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Subtitles downloaded from Podnapisi. NET
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- I'm Statler.
- I'm Waldorf.
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We're here to heckle
The Muppet Movie.
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That's straight ahead,
private screening room "D."
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- Private screening?
- They're afraid to show it in public!
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Look at this place.
What a dump!
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Bunch of weirdos around here.
Look at 'em.
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- Yes, I know you all want to...
- Lady, is this seat taken?
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What... Hey, you!
Bring that back!
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I'm so nervous. If I'm not funny,
I won't be able to live with myself.
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Well, then you'll have to get
another apartment, won't you?
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I hear this movie is dynamite.
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Get your fresh organic popcorn,
only a buck.
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- Buy me some, please.
- Sure, Mama.
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- Nothin's too good for my woman.
- Woman! Woman! Woman!
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- I like the movie fine so far.
- It hasn't started yet.
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That's what I like about it!
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Do it!
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Oh, hey, Mr. Defrog!
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Is it okay for me and my boomerang fish
to be in your movie?
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Hey!
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I told you, Luke, not in the movie
or at the screening.
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Hey, but watch.
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Kermit, does this film have
socially redeeming value?
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I certainly hope so, Sam.
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Sorry about that.
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- Kermie!
- Hi, Piggy.
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I tried to save you a seat,
but somebody took it.
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Hi, everybody, and welcome to
the first screening of The Muppet Movie.
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But before we begin, I'd like to thank
everyone who contributed to this film...
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starting with the little people,
from the hairdressers...
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to special effects...
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- That's enough of that, Harry!
- Blow it up! Blow it up!
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To the costume designers,
to the prop makers...
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Speeches are not necessary, dear.
Roll the film.
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But I'd like
to thank everybody...
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for all of their hard work
and patience...
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Roll film! Roll film!
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Roll film!
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Excuse me.
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Uncle Kermit, is this about how
the Muppets really got started?
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Well, it's sort of
approximately how it happened.
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Why are there so many
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Songs about rainbows
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And what's on the other side
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Rainbows are visions
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But only illusions
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And rainbows have nothing to hide
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So we've been told
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And some choose to believe it
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I know they're wrong
Wait and see
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Someday we'll find it
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The rainbow connection
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The lovers, the dreamers and me
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Who said that every wish
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Would be heard and answered
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When wished on the morning star
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Somebody thought of that
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And someone believed it
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Look what it's done so far
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What's so amazing
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That keeps us stargazing
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And what do we think
we might see
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Someday we'll find it
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The rainbow connection
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The lovers, the dreamers and me
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All of us under its spell
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We know that it's probably
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Magic
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Have you been half asleep
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And have you heard voices
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I've heard them calling my name
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Is this the sweet sound
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That calls the young sailors
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The voice might be one and the same
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I've heard it too many times
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To ignore it
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It's something
that I'm supposed to be
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Someday we'll find it
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The rainbow connection
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The lovers, the dreamers and me
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Help! Hello!
This is a serious call for help.
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- Yeah?
- Someone help!
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You with the banjo,
can you help me?
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I have lost
my sense of direction.
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Have you tried Hare Krishna?
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No, I mean, I'm really lost!
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One second.
Darn, I missed.
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That's the first thing
to go on a frog, his tongue.
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The tongue goes and you
can't catch flies.
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I'm sorry about your tongue,
but I have to get out of this swamp.
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- I have to catch a plane.
- With that tongue? No way.
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- There's a boat dock just downstream.
- Thank you.
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- Just watch out for the alligators.
- I will.
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- Alligators?
- That's right.
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- Did you say alligators?
- Read my lips... alligators.
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I'm not used to alligators
where I come from.
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See, I'm an agent.
I winged in from Hollywood.
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- Hollywood?
- That's right.
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- Did you say Hollywood?
- Read my lips... Hollywood.
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You know... Hollywood
The dream factory. The magic store.
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Hey, don't you ever
go to the movies?
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Sure, there's a double feature
in town every Saturday.
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- Wait a minute.
- What?
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There's an ad in here that you
should be very interested in.
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Feast your eyes on that.
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"World Wide Studios announces
open auditions for frogs...
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wishing to become rich and famous."
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Thanks anyway, but I'm really
pretty happy where I am.
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If I were you, I would give this
audition very careful consideration.
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You've got talent, kid...
singin', tellin'jokes.
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I mean, if you get your tongue fixed,
who knows?
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You could make
millions of people happy.
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Millions of people happy.
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Millions!
If you ever come west...
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to Hollywood, look me up...
Bernie, the agent.
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Listen, Bernie the agent, why don't
you say hello to Arnie the alligator?
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- What!
- Arnie!
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- Arnie, wait a minute. Careful.
- Stay! Stay!
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Arnie, leave him alone.
He's from Hollywood.
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Hollywood. Gee.
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Well, I'd miss
this old swamp, but...
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millions of people happy.
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What the...
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Okay, you guys,
do what I tell you.
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I don't know where your...
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Don't step on that asphalt!
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We gotta get this...
Off the asphalt!
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I told you, stay off the asphalt!
Hey, look at him.
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- What are those big legs?
- Hey, you on the bike!
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Watch out! Watch out!
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Oh, my gosh!
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That's pretty dangerous, building a road
in the middle of the street.
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I mean, if frogs couldn't hop,
I'd be gone with the Schwinn.
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"The El Sleezo Cafe."
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Foreign food.
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Doesn't smell promising, but...
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a frog's gotta eat.
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Wow.
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Rough place, huh?
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That the toughest, meanest, filthiest
pest hole on the face of the Earth!
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- Why not complain to the owner?
- I am the owner.
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Watch out. Hot plates
comin' through. Look out.
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You got your french-fried
frog legs au gratin...
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you got your frog legs almandine,
you got your frog legs stroganoff.
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Everybody happy?
All right.
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Hello, sailor.
Buy me a drink?
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I'm not a sailor, I'm a frog.
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- Cut the small talk and buy me a drink.
- I don't even know you.
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Hey, you makin'
a move on my girl?
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- No, sir.
- He did too. He touched me.
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Go wash!
You'll get warts.
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- No, that's just a myth.
- Yeah, but she's my "mith"!
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No, no, myth, myth!
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- Yes?
- What the hey?
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Show time!
Show time at the El Sleezo.
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And now, filling in for the vacationing
El Sleezo dancing girls...
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the funny, furry, fabulous...
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Fozzie Bear!
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You're a great crowd!
Thank you, thank you and thank you!
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Here I am, Fozzie Bear,
to tell you jokes both old and rare!
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Get off the stage!
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Let's start things off
with a bang!
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Thank you, sir.
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This guy's lost.
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Maybe he should try
Hare Krishna.
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Good grief.
It's a running gag.
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There was this sailor
who was so fat...
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How fat was he?
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He was so fat
that everybody liked him...
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and there was nothing
funny about him at all.
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No problem!
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Please!
Oh, please!
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I'm trying so hard.
Please don't get mad.
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I'm a professional.
I've had three performances.
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- Curtain! Curtain!
- Do you know any dance routines?
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What? Not really. Do you?
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- Play something snappy.
- You got it.
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- Now dance!
- What?
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Dance!
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It's too bad the dancing girls
are on vacation.
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The crowd is getting ugly.
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You think this crowd's ugly,
you should see the dancing girls!
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Two, three, four.
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- Two, three, kick!
- Kick. Yeah, sorry.
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Comin' home!
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I just cleaned the fur, please!
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I hope you appreciate that
I'm doing all my own stunts.
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Okay, everybody,
drinks on the house!
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00:16:24,249 --> 00:16:28,447
- Drinks on the house!
- Yeah! Go, go! On the house!
191
00:16:34,492 --> 00:16:36,551
I don't see no drinks up here.
What's he talkin' about?
192
00:16:36,628 --> 00:16:38,892
The bartender said there
were drinks on the house.
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00:16:42,267 --> 00:16:46,226
- Works every time.
- Huh. Wow.
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00:16:46,304 --> 00:16:49,831
My name is Kermit the Frog,
and I'm on my way to Hollywood.
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00:16:49,908 --> 00:16:51,603
- Hollywood?
- You want to join me?
196
00:16:51,676 --> 00:16:55,271
Big-time show biz!
That's always been my dream.
197
00:16:55,346 --> 00:16:58,247
They're holding auditions
for frogs next week.
198
00:16:58,316 --> 00:17:01,945
And if they need frogs,
they must need bears too.
199
00:17:02,020 --> 00:17:04,011
My car's right outside!
200
00:17:06,691 --> 00:17:09,159
Gee, a Studebaker.
Where'd you get it?
201
00:17:09,227 --> 00:17:11,821
- My uncle left it to me.
- Is he dead?
202
00:17:11,896 --> 00:17:13,830
No, he's hibernating.
203
00:17:29,914 --> 00:17:32,246
You know, Fozzie, you really
do have a lot of talent.
204
00:17:32,317 --> 00:17:36,617
- Thank you.
- How about we put together an act?
205
00:17:36,688 --> 00:17:39,953
Nope. Sorry.
I only work as a single.
206
00:17:40,024 --> 00:17:41,958
Okay.
207
00:17:46,297 --> 00:17:49,164
All right, you talked me into it!
We'll be a team!
208
00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:51,862
- Oh, good.
- What's this?
209
00:17:51,936 --> 00:17:54,336
- You better pull over here.
- Yes, sir.
210
00:17:59,544 --> 00:18:01,478
Hey, what's goin' on?
211
00:18:03,481 --> 00:18:05,415
Howdy, Mr. Frog.
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00:18:05,483 --> 00:18:08,350
- I'm a businessman with a proposition.
- What?
213
00:18:08,419 --> 00:18:11,786
Let me show you somethin' that
might change your whole life.
214
00:18:15,627 --> 00:18:18,323
Hop right over here,
my little green friend.
215
00:18:18,396 --> 00:18:21,888
- Listen, mister...
- That's it.
216
00:18:21,966 --> 00:18:25,060
This is the kind of chance
you can't afford to pass up.
217
00:18:25,937 --> 00:18:29,873
Now, now, don't be afraid.
Watch the window.
218
00:18:31,542 --> 00:18:32,975
What's that?
219
00:18:33,912 --> 00:18:36,506
Hi, I'm Doc Hopper...
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invitin'you to hop on down and get
some Hopper's french-fried frog legs...
221
00:18:40,818 --> 00:18:44,618
right here, at the sign
of the bright green legs!
222
00:18:44,689 --> 00:18:46,486
Good grief!
223
00:18:46,557 --> 00:18:49,185
Hurry, hurry, hurry.
224
00:18:49,260 --> 00:18:51,785
Frog legs, frog legs
Frog legs so fine
225
00:18:51,863 --> 00:18:54,627
Hopper's is the place
you should dine
226
00:18:54,699 --> 00:18:57,725
There's cheese legs
bacon legs, chili legs too
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00:18:57,802 --> 00:19:01,397
- French-fried frog legs, barbecued
- Oh, Fozzie.
228
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- If you want just a snack
- Don't worry.
229
00:19:04,475 --> 00:19:07,444
Then here is the one
230
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A frog-leg burger
on a bright green bun
231
00:19:13,751 --> 00:19:18,313
That is terrible! That's the most
revolting thing I've ever seen!
232
00:19:18,389 --> 00:19:20,755
I know. I'm a great businessman
and a sweet fella...
233
00:19:20,825 --> 00:19:22,793
but I do lack the skills
of a performer.
234
00:19:22,860 --> 00:19:24,828
You also make a lousy frog!
235
00:19:24,896 --> 00:19:27,729
You, on the other hand,
make a terrific frog!
236
00:19:27,799 --> 00:19:30,825
- What?
- He's right. You are very likable.
237
00:19:30,902 --> 00:19:33,837
The bear's right.
You, my little likable friend...
238
00:19:33,905 --> 00:19:36,237
are gonna do all our
television commercials!
239
00:19:36,307 --> 00:19:38,832
- No way!
- Just a minute.
240
00:19:38,910 --> 00:19:42,141
There's $500 in it for you,
up front.
241
00:19:42,213 --> 00:19:45,910
$500 is just the beginnin'.
242
00:19:45,984 --> 00:19:49,078
You could be earnin'
this much every year.
243
00:19:49,153 --> 00:19:53,146
- Let's go, Fozzie.
- $500?
244
00:19:53,224 --> 00:19:55,590
Would you consider
a bear in a frog suit?
245
00:19:55,660 --> 00:19:58,629
- Fozzie!
- I just lost my head.
