1 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:09,516 (MUSIC: "DANSE MACABRE" BY SAINT-SAËNS) 2 00:00:45,760 --> 00:00:47,830 (CREAKING) 3 00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:17,038 Mother! 4 00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:19,998 Are you going to let him go ahead with this? 5 00:03:22,920 --> 00:03:24,911 For God's sake! 6 00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:12,592 (CHURCH BELLS PEAL) 7 00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:49,672 Taxi! 8 00:05:50,560 --> 00:05:53,358 Department of Cytology, London University. 9 00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:02,596 (DRILL WHIRRS) 10 00:06:06,240 --> 00:06:09,152 So we keep the trousers from the opening. 11 00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:14,440 For the shirt, I'm thinking of something in shot silk. Maybe in charcoal. 12 00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:19,071 Or we could go for the sable, if you prefer. Or the ebony. 13 00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:22,949 - Ebony's nice. - Ebony could work very well. 14 00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:27,318 I can lift out your masculinity. Shall we go with that, then? 15 00:06:27,480 --> 00:06:29,471 No problem. That's very good. 16 00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:31,631 Morning, Adam. 17 00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:34,155 Managed to get the video pen working? 18 00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:38,313 Yes. Just some minor glitch with the fibre-optics. 19 00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:40,994 OK, Elsa, my angel. 20 00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:44,436 - We're all done... - Jack the Ripper? 21 00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:50,197 Oh, yes. Monday night, I'm going to need some sort of frock coat and top hat. 22 00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:52,351 A frock coat for Monday. 23 00:06:53,520 --> 00:06:55,875 What is this Jack the Ripper? 24 00:06:56,040 --> 00:07:00,511 Don't sully her mind with it. The innocence is too beguiling. 25 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:10,872 Is that a dream ticket, Jonathan? 29 years old and still whiter than white. 26 00:07:11,040 --> 00:07:13,793 - I don't mean her laundry. - Makes a change. 27 00:07:13,960 --> 00:07:17,350 She's still physically intact, in every sense. 28 00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:21,069 She's never felt a man's tongue on her epiglottis. 29 00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:24,710 - You know that for a fact? - I've done my research. 30 00:07:24,880 --> 00:07:30,591 Born in a conservative region of Austria - known locally as the Chastity Belt - 31 00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:35,675 a delicate Alpine flower for whom sex and alcohol are off-limits. 32 00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:37,990 Maybe if I switched drinks? 33 00:07:38,160 --> 00:07:42,358 That's the closest you'll get to an exchange of fluids. 34 00:07:42,520 --> 00:07:44,988 We've got a lot to get through. 35 00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:30,955 I've gone for a word. Please God it's in there. 36 00:09:31,120 --> 00:09:33,076 Open up the Bard. 37 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:37,477 Start fanning pages and stop anywhere. 38 00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:42,151 - Stab the pen down... - Twirl it, Adam. 39 00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:45,596 - Or we can't mix to the pre-record. - Right. 40 00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:49,469 Hold the pen up, spin it round and around... 41 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:53,030 - and... - Coming to playback now. 42 00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:55,794 Hit it. "Stratagem." 43 00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:59,589 Which, in a triumph of extra-sensory acuity, is... 44 00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:02,274 Oh! Aaagh. 45 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:07,832 (PHONE RINGS) 46 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:16,351 - Hello? - Hi. Is Jonathan around at all? 47 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:21,230 I'll see if I can find him. Who's calling? Hang on a second. 48 00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:32,310 These gallstones of yours are going to drag us all right down the Swanee if we're not careful. 49 00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:36,951 - Get them seen to. - Because I have a small problem with hospitals, Jonathan. 50 00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:39,793 Satire begins to pall after a while. 51 00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:42,428 "Can't you make them disappear by magic, Mr. Klaus?" 52 00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:45,956 "Watch that proctoscope, he's got a rabbit up there." 53 00:10:46,120 --> 00:10:48,475 Every other asinine quip known to man. 54 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:54,072 I didn't tell you who I nearly bumped into this morning. 55 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:59,360 Remember Marella Carney - the Black Canary? Retired about 15 years ago. 56 00:11:00,720 --> 00:11:03,712 - I was in the front row at her final performance. 57 00:11:03,880 --> 00:11:08,237 I always had this fantasy that when the guillotine fell, her head would fall into my lap... 58 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:12,393 It wasn't her I saw, it was her daughter, Charlotte. 59 00:11:12,560 --> 00:11:17,429 - Who, if you remember... - Oh, that's right. Was the great lust of your life at one time. 60 00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:22,633 - You were walking around like some kind of zombie for weeks. - Till it came to grief. 61 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:25,633 After I got round to asking her out. 62 00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:30,555 We went for a meal - all lovely - taxi back to her place in Kensington. 63 00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:35,077 She asked me in for coffee and I said no. That was the last I saw of her. 64 00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:39,152 Sorry. You lost me towards the end there. 65 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:44,677 Charlotte Carney - who I desired more than oxygen - 66 00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:49,675 asked me into her flat at one in the morning? There's got to be a catch. 67 00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:54,709 "Have you met my fiancé Crispin? He's got two penises and his own airline." 68 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:59,351 Or I whisper "I love you" and she attacks me with a fire extinguisher. 69 00:11:59,520 --> 00:12:02,114 I can do without that kind of humiliation. 70 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:06,956 Your love life would make a fine play by Samuel Beckett. 71 00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:10,396 It's the nihilistic quality it has. 72 00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:20,868 She never called me again afterwards, which only proves my point... 73 00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:23,110 (PHONE RINGS) 74 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:26,191 - Hello? - Jonathan. 75 00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:30,353 Do you want to pop over this evening? I'll cook something. 76 00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:33,796 No. Why should there be a reason? I'm just... 77 00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:41,518 Look. All right. I need you tonight. Here in my bedroom. 78 00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:10,433 There are certain things I don't like staring at in bed. 79 00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:15,879 Anything less than two inches long... Don't bring it near me! Get rid of it! 80 00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:18,873 It's a cockroach. It's very friendly. 81 00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:23,158 Just have sex with it, you thoroughly revolting person! 82 00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:27,154 Oh, dispose of it, please! Not down the toilet! 83 00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:31,108 Take it to the garden and kill it with a spade. 84 00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:34,511 Kill it with a spade? Am I Jack the Hat McVitie? 85 00:13:34,680 --> 00:13:39,037 Just do it! God Almighty! And don't be such a doily. 86 00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:45,588 That's the third one this week. I don't know where they're coming from. 87 00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:51,550 (MOBILE PHONE RINGS) 88 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:03,472 - Yeah. Hello. - Hello? Is that? 89 00:14:03,640 --> 00:14:06,473 Sorry. I'm trying to reach Jonathan Creek. 90 00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:10,713 Yeah. He's popped out for a second. Who's calling? 91 00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:14,077 - Charlotte Carney. - OK. Just a sec... 92 00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:18,189 Just one second, Charlotte. 93 00:14:18,360 --> 00:14:22,558 I'll probably go to hell for that - snuffing out a living thing. 94 00:14:22,720 --> 00:14:25,598 Call for you. A Charlotte Carney. 95 00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:31,154 - Hello. - Jonathan? 96 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:35,597 It was you I passed this morning. 