1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162
WWW.MY-SUBS.CO

1
00:00:24,020 --> 00:00:27,052
Calling all frequencies.
Calling all frequencies.

2
00:00:27,068 --> 00:00:31,048
Come to Britain, home
of Stonehenge and the Ben Nevis

3
00:00:31,068 --> 00:00:36,076
escalator. Come to Britain. Britain,
now once again including Wales.

4
00:00:37,072 --> 00:00:40,024
Stop and pick up a digi-leaflet.

5
00:00:40,036 --> 00:00:43,020
Or not. Oh, come to Britain!

6
00:00:43,084 --> 00:00:46,036
See an actual cow.

7
00:00:46,052 --> 00:00:50,016
Drive on a real British A-road.
Um...

8
00:00:50,028 --> 00:00:52,044
All right?

9
00:00:52,060 --> 00:00:55,000
Oi! Look lively,
cos we have got a new mission!

10
00:00:55,016 --> 00:00:57,064
We are in...the Green Javelins. Ooh!

11
00:00:57,080 --> 00:01:01,080
That is both amazing and wonderful.
And what are the Green Javelins?

12
00:01:04,024 --> 00:01:08,080
The pride of Britain!
The best space-o-batics team
in the known universe!

13
00:01:08,096 --> 00:01:11,084
'..Forefront
of space-o-batic displays.'

14
00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:15,052
Bit of a boy's thing, but well
done you! How'd we get that then?

15
00:01:15,068 --> 00:01:18,008
Well, sadly they...

16
00:01:18,020 --> 00:01:20,084
lost a ship with all hands.

17
00:01:21,052 --> 00:01:24,040
A terrible waste of
precious human life.

18
00:01:24,056 --> 00:01:28,016
And so we will get their
Green Javelins neck scarves!

19
00:01:28,028 --> 00:01:29,076
Yeah!

20
00:01:38,064 --> 00:01:44,088
Hey, hey, York!
Hey, York, we're gonna get ourselves
in the bloomin' Green Javelins.

21
00:01:45,008 --> 00:01:48,020
How about some responsible
enjoyment of alcohol, York?

22
00:01:49,068 --> 00:01:53,024
How about you and me go out
and get totally responsibled, huh?

23
00:01:53,036 --> 00:01:54,096
York!

24
00:01:55,008 --> 00:01:57,012
Ooh, hello, Commander!

25
00:01:57,024 --> 00:01:59,076
Yes, I was just... Back!

26
00:01:59,088 --> 00:02:01,060
Hm.

27
00:02:01,076 --> 00:02:04,048
Is it another monkey's
head on a kettle?

28
00:02:05,072 --> 00:02:08,080
Ooh, I take it you're
referring to the Intellikettle.

29
00:02:08,096 --> 00:02:10,064
Ah yes, an early triumph.

30
00:02:10,076 --> 00:02:12,092
I... Use the bucket!

31
00:02:13,012 --> 00:02:18,056
Look, listen. The Green Javelins,
Mr York, is a very important chance
for us and to think...

32
00:02:21,068 --> 00:02:24,076
Creation is God's work
alone, all right?

33
00:02:24,092 --> 00:02:28,004
Let me have a look.
Not now, Commander, I'm very busy.

34
00:02:28,020 --> 00:02:30,036
Now that's a table, not a biscuit!

35
00:02:35,072 --> 00:02:39,084
You better know what you're doing
cos if I drop this,
I'm gonna do it, you know.

36
00:02:40,004 --> 00:02:44,072
You drop the pipe on my knee,
workplace accident, big settlement
and I get my pub in Thames Gateway.

37
00:02:44,092 --> 00:02:49,016
Why can't you break your own leg?
I've tried, I can't.
Get on with it and if

38
00:02:49,032 --> 00:02:51,084
I say stop, don't listen.
Just carry on.

39
00:02:51,096 --> 00:02:54,024
All right.

40
00:02:54,036 --> 00:02:55,084
Three,

41
00:02:55,096 --> 00:02:56,088
two,

42
00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:57,092
one...

43
00:02:58,004 --> 00:03:01,016
No, no, no! Don't do it. Stop! OK.

44
00:03:01,028 --> 00:03:02,048
Yep.

45
00:03:02,064 --> 00:03:05,020
OK... Right.
No, what are you doing? No, Jeffers!

46
00:03:05,036 --> 00:03:07,028
No, no! It's gonna really hurt.

47
00:03:07,044 --> 00:03:11,032
It's gonna snap like a stick.
Three, two, one. NO!

48
00:03:14,024 --> 00:03:16,004
NO!

49
00:03:19,068 --> 00:03:21,048
Sorry.

50
00:03:23,004 --> 00:03:24,068
Pin's gone through my tongue.

