1
00:00:01,334 --> 00:00:03,632
l'll settle my bill for the month.
Let me see it.
2
00:00:03,703 --> 00:00:05,170
OK.
3
00:00:06,206 --> 00:00:08,640
- Ah. Here you go.
- All right.
4
00:00:09,175 --> 00:00:10,540
Whoa.
5
00:00:13,413 --> 00:00:16,177
And Jill said
l couldn't control myself. Whoa.
6
00:00:17,984 --> 00:00:19,884
Hey, guys.
Guess what?
7
00:00:19,953 --> 00:00:24,117
l have just been asked to star
in my very own video!
8
00:00:24,224 --> 00:00:26,658
[chuckling] The Al Borland Workout?
9
00:00:28,495 --> 00:00:31,589
Abs of Flab.
10
00:00:31,664 --> 00:00:35,225
That's something you want to see,
Al in a thong.
11
00:00:35,335 --> 00:00:37,860
''All right, girls, two, three...
Watch those carbs.
12
00:00:37,937 --> 00:00:40,667
Come on. Late night snacks,
that's a no-no.''
13
00:00:40,740 --> 00:00:43,004
lt's not an exercise video.
14
00:00:43,076 --> 00:00:46,375
lt's called,
How to Stock Your Toolbox.
15
00:00:46,913 --> 00:00:51,077
l will show beginners the tools
they need and how to use them.
16
00:00:51,651 --> 00:00:53,551
- Actually, you'd be good at that.
- Yeah.
17
00:00:53,620 --> 00:00:55,554
Hey, can l be in your video?
18
00:00:55,622 --> 00:00:59,558
We never put you on Tool Time.
Why would Al put you in a video?
19
00:00:59,626 --> 00:01:02,356
l got a lot of experience
in dinner theater.
20
00:01:05,565 --> 00:01:08,625
- You were an actor?
- No, a waiter.
21
00:01:11,438 --> 00:01:15,067
Well, l'm sorry, but casting
is entirely up to the producer.
22
00:01:15,141 --> 00:01:16,506
Yeah? Who's producing it?
23
00:01:16,576 --> 00:01:17,736
l am.
24
00:01:18,945 --> 00:01:21,038
But l would have to talk to my director.
25
00:01:21,114 --> 00:01:23,173
Who are you getting to direct it?
26
00:01:23,249 --> 00:01:25,809
Well, l would need someone experienced,
you know.
27
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:28,479
Who knows tools, knows television
28
00:01:28,555 --> 00:01:30,853
and the Al Borland personality.
29
00:01:31,558 --> 00:01:34,322
Boy, that will be tough.
There is no Al Borland personality.
30
00:01:34,394 --> 00:01:38,956
You see? That's the humor that tells me
you're the man for the job.
31
00:01:40,333 --> 00:01:42,164
You want me to direct it?
32
00:01:42,235 --> 00:01:45,204
Tim, you took Tool Time
from the ground up.
33
00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:50,004
You gave it a visual style that has not
been seen on a cable television show.
34
00:01:50,844 --> 00:01:54,007
- Face it. You're a legend, Tim.
- Ah, yes.
35
00:01:56,182 --> 00:01:58,309
There's no money in this, is there?
36
00:02:00,420 --> 00:02:01,978
Not a nickel.
37
00:02:03,656 --> 00:02:06,022
And if you could bring a sack lunch...
38
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,896
Hey! You could film it right here.
39
00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,795
lt'd be great publicity for the store.
40
00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:15,733
Well, as producer,
l would have to talk to my director.
41
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:25,934
Well, as director,
l would have to OK it with my producer.
42
00:02:26,012 --> 00:02:27,570
Yeah!
43
00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:20,658
- You got a new computer.
- [Jill] Yeah.
44
00:03:20,733 --> 00:03:23,759
Your father crashed my old one
for the tenth time.
45
00:03:23,836 --> 00:03:27,602
The guy at the store said l should get
something small and easy to hide.
46
00:03:29,108 --> 00:03:31,338
- lt's a really cool laptop.
- Yeah.
47
00:03:31,411 --> 00:03:32,571
lt really is.
48
00:03:32,645 --> 00:03:37,309
l have a CD-ROM, a scanner
and l'm not sure what's in that box.