246
00:19:58,696 --> 00:20:02,154
Just a minute, Mr. Frog.
Everything's negotiable.
247
00:20:03,201 --> 00:20:06,693
- Okay, here we go. Sorry!
- Hey, that's my Caddy!
248
00:20:06,771 --> 00:20:10,070
- Just get it in gear, Fozzie!
- Yes, sir. Here we go!
249
00:20:10,141 --> 00:20:13,304
This is money we're talkin' about.
Max!
250
00:20:15,246 --> 00:20:17,180
Follow that frog!
251
00:20:18,349 --> 00:20:19,782
Max!
252
00:20:24,789 --> 00:20:27,087
Follow that frog
with me in the car!
253
00:20:27,158 --> 00:20:31,458
I'm sorry, Doc, I just got excited.
Isn't the frog terrific?
254
00:20:31,529 --> 00:20:34,327
- Terrific. Now go!
- But you promised me a reward.
255
00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:37,391
Later, Max.
Now follow that frog!
256
00:20:42,407 --> 00:20:45,376
- It's a gorgeous day.
- Yep, certainly is.
257
00:20:45,443 --> 00:20:49,243
- Yep, terrific day for a drive.
- Beautiful country out here.
258
00:20:49,313 --> 00:20:52,214
A frog and a bear,
seeing America!
259
00:20:56,487 --> 00:21:00,617
Movin'right along in search
of good times and good news
260
00:21:00,691 --> 00:21:02,886
With good friends you can't lose
261
00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:05,121
This could become a habit
262
00:21:05,196 --> 00:21:09,656
Opportunity knocks once
Let's reach out and grab it
263
00:21:09,734 --> 00:21:11,793
Together we'll nab it
264
00:21:11,869 --> 00:21:14,565
We'll hitchhike
bus or Yellow Cab it
265
00:21:14,639 --> 00:21:16,072
Cab it?
266
00:21:16,140 --> 00:21:18,040
Movin'right along
267
00:21:18,109 --> 00:21:21,169
Footloose and fancy free
268
00:21:21,245 --> 00:21:25,011
Getting there is half the fun
Come share it with me
269
00:21:25,083 --> 00:21:27,108
Movin'right along
270
00:21:27,185 --> 00:21:30,086
We'll learn to share the load
271
00:21:30,154 --> 00:21:34,352
We don't need a map to keep
this show on the road
272
00:21:35,526 --> 00:21:38,256
Fozzie, turn left if you
come to a fork in the road.
273
00:21:38,329 --> 00:21:40,763
Yes, sir, turn left at
the fork in the road.
274
00:21:40,832 --> 00:21:44,996
- Turn left!
- I don't believe that.
275
00:21:46,137 --> 00:21:50,164
Movin'right along
we've found a life on the highway
276
00:21:50,241 --> 00:21:52,334
And your way is my way
277
00:21:52,410 --> 00:21:54,935
So trust my navigation
278
00:21:55,012 --> 00:21:59,346
California, here we come
The pie-in-the-sky land
279
00:21:59,417 --> 00:22:01,214
Palm trees and warm sand
280
00:22:01,285 --> 00:22:03,981
Though sadly we just
left Rhode Island
281
00:22:04,055 --> 00:22:05,613
- We did what?
- Just forget it.
282
00:22:05,690 --> 00:22:10,024
- Movin'right along
- Hey, LA, where've you gone
283
00:22:10,094 --> 00:22:14,622
Send someone to fetch us
We're in Saskatchewan
284
00:22:14,699 --> 00:22:16,633
Movin'right along
285
00:22:16,701 --> 00:22:19,568
You take it You know best
286
00:22:19,637 --> 00:22:23,971
Hey, I've never seen the sun
come up in the west
287
00:22:25,409 --> 00:22:30,904
Ah, a bear in his natural habitat...
a Studebaker.
288
00:22:31,949 --> 00:22:35,407
- Hey, Fozzie, look up ahead.
- What is that?
289
00:22:35,486 --> 00:22:37,249
Maybe we should give him a ride.
290
00:22:37,321 --> 00:22:40,222
I don't know, he's pretty big.
291
00:22:40,291 --> 00:22:43,852
- Hey, there, want a lift?
- No, thanks.
292
00:22:43,928 --> 00:22:45,919
I'm on my way
to New York City...
293
00:22:45,997 --> 00:22:48,761
to try to break into
public television.
294
00:22:50,668 --> 00:22:52,101
Good luck.
295
00:22:55,773 --> 00:22:59,766
Movin'right along
We're truly birds of a feather
296
00:22:59,844 --> 00:23:01,971
We're in this together
297
00:23:02,046 --> 00:23:04,480
And we know where we're goin'
298
00:23:04,549 --> 00:23:08,610
Movie stars with flashy cars
and life with the top down
299
00:23:08,686 --> 00:23:11,177
We're stormin'the big town
300
00:23:11,255 --> 00:23:14,986
- Stormin's right. Should it be snowing?
- No, I don't think so.
301
00:23:15,059 --> 00:23:17,289
Movin'right along
302
00:23:17,361 --> 00:23:19,955
Footloose and fancy free
303
00:23:20,031 --> 00:23:24,365
- You're ready for the big time
- Is it ready for me
304
00:23:28,272 --> 00:23:32,606
Movin'right along
305
00:23:46,557 --> 00:23:50,425
Hey, Fozzie.
Look up ahead there.
306
00:23:50,494 --> 00:23:53,258
There's one of those
Doc Hopper billboards.
307
00:23:53,331 --> 00:23:56,926
- Maybe you better pull over.
- Yes, sir.
308
00:23:57,001 --> 00:23:58,696
Look at that.
309
00:24:00,638 --> 00:24:01,900
Kermit, that's you!
310
00:24:04,508 --> 00:24:06,976
You got the picture, boy?
You see what I mean?
311
00:24:07,044 --> 00:24:11,310
Kermit the Frog, symbol of
Doc Hopper's French-Fried Frog Legs.
312
00:24:11,382 --> 00:24:15,716
Isn't that splendid?
Just take a look at it.
313
00:24:15,786 --> 00:24:19,187
All I can see are millions
of frogs on tiny crutches.
314
00:24:20,124 --> 00:24:24,220
Now listen, boy, don't you
want to be rich and famous?
315
00:24:24,295 --> 00:24:26,229
- Not workin' for you, I don't!
- That's right.
316
00:24:26,297 --> 00:24:29,698
- Crutches?
- Shut up, Max!
317
00:24:29,767 --> 00:24:31,701
We're a small-time operation...
318
00:24:31,769 --> 00:24:35,569
but we're expandin',
just like you frogs expand!
319
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:39,201
- Don't you frogs expand?
- That's a myth!
320
00:24:39,277 --> 00:24:41,768
- What?
- Myth, myth!
321
00:24:41,846 --> 00:24:43,575
Yes?
322
00:24:46,984 --> 00:24:48,611
- Burn rubber.
- Yes, sir.
323
00:24:50,288 --> 00:24:52,518
Hey, frog!
324
00:24:54,425 --> 00:24:56,393
That's the second time!
325
00:24:56,460 --> 00:24:58,985
Max, I've done
my best with that frog.
326
00:24:59,063 --> 00:25:01,258
Now's the time to do my worst.
Open the door.
327
00:25:01,332 --> 00:25:03,232
- No, you open the door!
- What?
328
00:25:03,301 --> 00:25:05,769
I'm through, Doc.
The frog is right.
329
00:25:05,836 --> 00:25:08,516
You're asking him to do something
terrible. I can't be a part of it.
330
00:25:08,572 --> 00:25:10,699
It's a moral decision,
and I'll stand by it!
331
00:25:10,775 --> 00:25:13,403
- I'll double your percentage.
- I'll open the door.
332
00:25:18,416 --> 00:25:21,510
- Kermit, where are we?
- Well, let's see.
333
00:25:21,585 --> 00:25:24,748
We were just travelling down
this little black line here...
334
00:25:24,822 --> 00:25:27,814
and we just crossed that
little red line over there.
335
00:25:27,892 --> 00:25:30,258
Let's take the blue line, huh?
336
00:25:30,328 --> 00:25:34,162
- We can't take that. That's a river.
- I knew that.
337
00:25:34,231 --> 00:25:38,167
- Yeah, sure.
- Listen, why don't we just go...
338
00:25:38,235 --> 00:25:39,668
- Fozzie?
- Yeah?
339
00:25:39,737 --> 00:25:41,170
Who's driving?
340
00:25:44,508 --> 00:25:47,773
- Look out! Stop!
- No problem!
341
00:25:49,380 --> 00:25:51,848
- Okay, back it up.
- Yes, sir.
342
00:25:51,916 --> 00:25:53,474
Fozzie, where did you
learn to drive?
343
00:25:53,551 --> 00:25:56,111
I took a correspondence course.
344
00:25:58,589 --> 00:26:01,683
- This looks like a nice, quiet spot.
- Uh-huh.
345
00:26:05,096 --> 00:26:07,621
It feels like we've been
driving for days.
346
00:26:07,698 --> 00:26:11,395
- Funny, I'm still wide awake.
- Me too.
347
00:26:14,805 --> 00:26:16,397
Me too.
348
00:26:24,215 --> 00:26:26,479
I'm up! I'm up!
349
00:26:26,550 --> 00:26:27,812
What's that?
350
00:26:35,459 --> 00:26:37,859
They don't look like
Presbyterians to me.
351
00:26:51,142 --> 00:26:53,167
Hey, cool it, everybody!
352
00:26:56,113 --> 00:27:00,516
Our gentle mornin' melodies have
attracted wanderin' admirers.
353
00:27:00,584 --> 00:27:04,145
- Hey, who are you guys?
- We am, is, are and be...
354
00:27:04,221 --> 00:27:07,952
they whom as are known as
the Electric Mayhem.
355
00:27:08,025 --> 00:27:09,720
For sure!
356
00:27:09,794 --> 00:27:12,126
He's Dr. Teeth!
357
00:27:12,196 --> 00:27:16,565
Golden teeth and golden tones.
Welcome to my presence.
358
00:27:16,634 --> 00:27:18,693
- Thank you.
- Fozzie...
359
00:27:18,769 --> 00:27:20,794
I'm Floyd.
I blow bass.
360
00:27:20,871 --> 00:27:23,704
And I'm...
361
00:27:23,774 --> 00:27:25,742
Zoot.
Sax is your axe.
362
00:27:25,810 --> 00:27:28,802
Uh-oh, Zoot skipped a groove again.
363
00:27:28,879 --> 00:27:32,781
Wow, like, I'm Janice
on lead guitar, for sure.
364
00:27:36,620 --> 00:27:39,418
That's Animal.
Show 'em what you do, Animal!
365
00:27:39,490 --> 00:27:43,290
I want to eat drums!
366
00:27:43,360 --> 00:27:45,851
No, no, beat drums!
Beat drums!
367
00:27:47,665 --> 00:27:50,065
Beat drums! Beat drums!
368
00:27:51,268 --> 00:27:55,534
- Down, Animal! Back! Sit!
- Down, back, sit!
369
00:27:55,606 --> 00:27:58,473
Hey, don't forget about me.
370
00:27:58,542 --> 00:28:00,874
I'm Scooter,
the band's road manager.
371
00:28:00,945 --> 00:28:04,403
Yeah, we couldn't go
anywhere without him.
372
00:28:04,482 --> 00:28:07,815
- He's the man with the contacts?
- No, he's the man with the van!
373
00:28:09,420 --> 00:28:12,583
We're takin' this old church
and turnin' it into a coffee house.
374
00:28:12,656 --> 00:28:16,888
Yeah, with real good music
and organic refreshments.
375
00:28:16,961 --> 00:28:21,398
Boy, it'll be so fine and laid back
and mellow and profitable.
376
00:28:23,133 --> 00:28:25,226
Yeah, but what
brings you dudes here?
377
00:28:25,302 --> 00:28:28,863
Listen, see, Kermit here
was living in the swamp.
378
00:28:28,939 --> 00:28:30,873
- Fozzie...
- Then a fisherman came along.
379
00:28:30,941 --> 00:28:34,206
You can't tell 'em the whole story.
You'll bore the audience.
380
00:28:35,579 --> 00:28:38,514
Oh, sorry.
But, Kermit.
381
00:28:38,582 --> 00:28:41,949
- The band here wants to know.
- Let 'em read the screenplay.
382
00:28:42,019 --> 00:28:44,715
Yes, sir!
383
00:28:46,657 --> 00:28:50,457
See, it starts here on page one.