51
00:03:24,084 --> 00:03:26,072
Do you want another go,
cos I'm up for it now?

52
00:03:26,088 --> 00:03:29,048
It's getting dark in here.

53
00:03:38,028 --> 00:03:41,012
Sounds so tight. How do you,
how do you get it so tight?

54
00:03:44,028 --> 00:03:49,096
Hey, look, we got the details.
Rendezvous point 602, report
to Squadron Leader Jeremy Mason.

55
00:03:50,012 --> 00:03:52,044
Um, stop it, Commander, turn it off.

56
00:03:52,056 --> 00:03:54,044
We can't go. Why not?

57
00:03:54,056 --> 00:03:56,004
I don't want to talk about it.

58
00:04:00,008 --> 00:04:05,024
I was 17. Jeremy was 18.
We met at a summer camp
for Young Agnostics. I see.

59
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:08,028
I thought he was arrogant.
He thought I was naive.

60
00:04:08,044 --> 00:04:11,020
And overbearing.
And bordering plain.

61
00:04:11,032 --> 00:04:13,060
Then something happened.

62
00:04:13,076 --> 00:04:15,084
I understand.
One night he took me to the dunes.

63
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:19,000
I see. He plucked my flower
from its delicate vase. Hmmm.

64
00:04:19,020 --> 00:04:23,016
And as his maleness... Then it
was... No, no... Yuck, yuck, yuck!

65
00:04:23,036 --> 00:04:25,060
Sorry, Commander. He broke my
heart and I can never see him again.

66
00:04:25,076 --> 00:04:28,056
And I know you won't make me.
Look, look.

67
00:04:32,032 --> 00:04:35,036
Means I'm not the Commander any more.
I see. I'm your friend. I'm Mike.

68
00:04:35,056 --> 00:04:39,036
No, I know what you're doing. Look
we had quite a tough time last year.

69
00:04:39,056 --> 00:04:42,020
When we went on the run
and we got caught after

70
00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:47,052
eight and a half minutes, and we're
only in Space Force now cos you
asked my Dad to have a word, yes?

71
00:04:49,024 --> 00:04:53,020
I'm now the Commander again, all
right? This is my big comeback gig.

72
00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:58,024
Look at me and I'm not letting
you blow it for me, so get
over him and that is an order.

73
00:04:58,040 --> 00:04:59,096
And, and take that to Sandstrom.

74
00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:02,004
That's another one. Go on.

75
00:05:02,016 --> 00:05:03,060
Clip clop off. Beast!

76
00:05:03,072 --> 00:05:05,012
Hey! Hey!

77
00:05:08,076 --> 00:05:13,052
Men will blind themselves with
soup spoons when they see you.

78
00:05:13,068 --> 00:05:17,088
Next to you,
perfection is a pock-marked harlot.

79
00:05:21,084 --> 00:05:26,012
Now, it's time to see if you are
ready to be me. Name?

80
00:05:26,064 --> 00:05:28,040
Eduardo York.

81
00:05:28,052 --> 00:05:30,052
Rank? First Officer.

82
00:05:30,064 --> 00:05:32,004
Duties?

83
00:05:32,016 --> 00:05:34,000
Half punched a snail.

84
00:05:35,012 --> 00:05:37,076
Never mind that now.

85
00:05:37,088 --> 00:05:40,088
You are ready. Go forth.

86
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:43,088
Join the crew. Blend in.

87
00:05:50,092 --> 00:05:53,008
Left, right.

88
00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:57,024
Left, left, left...

89
00:05:57,036 --> 00:05:58,064
Left...

90
00:06:01,004 --> 00:06:02,024
Right.

91
00:06:02,036 --> 00:06:04,036
Left. Right. Left.

92
00:06:04,048 --> 00:06:06,032
Right. More eggs.

93
00:06:06,044 --> 00:06:08,020
Left. Right...

94
00:06:16,064 --> 00:06:18,020
Say it again, Henderson.

95
00:06:18,032 --> 00:06:20,036
Say it so I know you understand.

96
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:26,096
I won't screw this up like
I've screwed up everything
else I've ever done. Good!

97
00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:30,008
You're not there to make
pretty shapes in the sky.

98
00:06:30,028 --> 00:06:34,032
You're there so I can sell British
ships. My neck is on the line.

99
00:06:34,048 --> 00:06:36,012
My arse is on the line.

100
00:06:37,048 --> 00:06:40,068
I'm actually twisted round so my
neck and my arse are both on the

101
00:06:40,084 --> 00:06:43,056
line at the same time, and
it hurts, Henderson.

102
00:06:43,072 --> 00:06:47,060
Look, Space Marshal, can
I just say in my defence... No.

