1 00:00:01,354 --> 00:00:03,990 Oh! What a day! Huh, mark? 2 00:00:04,091 --> 00:00:05,758 [rock music plays on headphones] 3 00:00:05,859 --> 00:00:09,161 Mark. Mark! 4 00:00:12,099 --> 00:00:14,000 Mark, what are you listening to? 5 00:00:15,335 --> 00:00:17,703 "pus and boots"? 6 00:00:17,804 --> 00:00:20,973 With their new hit single, smell the hell. 7 00:00:22,042 --> 00:00:24,610 You gotta be kidding. Nice lyrics. 8 00:00:24,711 --> 00:00:27,646 "I hate you. You're garbage. 9 00:00:27,747 --> 00:00:30,883 I'm puking. You're garbage." 10 00:00:30,984 --> 00:00:34,353 Which reminds me, you forgot to take out the garbage. 11 00:00:35,922 --> 00:00:37,390 - Hey, everybody. - [tim] hi. 12 00:00:37,491 --> 00:00:40,059 Hi, guys. Look at this. 13 00:00:40,160 --> 00:00:43,562 Brad got a letter from the university of north carolina. 14 00:00:43,663 --> 00:00:47,867 Here's an uplifting tune: I feel the fungus. 15 00:00:49,803 --> 00:00:52,004 It's from north carolina. 16 00:00:54,908 --> 00:00:57,877 This is that scout that was at practice the other day. 17 00:00:57,978 --> 00:01:00,245 He says he's looking at me for a soccer scholarship. 18 00:01:00,346 --> 00:01:04,183 University of north carolina? That's not in michigan. 19 00:01:07,454 --> 00:01:10,122 I have a chance at playing for the tar heels. Awesome! 20 00:01:10,223 --> 00:01:12,157 - Awesome. All right! - Yeah. 21 00:01:12,259 --> 00:01:14,193 This is great! 22 00:01:14,294 --> 00:01:16,728 Now remember though, you have two more years of school. 23 00:01:16,829 --> 00:01:18,530 Keep that grade-point average up. 24 00:01:18,631 --> 00:01:19,898 That's right. 25 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:22,534 Like when those technical schools were romancing me, 26 00:01:22,635 --> 00:01:24,904 I didn't want to let my grades go down. 27 00:01:26,973 --> 00:01:28,874 They couldn't go down. 28 00:01:30,744 --> 00:01:34,347 I'm gonna work harder than ever. I've got something to shoot for. 29 00:01:34,448 --> 00:01:36,882 - Congratulations. - I'm gonna call jason. 30 00:01:36,983 --> 00:01:39,752 A scholarship. Do you know what that would mean? 31 00:01:39,853 --> 00:01:41,787 He's gonna get a great education. 32 00:01:41,888 --> 00:01:44,289 Oh, yeah! 33 00:01:44,390 --> 00:01:49,495 But with the money we'd save, I could start another hot rod. 34 00:01:49,596 --> 00:01:52,164 Tim, if brad is lucky enough to get a scholarship, 35 00:01:52,265 --> 00:01:53,833 We're not gonna be buying any cars. 36 00:01:53,934 --> 00:01:55,768 We have two more kids times four more 37 00:01:55,869 --> 00:01:57,803 Years of college. You do the math. 38 00:01:58,104 --> 00:02:00,539 I married you so I wouldn't have to do the math. 39 00:02:50,724 --> 00:02:52,925 [phone rings] 40 00:02:55,028 --> 00:02:59,131 Hello? [whispers] it's cathy and greg. 41 00:02:59,232 --> 00:03:01,033 Oh, no. No. 42 00:03:01,134 --> 00:03:03,068 Hi. 43 00:03:03,170 --> 00:03:06,739 Uh... Oh, you want to get together next Friday? 44 00:03:06,939 --> 00:03:10,543 - [whispers] no, no, no. - No, we can't. We're busy. 45 00:03:11,311 --> 00:03:13,679 What are we busy doing? 46 00:03:13,479 --> 00:03:16,015 We're, uh, sawing wood. 47 00:03:18,251 --> 00:03:20,152 Dinner, randy. Dinner. 48 00:03:20,253 --> 00:03:22,021 We're sawing wood for dinner. 49 00:03:22,122 --> 00:03:26,325 [laughs] you see, we make a table, then we eat off it. Yeah. 50 00:03:26,426 --> 00:03:28,861 No, no, no. We'll let you know when we're free. 51 00:03:28,962 --> 00:03:30,896 Ok. Bye-bye. 52 00:03:30,997 --> 00:03:33,599 - [exhales heavily] that was close. - Yeah. 53 00:03:33,700 --> 00:03:36,301 [laughs] why are you trying to avoid these people? 54 00:03:36,402 --> 00:03:39,170 Cathy simms and greg clark, the most annoying kids at school. 55 00:03:39,272 --> 00:03:40,773 They're like a married couple. 