384
00:28:50,528 --> 00:28:52,519
The Muppet Movie, huh?
385
00:28:53,597 --> 00:28:57,465
Let's see.
"Exterior. Swamp. Day.
386
00:28:57,535 --> 00:29:01,403
In a long helicopter shot
we discover Kermit the Frog...
387
00:29:01,472 --> 00:29:03,440
playin' his banjo and singin'.
388
00:29:03,507 --> 00:29:06,499
A Hollywood agent starts
the frog traveling west.
389
00:29:06,577 --> 00:29:09,842
Doc Hopper comes on strong
and they get to this church.
390
00:29:09,914 --> 00:29:12,712
Interior. Church. Day. Fozzie.
391
00:29:12,783 --> 00:29:15,752
They don't look like
Presbyterians to me.
392
00:29:16,820 --> 00:29:19,846
Kermit and Fozzie come walkin'
down the aisle...
393
00:29:19,924 --> 00:29:22,392
to the thunderously loud music...
394
00:29:22,459 --> 00:29:25,587
of Dr. Teeth
and the Electric Mayhem."
395
00:29:25,663 --> 00:29:28,097
Which am us!
Yeah! Yeah!
396
00:29:29,166 --> 00:29:33,330
This is a narrative of
very heavy-duty proportions.
397
00:29:33,404 --> 00:29:38,467
Cosmic, man. We gotta keep this little
froggy away from this Hopper dude.
398
00:29:38,542 --> 00:29:40,601
Too true.
Too true.
399
00:29:40,678 --> 00:29:44,774
It is indeed a problem for
us to "probosculate" upon.
400
00:29:44,848 --> 00:29:49,547
But it seems the frog and the bear
are temporarily out of service.
401
00:29:50,554 --> 00:29:53,546
Wow, like, what
can we do to help them?
402
00:29:53,624 --> 00:29:56,559
- Well, if this were the movies...
- Which it is.
403
00:29:56,627 --> 00:29:58,720
We'd think of
a clever plot device.
404
00:29:58,796 --> 00:30:02,823
Like disguising their car
so they won't be recognized.
405
00:30:02,900 --> 00:30:04,663
Right, two, three, four.
406
00:30:07,438 --> 00:30:09,838
Oh, yeah
407
00:30:12,476 --> 00:30:14,307
All right
408
00:30:14,378 --> 00:30:16,471
Anybody's lover
Everybody's brother
409
00:30:16,547 --> 00:30:18,845
I wanna be your lifetime friend
410
00:30:18,916 --> 00:30:21,146
Crazy as a rocket
Nothin'in my pocket
411
00:30:21,218 --> 00:30:23,482
I keep it at the rainbow's end
412
00:30:23,554 --> 00:30:25,749
I never think of money
I think of milk and honey
413
00:30:25,823 --> 00:30:27,757
Grinnin'like a Cheshire cat
414
00:30:27,825 --> 00:30:30,487
I focus on the pleasure
Somethin'I can treasure
415
00:30:30,561 --> 00:30:34,156
Can ya picture that
Can ya picture that
416
00:30:37,434 --> 00:30:40,335
Oh, yeah So high
417
00:30:41,405 --> 00:30:44,568
Hey Floyd, take a verse!
418
00:30:44,642 --> 00:30:47,008
Let me take your picture
Add it to the mixture
419
00:30:47,077 --> 00:30:49,045
There it is I gotcha now
420
00:30:49,113 --> 00:30:51,547
Really nothin'to it
Anyone can do it
421
00:30:51,615 --> 00:30:53,344
It's easy and we all know how
422
00:30:53,417 --> 00:30:56,215
Now begins the changin'
Mental rearrangin'
423
00:30:56,286 --> 00:30:58,220
Nothing's really where it's at
424
00:30:58,288 --> 00:31:00,882
Now the Eiffel Tower's
holding up a flower
425
00:31:00,958 --> 00:31:02,357
I gave it to a Texas cat
426
00:31:04,561 --> 00:31:09,498
Fact is there's nothing
out there you can't do
427
00:31:09,566 --> 00:31:14,162
Yeah, even Santa Claus
believes in you
428
00:31:14,238 --> 00:31:17,833
Beat down your walls
Begin, believe, begat
429
00:31:19,710 --> 00:31:21,940
Be a better drummer
Be an up-and-comer
430
00:31:22,012 --> 00:31:27,040
- Can you picture that
- Can you baggy that
431
00:31:36,060 --> 00:31:38,085
All of us are winnin'
Pickin'and a-grinnin'
432
00:31:38,162 --> 00:31:40,096
Lordy, but I love to jam
433
00:31:40,164 --> 00:31:42,860
jelly-belly gigglin'
Dancin'and a-wigglin'
434
00:31:42,933 --> 00:31:44,764
Honey, that's the way I am
435
00:31:44,835 --> 00:31:47,565
I lost my heart in Texas
Northern Lights affect us
436
00:31:47,638 --> 00:31:49,606
I keep it underneath my hat
437
00:31:49,673 --> 00:31:53,609
Aurora Borealis shinin'down on Dallas
Can you picture that
438
00:31:54,712 --> 00:31:56,873
Can you picture that
439
00:31:56,947 --> 00:32:01,680
- Can you picture
- You got to see it in your mind
440
00:32:01,752 --> 00:32:06,018
- Can you picture
- Yo, it's quick and easy to find
441
00:32:06,090 --> 00:32:10,959
- Can you picture
- You don't have to buy a frame
442
00:32:11,028 --> 00:32:15,590
Can you picture
Can you picture that
443
00:32:15,666 --> 00:32:18,032
Can you picture that
444
00:32:18,102 --> 00:32:20,400
- Use it if you need it
- Don't forget to feed it
445
00:32:20,471 --> 00:32:22,132
Can you picture that
446
00:32:30,481 --> 00:32:33,712
Doc Hopper will never
recognize you now.
447
00:32:33,784 --> 00:32:35,718
I don't know how
to thank you guys.
448
00:32:35,786 --> 00:32:39,153
- I don't know why to thank you guys.
- Our pleasure, green stuff.
449
00:32:39,223 --> 00:32:41,316
Are you sure you won't come
with us to Hollywood?
450
00:32:41,391 --> 00:32:44,360
Can't, baby.
But when you get rich and famous...
451
00:32:44,428 --> 00:32:47,124
maybe we'll show up
and exploit your wealth.
452
00:32:49,500 --> 00:32:52,298
Movin' right along, Fozzie.
453
00:32:52,369 --> 00:32:55,497
Bye-bye! Bye-bye!
454
00:32:58,308 --> 00:33:01,573
Hollywood! Hollywood!
455
00:33:06,416 --> 00:33:08,350
Remember,
this frog does everything.
456
00:33:08,418 --> 00:33:10,909
He talks, he sings,
he dances, he tells jokes.
457
00:33:10,988 --> 00:33:13,286
He even rides a bicycle.
458
00:33:13,357 --> 00:33:15,825
Max, find me a frog and a bear
in a tan Studebaker.
459
00:33:15,893 --> 00:33:21,092
Gee, Doc, all I can see is a frog and
a bear in a rainbow-colored Studebaker.
460
00:33:21,165 --> 00:33:23,895
- What?
- What?
461
00:33:23,967 --> 00:33:27,334
- Fozzie, they're right behind us!
- I know! I know!
462
00:33:27,404 --> 00:33:29,964
- How did they recognize us?
- They recognized you.
463
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:31,974
- What do you mean?
- There's a hundred bears around.
464
00:33:32,042 --> 00:33:33,976
I'm gaining on 'em, Doc!
465
00:33:34,044 --> 00:33:36,740
- Can't you drive any faster?
- No, sir.
466
00:33:36,814 --> 00:33:38,304
Pull in front of that sign.
467
00:33:38,382 --> 00:33:41,112
- Now duck.
- What?
468
00:33:41,185 --> 00:33:43,278
- Get down, Fozzie.
- Yes, sir.
469
00:33:53,764 --> 00:33:58,360
Oh, yeah?
470
00:33:58,435 --> 00:34:00,369
Uh-huh, yeah.
471
00:34:03,140 --> 00:34:07,509
I tell ya, Camilla.
Great plumbers are born, not made.
472
00:34:07,578 --> 00:34:10,308
I'm a prince of the plunger,
fair maiden.
473
00:34:12,716 --> 00:34:16,618
Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah. We'll do that.
Just wait till we get there.
474
00:34:16,687 --> 00:34:19,155
Fozzie, look at that
funny little truck.
475
00:34:19,223 --> 00:34:21,953
- Yeah. Cute, huh?
- No, it's coming straight at us.
476
00:34:25,262 --> 00:34:26,695
We're gonna hit!
477
00:34:28,532 --> 00:34:32,832
- We missed it.
- Oh? You call that a miss?
478
00:34:35,339 --> 00:34:37,432
I'm getting in your car.
479
00:34:41,044 --> 00:34:45,037
- You guys okay?
- Why are you hopping up and down?
480
00:34:45,115 --> 00:34:48,516
- Because I'm hopping mad.
- Guy's got a sense of humor.
481
00:34:49,286 --> 00:34:52,312
- Hey, why don't you join us?
- Where are you going?
482
00:34:52,389 --> 00:34:56,883
- We're following our dream.
- Really? I have a dream too.
483
00:34:56,960 --> 00:34:59,428
- Oh?
- But you'll think it's stupid.
484
00:34:59,496 --> 00:35:01,430
- No, I won't.
- Tell us. Tell us.
485
00:35:01,498 --> 00:35:05,059
I wanna go to Bombay, India,
and become a movie star.
486
00:35:06,136 --> 00:35:08,764
You don't go to Bombay
to become a movie star.
487
00:35:08,839 --> 00:35:10,898
You go where we're going...
Hollywood!
488
00:35:10,974 --> 00:35:15,104
Sure, if you wanna do it
the easy way.
489
00:35:17,281 --> 00:35:18,942
We picked up a weirdo.
490
00:35:20,150 --> 00:35:22,243
Hey, look up ahead.
There's Mad Man Mooney's.
491
00:35:22,319 --> 00:35:24,651
- What's that?
- That's a used car lot.
492
00:35:24,721 --> 00:35:27,656
Maybe we can trade in both
these old cars and get one big one.
493
00:35:27,724 --> 00:35:30,716
- Wait, trade in my uncle's Studebaker?
- Sure.
494
00:35:30,794 --> 00:35:34,787
- When he wakes up, he'll kill me.
- You're swingin' this turn very wide.
495
00:35:34,865 --> 00:35:37,026
Hold it, will ya?
Here we go. Up the bump.
496
00:35:37,100 --> 00:35:39,796
Okay, here we go. Hold on.
497
00:35:39,870 --> 00:35:42,805
- Pull it up ahead there.
- Look at these cars!
498
00:35:42,873 --> 00:35:46,673
- Are you gonna sell my plunger too?
- No, he's not.
499
00:35:46,743 --> 00:35:49,371
Look at 'em up there.
Pull it up a little farther.
500
00:35:49,446 --> 00:35:51,937
Where shall I stop?
How should I stop?
501
00:35:52,015 --> 00:35:54,074
- A little bit farther.
- Okay. Here?
502
00:35:56,353 --> 00:35:58,480
- Everybody out of the car.
- Okay. Chickens first.
503
00:35:58,555 --> 00:36:03,185
My dear friends, welcome to
Mad Man Mooney's hubcap heaven.
504
00:36:03,260 --> 00:36:05,785
Today is your lucky day.
505
00:36:05,862 --> 00:36:08,160
- It is?
- Yes, it is. You, for example.
506
00:36:08,231 --> 00:36:10,665
- You're drivin' the wrong car.
- I am?
507
00:36:10,734 --> 00:36:14,966
I can put you in this German
street machine for only $2,000.
508
00:36:15,038 --> 00:36:18,474
Less a $12 trade-in
on your old vehicle.
509
00:36:18,542 --> 00:36:20,772
Now, this car is one
of the greatest...
510
00:36:24,681 --> 00:36:27,013
Detachable fenders
for narrow garages.
511
00:36:27,084 --> 00:36:28,244
No, thanks.
512
00:36:28,318 --> 00:36:31,412
What is this pile of...
Jack, get rid of this heap.
513
00:36:31,488 --> 00:36:33,547
Come out here!
514
00:36:33,623 --> 00:36:35,215
What?
What, what?
515
00:36:35,292 --> 00:36:38,318
What's the matter with you?
That's myJack.
516
00:36:38,395 --> 00:36:42,331
- Hi, Jack.