103
00:06:48,084 --> 00:06:51,020
Well, that's jolly rude.

104
00:06:55,048 --> 00:06:59,004
What treatment do you require?
Make me look stunning.

105
00:07:00,008 --> 00:07:04,000
Stunning will cost 1,600 credits.

106
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:11,028
What can you do for 150?
Quite nice? I'd like
to look quite nice, please.

107
00:07:11,052 --> 00:07:13,000
Insert head.

108
00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:19,020
Been on holiday this year?
Not really, no.

109
00:07:22,008 --> 00:07:24,072
Hmm, quite nice.

110
00:07:31,076 --> 00:07:34,052
Ooh, who's coming in?
Do that up, yeah? You all right?

111
00:07:38,016 --> 00:07:42,052
Henderson! Squadron Leader! Right,
listen up, you men. From now on,

112
00:07:42,072 --> 00:07:47,012
you're all Javs. You're the
best of the elite of the cream.

113
00:07:47,028 --> 00:07:50,016
But don't think that
makes you special.

114
00:07:50,032 --> 00:07:53,024
If you want to get on with me,
do everything I say when I say.

115
00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:57,020
But I don't like yes-men, men.
Introduce me!

116
00:07:57,036 --> 00:08:00,036
Officer Vine, and this is Mr Jeffers.
All right?

117
00:08:00,052 --> 00:08:05,052
This is Sandstrom, our enhanced
Sandstrom. Hello, prestigious man!

118
00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:08,068
And my First Officer, Mr York.

119
00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:10,056
I'm three days old!

120
00:08:12,040 --> 00:08:16,040
This is McCluskey, my enhanced.
He can exchange data with yours.

121
00:08:16,052 --> 00:08:17,096
Ow!

122
00:08:18,016 --> 00:08:23,000
She's always like that when she
meets another one. Hey, I'm not
replacing you, it's all right.

123
00:08:23,020 --> 00:08:27,092
Oh, for goodness sake, Henderson.
If you can't exchange data nicely
you won't exchange data at all!

124
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:31,032
I am so sorry. Sandstrom!
Come to heel!

125
00:08:31,044 --> 00:08:32,036
GROWLING

126
00:08:32,048 --> 00:08:34,024
Stop it!

127
00:08:37,076 --> 00:08:41,020
Display's on Saturday.
First rehearsal tomorrow, 6am.

128
00:08:41,036 --> 00:08:43,084
Six? That's like a lie-in for me.

129
00:08:47,092 --> 00:08:51,016
My goodness, a visitor.
How charming. Chloe!

130
00:08:51,032 --> 00:08:55,016
Hmm. Sorry, have we met?
It's Jeremy. Delicate Flower Jeremy.

131
00:08:55,032 --> 00:08:57,064
What? Jeremy from the dune.

132
00:08:57,080 --> 00:09:00,088
Sorry, it's just that I have
so many loves, so many passions.

133
00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:04,068
To be honest, I lead the life of
an international film star. Chloe.

134
00:09:04,084 --> 00:09:07,008
I've got so much to tell you. Oh...

135
00:09:07,028 --> 00:09:12,024
Come to dinner on my ship tonight.
Well, I'm such an independent
woman and a free spirit and

136
00:09:12,044 --> 00:09:17,036
survivor, I doubt very much I have
time. Let's see, Monday, Tuesday,

137
00:09:17,052 --> 00:09:21,084
Wednesday,
Thursday, Friday - social whirl.

138
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:24,000
So, another time, perhaps?

139
00:09:24,012 --> 00:09:26,080
Farewell and bon viveur.

140
00:09:43,032 --> 00:09:46,004
All right, you'll like this one.
It's called the Dagenham Roll.

141
00:09:46,024 --> 00:09:49,084
Three groups of three ships,
converging, much like Chequers Lane,

142
00:09:50,004 --> 00:09:53,036
Ripple Road and Heathway converge
in the Dagenham itself.

143
00:09:53,056 --> 00:09:56,016
She doesn't wanna see me, Henderson.
God, how do you do it?

144
00:09:56,036 --> 00:10:00,040
How do you live and work
in this ship and not be
driven insane by her beauty?

145
00:10:01,096 --> 00:10:05,056
I muddle through.
Perhaps it's your background.

146
00:10:05,076 --> 00:10:09,092
You weren't brought up to recognise
beauty. For your sort, love is mere
animal rutting. I almost envy you.

147
00:10:10,012 --> 00:10:11,064
Here's another one.
I call it The Bar...

148
00:10:11,064 --> 00:10:12,072
Here's another one.
I call it The Bar...
I can't do it!

149
00:10:12,088 --> 00:10:15,072
I can't be this close
to Chloe and yet so far away.