56 00:03:40,874 --> 00:03:42,608 Since they heard we were together, 57 00:03:42,709 --> 00:03:44,610 They've been bugging us to double-date. 58 00:03:44,711 --> 00:03:46,512 I think they smell our fear. 59 00:03:49,783 --> 00:03:52,484 Randy, it's not really nice to duck people. 60 00:03:52,586 --> 00:03:53,752 Oh, well, you'd know, 61 00:03:53,853 --> 00:03:57,756 Being one of the all-time great couple-duckers. 62 00:03:57,857 --> 00:04:01,227 - Me? I am not a couple-ducker. - Oh, come on, mom! 63 00:04:01,328 --> 00:04:03,829 The goodmans? For a month we couldn't turn on our lights 64 00:04:03,930 --> 00:04:06,565 So they wouldn't know we were back from vacation. 65 00:04:06,666 --> 00:04:09,167 We don't know what to do. We're desperate. 66 00:04:09,268 --> 00:04:11,770 Now, I don't really condone this. 67 00:04:11,871 --> 00:04:14,839 But if you have to avoid somebody, here's what you do. 68 00:04:14,941 --> 00:04:17,042 Whenever they want to get together, 69 00:04:17,143 --> 00:04:19,878 Be agreeable but vague. 70 00:04:20,046 --> 00:04:22,381 Use phrases like, uh, "after the holidays" 71 00:04:22,482 --> 00:04:24,517 Or "when things settle down." 72 00:04:24,618 --> 00:04:26,552 Oh, if you run into them unexpectedly, 73 00:04:26,653 --> 00:04:29,555 Be sure that you have some emergency you have to deal with. 74 00:04:29,656 --> 00:04:32,725 This family, you don't even have to make that up. 75 00:04:33,860 --> 00:04:35,093 - Thanks. - [jill] welcome. 76 00:04:35,195 --> 00:04:37,363 - You ready to go to the mall? - Sure. 77 00:04:37,464 --> 00:04:38,497 When are you guys back? 78 00:04:38,598 --> 00:04:41,333 Oh, you know, when things settle down. 79 00:04:43,870 --> 00:04:46,138 [indistinct chatter] 80 00:04:46,239 --> 00:04:48,607 Honey, you should've seen brad at soccer practice. 81 00:04:48,708 --> 00:04:49,875 He was incredible! 82 00:04:49,976 --> 00:04:51,743 - I was the bomb! - No, you were the man! 83 00:04:51,844 --> 00:04:54,646 - I'm the man! Ooh! - Hey! Ow! 84 00:04:54,747 --> 00:04:56,248 [jill laughs] 85 00:04:56,349 --> 00:04:58,550 Chest bumping. 86 00:04:58,651 --> 00:05:01,520 Something you'd never see two women do. 87 00:05:03,289 --> 00:05:05,891 I'd pay a lot of money to see it though. 88 00:05:08,695 --> 00:05:11,196 Yeah. Coach martino seemed pretty excited 89 00:05:11,297 --> 00:05:13,866 - About that letter. - We're all excited about it. 90 00:05:13,967 --> 00:05:16,469 But remember what he said. They send out 300 letters, 91 00:05:16,570 --> 00:05:18,604 But only five kids get the scholarships. 92 00:05:18,705 --> 00:05:21,507 How do I make sure I'm one of those five? 93 00:05:21,608 --> 00:05:24,543 Come on. You gotta work harder than the other 295. 94 00:05:24,644 --> 00:05:26,811 Pay attention to your trainer. 95 00:05:26,912 --> 00:05:29,314 I don't have a personal trainer. 96 00:05:29,415 --> 00:05:31,983 You do now. Drop and give me 20. 97 00:05:33,719 --> 00:05:35,988 Blow it out! Seventeen! Come on! Eighteen! 98 00:05:36,089 --> 00:05:39,591 Push it! Nineteen! Good! Twenty. Lock it up. 99 00:05:39,692 --> 00:05:41,961 Put another plate on. One more set! Come on! 100 00:05:42,062 --> 00:05:43,462 Dad, another set? I'm kind of tired. 101 00:05:43,563 --> 00:05:45,397 Tired? Look, we've got a goal. 102 00:05:45,398 --> 00:05:47,966 We've gotta do everything we can. What do we want? 103 00:05:48,067 --> 00:05:50,502 - [panting] scholarship. - How are we gonna get it? 104 00:05:50,603 --> 00:05:52,404 - Hard work. - I can't hear you! 105 00:05:52,506 --> 00:05:53,672 - Hard work! - Can't hear! 106 00:05:53,773 --> 00:05:55,574 - Hard work! - I can't hear you! 107 00:05:55,675 --> 00:05:57,510 I heard you! 108 00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:02,080 Does everybody know what time it is? 109 00:06:02,181 --> 00:06:05,117 - [crowd] tool time! - That's right! 