1 00:00:00,149 --> 00:00:02,950 Joey Blunts in the m-m-m-morning. 2 00:00:03,067 --> 00:00:04,883 Yo, Joey Blunts here, 101.2 3 00:00:06,571 --> 00:00:08,154 Yo, hey, everybody, man. 4 00:00:08,156 --> 00:00:09,739 We still tripping on that last-- 5 00:00:12,076 --> 00:00:14,660 - That was crazy! - Wardrobe malfunction. 6 00:00:17,081 --> 00:00:19,169 Y'all are crazy. I can't tell you no more. 7 00:00:19,191 --> 00:00:21,033 Like, all dirty, but she's crazy. 8 00:00:21,035 --> 00:00:23,252 - Would you do that, Meatball? - Look, man... 9 00:00:23,254 --> 00:00:24,870 I grew up in the hood, all right? 10 00:00:24,872 --> 00:00:25,921 So no. 11 00:00:26,996 --> 00:00:28,841 No, he would want to, but he can't do it 12 00:00:28,843 --> 00:00:30,426 'cause of that fat ass. 13 00:00:32,213 --> 00:00:34,013 Why y'all always clowning on Meatball? 14 00:00:34,015 --> 00:00:35,297 Meatball! 15 00:00:35,299 --> 00:00:36,348 You brought it up. 16 00:00:36,350 --> 00:00:37,633 For real, though. 17 00:00:37,635 --> 00:00:39,885 You're a lesser person. 18 00:00:39,887 --> 00:00:41,387 Y'all you two got to stop playing. 19 00:00:41,389 --> 00:00:42,388 Meatball! 20 00:00:42,390 --> 00:00:43,772 Lady J with me here, Meatball. 21 00:00:43,774 --> 00:00:44,730 Meatball. 22 00:00:44,733 --> 00:00:46,558 This the top of the hour. I'm Joey Blunts. 23 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:47,559 We'll be right back. 24 00:00:47,561 --> 00:00:48,894 - Meatball. - Whoo! 25 00:01:11,001 --> 00:01:13,135 KBeat 101.3. 26 00:01:16,057 --> 00:01:19,508 Meatball, Meatball! 27 00:01:41,672 --> 00:01:45,044 Sync & corrections by dwigt addic7ed.com 28 00:01:45,953 --> 00:01:48,370 So, dude, I swear to God, man. 29 00:01:48,372 --> 00:01:52,124 Stewardesses are looking hot to me. 30 00:01:52,126 --> 00:01:55,294 I don't care how old, 31 00:01:55,296 --> 00:01:56,929 what shape. 32 00:01:56,931 --> 00:01:59,465 I'm just like, let's-- 33 00:01:59,467 --> 00:02:00,799 - Let's go. - Let's go. 34 00:02:00,801 --> 00:02:02,634 - Let's go. - I'll meet you at the toilet. 35 00:02:02,636 --> 00:02:05,471 Bring me an Advil and some ginger ale. 36 00:02:07,024 --> 00:02:09,057 Can I get you anything else? 37 00:02:09,059 --> 00:02:10,063 Yeah, you can. 38 00:02:10,071 --> 00:02:11,904 One time, I had, like, a sinus infection 39 00:02:11,906 --> 00:02:13,156 when the plane was coming down, 40 00:02:13,156 --> 00:02:14,648 and, [bleep], my girl was just like, 41 00:02:14,648 --> 00:02:16,982 "I know. I know. I'm so sorry." 42 00:02:16,984 --> 00:02:18,200 She was like, "I know. 43 00:02:18,202 --> 00:02:21,320 "Oh, I'm so sorry." 44 00:02:23,374 --> 00:02:25,040 Okay, all right. 45 00:02:28,379 --> 00:02:29,711 He's disgusting. 46 00:02:29,713 --> 00:02:31,380 Bernard? He's disgusting. 47 00:02:31,382 --> 00:02:32,748 He's not even like her. 48 00:02:32,750 --> 00:02:35,000 He's an airplane technician. I mean, come on. 49 00:02:35,002 --> 00:02:37,136 And he talks too much. That's why I like you. 50 00:02:37,138 --> 00:02:38,420 You don't talk. You just listen. 51 00:02:38,422 --> 00:02:40,472 It's good. 52 00:02:40,474 --> 00:02:41,717 Okay. 53 00:02:43,894 --> 00:02:46,562 And the captain has turned on the "Fasten seat belt" sign. 54 00:02:46,564 --> 00:02:48,230 Got a little turbulence coming up. 55 00:02:48,232 --> 00:02:49,515 Should be no problem. 56 00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:51,600 Just remain in your seat until the sign is turned off. 57 00:02:51,602 --> 00:02:53,519 Thank you for your cooperation. 