97 00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:39,435 - Sorry? - You wouldn't have noticed me. 98 00:14:39,600 --> 00:14:44,151 Three years ago. Changed beyond all recognition, probably. 99 00:14:45,800 --> 00:14:47,791 I'm sorry... 100 00:14:49,160 --> 00:14:51,993 This is the worst day of my life. 101 00:14:52,160 --> 00:14:54,913 What happened? 102 00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:57,833 Remember something you said to me once? 103 00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:03,039 There's no such thing as magic. Real magic. 104 00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:06,988 You didn't believe in anything you couldn't touch or see. 105 00:15:10,680 --> 00:15:14,309 This afternoon, at four o'clock... 106 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,634 my mother killed herself. 107 00:15:21,440 --> 00:15:24,079 How she did, I defy anyone to explain. 108 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:30,156 It's like a kind of madness has taken over and there are no rules anymore about life! 109 00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:33,471 Or death. 110 00:15:44,560 --> 00:15:46,357 Charlotte? 111 00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:57,910 I can't believe we're doing this 112 00:15:58,080 --> 00:16:02,596 after one hysterical phone call from some floozy you met at a party. 113 00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:05,797 There was never even anything between you. 114 00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:09,236 Do you ever get this thing serviced? 115 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:12,676 How can anyone drive without a windscreen washer? 116 00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:17,960 - It's got a windscreen washer. - But it's no use on the back seat! 117 00:16:18,120 --> 00:16:21,510 The guy who was going to fit it did a runner. 118 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,319 A bit of fresh air won't harm you. 119 00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:27,392 So what's the story on her mother? 120 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:31,678 Marella Carney, the Black Canary. Wasn't she big business? 121 00:16:31,840 --> 00:16:35,753 Most of her tricks relied on the fact she had a twin sister. 122 00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:39,959 - Don't be ridiculous. - Who did all the difficult bits. 123 00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:44,955 Marella suffered from claustrophobia, so her sister went into all the cabinets. 124 00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:48,749 Using a double isn't exactly a test of ingenuity. 125 00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:53,835 - Two of them? They kept that quiet. - They'd hardly put it in the programme! 126 00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,833 "Whilst escaping from a locked trunk, 127 00:16:57,000 --> 00:17:00,470 "Miss Carney will be assisted by her twin, Beryl." 128 00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:03,359 - That was before the accident. - What accident? 129 00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:07,274 - It's a bit on the grisly side. - What accident? 130 00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:12,514 - I don't know if you've got the stomach. - Don't give me that macho protective stuff. 131 00:17:12,680 --> 00:17:16,195 At rehearsal one day, one of their big routines, 132 00:17:16,360 --> 00:17:21,388 her sister Beryl's tied up to a bench with an electric buzz saw coming at her. 133 00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:24,597 The mechanism jammed and she was sawn in half. 134 00:17:24,760 --> 00:17:27,638 - Oh, my God! - Lengthways. 135 00:17:27,800 --> 00:17:29,711 Lengthways?! Oh! 136 00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:32,872 Careful! You'll have us off the road. 137 00:17:37,440 --> 00:17:42,833 Sawn in half... What the hell did you have to tell me that for? 138 00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:50,110 With an electric buzz saw? Oh! That's done it for me now. 139 00:17:50,280 --> 00:17:53,317 I'll sleep with a saucepan between my legs. 140 00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:57,473 - How far up do you think it went before? - Far enough. 141 00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:02,236 They kept it quiet. Just said Marella was retiring "for personal reasons". 142 00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:08,714 That is the most unutterably horrible story I have ever heard. 143 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:11,872 Accidents can happen. People don't realise... 144 00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:14,759 What? 145 00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:18,791 - What? - I suppose I'd never really... 146 00:18:19,800 --> 00:18:22,268 Assuming it was an accident. 147 00:18:24,720 --> 00:18:27,280 Can we move or they'll have to chip us out. 148 00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:40,313 I'm sorry if I put the wind up you last night. It's just... 149 00:18:41,880 --> 00:18:46,590 I think we're all in need of a cold hard cynical mind right now. 150 00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:48,830 Take us through it. 151 00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:54,354 15 years ago, my mother and her sister Beryl 152 00:18:54,520 --> 00:18:59,275 were running through this new trick with an electric saw. 153 00:19:06,320 --> 00:19:10,279 The blade that was meant to drop away jammed. 154 00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:12,431 (AGONISED SCREAMS) 155 00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:16,593 Yes! We've got a general picture of what happened. 156 00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:20,797 So you'd have been about 12 at the time? 157 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:28,712 Fortunately, or not - depending how you look at it - Auntie Beryl had no one close. 158 00:19:29,720 --> 00:19:35,636 She'd parted from her husband ten years before. He'd disappeared from the picture. 159 00:19:36,480 --> 00:19:41,759 Her daughter, my cousin Hannah, had run away from home in her late teens - 160 00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:43,911 as you did in the '70s - 161 00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:48,551 with some keyboard player to Australia to find God in a sugar cube. 162 00:19:49,520 --> 00:19:52,193 She sent back a poem in Aborigine. 163 00:19:52,360 --> 00:19:56,956 The vicar read it at the funeral. It sounded like he was having a seizure. 164 00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:02,996 No one expected to see her this side of the Equator ever again. 165 00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:07,278 Until a couple of weeks ago, quite out of the blue... 166 00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:09,908 this letter arrived. 167 00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:23,718 From Hannah. She's coming to England. 168 00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,348 Long-lost niece Hannah? 169 00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:31,472 She say when? 170 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:50,068 You could understand her being nervous. 171 00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:54,518 My cousin could come back with a grudge against the aunt 172 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:58,958 who was involved in her mother's death. But... I don't know. 173 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,991 There was something else. 174 00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:08,316 Some kind of deeper unease which just took root and festered. 175 00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:12,712 Then she turned up with this Vietnamese character, Pan Duc Lao. 176 00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:25,636 (HANNAH) Most of it seems pretty unreal now. That's what's so wonderful. 177 00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:30,191 She was older now and wiser - this was the story. 178 00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:35,798 During her travels, she'd been converted to the wonders of Eastern mysticism, 179 00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:38,952 which had been largely ignored by the West. 180 00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:43,517 Lao was what they call a "psychic surgeon", 181 00:21:43,680 --> 00:21:49,118 with "powers that went beyond the compass of known medical science. " 182 00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:51,589 My father was up for all of that. 183 00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:55,275 Anything to help his angina or crumbling bones. 184 00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:57,908 You have to believe this, Jonathan. 185 00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:02,676 The night before last, I watched it happen in front of me. 186 00:22:02,840 --> 00:22:08,039 He put his fingers inside my father's chest, pulled out some kind of tissue... 187 00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:15,150 and after, it was like he hadn't touched him - not a mark on the skin. 188 00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:20,439 None of us got much sleep that night. 189 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:22,431 (SOBBING) 190 00:22:22,600 --> 00:22:25,068 Least of all my mother. 191 00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:35,111 The next morning, they were just leaving. 