to you from the USS Constellation aircraft carrier. 87 00:06:25,985 --> 00:06:29,716 Thank you, Heidi, and welcome to a special Tool Time salute... 88 00:06:30,356 --> 00:06:32,381 - [plane taking off] - ...to engines 89 00:06:32,458 --> 00:06:36,224 We're in the hangar bay of the ship with the ship's captain, Lloyd Jenkins. 90 00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:38,854 - Thank you for having us on board. - Our pleasure. 91 00:06:38,931 --> 00:06:42,958 Right behind me is the Navy's most advanced fighter, the F-1 5. 92 00:06:43,536 --> 00:06:45,629 Actually, Tim, it's the F-1 8. 93 00:06:45,705 --> 00:06:48,196 Eighteen, 1 5... it's a number, isn't it? 94 00:06:48,808 --> 00:06:52,539 This baby sports twin low bypass turbo engine fans 95 00:06:52,612 --> 00:06:56,104 with a 1 600 gallon internal fuel capacity. 96 00:06:56,182 --> 00:06:58,673 - lsn't that right? - That's exactly right. 97 00:06:58,751 --> 00:07:00,685 You seem to be an expert on the Navy. 98 00:07:00,753 --> 00:07:04,621 Well, sir, as a former Seabee l like to keep my oars in the water. 99 00:07:04,690 --> 00:07:06,851 He was stationed in Nevada. 100 00:07:07,894 --> 00:07:11,796 The closest he ever got to the water was the fountain at Caesars Palace. 101 00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:16,929 Well, Captain, why don't you give us information on the Constellation? 102 00:07:17,003 --> 00:07:20,131 She's virtually a floating city, Al, with a crew of 5,500. 103 00:07:20,206 --> 00:07:22,333 She's got her own post office and hospital 104 00:07:22,408 --> 00:07:24,569 and serves over 1 8,000 meals a day. 105 00:07:24,677 --> 00:07:27,168 Now that Al's here, make that 1 9,000. 106 00:07:29,348 --> 00:07:33,580 [whispering] We've just entered the Constellation's combat direction center, 107 00:07:33,653 --> 00:07:37,885 this carrier's state-of-the-art mission control facility. 108 00:07:37,957 --> 00:07:40,517 These sailors have a tremendous responsibility. 109 00:07:40,626 --> 00:07:44,585 When mine does that at home the cursor has to be moved over to the left and in. 110 00:07:44,697 --> 00:07:47,063 - [alarm sounding] - [Tim] Whoa, whoa. 111 00:07:47,166 --> 00:07:48,827 What did l do here? 112 00:07:48,901 --> 00:07:51,870 Tim, you just declared war on Finland. 113 00:07:51,938 --> 00:07:53,303 Huh? 114 00:07:53,406 --> 00:07:54,896 l'm ready to serve, sir. 115 00:07:55,708 --> 00:07:56,868 Just kidding, Al. 116 00:07:56,976 --> 00:08:00,912 When we found out Tim was coming aboard we deactivated our weapons. 117 00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:02,345 Really. 118 00:08:05,585 --> 00:08:07,348 [speaking Spanish] 119 00:08:07,453 --> 00:08:10,889 [speaking Spanish] 120 00:08:10,957 --> 00:08:12,857 [chuckling] l think you just said, 121 00:08:12,925 --> 00:08:15,894 ''The library's between the church and the meatballs''. 122 00:08:16,796 --> 00:08:18,559 l thought that meant ''city hall''. 123 00:08:18,631 --> 00:08:21,395 No, l think ''city hall'' is... [speaks Spanish]. 124 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,560 Let's ask your mom. She knows Spanish. 125 00:08:23,636 --> 00:08:26,662 She's not home. Let's check the dictionary on my computer. 126 00:08:26,739 --> 00:08:31,267 Or in Spanish... [speaking Spanish] 127 00:08:33,246 --> 00:08:37,148 You just said, ''Let's go up and check the dictionary on my gall bladder''. 128 00:08:42,722 --> 00:08:45,247 This is the Constellation's navigation bridge. 129 00:08:45,324 --> 00:08:47,792 Al's scouting out the flight deck. [clicks] 130 00:08:47,860 --> 00:08:50,021 Al, this is great, isn't it? 131 00:08:50,096 --> 00:08:53,623 - Roger that, Tim. - Marv, follow me back here. 132 00:08:53,699 --> 00:08:55,963 Excuse me while l show them the equipment. 133 00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:58,799 A lot of impressive buttons. Sure they have safeties, 134 00:08:58,905 --> 00:09:02,170 - so you can't accidentally turn one... - [alarm sounding] 135 00:09:02,775 --> 00:09:04,470 What have l done, Captain? 136 00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:08,002 You've just activated the firefighting wash-down system 137 00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:09,445 for the entire flight deck. 138 00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:12,575 [Al] Tim! Tim, stop playing with all those buttons! 