110 00:06:05,218 --> 00:06:11,023 Binford tools is proud to present tim "the tool man" taylor! Whoo! 111 00:06:11,123 --> 00:06:14,125 - [theme song plays] - [cheering] 112 00:06:17,363 --> 00:06:19,031 Thank you. 113 00:06:19,131 --> 00:06:22,100 Thank you, everybody. Thanks for coming. Thank you, heidi. 114 00:06:22,201 --> 00:06:25,236 Thank you, heidi. Thank you, heidi! 115 00:06:29,876 --> 00:06:33,845 [sighs] welcome to tool time. I am tim "the tool man" taylor. 116 00:06:33,947 --> 00:06:36,414 And of course you all know my assistant, al borland. 117 00:06:36,515 --> 00:06:40,185 [applause, cheering] 118 00:06:40,286 --> 00:06:43,789 Well, today al and I join you for our tool time salute... 119 00:06:43,890 --> 00:06:45,223 [man] oi! My back! 120 00:06:45,324 --> 00:06:46,524 ...To fitness. 121 00:06:48,227 --> 00:06:49,527 And who better to help us out 122 00:06:49,629 --> 00:06:51,997 Than those lean, mean construction machines 123 00:06:52,098 --> 00:06:54,900 From bay city? The boys from k&b construction! Bring 'em out! 124 00:06:55,001 --> 00:06:57,335 Let's hear it for rock, pete and dwayne! 125 00:06:57,436 --> 00:06:59,805 - [applause] - hey! Hey, buddy! 126 00:06:59,906 --> 00:07:01,907 - All right! - How are you, buddy? 127 00:07:02,008 --> 00:07:03,976 All right. 128 00:07:04,844 --> 00:07:05,978 It's good to see you. 129 00:07:06,079 --> 00:07:07,512 Always great to be here, timmy. 130 00:07:07,614 --> 00:07:10,215 All right. What do you guys do to stay in shape? 131 00:07:10,316 --> 00:07:14,686 Well, not as much as you might think, tim. 132 00:07:14,787 --> 00:07:19,225 Pete's idea of a workout is the old one-armed doughnut curl. 133 00:07:20,994 --> 00:07:23,028 Is, um, fitness a big deal at k&b construction? 134 00:07:23,129 --> 00:07:24,663 Ah, it's job one, timmy. 135 00:07:24,764 --> 00:07:27,599 According to researchers at k&b r and d, 136 00:07:27,700 --> 00:07:31,136 Being in shape can help prevent injuries at the workplace. 137 00:07:31,237 --> 00:07:35,073 The only way I can prevent injuries in our workplace is if tim calls in sick. 138 00:07:35,174 --> 00:07:38,777 - [laughter] - that's a good one, al! 139 00:07:38,878 --> 00:07:44,216 You know, tim, studies have shown that hammering or any repetitive movement 140 00:07:44,317 --> 00:07:48,120 With the hand can cause carpal tunnel syndrome. 141 00:07:48,221 --> 00:07:49,255 To prevent this, 142 00:07:49,356 --> 00:07:51,723 My exercise program goes something like this. 143 00:07:51,824 --> 00:07:54,626 - [deep breathing] - [watch beeps] 144 00:07:57,597 --> 00:07:59,564 Be sure to consult a physician 145 00:07:59,665 --> 00:08:03,668 Before starting a strenuous exercise program. 146 00:08:03,937 --> 00:08:06,872 Rock, what do you do to stay in shape? 147 00:08:07,106 --> 00:08:09,975 Well, during lunch breaks, I teach jazzercise. 148 00:08:10,076 --> 00:08:12,444 [laughter] 149 00:08:15,214 --> 00:08:17,983 That doesn't sound too manly, rock. 150 00:08:18,084 --> 00:08:21,987 We do it 80 stories up on a steel girder. 151 00:08:22,088 --> 00:08:25,457 Well, that'll put wind in your leotard. 152 00:08:25,558 --> 00:08:28,293 Speaking of leotards, it's time to introduce our guest, 153 00:08:28,394 --> 00:08:30,662 A professional bodybuilder. 154 00:08:30,763 --> 00:08:33,298 Not just a professional, a three-time world champion. 155 00:08:33,399 --> 00:08:35,300 Here at cobo hall at the fitness show. 156 00:08:35,401 --> 00:08:38,369 Heidi, my bodybuilder, please. Miss cory everson! 157 00:08:38,470 --> 00:08:43,942 [cheering] 158 00:08:44,044 --> 00:08:45,978 Ah, it's very good to have you on the show. 159 00:08:46,079 --> 00:08:47,846 - Thank you. - Cory's here to show us how 160 00:08:47,947 --> 00:08:49,782 To prevent injuries at work. 161 00:08:49,883 --> 00:08:51,383 Yes. One of the leading injuries 162 00:08:51,484 --> 00:08:53,385 In the workplace is injury to the low back, 163 00:08:53,486 --> 00:08:55,520 Because you're using improper mechanics. 