49
00:03:37,383 --> 00:03:39,544
lt's Styrofoam packing material.
50
00:03:40,920 --> 00:03:43,855
- Not that.
- Oh, that's the external tape drive.
51
00:03:43,923 --> 00:03:48,189
l hope you know this is a lot more
sophisticated than your old computer.
52
00:03:48,261 --> 00:03:49,922
- OK, l'm ready to go.
- Not quite.
53
00:03:49,996 --> 00:03:52,965
Before you boot up your CPU you gotta
connect your peripherals.
54
00:03:53,032 --> 00:03:54,556
Then load all your drivers.
55
00:03:54,634 --> 00:03:56,465
Then you've got to load your software,
56
00:03:56,536 --> 00:03:59,300
making sure you still have a terminator
in your SCSl port.
57
00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:02,034
- What?
- You gotta program your new computer
58
00:04:02,108 --> 00:04:06,169
to interface with your old printer by
selecting the driver from the chooser.
59
00:04:06,980 --> 00:04:08,277
- Good luck.
- All right.
60
00:04:08,348 --> 00:04:09,610
Have fun.
61
00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:12,284
- Thanks, guys.
- [whistling]
62
00:04:12,352 --> 00:04:15,116
Hey. You got your new computer.
63
00:04:15,221 --> 00:04:17,155
Yippee-ai-kai-aye-ai-oh.
64
00:04:17,223 --> 00:04:18,781
Look at all that stuff there.
65
00:04:20,059 --> 00:04:22,425
l hope you got my favorite game,
Monkey Town.
66
00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:25,325
lt didn't come with any games.
67
00:04:25,398 --> 00:04:27,298
Boy, they saw you coming.
68
00:04:29,102 --> 00:04:32,538
Tim, this is not a toy.
This is a serious tool.
69
00:04:33,539 --> 00:04:37,031
Now come over here and see all
the way-fun stuff l got to go with it.
70
00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:40,939
l can't play now.
l gotta do my research.
71
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:43,141
l'm directing my first ''how-to'' video.
72
00:04:43,216 --> 00:04:44,843
That's great. ls that for Binford?
73
00:04:44,917 --> 00:04:48,182
No, it's kind of a low-budget company
Al got hooked up with.
74
00:04:48,254 --> 00:04:49,585
But if l do the video right,
75
00:04:49,656 --> 00:04:52,352
l might be able to sell Binford
on doing ''how-to'' videos.
76
00:04:52,425 --> 00:04:54,757
l could be the next Hitchcock.
77
00:04:54,827 --> 00:04:57,853
Tim, Alfred Hitchcock didn't direct
any ''how-to'' videos.
78
00:04:57,930 --> 00:05:00,899
Not Alfred Hitchcock.
Herb Hitchcock!
79
00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:05,771
He's famous. The first one:
How to Make a Cabinet.
80
00:05:06,506 --> 00:05:08,770
How to Repair a Rock.
That was a great one.
81
00:05:10,543 --> 00:05:12,204
How to Make a Table.
82
00:05:12,278 --> 00:05:14,803
Oh, my favorite.
How to Make a Table, Part Deux.
83
00:05:17,383 --> 00:05:21,012
lsn't that the one you forced me
to watch on our wedding night?
84
00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:25,419
No, that was
What to do About a Squeaky Bed.
85
00:05:28,094 --> 00:05:31,063
And action.
86
00:05:31,130 --> 00:05:35,590
Welcome to
How to Start Your Toolbox.
87
00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,693
l'm Al Borland, your host.
88
00:05:37,770 --> 00:05:39,067
Al Borland.
89
00:05:41,741 --> 00:05:44,107
Take a stroll with me down aisle one,
90
00:05:44,210 --> 00:05:49,079
as we explore the exciting world
of screwdrivers.
91
00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,382
[Tim] Cut. Good. Let's move on.
92
00:05:53,453 --> 00:05:54,977
OK.
93
00:05:55,054 --> 00:05:58,023
- Where do you want me to stand?
- Out of the way.
94
00:05:58,124 --> 00:05:59,250
OK.
95
00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:02,756
This is gonna be a panoramic shot
of the screwdriver aisle.
96
00:06:02,829 --> 00:06:04,888
Why don't you come down here,
long shot.