58 00:02:54,905 --> 00:02:55,854 Okay. 59 00:02:58,275 --> 00:03:01,577 Excuse me. I'm gonna go to the bathroom. 60 00:03:01,579 --> 00:03:03,265 Hi, excuse me. 61 00:03:03,831 --> 00:03:05,280 - Yeah? - Yeah. 62 00:03:05,282 --> 00:03:06,698 I'm gonna need you to take your seat. 63 00:03:06,700 --> 00:03:08,033 The "Fasten seat belt" sign is on. 64 00:03:08,035 --> 00:03:09,739 Yeah, I'm just gonna go to the bathroom for a second. 65 00:03:09,743 --> 00:03:11,036 I'll be right back, okay? 66 00:03:11,038 --> 00:03:12,337 I understand what you want to do. 67 00:03:12,339 --> 00:03:13,672 Unfortunately, I'm gonna need you 68 00:03:13,674 --> 00:03:15,841 to observe the "fasten seat belt" sign. 69 00:03:15,843 --> 00:03:17,593 That'd be much appreciated. 70 00:03:17,595 --> 00:03:19,127 Right, it's just I read on the Internet 71 00:03:19,129 --> 00:03:20,546 that it's not against the law 72 00:03:20,548 --> 00:03:21,630 for me to go to the bathroom 73 00:03:21,632 --> 00:03:24,183 while the "Fasten seat belt" sign is on, so... 74 00:03:24,185 --> 00:03:25,434 "Seat belt" sign is on. 75 00:03:25,436 --> 00:03:28,053 But is it against the law, though? 76 00:03:28,055 --> 00:03:29,054 The light is on. 77 00:03:30,224 --> 00:03:32,057 Is it against the law? 78 00:03:32,059 --> 00:03:33,392 You see that there's a picture 79 00:03:33,394 --> 00:03:34,560 of a seat belt on that sign. 80 00:03:34,562 --> 00:03:37,196 I know, but is it against the law, though? 81 00:03:37,198 --> 00:03:38,730 The "Fasten seat belt" sign is on. 82 00:03:38,732 --> 00:03:40,115 But is it against the law, though? 83 00:03:40,117 --> 00:03:41,900 - "Seat belt" sign is on. - But is it against the law? 84 00:03:41,902 --> 00:03:43,569 - But is it against the law? - "Seat belt" sign. 85 00:03:43,571 --> 00:03:45,037 - But is it against the law? - It's on. 86 00:03:45,039 --> 00:03:46,572 - Law. - "Seat belt" sign is on. 87 00:03:46,574 --> 00:03:48,040 - Legal. - "Seat belt" sign is on. 88 00:03:48,042 --> 00:03:49,408 - Lawful. - "Seat belt" sign is on. 89 00:03:49,410 --> 00:03:50,909 - Sir, you're being difficult. - Law. 90 00:03:50,911 --> 00:03:52,744 - You're being very difficult. - Law, law, law. 91 00:03:52,746 --> 00:03:54,713 - Seat belt, seat belt. - Not illegal, not illegal. 92 00:03:54,715 --> 00:03:56,298 - Okay. - Legal. 93 00:03:56,300 --> 00:03:57,499 - Fasten-- - Legal. 94 00:03:57,501 --> 00:04:00,052 - Fasten your seat-- - Legal. 95 00:04:00,054 --> 00:04:01,303 - Sir. - I have to piss. 96 00:04:01,305 --> 00:04:03,472 And I have to [bleep] in the toilet. 97 00:04:03,474 --> 00:04:04,723 Can you lower your voice? 98 00:04:04,725 --> 00:04:06,592 I have to piss, and I have to [bleep]. 99 00:04:06,594 --> 00:04:07,759 Okay, lower your intensity. 100 00:04:07,761 --> 00:04:08,760 You're louder than me. 101 00:04:08,762 --> 00:04:10,479 You're yelling in my face. 102 00:04:10,481 --> 00:04:12,681 Sir, you're the one who I think needs to tone it down right now. 103 00:04:12,683 --> 00:04:14,066 You are screaming at me. 104 00:04:14,068 --> 00:04:17,769 You're hurting my eardrums. 105 00:04:26,830 --> 00:04:27,913 That wasn't a word. 106 00:04:27,915 --> 00:04:29,114 You're not saying a word there. 107 00:04:29,116 --> 00:04:30,782 This is a word. 108 00:04:30,784 --> 00:04:32,117 - That's not-- - That's a word. 109 00:04:32,119 --> 00:04:35,504 That's not a word. That's a tongue trick. 