164 00:08:55,621 --> 00:08:56,822 Proper body mechanics. 165 00:08:56,923 --> 00:08:58,824 Use your legs to lift, not your back. 166 00:08:58,925 --> 00:09:01,459 And never rotate and torque your spine. 167 00:09:01,561 --> 00:09:04,129 That's what happened. 168 00:09:05,431 --> 00:09:07,299 There's some men that probably don't think 169 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:09,368 Women can lift the iron with the men. 170 00:09:09,269 --> 00:09:10,469 I'm not one of them. 171 00:09:10,570 --> 00:09:12,338 But just for the sake of argument, 172 00:09:12,439 --> 00:09:14,072 Do you want to go mano to womano? 173 00:09:14,173 --> 00:09:16,375 - [al laughs] - you want to compete against me? 174 00:09:16,543 --> 00:09:21,079 - Yeah. - You do know I'm a professional? 175 00:09:21,180 --> 00:09:22,280 I could've gone pro. 176 00:09:22,381 --> 00:09:25,851 I wanted to keep my eligibility open for the olympics. 177 00:09:26,352 --> 00:09:27,619 What event was that? 178 00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:30,155 Synchronized gluing a board to your head? 179 00:09:30,256 --> 00:09:33,892 - [all laugh] - I remember that! Yeah! 180 00:09:35,795 --> 00:09:37,862 Do you guys wonder why it's been three years 181 00:09:37,963 --> 00:09:40,232 Since I've had you on the show? 182 00:09:40,333 --> 00:09:42,668 - Let's get to it. - Tim, she looks pretty strong. 183 00:09:42,769 --> 00:09:45,003 I think she could bench press us. 184 00:09:45,104 --> 00:09:48,240 And, by the way, anytime. 185 00:09:48,341 --> 00:09:51,776 Ok, let's try a nice light weight. Let's say 130 pounds. 186 00:09:51,877 --> 00:09:55,214 - Ok, looks good to me. - Use your legs. [clears throat] 187 00:09:55,315 --> 00:09:57,216 Come on, timbo. 188 00:09:57,317 --> 00:10:01,419 Oh! [panting] 189 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:04,723 - [rock] yeah! - [pete] all right, timmy! 190 00:10:09,462 --> 00:10:11,497 Your turn, cory. 191 00:10:21,474 --> 00:10:24,208 [electric fizzling] 192 00:10:29,215 --> 00:10:32,251 - What was that? - What was what? 193 00:10:38,190 --> 00:10:39,324 [gasps] 194 00:10:39,425 --> 00:10:41,326 Maybe you're not as strong as you thought. 195 00:10:41,494 --> 00:10:45,030 Just hold on a second. I just need a better grip. 196 00:10:46,432 --> 00:10:47,966 [exhales] 197 00:10:52,771 --> 00:10:56,408 Maybe you need the help of a big strong man? 198 00:11:00,112 --> 00:11:02,347 [electric fizzling] 199 00:11:09,422 --> 00:11:12,925 [tim] go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Yeah! 200 00:11:13,026 --> 00:11:14,993 You shaved two seconds off your last try. 201 00:11:15,095 --> 00:11:16,929 Now some ball-handling. All right? 202 00:11:17,030 --> 00:11:19,531 Use your eyes. Use your eyes. Come on. 203 00:11:19,632 --> 00:11:22,901 - Yeah, yeah! - Brad, it's Friday night. 204 00:11:23,002 --> 00:11:25,136 Wouldn't you rather be out having fun? 205 00:11:25,237 --> 00:11:26,838 No, mom. Can't have fun. 206 00:11:26,939 --> 00:11:28,373 Dad says I need work on my ball control. 207 00:11:28,474 --> 00:11:31,042 I'm gonna keep doing it so I can score more goals. 208 00:11:31,143 --> 00:11:33,845 This kid's gonna be a superstar, right, honey? 209 00:11:33,946 --> 00:11:37,582 - I guess so. - I can't hear you! 210 00:11:37,684 --> 00:11:39,884 Tim, come inside. I want to talk to you for a minute. 211 00:11:39,985 --> 00:11:43,054 - Don't slow down. I'll be right back. - All right. 212 00:11:44,790 --> 00:11:47,125 Don't you think you're being a little hard on him? 213 00:11:47,226 --> 00:11:50,095 He loves this stuff. Keep your knees up! 214 00:11:50,196 --> 00:11:52,864 Soccer has been fun. I don't want you working him to death 215 00:11:52,965 --> 00:11:54,432 And turning it into a chore. 