97
00:06:04,964 --> 00:06:07,091
Let's start with
the slotted screwdrivers
98
00:06:07,166 --> 00:06:10,727
and zoom in on the Phillips head
and a nice dramatic tilt up
99
00:06:10,803 --> 00:06:12,896
to the torque screwdrivers in the back.
100
00:06:12,972 --> 00:06:15,873
Well, Tim, we don't have time
for all this artsy camera work.
101
00:06:15,942 --> 00:06:18,274
- We have two days to do this.
- l got the shots here.
102
00:06:18,344 --> 00:06:22,110
Well, my idea for the video
is to be simple and direct.
103
00:06:22,181 --> 00:06:23,671
l'll take simple and direct
104
00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:26,913
and expand it, mold it, shape it
and make it good.
105
00:06:28,821 --> 00:06:31,847
Come on, trust me, my little pumpkin.
Come on.
106
00:06:33,326 --> 00:06:35,294
And action.
107
00:06:37,130 --> 00:06:40,190
[Tim] Pull back from
the combination wrenches. Not so fast!
108
00:06:41,134 --> 00:06:43,864
Come on. Not so fast.
All right. Steady.
109
00:06:43,936 --> 00:06:45,836
Slow pan across the ratchets.
110
00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:49,069
Cut. Perfect.
111
00:06:49,142 --> 00:06:50,632
One more time.
112
00:06:52,378 --> 00:06:54,039
lf it was perfect, why one more time?
113
00:06:54,113 --> 00:06:55,239
l got a vision.
114
00:06:55,314 --> 00:06:57,407
Start on a tight shot
of the ratchet wrench,
115
00:06:57,483 --> 00:07:00,452
which is the heart and soul
of the wrench family. Can you feel it?
116
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:03,956
Tim, l-l-l... We're starting
to get way behind schedule.
117
00:07:04,023 --> 00:07:07,186
- We have to be out by 4:00.
- Harry will let us shoot past 4:00.
118
00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:09,124
Yeah, sure, if you got a part for me.
119
00:07:09,195 --> 00:07:10,924
You know, l do a great Brando.
120
00:07:10,997 --> 00:07:13,329
[imitating Marlon Brando] Stella!
121
00:07:19,572 --> 00:07:21,665
We can be out by 4:00.
122
00:07:23,309 --> 00:07:24,799
Get that shot.
Just come down...
123
00:07:24,877 --> 00:07:28,313
All right, Manuel.
Chisel sequence, take 1 6.
124
00:07:31,684 --> 00:07:36,212
Focus, Al, and have some fun, buddy.
Action.
125
00:07:37,323 --> 00:07:38,950
Chisels...
126
00:07:46,599 --> 00:07:51,764
...are categorized by the type
of material that they are used for.
127
00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:56,002
Wood, metal, masonry.
128
00:07:56,108 --> 00:07:58,372
- Cut.
- What? What! What?
129
00:07:58,444 --> 00:07:59,809
lt's good. lt's good.
130
00:07:59,912 --> 00:08:03,211
Can you combine take three and take six?
A little of nine in there?
131
00:08:03,282 --> 00:08:04,772
All right.
132
00:08:06,185 --> 00:08:07,743
lmagine
133
00:08:07,854 --> 00:08:10,345
that your father
left your mother for a chisel.
134
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:13,554
- What?
- Use that. Go with that. Go!
135
00:08:14,760 --> 00:08:18,127
Sorry, Tim. l'm all out of tape.
l'm gonna run to the truck and get some.
136
00:08:18,197 --> 00:08:19,357
[groaning]
137
00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:22,501
Well, it's a good time
for some make-up.
138
00:08:22,568 --> 00:08:24,263
Do l need a touch-up?
139
00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:27,602
You're fine but the tools are all shiny.
Get some powder!
140
00:08:28,174 --> 00:08:29,698
Who can powder?
141
00:08:29,775 --> 00:08:32,266
Am l the only one working on this thing?
142
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:34,472
Where's the powder? Manuel!
143
00:08:35,248 --> 00:08:36,374
Harry!
144
00:08:37,884 --> 00:08:39,852
[imitating Brando] You talkin' to me?
145
00:08:41,454 --> 00:08:43,354
You talking to me?
146
00:08:43,422 --> 00:08:46,687
Harry, l can't worry about
your acting career right now.