- Jack not name. Jack job.
517
00:36:43,900 --> 00:36:46,630
How many times have I told you
not to talk to the customers?
518
00:36:46,703 --> 00:36:50,036
- Yeah, I know...
- Just move this. You understand?
519
00:36:53,844 --> 00:36:55,277
Wow!
520
00:37:03,253 --> 00:37:07,849
Friends, Mad Man Mooney doesn't believe
in all that dealing and wheeling.
521
00:37:07,924 --> 00:37:10,484
No, the price on the sticker
is the price you pay.
522
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:12,721
And never more and never less.
523
00:37:15,065 --> 00:37:17,693
We'll take that one for $11.95.
524
00:37:18,535 --> 00:37:21,732
- What?
- Less our $12 trade-in.
525
00:37:21,805 --> 00:37:23,796
You owe us a nickel.
526
00:37:27,844 --> 00:37:31,541
Thank you very much. Hey, we're
all going to Hollywood. Wanna come?
527
00:37:31,615 --> 00:37:36,075
- Hollywood!
- That's strange. He just ran away.
528
00:37:36,153 --> 00:37:38,383
- Moving right along, Fozzie.
- Yes, sir.
529
00:37:44,461 --> 00:37:48,693
- Watch where you're going now, Fozzie.
- Yes, sir.
530
00:37:48,765 --> 00:37:51,996
Hey! Wait!
Where are ya goin'?
531
00:37:52,069 --> 00:37:56,938
Hey! Wait for me!
I wanna go to Hollywood!
532
00:37:57,007 --> 00:37:58,941
Hey! Wait for me!
533
00:37:59,009 --> 00:38:01,842
Come on, guys!
Wait, please!
534
00:38:01,912 --> 00:38:04,244
I wanna go to Hollywood!
535
00:38:41,351 --> 00:38:44,514
Testing, one, two, three.
Testing. Can you hear me?
536
00:38:44,588 --> 00:38:49,218
It's time to announce the winner of
this year's Bogen County Beauty Pageant.
537
00:38:51,294 --> 00:38:55,355
- We sure grow 'em pretty around here.
- What's that?
538
00:38:55,432 --> 00:38:57,366
All right, here they are.
539
00:38:57,434 --> 00:38:59,732
- The first runner-up...
- What's over there?
540
00:38:59,803 --> 00:39:03,261
- Is Debbie Sue Anderson.
- See?
541
00:39:07,844 --> 00:39:11,075
Nice-looking girls, huh?
542
00:39:11,148 --> 00:39:13,514
- Wow! Nice-looking chickens.
- What?
543
00:39:13,583 --> 00:39:16,814
- No hard feelings, honey.
- Before announcing the winner...
544
00:39:16,887 --> 00:39:19,720
I think we should thank
the judges of today's contest...
545
00:39:19,789 --> 00:39:22,280
Edgar Bergen
and Charlie McCarthy.
546
00:39:26,029 --> 00:39:29,089
You're not gonna believe
who the winner is, folks.
547
00:39:29,166 --> 00:39:32,897
- Come now, Charlie. It's their movie.
- So 'tis.
548
00:39:36,506 --> 00:39:41,569
And here she is, folks,
this year's Miss Bogen County...
549
00:39:41,645 --> 00:39:44,113
Miss Piggy!
550
00:39:48,818 --> 00:39:50,285
Thank you.
551
00:39:51,454 --> 00:39:54,617
Wow! It's a pig!
Did you see that?
552
00:39:54,691 --> 00:39:57,182
Thank you, everyone.
Thank you.
553
00:40:01,131 --> 00:40:03,156
Oh, Debbie Sue.
554
00:40:03,233 --> 00:40:07,294
Oh, Ama Jane.
Thank you. Thank you.
555
00:40:08,605 --> 00:40:09,867
Thank you.
556
00:40:11,675 --> 00:40:13,700
Thank you.
Kissy-kissy.
557
00:40:13,777 --> 00:40:16,337
Kissy-kissy.
Thank you.
558
00:40:16,413 --> 00:40:19,075
- Kermit, you know...
- Not right now, Fozzie.
559
00:40:19,149 --> 00:40:22,778
I just want to say one thing.
560
00:40:22,852 --> 00:40:26,652
This is the happiest
moment of my...
561
00:40:39,035 --> 00:40:42,766
Never before
562
00:40:42,839 --> 00:40:46,070
Have two souls joined so freely
563
00:40:46,142 --> 00:40:49,578
And so fast
564
00:40:49,646 --> 00:40:55,141
For me this is the first time
and the last
565
00:40:55,218 --> 00:40:59,552
Is this an angel's wish
566
00:40:59,623 --> 00:41:02,217
For men
567
00:41:02,292 --> 00:41:05,386
Never before
568
00:41:05,462 --> 00:41:09,592
And never again
569
00:41:09,666 --> 00:41:14,831
And where to find the words
to sing its won'th
570
00:41:16,306 --> 00:41:19,503
This love was bound for Heaven
571
00:41:19,576 --> 00:41:22,067
Not for Earth
572
00:41:22,145 --> 00:41:24,375
This love was meant
573
00:41:24,447 --> 00:41:29,146
To light the stars
574
00:41:29,219 --> 00:41:31,153
But when we touched
575
00:41:31,221 --> 00:41:36,090
We made it ours
576
00:41:36,159 --> 00:41:38,320
And could they take it back
577
00:41:38,395 --> 00:41:41,956
Oh, no, they wouldn't dare
578
00:41:42,032 --> 00:41:45,331
Why should they take it back
579
00:41:45,402 --> 00:41:48,803
When there's enough
580
00:41:48,872 --> 00:41:52,171
To share with all the world
581
00:41:52,242 --> 00:41:57,043
And fill the heavens above
582
00:41:57,113 --> 00:41:59,411
With leftover love
583
00:41:59,482 --> 00:42:03,009
Never before
584
00:42:03,086 --> 00:42:06,146
A love that keeps on growing
585
00:42:06,222 --> 00:42:09,555
On and on
586
00:42:09,626 --> 00:42:12,220
To fill each lover's heart
587
00:42:12,295 --> 00:42:15,423
And light the dawn
588
00:42:15,498 --> 00:42:19,457
Is this an angel's wish
589
00:42:19,536 --> 00:42:22,437
For men
590
00:42:22,505 --> 00:42:25,372
Never before
591
00:42:25,442 --> 00:42:30,778
And never again
592
00:42:32,482 --> 00:42:38,114
Never before
593
00:42:38,188 --> 00:42:44,093
And never again
594
00:43:06,216 --> 00:43:07,945
Excuse me.
595
00:43:08,017 --> 00:43:10,747
- Yes. Of course.
- Listen.
596
00:43:10,820 --> 00:43:13,584
Congratulations on winning
the beauty contest.
597
00:43:13,656 --> 00:43:18,787
Thank you. Of course, normally,
I don't do anything so trivial.
598
00:43:18,862 --> 00:43:22,423
- I am an actress/model.
- Oh, is that right? Well, um...
599
00:43:22,499 --> 00:43:24,797
I'm gonna be a performer too.
600
00:43:26,069 --> 00:43:29,004
Hey, Kermit,
who's the cute-lookin' pig?
601
00:43:29,072 --> 00:43:31,097
I beg your pardon.
602
00:43:31,174 --> 00:43:33,540
If you were a chicken,
you'd be impeccable.
603
00:43:34,611 --> 00:43:36,772
Hey, I thought we were
gonna go get some ice cream.
604
00:43:36,846 --> 00:43:39,178
In a minute.
I'll join you.
605
00:43:44,654 --> 00:43:47,646
Well, what are you doing in town...
606
00:43:47,724 --> 00:43:50,989
short, green and handsome?
607
00:43:51,060 --> 00:43:55,190
- Well, we're headed west.
- Really?
608
00:43:55,265 --> 00:43:58,757
Yeah, but I should join
my friends for ice cream.
609
00:44:00,203 --> 00:44:02,433
You want to come along?
610
00:44:02,505 --> 00:44:05,997
Me? You mean it?
I'll be right back.
611
00:44:06,075 --> 00:44:08,407
Don't move!
612
00:44:11,147 --> 00:44:11,347
Hello, I'd like an ice cream.
613
00:44:11,348 --> 00:44:13,747
Hello, I'd like an ice cream.
614
00:44:13,817 --> 00:44:16,752
What do you want?
Chocolate, vanilla, coffee, peach fudge?
615
00:44:16,820 --> 00:44:18,253
- Rum banana?
- Honey.
616
00:44:18,321 --> 00:44:22,758
Honey? I beg your pardon.
I hardly know ya.
617
00:44:22,826 --> 00:44:26,557
But seriously, I'd like
a honey ice-cream cone for me...
618
00:44:26,629 --> 00:44:29,496
and a dragonfly ripple
for my friend, the frog.
619
00:44:29,566 --> 00:44:33,935
Okay, one honey cone
for the bear.
620
00:44:34,003 --> 00:44:36,665
- One dragonfly ripple for the frog.
- Yucky.
621
00:44:36,739 --> 00:44:39,435
- Don't get 'em mixed up.
- Gotcha.
622
00:44:49,419 --> 00:44:51,444
All right, Camilla,
I'll get you a balloon.
623
00:44:51,521 --> 00:44:55,082
But you have to pick the color.
Red or green?
624
00:44:56,125 --> 00:44:58,787
- Can I give you a word of advice?
- What?
625
00:44:59,863 --> 00:45:02,263
Why not take both?
626
00:45:04,868 --> 00:45:07,336
What a wild idea!
627
00:45:07,403 --> 00:45:10,236
Yeah, a beautiful chicken
like that deserves two balloons.
628
00:45:10,306 --> 00:45:12,638
You're right.
I have guys in all the time.
629
00:45:12,709 --> 00:45:14,802
Sometimes they get a bunch
of balloons for their girls.
630
00:45:14,878 --> 00:45:18,746
- They go gaga for it.
- Gaga? I'll take the whole bunch.
631
00:45:31,961 --> 00:45:34,054
I wonder where they went?
632
00:45:37,867 --> 00:45:39,787
- Where's your pig friend?
- I'm not really sure.
633
00:45:39,836 --> 00:45:41,997
She said she was coming
for ice cream, but...
634
00:45:42,071 --> 00:45:44,699
Yoo-hoo! Yoo-hoo!
Here I am!
635
00:45:44,774 --> 00:45:47,334
Here I am! I'm packed!
I'm packed!
636
00:45:47,410 --> 00:45:53,280
- Yeah, so I see. What for?
- You said I could come with you.
637
00:45:53,349 --> 00:45:56,113
Yeah, but, to buy ice cream,
not to Hollywood.
638
00:45:56,185 --> 00:45:59,848
- We're going to Hollywood!
- No! I mean, listen.
639
00:45:59,923 --> 00:46:03,415
When I said...
Well, when you heard...
640
00:46:03,493 --> 00:46:04,926
Oh, brother.
641
00:46:06,262 --> 00:46:07,695
What?
642
00:46:14,003 --> 00:46:17,598
- What are you doing?
- About seven knots.
643
00:46:20,109 --> 00:46:23,510
- We'll follow you. To the car!
- Yes, sir!
644
00:46:23,580 --> 00:46:26,105
Gonzo, we're coming!
645
00:46:26,182 --> 00:46:28,776
- Step on it, Fozzie.
- Yes, sir.
646
00:46:28,851 --> 00:46:32,514
- Kermit, you're a born leader.
- Where is he?
647
00:46:34,023 --> 00:46:37,789
Isn't this great?
Here I am, floating in space.
648
00:46:38,661 --> 00:46:42,757
This is the place to be.
Whoopee!
649
00:46:42,832 --> 00:46:45,995
- Fozzie, bear left.
- What?
650
00:46:46,069 --> 00:46:47,696
- Bear left.
- Right, frog.
651
00:46:47,770 --> 00:46:49,795
- What? That's cute.
- Never mind.
652
00:46:51,207 --> 00:46:53,903
This is...
Look at our little car down there.
653
00:46:53,977 --> 00:46:56,445
This is like flying.
654
00:46:57,513 --> 00:46:59,674
Maybe this is flying.
655
00:46:59,749 --> 00:47:02,513
I'm flying! Whoopee!
656
00:47:02,585 --> 00:47:04,815
Doc, isn't that a frog up there?
657
00:47:05,888 --> 00:47:08,118
No, that's a frog down here.
658
00:47:08,191 --> 00:47:10,659
He's caught in a crosswind, Fozzie.