139 00:09:12,652 --> 00:09:14,119 lnteresting. 140 00:09:16,789 --> 00:09:17,813 [hissing sound] 141 00:09:17,890 --> 00:09:19,755 This is our diesel engine room, Tim. 142 00:09:19,825 --> 00:09:21,122 [banging on pipe] 143 00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:28,663 Tim, on a ship, like in a basement, you might want to watch your head. 144 00:09:32,138 --> 00:09:33,833 This is a ten-cylinder, 145 00:09:33,906 --> 00:09:38,741 1 340 horsepower, at 720 RPM, diesel engine. 146 00:09:38,811 --> 00:09:41,507 lt's a generator. lt's a back-up generator! 147 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:44,744 You put some blades on this, this baby will mow a lawn! 148 00:09:44,817 --> 00:09:46,580 [grunting] 149 00:09:48,154 --> 00:09:50,918 A whole series of steam channels over this... 150 00:09:52,658 --> 00:09:54,387 Hello, Tim. 151 00:09:56,696 --> 00:09:59,256 You remember Al Borland. Hi, Al. 152 00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:03,201 Did you start the engine segment without me? 153 00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:04,429 Yes, l did. 154 00:10:04,537 --> 00:10:07,097 And l'm certainly sorry to... [snickering] 155 00:10:07,206 --> 00:10:08,639 ...burst your bubble. 156 00:10:11,243 --> 00:10:13,473 l think this will be great. 157 00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:17,380 What l want to do is set a camera up here and shoot back in this direction 158 00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,350 so we can show the Tool Time audience 159 00:10:19,418 --> 00:10:22,182 how you guys test the engine on an F-1 4 Tomcat. 160 00:10:22,254 --> 00:10:26,156 lt's a good idea but it'll have to wait. l'm busy the next couple of hours. 161 00:10:26,225 --> 00:10:29,353 - What do you have to do? - l'm heading down to the mess deck. 162 00:10:29,428 --> 00:10:32,955 Guys from catapult maintenance are throwing Heidi a baby shower. 163 00:10:35,001 --> 00:10:36,366 A baby shower? 164 00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:38,496 Wow. 165 00:10:39,071 --> 00:10:41,801 This is the new Navy. 166 00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:14,906 Hi. l was just on my way out. 167 00:11:14,974 --> 00:11:17,408 So l can't stay and talk. l love your hair. Bye. 168 00:11:21,547 --> 00:11:23,310 Angela, l'll call you later. 169 00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:30,720 So, um, Mom, what are you doing home? 170 00:11:32,158 --> 00:11:33,716 My class was cancelled. 171 00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:38,258 What do you have to say for yourself? 172 00:11:38,330 --> 00:11:40,821 Well, your hair does look kind of good right now. 173 00:11:42,802 --> 00:11:46,363 Brad, what were you doing with a girl in your bedroom? 174 00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:49,367 Um... nothing. 175 00:11:49,442 --> 00:11:52,070 When l walked in it didn't look like nothing. 176 00:11:52,144 --> 00:11:54,305 You wouldn't have seen it if you'd knocked. 177 00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:57,474 Don't get smart. You are not allowed to have a girl in your room 178 00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:58,608 when we're not home! 179 00:11:58,684 --> 00:12:01,710 Now she'll probably never come back, thanks to you! 180 00:12:01,787 --> 00:12:04,153 Excuse me. You have a girl on your bed, 181 00:12:04,223 --> 00:12:06,589 l catch you and l'm the bad guy? 182 00:12:06,692 --> 00:12:09,252 - Mom, l didn't do anything wrong. - Really? 183 00:12:09,328 --> 00:12:12,024 What would have happened if l hadn't come home then? 184 00:12:12,098 --> 00:12:13,326 None of your business. 185 00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:15,959 You think l'm gonna talk to you about my sex life? 186 00:12:19,405 --> 00:12:20,963 [whispering] Sex life? 187 00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:29,946 When you test the F-1 4 Tomcat motor, you control it from here? 188 00:12:30,015 --> 00:12:32,279 - Where's the throttle? - lt's right there. 