147
00:08:46,759 --> 00:08:48,192
We gotta be done by tomorrow.
148
00:08:48,261 --> 00:08:49,489
Tim is way behind.
149
00:08:49,562 --> 00:08:52,622
l can't give you any more time.
l got customers outside waiting.
150
00:08:52,698 --> 00:08:53,960
l know.
151
00:08:55,034 --> 00:08:58,333
Hey, guys. You know you got customers
waiting out here?
152
00:08:58,404 --> 00:09:02,363
You guys are gonna have to leave!
We're shooting a video! Come on!
153
00:09:04,343 --> 00:09:08,302
- He is completely out of control.
- He just ran off paying customers.
154
00:09:08,414 --> 00:09:10,974
Uh, man, what am l supposed to do?
155
00:09:11,684 --> 00:09:13,242
l know what l'd do.
156
00:09:13,352 --> 00:09:15,115
l'd get a new director.
157
00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:17,348
l can't fire Tim.
158
00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:18,981
He's my good friend.
159
00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:21,925
l-l'm gonna have to reason with him.
160
00:09:24,964 --> 00:09:26,261
Uh, Tim.
161
00:09:26,332 --> 00:09:30,962
Uh, you know, l'm having a problem
with the way this is going.
162
00:09:31,037 --> 00:09:33,267
As your director,
l'll say you're the actor.
163
00:09:33,339 --> 00:09:35,307
Act like you're not having a problem.
164
00:09:35,374 --> 00:09:36,864
l'm also the producer.
165
00:09:37,476 --> 00:09:41,378
You should be worried about producing
a good performance, little bumpkin.
166
00:09:41,447 --> 00:09:44,610
What did l tell you about coming in?
Get out of here!
167
00:09:45,484 --> 00:09:49,420
You're right. You're right.
l have to fire him. How do l do that?
168
00:09:50,222 --> 00:09:52,713
Frankly, Al, l don't give a damn.
169
00:09:57,797 --> 00:09:59,731
Uh, look, Tim, about the video...
170
00:09:59,799 --> 00:10:01,926
Now, the way you've been going,
171
00:10:02,001 --> 00:10:04,765
there's no chance of us
being able to finish tomorrow.
172
00:10:04,837 --> 00:10:06,862
l'm glad you brought that up.
173
00:10:06,939 --> 00:10:09,999
We'll go back to the production company
and ask for more time.
174
00:10:10,076 --> 00:10:15,139
lt might be a good idea to ask them for
a little bit more do-re-mi, you know?
175
00:10:15,214 --> 00:10:17,375
l was thinking of getting
a new director.
176
00:10:22,555 --> 00:10:25,683
- You're thinking about firing me?
- You give me no choice.
177
00:10:25,758 --> 00:10:28,090
You've taken a simple
instructional video
178
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:30,253
and turned it into
Gone With the Wind.
179
00:10:30,329 --> 00:10:34,231
Yeah, but without my help, your video
crew's gonna be gone with the wind!
180
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:38,168
l think there are some people out there
who like the Al Borland style.
181
00:10:38,237 --> 00:10:42,196
Maybe that is why they asked me
to star in it instead of you.
182
00:10:42,274 --> 00:10:44,504
They picked you
'cause they couldn't afford me!
183
00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:46,602
You're a deluded egomaniac.
184
00:10:46,679 --> 00:10:48,943
And you're a chubby little flannel man.
185
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:54,912
May l tempt you with some alluring
creations from our pastry chef?
186
00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:56,887
The tiramisu is quite fetching.
187
00:10:56,956 --> 00:11:00,687
- Just fetch the check, please.
- Also an excellent choice.
188
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:02,250
l will take that.
189
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,888
You're gonna buy off your guilt
by paying for dinner?
190
00:11:04,964 --> 00:11:06,932
- l don't think so.
- Oh, no!
191
00:11:07,033 --> 00:11:09,001
- Give it to me. Come here.
- Oh, no!
192
00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:13,767
You see?
Everything has to be done your way!
193
00:11:13,839 --> 00:11:15,500
- The right way.
- Fine!
194
00:11:15,574 --> 00:11:16,541
- Fine.
- Fine!
195
00:11:19,311 --> 00:11:20,869
- Fine!