192 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:41,152 She said how pleased she was to have helped my father, 193 00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:44,357 but now they had important work to do, so... 194 00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:50,870 I'd hoped that would be an end to the horror... 195 00:22:52,440 --> 00:22:54,396 but it was the beginning. 196 00:22:55,120 --> 00:22:59,716 You work in the magic business too, then, Mr Creek? 197 00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:02,235 - Yes, with... - What's that? 198 00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:06,029 - With Adam Klaus, yes. - Jerry Bellinitus. 199 00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:09,992 My hearing's not very good. I have to lipread. 200 00:23:10,160 --> 00:23:12,390 - We're sorry... - What? 201 00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:15,632 We were sorry to hear about your wife. 202 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,792 I gather you actually saw it happen. 203 00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:25,956 Nothing wrong with my eyes. They're the one bit of me that still works. 204 00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:32,633 Father and I left the house at about 10.30 yesterday. 205 00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:37,032 I'd got a lecture at 12 and you were meeting someone for lunch. 206 00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:42,672 Yes. When I got back, at about 2.30... 207 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:46,952 the weather seemed to be easing up finally. 208 00:23:47,840 --> 00:23:52,709 Although, by that time, we'd had a good four or five inches of snow. 209 00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:58,432 - How was Mr Deluth and his hairpiece? - On good form. 210 00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:04,038 It's when he falls asleep and it slips over his eyes, you feel the game's up. 211 00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:08,512 How have things been here? Any sign of improvement? 212 00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:13,674 She's been up in her room with a migraine. I couldn't tempt her with lunch. 213 00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:16,559 Some hormone thing, I expect. 214 00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:20,315 There'll be an ovary at the back of it somewhere. 215 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:26,630 White pill and pink capsule for four o'clock, glass of water. 216 00:24:26,800 --> 00:24:30,031 Alarm all set should you nod off, OK? 217 00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:33,192 I'm off to the woodshed to do some whittling. 218 00:24:33,360 --> 00:24:37,399 - You're a diamond, Lionel. - Sweet dreams, Jerry. 219 00:24:49,000 --> 00:24:52,515 An hour must have gone by. When I opened my eyes, 220 00:24:52,680 --> 00:24:58,710 out in the garden, my wife was having what appeared to be some sort of argument. 221 00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:10,118 That was enough for this character, he just turned and left 222 00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:14,273 as fast as his legs, and a nasty limp, would carry him. 223 00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:17,034 (ALARM RINGS) 224 00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:22,433 What happened next, nothing in the world could have prepared me for. 225 00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:30,512 (GUNSHOT) 226 00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:32,591 No! 227 00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:38,196 Marella! 228 00:25:38,360 --> 00:25:40,749 Marella! 229 00:25:46,360 --> 00:25:48,351 Please... Oh, God... 230 00:25:58,120 --> 00:25:59,917 Jerry! 231 00:26:00,080 --> 00:26:03,789 Dear God in heaven! What happened? 232 00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:07,509 She just put the barrel in her mouth. 233 00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,399 They were arguing. Some man. He ran off. 234 00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:13,791 - Man? What man? - A man! 235 00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:16,758 He was there just a couple of minutes ago. 236 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:23,790 Of course, that's when I saw it. The insanity of it staring me in the face. 237 00:26:24,760 --> 00:26:31,029 The man - whoever he was, whatever he was - had left no footprints in the snow. 238 00:26:46,240 --> 00:26:48,629 Charlotte... Charlotte. 239 00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:50,597 I'm sorry. 240 00:26:53,040 --> 00:26:55,315 Mr Bellinitus? Sorry. 241 00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:58,233 - I'm a little confused. - What? 242 00:26:58,400 --> 00:27:03,918 What you've said about what happened doesn't seem to make any sense. 243 00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:08,358 He was out there. I saw him. As plainly as I see... 244 00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:15,119 No. Your wife, sir, you said turned the gun on herself in the garden at four o'clock? 245 00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:19,956 - Yes. Why? What? - Forgive me, but that's not possible. 246 00:27:20,120 --> 00:27:24,352 The extent of rigor in the eyelids, face and jaw... 247 00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:28,513 There's no way that lady took her life only 40 minutes ago. 248 00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:31,433 It'll have to be confirmed but... 249 00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:35,875 At the time you say your wife pulled that trigger, 250 00:27:36,040 --> 00:27:40,830 I'd say she'd already been dead at least five hours. 251 00:27:44,360 --> 00:27:48,353 We all saw what that man could do the other night. 252 00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:52,632 Was this another example of his powers? 253 00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:59,072 I'm afraid all that miracle healing is just a very clever confidence trick. 254 00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:02,152 Those guys are ten a penny back home. 255 00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:08,395 Some of them have false fingers that squash up as if they're penetrating your flesh. 256 00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:12,269 They palm some animal tissue and a blood capsule 257 00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:14,908 and the rest of it's in the performance. 258 00:28:15,080 --> 00:28:17,913 I assume a small fee was involved? 259 00:28:18,080 --> 00:28:19,798 Well... 260 00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:23,839 A donation to their hospital, obviously. 261 00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:26,673 But you can't write off the rest of it. 262 00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:30,833 What kind of man leaves no footprints in the snow? 263 00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:33,551 Mmm. 264 00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:38,230 So before your cousin came, your mother was fine? 265 00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:42,395 Which does make her death look a bit dodgy. 266 00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:44,278 Well, except... 267 00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:47,315 You've got the suicide note. 268 00:28:48,320 --> 00:28:52,438 Presuming that's what it is. We found it last night in her room. 269 00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:57,350 Do you want to take the lift? 270 00:28:57,520 --> 00:29:00,637 - It'll be a squeeze. - May as well. 271 00:29:07,680 --> 00:29:11,195 Your father, Charlotte, where do I know him from? 272 00:29:11,360 --> 00:29:15,831 Jerry Bellinitus... Was he that wrestler with the long floppy hair? 273 00:29:16,000 --> 00:29:19,072 - Pardon? - That was Jackie Pallo. 274 00:29:24,640 --> 00:29:31,239 My father was a singer-songwriter, popular in the 1960s. "Surrender Your Arms to Mine"? 275 00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:33,834 Yes. He did that act with an owl. 276 00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:36,594 - An owl? - Who am I thinking of, then? 277 00:29:42,880 --> 00:29:45,474 Forgive her? For what? 278 00:29:54,080 --> 00:29:56,753 They got on all right together, did they? 279 00:29:56,920 --> 00:30:00,390 Yes. It doesn't quite fit the script. 280 00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:04,599 "Exploited assistant resents success of famous sister. 281 00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:08,833 "Threatens to reveal all and has to be disposed of." 282 00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:15,158 The truth is, they loved each other. Everything they earned, they shared 50-50. 283 00:30:15,320 --> 00:30:19,552 - So as far as money was concerned... - Split down the middle. 284 00:30:22,320 --> 00:30:25,153 Notice she signed this with a kiss. 285 00:30:25,320 --> 00:30:27,038 Yes. 286 00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:30,558 Hmm. 287 00:30:51,920 --> 00:30:56,391 Bit of a poser, wouldn't you say? One way and another. 288 00:30:56,560 --> 00:31:01,634 Adds a bit of spice to the otherwise humdrum routine of the Criminal Investigation Department. 289 00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:04,075 Detective Inspector Gideon Pryke. 290 00:31:04,240 --> 00:31:07,471 - Jonathan Creek. I'm a... - Friend of the family. 291 00:31:07,640 --> 00:31:10,632 No mean theorist in your own right, they say. 292 00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:16,830 No worries. I'm not so proud or proficient in this game I can't indulge the amateur from time to time. 293 00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:19,116 So it keeps us on our toes. 294 00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:22,397 How are you faring with this little puzzle? 