[Sighs]
Oh, what a struggle, just to get him to wash his face.
Ward, do you think the Beaver will ever reach the point where he;ll wanna be clean?
I wouldn't be surprised. Look at the change in Wally.
Yes. How about that? What do you suppose happened all of a sudden?
There's an old saying, dear— “When girls come in the door, dirt goes out the window.”
Oh, dear. And Beaver's hardly eight.
Looks like we've got at least four more years of dirt.
[Announcer] Leave It To Beaver.
Starring Barbara Billingsley, Hugh Beaumont, Tony Dow...
and Jerry Mathers as the Beaver.
Good morning, Mrs. Cleaver. Hello, Eddie.
I came to pick up Wally. Fine. Come on in.
We're going to the movies.
Wally!
Do you think I look all right, Mrs. Cleaver?
Why, yes, you look very nice. Thank you.
Mmm!
Smell quite nice too.
Oh, that's my aftershave lotion.
Why, Eddie, do you shave?
— No, but I like to smell like I do. —Yes.
Wally! Eddie Haskell's here!
[Wally] I'll be down in a minute.
You can wait in the living room. Thank you very much, Mrs. Cleaver.
Now, are you sure I look all right? Yes, Eddie, you look fine.
Good,'cause we're going to the movies, you know.
So you said.
Mmm.
That was Eddie Haskell.
You know, he looks so neat and he smells so neat, it frightens me.
I think some of it must be rubbing off on Wally too.
I caught him using a fingernail file last week.
On his fingernails? Uh-huh.
Last time the boys borrowed my fingernail file, they used it to file the date off a penny.
Well, from pennies to fingernails— that's progress.
You know, it's funny. What's funny?
The human male goes through three stages,
from a messy little boy in dirty jeans and a sweatshirt...
to a neat young man.
Then he gets married and goes back to the dirty jeans and the sweatshirt.
Dear, a married man being neat is like running fora bus after you've caught it.
Ha—ha—ha. Aren't we the kitchen comedian though?
Good—bye, Mom. We're going to the movies. Bye, Dad.
Bye. Bye, Mr. Cleaver. You're doing a real neat job there.
Thank you very much, Eddie.
— Come on, Eddie. — Boys, wait a minute.
What about the Beaver? Well, gee, Mom, he's not around.
But you promised to take the Beaver and Larry Mondello to the movies with you.
Now, you can wait a bit.
Gee, Mrs. Cleaver, It's almost 1:00 now.
Yeah, and if we don't hurry up and get there, we'll only be able to see the double feature once.
Yeah, June. They gotta get there in time to ruin their eyes.
Now, boys, you can wait a few minutes.
Okay, Mom.
I don't mind waiting at all, Mrs. Cleaver.
Hey, Wally, have we gotta wait for those grubby little creeps?
Well, Mom wants us to.
Yeah, but...
with them hanging around, how are we gonna talk to any girls in the movies?
Yeah, and if we don't hurry up and get there, there's not gonna be any good ones left to sit with.
Your messy little brother's bad enough, but that Larry Mondello!
When you're talkin' to a girl, he sits behind you and makes those crazy noises.
[Smooch, Pop]
— Hi, Wally. We're all set to go. — It's about time.
Maybe we could ask your mother for somethin' to eat first.
Hey, Wally, look at these two goons.
What's the matter with us? Yeah, what's the matter?
What's the matter?
You're a couple of little slobs.
Well, maybe I got a little mud on me, but I had to wait for Larry. He had to take a bath this morning.
Yeah, I did. In the tub.
What have you been doin', Beaver— wrestling in the dirt?
Of course not, Wally. Me and Larry just took a shortcut through the storm drain.
Well, boys, you all set?
Oh, Beaver, look at you! You're so dirty!
I didn't notice.
He looks all right to me, Mrs. Cleaver.
I'm sure he does, Larry.
Beaver, you're gonna go upstairs and get cleaned up before you go anywhere.
— Gee, have I got to? — You certainly do.
I think I'll stay down here.
I don't even like to watch a guy get washed.
Come on, Beaver. I'll go with you to make sure you put a clean shirt on.
You don't really want to go to the movies, do you, Mondello?
Sure, you don't, Larry. The picture's no good.
I know it's no good. I already seen it.
— Then what do you want to go for? —'Cause.
—'Cause why? —'Cause me and Beaver wanna sit behind you.
- [Horn Squeaks, Rattles] — Why, you dirty little—
You're really gonna get it—
Hey, fellows, I thought you were going to the movies.
We were, Dad, but Beaver had to go up and get washed.
I don't know why, Mr. Cleaver. He was hardly dirty at all.
He was really a mess, Mr. Cleaver.
Well, men, I'll tell you,
when it comes to neatness, this younger generation is really a problem.
Boy, they sure are, Dad.
So long, Dad! Come on, fellas! ! et'5 go!
[June] Theodore you come back here! You didn't even dry yourself!
There's a breeze out, Mom. I'll dry myself on the way to the movies.