- Fine.
196
00:11:24,050 --> 00:11:26,746
l will have to add some dessert to that.
197
00:11:34,126 --> 00:11:36,788
OK. What do you think
of this screen name?
198
00:11:37,663 --> 00:11:39,528
''Sick of tools''?
199
00:11:40,733 --> 00:11:42,598
- You can't use that.
- Why not?
200
00:11:42,668 --> 00:11:45,228
That's my screen name.
201
00:11:47,973 --> 00:11:50,999
Al Borland is a no-talent,
worthless bum.
202
00:11:51,077 --> 00:11:53,204
Tim! Guess who's here? llene!
203
00:11:55,281 --> 00:11:56,908
Hello, llene.
Good to see you.
204
00:11:57,550 --> 00:11:58,710
New perm?
205
00:11:58,818 --> 00:12:01,378
Why are you saying such
terrible things about my Al?
206
00:12:01,487 --> 00:12:03,648
'Cause your Al just fired me.
207
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:05,987
Your Al fired my Tim!
208
00:12:07,393 --> 00:12:08,826
What happened?
209
00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:12,057
We had totally opposite visions
on how to produce this video.
210
00:12:12,164 --> 00:12:14,325
So, it was creative differences.
211
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:17,164
Yeah. l'm creative, he's different.
212
00:12:19,371 --> 00:12:21,498
All he cared about
is schedules and budgets.
213
00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:23,303
Schedule, budget. Too much time...
214
00:12:23,375 --> 00:12:26,936
OK, look. He gave you two days
to shoot a 60-minute video.
215
00:12:27,046 --> 00:12:29,344
- How much did you get done today?
- Today?
216
00:12:29,415 --> 00:12:30,575
- The first day?
- Right.
217
00:12:30,683 --> 00:12:33,174
Well, you put it...
You know, you had to...
218
00:12:33,252 --> 00:12:36,710
You had to put it all...
Once you... About five minutes.
219
00:12:36,789 --> 00:12:38,723
That's all?
220
00:12:38,791 --> 00:12:40,691
No wonder he fired you!
221
00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:43,456
l've gotta go.
Al must be really hurting right now.
222
00:12:43,529 --> 00:12:45,360
- [Jill] OK.
- He's hurting?
223
00:12:45,431 --> 00:12:48,559
- l was the one that got axed.
- You've got Jill to comfort you.
224
00:12:48,634 --> 00:12:50,329
[scoffs]
225
00:12:50,402 --> 00:12:52,097
You know how to comfort me.
226
00:12:53,305 --> 00:12:54,863
Five minutes?
227
00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:58,569
- lt was a brilliant five minutes.
- You are so pathetic.
228
00:12:58,644 --> 00:13:00,703
And the comfort would come from?
229
00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:04,845
Al, come on.
We're on in ten.
230
00:13:04,917 --> 00:13:06,384
Thank you, Heidi.
231
00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:11,086
Hello, Tim.
232
00:13:11,157 --> 00:13:12,522
Hello, Al.
233
00:13:14,093 --> 00:13:16,618
Well, you gonna finish
doing that video tonight?
234
00:13:16,695 --> 00:13:17,992
Yes, l am.
235
00:13:18,063 --> 00:13:19,792
Thank you for asking.
236
00:13:20,599 --> 00:13:22,066
You're welcome.
237
00:13:23,169 --> 00:13:25,535
Well, we should have
a good show today, Al.
238
00:13:25,604 --> 00:13:28,539
Yes, we should.
l always enjoy sealant week.
239
00:13:32,344 --> 00:13:34,039
Does everybody know what time it is?
240
00:13:34,113 --> 00:13:36,479
- Tool Time!
- That's right.
241
00:13:36,549 --> 00:13:39,643
Binford Tools is proud to present
Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor.
242
00:13:39,718 --> 00:13:41,879
[cheering]
243
00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:47,990
Thank you.
244
00:13:48,060 --> 00:13:49,493
You're too kind.
245
00:13:50,162 --> 00:13:51,720
Thank you.
Well.
246
00:13:52,398 --> 00:13:53,524
Welcome to Tool Time.
247
00:13:53,599 --> 00:13:55,567
l'm, of course,
Tim ''The Tool Man'' Taylor.