295 00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:25,279 - Well, I did notice... - Sergeant Richie. 296 00:31:25,440 --> 00:31:28,352 Get Bob to run a spectrograph on this. 297 00:31:28,520 --> 00:31:32,069 There's a suicide note that's been signed with a kiss. 298 00:31:32,240 --> 00:31:35,915 Put them together and the results are rather suggestive. 299 00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:41,313 I'm keen to hear what you make of the shortened lamp flex in the conservatory. 300 00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:43,755 - Lamp flex? 301 00:31:49,840 --> 00:31:54,197 It always reached before. I fail to see the rationale. 302 00:31:54,360 --> 00:31:57,750 Why cut the lead of a lamp down by six inches? 303 00:31:57,920 --> 00:32:02,630 - To... stop someone putting the light on in case they saw something they shouldn't? 304 00:32:05,600 --> 00:32:08,876 - You'd just take the fuse out of the plug. 305 00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:11,395 - Tiny detail, Mr Prekopp. 306 00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:16,111 You said you knocked on Miss Carney's door at 1.30 to ask about lunch 307 00:32:16,280 --> 00:32:19,590 and her response was, "I can't face anything now." 308 00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:22,672 - Correct. - Those were her exact words? 309 00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:25,673 - That is what she said. - Hmm. 310 00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:28,954 A couple of hours later, she's outside, 311 00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:34,319 having a barney with some phantom character who appears to be able to walk on air. 312 00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:38,029 Mr Illusionist? How do we explain that? 313 00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:44,392 If I weren't a rational man, I'd say there was devilry at work. 314 00:32:44,560 --> 00:32:49,315 A mystic who removes organs without leaving a mark on the body. 315 00:32:49,480 --> 00:32:53,598 Sleight of hand with a blood pellet and some pig's liver? No. 316 00:32:53,760 --> 00:32:57,878 No, I don't think it's him. Is it, Mr Prekopp? 317 00:33:01,400 --> 00:33:05,188 - I beg your pardon? - Back to base with him, Sergeant. 318 00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:10,912 Back to base? You're joking? What sort of lamebrain logic is this? 319 00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:14,072 Have you all gone stark raving mad? 320 00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:17,994 I can smell guilt on a man like dung on a donkey. 321 00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:20,674 How he did it will take some ferreting. 322 00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:24,879 Notice his slip? A dead woman can hardly call out from behind a door. 323 00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:27,679 - A dead woman? - Oh, yes. 324 00:33:27,840 --> 00:33:31,594 No sleep for the lab boys. How's your forensic pathology? 325 00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:33,910 Just read the last paragraph. 326 00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:38,596 She had a bullet in her, but also a bloodstream full of barbiturates. 327 00:33:38,760 --> 00:33:41,479 It's a biochemical certainty. 328 00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:45,872 Marella Carney had already departed this world by noon - 329 00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:48,429 four hours before she shot herself. 330 00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:53,071 If you can come up with a better trick than that, I'd like to see it. 331 00:34:21,400 --> 00:34:25,359 OK. Mr Lionel Lemuel Prekopp. 332 00:34:25,520 --> 00:34:30,230 - You've worked for this pair for 33 years? - Yes. 333 00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:34,234 - Originally as a dresser to Miss Carney. - Yes. 334 00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:37,949 - Then as a general assistant to them both. - Yes. 335 00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,156 Did you kill her? 336 00:34:41,840 --> 00:34:46,834 Marella Carney was the finest individual I was ever blessed to know. 337 00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:51,869 She illuminated the lives of millions with her grace and beauty. 338 00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:56,875 I loved, admired and respected her for what she was. 339 00:34:57,520 --> 00:35:02,548 - What she ever more will be. - You haven't answered my question. 340 00:35:04,040 --> 00:35:05,678 No. 341 00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:21,236 This is roughly where he'd have come out - our mysterious limping man. 342 00:35:22,040 --> 00:35:25,999 What do you think? Quick wander around? 343 00:35:26,160 --> 00:35:31,075 And look for what? It's nearly 24 hours later. There's been more snow. 344 00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:35,993 I know. It's hard to know where to start on this one. 345 00:35:36,160 --> 00:35:42,508 He was a bit of a star turn, wasn't he? The old Detective Inspector. 346 00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:46,958 I don't know. Perhaps you'd rather step aside this time. 347 00:35:47,120 --> 00:35:52,319 Just let him get on with it. He did seem more than capable. 348 00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:09,793 What's the betting on Lionel? He looked gobsmacked when she carted him off. 349 00:36:09,960 --> 00:36:15,830 Are we supposed to think he's an accomplice to a deliberately baffling suicide? 350 00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:19,993 - Hmm. "He" you mean. - Sorry? 351 00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:25,154 - When he carted him off. You said she. - Yeah. A woman. The Detective Sergeant. 352 00:36:25,320 --> 00:36:27,914 - You being funny? - What? 353 00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:30,071 - That was a man. - Bugger off! 354 00:36:30,240 --> 00:36:32,993 - It was. - Not in a month of Sundays. 355 00:36:33,160 --> 00:36:36,675 - All right. - How much? 356 00:36:38,200 --> 00:36:40,794 - Ten quid. - You're on. 357 00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:45,351 Now that the obligatory two hours of pointless suspense has elapsed, 358 00:36:45,520 --> 00:36:48,318 tell me about that business upstairs. 359 00:36:48,480 --> 00:36:49,959 Sorry? 360 00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:53,078 That little dot of blood on the wallpaper. 361 00:36:53,240 --> 00:36:57,233 Not everything that's red and sticky has to be blood. 362 00:36:57,400 --> 00:37:01,109 - Come again? - Who wore red nail varnish? 363 00:37:02,240 --> 00:37:06,119 - You saw the bottles on her dressing table. - OK. So? 364 00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:10,068 So Marella Carney - a lifelong claustrophobic... 365 00:37:10,240 --> 00:37:15,109 It was a joke in the trade. That's why her sister went in the trunks and boxes. 366 00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:17,953 ...has been travelling in a tiny lift. 367 00:37:18,120 --> 00:37:23,035 Maybe she's had hypnotherapy since then, but with the suicide note... 368 00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:26,078 - She just put a kiss. - Why didn't she sign it? 369 00:37:26,240 --> 00:37:30,392 Why didn't she put "Marella" or "Mother" at the bottom? 370 00:37:30,560 --> 00:37:36,669 Maybe because at the end of her life - the moment of final accountability - 371 00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:39,274 she couldn't bring herself to lie... 372 00:37:40,640 --> 00:37:43,200 about who she really was. 373 00:37:46,240 --> 00:37:49,835 Oh, you top man, Jonathan! 374 00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:54,479 It wasn't Beryl at the end of the saw, it was her sister. 375 00:37:54,640 --> 00:37:59,998 All these years, Marella Carney wasn't Marella Carney at all. 376 00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:06,675 - That explains everything. - No. It explains nothing. 377 00:38:06,840 --> 00:38:12,995 It doesn't explain how she was seen shooting herself when she was already dead. 378 00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:17,919 Or how a man can run away through four inches of snow 379 00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:21,197 and not have left a single footprint behind. 380 00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:29,750 Come on. No point freezing our bollocks off out here. 381 00:38:55,760 --> 00:38:58,638 Oh, hell's teeth! Look at this! 382 00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:10,391 - Not only bastards, but weird ones. - What is it? 383 00:39:10,560 --> 00:39:15,156 Left the radio and stereo and just taken the morning papers. 384 00:39:19,080 --> 00:39:23,073 - Morning. How's Jack the Ripper looking? - Don't ask. 385 00:39:28,280 --> 00:39:30,111 Jonathan, good morning. 386 00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:34,717 How are the trains? Still one or two frozen points, they said. 387 00:39:34,880 --> 00:39:40,352 Frozen? What in the name of hell is this? Am I in the right theatre? 388 00:39:40,520 --> 00:39:44,672 Hard to believe what a gifted designer can pull together. 389 00:39:44,840 --> 00:39:47,559 Elsa has surpassed herself. 390 00:39:47,720 --> 00:39:53,477 I try not to give you any old frog coat. Always for Adam something a bit special. 