We're gonna lose him.
659
00:47:10,727 --> 00:47:11,989
Oh, no!
660
00:47:15,031 --> 00:47:18,296
- What are you doin', Doc?
- I'm goin' after their tires.
661
00:47:18,368 --> 00:47:22,464
We're okay now. The wind shifted.
Wait a minute.
662
00:47:22,538 --> 00:47:25,974
Stay with him, Fozzie.
He's right above us.
663
00:47:28,211 --> 00:47:30,145
- He's okay.
- Yeah. Hi, Gonzo!
664
00:47:30,213 --> 00:47:33,671
- Fozzie, come back in here!
- What? Yes, sir.
665
00:47:34,884 --> 00:47:38,047
- Watch down the road!
- Kermit!
666
00:47:40,056 --> 00:47:42,991
Look out for the billboard!
667
00:47:48,631 --> 00:47:51,327
- Take off, Fozzie!
- Yes, sir!
668
00:47:51,401 --> 00:47:54,336
Come back, you!
669
00:47:54,404 --> 00:47:57,601
No frog's gonna make
a monkey outta me!
670
00:48:00,243 --> 00:48:04,577
- I'm back.
- I don't understand any of this.
671
00:48:11,120 --> 00:48:13,611
I just gotta
catch up with those guys!
672
00:48:16,025 --> 00:48:20,428
Kermit. You were so courageous,
so magnificent.
673
00:48:21,230 --> 00:48:23,255
Gee, I don't know what to say.
674
00:48:23,332 --> 00:48:26,597
Say the bear was magnificent.
After all, I did the driving.
675
00:48:26,669 --> 00:48:30,161
And I took a 100-foot belly flop
onto a moving car.
676
00:48:30,239 --> 00:48:34,642
Yes, but, Kermit assumed
the awesome responsibility...
677
00:48:34,711 --> 00:48:36,372
of command.
678
00:48:36,446 --> 00:48:39,779
- Gee.
- Oh, brother.
679
00:48:41,517 --> 00:48:43,815
Why don't we stop
somewhere for the night...
680
00:48:43,886 --> 00:48:48,050
and have a quiet,
little dinner for two?
681
00:48:48,124 --> 00:48:51,116
Terrific!
I'll eat with you, Miss Piggy.
682
00:48:51,194 --> 00:48:53,992
Not you, buzzard beak!
683
00:48:54,063 --> 00:48:55,997
Just mon capitaine...
684
00:48:56,065 --> 00:48:58,090
and moi.
685
00:48:59,168 --> 00:49:02,865
Well, that might be nice.
686
00:49:14,250 --> 00:49:16,275
Wow.
687
00:49:17,453 --> 00:49:21,787
Good evening, Miss Piggy.
You look lovely tonight.
688
00:49:21,858 --> 00:49:23,985
Thank you.
689
00:49:33,436 --> 00:49:36,963
I'm so sorry
if I kept you waiting.
690
00:49:37,039 --> 00:49:39,064
It was won'th it.
691
00:49:39,142 --> 00:49:41,133
How charming of vous.
692
00:49:49,385 --> 00:49:54,186
I took the liberty
of ordering us some wine.
693
00:49:56,459 --> 00:49:58,051
Oh, waiter.
694
00:49:59,162 --> 00:50:02,620
Yes?
May I help you?
695
00:50:02,698 --> 00:50:04,962
The wine, please.
696
00:50:08,004 --> 00:50:12,236
You mad, impetuous fink.
It's champagne.
697
00:50:12,308 --> 00:50:15,038
Not exactly.
Sparkling muscatel.
698
00:50:15,111 --> 00:50:19,207
One of the finest wines of Idaho.
699
00:50:19,282 --> 00:50:23,878
- You may serve us now, please.
- May I?
700
00:50:24,954 --> 00:50:30,051
- Look how he does that.
- Yeah. Pretty suave.
701
00:50:40,236 --> 00:50:42,864
Don't you want to smell
the bottle cap?
702
00:50:47,343 --> 00:50:48,833
- Smells good.
- Yeah.
703
00:50:48,911 --> 00:50:50,572
Would you like
to taste it first?
704
00:50:50,646 --> 00:50:52,876
Well...
705
00:50:52,949 --> 00:50:57,784
- I think he's supposed to.
- Would you taste it for us, please?
706
00:51:11,868 --> 00:51:13,733
Excellent choice.
707
00:51:13,803 --> 00:51:15,896
Should be for 95 cents.
708
00:51:19,876 --> 00:51:22,902
- And may we have straws, please?
- Yes.
709
00:51:22,979 --> 00:51:25,971
I expected that.
710
00:51:28,150 --> 00:51:30,243
Thank you.
That'll be all for now.
711
00:51:30,319 --> 00:51:34,551
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
712
00:51:34,624 --> 00:51:36,251
Thank you!
713
00:51:38,594 --> 00:51:40,892
Here's to you, Miss Piggy.
714
00:51:40,963 --> 00:51:42,555
Drink up.
715
00:52:01,484 --> 00:52:03,418
Makes me giggly.
716
00:52:05,187 --> 00:52:06,620
The wine?
717
00:52:07,857 --> 00:52:09,791
Everything.
718
00:52:13,896 --> 00:52:15,989
It's a beautiful evening,
isn't it?
719
00:52:16,999 --> 00:52:18,694
Uh-huh.
720
00:52:18,768 --> 00:52:22,397
And the moon is just lovely.
721
00:52:27,710 --> 00:52:29,735
But you know, Miss Piggy...
722
00:52:29,812 --> 00:52:31,905
the moon doesn't look like you.
723
00:52:40,656 --> 00:52:44,057
Miss Piggy! Miss Piggy!
724
00:52:44,126 --> 00:52:47,562
- Are you Miss Piggy?
- Yes?
725
00:52:47,630 --> 00:52:49,188
Telephone.
726
00:52:55,237 --> 00:52:58,798
I did place one phone call
to my agent.
727
00:52:59,875 --> 00:53:03,038
It'll only be
an eensy-teensy moment.
728
00:53:07,717 --> 00:53:09,651
What the hey.
729
00:53:30,039 --> 00:53:32,906
Evenin'.
Rowlf. Rowlf the Dog.
730
00:53:32,975 --> 00:53:35,205
Sit yourself down.
731
00:53:35,277 --> 00:53:37,905
- Kermit. Kermit the Frog.
- Pleased to meet ya.
732
00:53:42,651 --> 00:53:44,778
I'm no Heifetz, but I get by.
733
00:53:44,854 --> 00:53:47,118
That was...
That was very nice.
734
00:53:48,190 --> 00:53:51,091
Whoa, hey, broken heart, right?
735
00:53:52,094 --> 00:53:53,288
Does it show?
736
00:53:53,362 --> 00:53:57,765
Listen, when you've been ticklin'
the ivories as long as I have...
737
00:53:57,833 --> 00:54:00,859
you've seen a broken heart
for every drop of rain.
738
00:54:00,936 --> 00:54:03,803
A shattered dream
for every fallen star.
739
00:54:05,408 --> 00:54:08,673
Exactly.
She just walked out on me.
740
00:54:08,744 --> 00:54:13,010
- Typical. That's why I live alone.
- You do, huh?
741
00:54:13,082 --> 00:54:14,947
You bet.
742
00:54:15,017 --> 00:54:17,884
I finish work,
I go home, read a book...
743
00:54:17,953 --> 00:54:21,548
have a couple of beers,
take myself for a walk and go to bed.
744
00:54:21,624 --> 00:54:23,592
Nice and simple.
745
00:54:23,659 --> 00:54:27,993
- Stay away from women. That's my motto.
- But I can't.
746
00:54:28,064 --> 00:54:30,999
Neither can I.
That's my trouble.
747
00:54:32,868 --> 00:54:34,927
You can't live with 'em
748
00:54:35,004 --> 00:54:37,268
You can't live without 'em
749
00:54:37,339 --> 00:54:41,605
There's something
irresistible-ish about 'em
750
00:54:41,677 --> 00:54:45,204
We grin and bear it
'cause the nights are long
751
00:54:45,281 --> 00:54:48,079
I hope that somethin'better
comes along
752
00:54:49,351 --> 00:54:51,342
I see what you mean.
753
00:54:51,420 --> 00:54:55,220
It's no good complainin'
and pointless to holler
754
00:54:56,058 --> 00:54:59,323
If she's a beauty
she'll get under your collar
755
00:55:00,062 --> 00:55:03,088
She made a monkey
out of old King Kong
756
00:55:03,165 --> 00:55:06,430
I hope that somethin'better
comes along
757
00:55:09,138 --> 00:55:11,538
Still, it's fun
when you're fetchin'
758
00:55:11,607 --> 00:55:13,541
And agree to see an etching
759
00:55:13,609 --> 00:55:17,238
That you keep at your lily pad
760
00:55:17,313 --> 00:55:21,249
There is no solution
It's part of evolution
761
00:55:21,317 --> 00:55:23,251
The pitter patter of soles
762
00:55:23,319 --> 00:55:25,412
The little feet of tadpoles
763
00:55:25,488 --> 00:55:28,423
Rowlf, tadpoles don't have feet.
764
00:55:28,491 --> 00:55:31,483
Sorry about that.
Two, three, four.
765
00:55:31,560 --> 00:55:36,054
There's no limitation
to mixin'and matchin'
766
00:55:36,132 --> 00:55:39,863
Some get an itchin'for a critter
they've been scratchin'
767
00:55:39,935 --> 00:55:43,427
A skunk was badgered
The results were strong
768
00:55:43,506 --> 00:55:45,440
I hope that something better
769
00:55:45,508 --> 00:55:47,499
I hope that something better
770
00:55:47,576 --> 00:55:53,481
I hope that something better
comes along
771
00:56:02,124 --> 00:56:04,092
Phone call for Kermit the Frog!
772
00:56:04,160 --> 00:56:07,027
- You Kermit the Frog?
- Yeah.
773
00:56:07,096 --> 00:56:08,188
Phone.
774
00:56:13,669 --> 00:56:18,333
It's not that often you see a guy
that green have the blues that bad.
775
00:56:22,878 --> 00:56:24,812
Kermie, please!
776
00:56:26,582 --> 00:56:29,278
- Piggy, is that you?
- Yes, that's her.
777
00:56:29,351 --> 00:56:33,549
And this is Doc Hopper.
Now you listen, frog, and listen good.
778
00:56:33,622 --> 00:56:38,491
Step outside the motel right now.
My guys'll meet you there.
779
00:56:39,662 --> 00:56:42,187
Well, what if I don't?
780
00:56:42,264 --> 00:56:45,597
Then your girlfriend
will be ham hocks by breakfast.
781
00:56:47,203 --> 00:56:49,137
Kermie, don't, don't!
782
00:57:06,155 --> 00:57:08,214
Are you the guys
I'm supposed to meet?
783
00:57:11,093 --> 00:57:13,960
Good, Glen. That's good.
Nice and tight.
784
00:57:16,398 --> 00:57:20,164
- The professor's here, Doc.
- Show him in. Show him in.
785
00:57:21,437 --> 00:57:25,237
Kermie, I'm not a bit worried.
786
00:57:25,307 --> 00:57:29,641
I know you're planning
something bold and clever.
787
00:57:29,712 --> 00:57:32,476
Well, I got us
this far, didn't I?
788
00:57:37,253 --> 00:57:39,585
- How are you?
- Professor Krassman.
789
00:57:39,655 --> 00:57:42,886
It's good to see you, Doc,
you little rustic devil, you.
790
00:57:42,958 --> 00:57:46,621
Where's my victim?
I mean, patient.
791
00:57:46,695 --> 00:57:48,629
- Step this way, Professor.
- Of course.
792
00:57:48,697 --> 00:57:51,757
Let me introduce you
to your patient.
793
00:57:51,834 --> 00:57:54,098
Prof. Krassman is
the world's leading authority...
794
00:57:54,169 --> 00:57:56,569
on mind control in frogs.
795
00:57:56,639 --> 00:58:01,269
It's a very rapidly growing field.
You like garlic, don't you?
796
00:58:01,343 --> 00:58:04,244
Tell us what you're gonna do
to our little Kermit.
797
00:58:04,313 --> 00:58:09,273
Well, we're going to perform
an electronic "cerebrectomy."
798
00:58:09,351 --> 00:58:12,616
- A what?
- An electronic cerebrectomy!
799
00:58:15,391 --> 00:58:16,858
What's that?