150
00:10:15,092 --> 00:10:19,080
You can't be in the Green
Javelins, Henderson. I'm sorry.
What? Hey! Why? Hang on.

151
00:10:19,096 --> 00:10:21,096
She really likes you! She does?

152
00:10:22,008 --> 00:10:23,048
Yeah. She said? Yeah.

153
00:10:23,064 --> 00:10:27,032
To who? Me. When?
Earlier. We were chatting. Where?

154
00:10:27,048 --> 00:10:29,020
At the omelette bar. You were? Yes.

155
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:33,036
What did she say?
She said she wants to see you!
She does? When? Yes, tonight.

156
00:10:33,052 --> 00:10:35,016
Tonight? I mean, if you want...

157
00:10:35,032 --> 00:10:39,000
I want. ..I could facilitate
such a meet. You could?

158
00:10:39,016 --> 00:10:42,032
Yes. Hey, leave it to The Hendo.

159
00:10:42,052 --> 00:10:47,016
Oh, Henderson, thank you. Thank you.
If there's ever anything
I can do in return...

160
00:10:47,032 --> 00:10:48,064
Dagenham Roll? No.

161
00:11:03,036 --> 00:11:05,004
Where is he? Oh, good.

162
00:11:05,024 --> 00:11:08,088
Commander. Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Commander, we cannot stay
in the Green Javelins.

163
00:11:09,004 --> 00:11:12,024
I'm a balloon full of emotions
in a world full of pins, frankly.

164
00:11:12,044 --> 00:11:16,016
Really? Yes. All right. Well, look,
you matter more than all this. Oh.

165
00:11:16,036 --> 00:11:19,092
We'll quit the Green Javs. Oh,
Commander. You're such a good man.

166
00:11:20,044 --> 00:11:23,048
Well, yeah, you'd
think that, wouldn't you?

167
00:11:23,068 --> 00:11:28,008
Commander? This is a shuttle craft.
Listen, there's been a bit of
a change of plan, all right?

168
00:11:28,028 --> 00:11:31,028
You're just popping over for dinner
with Jeremy. No, no, Commander.

169
00:11:31,048 --> 00:11:35,084
Listen, it's all on automatic,
just sit back and enjoy the ride.
Commander, no! Absolutely not!

170
00:11:36,004 --> 00:11:39,032
Teal, there is a nice dress and
some perfume under one of the seats.

171
00:11:39,052 --> 00:11:43,060
Oh, yes! No! I will make this up to
you, I promise. Let me out, please!

172
00:11:43,076 --> 00:11:45,032
There are some sheathes in the...

173
00:11:45,048 --> 00:11:48,080
Sheathes? ..Away medi-kit.
But you are under no pressure there.

174
00:11:48,096 --> 00:11:50,080
Absolutely not! Let me off!
BANGING

175
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:54,068
All right, you're trying to smash
the door in with an extinguisher.
Let me off now!

176
00:11:54,084 --> 00:11:56,076
Which is fine, I will
overlook it just this once.

177
00:11:56,096 --> 00:12:00,076
Listen, try and have fun. See you in
the morning! See you in the morning!

178
00:12:00,092 --> 00:12:03,044
Commander, why am I moving?

179
00:12:03,056 --> 00:12:06,044
So many sheathes! How many...

180
00:12:23,052 --> 00:12:28,028
I can spare an hour, no more.
So many suitors. And I hope
the food's exquisite because...

181
00:12:28,044 --> 00:12:29,096
Where were you?

182
00:12:30,016 --> 00:12:33,004
Well, I waited for you all
day but you never came,
and the locals were laughing

183
00:12:33,024 --> 00:12:36,020
at me and they've all got three
mouths, so that's a lot of laughing.

184
00:12:36,036 --> 00:12:37,088
It was the greatest
mistake of my life.

185
00:12:38,004 --> 00:12:40,016
Why did I run off
with that other girl?

186
00:12:40,036 --> 00:12:45,080
She was more popular
than you, she didn't
correct everything I said, but why?

187
00:12:45,096 --> 00:12:48,076
Look, I know I can never
hope to win you back.

188
00:12:48,092 --> 00:12:52,076
No. But I want to cook you the meal
I would have cooked you that night.

189
00:12:52,092 --> 00:12:54,072
Oh, please do.

190
00:12:54,084 --> 00:12:56,032
I will. Ah...

191
00:12:57,004 --> 00:12:58,084
This way. Oh.

192
00:13:00,084 --> 00:13:04,036
York? Uurrhh?
Teal won't mind, will she?
She'll be all right?

193
00:13:04,052 --> 00:13:06,044
Oh, I'm going pot-holing now.