391 00:39:53,640 --> 00:39:55,278 Frog coat. 392 00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:58,557 The flippers are not restricting? Show me. 393 00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:05,717 Hey, listen. Almost like a floating sensation. 394 00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:10,788 Maybe a tuck in the throat. Let me get my pins. 395 00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:17,479 - Jonathan... - This is it, is it? 396 00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:24,079 Through the fog of Victorian London, a girl is slashed to ribbons by Toad of Toad Hall? 397 00:40:24,240 --> 00:40:27,118 What kind of cretins have you got here? 398 00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:29,714 We'll work around it. 399 00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:32,474 And if you value your position in my team, Jonathan, 400 00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:36,553 you'd be advised to moderate your language when referring to the future Mrs Klaus! 401 00:40:36,720 --> 00:40:39,598 Work round it? Are you mad? I just... 402 00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:42,869 What did you just say? 403 00:40:44,000 --> 00:40:49,996 (BOY) This man came running from over there. He slammed the door open and shouted, "R-rragh!" 404 00:40:56,040 --> 00:41:01,512 So the kids came to play in their den and found him inside, gnawing on a bone. 405 00:41:01,680 --> 00:41:05,719 He took one look at them and bolted down the lane. 406 00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:08,796 With a pronounced limp. 407 00:41:12,960 --> 00:41:14,439 Morning. 408 00:41:48,560 --> 00:41:51,028 Woodpecker, if I'm not mistaken. 409 00:41:54,320 --> 00:41:57,312 Here's one the tooth fairy missed. 410 00:41:58,440 --> 00:42:02,115 Pre-molar crown with a Maryland bridge. 411 00:42:02,960 --> 00:42:05,315 As individual as any fingerprint. 412 00:42:05,480 --> 00:42:09,996 Someone made this, and they'll have a record of who they made it for. 413 00:42:10,160 --> 00:42:12,913 A name, Sergeant. Don't spare the horses. 414 00:42:15,360 --> 00:42:18,238 There comes a point in your life 415 00:42:18,400 --> 00:42:24,589 when leaping into bed with every gorgeous girl seems suddenly... rather tawdry. 416 00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:27,797 You're looking for permanence. Commitment. 417 00:42:27,960 --> 00:42:34,035 Only you could marry a woman just to get your leg over and call it a learning curve! 418 00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:39,832 View it how you will. Her moral probity and purity of spirit have won my heart. 419 00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:44,949 Which prompts me to ask about how your reunion with Miss Carney went. 420 00:42:45,120 --> 00:42:50,956 Well... obviously she was in a bit of a state with everything that had happened. 421 00:42:51,120 --> 00:42:55,796 And highly vulnerable, so I hope you were there for her when she needed it. 422 00:42:56,480 --> 00:42:58,471 - Well, I... - (KNOCKING) 423 00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:02,918 Everyone decent? What a shame. How are the gallstones? 424 00:43:03,080 --> 00:43:06,550 Looking up, thanks. I've found a new specialist 425 00:43:06,720 --> 00:43:10,713 who's promised to keep me away from hospitals. 426 00:43:10,880 --> 00:43:13,235 You two off to the Canaries again? 427 00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:17,757 Yeah, but no rush. If you've got things to discuss, no sweat. 428 00:43:17,920 --> 00:43:20,912 I'll grab a coffee and wait in the car. 429 00:43:28,760 --> 00:43:33,231 - About Charlotte. You were saying? - Hang on a sec. 430 00:43:47,640 --> 00:43:49,437 Yeah, well... 431 00:43:49,600 --> 00:43:54,594 You can't make a move under those circumstances even if you wanted to. 432 00:43:56,080 --> 00:44:01,029 Meaning what? Because you haven't resolved this thing between you and? 433 00:44:01,200 --> 00:44:06,035 I don't know. I suppose Maddy's more like... 434 00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:13,150 You know a comfy old sweatshirt that you're happy to put on day after day? 435 00:44:13,320 --> 00:44:18,792 - Mmm. - It's not something you even think about. 436 00:44:38,720 --> 00:44:43,555 I guess we say nothing to Charlotte about your switcheroo theory. 437 00:44:43,720 --> 00:44:45,711 It'll do her head in. 438 00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:51,317 I'll be picking crumbs of glass out of here for ever more. 439 00:44:51,480 --> 00:44:55,189 150 quid for a new window's daylight robbery. 440 00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:57,828 - Do you want a coke? - Black coffee. 441 00:44:58,000 --> 00:44:59,479 OK. 442 00:45:32,360 --> 00:45:35,670 - Why did you just do that? - Sorry? 443 00:45:35,840 --> 00:45:39,913 - Lock your door when you saw me. - Er... 444 00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:45,313 "Here's an ugly pile of shit, I'd better lock my door in case he tries anything." 445 00:45:47,200 --> 00:45:53,639 I don't like the look of you either. Do you want to get out and discuss it? 446 00:45:55,160 --> 00:45:59,438 I said, do you want to get out and discuss it?! 447 00:45:59,600 --> 00:46:03,673 I said, do you want to get out and discuss it?! 448 00:46:07,040 --> 00:46:08,712 Get out, then! 449 00:46:20,200 --> 00:46:26,309 That's it. And very gently... out you come. 450 00:46:31,440 --> 00:46:34,716 - What's your game? - This. What's yours? Tiddlywinks? 451 00:46:34,880 --> 00:46:37,110 Piss off before I nick you. 452 00:46:46,680 --> 00:46:48,671 You've gotta be... 453 00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:50,751 Not again. 454 00:46:50,920 --> 00:46:56,392 So, Mr Creek, claustrophobic woman in lift, no signature on the suicide note. 455 00:46:56,560 --> 00:46:59,472 What do we think? Marella was really Beryl? 456 00:46:59,640 --> 00:47:04,077 Which may affect the motives if not the mechanics of this crime. 457 00:47:04,240 --> 00:47:08,279 - You think it was a crime? - These are murky waters. 458 00:47:08,440 --> 00:47:13,195 If I know anything about anything, Mr Prekopp's at the source of it. 459 00:47:13,360 --> 00:47:18,434 We've had to release him for now, but he'll give himself away some time. 460 00:47:18,600 --> 00:47:22,195 Oh, and a possible lead on the limping man. 461 00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:25,989 Been squatting in some kiddies' den in the woods. 462 00:47:26,160 --> 00:47:30,631 A bit of detective work, we should have a name in a day or two. 463 00:47:53,440 --> 00:47:55,431 - What? - I'm telling you. 464 00:47:59,840 --> 00:48:02,832 You've got half a windscreen down there. 465 00:48:03,000 --> 00:48:06,151 Where are you now? City University? 466 00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:09,630 Doing a postgraduate degree course in cytology. 467 00:48:09,800 --> 00:48:14,351 Staring down microscopes, basically. Till I find a teaching job some... 468 00:48:14,520 --> 00:48:19,640 - Hold still, there's some more bits. - It's amazing where they get to. 469 00:48:19,800 --> 00:48:24,351 Just tip him upside down over the sink. It's what I do with my toaster. 470 00:48:24,520 --> 00:48:26,317 (GUNSHOT) 471 00:48:26,480 --> 00:48:28,869 What in hell's name? 472 00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:32,396 It's OK. It's just Father firing off a few rounds. 473 00:48:33,360 --> 00:48:37,069 I thought he'd have had enough of guns. Find something to do. 474 00:48:37,240 --> 00:48:40,357 It's displacement activity, I suppose. 475 00:48:54,760 --> 00:48:57,638 I think you said something about scrapbooks. 476 00:48:59,960 --> 00:49:02,349 - Jonathan? - Oh. 477 00:49:02,520 --> 00:49:07,196 Yeah. Those press cuttings of your mother's upstairs. 478 00:49:07,360 --> 00:49:11,035 Sometimes these things can spark a thought. 479 00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:13,998 Of course. You know your way around. 480 00:49:18,480 --> 00:49:21,438 You've known him quite a few years now? 481 00:49:22,840 --> 00:49:26,196 There was a time once, I thought... 482 00:49:28,680 --> 00:49:31,797 "Definitely. It's going to happen." 483 00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:35,839 We'd had this really fantastic evening together. 484 00:49:36,000 --> 00:49:39,356 You know when you get a feeling about someone? 485 00:49:39,520 --> 00:49:43,593 I virtually offered myself to him on a plate that night... 486 00:49:44,960 --> 00:49:50,239 but then, for whatever reason, he just made a polite excuse and... 487 00:49:52,200 --> 00:49:56,716 - There you go. I suppose I wasn't his type. - I suppose. 488 00:49:56,880 --> 00:50:00,429 Charlotte, a couple more points. Do you mind? 489 00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:41,551 # Darling be tender 490 00:50:42,600 --> 00:50:47,754 # Tender to this poor guy 491 00:50:47,920 --> 00:50:51,276 # A love that will never end 492 00:50:51,440 --> 00:50:58,630 # A love that can never die... # 493 00:50:58,800 --> 00:51:04,875 This was at number 23 in the hit parade... the day we first met. 494 00:51:06,280 --> 00:51:11,434 People, whenever they hear it... say it makes them want to weep. 495 00:51:11,600 --> 00:51:15,673 Yes. Take it off, would you? It's upsetting me. 496 00:51:20,320 --> 00:51:23,835 Charlotte, that pot of Earl Grey you mentioned... 497 00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:26,958 Oh. Sorry. I'll get the kettle on. 498 00:51:30,440 --> 00:51:33,432 - Mr Bellinitus, I wonder... - What's that? 499 00:51:34,200 --> 00:51:38,591 Sorry. This has nothing to do with your wife's death but... 500 00:51:38,760 --> 00:51:40,796 Would you do me a favour? 501 00:52:12,600 --> 00:52:15,319 "I suppose Maddy's more like..." 502 00:52:16,320 --> 00:52:19,869 - It looks like "comfy old sweatshirt"? - Go on. 503 00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:23,430 "...that you're happy to keep putting on day after day." 504 00:52:24,720 --> 00:52:28,110 Thanks. That's been educational. 