110 00:04:35,506 --> 00:04:37,422 Okay, sir. Sir, sir. 111 00:04:37,424 --> 00:04:38,507 If you would like-- 112 00:04:38,509 --> 00:04:40,792 I would not like to. 113 00:04:40,794 --> 00:04:42,294 I would not like to sit down. 114 00:04:42,296 --> 00:04:47,049 What I'd like to do is go take a [bleep] in the bathroom... 115 00:04:47,051 --> 00:04:49,635 because it's not 116 00:04:49,637 --> 00:04:53,639 against the law. 117 00:04:53,641 --> 00:04:57,043 So I'm gonna go to the bathroom, okay? 118 00:04:59,146 --> 00:05:01,862 Mark with a K. 119 00:07:47,614 --> 00:07:50,115 And your captain has turned off the "Fasten seat belt" sign. 120 00:07:50,117 --> 00:07:52,651 Feel free to move around the cabin. 121 00:07:52,653 --> 00:07:54,486 Thank you for your cooperation. 122 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:00,046 Good to see you, old boy. 123 00:09:00,048 --> 00:09:01,915 - Yes. - How was Kenya? 124 00:09:01,917 --> 00:09:04,584 I love Kenya. Absolutely adore the place. 125 00:09:04,586 --> 00:09:07,087 You know, it's so important 126 00:09:07,089 --> 00:09:08,304 to protect them, you know... 127 00:09:08,306 --> 00:09:09,305 Indeed. 128 00:09:09,307 --> 00:09:11,091 The few untouched tribes left. 129 00:09:11,093 --> 00:09:12,258 - Indeed. - Yes. 130 00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:13,510 And while we're on the subject, 131 00:09:13,512 --> 00:09:15,762 I've got something of a confession to make. 132 00:09:15,764 --> 00:09:16,779 Oh, dear. 133 00:09:16,857 --> 00:09:18,898 While I was down there, I caught the attention 134 00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:20,183 of a young Masai woman. 135 00:09:20,185 --> 00:09:21,172 You didn't. 136 00:09:21,196 --> 00:09:22,318 She took me for an exotic, 137 00:09:22,320 --> 00:09:24,270 sophisticated superman of sorts 138 00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:26,239 and developed something of a liking to me. 139 00:09:26,241 --> 00:09:28,241 Well, isn't that always the way? 140 00:09:28,243 --> 00:09:29,609 Yes, it is. 141 00:09:29,611 --> 00:09:31,378 And it's quite awful, Gerald. 142 00:09:31,380 --> 00:09:32,612 She came down to my hut 143 00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:35,165 wearing nothing but a fertility headdress 144 00:09:35,167 --> 00:09:36,833 and carrying a husband stick, 145 00:09:36,835 --> 00:09:40,453 and, oh, I had to participate in the customs. 146 00:09:40,455 --> 00:09:41,955 Well, it would be morally irresponsible 147 00:09:41,957 --> 00:09:43,590 if you did not participate in the custom. 148 00:09:43,592 --> 00:09:46,009 You could destroy their entire social structure. 149 00:09:46,011 --> 00:09:48,128 Oh, I felt so terrible about it. 150 00:09:48,130 --> 00:09:49,712 Of course you did, Gerald. 151 00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:52,799 - I felt terrible seven times. - Oh, dreadful. 152 00:09:52,801 --> 00:09:54,601 But, you know, Gerald, I, too, have a confession. 153 00:09:54,603 --> 00:09:55,802 Do tell. 154 00:09:55,804 --> 00:09:57,470 Remember several years ago when I went to the Amazon? 155 00:09:57,472 --> 00:09:58,688 - Yes. - Yes. 156 00:09:58,690 --> 00:10:01,057 Well, I accidentally packed a lighter in my satchel. 157 00:10:01,059 --> 00:10:02,392 Oh, my. 158 00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:04,811 Yes, well, one day, I absent-mindedly lit the flint, 159 00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:06,563 and the entire village took me for a god. 160 00:10:06,565 --> 00:10:07,647 - Oh, no. - Yes. 161 00:10:07,649 --> 00:10:09,315 Every sundown, as I was being fellated 162 00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:10,984 by all the young women of the village, 163 00:10:10,986 --> 00:10:12,535 which is the local custom, 164 00:10:12,537 --> 00:10:16,706 I felt completely embarrassed by the entire affair. 