194
00:13:06,060 --> 00:13:10,092
What you talking about?
Ah, it's a parrot's winkle.

195
00:13:11,020 --> 00:13:13,024
Whoa, yeah.

196
00:13:15,028 --> 00:13:16,068
Hair.

197
00:13:16,084 --> 00:13:20,028
York?
BEEPING
Oh, keep the change.

198
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:22,048
Oi, you all right?

199
00:13:23,028 --> 00:13:26,000
Hey, I'm gonna count the skeleton.

200
00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:30,040
Commander?

201
00:13:31,032 --> 00:13:35,016
Do you notice anything
the same about me?

202
00:13:35,032 --> 00:13:39,004
Do you not think I am
exactly as I was a moment ago?

203
00:13:39,020 --> 00:13:42,088
Identical nose, chin matches chin?

204
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,040
What is going on?

205
00:13:45,092 --> 00:13:48,072
Something wonderful.

206
00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:56,060
Ooh, goodie! I haven't had giant
baked-bean on toast in 15 years.

207
00:13:56,076 --> 00:13:58,008
The taste of youth. Yes.

208
00:13:58,024 --> 00:14:00,044
You've had a glittering
career since then.

209
00:14:00,056 --> 00:14:02,032
What, these?

210
00:14:02,044 --> 00:14:04,016
These mean nothing to me.

211
00:14:04,032 --> 00:14:07,024
This one meant nothing to me
six years running.

212
00:14:12,036 --> 00:14:15,000
It's been a lonely
life without you, Chloe.

213
00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:20,008
But surely you have your
agnosticism? That helps me in
hard times. I lost my agnosticism.

214
00:14:20,028 --> 00:14:26,000
Oh, but Jeremy! If you don't
have the belief there may or may
not be a god, what do you have?

215
00:14:26,020 --> 00:14:31,088
Help me find it again, Chloe.
Sing for me. Sing one of those
old agnostic hymns. Oh, I couldn't.

216
00:14:32,004 --> 00:14:36,032
♪ I have
a vague feeling inside of me

217
00:14:36,044 --> 00:14:40,052
♪ A hazy spirituality

218
00:14:40,064 --> 00:14:44,008
♪ It fills me halfway

219
00:14:44,020 --> 00:14:46,000
♪ But not to the top

220
00:14:46,084 --> 00:14:49,096
♪ Empirical reasoning

221
00:14:50,008 --> 00:14:55,032
♪ Makes it stop

222
00:14:55,044 --> 00:15:01,076
♪ But not quite. ♪

223
00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,088
What is that?

224
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,020
Hello, sailor.

225
00:15:08,036 --> 00:15:13,028
It's a replica me, created
from cells shed from my own body.

226
00:15:13,044 --> 00:15:15,060
Scabs, toenails, hairs,
certain other emissions.

227
00:15:15,076 --> 00:15:17,064
Emissions? Emissions.

228
00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:21,024
When I had collected my own body
weight... In emissions? In emissions

229
00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:25,060
Then I was ready to fashion
this work of genius.

230
00:15:25,076 --> 00:15:26,092
Don't eat your fingers!

231
00:15:27,008 --> 00:15:32,000
Oh, no. Think of the implications
for ship discipline, Commander.

232
00:15:32,020 --> 00:15:37,064
Soon there will be four Yorks,
then ten Yorks and then a York for
every single person on this ship!

233
00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:40,040
That is a lot of emissions, York.

234
00:15:40,056 --> 00:15:44,004
Absolutely not. It is a freak
and it's going in the bin.

235
00:15:44,020 --> 00:15:45,024
No disrespect to you.

236
00:15:45,036 --> 00:15:47,012
That's all right, fatty.

237
00:15:48,072 --> 00:15:53,008
Why would you teach it that? You
can teach it anything you want.

238
00:15:53,092 --> 00:15:59,088
♪ Run to the streets, tell everyone
He might have made the trees

239
00:16:00,004 --> 00:16:02,004
♪ He may have made the sun

240
00:16:02,016 --> 00:16:05,056
♪ Oh thank you, if you're there

241
00:16:05,072 --> 00:16:09,012
♪ If you're not we shan't
despair...♪

242
00:16:09,024 --> 00:16:12,080
Kiss me. Don't stop singing.

243
00:16:12,096 --> 00:16:15,096
MUMBLED: # Run to the streets,
tell everyone

244
00:16:16,012 --> 00:16:19,064
♪ He might have made the trees
He may have made the sun... ♪

245
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:25,008
'And into Chelsea Smile. Go!

246
00:16:34,036 --> 00:16:37,036
'Oh, come on, we need
it tighter on the day.'

247
00:16:37,052 --> 00:16:40,056
Pull up 20, reheat engine four.