800
00:58:16,925 --> 00:58:20,588
It's something so sensational
that you'll have to hold on to your hat.
801
00:58:20,663 --> 00:58:22,824
- Yes?
- When a German scientist says...
802
00:58:22,898 --> 00:58:25,059
"Hold on to your hat,"
it's not casual conversation.
803
00:58:25,134 --> 00:58:27,694
Hold on to your hat!
Hat, hold! Good!
804
00:58:27,770 --> 00:58:31,137
Now, what we're going to do is bring out
a machine that's going to wow you.
805
00:58:31,206 --> 00:58:33,970
Bertram, Bertram,
bring out the machine!
806
00:58:34,043 --> 00:58:36,409
Wait till you see this. You think
we're sleeping in Dusseldorf?
807
00:58:36,478 --> 00:58:39,709
You think we're taking a nap
in Cologne? No, we're working at night.
808
00:58:39,782 --> 00:58:43,149
Each night, a new dial,
a new knob, a diode.
809
00:58:43,218 --> 00:58:46,483
- Electronic ce...
- Cerebrectomy.
810
00:58:46,555 --> 00:58:49,991
- Electronic cerebrectomy.
- What does it do?
811
00:58:50,059 --> 00:58:52,152
What does it do?
812
00:58:52,227 --> 00:58:54,991
It turns the brains into guacamole.
813
00:58:58,167 --> 00:59:00,635
First of all,
I'll pull out of this, okay?
814
00:59:00,703 --> 00:59:02,637
Wonderful.
815
00:59:03,706 --> 00:59:05,799
Second?
816
00:59:09,478 --> 00:59:11,844
Halt!
817
00:59:11,914 --> 00:59:14,508
I detest the surfeit
of provincial laughter.
818
00:59:14,583 --> 00:59:18,280
Now, we take your friend,
the little "F-O-R-G"...
819
00:59:18,354 --> 00:59:21,118
put him in the chair,
clamp on the terminals...
820
00:59:21,190 --> 00:59:23,385
drop the electronic yarmulke...
821
00:59:23,459 --> 00:59:26,394
and throw, what we call
in German, the switch.
822
00:59:29,431 --> 00:59:31,524
Yes, you little green devil...
823
00:59:31,600 --> 00:59:35,730
soon it'll be a hot time
at the old skull tonight.
824
00:59:35,804 --> 00:59:39,103
Thank you, Herr Machine.
Now, the frog will do your bidding.
825
00:59:39,174 --> 00:59:42,837
He will do your every whim, He will do
your television commercial, yes.
826
00:59:42,911 --> 00:59:47,007
He will sell your frogs' legs.
827
00:59:47,082 --> 00:59:49,414
- Zaparooni.
- Head full of jelly.
828
00:59:49,485 --> 00:59:53,683
- A noggin full of library paste!
- Let's fry them brains!
829
00:59:53,756 --> 00:59:56,850
- You've got a fun job.
- I love it, I love it.
830
00:59:56,925 --> 01:00:00,725
If I could inflict a little pain during
the afternoon, I sleep good at night.
831
01:00:00,796 --> 01:00:03,264
- We'll let you get on with it, then.
- My pleasure.
832
01:00:03,332 --> 01:00:05,562
Max.
833
01:00:05,634 --> 01:00:09,900
I'll be back later
to pick up what's left of the frog.
834
01:00:09,972 --> 01:00:13,635
"What's left of the frog." You can have
everything, excuse the brain.
835
01:00:13,709 --> 01:00:16,234
All right.
Bring over the frog.
836
01:00:18,013 --> 01:00:20,675
Kermie, whatever happens next...
837
01:00:20,749 --> 01:00:24,446
I wouldn't give up
this evening together for anything.
838
01:00:24,520 --> 01:00:27,455
- Would you?
- Make me an offer.
839
01:00:33,195 --> 01:00:35,720
Okay, I got him.
I got him.
840
01:00:35,798 --> 01:00:38,266
Good, good.
841
01:00:38,333 --> 01:00:40,824
And why don't we take
a little seat, Kermit?
842
01:00:40,903 --> 01:00:43,394
Hold his hands down.
843
01:00:43,472 --> 01:00:46,464
Get your feeties in place.
844
01:00:46,542 --> 01:00:48,840
Will you stop whimpering?
845
01:00:48,911 --> 01:00:51,539
Go out like a frog,
not a little toad.
846
01:00:51,613 --> 01:00:56,277
Okay, Herr Machine, this is
big time here. Ready to go to work?
847
01:00:56,351 --> 01:00:58,546
Hand clamps!
848
01:00:58,620 --> 01:01:00,485
Foot clamps!
849
01:01:02,758 --> 01:01:05,420
You can struggle
all you want now, frog.
850
01:01:05,494 --> 01:01:08,861
It'll do you very little good.
851
01:01:08,931 --> 01:01:12,025
All right. And now
it's time to drop...
852
01:01:12,100 --> 01:01:14,034
the electronic beanie.
853
01:01:15,771 --> 01:01:19,229
Soon there'll be enough voltage coursing
through your little frog brain...
854
01:01:19,308 --> 01:01:22,175
to light up Cincinnati.
855
01:01:22,244 --> 01:01:25,839
- Here we go.
- Oh, please! Not my frog, please!
856
01:01:25,914 --> 01:01:30,044
- Say good-bye to the frog, pig.
- Why should I?
857
01:01:30,118 --> 01:01:35,181
Because in ten seconds,
he won't know you from kosher bacon.
858
01:01:35,257 --> 01:01:37,191
That does it!
859
01:02:02,451 --> 01:02:04,385
What the heck's goin' on here?
860
01:02:04,453 --> 01:02:07,513
A pig that goes bananas?
What is this, a luau?
861
01:02:07,589 --> 01:02:09,557
Where'd she go?
862
01:02:09,625 --> 01:02:11,650
Oh, boys.
863
01:02:11,727 --> 01:02:13,718
There she is! Get her!
864
01:02:15,364 --> 01:02:18,333
I must reach the switch.
I must!
865
01:02:18,400 --> 01:02:20,391
- Switch... I must reach...
- Oh, no.
866
01:02:28,010 --> 01:02:29,944
- Now, Kermie.
- Thank you.
867
01:02:41,523 --> 01:02:43,491
Well...
868
01:02:43,559 --> 01:02:45,527
shall we go now, Kermie?
869
01:02:47,963 --> 01:02:51,592
Well...
Just a second.
870
01:02:56,872 --> 01:02:59,466
What?
Piggy, it's your agent.
871
01:03:01,643 --> 01:03:03,577
Thank you.
872
01:03:05,314 --> 01:03:07,407
Yeah, Morty.
What have you got?
873
01:03:07,482 --> 01:03:08,779
Commercial?
874
01:03:10,352 --> 01:03:14,288
How much? When?
875
01:03:14,356 --> 01:03:16,483
Take it.
876
01:03:25,067 --> 01:03:27,001
Good-bye!
877
01:03:45,687 --> 01:03:47,177
What happened?
878
01:03:49,691 --> 01:03:51,989
Flip, flip, flip, flip.
879
01:03:55,964 --> 01:03:58,455
Don't worry, Animal.
Your big scene is coming up.
880
01:03:58,533 --> 01:04:02,128
Yeah, yeah. Just be cool and
eat another seat cushion.
881
01:04:02,204 --> 01:04:04,138
Seat cushion!
882
01:04:07,776 --> 01:04:09,744
Well, how do you like the film?
883
01:04:09,811 --> 01:04:13,907
I've seen detergents that
leave a better film than this.
884
01:04:13,982 --> 01:04:18,180
I don't care what anybody else says.
I'm having a great time.
885
01:04:18,253 --> 01:04:20,084
Oh, good.
886
01:04:21,289 --> 01:04:24,986
- The "flim" is okey-dokey.
- Good. Roll film.
887
01:04:25,060 --> 01:04:27,051
"Flim" is "rooling."
888
01:04:27,129 --> 01:04:29,097
Quiet, quiet.
889
01:04:31,633 --> 01:04:33,965
This is the patriotic part.
890
01:04:34,036 --> 01:04:36,869
- Should we stand up?
- No.
891
01:04:38,306 --> 01:04:42,572
Oh, beautiful for spacious skies
892
01:04:42,644 --> 01:04:46,740
For amber waves of grain
893
01:04:46,815 --> 01:04:51,081
For purple mountains'majesties
894
01:04:51,153 --> 01:04:55,556
Above the fruited plain
895
01:04:55,624 --> 01:04:59,924
America, America
896
01:04:59,995 --> 01:05:04,364
God shed His grace on thee
897
01:05:04,433 --> 01:05:08,870
And crown thy good
with brotherhood
898
01:05:08,937 --> 01:05:11,337
From sea to
899
01:05:11,406 --> 01:05:14,967
Shining sea
900
01:05:18,080 --> 01:05:21,743
Patriotism swells in the heart
of the American bear.
901
01:05:36,598 --> 01:05:38,828
Hold it, boys. Hold it!
902
01:05:38,900 --> 01:05:40,834
Hold your fire!
903
01:05:42,370 --> 01:05:45,737
Now, boys, no reflection
on the job you been doin'...
904
01:05:45,807 --> 01:05:48,241
but I decided
to bring in a specialist.
905
01:05:59,087 --> 01:06:02,022
Now, boys, this is Snake Walker.
906
01:06:03,091 --> 01:06:05,286
Tell 'em what you do, Snake.
907
01:06:07,129 --> 01:06:09,154
Kill frogs.
908
01:06:16,071 --> 01:06:19,302
- How long is it to Hollywood?
- We gotta be there by tomorrow.
909
01:06:19,374 --> 01:06:22,309
Hey, Kermit! Are you going to
get an agent like that pig had?
910
01:06:22,377 --> 01:06:25,107
Gonzo, you know
he's touchy about that.
911
01:06:26,782 --> 01:06:28,841
- Hey, who's that? I don't believe that.
- Oh, no.
912
01:06:33,321 --> 01:06:35,687
- That's Piggy.
- Yeah, I know.
913
01:06:36,591 --> 01:06:38,582
Do you think we should
help her with her bag?
914
01:06:44,099 --> 01:06:47,330
Oh, Kermie!
What an unbelievable coincidence!
915
01:06:51,706 --> 01:06:53,970
Hello again.
It's me!
916
01:06:54,042 --> 01:06:56,306
Would you hold my laundry case?
917
01:06:58,580 --> 01:07:01,845
- Well.
- Well what?
918
01:07:01,917 --> 01:07:04,477
So much has happened to me
since I saw you last.
919
01:07:06,555 --> 01:07:09,149
Frankly, Miss Piggy,
I don't give a hoot.
920
01:07:09,224 --> 01:07:13,593
My name is Rowlf the Dog, and I was
playin' the piano in a... Oh, never mind.
921
01:07:19,401 --> 01:07:21,335
I missed you.
922
01:07:23,738 --> 01:07:26,798
Don't I get
one kissy-kissy?
923
01:07:26,875 --> 01:07:30,208
I don't think so, Miss Piggy.
924
01:07:30,278 --> 01:07:32,678
Just one little hug?
925
01:07:39,888 --> 01:07:42,379
You've been listening
to music to hug frogs by...
926
01:07:42,457 --> 01:07:44,948
and this is Doc Hopper sayin'
that if Kermit the Frog...
927
01:07:45,026 --> 01:07:47,153
don't stop right now and call me...
928
01:07:47,229 --> 01:07:51,188
and agree to be my national spokesman,
he will soon be a frogburger.
929
01:07:54,669 --> 01:07:58,366
- We'll be okay.
- Oh, mon capitaine.
930
01:08:02,711 --> 01:08:07,705
Oh, boy. Yeah.
What? No problem!
931
01:08:07,782 --> 01:08:11,548
It's okay, it's okay.
No problem. Hey, all right!
932
01:08:14,256 --> 01:08:17,282
We're in trouble.
933
01:08:17,359 --> 01:08:19,919
I wish I still had
my Studebaker.
934
01:08:19,995 --> 01:08:22,463
There's probably somethin'
broken about the engine.
935
01:08:22,530 --> 01:08:25,363
Hey, don't worry.
Someone's bound to come along.
936
01:08:25,433 --> 01:08:26,866
Yeah?
937
01:08:45,420 --> 01:08:48,787
Well, I guess we blew it,
huh, Gonzo?
938
01:08:48,857 --> 01:08:50,791
Yeah.
939
01:08:51,960 --> 01:08:55,487
But the sky sure is
beautiful out here.
940
01:08:55,563 --> 01:08:57,497
Look at that.