165 00:10:16,708 --> 00:10:19,909 I can only imagine in some vivid detail, 166 00:10:19,911 --> 00:10:23,163 but you can't deny the local custom. 167 00:10:23,165 --> 00:10:24,998 You absolutely cannot deny the local customs. 168 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,333 You can't deny the local customs. 169 00:10:27,335 --> 00:10:30,720 One thing you must do is adhere to the local customs. 170 00:10:31,723 --> 00:10:33,223 You must adhere to the local customs. 171 00:10:35,010 --> 00:10:36,509 You must adhere to the local customs. 172 00:10:36,511 --> 00:10:38,645 Local customs must not be denied! 173 00:10:38,647 --> 00:10:40,847 It's, oh, the least one can do. 174 00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:43,683 It all reminds me of the time I was in Papua New Guinea, 175 00:10:43,685 --> 00:10:45,368 and I introduced the local tribe 176 00:10:45,391 --> 00:10:47,353 to the French term "ménage à trois". 177 00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:49,489 After that evening, a couple of the local men 178 00:10:49,491 --> 00:10:52,025 - called me "Papois". - Oh, dear! 179 00:10:52,027 --> 00:10:54,360 Whoops-a-daisy! 180 00:10:55,363 --> 00:10:56,996 Whoops-a-daisy, indeed. 181 00:10:56,998 --> 00:10:59,866 It's getting harder and harder to protect the local tribes 182 00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:02,202 from the influence of the outside civilizations. 183 00:11:02,204 --> 00:11:05,088 I know exactly what you mean, old boy, exactly, 184 00:11:05,090 --> 00:11:06,706 and I must confess that the last time 185 00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:08,208 I was deep in the bush in Australia... 186 00:11:08,210 --> 00:11:09,209 Yes? 187 00:11:09,211 --> 00:11:10,677 I ended up deep in bush in Australia. 188 00:11:10,679 --> 00:11:12,128 Boo-yah. 189 00:11:12,130 --> 00:11:13,930 Well, where are you off to now, old boy? 190 00:11:13,932 --> 00:11:15,215 I'm off to Tanzania. 191 00:11:15,217 --> 00:11:17,800 Tanzania--make sure that you go during an eclipse, 192 00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:20,053 because then everyone will want to have sex with you. 193 00:11:20,055 --> 00:11:21,054 Mm. 194 00:11:21,056 --> 00:11:22,722 Hmm. 195 00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:23,723 (chuckles) 196 00:11:23,725 --> 00:11:24,724 Regrettably. 197 00:11:34,822 --> 00:11:37,890 Do you think you are-- Do you think you're a sexist? 198 00:11:38,578 --> 00:11:41,734 Mm... Mm... Much to my chagrin, yes, I am. 199 00:11:41,909 --> 00:11:44,054 - You are? - I am. I try not to be, but I am. 200 00:11:44,101 --> 00:11:46,007 - That's good that you know that. - Oh, yeah. 201 00:11:46,016 --> 00:11:48,482 'cause I'm-- If anything, I'm sexist against men. 202 00:11:49,193 --> 00:11:50,373 Mm. 203 00:11:50,373 --> 00:11:54,508 We sexualize women as soon as possible. 204 00:11:54,510 --> 00:11:56,127 It's the first thing we do. 205 00:11:56,129 --> 00:11:58,179 I took a woman's studies class in college, 206 00:11:58,181 --> 00:12:01,015 and we were in a discussion with the professor-- 207 00:12:01,017 --> 00:12:03,100 Ah, you got in a woman's studies class, dog. 208 00:12:03,102 --> 00:12:04,101 No, no, no, Jordan. 