248
00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:43,024
You won't get much sense out
of Chloe today, Henderson.

249
00:16:43,040 --> 00:16:45,040
She didn't get much sleep.

250
00:16:45,052 --> 00:16:47,044
Jeremy! Don't!

251
00:16:47,060 --> 00:16:51,072
They don't want to know what we
got up to last night. Six times.

252
00:16:51,088 --> 00:16:54,056
Seven-two split,
ready for crossover.

253
00:16:54,068 --> 00:16:56,080
And that! Yup.

254
00:16:56,092 --> 00:16:58,060
Smoke on.

255
00:16:59,032 --> 00:17:01,028
ENGINES ROAR

256
00:17:03,092 --> 00:17:05,096
What did you do six times?

257
00:17:06,008 --> 00:17:07,076
Teal, no, Teal, get...

258
00:17:07,088 --> 00:17:09,092
Teal.

259
00:17:10,004 --> 00:17:11,068
Oh, you've aroused her now.

260
00:17:11,080 --> 00:17:13,064
Henderson! Call that a crossover?

261
00:17:13,076 --> 00:17:15,028
Sorry, I've got a horny pilot.

262
00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:18,020
Man pie! Ha ha ha. Teal!

263
00:17:18,032 --> 00:17:20,012
Don't like it.

264
00:17:26,060 --> 00:17:28,036
Think of the pub.

265
00:17:28,048 --> 00:17:30,084
Serving pints on Sunday afternoon.

266
00:17:30,096 --> 00:17:33,056
Yeah.

267
00:17:33,072 --> 00:17:35,096
Don't do it!
Oh, you are having a laugh.

268
00:17:36,012 --> 00:17:38,044
Right, you little bugger,
for that, both knees.

269
00:17:38,056 --> 00:17:39,092
No! Jeffers! No!

270
00:17:41,028 --> 00:17:44,004
No!

271
00:17:51,028 --> 00:17:54,072
Those officers not fight
like hens in a coop.

272
00:17:54,088 --> 00:17:57,048
Now you know what I must do.

273
00:17:57,060 --> 00:17:59,056
Show you the angry leg.

274
00:17:59,072 --> 00:18:01,012
Furious.

275
00:18:01,028 --> 00:18:03,004
Now we join the
friend gang with names.

276
00:18:03,020 --> 00:18:08,044
You are Binky, you are Mrs Binky
and I am Number 17.

277
00:18:08,060 --> 00:18:12,008
Now we'll do the friendship salute.
BEEPING

278
00:18:12,024 --> 00:18:16,068
Ploon, ploon, plume, ploon, ploon.

279
00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:20,028
Oh.

280
00:18:26,056 --> 00:18:29,080
Hello. Hello there.

281
00:18:38,076 --> 00:18:40,064
Let's go boating, Chloe!

282
00:18:40,076 --> 00:18:43,012
Ooh, you're full of surprises!

283
00:18:43,024 --> 00:18:45,032
Here, let me. In you get.

284
00:18:45,044 --> 00:18:47,080
Thank you. Careful on the...

285
00:18:50,084 --> 00:18:52,068
'Select voyage.

286
00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:55,088
'Venice, Yukon, or Lea Valley.'

287
00:18:56,004 --> 00:18:58,088
Oh, Lea Valley!
We said the same thing!

288
00:19:03,028 --> 00:19:05,012
SHE MOANS

289
00:19:05,024 --> 00:19:07,048
Stroke. Yes...

290
00:19:07,060 --> 00:19:11,040
Oi! Posho! Who are they?

291
00:19:11,056 --> 00:19:13,068
I don't know why
they put these things in.

292
00:19:13,084 --> 00:19:18,032
You gonna give her one, then?
Go away! Or I'll thrash you.

293
00:19:18,048 --> 00:19:21,040
Such discipline. That's right.

294
00:19:22,048 --> 00:19:27,088
This is lovely.
It'll be like this every day when
you transfer to my ship. Transfer?

295
00:19:28,008 --> 00:19:30,068
I have to be close to you, Chloe.
I know...

296
00:19:30,088 --> 00:19:34,032
but I mean we're in the
Green Javelins so I can
pop over whenever I like.

297
00:19:34,052 --> 00:19:38,036
Oh, Henderson's not staying in
the Javs. He's a hairy old ranker.

298
00:19:38,056 --> 00:19:42,036
He's filling for one show.
There's a proper ship on its way,
with a proper Commander.

299
00:19:42,052 --> 00:19:43,092
Yes, a proper...

300
00:19:44,004 --> 00:19:45,080
I can't leave the Commander.

301
00:19:45,092 --> 00:19:48,092
I mean, I am his rock. You have to.