248
00:13:55,634 --> 00:13:58,330
You all know my assistant, Al Borland.
249
00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:02,797
All this week it's sealant week.
Today we're talkin' about caulkin'.
250
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:07,638
To help us out we have master plumber,
Felix Myman.
251
00:14:07,713 --> 00:14:09,874
Let's bring him out
with a Tool Time welcome.
252
00:14:13,919 --> 00:14:15,944
- Thank you.
- Always nice to have you on.
253
00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:18,512
- Always a pleasure to be here.
- Nice to see you again.
254
00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:22,618
Today Felix is gonna show us the proper
way to caulk a toilet, shower or sink.
255
00:14:22,695 --> 00:14:26,654
And l can also show you how to caulk
your windows and glass doors.
256
00:14:26,765 --> 00:14:28,062
Good, we'll see that later.
257
00:14:28,133 --> 00:14:32,194
ln the interest of time, why don't we
concentrate just on bathroom fixtures?
258
00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:36,230
Al's always interested in saving time,
even at the expense of quality.
259
00:14:36,308 --> 00:14:38,640
l am all for quality, but time is money.
260
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:42,203
- Always money? That how you see it?
- Getting back to caulking...
261
00:14:43,415 --> 00:14:44,746
There are different types:
262
00:14:44,817 --> 00:14:47,980
Acrylic with latex,
oil-based and silicone.
263
00:14:48,087 --> 00:14:50,851
Marv, why don't you come in
and get a nice product shot here?
264
00:14:50,956 --> 00:14:54,858
Why not a panoramic shot, Tim?
Bring in a crane.
265
00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:58,454
We could rip off the roof
and get a shot from a helicopter.
266
00:14:59,498 --> 00:15:02,831
Felix, do you see any problem
with a guy showing pride in his work?
267
00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:04,733
l'm just here to caulk a toilet.
268
00:15:06,705 --> 00:15:09,606
Why don't we get back to
the different types of caulking guns?
269
00:15:09,675 --> 00:15:10,972
Yes, why don't we?
270
00:15:11,043 --> 00:15:13,910
Uh, those are electric guns.
You might want to be careful...
271
00:15:13,979 --> 00:15:15,207
[grunts]
272
00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:20,413
- ...with those triggers.
- l didn't mean to do that.
273
00:15:20,486 --> 00:15:21,714
You'll have to excuse Tim.
274
00:15:21,787 --> 00:15:24,119
He has a tough time
keeping things under control.
275
00:15:24,189 --> 00:15:25,884
l know how to control myself, Al.
276
00:15:31,397 --> 00:15:34,889
l am so sorry, Felix.
l am so sorry!
277
00:15:34,967 --> 00:15:37,265
- l don't need this.
- [stammering]
278
00:15:37,336 --> 00:15:40,567
l could be cleaning out a septic tank.
279
00:15:54,853 --> 00:15:56,753
Move over!
280
00:16:05,831 --> 00:16:08,561
- [Tim] Hey, Wilson.
- Shalom, good neighbor.
281
00:16:08,634 --> 00:16:10,329
OK.
282
00:16:10,402 --> 00:16:13,496
Well, you finished
your vegetable hut.
283
00:16:13,572 --> 00:16:15,699
l'm sure it commemorates something.
284
00:16:15,774 --> 00:16:17,799
This, Tim, is a sukkah.
285
00:16:18,510 --> 00:16:23,004
lt is what is built for the Jewish
harvest festival of Sukkot.
286
00:16:23,082 --> 00:16:24,913
Which, yes indeed, does commemorate
287
00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:27,544
the ancient Hebrews
wandering through the desert.
288
00:16:27,619 --> 00:16:31,146
l'd be wandering around
looking for the bathroom.
289
00:16:31,223 --> 00:16:35,159
Actually, the tribes of lsrael have
celebrated in these symbolic structures
290
00:16:35,227 --> 00:16:36,990
for thousands of years.
291
00:16:38,030 --> 00:16:41,056
lt'll be a thousand years
before l celebrate with Al again.
292
00:16:41,133 --> 00:16:43,693
He'll pick caulk out of his beard
till the next Sukkot.
293
00:16:44,737 --> 00:16:48,104
You're still smarting from the sting
of getting fired from Al's video.