209 00:12:04,103 --> 00:12:05,553 I know what you're doing, dude. 210 00:12:05,555 --> 00:12:06,804 Yeah. 211 00:12:06,806 --> 00:12:08,305 Get a little extracurriculars. 212 00:12:08,307 --> 00:12:09,306 Oh, my God. 213 00:12:09,308 --> 00:12:11,192 We gots to do-- anybody want to work 214 00:12:11,194 --> 00:12:13,978 on this project at my house afterwards? 215 00:12:13,980 --> 00:12:15,479 That's some nice [bleep], dude. 216 00:12:26,042 --> 00:12:29,210 What if we told y'all that once a month, 217 00:12:29,212 --> 00:12:31,212 half the human race is in pain? 218 00:12:31,214 --> 00:12:34,665 And the other half 219 00:12:34,667 --> 00:12:38,919 don't want to hear [bleep] about it? 220 00:12:38,921 --> 00:12:40,888 - I'm Shaboots Michaels! - I'm T-Ray Tombstone! 221 00:12:40,890 --> 00:12:41,972 Welcome to... 222 00:12:41,974 --> 00:12:44,975 Menstruation Orientation! 223 00:12:44,977 --> 00:12:47,061 Oh, no, you don't. 224 00:12:47,063 --> 00:12:48,345 Now, we know you don't want to hear about it. 225 00:12:48,347 --> 00:12:49,680 But they don't want to have it, 226 00:12:49,682 --> 00:12:52,183 so sit your ass down and listen for once in your life. 227 00:12:52,185 --> 00:12:53,934 Today we're gonna talk to all you men 228 00:12:53,936 --> 00:12:56,153 about what happens to your women when they're on their periods 229 00:12:56,155 --> 00:12:57,605 and why it's important to... 230 00:12:57,607 --> 00:13:00,074 Be sensitive to that [bleep]. 231 00:13:00,076 --> 00:13:03,027 Don't say "chillax," "relax," "calm down," and "how come?" 232 00:13:03,029 --> 00:13:06,614 Don't say "ass," "fat," "grumpy," or "cranky." 233 00:13:06,616 --> 00:13:07,865 They ain't cranky. 234 00:13:07,867 --> 00:13:10,201 They got blood coming out of their vaginas, y'all! 235 00:13:10,203 --> 00:13:13,204 That's some biblical plague [bleep], y'all! 236 00:13:13,206 --> 00:13:14,538 That would be like once a month 237 00:13:14,540 --> 00:13:17,374 if you had locusts flying out of your dick for a week! 238 00:13:17,376 --> 00:13:19,043 Your ass wouldn't be cranky. 239 00:13:19,045 --> 00:13:20,261 Your ass would be like... 240 00:13:20,263 --> 00:13:23,264 - Oh, [bleep]! 241 00:13:23,266 --> 00:13:25,933 - My dick! 242 00:13:25,935 --> 00:13:29,887 So be nice to your bitches when they bleeding! 243 00:13:29,889 --> 00:13:31,772 If you ain't getting 'em [bleep]... 244 00:13:31,774 --> 00:13:33,557 Get the [bleep] out they way! 245 00:13:33,559 --> 00:13:35,276 - They got cramps! - They got headaches. 246 00:13:35,278 --> 00:13:36,277 They got weight gain! 247 00:13:36,279 --> 00:13:37,561 And every time they pee, 248 00:13:37,563 --> 00:13:39,613 it's like The Shining in the toilet. 249 00:13:39,615 --> 00:13:41,615 - Be supportive. - Be empathetic. 250 00:13:41,617 --> 00:13:43,234 But whatever you do... 251 00:13:43,236 --> 00:13:45,569 Do not try to solve it! 252 00:13:45,571 --> 00:13:47,321 Don't even bring that [bleep] up! 253 00:13:47,323 --> 00:13:48,789 When women be hanging out together, 254 00:13:48,791 --> 00:13:50,541 their periods will sync up. 255 00:13:50,543 --> 00:13:52,543 Vaginas be communicating. 256 00:13:52,545 --> 00:13:54,411 They got their own vagina language. 257 00:13:54,413 --> 00:13:55,412 Talking about... 258 00:14:02,255 --> 00:14:04,004 If you find yourself around a group of women 259 00:14:04,006 --> 00:14:06,090 and they all have a backache... 260 00:14:06,092 --> 00:14:08,309 Back away slowly. 261 00:14:08,311 --> 00:14:10,261 What's that in your pocket there, Shaboots? 