216 00:11:54,701 --> 00:11:57,536 This is the difference between you and me. 217 00:11:57,637 --> 00:11:59,604 You look at the glass, you say it's half empty. 218 00:11:59,706 --> 00:12:01,640 I look at the glass and I say... 219 00:12:05,545 --> 00:12:07,212 ...It's broken. 220 00:12:10,149 --> 00:12:11,516 Hi, sweetie. 221 00:12:11,617 --> 00:12:14,485 Mom, can you open this can? My nails are still wet. 222 00:12:17,423 --> 00:12:20,192 Why did you paint your nails black? 223 00:12:20,293 --> 00:12:22,360 Why did you paint yours pink? 224 00:12:24,030 --> 00:12:26,465 Oh, ok. Ok. 225 00:12:26,566 --> 00:12:29,601 I get it. I get it. You're trying to express yourself. 226 00:12:29,702 --> 00:12:32,837 It's just part of growing up. I think it's really cool. 227 00:12:32,938 --> 00:12:36,408 Yeah, in fact, you know what? I think they look great. 228 00:12:40,446 --> 00:12:42,847 God help me! 229 00:12:45,685 --> 00:12:48,086 - Hi, guys. How's it going? - Hey, mrs. Taylor. 230 00:12:48,187 --> 00:12:49,587 Hey. Terrible. 231 00:12:49,689 --> 00:12:52,524 The couple we've been avoiding cornered us after school. 232 00:12:52,625 --> 00:12:55,193 Yeah. We got a double-date with cathy and greg tonight. 233 00:12:55,361 --> 00:12:57,663 What happened to the excuses I gave you? 234 00:12:57,764 --> 00:12:58,830 Shot down one by one. 235 00:12:58,931 --> 00:13:02,066 I should've asked dad how he ducks people. 236 00:13:02,302 --> 00:13:03,835 He doesn't have to worry about it. 237 00:13:03,936 --> 00:13:06,071 He's the one people are ducking. 238 00:13:07,373 --> 00:13:09,775 [sighs] sorry I'm late. Got hung up at work. 239 00:13:09,876 --> 00:13:12,010 We can catch the second half of the game. 240 00:13:12,111 --> 00:13:14,613 - Ok, I'm ready. - Look what I had made. 241 00:13:14,714 --> 00:13:18,082 - [laughs] "goal brad goal." - hey. 242 00:13:18,183 --> 00:13:20,084 If your kid's a winner, you gotta flaunt it. 243 00:13:20,185 --> 00:13:21,453 Right. 244 00:13:23,522 --> 00:13:26,891 - What are you doing home? - Coach kicked me off the team. 245 00:13:30,963 --> 00:13:33,164 Why did the coach kick you off the team? 246 00:13:33,265 --> 00:13:35,233 I told him off when he benched me. 247 00:13:35,334 --> 00:13:36,368 Why did he bench you? 248 00:13:36,469 --> 00:13:39,371 More importantly, who are you to tell your coach off? 249 00:13:39,472 --> 00:13:42,106 Mom, we were up six to nothing thanks to me. 250 00:13:42,208 --> 00:13:43,475 Then our coach gets this idea 251 00:13:43,576 --> 00:13:45,443 He should put in the crappy players. 252 00:13:45,544 --> 00:13:47,345 The crappy players? 253 00:13:47,446 --> 00:13:49,747 I'm just trying to build up my stats. 254 00:13:49,849 --> 00:13:51,983 I had three goals and it wasn't half-time. 255 00:13:52,084 --> 00:13:56,855 I don't care if you had three... Three goals at half-time? 256 00:13:56,956 --> 00:13:58,556 I don't care if you had 600 goals. 257 00:13:58,657 --> 00:14:00,325 The coach runs the team, brad. 258 00:14:00,426 --> 00:14:02,627 The coach wouldn't have a team without me. 259 00:14:02,728 --> 00:14:03,962 Me, me, me, me, me! 260 00:14:04,063 --> 00:14:06,398 When did you become the center of your own universe? 261 00:14:06,498 --> 00:14:09,167 Why don't you ask your shirt? 262 00:14:12,838 --> 00:14:16,007 Shirts don't talk. 263 00:14:16,108 --> 00:14:17,876 Dad, we've worked so hard for this. 264 00:14:17,977 --> 00:14:20,245 You gotta talk some sense into my coach. 265 00:14:20,346 --> 00:14:21,813 No way your father's going in to talk. 266 00:14:21,914 --> 00:14:23,748 - I'll talk to his coach. - Thank you. 267 00:14:23,850 --> 00:14:25,350 I'll tell him my kid was wrong. 