505 00:52:31,760 --> 00:52:36,470 Hello. He's got that look we all know and love. What have you found? 506 00:52:36,640 --> 00:52:40,792 Enough to suggest that someone's done something amazingly clever 507 00:52:40,960 --> 00:52:44,077 but, at the same time, unutterably stupid. 508 00:52:44,240 --> 00:52:47,357 Mr Bellinitus, the man you saw in the garden, 509 00:52:47,520 --> 00:52:50,512 when he ran away, which leg did he limp on? 510 00:52:50,680 --> 00:52:52,477 I think... 511 00:52:53,240 --> 00:52:55,993 Yes. He was dragging the left leg. 512 00:52:56,160 --> 00:52:59,197 - With the weight on the right. - That tells us what? 513 00:52:59,360 --> 00:53:02,989 Nothing yet, but it could tell us everything. 514 00:53:07,120 --> 00:53:08,599 Tea. 515 00:53:23,160 --> 00:53:26,550 I wonder whether we're going too deep here. 516 00:53:27,640 --> 00:53:32,873 Whether this whole thing isn't just a pack of lies dreamed up by Mr Bellinitus. 517 00:53:34,680 --> 00:53:39,879 Can you take the word of a man named after an inflammation of the foreskin? 518 00:53:40,040 --> 00:53:45,558 But then why invent a story that's so ridiculous, no one's going to believe it? 519 00:54:00,000 --> 00:54:02,036 The lamp. 520 00:54:06,680 --> 00:54:10,798 Sometimes, Sergeant, I can be such a ninny. 521 00:54:12,320 --> 00:54:17,394 OK. Thanks for all your help again. We'll be back in touch before the... 522 00:54:18,960 --> 00:54:21,269 What was that? A bat? 523 00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:25,115 That's the second one. Why are they out in January? 524 00:54:26,000 --> 00:54:30,232 I've had a thought. Why don't I run Jonathan home? 525 00:54:30,400 --> 00:54:32,834 - It'll only take 40 minutes. - You reckon? 526 00:54:33,000 --> 00:54:36,470 - Save you going to Timbuktu and back. - Right. 527 00:54:37,560 --> 00:54:40,120 - Thanks, - I'll get my coat. 528 00:55:12,160 --> 00:55:14,151 Aagh! 529 00:55:36,320 --> 00:55:38,550 Two hours, 37. 530 00:55:39,960 --> 00:55:43,839 Take off 1.56 for dinner at the pub. 531 00:55:44,720 --> 00:55:48,395 That's exactly 41 minutes. You're slipping. 532 00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:55,437 Yes, this is all very Jonathan. 533 00:55:56,480 --> 00:55:59,392 Decor, I'm guessing, Victoriana? 534 00:56:01,120 --> 00:56:04,112 With posters of Maskelyne and Cook on the walls. 535 00:56:04,280 --> 00:56:06,350 Yeah. 536 00:56:09,720 --> 00:56:13,190 - Maybe some other time. - Beg your pardon? 537 00:56:20,720 --> 00:56:24,793 Sorry, Jonathan. Could I scrounge a bed for the night? 538 00:56:26,720 --> 00:56:29,188 (BANGING AND CRASHING) 539 00:56:35,040 --> 00:56:41,115 It's bad enough I've got the seven plagues of Egypt without you giving me a hard time! 540 00:56:41,280 --> 00:56:44,352 I thought I could be useful here tonight. 541 00:56:44,520 --> 00:56:46,715 What as? A contraceptive? 542 00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:51,158 As a sounding board - in case you want to discuss stuff. 543 00:56:51,320 --> 00:56:54,392 I suppose you'd have got into bed and been eaten alive! 544 00:56:54,560 --> 00:56:58,633 Chance would be a fine thing! Talk about a winning line on the lottery. 545 00:56:58,800 --> 00:57:02,793 There's skid marks out there where she left! What are you like?! 546 00:57:02,960 --> 00:57:05,315 I don't know, Jonathan, what am I like?! 547 00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:10,235 A comfy old sweatshirt you're happy to keep putting on day after day? 548 00:57:10,400 --> 00:57:13,756 Or a pair of underpants you can't be bothered to change? 549 00:57:16,560 --> 00:57:18,596 How did you? 550 00:57:21,040 --> 00:57:23,235 Baffling, isn't it? 551 00:57:23,400 --> 00:57:27,791 Now I've got your attention, tell me what you found in that scrapbook 552 00:57:27,960 --> 00:57:30,269 that put a spring in your step. 553 00:57:32,680 --> 00:57:35,478 It may have been nothing. I don't know. 554 00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:41,238 A magazine piece about 16 years ago. 555 00:57:41,400 --> 00:57:44,472 Guy went round to her house to do an interview 556 00:57:44,640 --> 00:57:47,313 and was treated to an impromptu illusion 557 00:57:47,480 --> 00:57:51,234 in which Miss Carney turned a Rolls Royce into a Porsche. 558 00:57:51,400 --> 00:57:53,038 So? 559 00:57:55,760 --> 00:58:00,515 There's the shape of something that's breathtakingly impressive but... 560 00:58:00,680 --> 00:58:02,830 I need to sit down with it for a while. 561 00:58:03,000 --> 00:58:06,629 So our current thinking is what? 562 00:58:06,800 --> 00:58:10,554 It was premeditated? A murder made to look like a suicide? 563 00:58:10,720 --> 00:58:14,076 Or a suicide made to look like a suicide. 564 00:58:14,240 --> 00:58:15,719 What? 565 00:58:15,880 --> 00:58:19,873 If you stop and think about the footprints - 566 00:58:20,040 --> 00:58:23,555 there was only one set going up to the body. 567 00:58:23,720 --> 00:58:29,317 But what's to stop someone carefully walking back the same way? Retracing their steps? 568 00:58:29,480 --> 00:58:34,031 Nothing, but that's not what he said. The guy ran into the woods. 569 00:58:34,200 --> 00:58:39,274 And there wasn't time. His eyes never left her from the moment she shot herself. 570 00:58:39,440 --> 00:58:42,159 All right. How do we confirm her identity? 571 00:58:42,320 --> 00:58:46,472 It'd help if we knew where Hannah and her friend had gone. 572 00:58:46,640 --> 00:58:51,634 Probably found some gullible character who's got more money than sense... 573 00:58:56,840 --> 00:59:02,312 Terrific new specialist who'll keep him away from hospitals. No. Even he wouldn't... 574 00:59:02,480 --> 00:59:05,278 What? Who are we talking about now? 575 00:59:06,640 --> 00:59:12,033 It's Sunday night. There's no show. I wonder if they do house calls. 576 00:59:34,560 --> 00:59:36,551 Can anyone join in? 577 00:59:36,720 --> 00:59:39,632 - What the hell? - Adam, you of all people. 578 00:59:39,800 --> 00:59:44,271 Mr Lao, we've heard so much about you. We had to come and see. 579 00:59:48,360 --> 00:59:51,716 Wow. Clock that, Adam. 580 00:59:51,880 --> 00:59:56,715 Whipped out your gallstones before he's touched you. How do you do it? 581 00:59:56,880 --> 01:00:02,238 Sorry, Hannah. We were rather anxious to catch up with you. 582 01:00:02,400 --> 01:00:05,392 For a word about the death of Marella Carney. 583 01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:11,237 My God. You hadn't heard? 584 01:00:12,480 --> 01:00:15,472 They read about my condition, gave me a call... 585 01:00:15,640 --> 01:00:19,952 There are many facets to science we don't fully comprehend. 586 01:00:20,120 --> 01:00:23,112 I keep an open mind. Does that make me stupid? 587 01:00:25,200 --> 01:00:27,191 I'll be in my room. 588 01:00:28,760 --> 01:00:34,278 Setting aside your scheme of taking shallow showbusiness types to the cleaners, 589 01:00:34,440 --> 01:00:38,274 what happened that night between you and your mother? 590 01:00:38,440 --> 01:00:41,671 We are talking about your mother, aren't we? 591 01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:48,830 You say taking them to the cleaners, but there's a life-affirming role to our work. 592 01:00:49,000 --> 01:00:53,551 - If a patient believes he is cured... - You can skip the sales talk. 593 01:00:53,720 --> 01:00:56,917 There was a profit motive to your visit. 594 01:00:57,080 --> 01:01:01,471 Starting with going to see Auntie Marella and Uncle Jerry. 595 01:01:01,640 --> 01:01:05,997 Only, when you got there, it wasn't Auntie Marella that you saw. 596 01:01:08,360 --> 01:01:11,875 She fooled the rest of the world for 15 years. 597 01:01:14,920 --> 01:01:17,878 She knew it wouldn't take me 15 seconds. 598 01:01:25,880 --> 01:01:30,874 You can't describe what goes through your head at a moment like that. 599 01:01:32,440 --> 01:01:33,919 Joy? 600 01:01:35,280 --> 01:01:40,400 My mother had just come back from the dead. Joy would have been good. 601 01:01:42,000 --> 01:01:43,991 But I didn't feel joy. 602 01:01:44,160 --> 01:01:45,479 Hannah? 603 01:01:45,640 --> 01:01:47,835 I felt... Maybe this is weird. 604 01:01:48,000 --> 01:01:49,479 I'm sorry. 605 01:01:49,640 --> 01:01:52,154 Maybe it isn't... cheated. 606 01:01:52,320 --> 01:01:54,311 Why in the name of God? 607 01:01:54,480 --> 01:02:01,397 How dare she put me through the wringer? Deny me her own existence all those years. 608 01:02:03,040 --> 01:02:08,717 Oh, if you'd been there. What else was I going to do? 609 01:02:08,880 --> 01:02:12,589 That's when she took me back to that morning. 610 01:02:12,760 --> 01:02:15,558 The saw was real enough. 611 01:02:15,720 --> 01:02:20,191 The trick relied upon a false blade taking over when it hit the harness, 612 01:02:20,360 --> 01:02:24,592 but for whatever reason, that's not the way it happened. 613 01:03:10,840 --> 01:03:14,799 For a minute, I couldn't speak... hear... 614 01:03:16,560 --> 01:03:18,630 feel. 615 01:03:21,840 --> 01:03:25,355 And then, through that explosion of horror... 616 01:03:28,640 --> 01:03:31,359 I saw the horror that was still to come. 617 01:03:38,920 --> 01:03:42,959 I had half a minute to make a decision that would last a lifetime. 618 01:03:49,120 --> 01:03:53,159 I had the power to make her mother survive. 619 01:04:07,160 --> 01:04:09,720 Was that so wrong? 620 01:04:09,880 --> 01:04:13,031 To restore that life to them. 621 01:04:13,200 --> 01:04:16,556 - You didn't think of me. - You gave me no reason to... 622 01:04:16,720 --> 01:04:19,109 - The life that I'd lose. - Where were you? 623 01:04:19,280 --> 01:04:22,795 Floating down a river with a needle in your arm! 624 01:04:22,960 --> 01:04:26,077 - But I might grow up! - I didn't know I still had you. 625 01:04:26,240 --> 01:04:30,199 - And you wouldn't be there. - All you can do is hate me. 626 01:04:30,360 --> 01:04:34,558 For what you did... you can rot in hell. 627 01:04:36,880 --> 01:04:38,359 Hannah! 