262 00:14:10,263 --> 00:14:12,730 Recognize this, mother[bleep]? 263 00:14:12,732 --> 00:14:14,431 That ain't space dynamite. 264 00:14:14,433 --> 00:14:15,733 That's a tampon. 265 00:14:15,735 --> 00:14:17,985 Learn what your bitch has to go through. 266 00:14:17,987 --> 00:14:20,604 First, you put this piece in your vagina! 267 00:14:20,606 --> 00:14:21,689 Oop. 268 00:14:21,691 --> 00:14:23,824 Then you push this part into the first piece! 269 00:14:23,826 --> 00:14:24,825 Gweeps 270 00:14:24,827 --> 00:14:26,911 Then you throw this part away! 271 00:14:26,913 --> 00:14:29,697 Do that several times a day for a week 272 00:14:29,699 --> 00:14:31,749 every goddamn month! 273 00:14:31,751 --> 00:14:34,668 It's the worst thing ever all the time! 274 00:14:34,670 --> 00:14:36,086 It's much worse for them 275 00:14:36,088 --> 00:14:38,378 than it is for you to hear about it. 276 00:14:38,438 --> 00:14:39,790 And periods is important. 277 00:14:39,792 --> 00:14:41,425 That's how the body gets rid of the old egg 278 00:14:41,427 --> 00:14:42,843 so it can cook up them new ones. 279 00:14:42,845 --> 00:14:44,845 So listen to what's going on with your female 280 00:14:44,847 --> 00:14:45,963 emotionally and... 281 00:14:45,965 --> 00:14:47,848 Get your bitch some chocolate! 282 00:14:47,850 --> 00:14:49,300 Don't call her a bitch, but... 283 00:14:49,302 --> 00:14:51,885 Get your bitch some chocolate! 284 00:14:53,773 --> 00:14:55,306 ♪ Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate ♪ 285 00:14:55,308 --> 00:14:56,890 ♪ Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate ♪ 286 00:14:56,892 --> 00:14:58,475 ♪ Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate ♪ 287 00:14:58,477 --> 00:15:00,027 ♪ Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate ♪ 288 00:15:00,029 --> 00:15:01,612 ♪ Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate, chocolate ♪ 289 00:15:01,614 --> 00:15:03,697 ♪ Chocolate ♪ 290 00:15:07,662 --> 00:15:10,948 It's weird being in a relationship this long, 291 00:15:10,950 --> 00:15:14,368 when you start to go on, like, double dates 292 00:15:14,370 --> 00:15:15,453 with other couples. 293 00:15:15,455 --> 00:15:16,587 Mm-hmm. 294 00:15:16,589 --> 00:15:19,006 I'll go an entire night and not even realize 295 00:15:19,008 --> 00:15:21,067 that my girlfriend hated this bitch. 296 00:15:21,115 --> 00:15:22,209 Right. 297 00:15:22,211 --> 00:15:25,122 I'll be like, "Oh," 'cause there was a whole subplot. 298 00:15:25,136 --> 00:15:27,431 I feel like I've been in that situation before. 299 00:15:27,433 --> 00:15:29,049 I'll tell you, I had one situation 300 00:15:29,051 --> 00:15:30,551 where there was guy that I ended up-- 301 00:15:30,553 --> 00:15:33,387 I'm gonna just be straight-- I'm gonna be straight about it. 302 00:15:33,389 --> 00:15:35,689 I'm like, "This dude seems pretty interested 303 00:15:35,691 --> 00:15:36,974 "in what I do for a living. 304 00:15:36,976 --> 00:15:38,358 "I don't give a [bleep]..." 305 00:15:38,493 --> 00:15:39,525 Oh, [bleep]. 306 00:15:39,527 --> 00:15:40,860 "About what he does for a living." 307 00:15:40,862 --> 00:15:41,804 Oh, [bleep]. 308 00:15:41,808 --> 00:15:43,663 "I don't want to hear actuarial tables." 309 00:15:43,665 --> 00:15:45,164 Calling him off. 310 00:15:48,571 --> 00:15:50,404 There's no way that he can win. 311 00:15:50,406 --> 00:15:51,705 No, mm-mm, no. 312 00:15:51,707 --> 00:15:53,874 So, anyway, what did you think of the season finale 313 00:15:53,876 --> 00:15:54,875 of Game of Thrones? 