268 00:14:25,451 --> 00:14:27,452 He deserves to be kicked off the team. 269 00:14:27,553 --> 00:14:30,422 - Now you're bailing. - No. Don't start this. 270 00:14:30,556 --> 00:14:31,757 - I see how it is. - Hold on. 271 00:14:31,858 --> 00:14:33,792 I thought we were in this together. 272 00:14:33,893 --> 00:14:35,427 You know what? I was wrong. 273 00:14:37,663 --> 00:14:39,030 What is with him? 274 00:14:39,131 --> 00:14:42,100 Where did he get the idea I'd approve of him disobeying coach? 275 00:14:42,201 --> 00:14:43,468 I don't know. 276 00:14:43,569 --> 00:14:46,304 Maybe it had something to do with "brad, you're awesome." 277 00:14:46,405 --> 00:14:50,142 "brad, you're the bomb." "I can't hear you!" 278 00:14:52,712 --> 00:14:55,180 Oh! You're blaming this on me? 279 00:14:55,281 --> 00:14:56,447 I'm not just blaming you. 280 00:14:56,548 --> 00:14:58,216 I blame every man who thinks sports 281 00:14:58,317 --> 00:14:59,917 Are the only thing that matters. 282 00:15:00,018 --> 00:15:02,620 I blame the press for writing about winners. 283 00:15:02,722 --> 00:15:05,857 The networks for making every game seem like life and death. 284 00:15:05,958 --> 00:15:07,392 I blame the advertisers 285 00:15:07,493 --> 00:15:10,662 Who only care about selling beer and $200 sneakers. 286 00:15:12,331 --> 00:15:14,899 You're a rather angry woman, aren't you? 287 00:15:17,002 --> 00:15:22,107 Seventeen, 18, 19... 288 00:15:23,942 --> 00:15:27,312 - Easy there, neighbor. - [grunts] 289 00:15:27,413 --> 00:15:29,314 You might end up herniating your 290 00:15:29,415 --> 00:15:31,949 Nucleus pulposus and end up with articulopathy. 291 00:15:33,352 --> 00:15:35,987 - What? - A pain in your butt. 292 00:15:36,088 --> 00:15:38,823 [groans] is your yoga class over, wilson? 293 00:15:38,924 --> 00:15:41,859 Yeah. Thought I might continue on with weight training. 294 00:15:41,961 --> 00:15:44,629 You know, firm and toned. 295 00:15:44,730 --> 00:15:46,831 Why don't you try covered and hidden? Yah! 296 00:15:46,932 --> 00:15:51,569 [wilson laughs] so where's brad? I thought you were training him. 297 00:15:51,670 --> 00:15:54,005 I was. He got kicked off the soccer team 298 00:15:54,106 --> 00:15:55,840 For mouthing off at the coach. 299 00:15:55,941 --> 00:15:58,976 I wonder if I'm putting too much pressure on him. 300 00:15:59,077 --> 00:16:01,746 Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Mm-hm. Mm-hm. 301 00:16:01,847 --> 00:16:03,181 You know, tim, my father and I 302 00:16:03,282 --> 00:16:05,283 Went through the same thing together. 303 00:16:05,384 --> 00:16:07,051 You played soccer? 304 00:16:07,152 --> 00:16:10,755 No, no, no, no, no, no. Bagpipes. 305 00:16:10,856 --> 00:16:12,424 You know, I was quite a prodigy, 306 00:16:12,525 --> 00:16:16,228 But my father used to pressure me to practice five hours a day. 307 00:16:16,329 --> 00:16:19,431 And that pressure brought on one of the darkest days of my life. 308 00:16:19,532 --> 00:16:23,335 Tim, at the saint patrick's day parade, I showboated. 309 00:16:23,436 --> 00:16:24,602 Without shame, 310 00:16:24,704 --> 00:16:28,005 I drowned out the entire all-city leprechaun choir. 311 00:16:31,310 --> 00:16:34,579 - That reminds me of the time... - Tim, we're talking about me. 312 00:16:35,714 --> 00:16:37,015 Sorry. 313 00:16:37,116 --> 00:16:38,983 My father realized that his badgering 314 00:16:39,085 --> 00:16:41,086 Was partly the cause of my behavior. 315 00:16:41,187 --> 00:16:44,756 - What did he do about it? - Well, he lightened up. 316 00:16:44,857 --> 00:16:46,224 Said, "do your best. 317 00:16:46,325 --> 00:16:48,860 If you're not the greatest bagpipe player in the world, 318 00:16:48,961 --> 00:16:53,197 It's ok." oh, tim, I felt so much better. I sat right down. 319 00:16:53,298 --> 00:16:56,667 I wrote a letter of apology to each and every leprechaun. 