302
00:19:49,008 --> 00:19:51,028
You're asking me to break
myself in two.

303
00:19:51,044 --> 00:19:53,084
I am a woman, not a cheese straw!

304
00:19:58,052 --> 00:20:02,016
It cannot be. You have shamed me.

305
00:20:02,032 --> 00:20:05,048
You don't deserve
to wear that visage.

306
00:20:05,064 --> 00:20:08,020
I don't deserve to wear that visage.

307
00:20:10,012 --> 00:20:12,068
There is an organic matter
compacter on level eight.

308
00:20:12,084 --> 00:20:15,040
You will climb in
and recycle yourself.

309
00:20:15,056 --> 00:20:18,076
I never wish to see you again.

310
00:20:18,088 --> 00:20:21,052
Ploon.

311
00:20:21,064 --> 00:20:23,036
Be gone!

312
00:20:23,048 --> 00:20:25,084
Ah.

313
00:20:25,096 --> 00:20:29,004
That's sad.

314
00:20:30,096 --> 00:20:32,020
Dad.

315
00:20:34,012 --> 00:20:39,040
Ah. Sad.

316
00:20:39,052 --> 00:20:41,024
Ah.

317
00:20:41,036 --> 00:20:42,092
Jeremy.

318
00:20:43,008 --> 00:20:46,004
Tell me! Tell me you'll
leave him and come to me!

319
00:20:46,016 --> 00:20:47,064
I can't!

320
00:20:47,076 --> 00:20:49,024
Right, well,

321
00:20:50,056 --> 00:20:52,072
you leave me no option
but to drown myself!

322
00:20:56,020 --> 00:20:58,060
Damn these realistic simulations!

323
00:20:58,072 --> 00:21:00,064
Throw us a fish, mate!

324
00:21:00,076 --> 00:21:02,080
Delete teen problem!

325
00:21:02,092 --> 00:21:07,036
Get off my boat! But Jeremy.

326
00:21:07,048 --> 00:21:08,088
Go!

327
00:21:10,048 --> 00:21:12,000
Not the brie.

328
00:21:12,012 --> 00:21:13,052
Go!

329
00:21:20,048 --> 00:21:23,004
Oh, Jeremy.

330
00:21:23,016 --> 00:21:24,084
I sad! I is really sad. Ah.

331
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:37,028
Chloooeeeee!

332
00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:42,012
SNORING

333
00:21:42,024 --> 00:21:44,080
This is a perfect Dagenham Roll.

334
00:21:48,056 --> 00:21:53,084
Welcome to 22nd Space Show of
Moonbase Theta, the little moonbase
with the big ideas!

335
00:21:54,004 --> 00:21:59,072
The Green Javelins are on their way,
but first, here's the Utterly
Butterly Barnstormers!

336
00:21:59,088 --> 00:22:03,040
Ah, it's Amorf Spets isn't it? Hmm?

337
00:22:03,056 --> 00:22:05,068
I'm Space Marshal Clarke.
And what are you?

338
00:22:05,080 --> 00:22:07,064
I'm human. That's right.

339
00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:12,028
Keira Knightley, Adolf
Hitler - human.

340
00:22:12,044 --> 00:22:16,020
My name Amorf Spets. I come
see if I want to buy your ships.

341
00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:20,008
Yes, well, the Green Javelins
use Wendover class ships.

342
00:22:20,024 --> 00:22:22,084
Mr Human Man, I have question.

343
00:22:22,096 --> 00:22:25,016
Go ahead. My name Amorf Spets. Good.

344
00:22:25,032 --> 00:22:29,064
How many, how many, how many,
how many chin ups can you do?

345
00:22:29,076 --> 00:22:33,068
I do 73.

346
00:22:40,020 --> 00:22:42,016
'All ships, opening positions.'

347
00:23:02,032 --> 00:23:04,080
You ready? Uh-huh.

348
00:23:04,092 --> 00:23:06,076
Ready?

349
00:23:10,012 --> 00:23:12,004
I'm a Green Javelin, Mum.

350
00:23:13,060 --> 00:23:15,008
I'm doing this for you, old girl!

351
00:23:19,004 --> 00:23:22,060
OK, guys, let's do this. Show speed.

352
00:23:30,072 --> 00:23:33,048
Look, and there they are!

353
00:23:35,056 --> 00:23:42,080
Mr Man, Mr Human Man, tell me, tell
me with your human mouth. Yes.

354
00:23:42,096 --> 00:23:45,028
What is most books
you read in one holiday?

355
00:23:45,040 --> 00:23:47,076
Three.

356
00:23:47,088 --> 00:23:49,040
My name Amorf Spets. I know.

357
00:23:49,052 --> 00:23:53,036
Sorry, 94, and was only mini-break.