628 01:04:39,240 --> 01:04:40,958 Please... 629 01:04:43,560 --> 01:04:47,030 Next day, I had to put some distance between us. 630 01:04:48,160 --> 01:04:50,628 Try and get my head round it all. 631 01:04:52,360 --> 01:04:54,874 Now you're saying she's dead? 632 01:04:58,560 --> 01:05:01,552 I'm sorry if I can't... 633 01:05:03,680 --> 01:05:06,478 You see, to me she was never alive. 634 01:05:18,000 --> 01:05:20,639 (DOG BARKING) 635 01:05:24,200 --> 01:05:29,115 I feel like I'm getting snow blindness on this. Where do we go from here? 636 01:05:29,280 --> 01:05:31,840 That's a very good question... 637 01:05:32,840 --> 01:05:37,755 which I suspect can only be answered by someone from the Wildlife Trust. 638 01:05:37,920 --> 01:05:42,789 - Give me that again. - Why were there bats flying in winter? 639 01:05:45,160 --> 01:05:48,630 When this is all over, I'm going to open a sweet shop. 640 01:05:48,800 --> 01:05:54,397 With big jars of humbugs and barley sugars. It's got to be an easier life. 641 01:05:55,480 --> 01:05:57,994 What is a hibernaculum anyway? 642 01:05:58,160 --> 01:06:00,549 It's a place where animals hibernate. 643 01:06:00,720 --> 01:06:06,829 In this case, a disused water reservoir which, if the directions are correct... 644 01:06:08,800 --> 01:06:10,279 Yup. 645 01:06:16,360 --> 01:06:22,993 Something or someone disturbed those bats and drove them out of their hidey hole. 646 01:06:23,160 --> 01:06:26,914 Someone who was driven out of his own hidey hole earlier on. 647 01:07:29,840 --> 01:07:32,308 (BOTTLE CLINKS) 648 01:08:08,880 --> 01:08:11,474 Point me to the sherbet lemons! 649 01:08:11,640 --> 01:08:14,677 Thank you for letting me share that experience, 650 01:08:14,840 --> 01:08:18,389 which has not advanced our cause one iota. 651 01:08:20,360 --> 01:08:22,669 Quite the reverse, in fact. 652 01:08:22,840 --> 01:08:26,549 We've just found out how the entire illusion was worked. 653 01:08:34,080 --> 01:08:36,913 Didn't you see which leg he was limping on? 654 01:09:16,320 --> 01:09:19,710 - E-mail from Guildford, sir. - Where? 655 01:09:19,880 --> 01:09:22,474 Where? Where? Where? Yes. 656 01:09:23,880 --> 01:09:26,713 ID trace on tooth crown. Here we go. 657 01:09:27,800 --> 01:09:33,796 Shows what can be achieved with resources and legwork. "Re above inquiry. 658 01:09:33,960 --> 01:09:37,191 "Have successfully managed to identify..." Got him. 659 01:09:37,360 --> 01:09:42,912 The most elusive and significant figure in this entire cockeyed affair. 660 01:09:43,080 --> 01:09:45,071 And his name is... 661 01:09:50,040 --> 01:09:53,635 It's fair to say I wasn't expecting that. 662 01:09:53,800 --> 01:09:55,552 (KNOCKING) 663 01:09:55,720 --> 01:09:59,156 - Sorry, Inspector... - No, no. Come in. 664 01:09:59,320 --> 01:10:03,313 - This is very fortuitous. - We've made a breakthrough. 665 01:10:03,480 --> 01:10:05,948 Isn't it great when that happens? 666 01:10:06,120 --> 01:10:09,908 Our lead on the limping man appears to have paid off. 667 01:10:10,080 --> 01:10:12,719 - We know his name. - You're kidding? 668 01:10:22,040 --> 01:10:24,031 Is this a joke? 669 01:10:28,080 --> 01:10:32,153 No. I can't hear anyone laughing. I assume I'm serious. 670 01:10:34,120 --> 01:10:35,599 Please. 671 01:10:41,000 --> 01:10:45,232 The results suggest you are the owner of this crown, 672 01:10:45,400 --> 01:10:48,039 found on the floor of that kiddies' den. 673 01:10:49,040 --> 01:10:52,350 Yeah. Well... they would do. 674 01:10:54,600 --> 01:11:00,516 You know when you gave me that toffee in the car? One bite lifted it clean out. 675 01:11:00,680 --> 01:11:05,151 I stuck it in a matchbox and I thought I'd put it in my pocket. 676 01:11:06,320 --> 01:11:10,154 When the guy broke in, he must have taken that 677 01:11:10,320 --> 01:11:13,118 and then found there were no matches in it. 678 01:11:14,080 --> 01:11:16,071 Sorry about that. 679 01:11:16,240 --> 01:11:20,358 Could have saved your guys a lot of trouble... probably. 680 01:11:21,760 --> 01:11:23,591 Probably. 681 01:11:25,800 --> 01:11:30,271 We'll have to open up a second front on this gentleman. 682 01:11:30,440 --> 01:11:33,477 Actually, I don't think that'll be necessary. 683 01:11:34,640 --> 01:11:36,995 You're on the level about this. 684 01:11:38,080 --> 01:11:40,071 Just popping to the loo. 685 01:11:41,360 --> 01:11:43,396 OK. What you got? 686 01:11:49,800 --> 01:11:51,119 Hello? 687 01:12:12,760 --> 01:12:15,274 (FAINT VOICES) 688 01:12:16,600 --> 01:12:19,637 - What are you trying to say? - It's the truth. 689 01:12:19,800 --> 01:12:24,112 You're lying. You spend your life lying to people! 690 01:12:24,280 --> 01:12:28,478 You lied before. You lied to my father. You're lying to me now! 691 01:12:28,640 --> 01:12:32,349 - It's the truth. I'm sorry if it hurts. - Hurts?! 692 01:12:32,520 --> 01:12:37,116 You're asking me to believe that half my life never existed! Wasn't real! 693 01:12:37,280 --> 01:12:39,714 Ever since I was 12! 694 01:12:41,320 --> 01:12:42,799 No. 695 01:12:43,680 --> 01:12:47,878 You can't take her away from me like that. I'm sorry, no! 696 01:12:48,040 --> 01:12:52,795 In death, at least, I think I have a right to reclaim my own mother. 697 01:13:17,720 --> 01:13:21,474 If you'd like to come and wait, I think he's upstairs. 698 01:13:21,640 --> 01:13:24,916 Jerry! Pro-am detective time. 699 01:13:25,080 --> 01:13:30,074 Charlotte I'm not sure about. You haven't seen her on your travels? 700 01:13:30,240 --> 01:13:34,358 She's in the back garden... collecting her thoughts. 701 01:13:36,040 --> 01:13:38,918 We're leaving. I've said all I came to say. 702 01:13:39,080 --> 01:13:43,915 You might be interested in what we've got to say if you can hang on. 703 01:13:50,320 --> 01:13:52,311 - Something's wrong. - Sorry? 704 01:13:52,480 --> 01:13:54,471 I've just got a feeling. 705 01:14:45,520 --> 01:14:47,670 Somebody do something! 706 01:14:55,720 --> 01:14:59,633 I suppose it's part of the ritual. We all have to sit through this? 707 01:15:00,880 --> 01:15:03,838 My daughter should be in hospital. 708 01:15:04,000 --> 01:15:06,230 I just... 709 01:15:08,800 --> 01:15:12,395 It was like... what's the point anymore... 710 01:15:13,160 --> 01:15:15,151 after that... 711 01:15:17,360 --> 01:15:19,669 of going on? 712 01:15:23,720 --> 01:15:27,190 There's a lot for people to come to terms with here. 713 01:15:27,360 --> 01:15:31,558 A woman who for 15 years took on her sister's role as wife and mother. 714 01:15:32,560 --> 01:15:36,348 Became that wife and mother for all practical purposes. 715 01:15:36,520 --> 01:15:39,432 Did it matter what name she was born with? 716 01:15:40,560 --> 01:15:46,351 Evidently, to one person in this room, it mattered enough to murder. 717 01:15:48,880 --> 01:15:54,318 But how do you kill someone so it looks as if they'd done it themself? 718 01:15:54,480 --> 01:15:56,550 Not once, but twice. 719 01:15:56,720 --> 01:16:00,998 First in the morning with an overdose, then at 4 p.m. With a rifle. 720 01:16:01,160 --> 01:16:04,391 And more bafflingly, why? 721 01:16:05,200 --> 01:16:09,990 And what do we make of this mystery fellow - this limping man? 722 01:16:10,160 --> 01:16:14,711 The last person, apparently, to speak to her before she died. 723 01:16:14,880 --> 01:16:17,872 As it turns out, not a lot. 724 01:16:19,520 --> 01:16:25,755 He was just some bloke living rough, with a nervous disposition and a dodgy leg. 725 01:16:25,920 --> 01:16:28,388 A man who had nothing to do with anything, 726 01:16:28,560 --> 01:16:32,109 but without whom we'd never have solved this case. 727 01:16:32,280 --> 01:16:37,912 Yes, of all the details, the dodgy leg was the clincher. 728 01:16:38,080 --> 01:16:42,073 Just slightly ahead of that lamp in the conservatory. 729 01:16:42,240 --> 01:16:45,835 The flex hadn't been shortened at all. 730 01:16:46,000 --> 01:16:49,356 The table had been moved further away. 731 01:16:50,040 --> 01:16:54,830 That much I'd fathomed, though why was still beyond me. 732 01:16:59,200 --> 01:17:01,668 No such thing as magic. 733 01:17:01,840 --> 01:17:07,472 It's hard to hang onto that with this kind of stuff, even when you know it's a lie. 734 01:17:08,400 --> 01:17:11,995 No one can perform invisible surgery with their hands. 735 01:17:12,160 --> 01:17:15,914 No one can put a gun in their mouth when they're already dead. 736 01:17:16,080 --> 01:17:21,438 And no one can run through four inches of snow without leaving any marks. 737 01:17:21,600 --> 01:17:26,549 Then you realise we've been coming at it from the wrong angle. 738 01:17:26,720 --> 01:17:30,429 The question's not, why weren't there any footprints? 739 01:17:30,600 --> 01:17:33,273 But why couldn't you see them? 740 01:17:33,440 --> 01:17:36,910 Answer - you weren't looking in the right place. 741 01:17:46,240 --> 01:17:52,554 That trick with the car, performed for the benefit of a journalist and his readers, 742 01:17:52,720 --> 01:17:55,154 had an echo of something. 743 01:17:56,200 --> 01:18:01,991 The way he described it, she sat him in the conservatory, Roller outside the window, 744 01:18:02,160 --> 01:18:06,517 flipped some blinds about, it's turned into a Porsche. 745 01:18:10,640 --> 01:18:16,988 There's two or three ways to do that, but for speed only one that made any sense. 746 01:18:17,160 --> 01:18:19,310 Once you've got the key to it - 747 01:18:19,480 --> 01:18:23,758 that you're not looking through a pane of glass but at a mirror, 748 01:18:23,920 --> 01:18:27,754 reflecting a different part of the garden entirely - 749 01:18:27,920 --> 01:18:29,831 all things are possible. 750 01:18:30,000 --> 01:18:35,996 Look at the almost perfect symmetry of the grounds. It must have worked a treat. 751 01:18:36,160 --> 01:18:40,233 The observer has to be carefully placed for the eye line, 752 01:18:40,400 --> 01:18:45,235 hence the hastily moved chair and table and the lamp that didn't reach the socket. 