314 00:15:54,877 --> 00:15:55,779 Right? 315 00:15:55,798 --> 00:15:57,381 - That was-- - No, no, no. 316 00:15:57,641 --> 00:15:58,923 I'm reading the books. 317 00:15:59,103 --> 00:16:01,404 Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. 318 00:16:01,551 --> 00:16:02,750 And he reads slow. 319 00:16:04,086 --> 00:16:06,086 We can never talk about it. 320 00:16:06,088 --> 00:16:07,671 We're never gonna talk about it. 321 00:16:07,673 --> 00:16:08,923 Okay. 322 00:16:08,925 --> 00:16:10,257 - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. - Uh-huh. 323 00:16:10,259 --> 00:16:13,093 Hey, has anybody seen that new Russell Crowe thriller? 324 00:16:13,095 --> 00:16:14,094 'cause let me tell-- 325 00:16:14,096 --> 00:16:15,646 Ah, ah, ah! 326 00:16:15,648 --> 00:16:17,431 Ah. 327 00:16:17,433 --> 00:16:18,723 Sorry, it's just 328 00:16:18,828 --> 00:16:20,935 we're going tomorrow, and I don't want to know 329 00:16:20,937 --> 00:16:22,236 a thing about it. 330 00:16:22,238 --> 00:16:23,821 Doesn't want to know a thing. 331 00:16:23,823 --> 00:16:26,657 - Got you. Okay, all right. - Sure, yeah. 332 00:16:26,659 --> 00:16:29,493 Yeah, yeah. That is-- 333 00:16:29,495 --> 00:16:30,911 How--who won the game? 334 00:16:30,913 --> 00:16:33,497 - I think-- - N-n-n-n-n-n-n. 335 00:16:33,499 --> 00:16:36,116 That--I'm-- I'm gonna watch it later. 336 00:16:36,118 --> 00:16:37,835 - Oh, you're-- - Oh, you have a DVR. 337 00:16:37,837 --> 00:16:39,170 - I got it-- - Sorry, okay. 338 00:16:39,172 --> 00:16:40,187 Mum's the word. 339 00:16:40,189 --> 00:16:42,840 - Yeah. - So... 340 00:16:48,581 --> 00:16:50,229 - So... - Yeah. 341 00:16:50,652 --> 00:16:52,366 What's the weather gonna be like this-- 342 00:16:56,956 --> 00:16:58,210 Sorry. It's, uh... 343 00:16:59,370 --> 00:17:00,883 We're having a barbecue this weekend, 344 00:17:00,897 --> 00:17:02,697 and I don't want to stress about the weather. 345 00:17:02,712 --> 00:17:04,378 - No, of course you don't. - We just-- Yeah. 346 00:17:04,406 --> 00:17:06,312 Yeah. You know, yeah. 347 00:17:17,393 --> 00:17:18,726 This three-bean casserole is-- 348 00:17:22,980 --> 00:17:24,563 I'm so sorry, babe. I just-- 349 00:17:24,590 --> 00:17:26,859 - I hadn't tasted them yet. - I'm sorry. 350 00:17:26,861 --> 00:17:28,895 - I'm sorry. - Really looking forward to it. 351 00:17:28,897 --> 00:17:29,979 You know? 352 00:17:29,981 --> 00:17:31,855 Don't talk about the ingredients, I know. 353 00:17:31,870 --> 00:17:33,985 It's a surprise for your mouth. 354 00:17:34,049 --> 00:17:35,368 - Yeah. - Really. 355 00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:43,052 Oh, uh... 356 00:17:45,082 --> 00:17:47,632 You know that commercial with-- 357 00:17:47,828 --> 00:17:49,445 Okay, never-- 358 00:17:49,447 --> 00:17:51,239 Oh. 359 00:17:52,549 --> 00:17:54,549 Okay. 360 00:17:58,645 --> 00:17:59,978 Never mind. 361 00:18:00,677 --> 00:18:01,661 That's probably best. 362 00:18:01,661 --> 00:18:04,013 Yeah. 363 00:18:07,018 --> 00:18:08,351 Oh. 364 00:18:11,739 --> 00:18:13,606 No, it's fine. 365 00:18:19,611 --> 00:18:21,030 Cheesecake. 366 00:18:21,876 --> 00:18:23,139 - What? - Huh? 367 00:18:23,413 --> 00:18:24,971 Got cheesecake. 368 00:18:26,101 --> 00:18:27,389 - I mean-- - Oh, yeah! 369 00:18:27,478 --> 00:18:29,257 - No, I'd love some cheesecake. - Yeah. 370 00:18:29,290 --> 00:18:30,941 - Let's do that. - Yeah. 371 00:18:30,967 --> 00:18:32,793 - All right! - Cheesecake! 