294
00:16:48,207 --> 00:16:50,334
Well, he's impossible to work with.
295
00:16:50,409 --> 00:16:52,775
You've worked with him
for years on Tool Time.
296
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,813
That's because l'm the boss
on Tool Time.
297
00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:56,370
Mm-hmm. Hmm. Hmm.
298
00:16:56,448 --> 00:16:59,713
You know, Tim, this reminds me
of a famous quote by Aristotle.
299
00:17:01,553 --> 00:17:05,045
''He who has not learned to obey
cannot be a great leader.''
300
00:17:05,124 --> 00:17:07,649
l should have let him do it his way.
l had this vision.
301
00:17:07,726 --> 00:17:11,492
l was gonna do something magnificent,
trying to emulate the great Hitchcock.
302
00:17:11,563 --> 00:17:15,124
- Alfred or Herb?
- The director! Herb.
303
00:17:15,667 --> 00:17:18,830
No, no, no, no, Tim. You don't
want to emulate Herb Hitchcock.
304
00:17:18,937 --> 00:17:21,667
- l do. He's fabulous.
- He was kicked out of the business,
305
00:17:21,740 --> 00:17:25,267
- That's what everybody says.
- for going wildly over budget.
306
00:17:25,344 --> 00:17:26,709
He hired a cast of thousands
307
00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:30,840
for the staining scene
in How to Make a Table part three.
308
00:17:30,916 --> 00:17:32,645
lt was brilliant.
309
00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:35,346
Staining a table during a chariot race.
Come on!
310
00:17:38,023 --> 00:17:40,958
Hand drill sequence take one.
311
00:17:41,026 --> 00:17:43,290
And action.
312
00:17:47,666 --> 00:17:51,124
Every toolbox needs a hand drill.
lsn't that right, sir?
313
00:17:51,837 --> 00:17:53,464
Absolutely.
314
00:17:55,374 --> 00:17:57,604
Cut. All right, that's good.
Moving on.
315
00:17:58,310 --> 00:18:01,541
One more shot we're done. Set up here,
l'll go get the props.
316
00:18:01,613 --> 00:18:03,774
Uh, just a quick suggestion.
317
00:18:03,849 --> 00:18:06,511
l think it would be great
if we ended with a song.
318
00:18:07,352 --> 00:18:09,912
No singing, no dancing
and no ad-libbing.
319
00:18:14,893 --> 00:18:16,793
- Hey, Harry.
- Go away.
320
00:18:16,862 --> 00:18:20,161
- l'm not gonna drive away customers.
- l'm not worried about that.
321
00:18:20,232 --> 00:18:22,530
l am in the middle of a performance.
322
00:18:27,039 --> 00:18:28,529
Hi, Al.
323
00:18:28,607 --> 00:18:30,472
- What are you doing here?
- Well,
324
00:18:30,542 --> 00:18:33,238
l'm thinking about the immortal words
of Aristotle.
325
00:18:33,312 --> 00:18:37,442
''Only the boss should be able to invite
a thousand people to have dessert.''
326
00:18:39,918 --> 00:18:42,443
Must have lost something
in the translation.
327
00:18:44,156 --> 00:18:46,852
You were the boss.
l should have let you do it your way.
328
00:18:46,925 --> 00:18:48,620
Well, yes, you should have.
329
00:18:48,694 --> 00:18:52,221
But l didn't and now you are
and it's working out, right?
330
00:18:52,297 --> 00:18:55,266
Could we?
l'm falling out of character.
331
00:18:56,502 --> 00:18:59,801
l'll let you get back to work.
l'll see you tomorrow on Tool Time.
332
00:18:59,872 --> 00:19:01,533
- Yeah, all right.
- Great.
333
00:19:03,575 --> 00:19:06,339
- Ah, wait, Tim. Tim!
- [Harry groaning]
334
00:19:06,411 --> 00:19:11,314
l'm getting ready for my big finale.
You know, clamps and vise grips.
335
00:19:11,383 --> 00:19:14,944
- Good.
- l don't know where to put the camera.
336
00:19:15,053 --> 00:19:17,419
- You don't need my opinion.
- l know l don't.
337
00:19:17,489 --> 00:19:19,218
But l want it, you know.
338
00:19:19,291 --> 00:19:22,556
l looked at that first five minutes.
lt was really, really good.