320 00:16:56,768 --> 00:17:01,439 Wow. Did you have to write really, really tiny? 321 00:17:01,541 --> 00:17:03,842 No, tim. I didn't. 322 00:17:05,978 --> 00:17:08,312 [tires screeching, sirens wailing] 323 00:17:08,413 --> 00:17:11,950 [man] up against the wall, punk. And spread 'em! 324 00:17:13,953 --> 00:17:16,254 Very funny, dad. 325 00:17:16,355 --> 00:17:19,290 Turn that thing off for a minute. I want to talk to you. 326 00:17:19,391 --> 00:17:22,060 - There's nothing to talk about. - Yeah, there is. 327 00:17:22,161 --> 00:17:24,796 I want to talk about teamwork. 328 00:17:24,897 --> 00:17:27,132 Um, you know barry sanders, 329 00:17:27,232 --> 00:17:29,100 One of the greatest running backs alive. 330 00:17:29,201 --> 00:17:31,269 Not much without his offensive line. 331 00:17:31,370 --> 00:17:34,605 Michael andretti, great driver. Not much without his pit crew. 332 00:17:34,707 --> 00:17:39,377 Michael jordan... Bad example. Um... 333 00:17:39,478 --> 00:17:40,745 I know what you're trying to say. 334 00:17:40,846 --> 00:17:42,747 It's too late. I'm off the team. 335 00:17:42,848 --> 00:17:43,949 Listen for a minute. 336 00:17:44,050 --> 00:17:46,318 The reason I wanted the scholarship so bad for you 337 00:17:46,418 --> 00:17:49,221 Is because you have great athletic ability. 338 00:17:49,322 --> 00:17:52,023 You know, I never played sports when I was your age. 339 00:17:52,124 --> 00:17:55,860 [laughs] yeah, I know. Grandma says you stunk. 340 00:17:55,961 --> 00:17:58,897 It wasn't because I stunk. I wasn't interested in sports. 341 00:17:59,164 --> 00:18:01,399 Said you couldn't catch a ball to save your life. 342 00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:03,635 - It wasn't because... - Two left feet. 343 00:18:03,736 --> 00:18:05,837 Let me tell you something about grandma. 344 00:18:05,938 --> 00:18:07,171 Grandma, great! 345 00:18:07,273 --> 00:18:09,608 What a role model! Threw like a girl all the time! 346 00:18:09,709 --> 00:18:12,744 And oh, oh, oh! It was always passed-down clothes for me! 347 00:18:12,845 --> 00:18:15,380 You try playing football in tap shoes! Try that! 348 00:18:15,481 --> 00:18:17,148 Dad! Dad! 349 00:18:17,250 --> 00:18:19,117 - Let's forget about grandma! - Yeah. 350 00:18:19,218 --> 00:18:21,419 Her cube steak and stewed tomato dinner... 351 00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:25,490 Going out to football games I couldn't even think, I had so much gas! 352 00:18:26,392 --> 00:18:28,393 Ok. Ok. 353 00:18:32,932 --> 00:18:34,532 The reason I wanted you to do this 354 00:18:34,633 --> 00:18:36,334 Is because you're good at soccer. 355 00:18:36,435 --> 00:18:38,503 I wanted you to realize your potential. 356 00:18:38,604 --> 00:18:41,172 - That's what I want. - But none of that will happen 357 00:18:41,273 --> 00:18:44,342 Unless you show good judgment and respect for other people. 358 00:18:44,443 --> 00:18:47,878 - So I guess I blew it. - No. We both blew it. 359 00:18:47,980 --> 00:18:49,747 I got too excited about this scholarship 360 00:18:49,848 --> 00:18:52,683 And I put too much pressure on you. 361 00:18:53,385 --> 00:18:55,320 - So what do we do now? - What do we do now? 362 00:18:55,421 --> 00:18:56,787 I say we talk to your coach. 363 00:18:57,023 --> 00:18:59,758 What if he doesn't take me back? 364 00:18:59,859 --> 00:19:01,559 I think he will. You gotta apologize. 365 00:19:01,660 --> 00:19:03,561 I do a little explaining. Huh? 366 00:19:03,662 --> 00:19:05,830 [sighs] thanks, dad. 367 00:19:05,931 --> 00:19:07,765 You bet. If it doesn't work out, 368 00:19:07,866 --> 00:19:11,402 I know a guy that can set you up with a bagpipe scholarship. 369 00:19:15,707 --> 00:19:17,676 It's just really great that you guys 370 00:19:17,776 --> 00:19:19,444 Finally found the time to get together 371 00:19:19,545 --> 00:19:23,415 - With greg and me. - You're not an easy couple to pin down. 372 00:19:23,516 --> 00:19:27,885 [laughs] and yet you managed to catch us. 373 00:19:29,221 --> 00:19:30,722 So how's your double-date going? 