372 00:18:32,985 --> 00:18:35,430 I mean-- I mean I've been watching my cholesterol intake. 373 00:18:35,451 --> 00:18:36,855 But, what the hell, right? 374 00:18:36,904 --> 00:18:38,795 We all gonna die some day anyway, right? 375 00:18:39,111 --> 00:18:40,313 - What? - Honey. 376 00:18:40,364 --> 00:18:41,609 - Wow! - Are you kidding me? 377 00:18:41,650 --> 00:18:43,561 - Really? - You just ruined it! 378 00:18:43,609 --> 00:18:45,414 Every time! I'll see you at home. 379 00:18:45,431 --> 00:18:46,519 - Wait a second! - Rude! Rude! 380 00:18:46,734 --> 00:18:49,404 Now, how would you not know that that was taking place? 381 00:18:52,928 --> 00:18:55,883 Father, please hear our prayer for the poor. 382 00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:56,949 Thank you, Father. Yes. 383 00:18:56,984 --> 00:18:59,769 We beseech You for the disenfranchised, 384 00:18:59,771 --> 00:19:02,855 the less fortunate, and those that suffer. 385 00:19:02,857 --> 00:19:04,023 Yes. 386 00:19:04,025 --> 00:19:06,692 Show us Your will so we can continue 387 00:19:06,694 --> 00:19:07,910 to do Your work. 388 00:19:07,912 --> 00:19:09,495 Yes. 389 00:19:09,497 --> 00:19:14,083 I've come to answer your prayers. 390 00:19:14,085 --> 00:19:18,587 Listen carefully to my instructions. 391 00:19:18,589 --> 00:19:21,290 Oh, God. Thank you. 392 00:19:21,292 --> 00:19:22,925 Thank you so much. 393 00:19:22,927 --> 00:19:27,346 I want you to send everything you own... 394 00:19:27,348 --> 00:19:31,634 immediately in service to the poor. 395 00:19:35,890 --> 00:19:37,973 Just want to clarify. Um... 396 00:19:37,975 --> 00:19:40,776 everything? 397 00:19:40,778 --> 00:19:43,863 Yes, rid yourself 398 00:19:43,865 --> 00:19:46,782 of all earthly possessions. 399 00:19:52,657 --> 00:19:55,157 Oh, [bleep]! This house is haunted! 400 00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:57,660 It's a ghost! 401 00:19:57,662 --> 00:19:59,245 It's a haunted house! 402 00:19:59,247 --> 00:20:01,163 Go, go, go, go, go! 403 00:20:01,165 --> 00:20:02,548 It's Insidious. 404 00:20:05,503 --> 00:20:06,969 Oh. 405 00:20:06,971 --> 00:20:10,005 I see what they did there. 406 00:20:14,345 --> 00:20:16,846 Is there any religion where you literally-- 407 00:20:16,848 --> 00:20:19,815 I mean, the ceremony is just, like, five seconds 408 00:20:19,817 --> 00:20:21,183 once a month. 409 00:20:21,185 --> 00:20:22,568 You hit it, and you're just like... 410 00:20:25,690 --> 00:20:27,523 "I'm good for two months." 411 00:20:27,525 --> 00:20:29,608 That's the other thing. You can stockpile them. 412 00:20:29,610 --> 00:20:31,443 - You can do a bunch in a row. - Do a bunch in a row. 413 00:20:31,445 --> 00:20:32,444 Stockpile them. 414 00:20:32,446 --> 00:20:34,113 Like, if I spent a day just doing... 415 00:20:36,667 --> 00:20:37,750 Never have to do it again. 416 00:20:37,752 --> 00:20:39,084 Done, you're set. 417 00:20:39,086 --> 00:20:41,504 Buddy, you might've worked something out there. 418 00:20:41,506 --> 00:20:42,705 This is how-- 419 00:20:42,707 --> 00:20:44,373 I think you could get some followers there. 420 00:20:44,375 --> 00:20:45,541 I think so too. 421 00:20:45,543 --> 00:20:46,959 I'm gonna just keep going to jerk churches 422 00:20:46,961 --> 00:20:48,377 and dancing around and screaming. 423 00:20:48,379 --> 00:20:49,378 I'll do that. 424 00:20:49,380 --> 00:20:52,330 Sync & corrections by dwigt addic7ed.com 425 00:20:52,675 --> 00:20:54,675 ♪ I'm gonna do my one line here ♪ 426 00:20:54,773 --> 00:20:56,507 Oh, yeah...