189 00:12:32,351 --> 00:12:36,048 That's an awful lot of power. Please try not to touch that. 190 00:12:36,122 --> 00:12:38,454 - [cell phone ringing] - Excuse me a second. 191 00:12:39,458 --> 00:12:40,755 Hello. 192 00:12:40,826 --> 00:12:43,192 Hi, Jill. Yeah. Just a second. 193 00:12:44,497 --> 00:12:46,226 Excuse me. ls everything OK? 194 00:12:46,298 --> 00:12:50,064 Not really. l think Brad might be having sex. 195 00:12:50,169 --> 00:12:51,636 - Sex? - [loud whirring] 196 00:13:12,224 --> 00:13:14,089 - Bye, Mom. - Bye, sweetie. 197 00:13:16,562 --> 00:13:18,530 - Bye, Mom. - Hey, hey. Wait a minute. 198 00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:21,794 - Remember this afternoon. - l know, Mom. l'm grounded. 199 00:13:21,867 --> 00:13:24,028 l'll be home after school, 3:06 on the dot. 200 00:13:24,136 --> 00:13:25,626 All right. 201 00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:29,269 - l'm gonna be late today. - Where are you going? 202 00:13:29,341 --> 00:13:32,310 - l'm going to David's house. - Estimated time of return? 203 00:13:32,411 --> 00:13:34,345 - 5:30? - Reason for visit? 204 00:13:34,413 --> 00:13:35,971 Gambling and devil worship. 205 00:13:41,353 --> 00:13:45,119 Don't take this Brad thing out on me. l haven't had a girl in my room yet. 206 00:13:45,191 --> 00:13:46,453 Yet? 207 00:13:46,525 --> 00:13:47,856 l gotta go. 208 00:13:51,297 --> 00:13:54,858 - Jill? - Oh! l'm so glad you're home. 209 00:13:56,635 --> 00:13:59,331 - Hi. - Not quite as glad as the Navy. 210 00:14:01,941 --> 00:14:05,104 l missed you. All right, what's the deal with Brad? 211 00:14:05,211 --> 00:14:07,509 l wish l knew. lt's time to talk to him 212 00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:10,879 - and find out how far this has gone. - Roger that. 213 00:14:10,950 --> 00:14:14,044 lt's important to pinpoint the problem and pull no punches. 214 00:14:14,119 --> 00:14:16,644 - Glad you feel that way. - Tell me how it works out. 215 00:14:16,722 --> 00:14:18,383 Hey! 216 00:14:18,991 --> 00:14:21,016 You'll be the one dealing with this. 217 00:14:21,093 --> 00:14:23,584 - Me? - Yes! You're the father. 218 00:14:23,662 --> 00:14:26,130 Why don't we just get him a book or something? 219 00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:30,302 Tim, this requires an actual discussion. 220 00:14:30,369 --> 00:14:32,633 lt's not like when we were potty training him 221 00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:36,971 - and we could just read a book. - l loved that book, Everybody Poops. 222 00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:44,508 Look, l tried to talk to him. He would not talk to me. 223 00:14:44,583 --> 00:14:47,552 lf he's gonna open up to anybody it's gonna be you. 224 00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:51,181 - What am l supposed to say? - Find out what's going on first of all. 225 00:14:51,290 --> 00:14:54,851 Then talk to him about maturity, 226 00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:58,090 responsibility and safety. 227 00:14:58,163 --> 00:15:00,495 Maturity, responsibility, safety. 228 00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:02,932 Are you sure l'm the right person for this? 229 00:15:12,278 --> 00:15:15,008 [plastic bag rustling] 230 00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:23,949 - Hey, Brad. - Hey, Dad. Do we still have a Navy? 231 00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:28,291 You do. l'm not sure they'd defend me at this point. 232 00:15:29,128 --> 00:15:32,291 - All right. See ya. - Wait. Hold on a second. 233 00:15:32,364 --> 00:15:34,730 ls there anything you'd like to ask me? 234 00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:35,892 No. 235 00:15:35,968 --> 00:15:37,833 Are you sure? 236 00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:41,406 - Yeah. - Well, if you got any questions... 237 00:15:42,608 --> 00:15:44,235 ...just holler. 238 00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:46,574 - OK. Thanks, Dad. - Any time day or night. 239 00:15:46,645 --> 00:15:49,580 - All right. Thanks. - Call me at work if you want. 240 00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,781 [sighing] That was easy. 241 00:15:57,589 --> 00:15:59,079 [Wilson] Hmm. Mm-hmm. 242 00:15:59,158 --> 00:16:01,319 Mm-hmm. 243 00:16:03,095 --> 00:16:04,790 What are you doing, Wilson? 