Dear, believe me, it'll work.
If we start praising Wally in front of the Beaver for being neat, Beaver will get the idea.
All kids want the approval Of their parents.
Well, I just hate to see you force it.
Maybe the Beaver will outgrow being sloppy.
Oh, June, that's not the modern approach.
You can't wait for kids to outgrow things.
No? No.
You have to send them to orthodontists, psychologists.
They've even got experts to teach children how to play.
No self—respecting parent would dream of relying on nature anymore.
Well, I just hope you don't hurt the Beaver's feelings by praising Wally.
Well, all I can say is, it works down at the office.
Every time we have a sales meeting, we praise the fellows who have gone over their quotas.
Then the guys who have been kind of dragging along get the idea,
and they get out there and really start hitting the ball.
Do they always do that?
No. About half of them quit.
But, uh, it's the principle of the thing.
Look, dear, just let me handle this. Believe me, it'll work.
All right.
Ward, why do you always put the silverware backwards?
Oh, well, that's a hangover from my prep school days. We always did it that way.
It was our method Of striking back at the social order.
Is dinner ready? I could eat a horse.
I could eat an elephant.
Let's just start with the soup, shall we?
[Clears Throat]
Well, Wally, you certainly look great tonight.
So neat and clean. Thanks, Dad.
Let's have a look at you, Beaver.
I washed my face and hands.
You seem to have overlooked your wrists.
Gee, Dad. You gotta stop someplace.
Otherwise, I might as well take a whole bath.
Oh, uh, June,
I was just complimenting Wally on how well he looks tonight.
[June] Yes, he does look very nice.
Don't you think so, Beaver?
He looks all right on the outside, but you oughta see his feet.
Cut it out, Beaver! I took a bath this morning!
Then you oughta seen 'em last night.
All right, Beaver.
But seriously though, Wally, you're really to be congratulated.
Your hair is combed, your— Hey, June, look at those fingernails.
Very nice, Wally.
Miss Canfield says I got the cleanest teeth in my class.
They just look that way 'cause the rest of you is so dirty.
They do not!
Yeah? What about the way you keep up our room?
You oughta see it, Dad I'd be better off livin’ with a pig
Then why don't ya get a pig to live with?
I don't have to. I got you.
All right, boys. That's enough of that.
Uh, I'm afraid, Beaver, I have to agree with Wally though.
You see, Wally's at the age where he's trying to be neat and clean,
both about himself and about his room,
and well, you're just not cooperating
Mom, do you think I'm a pig too?
Well, Beaver, I would like to see you a lot—
Well, a little bit neater than you are.
Coffee ready, dear?
It's all poured there.
You know, dear, I'm afraid we hurt the Beaver's feelings last night.
Oh, we may have hurt 'em a little bit, but I think we got the message across.
I wish we could get the message across with love and kindness.
Oh, cheer up, June.
If everything else fails, we can always resort to that. Oh, Ward.
I gotta get goin'.
Where's the Beaver? He's upstairs. He's shining his shoes.
Shi— Here. Don't forget your lunch. All right.
Hey, where's your lunch box, Wally?
Gee, Dad, I'm in the eighth grade. I'm too big to carry a lunch box.
Oh. So long.
Bye.
Well, the Beaver's upstairs shining his shoes.
Yes.
You know, maybe sometimes you do know what you're talking about.
Oh, thanks a lot. Hmm.
Beaver.
Honey, you're gonna be late.
No, I'm not. I'm just shining my shoes.
And you're getting it all over your ankle.
That won't show when I put my sock on.
What'd you do, cut your finger?
No, I just stuck it with the nail file.
It's not hard being neat, but it hurts a little.
Take a look, Mom.
And it's that way all the way up. I took a whole bath.
Well, wonderful.
Mom, take a look at my hair. I used Wally's hair cream on it.
Mmm. Well, I'd better be goin'.
Bye, Mom. Bye, honey.
So long, Dad. So long, Beaver.
Hey, the Beaver really looks— [June Screams]
Oh, my gosh!
The Beaver looked fine, but the bathroom never looked worse.
Well, the dirt came off the Beaver. It had to go somewhere else.
That's one of the immutable laws of nature.
Oh, hi, Larry. Hi, Beaver.
You were late to school this morning.
That's on account of I had to stay home and get washed up.
That can get you in a lot of trouble.
Larry, how come you eat your cake first?
If I ate the sandwiches first, I might not have room for the cake.
How come you got cleaned up this morning? This ain't the day the school nurse looks at us.
I know. I had to get cleaned up 'cause my brother got cleaned up.
Yeah, I know how it is.
My big brother started to like girls and he was taking baths all the time.
My parents started to make fun of me, so I fixed my brother good.
What'd you do, Larry?
I told my mother I wanted a room for myself.
— Did that make your brother stop takin' baths? — No, but they stopped pickin' on me.
If you got your own room, If it gets dirty, you can just close the door.
Then there's nobody around to squeal on you.