941
01:08:59,801 --> 01:09:04,738
We're gonna miss
the auditions tomorrow, right?
942
01:09:14,950 --> 01:09:19,216
Boy, you could get lost
in a sky like that.
943
01:09:20,855 --> 01:09:23,847
I wish I had
those balloons again.
944
01:09:23,925 --> 01:09:27,122
So much for Hollywood.
945
01:09:27,963 --> 01:09:31,592
Listen, gang.
I never promised we'd make it.
946
01:09:31,666 --> 01:09:34,567
I never promised anything.
947
01:09:43,044 --> 01:09:46,172
This looks familiar
948
01:09:47,248 --> 01:09:50,547
Vaguely familiar
949
01:09:50,618 --> 01:09:55,180
Almost unreal, yet
950
01:09:55,256 --> 01:09:59,625
It's too soon to feel yet
951
01:09:59,694 --> 01:10:02,857
Close to my soul
952
01:10:02,931 --> 01:10:07,561
And yet so far away
953
01:10:07,635 --> 01:10:13,096
I'm going to go
back there someday
954
01:10:15,944 --> 01:10:20,608
Sun rises, night falls
955
01:10:20,682 --> 01:10:24,846
Sometimes the sky calls
956
01:10:25,920 --> 01:10:28,650
Is that a song there
957
01:10:28,723 --> 01:10:31,988
And do I belong there
958
01:10:32,060 --> 01:10:36,588
I've never been there
959
01:10:36,664 --> 01:10:39,633
But I know the way
960
01:10:40,702 --> 01:10:44,468
I'm going to go back there
961
01:10:44,539 --> 01:10:46,666
Someday
962
01:10:48,443 --> 01:10:52,607
Come and go with me
963
01:10:52,680 --> 01:10:55,649
It's more fun to share
964
01:10:56,384 --> 01:11:00,377
We'll both be completely
965
01:11:00,455 --> 01:11:03,822
At home in midair
966
01:11:03,892 --> 01:11:08,158
We're flyin', not walking
967
01:11:08,229 --> 01:11:11,630
On featherless wings
968
01:11:11,699 --> 01:11:15,601
We can hold on to young
969
01:11:15,670 --> 01:11:19,333
Like invisible string
970
01:11:24,646 --> 01:11:28,707
There's not a word yet
971
01:11:28,783 --> 01:11:33,311
For old friends who've just met
972
01:11:33,388 --> 01:11:37,347
Part heaven, part space
973
01:11:37,425 --> 01:11:41,987
Or have I found my place
974
01:11:42,063 --> 01:11:45,555
You can just visit
975
01:11:45,633 --> 01:11:49,501
But I plan to stay
976
01:11:50,572 --> 01:11:54,872
I'm going to go back there
977
01:11:54,943 --> 01:11:57,878
Someday
978
01:12:00,548 --> 01:12:05,383
I'm going to go back there
979
01:12:05,453 --> 01:12:07,921
Someday
980
01:12:42,924 --> 01:12:45,324
I didn't promise anybody anything.
981
01:12:46,828 --> 01:12:49,763
What do I know
about Hollywood anyway?
982
01:12:49,831 --> 01:12:53,699
Just the dreams I got from sitting
through too many double features.
983
01:12:53,768 --> 01:12:56,669
So why did you leave the swamp
in the first place?
984
01:12:56,738 --> 01:12:59,901
'Cause some agent fella
said I had talent.
985
01:12:59,974 --> 01:13:01,965
He probably says that
to everybody.
986
01:13:02,043 --> 01:13:04,568
On the other hand,
if you hadn't left the swamp...
987
01:13:04,646 --> 01:13:07,274
you'd be feeling
pretty miserable anyhow.
988
01:13:07,348 --> 01:13:11,682
Yeah, but then it would
just be me feelin' miserable.
989
01:13:11,753 --> 01:13:14,847
Now I got a lady pig
and a bear and a chicken...
990
01:13:14,923 --> 01:13:18,017
a dog, a thing...
whatever Gonzo is.
991
01:13:18,092 --> 01:13:21,892
- He's a little like a turkey.
- Yeah, A little like a turkey.
992
01:13:21,963 --> 01:13:24,363
- But not much.
- No, I guess not.
993
01:13:24,432 --> 01:13:27,026
Anyhow, I brought 'em all out here
into the middle of nowhere.
994
01:13:27,101 --> 01:13:29,069
It's all my fault.
995
01:13:29,137 --> 01:13:31,571
Still...
996
01:13:31,639 --> 01:13:33,630
whether you promised them
something or not...
997
01:13:33,708 --> 01:13:37,371
you gotta remember
they wanted to come.
998
01:13:37,445 --> 01:13:39,879
But that's because
they believed in me.
999
01:13:39,948 --> 01:13:42,473
No, they believed in the dream.
1000
01:13:42,550 --> 01:13:45,713
- Well, so do I, but...
- You do?
1001
01:13:45,787 --> 01:13:49,314
- Yeah. Of course I do.
- Well, then?
1002
01:13:49,390 --> 01:13:51,790
Well, then...
1003
01:13:51,859 --> 01:13:54,726
I guess I was wrong
when I said I never promised anyone.
1004
01:13:55,897 --> 01:13:57,865
I promised me.
1005
01:14:07,642 --> 01:14:09,576
Hey, now, wait a minute.
1006
01:14:24,125 --> 01:14:26,059
Hey, what's happening?
1007
01:14:26,127 --> 01:14:28,925
At the moment,
we're what's happening.
1008
01:14:30,798 --> 01:14:33,392
Oh, great!
Wonderful! Yeah!
1009
01:14:33,468 --> 01:14:35,902
Zoot! Hey, Zoot!
1010
01:14:35,970 --> 01:14:39,303
Hold it, hold it.
Animal, cool it back there.
1011
01:14:39,374 --> 01:14:41,808
Yeah.
1012
01:14:41,876 --> 01:14:44,572
All right, yeah.
1013
01:14:44,646 --> 01:14:47,979
Hey, it's wonderful to see you,
but how did you ever find us?
1014
01:14:48,049 --> 01:14:51,143
Oh, easy. We just read
the screenplay you left us.
1015
01:14:51,219 --> 01:14:54,655
"Exterior desert, night."
We knew right where you were.
1016
01:14:54,722 --> 01:14:56,747
Like, can you get behind it?
1017
01:14:56,824 --> 01:14:59,384
Hey, when you dudes
have to be at that audition?
1018
01:14:59,460 --> 01:15:02,486
- 2:00 tomorrow afternoon.
- Well, climb aboard the bus.
1019
01:15:02,563 --> 01:15:04,997
We'll have breakfast
at Hollywood and Vine.
1020
01:15:11,939 --> 01:15:14,373
Movin'right along
1021
01:15:14,442 --> 01:15:16,740
Oh, yeah
1022
01:15:16,811 --> 01:15:18,676
Here we go.
1023
01:15:20,915 --> 01:15:22,906
Movin'right along
1024
01:15:33,161 --> 01:15:36,927
Kermie, whisper sweet nothings
into my ear.
1025
01:15:36,998 --> 01:15:39,432
Motorcycle cop.
1026
01:15:39,500 --> 01:15:41,627
"Motorcycle cop"
is a sweet nothing?
1027
01:15:41,703 --> 01:15:44,137
A motorcycle cop is chasing us.
1028
01:15:46,007 --> 01:15:47,941
Hey, Dr. Teeth,
you better pull over.
1029
01:15:48,009 --> 01:15:51,843
Hey, easier done than said.
1030
01:15:54,449 --> 01:15:57,282
- Drag city.
- What do we do now?
1031
01:15:58,519 --> 01:16:00,885
Oh, dear.
1032
01:16:00,955 --> 01:16:03,890
Hey, hey. The man with the badge.
The police.
1033
01:16:03,958 --> 01:16:06,654
The cops, the fuzz, the P-l...
1034
01:16:06,728 --> 01:16:10,357
- Don't you dare.
- I wouldn't think of it.
1035
01:16:15,036 --> 01:16:17,368
Did we do something
wrong, Officer?
1036
01:16:19,607 --> 01:16:22,371
- Kermie, it's him!
- Okay, gang. Let him explain.
1037
01:16:22,443 --> 01:16:25,469
This whole disguise is
only so I could warn you.
1038
01:16:25,546 --> 01:16:27,571
Yeah. Sure, sure.
1039
01:16:27,648 --> 01:16:31,812
I never thought Doc would hurt Kermit.
I thought he was gonna lean on him.
1040
01:16:31,886 --> 01:16:34,753
But now he's got this
frog killer in from the coast...
1041
01:16:34,822 --> 01:16:36,756
and the man is deadly!
1042
01:16:36,824 --> 01:16:38,849
Oh, no. Kermit,
what are we gonna do?
1043
01:16:38,926 --> 01:16:41,724
It's time to beat feet,
green stuff.
1044
01:16:41,796 --> 01:16:44,492
I love it. Chase music is
one of our best riffs.
1045
01:16:44,565 --> 01:16:47,033
Hold it, Dr. Teeth.
What's up ahead?
1046
01:16:47,101 --> 01:16:50,298
- Only an old ghost town.
- Fine.
1047
01:16:50,371 --> 01:16:53,670
Listen, you go tell Doc Hopper
I'll be waiting for him there.
1048
01:16:53,741 --> 01:16:56,904
- What?
- Kermit, you'll get killed!
1049
01:16:56,978 --> 01:16:59,913
Listen, guys. Listen.
1050
01:16:59,981 --> 01:17:02,609
I can't spend my whole life
running away from a bully.
1051
01:17:02,683 --> 01:17:05,117
It's time for a showdown.
1052
01:17:21,402 --> 01:17:23,495
Chugga, chugga.
1053
01:17:34,715 --> 01:17:37,275
Hey, listen.
I'm gonna check things out.
1054
01:17:37,351 --> 01:17:39,785
Everybody stay on the bus, okay?
1055
01:17:43,491 --> 01:17:45,152
- Hey, Kermit?
- Yeah?
1056
01:17:45,226 --> 01:17:48,627
Can I take Animal for a walk?
He needs some exercise.
1057
01:17:48,696 --> 01:17:50,630
Yeah, sure.
1058
01:18:08,049 --> 01:18:10,108
What is that?
1059
01:18:10,184 --> 01:18:14,746
That's one of my latest inventions...
a musical rotating rain barrel.
1060
01:18:14,822 --> 01:18:17,290
- Oh, yeah.
- You see...
1061
01:18:17,358 --> 01:18:21,852
I'm Dr. Bunsen Honeydew,
and this is my assistant, Beaker.
1062
01:18:21,929 --> 01:18:24,557
We live here,
perfecting useful inventions.
1063
01:18:24,632 --> 01:18:26,623
Come in, come in.
1064
01:18:31,372 --> 01:18:33,340
Welcome to our laboratory.
1065
01:18:36,210 --> 01:18:38,235
Please don't touch anything.
1066
01:18:42,016 --> 01:18:44,712
Is this the only street into town?
1067
01:18:44,785 --> 01:18:46,719
Yes, yes.
1068
01:18:47,522 --> 01:18:49,717
Hey, what are you dudes
doin' in here?
1069
01:18:49,790 --> 01:18:51,917
I'm so glad you asked!
1070
01:18:51,993 --> 01:18:54,393
We're perfecting
our latest invention...
1071
01:18:54,462 --> 01:18:57,192
insta-grow pills.
1072
01:18:57,265 --> 01:19:00,860
Well, what in the name
of Fats Waller is that?
1073
01:19:02,169 --> 01:19:04,933
A four-foot prune!
1074
01:19:05,006 --> 01:19:07,304
A four-foot prune.
1075
01:19:07,375 --> 01:19:11,038
Yeah, man. Well, what else
do these pills make big?
1076
01:19:11,112 --> 01:19:13,080
They work on anything.
1077
01:19:13,147 --> 01:19:15,445
But the effect is,
sadly, temporary.
1078
01:19:15,516 --> 01:19:17,279
Sadly temporary.
1079
01:19:27,528 --> 01:19:29,462
Hey, Kermit!
Here comes Doc Hopper!
1080
01:19:29,530 --> 01:19:32,124
I know.
I'll be ready for him.
1081
01:19:37,338 --> 01:19:40,739
Okay, frog. Where are ya?
1082
01:19:42,076 --> 01:19:44,135
I'm here. I'll meet you
in the middle of the street.
1083
01:19:44,211 --> 01:19:48,238
- Oh, yeah?