244 00:16:04,863 --> 00:16:07,297 Well, Tim, l'm admiring my yams. 245 00:16:10,402 --> 00:16:12,233 Should l leave you alone? 246 00:16:13,539 --> 00:16:15,803 No, no, no, no, no, Tim. 247 00:16:15,874 --> 00:16:19,037 See, l'm a charter member of the tuber-of-the-month club. 248 00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:22,675 Did you realize that in New Guinea a family is judged 249 00:16:22,748 --> 00:16:24,716 by the quality of the yams they grow? 250 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:28,981 A father passes down his yam-growing skills to his children. 251 00:16:30,222 --> 00:16:32,713 Well, l just gave Brad the big sex talk. 252 00:16:35,527 --> 00:16:38,189 l don't think he's ready for the big yam talk yet. 253 00:16:39,631 --> 00:16:42,156 l thought you discussed birds and bees years ago. 254 00:16:42,234 --> 00:16:43,394 l did. 255 00:16:43,469 --> 00:16:46,700 But the bee's found a honey and he's gone a bit cuckoo. 256 00:16:48,173 --> 00:16:50,300 Oh. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. 257 00:16:50,376 --> 00:16:52,071 You seem quite at ease about it. 258 00:16:52,144 --> 00:16:56,513 l must say, l'm very impressed you can speak openly to Brad about, you know... 259 00:16:56,615 --> 00:16:57,877 - Sex. - Mm-hmm. 260 00:16:57,950 --> 00:16:59,383 [both chuckling] 261 00:17:00,152 --> 00:17:02,848 lt was a snap. lt was over in a couple seconds. 262 00:17:02,921 --> 00:17:04,183 Seconds? 263 00:17:04,256 --> 00:17:07,089 l just said, ''lf you got any questions, just holler''. 264 00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,393 And? 265 00:17:11,096 --> 00:17:13,257 And l avoided the issue. 266 00:17:13,365 --> 00:17:16,198 l said nothing and l blew the whole thing. 267 00:17:18,337 --> 00:17:20,567 Well, maybe you should just try again. 268 00:17:20,639 --> 00:17:23,130 You're right. l just want to say the right thing. 269 00:17:23,208 --> 00:17:27,167 lf l mess up and turn him off, l'm afraid he'll never come to me again. 270 00:17:27,279 --> 00:17:28,610 You know, that reminds me 271 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:31,649 of my old friend and pinochle partner, Hubert Humphrey. 272 00:17:33,085 --> 00:17:37,044 He said, ''All you have to do is be yourself 273 00:17:37,122 --> 00:17:39,818 and speak from your heart and your guts''. 274 00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:43,020 Unfortunately, l left most of my guts on an aircraft carrier. 275 00:17:43,095 --> 00:17:44,824 Your heart is in the right place. 276 00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:48,128 No. The second landing it shifted to the left just a scoshe. 277 00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:51,067 [chuckling] Tim, l think you'll do just fine. 278 00:17:51,136 --> 00:17:53,798 - You're a good friend, Wilson. - l yam what l yam. 279 00:18:04,149 --> 00:18:05,514 Hey, Brad! 280 00:18:05,617 --> 00:18:06,948 Yeah, Dad? 281 00:18:08,620 --> 00:18:10,053 [Tim exhaling] 282 00:18:11,290 --> 00:18:12,621 Uh... 283 00:18:13,625 --> 00:18:16,355 - You want to work on the hot rod? - Sure. 284 00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:17,588 Great. 285 00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:23,163 All right. Put your gloves on. l'm gonna try to tack this firewall up. 286 00:18:23,235 --> 00:18:26,204 So, how long you think it's gonna take to finish the hot rod? 287 00:18:26,305 --> 00:18:29,274 l don't know. l don't want to rush into it. 288 00:18:29,374 --> 00:18:32,673 The important things in life you don't want to rush into. 289 00:18:32,744 --> 00:18:35,042 Especially when it comes to cars and tools 290 00:18:35,114 --> 00:18:37,582 you want to take your time and do things right. 291 00:18:37,649 --> 00:18:41,016 Exactly. But that rule doesn't just apply to cars and tools. 292 00:18:41,086 --> 00:18:44,317 You also want to take your time when you're gonna have... 293 00:18:44,389 --> 00:18:45,754 ...food. 294 00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:53,522 - What do you mean? - You know that Polish smorgasbord? 