358
00:23:55,024 --> 00:23:57,096
'Seven-two split, go.

359
00:23:59,064 --> 00:24:01,024
'Ready for crossover.'

360
00:24:01,036 --> 00:24:03,016
Cut left auxiliaries on my mark.

361
00:24:03,028 --> 00:24:04,068
Mark!

362
00:24:13,012 --> 00:24:15,036
'Chloe. Have you changed your mind?'

363
00:24:15,048 --> 00:24:17,028
No.

364
00:24:19,020 --> 00:24:22,088
Commander. I think they're
coming straight for us!

365
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,044
Um.

366
00:24:25,024 --> 00:24:27,040
Sandstrom, evade! Evade!

367
00:24:35,092 --> 00:24:39,060
Why they do that?
That look very wrong.

368
00:24:39,072 --> 00:24:42,016
I have no idea.

369
00:24:42,032 --> 00:24:46,028
- Mr York, report?
- Heavy impact damage.
Propulsion off-line.

370
00:24:46,044 --> 00:24:49,040
Weapons off-line!
What the hell are you doing, Mason?

371
00:24:49,056 --> 00:24:53,064
I've locked my crew out of
the room, no-one can stop me.

372
00:24:53,080 --> 00:24:56,068
If I can't have her, nobody can!

373
00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,048
Better we all die!

374
00:24:58,060 --> 00:25:01,028
Oh, you've not had a row, have you?

375
00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:03,092
They've had a row!

376
00:25:04,008 --> 00:25:06,080
If anyone's interested,
he's coming back for us.

377
00:25:06,092 --> 00:25:09,036
Goodbye, Chloe!

378
00:25:14,068 --> 00:25:16,096
15 seconds to impact. 14 now.

379
00:25:17,008 --> 00:25:19,032
Someone's taken shuttle three.

380
00:25:19,044 --> 00:25:21,072
It's heading straight for Mason.

381
00:25:21,084 --> 00:25:24,020
Shuttle three. Identify!

382
00:25:24,032 --> 00:25:26,084
'Hello.'

383
00:25:29,052 --> 00:25:34,028
'I do this for you,
Eduardo Pauline York.

384
00:25:39,012 --> 00:25:42,092
'Bye.' Bye, son!

385
00:25:53,084 --> 00:25:56,004
THUNDEROUS EXPLOSION

386
00:26:11,092 --> 00:26:13,076
Chloe!

387
00:26:16,028 --> 00:26:17,052
CRASHING

388
00:26:21,076 --> 00:26:23,084
CRACK!

389
00:26:28,044 --> 00:26:31,048
Hmm, not bad.

390
00:26:31,060 --> 00:26:33,080
We order 30.

391
00:26:52,076 --> 00:26:56,032
SOFT TAPPING

392
00:27:04,056 --> 00:27:06,084
He tried to kill us. Yes, he did.

393
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,052
Mason, did you try to kill them?
No, I didn't.

394
00:27:09,068 --> 00:27:12,012
That's the enquiry done.
How about a drink? Seven o'clock?

395
00:27:12,028 --> 00:27:14,088
Oh, how's Jane and the kids?
Wonderful.

396
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:16,068
HE LAUGHS

397
00:27:16,084 --> 00:27:19,044
It's one of each now, isn't it?
Wives? Kids.

398
00:27:19,056 --> 00:27:20,036
THEY CHORTLE

399
00:27:30,024 --> 00:27:36,008
The Space Force
Bumper Book of Grief Control
tells us that at times like...

400
00:27:40,020 --> 00:27:45,036
He wasn't like us.
He was made from...

401
00:27:45,052 --> 00:27:49,016
Let's just say he wasn't like us.

402
00:27:49,032 --> 00:27:51,068
But there was a heart in there.
KNOCKING

403
00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:55,024
I'm dead. Ha ha.

404
00:27:56,084 --> 00:28:02,056
That was full of more courage than
any heart that has ever beated.
Has anyone seen the hand?

405
00:28:02,076 --> 00:28:07,020
And so as we commit his body to the
void, so the void in us is filled...

406
00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:12,060
KNOCKING
..with love. We shall remember him
and Britain shall remember it, him.

407
00:28:12,076 --> 00:28:14,064
Hello?

408
00:28:14,076 --> 00:28:16,084
Room service.

409
00:28:16,096 --> 00:28:20,068
Ah-Amen.

410
00:28:33,084 --> 00:28:37,068
KNOCKING
So would you like to hear a story?

411
00:28:37,084 --> 00:28:42,084
No, I wouldn't. All right, once upon
an eyelid there lived a mouse flap.

412
00:28:47,008 --> 00:28:47,012
He said, "I won't shine
a torch on the meat..."