I don't know about movin' out on Wally. I've been with him almost all my life.
It's either that or keeping your room clean all the time.
We're gonna have to get you some drapes in here.
Okay, Mom.
— What are these? — Worms.
They can't hurt you, Mom. They died a couple weeks ago.
Well, why did you bring them in here?
Because me and Wally collected 'em, and I didn't want to get gypped out of my half.
Here's some more Of his junk, Mom. All right.
Hey, these are my spurs.
They are not. You ”given“'em to me. You said you were too big to play cowboys anymore.
Well, I'm takin' 'em back. I might want to play cowboys again sometime.
Go ahead and take your old junk. I don't want it cluttering up my room anyway.
You know, Beaver, this bed's been in our family for a long time.
It's over a hundred years old.
Boy, the sheets sure stayed clean, didn't they?
I put those on this morning.
— Going right to bed? — After later.
Mom, are there any lions in the neighborhood?
Lions?
Well, of course not. Why?
No reason. I just thunk I heard one before.
Shall I leave the light on in the hall?
You don't have to, Mom.
Well, good night, Beaver.
Good night, Mom.
Beaver. Yes, Mom?
Nothing, dear.
Oh, uh, dear, when you dust, could you put the books back in right side up?
I'm fighting the social order.
The, um— The Beaver all moved in?
All moved in, lock, stock and worms.
[Clears Throat] You, uh, angry about something?
I'm not angry about anything.
Well, then why are you crunching the paper at me?
I'm crunching the paper at you because of what you did to Wally and the Beaver.
You've— Well, you've turned them against each other.
Oh, now, June, that'll all work out.
Look, the Beaver's just being stubborn.
You give him a night alone in that room,
and he'll be so anxious to get back with Wally he'll even clean himself up.
I think it'll be just the other way around.
The Beaver won't give in until Wally comes down to his level.
June, dear, look, Wally's getting older.
The boys going their separate ways Is just one of those things that has to happen.
Maybe so, but I just wish you hadn't have rushed it.
[Yowls]
[Yowling Continues]
[Multiple Cats Yowling]
[Yowling Continues]
Wally!
[Yowling Continues]
Wally! Wally!
What's the matter, Beave?
I just wanted to see if you were all right.
You're not scared, are you?
Are you kidding? What's there to be scared of?
Sure. That's right. What's there to be scared of?
Well, good night. Good night.
Wally?
Sure you're not scared? Don't be 'fraid to tell me.
Are you crazy? Why would I be scared?
Well, you never slept by yourself before. That's scary to some people.
Well, not for me.
How come you're awake then?
'Cause you woke me up. That's how come.
Oh, yeah. I'm sorry.
Well, good night.
Good night.
— Hey, Beaver? — What, Wally? What is it?
If you want anything again, just holler.
If you want anything, you holler to me.
You know somethin'? It might be a good idea if you stayed in here.
It'd save a lot of yellin' back and forth.
That's right! It would!
This is a lot better, isn't it, Wally?
Yeah.
Now if either one of us feels like yelling, we can hear each other.
Yeah, sure, Beaver. Well, good night.
Hey, Beave,
you must have had some reason for gettin' mad at me and moving out.
I guess I did.
What was it?
Well,
all of a sudden, you got neat.
What's wrong with that?
Well, it made me look dirty.
And then you kidded me and called me a pig.
Well, gee, Dad kidded you too.
He's our father. He's allowed to kid us.
You're just my brother.
Well, I didn't mean to make you look bad by being neat.
It was just one of those things.
Wally, I was just thinkin'.
Thinkin' what?
Maybe if you were a little bit sloppier and I was a little bit neater,
it just might work out.
Yeah, we'll give it a try.
We'd better get to sleep now. Yeah.
Good night. Good night, Wally.
We'll see how Wally is. Then we'll look in on the Beaver. All right.
Ward, Beaver's back!
Yeah. How do you like that?
But they were so angry at each other.
Why, Wally called him a pig.
You know, June, there's a lesson here.
It's a wonderful thing about brothers— blood is thicker than dirt.
Come on, Wally. Hurry up!
I'll be right down!
So long Beaver So long tarry.
Aw, Wally! Look at your hair!
I guess I forgot to comb it. I'll do it when we get outside. I don't want Beaver to know.
Hey, Beaver! Look at your brother! He's combing his hair!
What do you expect? They're going to the movies and sit with the girls again.
Oh, yeah.
We could go to the movies too and sit behind 'em, but I don't want 'em sockin' me again.
Wally's a pretty good brother, outside of likin' girls and bein' neat.
That's why I moved back in with him.
Yeah. That having a room of your own isn't so hot.
Don't you have a room of your own anymore?
Nah. I couldn't sleep.
Me neither.
Anyway, my brother got a little lonely all by himself.
Mine too.
Hey, let's go down to the old tunnel and listen to our echoes.
Okay.
I think I'll comb my hair first.
What do you wanna do that for?
It's part of the 'greement I made with Wally.