339
00:19:22,628 --> 00:19:25,188
- Right up there with Hitchcock.
- Really?
340
00:19:25,264 --> 00:19:26,390
Almost.
341
00:19:27,599 --> 00:19:29,157
OK. Um...
342
00:19:29,268 --> 00:19:32,601
Forget the clamps and vise grips.
You want a big finish, go to knives.
343
00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:36,437
Have a low pan. Have Manuel come in top
over the blades, scoot down this way.
344
00:19:36,542 --> 00:19:38,976
Tilt up, see all the blades
shiny and sharp.
345
00:19:39,044 --> 00:19:41,706
And then a big finish to...
346
00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:44,442
Actually, your idea would be better,
you know.
347
00:19:44,516 --> 00:19:46,450
- Vise grips and clamps.
- Yeah?
348
00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:49,146
And to simplify the shot
just shoot from here.
349
00:19:49,221 --> 00:19:51,382
Then there's more drama
because you see it all.
350
00:19:51,456 --> 00:19:54,619
Look, it's my store and l want to sing
at the end of the video.
351
00:19:56,295 --> 00:19:58,763
- Harry...
- No, no, no, no, no.
352
00:19:58,830 --> 00:20:00,855
Now there's an idea.
Hold on a minute.
353
00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:05,896
Your song would be much more effective
if you had a big entrance, wouldn't it?
354
00:20:05,971 --> 00:20:08,337
- See? Now we're talking.
- An entrance?
355
00:20:08,407 --> 00:20:10,466
- Maybe from the storeroom.
- Yes.
356
00:20:10,542 --> 00:20:12,669
You know, you could enter in here.
357
00:20:12,744 --> 00:20:14,371
Wait for your cue.
358
00:20:14,446 --> 00:20:17,210
l'm sure we can get some music in later.
359
00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:22,216
[pounding on door]
Hey, l can't hear the music!
360
00:20:23,288 --> 00:20:24,812
We're back!
361
00:20:29,394 --> 00:20:32,557
OK. l've loaded all the research data.
362
00:20:32,664 --> 00:20:35,599
- Now what do l do?
- You pay your computer consultant.
363
00:20:38,437 --> 00:20:40,997
How about dinner
and a roof over your head?
364
00:20:41,106 --> 00:20:43,267
Fair enough.
365
00:20:43,375 --> 00:20:47,004
Hit F9. lt will take a couple minutes
to do the calculations.
366
00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:50,571
Make sure you hit ''save'' when it says
''done'' or you'll lose all your work.
367
00:20:50,649 --> 00:20:53,083
- OK, thanks. Thanks, sweetie.
- Bye, Mom.
368
00:20:54,019 --> 00:20:55,577
[buzzing]
369
00:21:02,861 --> 00:21:04,351
[electronic beeping]
370
00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:06,727
lt says ''done''.
Time for Monkey Town.
371
00:21:10,335 --> 00:21:12,701
- [conga music plays]
- [monkey screeching]
372
00:21:18,176 --> 00:21:20,076
Oh, my God.
What are you doing?
373
00:21:20,145 --> 00:21:21,669
Hold it, hold it, hold it.
374
00:21:22,681 --> 00:21:25,172
l'm picking the lice off my sister
right now.
375
00:21:27,552 --> 00:21:29,110
Have you saved my work?
376
00:21:29,187 --> 00:21:30,882
lt's just a bunch of numbers.
377
00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:32,082
Tim!
378
00:21:32,157 --> 00:21:35,422
Hold on, l'm 50 bananas away
from being mayor of Monkey Town.
379
00:21:36,495 --> 00:21:37,757
Hold on for a second.
380
00:21:37,829 --> 00:21:39,763
[screeching continues]
381
00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:44,762
- What was that all about?
- You lose my work, l off your monkey.
382
00:21:46,271 --> 00:21:48,171
[screeching]
383
00:21:52,277 --> 00:21:54,336
When you finish that,
load your software
384
00:21:54,413 --> 00:21:57,314
making sure you have
a terminator in your fuzzy port.
385
00:21:57,382 --> 00:22:01,546
[Randy] Then you gotta program
your new computer before...
386
00:22:01,653 --> 00:22:03,484
- [conga music]
- [screeching]