- Man to frog.
1084
01:20:07,835 --> 01:20:11,532
- All right, Hopper.
- All right, frog.
1085
01:20:11,606 --> 01:20:14,734
One last chance.
1086
01:20:14,809 --> 01:20:18,267
You can do my TV commercials
live or stuffed.
1087
01:20:21,315 --> 01:20:23,249
What's the matter with you?
1088
01:20:23,317 --> 01:20:25,683
You gotta be crazy chasin' me
halfway across the country.
1089
01:20:25,753 --> 01:20:27,687
Why are you doin' this to me?
1090
01:20:29,590 --> 01:20:32,787
'Cause all my life I wanted to own
a thousand frog-leg restaurants...
1091
01:20:32,860 --> 01:20:34,794
and you're the key, greenie.
1092
01:20:34,862 --> 01:20:37,057
Yeah, well,
I've got a dream too.
1093
01:20:37,131 --> 01:20:40,658
But it's about singing and
dancing and making people happy.
1094
01:20:40,735 --> 01:20:44,330
The kind of dream that gets better
the more people you share it with.
1095
01:20:44,405 --> 01:20:52,005
And, well, I've found a whole bunch
of friends who have the same dream.
1096
01:20:52,079 --> 01:20:55,105
And it kind of
makes us like a family.
1097
01:20:55,182 --> 01:20:57,047
You have anybody
like that, Hopper?
1098
01:20:57,118 --> 01:21:00,315
Once you get all those restaurants,
who're you gonna share it with?
1099
01:21:00,388 --> 01:21:04,722
Who are your friends, Doc?
Those guys?
1100
01:21:09,230 --> 01:21:11,391
I got lots of friends.
1101
01:21:13,234 --> 01:21:15,168
Max, for instance.
1102
01:21:18,339 --> 01:21:21,240
- Max.
- I don't think you're a bad man, Doc.
1103
01:21:21,308 --> 01:21:23,538
I think if you look
in your heart...
1104
01:21:23,611 --> 01:21:26,341
you'll find you really want
to let me and my friends go...
1105
01:21:26,414 --> 01:21:28,541
to follow our dream.
1106
01:21:28,616 --> 01:21:32,177
But if that's not
the kind of man you are...
1107
01:21:32,253 --> 01:21:35,586
and if what I'm saying
doesn't make any sense to you...
1108
01:21:35,656 --> 01:21:39,456
well, then,
go ahead and kill me.
1109
01:21:52,707 --> 01:21:54,641
All right, boys.
1110
01:21:54,709 --> 01:21:55,971
Kill him.
1111
01:21:57,978 --> 01:21:59,104
No, wait, please!
1112
01:22:51,665 --> 01:22:55,658
- Everybody goin' to Hollywood?
- Yeah!
1113
01:23:07,448 --> 01:23:09,643
Next stop is Hollywood and Vine.
1114
01:23:17,658 --> 01:23:21,059
Look at the ocean!
The ocean!
1115
01:23:23,964 --> 01:23:27,263
Yes, Mr. Lord. I'll have those
deal memos for you in a jiffy.
1116
01:23:33,607 --> 01:23:35,097
I'm sorry.
1117
01:23:35,176 --> 01:23:38,907
Mr. Lord can't be disturbed by anyone.
He's packaging a blockbuster.
1118
01:23:42,983 --> 01:23:45,884
Look! It's wonderful!
Like a dream come true.
1119
01:23:45,953 --> 01:23:49,719
Don't count your tadpoles until they're
hatched. I still have to audition.
1120
01:23:49,790 --> 01:23:52,315
Hey, ain't nothin' to it
but to do it.
1121
01:23:55,462 --> 01:23:58,329
And where do you think
you're going?
1122
01:23:58,399 --> 01:24:02,062
Hi, there!
I'm going to audition for Lew Lord.
1123
01:24:02,136 --> 01:24:05,071
You can't just walk in here
off the street, you know.
1124
01:24:05,139 --> 01:24:07,232
Especially not with
all these animals.
1125
01:24:07,308 --> 01:24:09,401
Animals?
What's wrong with animals?
1126
01:24:12,947 --> 01:24:16,110
This is a movie studio,
not a zoo!
1127
01:24:16,183 --> 01:24:18,048
Besides...
1128
01:24:20,387 --> 01:24:24,118
I'm allergic to animal hair.
Now, get along, all of you.
1129
01:24:24,191 --> 01:24:26,523
Now, wait a second.
See here, miss.
1130
01:24:26,594 --> 01:24:30,052
I may not be one of your fancy
Hollywood frogs, but I deserve a chance.
1131
01:24:30,130 --> 01:24:33,691
We're going to stay here until you let
us in to see Lew Lord, aren't we, gang?
1132
01:24:33,767 --> 01:24:35,860
Yes! Yes!
1133
01:24:35,936 --> 01:24:38,928
- Yeah, come on!
- We're gonna sit right down and wait.
1134
01:24:39,006 --> 01:24:42,772
Yes, Security? Miss Tracy.
1135
01:24:42,843 --> 01:24:45,004
I want to report a...
1136
01:24:45,079 --> 01:24:47,513
Shake! Shake, everyone!
1137
01:24:47,581 --> 01:24:50,175
- That's it!
- Look what it's doing!
1138
01:24:50,251 --> 01:24:52,776
- Go get 'em, man!
- Way to go!
1139
01:24:52,853 --> 01:24:55,287
Allergies are nothing
to sneeze at.
1140
01:24:55,356 --> 01:24:57,517
I'm allergic to cats, myself.
1141
01:25:07,935 --> 01:25:10,403
Okay, way to go, guys!
1142
01:25:10,471 --> 01:25:12,405
Thanks, miss.
1143
01:25:15,309 --> 01:25:17,243
Well, friends...
1144
01:25:17,311 --> 01:25:19,836
this is it.
1145
01:25:36,230 --> 01:25:40,166
Mr. Lord? Forgive the interruption,
but I'm here to audition.
1146
01:25:40,234 --> 01:25:41,997
Yes, yes.
1147
01:25:42,069 --> 01:25:45,835
We've come over 2,000 miles just...
1148
01:25:47,308 --> 01:25:48,570
Oh, boy.
1149
01:25:52,279 --> 01:25:55,043
We're all with you.
1150
01:25:57,518 --> 01:26:00,851
Please, sir, my name is Kermit the Frog,
and we read your ad...
1151
01:26:00,921 --> 01:26:04,084
and, well, we've come
to be rich and famous.
1152
01:26:19,640 --> 01:26:22,404
Miss Tracy...
1153
01:26:22,476 --> 01:26:25,843
prepare the standard
"Rich and Famous" contract...
1154
01:26:25,913 --> 01:26:28,541
for Kermit the Frog and company.
1155
01:26:45,966 --> 01:26:48,696
Just look at all this.
1156
01:26:49,770 --> 01:26:51,829
How did a frog
make the big time?
1157
01:27:02,216 --> 01:27:04,411
It starts when we're kids.
1158
01:27:05,486 --> 01:27:08,353
A show-off at school
1159
01:27:08,422 --> 01:27:11,323
Makin'faces at friends
1160
01:27:11,392 --> 01:27:13,326
You're a clown and a fool
1161
01:27:14,928 --> 01:27:18,489
Doin'pratfalls and birdcalls
and bad imitations
1162
01:27:18,565 --> 01:27:21,762
Ignoring your homework
There's that dedication
1163
01:27:21,835 --> 01:27:24,303
Working the mirror
1164
01:27:24,371 --> 01:27:27,397
You're getting standing ovations
1165
01:27:28,475 --> 01:27:30,568
You're burning with hope
1166
01:27:31,645 --> 01:27:34,580
You're building up steam
1167
01:27:34,648 --> 01:27:38,106
What was once "juvenile-ish"
is grown up and stylish
1168
01:27:38,185 --> 01:27:40,813
You're close to your dream
1169
01:27:40,888 --> 01:27:44,654
If somebody out there loves you
1170
01:27:44,725 --> 01:27:47,922
- Stands up and hollers for more
- More!
1171
01:27:47,995 --> 01:27:53,194
You've found a home
at the magic store
1172
01:27:53,267 --> 01:27:55,827
All right, everybody,
production number, okay?
1173
01:27:55,903 --> 01:27:58,701
Off the trucks and on the job!
1174
01:27:58,772 --> 01:28:01,263
- On the job!
- Hey, whoa! Aw, geez...
1175
01:28:01,341 --> 01:28:03,809
Wow, let's do it!
1176
01:28:03,877 --> 01:28:05,902
- Do what?
- The movie!
1177
01:28:05,979 --> 01:28:09,073
- Yes, sir! A footstomper!
- Makeup!
1178
01:28:09,149 --> 01:28:13,142
- Yes! Let's do it!
- Fozzie, take those wagons out of there.
1179
01:28:14,221 --> 01:28:16,382
Yes, sir. I'm off.
1180
01:28:22,529 --> 01:28:24,759
Scenery over there. Great.
1181
01:28:24,832 --> 01:28:26,891
Moving right along. Hey!
1182
01:28:28,635 --> 01:28:31,126
Hey, those are
the trees for the swamp.
1183
01:28:31,205 --> 01:28:33,639
Mellow and profitable.
1184
01:28:36,810 --> 01:28:39,711
- Let's make the scene!
- Okay, hon.
1185
01:28:39,780 --> 01:28:43,409
- Watch the tree, Rowlf.
- Careful, Scooter.
1186
01:28:46,487 --> 01:28:48,421
Watch it!
1187
01:28:48,489 --> 01:28:50,889
Miss Piggy, you look beautiful.
1188
01:28:50,958 --> 01:28:53,324
- Thank you!
- Hollywood talk.
1189
01:28:56,864 --> 01:28:57,864
Good.
1190
01:28:57,898 --> 01:29:00,196
The lights... Yeah.
1191
01:29:00,267 --> 01:29:02,735
Good. Save those arcs.
1192
01:29:04,171 --> 01:29:07,038
Crazy Harry plays
with electricity!
1193
01:29:10,477 --> 01:29:13,037
Sound is ready.
Give me a level.
1194
01:29:14,148 --> 01:29:16,082
Testing!
1195
01:29:22,189 --> 01:29:23,281
Rolling.
1196
01:29:24,725 --> 01:29:27,193
Okay, everybody.
Stay in focus, huh?
1197
01:29:28,328 --> 01:29:31,354
Okay. Muppet Movie,
scene 1 -A, take 1.
1198
01:29:33,767 --> 01:29:35,997
- Makeup ready!
- Scenery ready!
1199
01:29:36,069 --> 01:29:38,003
- Yeah, good.
- Film is running!
1200
01:29:38,071 --> 01:29:40,164
- Camera rollin'!
- All ready, Kermie!
1201
01:29:40,240 --> 01:29:42,800
Okay, stand by.
Here we go!
1202
01:29:54,221 --> 01:29:56,951
Why are there so many
1203
01:29:57,024 --> 01:30:00,255
Songs about rainbows
1204
01:30:00,327 --> 01:30:04,855
That's part of what rainbows do
1205
01:30:06,700 --> 01:30:09,635
Rainbows are memories
1206
01:30:09,703 --> 01:30:12,695
Sweet dream reminders
1207
01:30:12,773 --> 01:30:17,210
Of what is it you'd like to do
1208
01:30:19,079 --> 01:30:22,913
All of us watching and wishing
1209
01:30:22,983 --> 01:30:25,178
We'd find it
1210
01:30:25,252 --> 01:30:29,279
I've noticed you're watching too
1211
01:30:30,824 --> 01:30:34,385
Someday you'll find it
1212
01:30:34,461 --> 01:30:37,897
The rainbow connection
1213
01:30:37,965 --> 01:30:41,696
The lovers, the dreamers and
1214
01:31:31,752 --> 01:31:35,813
Life's like a movie
Write your own ending
1215
01:31:35,889 --> 01:31:39,655
Keep believing Keep pretending
1216
01:31:39,726 --> 01:31:44,527
We've done just what
we set out to do
1217
01:31:44,598 --> 01:31:48,500
Thanks to the lovers
1218
01:31:48,568 --> 01:31:51,867
The dreamers
1219
01:31:51,938 --> 01:31:57,843
And you
1220
01:32:10,557 --> 01:32:13,287
I just knew I'd catch up
with you guys!
1221
01:34:53,987 --> 01:34:56,285
Go home! Go home!
1222
01:34:57,357 --> 01:34:59,291
Bye-bye.
1223
01:35:00,000 --> 01:35:03,056