374 00:19:30,823 --> 00:19:32,623 Remember how I told you cathy and greg 375 00:19:32,725 --> 00:19:34,458 Were the most annoying people in school? 376 00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:38,296 - Uh-huh. - They're the most annoying on earth. 377 00:19:38,397 --> 00:19:41,132 Cathy and I can't wait to go bowling with you guys. 378 00:19:41,233 --> 00:19:42,433 I have a 180 average. 379 00:19:42,534 --> 00:19:46,003 - Oh, greg. You're so showy. - I'm not showy. 380 00:19:46,104 --> 00:19:47,739 She always brings this up. 381 00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:49,173 - I do not. - Please! 382 00:19:49,274 --> 00:19:51,876 Last Thursday night with dan and irene? What was that? 383 00:19:51,977 --> 00:19:53,678 You know what? Don't start with me. 384 00:19:53,779 --> 00:19:56,113 - You started with me. - This is a nightmare. 385 00:19:56,215 --> 00:19:58,616 [sighs] well, look at the bright side. 386 00:19:58,718 --> 00:20:01,986 The bowling alley closes in five-and-a-half hours. 387 00:20:02,087 --> 00:20:06,091 - Let's go bowling! - This is it. We're sunk. 388 00:20:06,192 --> 00:20:09,326 So I'm ready to go bowling. How about you guys? 389 00:20:09,427 --> 00:20:10,461 You're coming with us? 390 00:20:10,562 --> 00:20:12,596 Oh, I always go on all of randy's dates. 391 00:20:12,698 --> 00:20:14,565 A boy needs his mother. 392 00:20:17,335 --> 00:20:20,971 - That's right. - Lauren, you're ok with this? 393 00:20:21,072 --> 00:20:24,342 Yeah, I think it's great. [laughs] 394 00:20:24,443 --> 00:20:26,244 You know, on really special occasions, 395 00:20:26,345 --> 00:20:28,379 His grandmother comes too. 396 00:20:29,749 --> 00:20:32,416 Just me and my women. 397 00:20:33,485 --> 00:20:35,553 - I realized I can't go bowling. - You can't? 398 00:20:35,655 --> 00:20:38,689 - I forgot my shoe inserts. - Oh! 399 00:20:38,791 --> 00:20:40,958 - We should do this another time. - Yeah. 400 00:20:41,060 --> 00:20:42,626 Sometime after the holidays. 401 00:20:42,728 --> 00:20:45,163 - When things settle down. - I'll call you. 402 00:20:45,263 --> 00:20:46,363 - Ok. - Ok. 403 00:20:46,464 --> 00:20:48,833 - Bye-bye. - [jill] it was nice to meet you. 404 00:20:50,402 --> 00:20:51,468 [randy sighs] 405 00:20:51,570 --> 00:20:53,304 I don't think you'll have to worry about 406 00:20:53,405 --> 00:20:55,272 Ducking cathy and greg anymore. 407 00:20:55,373 --> 00:20:56,708 Thank you, mrs. Taylor. 408 00:20:56,809 --> 00:20:59,343 You know, you are so much cooler than my parents. 409 00:20:59,444 --> 00:21:00,511 - I am? - Yeah. 410 00:21:00,612 --> 00:21:02,814 They have this thing about lying. 411 00:21:02,915 --> 00:21:05,082 They think it's wrong. [laughs] 412 00:21:08,954 --> 00:21:11,823 That's why I love my mom. 413 00:21:14,794 --> 00:21:17,595 - [the battle of new orleans plays] - three, four! 414 00:21:17,697 --> 00:21:20,231 One, two, three, four! 415 00:21:20,332 --> 00:21:22,867 One, two, three, four! 416 00:21:22,968 --> 00:21:25,169 Hammer, hammer, hammer, hammer! 417 00:21:25,270 --> 00:21:27,605 And a jack, jack, jack. Jack, jack, jack. 418 00:21:27,706 --> 00:21:30,374 Saw, saw, saw, saw! 419 00:21:30,475 --> 00:21:33,311 And one, two, three, four! 420 00:21:33,412 --> 00:21:35,813 One, two, three, four! 421 00:21:35,914 --> 00:21:38,316 Rivetdance! Huh! 422 00:21:38,417 --> 00:21:41,519 Lord of the rivets! Huh! 423 00:21:41,620 --> 00:21:44,189 And one and two and three and four and five and six and seven, eight! 424 00:21:44,290 --> 00:21:47,825 One and two and three and four and five and six and seven, huh! 425 00:21:47,926 --> 00:21:51,429 ♪ we stood beside our cotton bales and didn't say a thing ♪ 426 00:21:51,530 --> 00:21:54,732 [applause] 427 00:21:58,803 --> 00:22:00,371 Whoo!