295 00:18:53,599 --> 00:18:55,624 You don't go right up to Olga and say, 296 00:18:55,701 --> 00:18:59,193 ''l want all the kielbasa and all the sauerkraut right now''. 297 00:18:59,271 --> 00:19:00,829 [chuckling] You do! 298 00:19:02,074 --> 00:19:04,770 All right. Bad example, bad example. Football. 299 00:19:04,843 --> 00:19:06,777 You don't go right in and try to score. 300 00:19:06,845 --> 00:19:09,541 - You don't? - ln football you do. You do. 301 00:19:10,782 --> 00:19:13,307 Gardening, gardening, think gardening. 302 00:19:13,385 --> 00:19:16,286 You don't plant your flower unless your bed's made. 303 00:19:16,355 --> 00:19:18,323 No. No, no, no! 304 00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:26,963 Maybe it's me. l have no clue what you're trying to say. 305 00:19:27,032 --> 00:19:28,363 lt isn't just you. 306 00:19:32,604 --> 00:19:36,062 - l wanna talk about you and Angela. - There's nothing to talk about. 307 00:19:36,141 --> 00:19:38,371 - l want to talk about sex. - l don't want... 308 00:19:38,443 --> 00:19:41,071 l want you to listen to me, please. Listen up. 309 00:19:41,146 --> 00:19:43,011 Sex is, um... 310 00:19:43,081 --> 00:19:44,571 lt's like a car. 311 00:19:44,650 --> 00:19:46,117 The best idea 312 00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:50,519 is to keep the car in the garage for a long, long, long time. 313 00:19:53,492 --> 00:19:56,461 And then, somewhere in the future, the distant future, 314 00:19:56,562 --> 00:19:58,393 when that garage door opens, 315 00:19:58,463 --> 00:20:01,364 you gotta think, ''car cover''. 316 00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:14,038 Look, Dad, l know about safe sex. There's nothing to worry about. 317 00:20:14,112 --> 00:20:16,205 lf you're having sex there is. 318 00:20:16,281 --> 00:20:19,148 l'm not having sex. Not with Angela, not with anybody. 319 00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:22,051 l know that. That's good. Of course not. 320 00:20:26,858 --> 00:20:29,156 So, Dad, how old were you your first time? 321 00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:30,525 What? 322 00:20:32,297 --> 00:20:33,730 Uh... 37. 323 00:20:38,337 --> 00:20:40,828 l thought you wanted to have a real talk. 324 00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:44,903 Well, l was a few years older than you. 325 00:20:44,977 --> 00:20:48,242 But l was still way too young. l knew nothing about women. 326 00:20:49,047 --> 00:20:51,607 - You didn't? - l knew the mechanics of it. 327 00:20:51,717 --> 00:20:54,880 But l didn't realize how much responsibility was involved 328 00:20:54,953 --> 00:20:57,615 in having an intimate relationship with girls. 329 00:20:59,224 --> 00:21:00,384 Wow. 330 00:21:00,459 --> 00:21:02,689 l never heard you talk like this before. 331 00:21:02,761 --> 00:21:06,253 Well, it's kind of hard for me to talk about stuff like this with you. 332 00:21:06,331 --> 00:21:09,300 lt's hard for me to talk about stuff like this with Mom. 333 00:21:10,535 --> 00:21:13,993 But we opened a line of communication and l want to keep it that way. 334 00:21:14,072 --> 00:21:17,701 Some guys l hang out with think that by having sex it makes you a man. 335 00:21:17,776 --> 00:21:19,539 l used to think that, too. 336 00:21:19,645 --> 00:21:23,877 But l think the truth is, you should be a man first and then think about sex. 337 00:21:26,118 --> 00:21:28,746 So, what do you think? How many years away am l? 338 00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:33,850 Well... there's no set number of years. 339 00:21:34,660 --> 00:21:38,357 - When will l know when l'm a man? - Your mom and l will tell you. 340 00:21:47,906 --> 00:21:49,874 So, how are you feeling? 341 00:21:49,941 --> 00:21:51,568 Oh, fat. 342 00:21:52,511 --> 00:21:54,445 Just hope you never get pregnant. 343 00:21:55,347 --> 00:21:57,315 - l think you look great. - Thank you. 344 00:21:57,416 --> 00:21:58,849 Heidi, here's a tip. 345 00:21:58,917 --> 00:22:01,579 When it comes time for diapers, l recommend cloth. 346 00:22:01,653 --> 00:22:03,712 - Really? - Softer on a baby's bottom. 347 00:22:03,789 --> 00:22:05,723 But disposables are so convenient. 348 00:22:05,791 --> 00:22:08,259 Ladies, trying to do a show here! 349 00:22:09,061 --> 00:22:10,824 - Sorry. - Sorry, Mr. Taylor.