753 01:18:45,400 --> 01:18:50,349 That could have been sorted, but the killer had only dreamed it up the night before. 754 01:18:50,520 --> 01:18:54,752 I had the power to make her mother survive. 755 01:18:54,920 --> 01:18:57,878 - You didn't think of me. - You gave me no reason... 756 01:18:58,040 --> 01:19:00,918 - The life I would lose. - Where were you? 757 01:19:01,080 --> 01:19:04,868 Floating down a river with a needle in your arm! 758 01:19:21,760 --> 01:19:27,392 You can trash me from here to eternity, but you can't nail me for her death. 759 01:19:27,560 --> 01:19:30,518 Not now. Not ever. 760 01:19:30,680 --> 01:19:34,719 But I think we can pin a motive on you, Mr Prekopp. 761 01:19:34,880 --> 01:19:39,317 When you learnt the truth, it went down like a cup of cold sick. 762 01:19:39,480 --> 01:19:44,395 The truth? Well, of course, one had always suspected. 763 01:19:44,560 --> 01:19:47,028 Many times over the years. 764 01:19:47,720 --> 01:19:52,396 But still, the shock of hearing it confirmed. 765 01:19:55,960 --> 01:19:58,713 Hearing the tears and the histrionics. 766 01:19:58,880 --> 01:20:02,714 How the decision had been forced on her. 767 01:20:02,880 --> 01:20:05,838 If you believe that, you'll believe anything. 768 01:20:10,680 --> 01:20:15,231 Look at what she had to gain and tell me that was an accident. 769 01:20:15,400 --> 01:20:21,919 Her life was a mess. Her marriage was a Greek tragedy. She'd lost her only daughter. 770 01:20:22,080 --> 01:20:24,719 You can't seriously suggest? 771 01:20:25,680 --> 01:20:28,956 What you're saying is just... pure evil. 772 01:20:29,120 --> 01:20:33,989 Because you were blinded by her love - for you, for Charlotte. 773 01:20:35,080 --> 01:20:37,958 Don't you see that was the secret to it? 774 01:20:38,120 --> 01:20:41,317 That was the whole reason for it. 775 01:20:42,040 --> 01:20:44,838 Whatever the truth, you'd decided. 776 01:20:45,000 --> 01:20:48,231 Marella was murdered and it was time for justice. 777 01:20:48,400 --> 01:20:52,075 When you remembered that mirror trick, it all fell into place. 778 01:20:52,240 --> 01:20:57,473 The notion of using one of her own props against her seemed... 779 01:20:58,960 --> 01:21:01,110 deliciously apt. 780 01:21:04,800 --> 01:21:08,031 (JONATHAN) So you dig it out and install it. 781 01:21:13,800 --> 01:21:16,553 A little adjustment with the chair. 782 01:21:23,480 --> 01:21:26,950 Using one of Jerry's guns, you perform the deed. 783 01:21:32,480 --> 01:21:35,790 Sort out a couple of coats that are a close match - 784 01:21:35,960 --> 01:21:38,394 one for her, one for you. 785 01:21:56,840 --> 01:22:00,435 Alarm all set should you nod off, OK? 786 01:22:00,600 --> 01:22:04,195 I'm off to the woodshed to do some whittling. 787 01:22:05,200 --> 01:22:08,590 The body's safely masked behind the mirror. 788 01:22:12,120 --> 01:22:14,395 At four, when Jerry wakes up, 789 01:22:14,560 --> 01:22:18,872 what he'll see is a distant hooded figure - yourself... 790 01:22:19,760 --> 01:22:22,593 clearly taking her own life with a rifle. 791 01:22:22,760 --> 01:22:25,194 He'll dash off to get help, 792 01:22:25,360 --> 01:22:29,558 during which you're back into the house to remove the evidence. 793 01:22:29,720 --> 01:22:33,713 Only now came the first of several unforeseen screw-ups. 794 01:22:36,960 --> 01:22:39,918 Couple of minutes to four, the hobo appears... 795 01:22:40,080 --> 01:22:41,672 What are you doing? 796 01:22:41,840 --> 01:22:45,116 ... trying to cadge a couple of quid or something, 797 01:22:45,280 --> 01:22:47,589 and has to be scared off sharpish. 798 01:22:48,760 --> 01:22:52,116 Get out! Go! Quickly. 799 01:22:55,000 --> 01:22:57,912 But with luck, he didn't see him. 800 01:22:58,080 --> 01:23:00,435 Your alarm hasn't gone off yet. 801 01:23:00,600 --> 01:23:03,433 The act proceeds as planned. 802 01:23:04,840 --> 01:23:06,353 (GUNSHOT) 803 01:23:06,520 --> 01:23:08,431 No! 804 01:23:09,440 --> 01:23:10,919 Oh... 805 01:23:11,880 --> 01:23:16,192 Instead of disappearing back into the house, he goes outside. 806 01:23:16,360 --> 01:23:20,751 The guy can hardly walk. That wasn't meant to happen either. 807 01:23:20,920 --> 01:23:24,151 Still, he doesn't think to look behind him. 808 01:23:24,320 --> 01:23:29,348 Even if he did, what's he going to make of footprints on the other side of the garden? 809 01:23:39,720 --> 01:23:43,838 You manage to get round in time anyway. The mirror's removed 810 01:23:44,000 --> 01:23:47,515 and, helpfully, it's starting to snow again. 811 01:23:48,280 --> 01:23:50,077 Jerry! 812 01:23:51,280 --> 01:23:53,271 You think you've pulled it off. 813 01:23:53,440 --> 01:23:58,036 She's been seen committing suicide. You've got away with murder. 814 01:23:58,200 --> 01:24:01,795 Then that one detail you could have done without. 815 01:24:02,680 --> 01:24:07,037 You found out that your victim had already killed herself. 816 01:24:08,000 --> 01:24:14,155 Not the first thing to cross your mind when you went in and she was taking a nap - 817 01:24:15,160 --> 01:24:18,630 that the woman lying there was already dead. 818 01:24:23,200 --> 01:24:25,191 (GUNSHOT) 819 01:24:28,800 --> 01:24:31,997 What kind of guilt was it in the end... 820 01:24:32,880 --> 01:24:34,871 drove her to it? 821 01:24:36,720 --> 01:24:40,110 The shame of what she'd done to her daughter? 822 01:24:41,480 --> 01:24:44,916 Or what she'd done to her sister? 823 01:24:47,520 --> 01:24:50,990 What did she really want us to forgive her for? 824 01:24:56,640 --> 01:24:58,790 Any time, pop in for a cuppa. 825 01:24:59,680 --> 01:25:02,478 I'll be haunted forever now by limping men. 826 01:25:02,640 --> 01:25:07,555 I knew it would seal it. If he was limping on the right leg when we saw him 827 01:25:07,720 --> 01:25:10,712 and on the left leg before, it was a reflection. 828 01:25:10,880 --> 01:25:14,873 Though you'd sniffed him out from the off. Well done. 829 01:25:15,040 --> 01:25:18,271 Her calling through the door when she was dead. 830 01:25:18,440 --> 01:25:21,557 Like I said, like dung on a donkey. 831 01:25:21,720 --> 01:25:26,635 - What are you going to charge him with? - Possession of an offensive haircut? 832 01:25:26,800 --> 01:25:28,791 We'll think of something. 833 01:25:31,240 --> 01:25:33,913 Look after yourselves. 834 01:25:42,800 --> 01:25:44,791 - All right. - Go on. 835 01:25:44,960 --> 01:25:47,110 - What? - Adam's apple. 836 01:25:47,280 --> 01:25:50,636 - She was swallowing. - Don't be ridiculous. 837 01:25:50,800 --> 01:25:55,157 - I can see it now. It's as plain as day. - 20 quid says you're wrong. 838 01:25:55,320 --> 01:25:57,550 - All right. - (MOBILE RINGS) 839 01:25:59,080 --> 01:26:01,071 Jonathan Creek. 840 01:26:04,000 --> 01:26:07,310 Oh, you are joking? You've got to be... 841 01:26:09,560 --> 01:26:10,879 What? 842 01:26:11,040 --> 01:26:14,077 - Adam has been rushed to hospital. - Gallstones? 843 01:26:14,240 --> 01:26:18,153 His bride-to-be tried to beat him to death with a poker. 844 01:26:19,600 --> 01:26:23,195 I never learned, Jonathan, to read those signs. 845 01:26:23,360 --> 01:26:26,955 - What happened? - Our first prenuptial adventure. 846 01:26:27,120 --> 01:26:32,069 She steps out of the shower, naked before me, and suddenly... 847 01:26:32,240 --> 01:26:33,992 know what I'm staring at? 848 01:26:34,160 --> 01:26:36,390 We've got a shrewd idea. 849 01:26:36,560 --> 01:26:41,270 To find threaded through an intimate area of your fiancée's body a ring... 850 01:26:41,440 --> 01:26:43,510 is challenging enough... 851 01:26:43,680 --> 01:26:49,471 To find threaded upon that ring a small nickel-plated swastika... 852 01:26:50,720 --> 01:26:54,235 - takes me somewhere I don't want to go. - You're joking? 853 01:26:54,400 --> 01:26:59,428 The blonde blue-eyed Elsa was of more conservative stock than I'd imagined. 854 01:27:01,240 --> 01:27:03,231 A Nazi. 855 01:27:04,000 --> 01:27:08,471 And suddenly, all those black shirts were making sense. 856 01:27:08,640 --> 01:27:14,431 At that point, things got ugly. Anti-fascist polemic does not make for great foreplay. 857 01:27:14,600 --> 01:27:17,512 She began beating me with fireside equipment. 858 01:27:17,680 --> 01:27:21,116 - We'd better make a move... - Okey-dokey, Mr Klaus. 859 01:27:21,280 --> 01:27:24,477 Is this a conjuring trick that went wrong? 860 01:27:24,640 --> 01:27:28,952 You stick swords into young ladies, they're bound to turn nasty. 861 01:27:29,120 --> 01:27:34,478 We could strap him down. These magicians might start flying around the room. 862 01:27:34,640 --> 01:27:38,474 Now, then... Got some gallstones as well, I see. 863 01:27:39,400 --> 01:27:41,994 You'll be with us for a day or two. 864 01:27:42,160 --> 01:27:48,679 There's something she said to me yesterday. Charlotte. When she was talking about you. 865 01:27:51,440 --> 01:27:55,911 If I don't pass it on, it's going to be on my conscience forever. 866 01:27:57,800 --> 01:28:02,828 She's never said this to you herself, in so many words, but... 867 01:28:05,440 --> 01:28:08,193 you're really not her type. Sorry. 868 01:28:12,760 --> 01:28:14,751 Probably as well. 869 01:28:15,720 --> 01:28:21,670 Who needs all that latent hysteria? String yourself up from an oak tree? 870 01:28:21,840 --> 01:28:24,115 You couldn't be doing with it. 871 01:28:25,680 --> 01:28:27,398 Exactly. 872 01:28:28,360 --> 01:28:31,875 - I suppose you've got nowhere to sleep. - Do you mind? 873 01:28:32,040 --> 01:28:36,591 How long do the exterminators reckon it'll take? Days? Weeks? 874 01:28:36,760 --> 01:28:38,876 We could be talking millennium. 875 01:28:39,040 --> 01:28:40,837 - Really? - Would I lie to you? 876 01:28:41,000 --> 01:28:42,797 And hey presto! 877 01:28:42,960 --> 01:28:45,269 What went wrong? He's still here. 878 01:28:45,440 --> 01:28:48,796 His powers have failed him. We'll have to use the lift. 879 01:28:48,960 --> 01:28:51,679 (ADAM) Oh, God!